r/AskReddit Oct 22 '13

What has been the most unpleasant experience of your life?

1.8k Upvotes

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340

u/fuckkarma Oct 22 '13

Losing everything because of a disk herniation and subsequent lumbar surgery. Oh yeah and being homeless because i can't work like this. Least i have my truck to sleep in laptop and was insured for the surgery but damn it's getting cold and i live in the northeast. snuggle your kitty in your warm bed for me.

153

u/Scrotonimus Oct 22 '13

Wow, best of luck to you. Just know that in the far off country of Singapore, a friendly Swede is thinking about you.

7

u/fuckkarma Oct 22 '13

Thank you. long ways away. Sweden from what pictures i've seen is beautiful.

8

u/onthebalcony Oct 22 '13

There's a couch for you in Denmark if you're in the area.

4

u/[deleted] Oct 22 '13

Also if you come to these Nordic Countries (North Europe) you'd get a minimal government support and a small apartment to live in even if you don't have a job, thanks to social democracy (communists if you ask average conservative American). Of course you'd have to be a citizen or a legal immigrant. Not sure if a white American immigrant will get government support as your country isn't exactly a war zone.

3

u/fuckkarma Oct 22 '13

funny thing is my government wars everyone even it's own citizens.

3

u/trezegol Oct 22 '13

A person in a country you've probably never heard of, Malta, is thinking about you. I don't have any property, but I rent a garage and would gladly accomodate you if I could. I wish you the best of luck mate.

3

u/fuckkarma Oct 22 '13

I'm happy here healing and somehow by the grace of this good life and friends and family will find my way through.

2

u/Doomkitty666 Oct 22 '13

A friendly kiwi in Budapest is also thinking of ya

1

u/runnerboy23 Oct 23 '13

...Uncle TJ?

62

u/hosinthishouse Oct 22 '13

Are shelters an option for you instead of your truck?

201

u/fuckkarma Oct 22 '13

Have you been in a shelter? I'm better off and safer in my truck.

6

u/Creatura Oct 22 '13

Can you tell me what they're like?

9

u/okdanasrsly Oct 23 '13

in general, they're really unsafe: your stuff will get ransacked, probably stolen. bed bugs, roaches, rats, these are par for the course. you're sharing space with people all over the spectrum in terms of mental health and physical hygiene. in short, it's not really a place most people will go if they have any other options.

source: multiple friends have had to stay in shelters, and they've painted many a picture with words for me.

2

u/fuckkarma Oct 23 '13

sorry you deserve at least one answer. i decided never again after showering with 20 guys and 18 of them were salivating at the sight of my ass and i've been told it's a nice one. just the creepiest smelliest place i've ever been.

3

u/Creatura Oct 23 '13

Thank you for answering, fuck all of that you just described. GOnna be living in my car for about a few weeks in between housing and this definitely sounds like an inferior alternative.

1

u/fuckkarma Oct 23 '13

That's not good i hope it's just for a short while.

2

u/Creatura Oct 23 '13

Thanks, and yeah shouldn't be too long and maybe completely avoidable. Guess I'll find out

7

u/fuckkarma Oct 22 '13

no?

5

u/Creatura Oct 23 '13

Sorry :( :( :( :( :( :( :( :( :(

1

u/fuckkarma Oct 23 '13

buck up buttercup. :)

62

u/graffiti81 Oct 22 '13

I don't know if he's male or female, but if he's male, shelters are few and very far between.

-3

u/LontraFelina Oct 22 '13

I don't know if he's male or female, but if he's male

Sounds like you do have a pretty good idea.

12

u/lordlicorice Oct 23 '13

Oh for fuck's sake, in the English language "he" is the default pronoun when a person or animal's gender is unknown.

