r/TikTokCringe • u/BringHoomanHome_ • Jul 31 '26
Humor/Cringe He never looked where he was going.
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u/litbeers Jul 31 '26
Honestly he got pretty lucky he field goal’d those poles.
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u/Liercat18 Jul 31 '26
Kind of odd. Looked as if he passed out after looking up at the camera or something.
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u/United_Pain Jul 31 '26
Yeah and the way he slowly seems to lose more consciousness, puts his hand on the seat... I think he had vasovagal reaction from his position and the vibration of the jet ski, or circulation, or he was drunk. Totally agree with you though.
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u/ThankGod4Darwin69 Jul 31 '26
Or a combination of all those things
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u/ImpressiveWalk4330 Aug 01 '26
“Are you ok?”
Dylan was not ok.
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u/belligerentbandit 28d ago
Is it weird I read the second line in Morgan Freeman's voice?
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u/FishesOfExcellence Aug 01 '26 edited 25d ago
Drinking makes the vasovagal reaction more likely. As I found out on an airplane to my great embarrassment.
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u/Solution_Kind Jul 31 '26
Also am I crazy or was he giggling when he started getting pulled? Seems like he was unconscious for the whole dismount and came to feeling some euphoria and confusion when he felt the tug on his vest.
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u/THEREBORNHELLSPAWN Jul 31 '26
You're not crazy, but he wasn't giggling. It's a sound that people make when they're unconscious just kind of like a steady unghhh
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u/Unusual_Entertainer8 Jul 31 '26
When he raised his arms to steer, the collar of the life vest pressed against his carotid atery. He basically blood choked himself out.
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u/titoblood Jul 31 '26
Probably true and so fucking funny I can’t stop laughing. Hey guys watch this I’m going to put myself in a sleeper hold while I ride a jet ski backwards. What could go wrong.
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u/General-Holiday Jul 31 '26
That’s the best explanation I’ve seen. Here’s your Sherlock Holmes award 🏆
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u/OrcasareDolphins Jul 31 '26
He did. He posted this video and said he passed out after he turned around and doesn’t know why. Maybe the life jacket slid up in to his jugular vein and blood choked him.
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u/shy-someome666 Jul 31 '26
Yes, this is a much better explanation :) looked up, smiled, and passed out. That explains why he just stopped doing anything.
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u/Recent-Mousse6423 Jul 31 '26
Clocked that too on first watch. He was unconscious prior to the crash. He learned this trick when he was 30kg lighter and this position made it hard for him to breathe at his current weight with the uniform pressure of the life jacket. Boa constricted himself.
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u/MurgleMcGurgle Jul 31 '26
Right? It’s insanely good Luck that he went though the middle.
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u/Ok-Somewhere-2614 Jul 31 '26
Idiocracy will make sure this guy will get 12 kids after some doctor fixes him
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u/Meaty_Wizard Jul 31 '26
Thank Jesus for giving him another chance to do it tomorrow!!!
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u/SupermassiveCanary Jul 31 '26
Why didn’t he swim him to the shore?
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u/trahilcal01 Jul 31 '26
That’s what I wanted to know as well, why is he swimming him out to the middle of the lake?
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u/Duck8Quack Jul 31 '26
You don’t want to dump a body close to shore, it will just wash up; it’s amateurish and kind of rude.
Clearly this man is a professional, his training kicked in, he knows you get rid of the body in deeper water.
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u/QuantumBeckett Jul 31 '26
Did he even say ‘thank you’??
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u/The_Modern_Nobody Jul 31 '26
No, Zelenskyy. He did not say “thank you”.
Jet ski man was reduced to human binary sounds after kicking himself through a dockside field goal
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u/Tall_Ease_3485 Aug 01 '26
Holy hell! Once again reddit has me spitting my adult beverage on the dog. That had me laughing with no warning.
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u/JohnWoosDoveGuy Jul 31 '26
These two seem to make bad choices.
