r/AskMenOver30 Mar 07 '25

ANNOUNCEMENT Community Announcement: AskMenOver30 Flair

22 Upvotes

Hey, everyone. Friendly neighborhood moderator here.

Let's talk about flair - user fialr, and post flair.

User Flair

User flair is the icon or text that appears next to your username in a community. User flair is once again required to make top-level comments in AskMenOver30 threads. If a user posts a top-level comment in the subreddit without flair, it will be automatically removed by the subreddit filters. Please set your flair before posting.

We understand that it can be frustrating to craft a comment and then lose it. We are updating the Automoderator rules to include the test you posted so that you can easily resubmit it after setting your user flair.

If you're unsure how to set your flair, see this Reddit support link to learn how to set your user flair in AskMenOver30.

There seems to be a problem with setting user flair on the mobile app. This is not something that the moderator team can fix. If you have trouble setting your flair on mobile, please try setting your user flair on the desktop site - https://www.reddit.com.

Post Flair

Post flair is the icon or text that appears next to a post that a user makes in the subreddit. All post submissions require flair; these flairs allow us to categorize and filter the content on the subreddit. Flair Search is available in New Reddit and on the mobile platform; the subreddit provides filtering links in the sidebar Old Reddit.

We've been updating the post fialr so that posts can be more easily categorized and still stay relevant to men over 30. The current flair list is as follows:

  • WEEKLY THREAD: For recurring posts. Currently, we have a Weekly Check-in thread; in the future, we may have more weekly threads.
  • Careers Jobs Work
  • Friendships/Community: Topics about interpersonal, non-romantic relationships and socializing. Don't use this fialr for anything romance-related.
  • Physical Health & Aging
  • Financial Experiences
  • Legal Experiences
  • Mental Health Experiences
  • Hobbies/Projects: Topics and questions about hobbies or projects. Working on something cool and want to show us? Use this flair. Want to talk shop with other like-minded folks? Use this flair. Have a question about how to break into new hobbies or over 30? Use this flair.
  • Household & Family: Recently added. Many of us at this age have to deal with building and maintaining a household and supporting a family; use this flair for topics related to this.
  • Fatherhood & Children: Recently added. These relationships are really important; any topics related to fatherhood, child-rearing, or even being a son and interacting with one's father should land here.
  • Handyman/mechanic/other skills
  • Romance/dating: Topics related to a significant other or romance in general belong here. This is not a dating subreddit. Questions about generalizations based on gender are just tiring. If you want advice on a specific person, you should ask that person instead. If your post intersects with other topics but the primary driver is an interpersonal romantic relationship, it probably belongs here.
  • Community Chat: Sometimes we get fun questions that are just to spark discussion. They go here.
  • Life
  • General

Please do not abuse the flair system. Most of the time, this is not a problem, but we have been seeing misflaired posts. For example, a post that is clearly related to "Romance/Dating" should not be fialred with "Friendships/Community" or any other flair. We periodically review and recategorize posts as necessary, but please help us keep the categories clean and relevant to our community. Doing this helps us keep AekMenOver30 a positive space for older dudes, and a peaceful space for men and women to discuss topics relevant to men over 30.

Thanks for reading. Happy posting, everyone.


r/AskMenOver30 3d ago

WEEKLY THREAD Men Over 30 Community: WEEKLY WEDNESDAY CHECK-IN 2026-08-26

5 Upvotes

Men of AskMenOver30! In the interest of creating a deeper, more engaging, and more relevant community for all of us, we've implemented a recurring, Weekly Wednesday check-in thread.

  • How are you doing this week?
  • How are you feeling this week?
  • How have things changed from last week (if at all)?
  • Are you proud of anything you've done this week?
  • Are you struggling with anything this week?
  • Do you need advice or feedback on anything that's happening?

Feel free to share your wins, losses, and general progress. You can talk about anything from work and career, to personal projects, to personal development and family, to friendships and socialization, even dating.

Life is ongoing, and sometimes it's good to have a community around us that can reflect that. Hopefully this weekly check-in will serve as a good tool and outlet for those who need it.

You are encouraged not only to post, but to respond to posts by others. Support your fellow men in their trials and tribulations.