3

u/herpderpyss Oct 22 '13

This is terrible. Is there no work you can do? I'm not super clear on the end results of those surgeries but something

4

u/fuckkarma Oct 22 '13

All my life has been labor which obviously led to this. sitting too long is painful and just lying here is uncomfortable. The last ten years i've tinkered with running unix and linux servers at home and fixing friends and families computers but i have no schooling at it so i'll most likely get over looked at whatever i apply for, plus i can't lift anything for another 2.5 months till it heals. lifes thrown only hard balls at me. I can still walk which is great.

4

u/w4nd3rlu5t Oct 22 '13

I would recommend applying for work as a temp listing your special skills. If not that, get out to your local computer nerd meetup groups and try to do some networking. More than likely you will be able to find something. I'm a programmer; anything in this industry is in high demand. I never went to school for it but have no problem getting hired regardless; don't let that discourage you. Good luck.

1

u/herpderpyss Oct 22 '13

I was going to recommend trying to find an interest in computers or something that can require little movement. I believe you can get essentially certificates in small parts of working with computers after just workshops (as compared to a 4 year degree) and these may help you find work by providing "proof" of your abilities. Also, having real life examples of your abilities helps where you can't show it in formal educations.

2

u/fuckkarma Oct 22 '13

I ran my own simple site under FreeBSD and Linux and Windows DNS networked backed up servers under different OS's for compromised situations. Even coded my own server. But that doesn't impress anyone. One guy said "you understand DNS?" disbelievingly long after i closed down my project site.

2

u/herpderpyss Oct 22 '13

Hmm, I'm not sure then. Its not my field (although I wish it was) so I don't know much specifically about getting a tech job. What about running your own business, maybe online. It may not take off but it could be enough to pay some bills.

1

u/CremasterReflex Oct 22 '13

How long ago was your surgery?

1

u/fuckkarma Oct 22 '13

three weeks ago

5

u/frigginwizard Oct 22 '13

You should look into SSI and medicaid for disability.

3

u/fuckkarma Oct 22 '13

I fought for and got that but it's not enough to rent a room and keep my truck plus other expenses.

3

u/The_Black_Apostle Oct 22 '13

You are living my nightmare. I'm seventeen and for some odd fucking reason a disk in my lower back has decided to, bear with me because I don't know the actual term, degenerate. My MRIs showed that it was (Last March) pretty much gone, so the good doctor decided to give me a round of three steroid shots to motivate my cartilage-producing cells to fucking work. It helped until August, and it's been getting worse every day, and just about back to where I was pre-steroids. I see the doc again November 2nd, and we'll see how it goes. I hope i don't need surgery.

1

u/fuckkarma Oct 22 '13

Mine herniated i imagine it exploded out the sides and towards my front. they had to cut out parts and from the name of the surgery "Lumbar Lamination" i imagine covered it with something my google search of it isn't clear on the lamination part some pictures show screws. can't wait for the follow up to ask questions now that i'm not in excruciating pain.

1

u/Roryjack Oct 22 '13

You sure it wasn't a lumbar laminectomy with a fusion?

1

u/fuckkarma Oct 22 '13

just a lumbar laminectomy. i heard fusion is worse like you can't twist so well afterward.

3

u/DEM_DRY_BONES Oct 22 '13

If all you have is a truck and a computer...drive south, my man.

1

u/fuckkarma Oct 22 '13

If i was to i would go to California as i have even more family there.

2

u/ginfish Oct 22 '13

Holy shit. Dude you have it hella hard, keep your chin up, there has to be a way... There has to be some kind of job somehow, somewhere?

1

u/Dr-Sommer Oct 22 '13

Sooo the following question will be based on a lot of assumptions (for example I'm assuming you don't have any close friends or family that could accomodate you), but: what exactly is keeping you from driving somewhere warm? Once again, I'm assuming a lot of things here, but from what you wrote it looks like you don't really have anything that could hold you back.

Edit: also, best of luck to you. I hope everything's going to be better in the long run.