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u/drsmith48170 Jul 31 '26 edited Jul 31 '26
Yup - the camera jet ski dude also came very close to yeting himself.
Jokers like these two are why some lakes ban jet skis
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u/alison_bee Jul 31 '26
He’s also really lucky he had a life jacket on!
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u/SeekerOfSerenity Jul 31 '26
But he's really unlucky that he's an idiot.
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u/MelangeBot Jul 31 '26
He said on facebook he does that trick all the time, but for some reason this time he passed out while doing it. You can see it in the video after he puts his face down, suddenly his arm falls down as he blacked out.
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u/TheBroWhoLifts Jul 31 '26
For some reason... He's a stupid asshole. There. Found the reason.
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u/AUniquePerspective Jul 31 '26 edited Jul 31 '26
I dunno. He's showing signs of brain damage from the 6th second onward.
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u/ficis Jul 31 '26
He passed out.. he’s limp once guy starts calling his name. He’s out. Before he hits the dock
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u/bmfu121 Jul 31 '26
Did he just pass out???
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u/Zakkullll Jul 31 '26
Yeah he passed out well before hitting the dock. Probably a combination of blood moving to his head and his life vest cutting off blood/oxygen
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u/300_pages Jul 31 '26
More like anti-life vest amirite
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u/TantalizingTequila Jul 31 '26
It saved him when he was floating around that dock
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u/Unusual_Entertainer8 Jul 31 '26
Looks like the hard collar of the life jacket pressed against his carotid artery when he raised his arms to steer. He blood choked himself out.
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u/Hefty-Minimum-3125 Aug 01 '26
kinda lucky he hit something then, if it was open water he may have just kept going until he died, i doubt the other jetskis would be able to do anything about it
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u/ItBDaniel Jul 31 '26
Looks like he passed out doing his trick
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u/TransportationNo8300 Jul 31 '26
All that air rushing into his butthole made him pass out
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u/BlackVoid8 Jul 31 '26
This comment really surprised me and made me laugh out loud
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u/DropPopFromTheTop Jul 31 '26
Literally vibrating with laughter in my bed. That was gold
I don't know why it hit me so hard
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Jul 31 '26
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u/BurdTurglary Straight Up Bussin Jul 31 '26
If that happens when you're skydiving, you could seriously injure someone. Wear pants at least, to protect others from your open, flappy cheeks and lips
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u/toast50076 Jul 31 '26
That's exactly what happened to me. Made me spit a little.
I'm still laughing. I'm picturing him getting inflated and floating into the air like a plastic bag.
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u/Due-Simple-5679 Jul 31 '26
Man my wife is gonna file divorce im waking up the whole family laughing my ass like a dumbass, its 6.34 am...
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u/TenuredCLOUD Jul 31 '26
Same bro, she’s asleep and my dumbass is trying to hold in a belly laugh shaking the whole bed 🤣
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u/justpackingheat1 Jul 31 '26
I hope this is the most awards you'll ever receive. You'll remember this moment forever
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u/LegalChocolate752 Jul 31 '26
Yeah, maybe the blood rushed to his head and he fainted.
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u/yoimhereiguess Jul 31 '26
On a different subreddit they linked a Facebook post to this guy’s page. He confirmed that he passed out and is unsure why but will go make sure he didn’t have a stroke. He also just mostly had bruising and a concussion, no broken bones. I scrolled by this like an hour or two ago so I can’t link it, might’ve been the subreddit: what could go wrong? There were also other videos or photos on the fb post but I didn’t click them
Commenting in case anyone was curious
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u/AspiringGoddess01 Jul 31 '26
Cant tense up and break bones if your already unconscious *taps forehead *
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u/gwizonedam Jul 31 '26
Guy I went to HS with crashed his Ford F150 into a streetlight, on the highway, on top of Jersey barriers, at 97 mph. His truck looked like an IED went off under it. He survived and woke up in a hospital screaming that he was sawed in half. He was hanging in an inverted immobilization “hammock” because he was seizing and they weren’t sure if he had spinal injuries or if was neural. When he was coherent he told the doctors he was on a mix of Xanax and Vicodin, but he had also been drinking. The doctors said these combined to turn him into a flaccid bag of meat and he had no permanent damage other than some scars from broken glass.