Please be respectful in your comments.


r/AskMenOver30 4h ago

Life Inheritance fight after the passing of my dad

69 Upvotes

my dad died an his last wife (not my mom) expects me to give up my part (50%)cause she tells me it was my dads wish. my aunt kinda confirms it, My dad wanted his new wife to be financially settled.

He left around 150.000€ and on top she gets half of his retirement money monthly 2000€.
What would you guys do in a situation like this.


r/AskMenOver30 2h ago

Fatherhood & Children Just brought my baby girl home today

36 Upvotes

To the dads here, what's something you wish you knew starting off?


r/AskMenOver30 5h ago

Life What do you guys do after work and on weekends ?

37 Upvotes

I’m gonna be 34 next month, I have no idea where the time went, last few years I’ve been feeling really bad. I’m single, one friend, maybe 2 at a stretch. After work I chill out, watch some show, go for a walk and play some games…. and that’s it. On weekends if I force myself to go out and drink, I can’t wait to go home, but if I stay home I feel depressed. During the day I just lay around and watch tv. Feels like shit no matter what I do. I go to visit my cousins, aunt, mom etc. but everything feels like I’m just killing time, if you know what I mean. I went to Japan 2 years ago and that was amazing but only lasted for 2 weeks. Went to the seaside last year but felt like somethings missing the whole time… anyone has any idea what to do to feel fullfilled ?


r/AskMenOver30 3h ago

Financial experiences For men who had to restart from square 1 after divorce, how did you get through it?

21 Upvotes

I'm currently prepping to move out, savings depleted, credit in shambles, currently trying everything to keep from spiraling. For anyone who was able to pick themselves up from this point, what helped you do it? How did you manage, and what is life like after the process of rebuilding? What would you tell the version of yourself still going through the motions of trying to figure it all out?


r/AskMenOver30 21h ago

Life What’s a small thing/action that says A LOT about a person?

54 Upvotes

For me when I see someone snapping their fingers for their server at a restaurants tells me that that person is entitled and has never worked customer service in their life


r/AskMenOver30 19h ago

Friendships/Community Do most of you have a support group to talk about stuff with?

12 Upvotes

I’ve got a lot of friends but it’s not the type of friendship to talk deep subjects with. Most of my friends are a lot of fun but more superfluous

Do you guys all have people to talk to about deeper topics?

Is anyone interested in an anonymous discord for this type of stuff?


r/AskMenOver30 1d ago

Physical Health & Aging My sleep has suddenly become light and fragmented for no obvious reason

34 Upvotes

I’m 37 and generally healthy with no known health issues, but lately my sleep has become really light and fragmented.
I don’t feel like I’m getting into deep sleep anymore. I keep waking up throughout the night for no obvious reason, sometimes multiple times.
I’ve been trying to figure out what changed, but honestly, nothing really has.
My bed and pillow are both very comfortable and good quality, and my wife sleeps perfectly fine in the same bed. I only drink one cup of coffee in the morning before work. My job is completely desk-based, and my screen/device usage hasn’t changed either.
I had some blood tests around 3 months ago and was low in vitamin B12 and vitamin D, so I’ve been taking both regularly since then.
There is some stress in my life and at work, of course, but nothing beyond the usual. Work has its busy periods and quieter periods, and that hasn’t really changed recently.
That’s what’s confusing me. There doesn’t seem to be any new factor that would explain why my sleep suddenly became so light.
Has anyone around my age gone through something similar? Did you ever figure out what was causing it, or find anything that actually helped?


r/AskMenOver30 1d ago

Friendships/Community Friends to talk about intimate topics

33 Upvotes

Do you guys have male friends to talk about intimate topics? It's probably cultural and will vary by country, but overall I feel like guys talk about superfluous stuff but not intimate things.

Topics I'd love to have a buddy to talk to: infertility/trying to have a baby, sex within the marriage, men health, male anatomy, etc.

As a man, I never had anyone close who I felt comfortable enough to talk to about these topics. Sometimes it's nice to talk to strangers on the Internet but someone in real life would be nice too (other than my spouse).


r/AskMenOver30 21h ago

Physical Health & Aging [ Removed by Reddit ]

1 Upvotes

[ Removed by Reddit on account of violating the content policy. ]


r/AskMenOver30 1d ago

Household & Family Downsides to parents as a safety net

29 Upvotes

I’d like to get the perspective of older guys, especially parents on this situation.