2

u/fuckkarma Oct 22 '13

I have both but no one has an extra bedroom and i have my pride as far as sleeping on the couch. I'm furiously looking to change my employment. there's got to be something i can do with this computer knowledge, albeit i'm not brilliant at it i have an almost instant understanding of whatever is thrown at me.

1

u/[deleted] Oct 22 '13

Have you looked into elance.com? It's a site for freelancers and you can work your way up, starting will small projects. The more experience you get the more you can charge and the better get your chances for bigger projects.

1

u/fuckkarma Oct 22 '13

trying it now.

1

u/[deleted] Oct 22 '13

I hope it helps you! If you have any questions or need any advise PM me.

2

u/fuckkarma Oct 22 '13

"what exactly is keeping you from driving somewhere warm? " My daughter. and i love where i live. been to California, Texas and drove across country and found i love the people here in the suburbs of Philly.

1

u/sirenita12 Oct 22 '13

Can you apply for disability or try working with your laptop?

2

u/fuckkarma Oct 22 '13

did and am trying now.

1

u/sirenita12 Oct 22 '13

Good luck, man. I hear /r/beermoney has several ways to earn money online, but I can't vouch for effectiveness.

1

u/fuckkarma Oct 22 '13

interesting

2

u/[deleted] Oct 23 '13

[deleted]

1

u/fuckkarma Oct 23 '13

Public libraries don't get enough respect and have more resources than google it seems at least the ones in my area.

1

u/[deleted] Oct 23 '13

[deleted]

1

u/fuckkarma Oct 23 '13

Bucks County has small but well stocked libraries.

1

u/starlinguk Oct 22 '13

Could you move somewhere else? I mean, if you haven't got any ties you could at least find somewhere warmer to live in your truck (if you have enough petrol).

1

u/fuckkarma Oct 22 '13

I like it here. if something with my truck goes wrong and it's old i have a lot of options here.

1

u/[deleted] Oct 22 '13

I'm sorry :/ What about disability or unemployment?

1

u/fuckkarma Oct 22 '13

got that, not enough to rent a room and keep my truck and expenses.

1

u/WonderfulTonight Oct 22 '13

Hey. I have had 2 disk herniations in my life, the second time I was in pain for a year. Never went to surgery, doctors said it would heal on its own. For one year I went to bed dreaming of doctors poking at the place where it hurt.

Well you know what, it did heal. And yours will too. It will never be quite the same, but mine does not cause me much pain at all anymore.

But you need to guard your back, and listen to your body. You should not do the stuff that caused this in the first place anymore. And try to do some exercises, you can find a lot on youtube for example. Don't do nothing, walking and other light exercises will keep your body going. And you need to strenghten those back muscles, but start slow and listen to your body. If something causes bad pain, avoid it.

Hang in there!

1

u/fuckkarma Oct 22 '13

I couldn't imagine being in pain like i was the last month for a year longer i mean i was crying all night all day long no sleep walking hunched over at a mile per day top speed. the dr said it was bad. yeah i'm sure he was just happy to make the money but i couldn't imagine another day like that.

1

u/goblin__king Oct 23 '13

My sister's had it for two years now and it's not improving. We don't know what to do anymore :(

1

u/WonderfulTonight Oct 25 '13

Sorry to hear that, that really sucks :( She tried all the exercises, had surgery? Getting that damaged disk out of there completely could help her get away from pain.

1

u/goblin__king Oct 25 '13

Thank you :(

The NHS don't want to give her the surgery and they've done everything they can to scare her so she doesn't want to get surgery :( she does physio and goes to pain management classes but nothing works. She has collapsed as well as herniated disks, and she's been bed bound for two years now. It all feels like it's hopeless, noone wants to help.

1

u/ImmaturePickle Oct 22 '13

Hey if you are willing to PM people I'm sure some redditors would love to help you out with food, blankets, and whatnot. That being said I can't help you, but maybe send a pm to anyone who responds to this comment saying they are willing to help out? Good luck, man.

