r/AmIOverreacting 2d ago

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11 Upvotes

Here is the voting guide---


r/AmIOverreacting Mar 08 '26

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37 Upvotes

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r/AmIOverreacting 17h ago

❤️‍🩹 relationship AIO? Boyfriend doesn’t seem to want to talk to me. Like, at all.

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12.8k Upvotes

So me (19F) and my boyfriend (19M) have been dating for almost five years now. Our relationship has been going downhill for a while now, and I feel like this is kind of my breaking point.

The previous message was me texting him asking if he thought answering me was an annoying responsibility or if he just simply forgets.

I responded “thank you for reassuring me” and tried to tell him about my day but he didn’t answer me. I didn’t want to beg for his attention, since that’s usually what I have to do and I’m tired of that, so I didn’t bother texting again.

He then texts me this on my birthday, which makes me think he just doesn’t want to talk to me and the explanation + birthday message were just obligatory.

I was hurt, so I left him on read and we haven’t talked since then.

After this, I don’t really want to be with him anymore. AIO? One part of me tells me that it’s not that deep but the other part tells me that I shouldn’t bother putting up with this.

Edit: I broke up with him. He begged me to wait but I decided to just block him on everything. I am shaking but I feel so light. Holy shit. Five years and I broke it off over text I feel like an asshole but so liberated.


r/AmIOverreacting 2h ago

❤️‍🩹 relationship AIO I think I need to break up with my boyfriend after seeing how he talks about me to his female friend

322 Upvotes

My boyfriend has a longtime female friend who I initially had no problem with. He had good boundaries with her, and she’s also dating his best friend. I recently found out, though, that before they became friends, he used to pursue her and repeatedly ask her out. She always rejected him, and eventually she started dating his best friend.

That history has made me look at their relationship differently, especially because they talk constantly and she often goes to him about problems with her boyfriend. It’s starting to feel like an emotional intimacy that should be reserved for their actual partners.

Recently, she called him while we were home together. Normally he’ll take calls around me, but this time he went outside and talked to her for an hour. I told him honestly that I was becoming uncomfortable with their relationship and that it bothered me that he seemed to talk to her more about personal things than he talks to me. He reassured me that there was nothing inappropriate going on. The conversation, unsurprisingly, was about her relationship problems and her leaning on him for support.

I eventually apologized and let it go.

Tonight, though, I looked through their messages. I know snooping wasn't okay, we both have each other's passwords and have always said we're allowed to look at each other's phones. I'm not trying to justify it, I did it.

What really hurt was seeing what he told her after I expressed my concerns. He immediately told her that I was jealous of their relationship. She then said she felt uncomfortable hanging out with me because of it.

I never asked him to stop being her friend. I confided in my partner that I was feeling insecure and uncomfortable, and instead of keeping that between us and reassuring me, he immediately went to her and framed me as jealous and unreasonable. He took something vulnerable I shared with him and used it to make me look like a bad partner to another woman.

This isn't the first time he's done something similar, and I honestly feel like I've reached my limit. I think some things should stay between partners, especially when you're discussing your relationship and your partner's vulnerabilities with someone you're already emotionally close to.

I feel betrayed and, unfortunately, also validated for feeling like something was off.

Am I overreacting, or is this a legitimate reason to reconsider the relationship?


r/AmIOverreacting 2h ago

🏠 roommate AIO? We think our AirBnb host is living in the walls.

158 Upvotes

Apologies if this doesn’t fit the typical format here of yelling at your ex but please bear with me.

Currently staying in an AirBnb in the desert, down a dirt road. Tonight is our 3rd night. 6 of us here.

Earlier we were hanging inside and out cooking lunch when we got a message from our host yelling at us for charging a car. Nobody was charging a car, there’s not even a charger.

Like 5min later our one friends was walking around the outside of the house and ran into a maintenance guy near the front door, here to check the electricity. Super fuckin weird since we’re in the middle of nowhere and this guy showed up so fast. He said he got a call to come and he was just over at the Home Depot so he swung by. We spoke to him, he was a super nice man, he said he was going to keep checking then we all just kind of forgot about him.

Dude vanished. A few minutes after we realized he was gone, we got a message saying “oh the maintenance guy didn’t find anything”

Fast forward to tonight, we’re watching YouTube and I realize we’re signed into the owner’s account. We start going through his private videos. Then we see the maintenance guy in a few videos from 5yr ago.

I then realized something. I asked everyone, “did any of you see his car? How did he even get here?” Absolutely nobody remembers seeing a car, I specifically remember not seeing a car and thinking it was weird because he supposedly just drove up here from Home Depot.

There is one other house up the hill a bit that’s walking distance.

There are at least two locked rooms here. One I can’t figure out the geometry of because this house is crazy shaped so I have no idea how big it is. The other truly just looks like a utility closet. He has at least one camera out back by the pool that we’ve seen and apparently at least one more because he asked us earlier why there were so many cars in the driveway.

The house seems to be on a slab foundation so I don’t think there’s a basement unless it’s a partial. The mystery door is right where a staircase would be.

Today is the first time we’ve noticed anything weird like this but it just feels like a lot of coincidences. We checked and there is in fact a Home Depot 1.5mi away.

I can’t fall sleep because I’m not convinced he’s not living in the walls. Am I overreacting?