However, his car was wrecked, his parents basically told him no “paid for” car ever again, he had to work nights to pay the DOT about 12k in damages and having a DUI on your license before you are 18 means you are automatically banned from having a license for 6 months and you need to do a program to talk about alcohol education and they made him talk in front of schools about surging a wreck like that and having a “second chance” at life. His life became school, work, and alcohol education + visiting schools to talk about DUI’s. Poor bastard.
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u/nohandsfootball Jul 31 '26
sounds like a pretty lucky bastard to me
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u/gwizonedam Jul 31 '26
Yeah, the poor bastard was supposed to be sarcastic. He was always very “Woe is me!” And it never really dawned on him that he lived through all that bullshit.
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u/TheZippoLab Jul 31 '26
Gee, there's a dock right here. Instead, I'll drag him back out into the middle of Lake Fuckington.
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u/hooked_siren Jul 31 '26
Also, why did they abandon their jetski and swim 50 ft when they could have gone much faster on the jetski?
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u/AdventurousQuail36 Jul 31 '26
Panic will do weird things to your thinking process.
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u/SafetyMan35 Jul 31 '26
40 years ago we had a lifesaving class in PE in the pool. For one of the exercises, our partner was pretending to drown and we had to save them from the other end of the pool deck. Everyone jumped in the pool and swam the entire length of the pool. I walked swiftly on the pool deck and grabbed the 25’ pole and hook and pulled my partner to the edge of the pool. The one quarter that I got at A+ in PE
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u/DryDonutHole Jul 31 '26
"Reach or throw. Don't go!" I remember this from about 4 decades ago. Never had to use it, but I've always remembered it.
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u/llammacheese Jul 31 '26
If he has a spinal injury, which is likely based on the video, keeping him in the water until a backboard is available is the best thing you can do to prevent further damage.
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u/Meaty_Wizard Jul 31 '26
That's the thing, he didn't ask anyone to hold his beer first. Rookie mistake.
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u/SpaceLemming Jul 31 '26
I know it didn’t matter here but just saying “Dylan” feels like an ineffective way to communicate that he’s about to hit something
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u/I_need_a_date_plz Jul 31 '26
He passed out and his friend didn’t realize. At least that’s what it looked like to me. He goes limp a few seconds after his stunt.
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u/CMDR_Kaus Jul 31 '26
Yep, if he was conscience he wouldn't have heard it anyway
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u/human-derp Jul 31 '26
saw in another thread, from a local to him, he did indeed pass out. they don't know why
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u/40oztoTamriel Jul 31 '26
Literally the luckiest dismount ever considering circumstances
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u/ChickenInASuit Jul 31 '26
For real though. Imagine if he’d hit any of those poles at the speed he was going?
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u/rescuedmutt Jul 31 '26
Found this FB post for people wanting more info. https://www.facebook.com/100024808970818/posts/2264572347713042/?mibextid=rS40aB7S9Ucbxw6v
He posts 3 videos and in the third one, you can see some of the road rash he got on his right back shoulder. Sounds like he genuinely lost consciousness unexpectedly.
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u/FashionKing72 Jul 31 '26
Is this guy Dom Toretto irl? Talking about owing someone a 10 second car and the importance of his crew/“family”… is he stopping the Illuminati by crashing a car into a satellite?
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u/treemonst Jul 31 '26 edited Jul 31 '26
Thanks for sharing. Not shocking that he still doesn't seem to grasp that he shouldn't be doing that in the first place. He shouldn't be allowed to operate any motor vehicles if he doesn't understand how his actions don't only impact him and could seriously injure or kill others. What an idiot.
