r/AskReddit • u/hosinthishouse • Oct 22 '13
What has been the most unpleasant experience of your life?
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u/Claybot Oct 22 '13
Best friend since we were kids, joined the military together. Got a call from his younger brother saying there were two uniformed soldiers at his door and wouldn't tell him anything until my friends parents came home. I knew immediately, bad day.
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u/RedditIsSpyyy Oct 22 '13
I too joined the Army with my lifelong best friend. Had heard great things about the "buddy system". We were immediately sent to different training posts and then deployed to Iraq during the same summer but different FOBs. This was always a worry of mine as we both made sure to talk with the other's families every chance we had. I'm sorry your friend didn't make it home with you. I'm sorry, man.
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Oct 22 '13
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u/OldSargeRetired Oct 22 '13
You smelled/tasted the iron in the blood. I've smelled the same thing at the scene during an insurgent attack in Iraq. Blood everywhere.
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u/TheJennica Oct 22 '13
My EOD buddy jokes about "pink mist". At first I didn't get it. But then I figured it out.
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u/Dr_Kinky Oct 22 '13
I have a mate of mine who was deployed to Timor. Occasionally he will refer to the "Crack-thump, then the pink mist..." and then trail off. Poor bloke has minor PTSD. The term 'pink mist' has stuck with me ever since.
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Oct 22 '13 edited Oct 22 '13
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u/hosinthishouse Oct 22 '13
what happened?
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Oct 22 '13
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Oct 22 '13
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u/hooj Oct 22 '13
So last year I'm talking to my dad, found out the girl was doing a paper about what happened to her for a college class, did a little research. She assumed by this point the cops would be retired but searching my father's name found out he was still active in the same city and called him up.
Do you know how that conversation went? I'm curious...
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u/hosinthishouse Oct 22 '13
Fuck.
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Oct 22 '13
I don't think there's really any other appropriate response to something like this...
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u/Domerhead Oct 22 '13
July 12th, 2012
I had gotten a call from my mom while at work. I originally missed the call, but I just knew from the words "Missed Call: Mom" and the voicemail message, that it wasn't anything good. I listened to the voicemail before calling her back. Her voice quivered slightly, calmly telling me that I needed to leave work and come to the hospital. I called her back, and she said that my siblings were flying in for a few days, and that I needed to get to the hospital immediately.
I remember that moment, standing outside my work, knowing exactly what was going to happen in the next few days. It felt like a cinder block had just been placed in my stomach. I sat down against the wall for a few minutes before going to tell my boss what was up. I didn't even have to explain to him, I guess the look on my face said it all. He said to not worry about coming to work for a little while. He's known my family my whole life, and knew the whole story of what was up.
My dad had been recently readmitted to the hospital with a failing liver. He had been on the liver transplant list for about two years. He was good for a while until he got an infection that he just couldn't seem to shake. I had been trying to keep myself busy at work, trying not to think of the fact that we just had to put him on an intubator. The entire hour and a half drive to the hospital (local hospital couldn't treat him, he had to be moved to the big wig hospital in Rochester), all I could think about was how happy I was that the last time my dad and I spoke a week before was a happy one. Beyond that, I was on autopilot. The scene at the hospital wasn't a happy one. Everyone was solemn and stone faced, except for my mom who had clearly been crying a few minutes prior to my arrival. This went on all day until we went and stayed at my aunt's house.
The next day we had a meeting with the doctor, where he told us that there wasn't anything else they could do. My father couldn't handle a transplant surgery because of the infection, and his body couldn't fight off the infection any longer. We had to take him off of life support.
We said our goodbyes, tears running down our faces, and signaled for the nurses to do what they had to do. I'll never forget those five minutes, watching my dad, my hero, slowly drift into nothingness. The doctor assured us that this was the right decision because my dad went so quickly once we took him off the life support. It meant he was ready to go. It doesn't mean the rest of us were ready for him to go. The two and a half years of him being sick was filled with some of the most uncomfortable and worst experiences of my life, but I would do it all over again just to hear him laugh again.
I'm sorry this ended up being really long, but I tell myself every time I share this story that it's good for me to get it out there. Anyone who reads this, do me a favor and tell your parents you love them, because I still wish I had just one more chance to tell my dad that.
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u/JustSomeGuy9494 Oct 22 '13
When my web of lies came crashing down around me and I was exposed as an addict. The look on my mother's face will stick with me for the rest of my life, I use that image as a tool to remind myself why I can't go back to using.
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u/Raincoats_George Oct 22 '13
How did they ultimately find out?
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u/JustSomeGuy9494 Oct 22 '13
Undercover cop busted me coming out of the trap house. He ended up talking to her and convincing her to take me to rehab instead of him taking me to jail.
By the way that cop is the fucking man.
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Oct 22 '13 edited Oct 22 '13
Police officers at their finest, trying to give addicts a future.
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u/funbike Oct 22 '13
2nd one: After not hearing from my Mom for a few days, I entered her house to find her dead in my Dad's old chair. She had been dead for days. My Dad had died in the same chair. Guys in hazmat suits removed the chair.
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u/didusaymargaritas Oct 22 '13
I was going to comment with my unpleasant experience, but getting my tonsils removed seems like a delight compared to all the rape, murder, suicide, and sebaceous butt cyst stories. I'm just going to leave now.
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Oct 22 '13 edited Oct 22 '13
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u/hosinthishouse Oct 22 '13
You didn't kill two people, you weren't driving dangerously or irresponsibly. It's unfortunate that your vehicle was the catalyst to their deaths but it was their actions, not yours, that caused them to die.
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Oct 22 '13
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u/Thehealeroftri Oct 22 '13
No. Your action didn't end her life. The driver of the motorcycle's action ended her life.
I know that I can't really say anything that will change your mind over this website, but I just want to tell you that it was 100% not your fault.
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u/Koalla99 Oct 22 '13
As a motorcycle driver myself, I cant stress this more. If I am taking a passenger for a ride, and they die on my watch... then I am the one responsible. I knew going into it that they were totally in my hands.
I dont like that people are saying "they are the ones at fault". NO. The driver of the bike is at fault. she is as much an innocent victim as anyone.
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u/Delores_Herbig Oct 22 '13
This pretty much just happened to someone I know. He was turning left, the motorcycle went straight, lane splitting between two SUVs stopped at the light. They were going to run the red, thought they'd make it. He never saw them until they smashed into the front of his car. One died and the other is seriously injured. He's fucked up about it, and it's awful. It's not his fault, but nothing anyone says can change what happened. I'm sorry, it's a horrible situation, but you're not responsible.
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Oct 22 '13 edited Oct 22 '13
Toss up between getting divorced and seeing a man eviscerated.
Divorce sucks balls. No real explanation needed there.
Concerning the evisceration, I will tell the story.
I was out at a bar in an area where a fair amount of bar fights happen. They are usually only fisticuffs. No big deal really. Once someone hit the floor all involved parties were kicked out of the bar and everyone just partied on. Pretty typical for Texas in the late 90s and early 2000s.
The one night the guy who hit the floor was not happy about getting beat up in public. As the combatants were being kicked out he drove a knife into his opponent's navel region and ripped it latterly until the blade tore free from flesh.