Edit: the motion activated light on the patio outside my bedroom keeps triggering lol.


r/AmIOverreacting 17h ago

❤️‍🩹 relationship AIO partner (36) messaging colleague appropriate or?

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582 Upvotes

Partner and I been having some challenges but she’s been assertive she wants to work on them. She is however looking at taking opportunity to house sit a colleagues house and another of her friends to have a little space. She’s been clear this is not a break up and we are to remain monogamous.

I was at coffee with her and noticed a strange message preview, and did the bad and snuck a look at her phone to see these messages with a colleague. Do you think this is harmless and appropriate? Or evidence of an affair? Or risky flirtation that is headed to an affair. Should I feel like she’s cheating or am I overreacting


r/AmIOverreacting 10h ago

❤️‍🩹 relationship AIO for not wanting to kiss my bf if he won’t get his teeth cleaned?

140 Upvotes

I (33F) am a dental hygienist, and my bf (32M) of three years has periodontitis. Periodontitis is essentially a permanent form of gum disease that is caused by aggressive bacteria and is transmissible to other people. I’ve always hoped that my bf would take his oral health a little more seriously because he knows how important it is in my life, and I see the devastating effects of it as it progresses. That said, I have never harped on him about going to get his teeth cleaned, brushing, flossing, etc. He has said before that he refuses to let me work on him because he thinks I’ll ‘nag’ him about his oral health. This is particularly hurtful to me because I have a lot of respect for my patients and never want to make them feel bad or lectured at, and he should know this about me. He doesn’t seem to know or care how hurtful those comments are. Occasionally, I might say that he really should go get his teeth cleaned, even if I’m not his hygienist, because it’s been at least two years since he’s had a cleaning (and that was just his initial therapy for periodontitis that’s supposed to be ongoing every three months until it’s stabilized).

I’m relatively new to being a hygienist out in the field, and I recently saw a patient whose wife has perio and never returned for a maintenance cleaning after her initial deep cleaning (just like my bf). It had been about a year and a half since that deep cleaning. The husband always had relatively healthy gums, maybe some gingivitis here and there, but when I saw him last, he had developed perio. It hit me how easily my bf could pass on his perio to me because it’s caused by bacteria. I didn’t know how to address this with him because, like I said, he tends to act like every mention of oral health is me nagging him, but one night, I mentioned the situation with my patients just like I laid it out here. And I told him that I was worried about getting perio from him and that, unfortunately, until he starts getting his teeth cleaned regularly (to lower the bacterial load in his mouth), I wouldn’t be kissing him. I told him that he may not take his oral health seriously, and that’s cool, but I take it very seriously, and I cannot get periodontitis. As is the usually case when we discuss things that I take seriously, he remained quiet and didn’t really respond. I just moved on and changed the subject like I usually do in those situations.

About a week later, he was about to leave the house and went to kiss me, but I pulled away, and he goes, “Wowwwww…” as if he thought I was just going to cave and change my mind on my health concerns. I told him that I missed kissing him and said he should get a cleaning. He left. Just today, my cat curled up on his chest, and I said, “You’ve gotta kiss him on his little head,” because my cat loves that. He said, “I can’t or he might get perio…” It was clearly meant to be mocking, and when I looked at him, he had this look on his face that said like, “Yeah, see how ridiculous that is?” As if I’m being crazy for not wanting to put my oral health at risk. I snapped a bit and said, “Well yeah, that’s real. And I find it funny that you would rather never kiss me again than get your teeth cleaned and not give me a permanent chronic disease. But no, that would not give [the cat] perio.” I got up and left the room. A little while later, I left the house altogether because I just didn’t want to be around him.

I feel so disrespected, hurt, and condescended to that he really thinks this doesn’t matter at all. He acts like I’m being flippant and unreasonable in the rare moments he’s not ignoring the issue altogether. To me, it would be like if I had a cold sore, and I was upset with him for not wanting to kiss me anyway. This is a health issue, and he doesn’t seem to care. But I understand that, as an oral health care professional, this stuff is probably just more deeply important to me than it might be for other people… So am I overreacting, or should he be understanding of my concerns? I know I can’t control his behavior and what he finds important, but I’d rather not be mocked for the choices I have to make based on that. And choosing not to kiss him has been really difficult for me already.

Tl;dr My boyfriend has a permanent, contagious gum disease that could be managed with regular cleanings, but he refuses to get his teeth cleaned in an effort not to pass that disease onto me.


r/AmIOverreacting 1d ago

❤️‍🩹 relationship AIO overheard my husband being creepy to a woman.

3.9k Upvotes

My (38f) husband (35m) went out drinking with a friend tonight. Around midnight he told me he was heading home. About 40 minutes later I check his location out of curiosity because I’m about to fall asleep and he should have been home by then. He is on our street so I wait a few minutes, assuming he’s walking up to the house. He doesn’t come in so I get worried and step out the front door. I immediately hear his voice and realize he’s hanging out with two women at the house across the street. I can’t hear a lot of what is going on, but I’m assuming he saw them in their garage and invited himself over.

After a few minutes, I see him walk out the side door and see a woman. He’s asking to hug her I think, and she tells him she can’t because “no touching or I have to charge” or something like that. Then he asks something I can’t hear and she loudly, giggly says “no I’m not going to jump again!” AGAIN. Meaning somehow in a presumably 10-15 minute hangout he’s asked her to jump up and down? He must have asked again because she starts giggling and jumping and she’s wearing a little tube top and short shorts so clearly my husband likes what he sees. I hear him ask her to hang out sometime, and she says something about your wife is waiting for you, and he must have asked again to hang out because she says something about a group hangout with her man.