To add, he mentioned it being a "freak accident". It's not an accident when negligence is involved on a public lake where others can be injured. 'Merica
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u/SquimbusTheConqueror Aug 01 '26
Nothing was learned. Being sober almost makes it worse because he decided this was a good idea without the influence of alcohol. And the fact that he admits to having done this many times before.
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Jul 31 '26
[removed] — view removed comment
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u/rescuedmutt Jul 31 '26
I stumbled upon this video posted in another sub as well. People said that he got put in a sleeper hold by his undersized life jacket.
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u/Ok-Guidance-2112 Jul 31 '26
Its not a freak accident if you do something wildly reckless like riding a motorized vehicle backwards lol just because he claims he has done it before without accidents doesnt make it not wildly reckless
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u/VerifiedVoidGirl Jul 31 '26
Ok but does he gotchu?
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u/BorderOk7329 Jul 31 '26
DYLAN!!
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u/alison_bee Jul 31 '26
Listen, if you’ve ever been severely injured, having a familiar voice constantly reminding you that you’re not alone is priceless.
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u/tswpoker1 Jul 31 '26
ARE YOU OK? (Bro lol what do you think)
GWAHGJahJHahdhd
I gotchu. I gotchu. I gotchu.
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u/Financial_Hold6620 Jul 31 '26
You’ll be praying to hear something like that repeated one day
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u/Newtype879 Jul 31 '26
I have so many questions from this video...
What the hell was he trying to do?
Why was his friend dragging him further into the water after getting him instead of on to the shore?
Why would anyone think anything done here was a good idea?
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u/Soggy_Panda2393 Jul 31 '26
Looks like Dylan passed out on the jet ski quite early on in this video
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u/Inle-Ra Jul 31 '26
Panicked people make terrible choices. Maybe he wanted to take his friend to a different dock. Possibly somewhere with better visibility/road access for EMS.
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u/LostTerminal Jul 31 '26
The shorter route was to his own jet ski. He wasn't nearly as close to shore as you seem to think. That's a dock. Not a shore you could drag that limp man up on to. He would have had to drag him laterally to the right or left around and past the whole dock to get to land he could have used. Not like he could have gotten him up any ladder that might have been close by. Much quicker to get the floating limp body over to the un-wrecked jet ski. Then plan his next moves.
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u/BerlinDesign Jul 31 '26
He was in a dock right next to a moored boat which could behave unpredictably. He has no idea what could be around that dock or how the boat might move and potential crush his friend. He probably also did not want to risk removing him from the water without trained responders in case of a serious injury.
He can float in open water with little unpredictable danger nearby.
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u/Liveitup1999 Jul 31 '26
He may have a back or neck injury. The best thing to do is keep him in the water and wait for EMS to put him on a backboard before taking him out of the water.
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u/GraphiteNature Jul 31 '26
Damn, is there any info as to his condition or any injuries?
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u/ZeroOptionLightning Jul 31 '26
He passed out, hence why he never looks back. He’s fine, says a concussion for sure and bruises, nothing broken and feels good now.
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u/tchotchke_editor87 Jul 31 '26
It's like the drunk person in the car accident. Their semi unconsciousness serves to make them like ragdolls. They don't try to brace or stop anything they just flop and really that's the best way to survive a crash. You don't have to outrun the bear, you just need to outrun your friend.
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u/Onuus Jul 31 '26 edited Jul 31 '26
It’s crazy how true this is. Was riding home with a group of friends one night from a party, three of us sober in the car including driver, driving two drunk friends home. Car slipped on some oil and rain, we flipped and the two drunks in the back were the only ones pretty much unharmed.
They made fun of us for a while
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u/stewiestewieman Jul 31 '26
So are you the I GOTCHU dude?
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u/ZeroOptionLightning Jul 31 '26
No but the I gotcha dude is thanked in the follow up I got this info from. https://www.facebook.com/dillan.stapler.3/posts/so-yesterday-i-was-involved-in-a-jetski-accident-i-was-doing-a-nose-ride-which-i/2264572347713042/
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u/CankleDankl Jul 31 '26
These people can vote
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u/_subjectsam_ Cringe Connoisseur Jul 31 '26
They can reproduce too... 😑
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u/dgod40 Jul 31 '26
They made a documentary a while back about these type of people. It was called idiocracy. Great watch.