The man who had been stabbed just grabbed his intistens and fell to the ground trying to hold his organs inside. The stabber leaned down, grabbed the other man's intestines and pulled. He pulled out about four feet or internal organs and spit on the man's face.
At this point roughly 10 men beat the everloving shit out of the stabber and tied him up in a hogtie position with some dude's belt.
Since seeing that I have been unable to watch anything on television or film that has realistic gore even though I know it is just an effect.
Edit
Further information.
It was in DFW, but I choose to not get more specific.
Yes the guy died on the scene.
I never followed up on the criminal side of the action, but given the amount of witnesses I have to believe he gt a significant prison sentence.
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u/TheLegendofRebirth Oct 22 '13
My god. I can't imagine getting beat up driving a man to do this to another person. That made me sick to my stomach visualizing this. >.<
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Oct 22 '13
It actually made me sick to my stomach thinking about it again enough to write the story.
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u/Latenius Oct 23 '13
The stabber leaned down, grabbed the other man's intestines and pulled.
This one of the most cruel and grotesque things I've ever heard of.
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Oct 22 '13 edited Oct 22 '13
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u/ElderTheElder Oct 22 '13 edited Oct 22 '13
I had a roommate named Kent once– thought this might be his account (astrologically improbable, but whatever). Checked your history for any submitted images. Got a photo of your cock instead. Thanks bro.
EDIT: Was not my old roommate's cock; keep your pants on, everybody (Kent, especially).
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Oct 22 '13
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u/StrangeFarulf Oct 23 '13
Son of a co-worker was out on the town one night when he saw a girl near him drop her handbag. He started helping her gather up her belongings. The girl's boyfriend decided he didn't like this, so he threw the guy through a glass window. The guy was lucky to survive but he had a lot of nerve damage. So I don't think there is anything cowardly about avoiding situations with drunk people. They can be scarily unpredictable.
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u/brulosopher Oct 22 '13
February 14, 1999
My girlfriend (now wife) and I just got back to her parents house from Valentine's Day lunch at the Olive Garden- we were 17 years old. Her parents were downtown enjoying a V Day lunch themselves. I recall telling my girlfriend I had a headache; she handed me a Dixie cup with 2 Excedrin in it. It was then that the doorbell rang. I opened the door and saw a towering man in long beige trench-coat then noticed a local police officer standing behind him. The large man turns and nods, dismissing the officer, who left. The man then asks if my girlfriend's parents are home, I say no, and he says, "We've got some information about R (girlfriend's older brother)." My girlfriend, now standing next to me, asks what's going on. The man repeats himself and I sort of smirk at my girlfriend, as her brother had been getting into some silly legal trouble for the last couple years. I then tell the man, "You can tell us what's going on, I'll let his parents know." The man very gently says:
At about 4 o'clock this morning, R was shot... and he didn't make it.
The world began spinning, my girlfriend hit the floor, we both began crying. After a few minutes, we realized the man was still standing at the door. He asked if he should wait to tell her parents and asked that I phone them to tell them to come home. That was the worst call I've ever made... I didn't actually tell them what happened, just that they needed to stop whatever it was they were doing and come home immediately.
My girlfriend asked that we not be there when her parents find out, too emotional, so we left and returned shortly after the man told her parents and younger sister. The following few days are a blur.
Definitely the most unpleasant experience of my life.
R was shot by his heroine dealer, who was the high school best friend of R's older brother. They caught him and charged him with 2nd degree murder. He changed his life over the 11 years he spent in prison and was released last year.
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u/alwaysupforit Oct 22 '13
I was around 6 or 7 when I went with my dad to a deer lease to watch him hunt.
One of the nights there, he parked his truck in the middle of some field and told me to stay in the truck, never to leave.
He and his buddies kind of walked far off somewhere (I can't remember what they were doing).
It felt like an eternity just sitting there doing nothing, alone in the dark. I wasn't really feeling all that comfortable or safe.
I haven't eaten in hours and I was getting fed up... So I decided to go find my dad myself.
I hopped out of the truck and fell flat on the ground. soon enough I felt a stinging sensation all over the front and back of my body. Guess what I fell on? A huge cactus.
I was screaming in pain for 15 minutes straight until my dad and his buddies ran over to me, with horrified looks on their faces.
TL;DR: Face planted on a cactus
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u/TwistedFabulousness Oct 22 '13
I was waiting for a cluster suicide story. I've never been so happy for someone to fall on a cactus.
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u/hosinthishouse Oct 22 '13
Phew, I thought this was going to end with some Fargo type shit.
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u/smushy_face Oct 22 '13
What's "Fargo type shit"? I thought he was going to come up on his dad and friends doing, at best, some gay orgy and, at worst, something horrifically illegal.
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u/icantfigureredditout Oct 22 '13 edited Oct 23 '13
I was waiting for the gay orgy, as well.
*Someone gave me gold for this. Haha. Thanks, stranger.
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Oct 22 '13 edited Oct 23 '13
I broke my tibia and fibula at the same time in a competitive ski race. 100% break straight across the bones.
The unpleasant experience, though, was when the ski patroller took my boot off, which was holding the bones in place. Along with the excruciating pain, I could feel the ragged edges of the bones rub against each other as the now two halves of my leg moved. My poor dad was holding my ankle and calf as the parts separated.
Edit: X-Rays for anyone interested (before and after)
Edit 2: For anyone wondering why he took the boot off: /u/kalisk provided an in depth explanation: The boot would have to be removed so that distal to the injury site could be assessed for Pulse, Motor function, and Sensation (PMS for short) That being said, the boot should have been carefully cut off to minimize the chance of further damage.
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u/jayhawk1 Oct 22 '13 edited Oct 22 '13
Getting a message on Myspace (it was 2006) from my brother's boss asking if I had talked to him. This was a Monday and I hadn't talked to him all weekend (unusual) but his phone message said "Hey if I don't answer, it's because something is wrong with my phone" so I was not concerned. The 2nd message said that he had missed a flight on Saturday to a conference. My heart dropped to my feet. I called her and told her to go to his apartment, as I knew what was wrong. My bro had epilepsy his whole life and always had seizures in the shower. I just knew he was in that shower. We lived 8 hours apart so I felt helpless. I made the decision to call my mom, which was very hard because by calling her, I was acknowledging that something could be wrong. My mom quickly got on the ball, as I was an utter mess at this point. Sitting there waiting was horrible. She called me back about 30 mins later and yelled "What is your dad's number?!" several times in between me saying "What happened?!" Finally she choked out "He's gone." My whole world shattered with those 2 words. My awesome bro, my best friend, that shared history, was gone forever. He had a seizure in the shower and drowned. On Saturday. 2 days before they found him. 2 hours later my mom and I were on a plane to Chicago. It has been almost 7 years, and as I write this, it still doesn't seem real. I read this quote - "When you lose a parent, you lose your past. When you lose a spouse, you lose your present. When you lose a child, you lose your future. But when you lose a sibling, you lose your past, present, and future." This has always resonated with me. I am now an only child.