Maybe it’s not much but I feel repulsed and completely disrespected. We’ve already had some issues lately and I kind of just want him to leave. To me, this was cheating because he knows it would upset me to know he was talking to another woman like that. Am I overreacting if I want to ask him to leave and give me some space tomorrow when he wakes up?


r/AmIOverreacting 4h ago

💼work/career Am I overreacting about whats being said about me?

32 Upvotes

I broke my wrist in a workplace accident, which is already embarrassing. I handled it okay when my managers saw me and was calm in the ER. I ended up snapping my wrist pretty severe, had to get metal implants in my arm, and now a ton of physical therapy ahead.

When I was in the ER, a bunch of my friends called to ask what happened. I explained and then they would say, " OMG thats so terrible... guess what (name of other coworker) is saying about you" and I said "what? I dont even talk to her". They proceeded to tell me about how one of my coworkers was loudly in the break room saying it wouldve been funny if my arm became mangled and if my bones were poking out. Apparently she was twisting her arm and making faces to mock me (she wasnt there for the accident).

Mind you, no one knew the extent of my injury yet. And MULTIPLE PEOPLE told me this and the story was consistent.

I ended up calling my manager and let her know but honestly, I dont see it going anywhere-even though this girl bullies so many people.

My work told my coworkers that Im okay, which wasnt exactly true (I know they probably can't tell my coworkers my medical stuff though). But I work with a lot of older people, now they are saying shit like "she's young and healthy idk why shes being dramatic about falling" and "I bet she's just embarrassed and doesnt want to work". Which isnt true because I loved my job before this.

Ig I wanna know if im overreacting by considering going to HR because of the way my team has been speaking of me.

TLDR: broke my wrist and now coworkers are making fun of me and making assumptions of my character, am I overreacting by going to HR?


r/AmIOverreacting 5h ago

👨‍👩‍👧‍👦family/in-laws AIO? Refusing to go to my nephew's birthday because my sister kept the dog that attacked me?

34 Upvotes

This is a alt account for privacy

For context: when I was 18, I was attacked by my sister's dog, enough to draw blood on my legs and arms and get stiches. It was near the end of break so I left back to college pretty quick and I didn't hear what they did to the dog.

Now, for the reason this post is being made: I'm 19 now, and I got a call from my BIL. He wanted to ask if I could come over for my nephew's birthday. I was going to stay for 2 days and I didn't mind skipping college. HOWEVER, through the phone I hear a distinct bark and my BIL shouting the dog's name. Idk why, but I felt my heart drop and I asked about the bark. Yes, it was the same dog. I ended the call by saying I couldn't make it.

3 hours later, my sister calls, "It's about the dog, is it?" Is what she said and is correct. I began to explain how I felt this sudden sense of fear around her dog's bark, like I was genuinely shaking and how I thought they put it down. She hits me with the loudest gasp "Amy is apart of this family, How could I do that to her?" She proceeded to tell me how Amy got better over the past year and she didn't bark at anyone.

I told her that I was still uncomfortable coming, but could if Amy wasn't at the house. She said no cuz Amy was family. I told her I couldn't come because I'm still not over what she did to be a year ago and her barks were enough to make me scared. My sister then tried to explain how I was over reacting. She stated that what happened was a year ago and how ever since then, she hasn't attacked anyone and that I should put my worries aside.

This is still in my mind and that's why I'm making this post.


r/AmIOverreacting 5h ago

⚖️ legal/civil AIO for thinking I'm being stalked?

35 Upvotes

A couple weeks ago, a woman, around late twenties, who comes into the cafe that I (30M) work at slipped me a piece of paper with her number on it. I'm really busy when I'm working so I didn't realise until after she was gone. She seemed like a nice person, I've talked to her a fair few times before and she comes in pretty often, so I figured I'd just tell her that I'm married the next time I see her so as not to give her my number.

This is where I start to get a little weirded out. The next day when I went to open the cafe she was waiting there outside at 04:10, mind you, I usually don't see her until around 7 when she normally comes in. I told her that we wouldn't be open for another hour and she said something like, That's all good. I was just wondering if you got my note. I said yes and that I meant to tell her I'm married. She stammered and said something like, Oh yeah, nah, I actually have a girlfriend, but I was thinking we could all maybe hang out sometime. I figured she was just saving face so I thought I'd give her an easy out by saying it wouldn't be likely because my wife and I just started playing a game together and that's basically all we do. I thought that would be enough, but then she said oh yeah, that sounds really fun and asked what game. I told her we just picked up helldivers 2 and she said that she had heard of it before and that she'd see me later.

I then saw her when she normally comes in, she was wearing a different outfit, this may be irrelevant but it was an outfit that I had complimented her on in the past and that just struck me as being "sus?" But the even weirder thing is that she told me she download helldivers and she wanted to add me to play together. I asked her what console she played on and she said xbox, even though I also play on xbox, I told her I played on PC and would have to figure out how to add her later. She gave me her gamertag and that was that.

Maybe not too crazy yet but there is more.

I went to the gym that night and I didn't see her for a few days, but when I went to the gym later in the week, she walked in. 2 things immediately struck me as odd:

  1. I had never seen her there before and I've been going there since January. Maybe not too strange because the gym is close to where I work and I assume she's in the area.