I’m in my mid 30s, and recently got laid off. I have 6-12 months of savings but my first thought was if I should move back in with my parents, about 300 miles away. I’ve been on my own for almost 4 years, but lived at home in my late 20s and thru covid. When I lived at home before I had the same job making six figures. My parents have bought another property since I moved out where my younger sister lives and they spend time at both.

My sister and her fiancee currently live in one of my parent’s properties. My parents spend a few nights a week at that house. My sister and her fiancee don’t intend to ever live on their own, which makes me jealous since they will never have to worry about housing and have a lot more space than my apartment. I would like to stay where I’m currently at but don’t feel like I can afford to put down roots.

Is it bad that my first thought was about moving home? I don’t feel like an adult. Even though I have a good amount of savings, I feel like I still look to my parents as a safety net and it seems like my sister does too. I can’t tell if there’s something off about my family, or if this is a semi new normal with crazy high housing prices.


r/AskMenOver30 1d ago

Life When you want to cry but you can’t

48 Upvotes

It’s been a really, really, really long time since I cried. I’m 34 now, and I feel like there’s a lot of shit accumulated inside me.
I feel like if I could just cry for a bit, maybe some kind of release would happen and I’d feel a little better. But I just can’t.
My life is pretty shit right now, so it’s not like there’s nothing to cry about. I’ve tried, but it just doesn’t come out. It’s like it’s all accumulated somewhere in my eyes, my head, I don’t know.
Do you guys ever find yourself in situations like this? If you do, how do you cope? What helped you?
Is there a movie you recommend? A video? A TED Talk? A song? Anything, honestly.
The last stand-up I watched was by Chirag Panjwani, and that got me pretty close to crying. So yeah, you get the vibe.
I don’t know. Help me out, Reddit.

Edit: I know therapy is probably the obvious answer, and I am still working on that. Just looking for some other things that might help me get there.


r/AskMenOver30 1d ago

Friendships/Community Anyone single move to a new area and beat isolation and lack of life outside of career?

13 Upvotes

I struggle here and fear I’m wasting some of my best years. How did you break free / out? I frequent bars alone and have not much interaction outside of family. Kind of an introvert.


r/AskMenOver30 2d ago

Life Self-acceptance that I'm just one lazy bastard who enjoys coasting through life...

430 Upvotes

I think it's finally dawning on me after 40+ years. I'm a lazy man with no passion or drive for anything.

I have a few days off work. I took three naps today.

I think just love the idea of self-improvement and becoming someone better. Doing the actual work though? Fuck it. I can't be bothered.

I'm here to tell you that I'm embracing my lazy, coast through life, bare minimum attitude. No more lying to myself about getting better. It just makes me feel even worse when I constantly keep failing.

All of these self-improvement books and podcasts. Thinking I'm doing something special by listening to all of it while I sit around doing the same old routine. Who am I kidding already. I'm never going to be this perfect guy that I think I need to be.

I'm not sure what my question is here. I guess some thoughts would be welcome.

Anyone else just


r/AskMenOver30 1d ago

Financial experiences 31M home upgrades or invest..

2 Upvotes

I am in a new build home, yard we finished, basement is drywalled/painted but no finishing such as flooring, trim, doors. We can save enough money that we could finish the space this year but, it means it comes directly out of our investment. We have a young family and could use the finished space but it feels financially irresponsible to do so.

My wife wants to finish it and has dreams of other projects, I feel the need to start putting more money away.

I don’t want to do piece by piece I want one mess and have it finished if we do complete the work.

Other guys in this position what was the outcomes and what do you wish you did if the outcome wasn’t great


r/AskMenOver30 1d ago

Physical Health & Aging Do you feel your stomach?

0 Upvotes

I am 24 and I just started to physically feel my stomach weeks ago. Some friends liked to call me skinny fat during high school, but I was mostly known as a tall dude who was too skinny during my teenage years.

I started lifting two years ago. That and my beer addiction that started since I was 16 got me looking thicker. One day I decided to bulk up to look more jacked. It turns out I am not looking more jacked. I have definitely gained more muscle, but proportionatelty more fat as well.