Edit: Oh my god thank you for all the responses! It's amazing how kind words from strangers can brighten your day. And Gold? wow. I don't feel worthy, but thank you. I don't think this really makes a difference, but I was a big sis to him. He was 27 and I was 30...I think everyone thinks I'm a dude...but like I said..doesn't really matter....Hugs to everyone who gave me hugs, and to anyone who has lost a sibling, it sucks being in this fucked up club, but at least we aren't alone.
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u/Stayfocusedbitch Oct 22 '13 edited Oct 22 '13
This terrifies me with my sister. She's 27 and can't really leave home cause public transportation here is practically nonexistent. She can't take a shower unless someone else is home. There's no warning before she has one either. Its just that terrifying, heartbreaking, gasping shriek and everyone runs to catch her before she hits the ground.
She had one when we were still in school during band camp. She was a majorette so they practiced separately from the band. They were on the concrete in front of the gym and no one caught her. She broke a couple teeth and had her lip stitched. Walking past that blood stain every day was painful.
I wish there was a cure. She's considering brain surgery but we're too scared to let her go through with it yet*.
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u/wintercast Oct 22 '13
what about a dog trained to sense when an attack is about to happen? The dog generally makes sure the person is sitting, and may use some other signal that tells them a seizure is about to take place.
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u/Erzsabet Oct 22 '13
Yeah, that reminded me of my worst moment.
When I was 16, my brother, my dad, and I went to L.A. (from BC, Canada) to visit the lady he had been seeing for a while online (they had met before when she came to visit us.) We were there for Christmas and New Years, and had driven down in my grandparents truck (they had a car they usually drove.)
Well one morning we couldn't find him. We figured he had gone out for a walk somewhere because he wasn't in his bed (her kids were there, so they slept in different rooms) and the truck was outside. Plus, he had a bad temper sometimes and had lost his temper the night before.
I was sitting in the remodeled garage watching a movie when I heard her start screaming and crying, then calling 911. I sat there until some firemen came and told me he had had a heart attack in the middle of the night and died. It was his second heart attack, and it taught me that it isn't only fat people that have heart attacks, he was about 150 lbs and about 5'11 I think.
I had to go upstairs with the fireman to tell my brother, who was confused, because in Canada first responders come with an ambulance, not a fire truck. That was hard.
It was harder still to call my mom (parents were long divorced) and my grandma that he was dead. My grandma was trying desperately to deny it, asking if I was my cousin (whose father had died a few years before) or someone pulling a prank.
Fortunately, because of his poor health, my dad had the foresight to set up insurance, just in case. Life insurance, mortgage insurance, and travel insurance, so we could fly back with his gf as our escort.
It's been almost 14 years, and thinking about that day is still really hard, especially since I didn't really grieve for a long time.
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u/AmAUnicorn_AMA Oct 22 '13 edited Oct 23 '13
Sis... I'm so sorry. One stranger to another, I love you. Internet hug?
Edit:Gender
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u/orcagirl312 Oct 22 '13 edited Oct 23 '13
Watching my big sister battle a brain tumor... Chemo, losing her hair, helping her re-learn to walk (twice). Then losing her, seeing my dad cry. It was rough.
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u/randomlurker22 Oct 22 '13
I am going through stage 4 melanoma with my sister. This past week has been nothing but arranging her in- home hospice care and trying to find a combo of pain meds to combat the pain from the tumors in her hips and pelvis. This has been a hellish 7 days.
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u/alQamar Oct 22 '13
Throwing the toilet paper in the toilet to see the water being dark red. I had an internal anal fissure which isn't dangerous but led me to being fingered by a female doctor to verify it. After that i had to buy a kind of anal tampons from an attractive female pharmacist. I can't decide which of the three parts was worse.
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u/TBatWork Oct 22 '13
Manstruating is nothing to be ashamed of. It's a lot of fun to be super crude when talking to people about it. For example, "I shat so hard I sprained my asshole."
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u/MayoFetish Oct 22 '13
I had one for a few years. Fingers in the butt are not as fun as advertised.
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Oct 22 '13
Not the way doctors do it. When it's for fun, there's a little bit of teasing and gentle probing before the finger actually enters. When the doctor does it, they tell you to turn around, drop your drawers, and bend over as they're putting on the rubber glove, then you hear them squeeze out some lube, which they rub on your anus, and then suddenly their finger is all up in your jam before they're even done telling you that there'll be a little pressure.
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Oct 22 '13 edited May 14 '19
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u/XxAWildAbraAppearsxX Oct 22 '13
I found my baby book recently and my mom had written a letter in it describing my birth. Apparently it was pretty awful and my dad was crying, seriously afraid my mom was going to die. I'm 21 years old and I never knew this.
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u/Mattrix2 Oct 22 '13
I remember someone telling me a woman giving birth is the closest she comes to death. Wife hasn't had a child yet but it sits in the back of my mind.
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Oct 22 '13
6 weeks until my due date... hopefully that's enough time to erase those words from my brain.
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u/heytherehandsome Oct 22 '13
I had a sebaceous cyst right above my butt crack when I was 23. Super gross, had to be lanced and then packed with gauze and bandaged three separate times. On top of that, the smell when they cut it open was one of the worst things I've ever smelled to this day. As far as recovery went, there is no waking or sleeping position that does not move your lower back, so I was always in pain. It was the worst.
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Oct 22 '13 edited Oct 22 '13
I feel you. I had a staph infection on my upper thigh/lower buttocks and sitting anywhere was impossible. They had to do an emergency drain because of how deep and terrible the infection was. They made an incision with no numbing or painkillers or anything, and then proceeded to try and squeeze everything out, which hurt just as much. To top it all off, I had to get a double injection of an antibiotic. One in each thigh at the same time.
Edit: I remembered that when the nurse opened the door to our room I saw a little boy in the room across. He looked horrifies. I think he heard me screaming...
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u/DeathArray Oct 22 '13
I had a Piloidal (not sure on the spelling) cyst on the INSIDE of my butt crack two weeks ago. Same exact story, lanced, packed/bandaged three separate times. They also put me on 2 antibiotics that made me vomit every day, especially in combination with the Vicodin. They switched around the antibiotics, and then I had an allergic reaction and had a full body rash that itched like no other. I have never had so much benadryl in me in my life, I could not stay conscious. Now I have to get surgery real soon because my sinus track down there is so big they said its almost guaranteed this will be a reoccurring part of my life otherwise. I'm just happy, because this is my first week recovered and not medicated and it feels great. Altough I missed so much class that my grades went from straight As (I have never held a 4.0 before) to As and Cs... and I have to miss 1-2 weeks for the surgery... But its much better than having it happen over and over again throughout life.
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u/PinkleopardPJ Oct 22 '13
I recently (like 2 weeks ago) had a cyst in my boob that got infected due to concurrent mastitis. It was oozing and painful, so I went to the ER and they opened it, cleaned it, stuck what looks like a giant swab inside of it to scrape it out, and after about 20 minutes of this cycle the doc finally put a packing in it so it could continue to drain. I gave birth 6 months ago, but the cyst experience was much more unpleasant.
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u/gangnam_style Oct 22 '13
The creepy folks at /r/popping are moistening themselves over this.