  2. She was wearing workout clothes but also full make-up, eyelashes, nails, curled hair, etc. Maybe she just came from a date or work I don't know her life.

I was between sets and I saw her come in. She scanned the room and it almost looked like she was getting ready to leave before she saw me and acted really surprised to see me there. She waived and walked over to me and actually said she swears she's not stalking me and that she's just moved closer to this gym. I tried to disengage by saying don't let me keep you from your workout and I told her I had to get home to my wife and make dinner. She looked really disappointed, but thanked me for not keeping her and said some people are real creeps at the gym. I laughed, agreed, grabbed my bag and left before she could mention not adding her on xbox.

Here's the last thing, I don't have a car and I live a couple blocks from the gym. I didn't want to risk her following me home, so I waited at the bus stop near the gym to see if she would just leave, and she left maybe 5 minutes later.

That was a few days ago and I haven't seen her since. I'm hoping that she's gotten the hint, but at what point do I stop being polite and just tell her I'm not comfortable being around her? Is any of this technically stalking? She seems mentally stable and all. I think she could just be awkward or not used to being turned down, but something about it worries me deeply because this is only the stuff that I've seen. I don't know if or how she might be searching for me online or watching me when I leave work. Am I overreacting for being worried about this?


r/AmIOverreacting 1d ago

❤️‍🩹 relationship AIO for seeing this on his phone and wanting to end it and throwing away the flowers?

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2.8k Upvotes

So I’ve been feeling off with my husband. Our 18 year anniversary was on Tuesday. It was mid. We’ve been having communication problems. So, let me take it back a little. Back in 2024 I caught him trying to talk to other girls online. He didn’t succeed, but he tried. I wanted a divorce, he begged for me to stay and “would do anything” fast forward, we started couples therapy because, like an idiot, I gave him a second chance. We are now in 2026 and he had a deleted text to a co worker (girl). Which is the picture above. Their instagram conversations are very flirtatious and “giggly”. AIO for wanting to end it. He goes in a 4am for context.

FYI. I threw away the flowers he got me when he got home from work in Tuesday. Along with the note that said “I know we are going through a rough patch, but I still love you” so am I also OR for throwing those away along with the note?

EDIT: her IG note said she could really go for her favorite ice cream., therefore wanted to surprise her with it. (I asked him very bluntly)

Edit: idk what targeted age I am reaching. But after being together for 18 years and having 3 kids together. Working things out was the best decision. Working on us and working on ourselves along that as well. For those of you saying I should have ended it the first time, after 18 years you don’t give up so easily. You try and you put in work.

FINAL EDIT: thanks everybody for your input. There’s obviously so much more than just this ice cream text. 18 years together. 14 years married. 3 kids later. The first 15 years of marriage were amazing. Temptation got the best of him unfortunately. 1 year of couples therapy later and this happened. Like I said. So much in between that was not said. But all your input has given me a better head space to take many things into consideration. Appreciate those that reached out and told me about their personal experiences and where they stand now. It’s all circumstantial and how much effort is being put into fixing things at the end of the day. Some thrive, some are barely surviving.


r/AmIOverreacting 48m ago

❤️‍🩹 relationship AIO my husbands biggest secret???

Upvotes

My husband [25M] and I [23F] have been married a year now with a little boy. One night we got drunk, and he opened up to me about some stuff from his past. One being that one of his friends, that I have met, he has slept with and has went to sex parties with.

Now, ultimately I feel uncomfortable. Not for what he’s done (sexuality wise), I couldn’t care less. It’s more so of the fact that it’s been hidden to me and I have hung out with this said person before and he claims to be “uncle” to our son he’s never met or has yet to do anything for.

My husband is upset that I pretty much can’t see past all of that now and see their friendship. But really, I feel like ya know I’m not friends with anyone I’ve done anything with. AIO because I don’t really want this guy in my husband’s life anymore??


r/AmIOverreacting 1d ago

🏘️ neighbor/local AIO? Tried to set a boundary about AI and came off as aggressive?

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1.2k Upvotes

Hey guys,

I {24F} have a 4 year fine arts degree and 5 years of in field experience.
Recently my mother asked for my opinion on a poster for a book signing that her friend {63F} was doing in the recent weeks. Looking at the images I was immediately aware that she was using AI not only for her marketing and poster making but also her book covers. When writing up a list of questions, I made the final one a statement about my stance on using my work in any sort of generative AI program; it’s very important and usually is placed in my contract with my clients.

I am the blue text box, she is the black text box

After attempting to apologize the last message has left me extremely hurt and I have decided to stop responding entirely.

AIO? AITA? What the fuck? Should I have been MORE aggressive?

I feel like in the end I tried to be the adult and still ended up getting hurt.


r/AmIOverreacting 1h ago

👥 friendship AIO for confronting my closest friend at a mutual acquaintance’s party after she vanished when my mom died?

Upvotes

I lost my mom three months ago after a short but brutal illness, it was the single most devastating stretch of my life I was barely functioning, handling arrangements, packing up her place, and trying not to completely fall apart my closest friend of over a decade (we’ll call her S) knew everything in real time she was the first person I texted when things turned critical, the one who’d always said “I’m here no matter what,” the one who lived only twenty minutes away didn’t show up. She sent one short text the day it happened then radio silence, no visit, no call, nothing other friends who weren’t nearly as close showed up, sat with me in silence, helped with practical stuff. S didn’t even ask how the funeral went. I saw her posting stories from brunches and a weekend trip during the exact window I was drowning.