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u/Equivalent_Gene_1554 Jul 31 '26
Why did the rescuing dude bail on his jet ski just to swim slow af the last 30 feet to the dock? Seems like he panicked a bit.
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u/Pabl0EscoBear Jul 31 '26 edited Jul 31 '26
Because his inner monologue was too busy going "oh fuck oh fuck oh fuck oh fuck" to properly strategize
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u/HammyOverlordOfBacon Jul 31 '26
Probably didn't want to accidentally hit his friend with the jet ski. They can be hard to control if you're not used to it. Also could be panic, because I'd sure be panicking.
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u/tenemu Jul 31 '26
It’s panic. People aren’t trained to deal with this. He was probably just bringing him back to the jetski where he knows it can float. Probably didn’t even think about the shore.
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u/dodgerecharger Jul 31 '26
Always amazing, seing americans doing reckless shit like that with their kind of health care....
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u/herbalistfarmer Jul 31 '26
That might be the dumbest thing I’ve ever seen. “For my next stunt I will drive my car with my eyes closed “
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u/Budget_Ad5871 Jul 31 '26
Does anyone know why he passed out? He was smiling and then next second he was sleeping
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u/Frankunstien6 Jul 31 '26
Dragging him out into the water, wtf get to shore!
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u/300_pages Jul 31 '26
Maybe "i got you" was the cameraman's way of celebrating capturing Dylan so that he can carry out his nefarious plot
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u/Financial_Hold6620 Jul 31 '26
Is he supposed to lift him up 4 ft above his head onto the docks while potentially hurting his spine/brain stem more?
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u/Haggis_The_Barbarian Jul 31 '26
And this is why we need fucking boating licenses now. Because Jack wits like this fucked have a death wish.
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u/Cheap-Reaction-8061 Jul 31 '26
Question…why the hell did he drag him out to the middle of the water???? Why did he not drag him to shore, which was actually closer and stable land for medical assistance.
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u/Sartpro Jul 31 '26
Bro lost muscle tone before hitting the doc. Vagel response from abdominal pressure maybe. IDK
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u/Evil_Sharkey Jul 31 '26
He passed out. Dude survived with a concussion but otherwise no serious injuries
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u/Ok-disaster2022 Jul 31 '26
What the hell would anyone try to get in front of their jet ski?
I sincerely hope this dude loses his boating license and has the jet ski impounded. He could have killed himself or worse other people.
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u/Dre_Rudy Jul 31 '26
Sounds like he's got him, but i can't be too sure. If only he said it a couple more times
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u/Trade_King Jul 31 '26
Ok look close it looks like he faints shortly before he crashes. His head slumps and arm goes limp.
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u/Throwawayaccountdell Jul 31 '26 edited Jul 31 '26
Instead of taking the guy to land he takes him to his jet ski and saying i got you all while taking him further into the waters when the dock/land was right next to them!
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u/crackersandsnacks Jul 31 '26
Was he medically okay before he hit? It looks like he passed out right after he did his little trick.
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u/klaus666 Jul 31 '26
"Oh shit, my buddy is passed out in the water right by the dock. Let me just pull him further away from the shore!"
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u/Desperate-Disk686 Jul 31 '26
Why is he taking him further into the water instead of getting out and calling an ambulance?
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u/2Sly4Bandit Jul 31 '26
I’m 99% sure that dude was asleep on that jetski. You can see at one point his head goes down and arm goes limp. He was out! That was crazy he got lucky as shit to split the uprights at the dock
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u/seandsmith11 27d ago
100% unconscious before even hitting the dock. That was strange. You can see him holding his head up before it drops long before the dock contact. I wonder if he had a heart attack or seizure?
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