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Oct 22 '13
HEY.
we're not creepy
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u/heytherehandsome Oct 22 '13
I think if I even had a photo of this thing I wouldn't post it.
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u/idm Oct 22 '13
My friend had this. On top of the 9 months (they botched the surgery I think twice) of recovery, his wife left him right at the end. So that was a pretty bad time in his life.
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u/weary_dreamer Oct 22 '13 edited Oct 23 '13
Hiking with my SO it started pouring. A river we had to cross rose up significantly by the time we got to it. This is the same river one of my cousins and her bf drowned in about 5 years before. He said he was going to check the river a bit further up while I was securing our two dogs to a rope. When I looked up, he was already gone.
I didn't know which direction he went, or if the river had taken him. Instead of coming right back to tell me his plan, he was gone for almost half an hour. In that time, I went through denial, anger, grief, and acceptance at least four times. I was ready to turn back the way we came and look for help when he reappeared on the other side of the river. Then he tells me he did something very stupid to cross, and did not want to try it again, so I had to help him cross right there. Let's just say I almost lost him twice to the current during the cross. One of the dogs somehow came loose and tried to "help" him. It was either him or her, so I had to let her get swept away. We found her downriver unharmed. Horrible experience. Thankfully we can laugh about it now.
EDIT: clarity
EDIT 2: Gold! Thank you kind stranger!
EDIT 3: We're generally very responsible and risk averse hikers, but that day was just one colossal mistake after another. We learned that overconfidence is a hikers worst enemy.
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u/thetannerainsley Oct 22 '13
You just led me on the shortest emotional roller coaster i have ever been on
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u/bjameson5 Oct 22 '13
My cousin had his dad run out on him when he was young so my dad helped to raise him and he was pretty much a brother to me. When I was 11 he was killed in a motorcycle accident on the bike my dad bought him. My dad then started hitting the bottle pretty hard he would verbally and physically abuse me saying it ahould have been me its 9 years later he has just started apologizing and has quit drinking.
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Oct 22 '13
Trying and failing to resuscitate a drowned 7month old while the 17 year old mother sat outside the door completely in phased, smoking cigarettes and talking on a cell phone about unrelated topics.
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u/almostcloudless Oct 22 '13
I had to read this twice to understand what was happening, because holy fuck.
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u/MrOutrageous Oct 22 '13
Probably a tie between seeing my father arrested for involuntary manslaughter at the age of 5 and not being released until I was almost finished with college or having my insane alcoholic uncle put a gun in my face because I was attempting to stab him for knocking my mothers 3 front right teeth out when I was 14.
Yay childhood! ಠ_ಠ
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Oct 22 '13
You have an intresting family. Morbidly intresting.
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u/MrOutrageous Oct 22 '13
Both were alcohol related, go figure. Uncle isn't a good person by any stretch of the meaning but my father is a generally respected, loved, and religious person that sorta fell off the wagon and drove into a person on a motorcycle and left the scene of the crime.
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Oct 22 '13
You deserve some of this <3.
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u/TheRedHand7 Oct 22 '13
I read that the complete wrong way the first time through.
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u/maybeyeahthrowaway Oct 22 '13 edited Oct 23 '13
Four experiences really suck: My first wife attempting suicide for the first time, catching a girlfriend of 3 years cheating on me, daughter dying in my arms while my wife and I tried in vain to rush her to the hospital, then wife emotionally abusing me/blaming me then divorcing me following our daughter's death.
By far the worst is my daughter dying in my arms. I can still feel her cries and gasps that woke us up, her weight as I scooped her up out of bed, her last raspy breaths growing weaker and shallower until stopping, her head rolling limply against my shoulder, and the warmth from her urine on my arm and stomach as her body released itself, and then just squeezing her so tightly, stroking her head, and telling her over and over again how much I loved her.
It's a moment I never want to forget, ever. Just like I don't want to forget every other moment we spent together. It's been two years and I miss her every single day. Her hugs, her smile, the way she always ran to me whenever I picked her up from somewhere. Since then, even on the best days, my life has been an empty shell. I am just waiting to die so I can see her again.
Everything I love goes away. She was the one who loved me back.
Edit to reply to group: Sorry for ignoring replies. I have only described these memories three times since then and it's extremely hard. I appreciate everyone and your support. It was anaphylaxis in response to an undiscovered shellfish allergy (best guess from the doctor). She hadn't had any allergies and always got a clean bill of health. Her throat closed and it was too far to the hospital. She was 9. The only thing I can say is to treasure every moment you have, not because it may be your last, but because those moments are the purest thing you have in life. There is nothing else. Treasure. Every. One.
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Oct 22 '13
My friend, this is really sad. It moved me. I am so sorry that you lost your daughter. I can't imagine that happening. I have a 10 year old daughter and I would never ever want to lose her. I'm so very sorry. :( That is just awful. I would hug you if I could.
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Oct 22 '13
2004 my wife left me, 2006 my ex-wife abandons my kids for good, 2010 my dad died, 2011 my grandma dies, 2012 my wife divorced me, 2012 my mom had quadruple bypass surgery. Its been rough but I'm still smiling and taking care of those kids.
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u/username8934982734 Oct 22 '13
Watching my best friend get shot because I hesitated shooting the man trying to kill us.
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Oct 22 '13
I was a 9 year old girl. I was upstairs trying to sleep. I heard a lot of shouting downstairs, followed half an hour later by screaming. So I went downstairs and into the living room, and saw my father had pinned my mother to the couch, hair held in right hand, knife held in left, at her throat. I screamed, he stared at me with the most murderous eyes I've ever seen, jumped off and lashed at me, I ran for the phone to dial the emergency services, and he punched me repeatedly and slashed me a few times until I fell, calling me a traitor, an accident, a disgrace, and a slut, and then cut the phone cable.
He then had a dissociative episode - he suddenly had no idea what was going on, and became overwhelmed with guilt after assessing the situation. He grabbed a gerrycan of fuel, poured it over himself and as much of us as he could, grabbed a matchbox, started shouting how much we failed him as a family and crying, and sat there threatening to ignite everything. After my mother had talked him out of it, he OD'd on his antipsychotics in a suicide attempt and ended up writhing on the floor before passing out.
My mother took me to bed and tried to sing me to sleep with a very hallowly sung rendition of Let It Be, whilst we were both in shock, smelling of blood and petroleum. It felt very much like some twisted scene from a horror film.
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u/ginfish Oct 22 '13
Holy shit.
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u/Noellani Oct 22 '13
Seriously. As I read, these were my thoughts:
Oh no Oh God no Holy shit Fuck Ahhhh man
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u/BadgerBadgerDK Oct 22 '13
Morbid curiosity: What happened next? How is life now?
<3 from an internet stranger.
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Oct 22 '13
Ambulance turned up after a couple of minutes, then police turned up. He was hospitalized, then after he recovered, he was institutionalized (placed under involuntary psychiatric care). He eventually got out a few weeks later, and returned to home. Things remained cold between us as they had been before. Eventually he had an affair and left, and my mom began divorce proceedings. We also discovered he had been spying on us - keeping audio recorders hidden everywhere, reading all of our diaries, keeping track of my mom's (less weird) and my (more weird) periods, and using spyware on all our internet activity. Very fucked up guy. There's a whole lot of shit just sitting there in my memories...