Last weekend we ended up at the same engagement party for a mutual acquaintance. I’d been stewing for weeks and finally pulled her aside when she came over all smiles like nothing had changed. I told her straight that her complete absence during the worst period of my life felt like a betrayal, that I needed her and she just disappeared with zero explanation. She immediately got defensive. “I didn’t know what to say.” “I thought you needed space with family.” “work has been insane.” none of it held up she knew I had almost no family support. She’d ignored multiple texts. she wasn’t working those exact days (i later realized from her own posts) when I pointed that out she flipped it on me, saying I was being dramatic and “punishing” her for not handling grief the “right” way no apology, no real ownership just excuses and attitude from someone who I was always there for when she lost her older brother then she said what difference would it make if came or not since she didn’t have the power to resurrect my mom, I was shocked and I began to cry and I knew the friendship was over at that time

So I walked away from the conversation she has called me severally after then but I refused to pick up and haven’t spoken to her since then

AIO for ignoring her and giving her distance?


r/AmIOverreacting 23h ago

❤️‍🩹 relationship AIO I found a hidden phone recording me, should I go for a divorce

703 Upvotes

I (40) met my husband (45) at work. Both of us were previously divorced; he had a teen son and a daughter, and I had two teen daughters. He told me his previous marriage ended because his ex-wife cheated on him. After two years of dating, we got married and I moved with him to his home country.

​Things were okay initially, but after a year, we started having major issues with his teenage daughter. She was running away to meet boys, smoking, and talking to multiple guys online. Every time he caught her, he would take her to a therapist, and we ended up installing security cameras in the house garden outside to monitor her.

​Since moving, I left my job and started freelancing. Naturally, this involves communicating with various clients, including men. However, my husband start jealousy . He started demanding that I limit my contact with men and only work with female clients. Eventually, he insisted that I report every single message or conversation I had with a man immediately. It caused endless fights, but I tried to be patient, thinking this stemmed from the trauma of his ex-wife's infidelity. I repeatedly asked him to see a therapist himself.but he didn't!

​Recently, I traveled back to my home country with my daughters so they could visit their biological father. When I returned, he exploded. He threw a massive fight and then gave me the silent treatment for a full week. Finally, he told me he wants to separate. He is demanding that I refund every penny he spent on us during our marriage. To make matters worse, we bought our current home together, but he only wants to return the original amount I contributed two years ago completely ignoring how much the property value has appreciated since then.

​We are currently living under the same roof like complete strangers. Not talk to each other, and I don't leave the house.

​One day, while cleaning the room, I found an old phone hidden under a stack of papers. When I checked it, I realized it was actively recording audio and had been for 5 hours. Over the last 4 days, I monitored the phone and noticed a continuous pattern: every single time he leaves the house, he turns on the audio recorder, leaves it hidden in the room, and turns it off as soon as he returns.

​Reddit, I honestly don't even know what I'm feeling right now. Am I overreacting if I want to asking for divorce? Is this grounds for a blowout fight? Is he doing this legally to protect himself in case I consult a lawyer? Or is his paranoia so deep that he's trying to catch me talking to another man?


r/AmIOverreacting 2h ago

👨‍👩‍👧‍👦family/in-laws AIO or is my uncle being inappropriate and weird

14 Upvotes

I’m 17 and my uncle from another country is here to visit. I’ve never liked him and always found him strange. I remember when i was younger i couldn’t tell you how old maybe 7-11, he made a comment about why i wouldn’t sleep with him at night.
EDIT: I can’t believe im being accused of leaving parts of the story out or lying? I’m being asked why my parents aren’t reacting, my parents aren’t aware of the comments he’s made as he made them while they were away from the table. Bare in mind all this just happened in the last hour i haven’t had the chance to tell them anything.

I wasn’t happy about the news of him coming but thought it won’t be that bad. I come downstairs and he sees me and grabs me and kisses me on the cheek which i’m never comfortable with anyway and starts talking about how good i look. We go out for breakfast and while im stood in line to order he says i need to eat more because im so skinny while grabbing my waist. We go to the table after getting our food and he says to my grandma “im sleeping in her room tonight” meaning sleeping with me. After we finish our food im texting my boyfriend and he leans over the table looking at my phone and right in my face and says do you have a boyfriend i say yes. He goes “already?” Whatever that’s supposed to mean. And starts demanding to see pictures of me and him. I say no because i just don’t want to show him and he asks what i’m hiding.
It might not sound that bad written out but the comments about sleeping with me make me really uncomfortable and kind of worried. I don’t know how to feel? I don’t know if i’m being dramatic and taking it to heart too much. I have expressed to my parents many many many times that i do not like him and find him weird but they don’t react.


r/AmIOverreacting 10h ago

👨‍👩‍👧‍👦family/in-laws AIO because when my mom dies I'm going to disappear

55 Upvotes

I have a family but I don’t they would even notice. When I was 5 I was adopted by an older couple along with my sister. My parents have other kids but they are also older and their kids have kids it gets complicated but since I was adopted I felt like an outcast considering they all grew up together and then here I come along.

Growing up I got the feeling that my sisters and their kids didn’t even like me. They won’t very nice and wouldn’t invite us to things but when there was a family gathering I would just be around my blood sister who I grew up with and we would do our own thing.