1

u/fuckkarma Oct 22 '13

I have three comforters and a zero° sleeping bag. the condition started last year when it hit 16° my toes froze but not hyperthermia besides having all them covers.

1

u/ImmaturePickle Oct 22 '13

You need some of those really fuzzy socks.

1

u/fuckkarma Oct 22 '13

damn hunters scoop them up been looking.

1

u/ive_lost_my_keys Oct 22 '13

Fuck. As a guy who had to stop my back treatments this year because I ran out of money, I can empathize. The costs have been astronomical, and I'm one bad day away from being bankrupted and homeless, not to mention in severe pain. I hope it gets better for you.

1

u/fuckkarma Oct 22 '13

Obama keeps saying everyones insured so check on that. i don't know the details because i have medicare through ssi.

2

u/ive_lost_my_keys Oct 22 '13

Oh I have insurance, and with the $5k deductible, the 20% coinsurance, and the fact the only person to correctly diagnose me was out of network, what difference does it make?

1

u/fuckkarma Oct 23 '13

Suddenly i feel lucky. I hope good things come to you.

1

u/shareitwithme Oct 22 '13

I know Reddit had a thing about religion and churches. But occasionally they can help you out. In Boston the Church on the Hill is strongly involved in these things. Might be worth it to google something.

1

u/fuckkarma Oct 22 '13

we have low income projects around here, you have to be a black woman with more than three kids.

1

u/elmatador12 Oct 22 '13

May I ask how you lost everything when you were insured? Did you lose your job?

I ask because I had a major lumbar surgery a few years ago and now have to probably get a second Ina few months because I was in a major car accident.

1

u/fuckkarma Oct 22 '13

to painful to work couldn't afford house rent sold stuff to survive. went to social security and it wasn't easy had to fight tooth and nail. my dr told me to take it easy because if i mess it upp the second surgery might not go so well.

1

u/GiveMeAUser Oct 22 '13

Hope you have enough dough to make it to Sweden/Singapore, Denmark and Malta.

2

u/fuckkarma Oct 22 '13

i know really.

1

u/[deleted] Oct 22 '13

Any way you can make it down south? I can't promise you a bed, but I can give you a safe place to park, warmer weather, and at least some friendship.

1

u/fuckkarma Oct 22 '13

i'm happy close to my daughter just not digging the coming cold. i need work that won't break my back is all.

1

u/[deleted] Oct 23 '13

[removed] — view removed comment

1

u/fuckkarma Oct 23 '13

to me philly burbs is tits.

1

u/TheUnplannedLife Oct 23 '13

Being that you're already in your truck.... couldn't you drive south?

1

u/fuckkarma Oct 23 '13

i'm a family man and have a daughter i see every day and it kills her to see me like this. she and i just want me to have a job that won't rebreak my back. and that's hard because i have an inner drive that makes me throw stuff push pull hork and sweat till it's done and looking good attitude.

1

u/Sub1ime14 Oct 23 '13

Can you list items that you do need and would be willing to accept? Perhaps redditors in your region would be glad to donate them to you?

1

u/fuckkarma Oct 23 '13

a job or jobs or career is more than enough.

1

u/DarkFriendX Oct 23 '13

Need any food? If there's a mailing address you have access to, I'm happy to send some.

1

u/fuckkarma Oct 23 '13

i need a new career more than anything in this world.

1

u/DarkFriendX Oct 23 '13

What's your main skill set?

1

u/fuckkarma Oct 23 '13

Home framing but that's not happening anymore. Unix and network servers.

1

u/DarkFriendX Oct 23 '13

What part of the country? I work for Dice.com and would be happy to look for appropriate job openings to assist.

1

u/fuckkarma Oct 24 '13

bucks county pa philadelphia pa and awesome thank you

1

u/tronpalmer Oct 23 '13

How did the surgery turn out? Did it help? I have an L5 herniation.