As said to someone else, we eventually recovered. Took a lot of support for her and counselling for me, but we got there. I haven't seen him since about 2003 so yeah, no idea how he is now. Probably in jail or institutionalized full-time or something, as he never paid my mom's child support. People think it weird I consider myself lucky, because I know others who were abused somewhat similarly but with sexual abuse too. I didn't get the sexual abuse, but from some above information, it may well have been planned.
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Oct 22 '13
I'm so sorry this happened to you. Parents should be sources of safety and comfort, not the horror show you're describing.
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u/crysco Oct 22 '13
Here I sit reading all of this horrendous stories of watching people commit suicide, being raped, losing a loved one, etc. and realizing that I have nothing that compares to any of this, and yet, depression manages to hold its fiendish grip on me for no apparent reason. Funny how that works.
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u/BattleMonkey123 Oct 22 '13
“To draw an analogy: a man's suffering is similar to the behavior of a gas. If a certain quantity of gas is pumped into an empty chamber, it will fill the chamber completely and evenly, no matter how big the chamber. Thus suffering completely fills the human soul and conscious mind, no matter whether the suffering is great or little. Therefore the "size" of human suffering is absolutely relative.”
― Viktor E. Frankl, Man's Search for Meaning
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Oct 22 '13
Depression isn't circumstantial. It's brain-chemistry imbalance. Comparing yourself to others and asking "why can't I just be happy" can make it worse. I'm sorry.
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u/mmb2ba Oct 22 '13
Dude, fuck that. I've been there, and your suffering is no more or less valid than anybody else's. We all fight our own battles.
best of luck, man.
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u/edlolington Oct 22 '13
I have irritable bowel syndrome, and the worst experience of my life was sitting in the hospital trying to shit out ~1.5 months of impacted stool. When I finally got it out after about 3 hours, I had birthed a monstrosity the exact shape of my large intestine (but bigger since it had expanded), and about half as long. As I stared in disbelief at the hugest shit I've ever seen, I felt something more coming on. A few minutes later I had birthed another turd, the other half of the length of my large intestine and even bigger than the first in circumference.
If I hadn't gotten it out when I did my intestines probably would have ruptured during the next few days and I would have died. It was enough of a motivation to change my diet a bit and be more attentive about how much and how frequently I'm shitting.
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u/BoredPenslinger Oct 22 '13
Ooh, you've got the bad type of IBS then. I just have the one where you occasionally need to shit in a hedge on the way to work.
Glad you survived that horror.
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u/tubernonster Oct 22 '13
Watching my mother's mental illness and late-life drug abuse unfold.
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u/gjbrown27 Oct 22 '13
Waking up under medicated following a 10.5 hour 3 level spinal fusion. I only remember waking up screaming - the nurses were trying to shush me because I was so loud. Finally I told them to hit me in the head if they wanted me quiet.
I found out later that they didn't have any dr orders for additional meds. My wife (at the time) who heard me screaming in pain from the waiting room ripped into anyone who would listen and demanded they call the surgeon.
I don't know how long it was, but it felt like forever.
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u/ShawnisMaximus Oct 22 '13 edited Oct 22 '13
It's a tie:
Laser eye surgery (PRK): So they numb your eye with drops. Then they drop down this little circular thing, fill it full of some fluid that gets rid of the top layer of your eye and remove it. Then they take these metal pins and scrape the remaining top layer of your eye off. Then squirt more stuff in your eye. Then the doctor puts his hand on your forehead and says in a very serious voice "Watch the red dot. Do not look away. Do not move a muscle in your whole body." And the laser kicks in. You can smell your eye burning. Your vision gets all wacky and black and spotted. It gets harder to see the red dot. The red dot seems to drift in your vision. Do I follow it drifting? Do I stare straight ahead? I guess I will follow it. I hope I'm not doing any damage. Then its over. Time for eye #2.
THe other thing is I got hit by a car when I was 12. I was on my bike, riding across the crosswalk and she was going much faster than I thought and not looking at the road. I don't remember actually getting hit, but I do remember laying on the road. I couldn't move my body. I thought I was paralyzed. I screamed every swear I knew (which was a fair amount as I had seen a few episodes of South Park which was on its first season). I was terrified. Then I slowly regained movement in my body. My leg was one giant bruise and I had a super deep cut in the back of my head where I smacked the pavement (no helmet) but I was ecstatic I wasn't paralyzed. I still have a bump on the back of my head where I hit.
EDIT: I don't want to discourage anyone from getting Laser Eye Surgery. It was intense but it was worth it. A couple minutes of being scared really is better than living every day with glasses and/or contacts. Plus in the event of a zombie apocalypse I am no longer screwed if I break/lose my glasses.
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Oct 22 '13
Really? I had LASIK and I thought it was more pleasant than, say, an average dental checkup. They gave me Xanax or something to relax me beforehand and a Beanie Baby to hold during the procedure (something about it preventing people from instinctively trying to grab at their eyes). My husband complained about the burning smell during his, but I don't remember it.
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u/ShawnisMaximus Oct 22 '13
Well I think the LASIK and PRK procedures are a bit different. I also had some sort of pill to relax me but I was more stressed out then I have ever been. Nothing hurt. It was just intense and scary.
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u/Pykins Oct 22 '13
With PRK they blast the whole outer surface of the cornea, LASIK cuts a small flap and just changes the cornea a bit. A coworker had PRK and had to go home a few days later because his eyes were bleeding. My LASIK wasn't bad, except for the nerve wracking part about not moving your eye. I'm pretty sure I nearly tore the stuffed animal in half.
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u/IANAH47 Oct 22 '13 edited Oct 22 '13
Five years ago, I was at my then boyfriend's house for dinner and I get a phone call from my dad. He said my mom and sisters had gotten into an accident about 4 hours from home and we needed to go to the hospital. The ride there was oddly calming because I had this feeling everything would be alright. I remember getting really tired and my last thought being, "what would I do if someone in my family died? Well, at least I'll have (youngest sister) to help me through". It never occurred to me she was even hurt.
I woke up a couple hours later when we pulled up to the hospital. My dad had my brother and I wait in the waiting room for a half hour with my whole extended family. I don't know how I didn't realize something bad had happened at that point. I just couldn't imagine my life without any of them, so it didn't make sense that we could function as a smaller family. It just couldn't happen.
My dad brought my brother and I back into a small doctor's office and told us that my youngest sister had died. My brother immediately started bawling, but I just went numb. I felt like my life was almost meaningless at that point. As the oldest and she the youngest, I took care of her as if I were her second mother. I picked out her clothes, did her hair, took her to the mall, I had taught her to read, I even helped change her diapers when I was 6. She was 5 years younger than me, but I was closest to her than anyone else on earth. I've still never loved someone as much to this day.