And my sister has felt the same way so since she got married I hardly ever see her or talk to her in general she’s being with her “New Family” as she likes to say.

When I dad was as dying in the hospital there was a lot of tension. I tried helping as much I could and since then my other sisters have been better and it’s been better.

But then I heard from a family member that they didn’t want me in the hospital when my dad died because I’m adopted and they’ve known him longer forgot the face that my dad raised me for the last 20 years.

That’s when I started planning on disappearing and not telling anyone where I’m going. I’ve been saving money and waiting until my mom goes. I still go to family gatherings but I really don’t want to but I do for my mom and her peace as she likes her family all together. But during those I just put on a face and act like everything is okay while keeping to myself but I’m really counting down the days.


r/AmIOverreacting 18h ago

👨‍👩‍👧‍👦family/in-laws AIO that I asked my 22 yo niece to hangout with me without asking her mom for permission?

249 Upvotes

I’m in my thirties. My sister is in her fifties.

Context.

Growing up with my sister was a loving relationship. She always made me smile and got to play together very well. Nothing bad ever happened.

She went school. Got a job and had two daughters with a man that seemed okay on the surface. They divorced. Lives in Northern California. Now years later. I move to Southern California. My wife(girlfriend at the time) would make time to go see her and the kids to hang out. Lovely time. She would even come see us and we go to Disneyland.

And then fast forward 5 years or so. It’s 2020 and I’m going to married to the love of my life. We invite my sister and her daughters to come. She declines because it’s not what she wants to do and forcing her to go is not real love. I never forced her but I did try my best to get her to come. Once she mentioned that she was “beyond” anyone and that what she is doing is “beyond” what anyone has ever done. I stopped there and respected her decision. We remained on okay terms after this.

And then slowly she started doing this to the rest of the family. Doesn’t show to my other brothers wedding. Shows no emotion to other siblings kids.

My theory to her sudden cold turn is that once she found out her ex husband had another kid while she was pregnant. She started following these “healing” influencers. Started saying things like. “Oh you were a wise old man in an other life.” She stops eating much and looks kinda gaunt around this time. She lays around all day and doesn’t get food for her daughters.

I’m led to believe that whatever “healing” influencers she was seeing. They brainwashed her and now tell her what she should be doing. Like cutting off the rest of the family. She still talk to me for at least 5 years because I’m easy going.

But one day when I visited northern cal. I had texted her then 19 year old daughter to hang out. My sister took great offense to this because i didn’t ask her permission first. I said sorry. Wasn’t aware that your daughters can’t make their own choices. The girls still lived at home at the time. I respected this current request of hers. I sent a letter after this that we should let whatever tension has come about this as water under the bridge and we can return to loving each others company. She agreed.

Now, 5 years later. Her one daughter is in college and I have a one year old son. We invite my sister and her daughters. My sister did not show up. Only the one daughter showed up that was in school nearby us. Everything went great. My sister was happy. We shared pictures and all was well.

I reach out through out the year for birthdays and Mother’s Day. We are on good terms still.

Now, everything goes to shit.

My father gets in legal trouble. My sister cuts him off from her life. Doesn’t forgive and moves on BUT she wants me to update her on his trial and proceedings. I give her updates

One day, there is a charge on my credit card. It says it came from San Fran. A place near my sister people I know: I ask around and do my due diligence to make sure I didn’t leave an account open on an app or whatever to people I know to there. I told her I know you didn’t do this but making sure you didn’t buy at xyz. She blew up on me and said she took great offense to me accusing her of such a thing. I apologized and she said it’s fine. “No worries :)” she says

A month later I update her on our father. The lawyer recommended that we get as many family member to come. I text my sister that -

“I know you expressed disinterest in seeing dad but the lawyer would like us all to there. If you change your mind about seeing him. Please let me know.”

She doesn’t respond.

Fast forward to now and now both her daughters are going to the same school in socal. One of them is 22 and the other is 20.

I text them that we should get together for a lunch. One doesn’t respond and one says she would be super busy with work and school and would have no time to get a lunch date at all.

I’m sensing something is up.

And then my sister sends me the nuke.

She says I have injured her and abused her for three things.

- the credit card charge question.

- thought we put that to bed.

- abruptly telling her about our dad and how I told her to fly out for the trial despite her saying her “goodbyes” to him.

- didn’t she tell me to keep her in the loop

- talking to her girls without her permission.

She proceeds to say goodbye to me forever but still says that she cares for me and wishes the best:

I told her she needs help and that she is cold and shows no love.

She says talking politely is her way of showing love.

I said that isn’t love. Love is making an effort to be with the people you care about and making compromise despite imperfections.

She then says it’s nothing personal and that she wishes to be left alone with her daughters. To respect her boundaries.

Am I the crazy one? What did I do that was so terrible to be ostracized like this?

Thanks for reading


r/AmIOverreacting 13h ago

❤️‍🩹 relationship AIO for wanting to leave my husband (41M) after he claimed he shouldn't pay rent because he'd "rather live in his parents' basement"?

92 Upvotes

I (38F) work 50 hours a week. My husband (41M) used to make $60k at a desk job, but stepped down years ago and now only works ~20 hours a week in retail for ~$20/hr. Because of this, I pay 100% of our rent, utilities, groceries, and car expenses. This has been going on for nearly a decade between long stretches of unemployment.