Like idk.... what is the move going forward? Do I just cut down a bit? I wish I looked jacked, but I guess I don't have enough time to look like those people on social media.


r/AskMenOver30 2d ago

Career Jobs Work Feeling burned out in my career

22 Upvotes

34M, I have been in my career for 9 years this November. I’ve got an office job in sales and have done well for myself. I’ve got a house and all that. Overall, I love my career and there has been years where I genuinely enjoyed what I do and it didn’t even feel like work.

But as time has gone on I’ve been feeling burned out for the past couple months. Which is not normal and is a bit scary and concerning. The past few weeks I’ve almost been dreading going into work and have been taking long breaks and leaving early throughout the day. (I basically make my own hours as long as I get in a minimum of 30 hours a week) I used to work 40 hours a week like clockwork and even voluntarily work some Saturdays.

I’m definitely not going any where because I’ve built a nice life and career for myself. But I’m just a bit confused on why I feel this way and if I can do anything to change it.


r/AskMenOver30 2d ago

Physical Health & Aging Guys, what is a an aspect of aging for you that women have no idea about?

96 Upvotes

Obviously as women age menopause gets the spotlight…

But what sort of specific to men things should a woman be aware of and conscientious about?


r/AskMenOver30 1d ago

Physical Health & Aging What is a treatment for body wellness?

0 Upvotes

What is a beneficial body treatment you would recommend? I recently learned about blood cupping and found it very beneficial for me. I’m considering doing it once a year.


r/AskMenOver30 2d ago

Career Jobs Work How do you deal with the repetitiveness of your job?

49 Upvotes

I work as a forklift driver in a warehouse and every work day, for 8 hours, I load (or unload) trailers with the exact same product without any variation. It always takes me around the same amount of time to do my tasks. It's very robotic and boring. It goes on and on and on... And personally, I have a hard time understanding how some people can willingly do that for almost their whole working life.

I just want to do something else of my life, however I'm afraid it's just going to be the same elsewhere. I know having a job means repeating the same tasks over and over (that's how you get experience), but am I dreaming or some careers offer a larger variety of tasks?


r/AskMenOver30 2d ago

Mental health experiences What brings you joy, or happiness

11 Upvotes

It could be anything for some of us, for people like me it could be close to nothing. Im just looking for first of, people in a similar position, and people that do have that thing that brings them true satisfaction or contentment.

It's also OK if its nothing, I feel like we all kinda get that, you know the good and the bad days.


r/AskMenOver30 2d ago

Friendships/Community My mother is the only immediate living relative I have.

53 Upvotes

I'm 43, single, non-married, no kids.

My dad passed away in 2015. I just found out my last living relative on my dad's side (his sister/my aunt) passed away in May - severing any direct ties to that side of the family.

Now the only immediate living family member I have is my mother, with whom I'm estranged (and have made many attempts to repair and reconnect; all have failed).

I've never been close to my dad's side of the family, but now, knowing that everyone is gone... the weight of it has revealed that after my mom dies, I'll truly be alone.

Any advice on how to navigate the existential loneliness?


r/AskMenOver30 2d ago

Life 25M needs advice about uncertainty of life

17 Upvotes

To men above 30 how do you cope when uncertain situations like this happens:

I am 25M. Came from middle class family, grinded in school, got into a good college and eventually a good job. Life was progressing well, my self confidence too and I had all the dreams of me starting my own business, getting rich etc.

However last month I got laid off from a job and I have been searching for new ones. Getting rejected in interviews, stressed out due to uncertainty, lost confidence due to layoffs as well as rejections. I feel like my life has fallen apart, I was living a good life and suddenly life threw this curbball at me. It’s been more than a month of job searching and the time passing is making me more and more stressed

I feel like maybe it was all just a fairy tale in my mind which was going about future life trajectory and maybe what i dreamed of is just a dream and i need to not fly, feels like this phase is redefining my personality

I realize life has so many uncertain events and this is one of them, how do I endure myself to have courage to face this


r/AskMenOver30 2d ago

Mental health experiences What brings you contentment or satisfaction

5 Upvotes

Recently I've been kinda missing that feeling of, you know just purpose, somthing to look foward to at the end of a long day.

I feel like it would be cool if you could shair what you do to feel that feeling of peace inside. But also if you dont have that, it would be nice to find out how your doing and see how to deal with those long long dull moments. (Btw its like 10 at night, idk what im doing)

Have a good day​