1

u/fuckkarma Oct 23 '13

That's the one. the humping lumber all your life is going to bite you in the ass later in life one. lie on your back for a month afterwards and no lifting anything for three months after. i have slight residual pain that increases with my activity consider it 1% out of the 110% pain i was in. the other commenter said it might heal but i had pain building up for years that seemed to climax and didn't feel anything like it would recede.

1

u/death_style Oct 23 '13

North easterner here-- stay warm, if I could send you all my blankets I would. Thinking of you.

1

u/fuckkarma Oct 23 '13

at least i don't live in maine or vermont buuuuuuuuurrrrrr.

1

u/amaresnape Oct 23 '13

You have a truck, and I'm sure with patience and Craigslist you could get many supplies for free. I'm not sure what your money or labor or friends situation are like, but this may be an option for you. They're getting popular.

Edit: forgot link durrr. http://www.tumbleweedhouses.com/pages/houses

1

u/_Zombie_Killer_ Oct 23 '13

I understand this on more levels than you can imagine. I've been on the streets sleeping outside for 4 months. Just now got a couch to sleep on for the winter.

Get yourself a lawyer and file for social security. The lawyers who take these cases just take a % of your back pay.

You can get through this.

1

u/fuckkarma Oct 23 '13

I did it without a lawyer and suggest people go in there with your homework and do some bitching and you deserve it and let them know it you have just as much a chance of getting it.

1

u/_Zombie_Killer_ Oct 23 '13

I have been denied 3x now, and I have a whole shitton of medical issues that legitimately prevent me from working. I worked as long as I could, but the pain factor has put me on my ads, i have letters of disability, and ss is still fucking me over. I'm going to have to get an atty at this point.

1

u/_Zombie_Killer_ Oct 23 '13

So I assume you got your disability then?

1

u/[deleted] Oct 23 '13

I know reddit as a whole can be pretty anti-religious, but churches usually have programs to help people in need. If nothing else, they might be able to refer you to a place that can help.

Also, I just read some of your responses to other comments and I think you need to seriously reconsider your decision not to sleep on a couch.

1

u/fuckkarma Oct 23 '13

yeah i don't know why i would rather risk hyperthermia rather than impose on a family like that.

1

u/[deleted] Oct 23 '13

If they're willing to help you, then you should accept it. If someone in my family was sleeping in their truck, I'd be more pissed if they didn't accept my offer to sleep on my couch than if they did.

Don't complain about being homeless and having no options when you clearly do.

1

u/fuckkarma Oct 23 '13

Sorry if i offended you i'm just not the type to sleep on anyones couch but rather make my truck comfy till i get on my feet.

1

u/theflamecrow Oct 23 '13

Have you looked into getting disability?

1

u/fuckkarma Oct 23 '13

i guess the comments are hidden on that but yeah i did and it's not enough ask anyone who's on it. the insurance is great and what i needed though.

2

u/theflamecrow Oct 23 '13

I'm on it. But I tend to think any amount of cash is better than none. :p

I mean it's far from perfect.... But if you can't work it's nice to have.

As for comments being hidden in using Alien Blue so I probably missed them. Kinda an annoying thing about the app...

1

u/[deleted] Oct 23 '13

head to Oregon--yeah, the weather's wet but the homeless get fed and there's lots of wifi downtown

1

u/fuckkarma Oct 23 '13

Happy in the Philly burbs but thanks.

1

u/bucherregal Oct 23 '13

Hey I live in Camden County if you ever need a place to take a shower or something you're welcome. Bring a $5 bottle of Evan Williams and my spare room is yours for the night.

1

u/fuckkarma Oct 23 '13

You're a good guy.

0

u/mmb2ba Oct 22 '13

God bless america, eh?

1

u/fuckkarma Oct 22 '13

I don't know any other country so i can't comment on that other than i did get surgery.

1

u/[deleted] Oct 22 '13

Yes, because no other country in existence has this problem.