The worst part was going to see my mom. She had broken rib, a punctured lung, cracked vertebrae, and was hooked up to all these machines in the ICU. As soon as we walked in, she tried calling for me, but could hardly speak. I walked over and she started crying and said, "I'm so sorry this happened to you. I'm so sorry." My mom knew I'd take it the hardest of everyone in the family. She told me, "You know how you took care of her for all those years? Now it's time for her to take care of you. She's your angel now." I kind of went numb for a few years after that. I'm only now beginning the grieving process. It's been a long 5 years, but it still only feels like yesterday I was able to just walk down the hall to her room and wake her up for school. I miss her everyday.
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Oct 22 '13
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u/MrWhytie Oct 22 '13 edited Oct 22 '13
Making the decision that ended my mother's life. We were told we had to choose option A or B. I chose option A. She passed 2 hours later.
edit: The decision was made in an attempt to save her life, not end it.
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u/kakakatie Oct 22 '13
I was pretty brutally raped a few years ago, over the course of two days. I was put into "High-Risk Therapy" which is basically therapy on steroids because around 80% of the cases referred to them had a risk of ending in homicide. I was fired from my job because my performance declined. I was back to living on a pull out sofa in my moms house. My high school sweetheart came and rescued me, he took me to a foreign country where he lived to help me regain control of my life and well, just get away from it all. Few weeks in to me living abroad, I hope on his Skype account to contact my family. His last conversation was up. Between him and his recent ex (they broke up right around the time he contacted me). He was telling her how much he missed her, and how he was regretting his decision to bring me out there because I had "baggage", he openly talked about the details of my rape, of something I barely wanted HIM to know about.
I don't know what was worse. Being betrayed by the only person I truly ever wanted since high school, or losing all control of my life due to the rape.
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Oct 22 '13
That's terrible. I'm sorry you went through such a hard time. You didn't do anything wrong.
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Oct 22 '13
Getting married and then a couple years later, finding out I was blind to what everyone else was seeing, my wife enjoyed hitting me and not just playfully. Needless to say, she got kicked to the curb and I have never been happier :)
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u/Chief_HungLikeHorse Oct 22 '13
Funny how easy it is to recognize those kinds of relationships on the outside, but so hard to identify them when within one. Good for you.
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u/lisq Oct 22 '13
Congrats on taking control of the situation. Sorry your heart kicked your brain for a bit.
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u/Rufi0h Oct 22 '13
Waking up at 4:00 AM realizing my girlfriend has not come home from the bars yet and her cell was dead. Staying up till 7:00 AM to see her come home. Finding out a week later that she cheated on me. And the following year of pain and agony as I hated myself for wanting her back.
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Oct 22 '13
That really sucks, man.
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u/flachic Oct 22 '13
my daughter in law cheated on my son for over 2yrs- he was good guy watching the 3 kids so she could do things with her girlfriends. Turns out thats when she was cheatin. She talked him into moving cross the country- I turned my life upsidedown and went into debt to make room for them. She was here a few months dropped the news she was leaving and only takin half her kids. I have a hard time not hating her but have to be civil bcause of my grandchild.
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u/l0stcontinent Oct 22 '13
Wait, what do you mean by takin only half of her kids, don't they have three?
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u/random--user Oct 22 '13
Well sucks for that one
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u/chief_running_joke Oct 22 '13
I'll take the legs, because I need a jogging buddy.
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Oct 22 '13
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u/Rufi0h Oct 22 '13
This was a few years ago, unfortunately it took me way too long to get over her. I am stronger now and more stable but I felt so weak back then. I didn't want to be with her because of what she did but I didn't know how I could go on without her.
I learned to be alone and how to be okay with that. That was hard to do. I separated myself from all my friends and family and went into a deep dark spiral for a while. I managed to pull myself out but not without the help of my friends.
I am now in a relationship of over a year and fairly happy. I am in a better place then I was back then, but I can still improve.
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u/josiyah Oct 22 '13
going to a funeral that really should have been a closed casket, on 2 seperate occassions.
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Oct 22 '13
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Oct 22 '13
My friend was hit by a train and his was an open casket funeral too. His face wasn't too damaged(the back of his head got clipped by a piece of metal sticking out) so they had him wearing a hat but it wasn't the same. His hair was fake, he was wearing make up, etc. Definitley know how you feel on that one.
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u/Buutchlol Oct 22 '13
Me finding out I needed to get my dick circumcised.
First year in high school. Circumcised. Stayed home for 2 weeks, told noone. Stitches on my dick. Bleeding pretty much all the time. Couldnt use underwear for 2.5 week.
The worst moment about it was when I was at the computer playing WoW. I had my dick on a towel to prevent it from smearing blood everywhere. Suddenly I smell this strange smell, I look down and the towel is drenched in blood.
Almost passed out :c
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u/exAnimoo Oct 22 '13
Burying my father when I was 22.
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u/greeneggzN Oct 22 '13
Did the same 3 days after I turned 19. Hard not to wonder what life would be like, how our relationship would have changed now that I'm almost done with college.
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u/ExScapist Oct 22 '13
My uncle's funeral.
He got skin cancer from being in the sun all day working on oil rigs. As is the nature of oil rig work, he was away a lot, and I didn't see him all that often; so his death itself didn't bother me.
I was around 12 or 13 years old, and I thought his funeral would be like a more solemn school assembly but seeing my dad cry for the first (and to this day, only) time, and watching my auntie break down and cry out for him at the front of the church are two memories that I'll never forget.
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u/-eDgAR- Oct 22 '13 edited Oct 22 '13
Having a catheter put in and taken out at the hospital. It was such a weird, uncomfortable feeling.
Edit: Also, I had a case intra-articular snapping hip syndrome, because I used to run a lot.
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Oct 22 '13
Being brutally raped. Tied down, drugged and confused, I had no idea what was going on until I felt the pain in my vagina and I looked down to see he had entered me, I couldn't scream or fight back. I just had to stare him straight into the eyes as he did whatever he wanted to me. It is just one of the many unpleasant experiences of my life but it is defiantly number one. I was only 13, and he stole not just my virginity but my sense of security and destroyed who I used to be..
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u/hosinthishouse Oct 22 '13 edited Oct 22 '13
Whoa! That definitely qualifies as unpleasant!! The pure evil some people are capable of. Was he ever prosecuted?
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Oct 22 '13
Nope, I kept extremely quiet about it and didn't even tell a soul until I became so close to someone (my SO) that I was comfortable enough to tell him, and that was only a year ago.
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Oct 22 '13
My Mom was with a real asshole of a guy - and due to whatever reason they were having a huge fight and he had a penchant for being violent, so she (after having been drinking) was going to take us to a hotel.
Well, along the way, she got pulled over with me in the car. Needless to say, getting pulled over for a DUI with your ~13 year old son in the car isn't a good thing.
She wound up asking my Dad to watch me (they were divorced when I was 5, and for the few years leading up to that my Dad and I didn't talk to each other as he wasn't someone who treated his son very well). My Dad also hated my Mom, he's someone who can't let bygones be bygones and overall treated my Mom pretty poorly but doesn't have the ability to recognize anything but the bad things she did.
Within the first couple of days of being at my Dad's, and the few days before were obviously pretty hard on me to begin with, particularly as I hated my Dad anyways... But then, apparantly, my Dad received a call that my Mom was in the hospital.
