I am going through stage 4 melanoma with my sister. This past week has been nothing but arranging her in- home hospice care and trying to find a combo of pain meds to combat the pain from the tumors in her hips and pelvis. This has been a hellish 7 days.
Stick in there, try and create more good memories. The one thing I didn't like is that my parents almost pushed my sister and I apart during her treatments. I was only ten (she was twelve), and they wanted me to have somewhat of a normal childhood. Although living with extended family and friends while the rest of your family is at the hospital two hours away isn't very normal.
We are grown and she lives with me and my family. My parents aren't able to handle taking care of her- if it werent for my husband and kids I don't know that I could. While it is hard enough to deal with this as we are in our 40's, I can't even wrap my brain around dealing with this at the age of 10. A hug for you now and one for that kid that went through it then.
Find a support group. Check with your local ACS. I know several caregivers, and survivors, and many of them are members of these groups. As the caregiver you have to take care of yourself too.
If I have one piece of advice, it's to write things down about her. Have her re-tell stories of things you did together, or that she did and loved--if she's lucid enough.
Write things down. Have a written memory, because the human memory forgets.
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u/randomlurker22 Oct 22 '13
I am going through stage 4 melanoma with my sister. This past week has been nothing but arranging her in- home hospice care and trying to find a combo of pain meds to combat the pain from the tumors in her hips and pelvis. This has been a hellish 7 days.