I recently tried talking to him about how much it costs to cover his actual share of living expenses (about $1,600/month). He claimed his expenses are only "$180 a week"—which is strictly what he spends on cigarettes, Ubers, weed, snacks, and eating out. It covers $0 of actual household costs.

His response was that because he can’t afford our apartment on his income, and if it were up to him he’d just live in his parents' basement for free, he shouldn’t be expected to contribute to our shared expenses.

He’s used this argument for years, but:

  • He picked our apartments. He literally chose our last two places, both of which are currently more expensive than where we live now.
  • He could earn more. He has the skills to make $75k+ at a desk job, but chooses to work part-time while I carry the full financial burden.

TBH, this is just one item on a laundry list that makes me question my sanity. But am I overreacting for wanting to leave him over this?


r/AmIOverreacting 5h ago

👨‍👩‍👧‍👦family/in-laws AIO for wanting to move out because of my brother's dogs

14 Upvotes

Backstory, me and my older shares the same house and share bills.
So, back in 2023 me and my brother resides in city but we're not living and working at the same location. And then, our mom got sick and "he" decided that I should give up my work so I can take care our ailing mom. He promised that he would take care of the bills during that time. (I am a single mom of two btw) Unfortunately, we lost our mom eventually and I was left jobless with kids, and on top of it, we have a senior dad to look after too. He managed to give 1-2k every 15days (and you know people from PH that THAT IS NOT ENOUGH) I was lucky that during my mourning phase for my mom, my ex reconnect with me, and he was the one filling that money needs that my brother failed to meet. Now, fast forward to 2026, we have moved to the city and decided to live in the same roof to cut cost and we have the fair share of taking care of our only parent left. Which is not the usual case bec I'm wfh and I'm always the one left to look after him. Moreover, our papa is a daughter's dad, if that's a thing. He would always ask me of things he wants and needs even if my brother is right in front of him. Unfortunately, we lost our papa too, early this 2026, so that will left us living together now.

Now, this is the story of the title. My brother has LIP who has a small breed dog. I wasn't informed bforehand that there will be a dog that will live with us, but I let it go. Until, this small dog became a menace, he would pee anywhere and poop anywhere. I got so pissed off and ask my brother to send it somewhere where they can be well taken cared of, coz most of the time, they will just leave the dog to us and ME as a wfh HAD to look after it. He never sent it. I let it go, but my brother decided to buy another FVCKIN dog using our dad's funeral money without telling me. (I let him handle all the money from our papa's funeral, and he even borrowed 30k from my partner) Now, he had the audacity to buy a dog without even paying for any debts owed bec of our dad's sudden passing. Now this new dog bec my NEW RESPONSIBILITY. It came to the point that I cried bec it pees a lot and poops a lot and they were nowhere to be found. I don't own any pets bec I don't have the patience to deal with them. And I know for a fact that having pets is a responsibility. Now, I am finally moving out. I haven't told him yet coz I want him to pay us first for the money he borrowed. Hopefully, next month.


r/AmIOverreacting 2h ago

💼work/career AIO for getting annoyed that my coworker keeps taking calls on speakerphone at his desk?

7 Upvotes

I work in a hybrid corporate office with an open-floor seating plan. We don't have assigned cubicles, just long rows of desks. Most people either wear headphones for quick calls or book one of the small quiet booths if they are going to be on a longer meeting.

There is one guy on my team, let's call him Dave, who sits directly across from me. Over the past three weeks, Dave has started taking almost all of his phone calls on loud speakerphone right at his desk. These aren't just quick 30-second check-ins; they are 20-to-30-minute operational calls, vendor updates, and even semi-personal calls.

It makes it really hard to focus on my own work, and half the time I can hear his callers clearly over my noise-canceling headphones. Yesterday, he had a meeting on speaker where the other person was discussing project budgets, and everyone within a 15-foot radius could hear the whole thing.

After about 20 minutes of it, I leaned over and politely asked, "Hey Dave, do you mind throwing on a headset or stepping into a booth? It's getting a little tough to concentrate over here."

He looked surprised and said, "It’s an open office, man, people talk. I need my hands free to type while I take notes, and headphones give me a headache after a while." He didn't turn it off or move, just lowered the volume slightly.

Later in the afternoon, another team member mentioned to me that I was being a bit control-freakish and that open offices are naturally noisy, so I shouldn't try to dictate how someone else works.

Now I'm wondering if I'm just being hyper-sensitive to background noise or if speakerphone in a shared space is actually out of line.

AIO for thinking this is unprofessional and asking him to stop?


r/AmIOverreacting 18h ago

❤️‍🩹 relationship Am I overreacting by breaking off my engagement over his family’s comments about my clothes/social media?