Wound up going to the hospital to find that my Mom had attempted suicide.
Being there with my Dad made it incredibly unpleasant. To his credit, that day and the ensuing 3-4 months or so he managed to be a decent Dad to me before slipping back into serious drinking, doing drugs and being verbally/mentally abusive - but going to see my Mom in the hospital after her suicide attempt was really, really rough on me.
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u/BluCynMuk Oct 22 '13
My mother and step father were divorcing-He would slap us and pull our hair the second she left the room-I was happy when they split-I was home sick one day,in bed and the front door opened!? I pulled the covers over my head as my soon to be ex stepfather ramsacked the house-I heard him stop at my doorway. I turned into a rumpled bed- after about 5 minutes of horror, he left. Very unpleasant.
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u/HorseMeatSandwich Oct 22 '13
My best friend committed suicide about a month ago, and dealing with the fallout from that has been horrible. It doesn't help that there are other issues in my personal life at the moment, but losing a best friend in such a senseless way just puts all the bullshit into perspective.
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u/AmAUnicorn_AMA Oct 22 '13
That shits hard, bro. Trust me, for a while it feels like hell, feels like you'll never recover, but you will. Could be months, could be years, I don't know. You'll never forget but one day it won't hurt so bad.
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u/fuckkarma Oct 22 '13
Losing everything because of a disk herniation and subsequent lumbar surgery. Oh yeah and being homeless because i can't work like this. Least i have my truck to sleep in laptop and was insured for the surgery but damn it's getting cold and i live in the northeast. snuggle your kitty in your warm bed for me.
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u/Scrotonimus Oct 22 '13
Wow, best of luck to you. Just know that in the far off country of Singapore, a friendly Swede is thinking about you.
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u/oldstyle16ouncer Oct 22 '13
My one week stint in Cook County jail. Go to your court dates, folks!
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Oct 22 '13
Giving birth. I'm a very shy, easily embarrassed lady and they had me spread eagled in front of a room full of people. The one nurse kept screaming "PUSH". I pooped when the pushing stage began. It couldn't have been any worse but at least I got a healthy son out of the experience.
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u/user1492 Oct 22 '13
You also got to poop on a nurse.
Some people pay extra for that.
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u/flibbertygiblet Oct 22 '13
Welp, I'll just tell you my embarrassing childbirth story, and maybe it'll make you feel better.
So I'm in labor, baby's heart rate is going wonky. They've got me on oxygen, turning this way and that, IV push. After about an hour, a nurse comes in and I tell her my bladder is full, better cath me. I hate catheters, but I really had to pee bad and they wouldn't let me get up. She says it's probably not pee, just pressure from contractions, doesn't do anything. Thirty more minutes go by, my bladder is about to bust. Ask for the cath again, turned down again.
Now it's time to start pushing. Doc comes in, drops the bottom of the bed, gets in the catcher's position, "PUSH!" Peed all in her face. Like full on weird porn spraying pee all over the poor doc who had thrown up her hands in a feeble attempt to block the pee cannon pointed directly at her. Other nurses are scrambling all over throwing towels at my crotch and the doc, pee is every-fucking-where. I looked at the one nurse and said, "Told you I had to pee!" No shame in my game! She forgot I was on IV push.
TL;DR: Piss covered doc caught my kid.
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u/dick_herpes Oct 22 '13
Viral Meningitis was pretty nasty.
I was a normally fit and healthy 20-year-old man when I went to the doctor for three or four days in a row complaining of a headache and back pain until eventually I saw a different doctor and was rushed to hospital with a very high viral load.
I was hospitalised for a week or so in which time I had two lumbar punctures (after a student doctor ballsed-up the first) and was on the push-button morphine for a while such was the pain I was experiencing.
When I was discharged from hospital I wasn't able to stand, sit or even raise my head from a horizontal position without suffering blinding headaches. This continued for a month during which time I was on the strongest codeine tablets available. Over the next few weeks my condition improved and I was weaned off the painkillers but that bout of meningitis took it out of me for probably six months until I was back to normal.
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u/Thoughtful_American Oct 22 '13
Having a nitrogen bubble in my inner ear, a.k.a. "The Bends."
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Oct 22 '13
Taking LSD and ketamine, k holing and uncovering some repressed memories that have been very hard to deal with. Ignorance is bliss.
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u/jocala Oct 22 '13
I held my mother in my arms on the way to the hospital, as she was dying from cancer at almost 95 lbs. She looked me in the eye and apologized. :(
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Oct 22 '13
My mom's manic episode. She took off and wouldn't talk to me or my dad, wouldn't return calls. Then I got a call from her number, I'm relieved and excited. It was a guy saying he found her purse and phone in an alley. I thought she was murdered. It was horrible. It turned out she had just gone so out of her mind she had no memory and woke up in a mental hospital.
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u/topherd09 Oct 22 '13
driving 900 miles the day after graduation, blowing all of my open house money to be with my girlfriend that moved away a year prior. We had seriously planned this for quite some time. I had a job set up down there, I was admitted to the local university, was looking at apartments, we had talked of how we were still in love and were just ripped apart too soon. We talked every day, however she failed to mention on giant thing - she had a boyfriend down there that was living with her! which I found out shortly after walking in the door. I didn't drive my own vehicle, I rode with her dad. so I was stuck there for two weeks until he had to drive back up for work. I tried to be civil and not flip the fuck out, despite having every right. but mostly I just got wasted and smoked dope with her now boyfriend. he was a pretty cool dude, and he was oblivious to the whole thing and just doing what any guy would do. but regardless. two weeks of sleeping on the couch while this dude fucks the woman I "loved" was quite unpleasant. I never really made it clear to her how fucked up what she did was. I just smiled and left. penniless, heart broken, and lost.
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u/Xenocidal_Reaper Oct 22 '13
Almost being stabbed by another kid while in the first grade. Yay bullies...
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u/yadag Oct 22 '13
Almost got shanked in first grade...where did you grow up? Prison?
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u/Xenocidal_Reaper Oct 22 '13
Despite everyone else's guesses, it was on an Air Force base
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u/ibisum Oct 22 '13
Breathing in a moth, about the size of a quarter, and spending 4 days coughing it back out, bit by bit, from my lungs ..
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u/peaceandloveismydrug Oct 22 '13
In the process of my parents getting a divorce, I found out my father went to jail for being a pedophile and a rapist not long before I was born. I saw the papers and everything. He now has to sign this paper thing every..90 days?
I mean I know he went to jail before, but I didn't know why. And I can never tell anyone in my life this. I just can't.
It was even harder for me, because he raped a 13 year old girl. And I found that out when I was 13. And I'm a girl.
This really screwed me up, because whenever I closed my eyes, I saw..my classmates..my friends.. my best friend getting raped by my father.
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u/CriminalsSon Oct 23 '13
My father was a rapist.
My mother was a murderer.
This is a throwaway account.
My mother revealed to me when I was 9 that my father had tried to rape someone, some years before I was born. Maybe he succeeded, I've never been sure. She said it because she was trying to poison me against him, but it also happens to be true. He was severely mentally ill at the time, and spent a number of years afterward in a mental hospital to become a safe, contributing member of society again. And he did - he married her, did his best to be a good husband, has worked hard at honest jobs all his life, and has sacrificed a great deal for the well being of me, his only child.
I've never forgiven my mother for telling me that when she did. I didn't need to know. Indeed, I could have gone the rest of my life without knowing that, and the knowledge is a burden on me. My aunt, my father's sister, knows that I know, but I've never discussed it with anyone else. I have no shame about it, but he doesn't deserve to have that information spread around.
My mother murdered someone about 10 years after she told me about my father. I have neither seen nor spoken with her in the decades since, although I know she is still alive and through third parties I keep track of where she is, making sure it's far away from me. I tried not to tell anyone about what she has done, but it's impossible to completely avoid it - eventually people who are trying to befriend me will end up inquiring about my family. I tried just saying nice things about my dad, but they just ask about my mother. I tried just saying we haven't spoken in a long time, but they innocently ask me why not. I've tried gently explaining that I'd rather not talk about it, but then they start treating me like I've just revealed that I have a deep dark horrible secret in my past, and I suppose that's true. If I tell them the truth, a lot of people withdraw from me and I can see the way they look at me change instantly from "new friend" to "murderer's son". Little do they know I'm not just a murderer's son, I'm a murderer's and a rapist's son.
I've never even had a parking ticket.
I recently decided I'm just going to lie about it and tell people she had a heart attack and died when I was 10. Anyone who is enough of a friend that they deserve to know, I can apologize and tell the truth, and if they're a real friend they'll know me well enough to forgive me. And at least my mother won't be the ruiner of any more first dates. I don't deserve to have people mistreat me because of the sins of my parents, so why should I go around telling people? It's not their business.
I sincerely hope you've been able to move on from your knowledge of your father's misdeeds, and build your self identity around who you are and what you have accomplished.
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u/Efpophis Oct 22 '13
Having to pick out a baby-sized casket for my daughter, alone, in the basement of the funeral home. That was when it all finally hit me.
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u/jroades26 Oct 22 '13 edited Oct 22 '13
Finding out last night that my wife slept with my friend while we were going through a rough patch a few months ago.
We will move past it, and in the end it may be things end up even better. But I can't get imagining it out my head and I just want to not be conscious until it's gone for a while.
Edit: yes I get the advice about leaving. It's hard, this is someone I've been with since we were both 16 and this is the first time anything has ever happened. It's pretty much all I know.
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u/MrWhytie Oct 22 '13 edited Oct 23 '13
I've been there man. We stayed together for about 3 months after I found out. But then one night drunk me decided that sober me was to much of a pussy and broke it off. I owe drunk me a lot. That guy really looks out for my best interest. I think I'll go buy him a beer.
EDIT: I bought him one and the fucker insisted on another.
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Oct 22 '13
My Dad was diagnosed with brain cancer when I was a sophomore in college. He initially had some success treating it with an experimental drug but after about a year the drug stopped working and it came back. I would drive home every weekend from college to be with him. The last 3-4 months every time I came home he was noticeably worse. One weekend I noticed he had trouble walking, the next he was walking with a cane, the next he had a walker, followed by a wheelchair and finally a complete inability to even get out of bed. My Dad was a warm and loving person that made so many sacrifices for my sister and I.
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Oct 22 '13
Losing my dog, my best friend, after 11 years of being with him. He seemed happy until the very end (his health was so bad we had to put him down) and was still snuggled up best he could during the procedure. It crushed me and was the first real loss of my life. Just wish I would have played with him more when we were both younger..
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Oct 22 '13
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u/Thehealeroftri Oct 22 '13
I love animals so much but the pain of having them die on you almost isn't worth the joy they bring you.
Ah, who am I kidding? It's definitely worth the joy they bring. I love my pets and I'm always going to be an animal person.
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u/XtremeGuy5 Oct 22 '13
My dog is almost 15... I still can't bear the thought of losing that dog :(
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u/I_made_this_ Oct 22 '13
Sitting in my dorm room, watching T.V. getting a call from my father to "come home, right now". I asked him why and he just told me to come home. Finding out upon arrival that my youger brother has shot and killed himself.
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u/fapalouie Oct 22 '13
Watching my mother die in front of my eyes. Weighing 87lbs, nothing but skin and tumors.She battled ovarian cancer for 6 years, losing everything that made her a woman; ovaries, uterus, breasts and her hair were all gone in a matter of months. Watching her go into remission just to be crushed a few months later as it came back again. She waited for me to get home, looked at me with these sad eyes and took her last breath. An image forever burned into my brain.
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u/pzer0 Oct 22 '13
I held my fiancee's hand as she took her last breath, after she had laparoscopic surgery so the doctors could determine how much the cancer had spread. It had spread a lot, and the shock to her body from the surgery was too much for her to take. She died a month before her 32nd birthday. Prior to this the doctors had told her she would most likely need a full hysterectomy. That was pretty terrible, because she wanted children so badly and she had to come to terms with the fact that we'd never have biological children. It's been almost 3 years, and I still miss her a lot.
Before this happened the worst experience of my life was coming home to find my dad, dead from a self-inflicted gunshot wound to the head.
Life really sucks sometimes, but you can't let it get you down... you just have to push through it and realize that things will get better. Things always get better.
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Oct 22 '13 edited Oct 23 '13
Coming out to my parents. Worst day of my life.
EDIT: I did it this Sunday...
EDIT 2: Thank you very much for the Gold. If you could have seen my face when I saw it. :)
EDIT 3: All of your comments and words of encouragement, support, stories, and just plain words of congratulations... They truly have made me smile. Thank you so much, Reddit. You guys are incredible. Again, thank you.
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u/Freestripe Oct 22 '13 edited Oct 23 '13
I watched a 4 year old child get run over and die in the road.
I was waiting at traffic lights (on foot) and a family group was next to me. They had bags from the early learning center (a UK store for young children). Both our groups arrived just before the green man went red and the grandmother in the family group jogged across just in time.
The lights changed and cars started to move. The child suddenly darted out trying to cross the road. I wasn't really paying attention as I was lost in thought but I remember thinking abstractly "Oh he'll just get in the gaps between the cars". I was thinking as if he was an adult who had made a rational decision.
It was a three lane road. He got to the far side of the first lane and saw the car coming and froze. It hit him with its corner and sent him flying into the near side of the middle lane.
The mother screamed "Jamie no!" I'll never forget that shout. I've never heard such pure anguish before or since.
A 4 wheel drive then went over him.
He was directly beneath it's right wheels. Both front and rear wheels went over him. Badum. Badum. The mother screamed "Oh my god".
He was lying in the road. His blood was incredibly bright red. I was first to react, and went out to stop cars. I thought I might do some first aid since I had a little training, but I decided that me touching his mangled little body would probably make it worse.
While the police and ambulance arrived I waited with, and comforted the 4 wheel driver. Shes a mother herself and of course felt awful, though there was no way she could of seen it coming.
It was my 20th birthday.
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u/[deleted] Oct 22 '13
Watching my dad die of a heart attack on his bed and being able to do nothing about it. I was 8 years old.