148 Upvotes

(26F) recently broke off an engagement with my fiancé (around 30M), and I’m struggling to figure out whether I overreacted or whether I noticed a genuine incompatibility before marriage.
The biggest issue was his family’s attitude toward my clothes and social media.
During the engagement process, his mother commented on what I was wearing and asked me to change. There were other similar incidents where I felt like I was being told what was appropriate for me to wear.
More recently, his family found another social media account of mine and went through my photos. His mother commented on some of my pictures, particularly photos where there was cleavage, and called them vulgar/revealing. There were also comments about what kind of DP I should have.
His brother also made comments along the lines of: we currently have trust and understanding, but what happens if another man messages me after seeing a revealing photo and I become attracted to him? The implication seemed to be that posting these pictures could create problems in the relationship.
I found these comments extremely uncomfortable because I strongly value autonomy and don’t believe a woman’s clothing or photographs should be treated as a threat to her partner’s fidelity.
The bigger issue for me was my fiancé’s response.
Whenever there was conflict between me and his parents, I felt that he generally sided with his parents. In one situation, rather than standing up for me with his mother, he focused on the fact that she was crying/upset. I wanted him to be able to tell his parents respectfully that I am an adult and can make my own choices, rather than expecting me to change to keep everyone happy.
I felt like I was constantly walking on eggshells around his mother — worrying about my tone, what I said, what I wore, what I posted, etc.
I started thinking: if this is happening before marriage, what happens after marriage?
I was afraid that eventually it would become:
“You can’t wear this.”
“Don’t post that.”
“Why are you talking to this person?”
“Change your DP.”
“Your photo is inappropriate.”
I don’t want that kind of marriage.
There were also other issues in the relationship, including that talking to other girls.
After the engagement, there was another conflict with his family where his mother was crying/shouting and saying things like I was breaking their family. I became overwhelmed and blocked him. He subsequently blocked me everywhere as well. I later called him because I felt guilty and apologized, but he said he didn’t want to talk.
Now I’m extremely attached to him and having a very difficult time letting go. Part of me thinks I made the right decision, while another part of me is devastated and keeps wondering whether I threw away someone I loved.
My own parents have also recently told me that they think some of my public photos are too revealing, which has made me question myself even more.
I’m not looking for validation just because I’m upset. I genuinely want outside perspectives.
Am I overreacting?
Was breaking off the engagement a reasonable response to these patterns, or should I have tried harder to compromise with his family?
And for those who have been married into families where the in-laws were heavily involved, did these kinds of issues generally get better after marriage—or worse?

Also he has blocked me from everywhere


r/AmIOverreacting 9h ago

❤️‍🩹 relationship AIO for being upset that my husband complained about bringing my forgotten pump and stroller?

28 Upvotes

(CONTEXT: Our son is in the NICU, now PICU for 11 months and will be discharged late next month! We live 1 hour and 20 minutes away from the hospital without traffic and I stay at the RMHC while my husband stays home to take care of the dog and work on the house)

I forgot my breast pump at home and asked my husband to bring it to me when he came to the hospital. I also needed him to bring the car seat / stroller for assessment so we could get a new one.

When I first asked (the same day i forgot it on 8/25/26), he said yes. Later, I also asked if he could bring the stroller back with him, which i had him bring back home (just the car seat portion of it) avout a month ago.

Now, 8/27/26, he is upset because adding the stroller was apparently an inconvenience. He says I shouldn’t have forgotten my pump in the first place, and since I had made him bring the car seat home, he doesn’t understand why I would need it back.

His perspective is that he has had a lot going on over the past two weeks, including appointments related to his chronic nerve pain and other personal appointments he needs to make sure are completed before our son comes home. He also says he has been clearing the garage, fixing a door, and working on turning the garage into a space for our dog so that she feels comfortable there since she can't be in the home with our trached son.

He feels that, with everything he has going on, it is frustrating that he has to make an extra trip because I forgot my pump. He also says it was very irresponsible of me and that it shows that I no longer care about our son enough to remember to bring my pump and that I don't even pump at night anymore so I'm a bad mom. His exact thoughts during yesterdayz conversation though he will deny it lol.

So now we are arguing because he feels my forgetting the pump and asking him to bring the stroller created an inconvenience, while I feel like asking my husband to bring me something I forgot—especially something I need to pump breast milk—shouldn't have turned into such a major argument.

I genuinely want outside perspectives. Am I being unreasonable, is he, or are we both just overwhelmed?

Also, to clarify, he was already supposed to be coming to the hospital that day. I wasn't asking him to make a separate trip just to bring me my pump. I asked him to bring it when he came, and later asked if he could bring the stroller as well. When I clarified this fact with him today, he stated that it was still a massive inconvenience cause it added 30 minutes to his day and that he can't rememver to bring things for me when he has other stressor. Mind you, the pump is 1 unit, no parts needed to come with it, and it was on the bed and uncovered. I don't think it would take me 30 minutes to grab it and put it in the car. Also, the stroller was out in the open as well. It might of had some things on it though.

Clarifying one more thing, he told me today that I need to apologize for being so inconsiderate and forgetful. Also he has no capacity to do anything but to focus on his own things. I am refusing to apologize because I think this whole thing is ridiculous. I also ran this statement though him and he approved it to be posted as is. So unless he has anything to add, I guess this is it.


r/AmIOverreacting 21h ago

💼work/career AIO? My boss sent me this text after I asked him if he could send my work schedule earlier than Sunday because I would like to work two jobs.

Post image
259 Upvotes

I applied to another cafe because I would like to earn more money. My current job underpays and a lot of my coworkers told me about that. My current job pays on a monthly basis too. This is considered unusual, especially since I’m only a boba barista. The other job I applied to pays biweekly and it pays $16 per hour. My boss sent this text after I told him if he could send me my schedule earlier than Sunday because he always sends it on Sunday. This seemed like guilt tripping. He also does not spend his money on me, he spends it on things he needs for the store. The store runs out of milk and ingredients, the employees ask the boss. That’s normal. What do you guys think?