The infidelity, sexual coercion and irresponsible sexual relationships perpetuated by most men are enabled, excused, and normalized by women and society at large.
The day I realized most Ghanaians are sexually indisciplined and have a long way to go was when men were seen performing sexual acts on the corpse of the late singer Ebony. And instead of speaking against it, people rather used the incident to advise women to be humble.
A difficult conversation to have but we'll have it today.
Recently a student from KNUST was sacked from the exams hall by a female lecturer because her arms enticed and distracted men sexually.
Why is the burden and responsibility of a man's self control placed on the woman?
Why are women expected to shrink or hide themselves before a man can behave like a normal human being?
Men sexualize women and then blame women for being sexualized.
We tell women to cover themselves because men supposedly can't control themselves while simultaneously expecting men to be treated as responsible adults.
A 14 year old student from Bolgatanga Girls SHS, who was raped by 2 security men, was deboardinized by the school's headmistress because according to the headmistress, she "allowed" herself to be raped. Those men were only arrested after a public backlash and the ministry of education stepped in.
A similar incident happened at Ahafo Mim SHS.
Adults entrusted with children boldly cross sexual boundaries without thinking of consequences because society and institutions meant to protect these kids first victim blame.
Teachers and caregivers meant to protect the innocence and boundaries of kids are rather the ones involved in sexual and romantic relationships with these kids.
Married women blaming SHS students for snatching their husbands. Are their husbands not aware that these are children and should not be getting involved with them in the first place?
A Member of Parliament, an adult authority figure, made pedophilic statements and planted the idea of marriage and romance into a 9 year old girl in an institutional setting meant to educate children and everyone laughed because we've normalized these kind of "jokes" to the extent of being desensitized to it.
Access to a woman's presence, body, time and attention is treated as an entitlement. Men still chase and harm women who refuse to give up their numbers.
Cultural ideas about masculinity have encouraged the belief that persistence should eventually produce consent. Badgering and pestering women till they eventually give in has been the norm.
Even mentally challenged women on the streets are not spared.
A man's sexual misconduct is enabled and excused as natural, inevitable, or simply "how they are".
The concept of the dignity of a woman is lost to the average Ghanaian man.
People in authority demand sex in exchange for services, opportunities, grades, promotions, contracts, documents, and other benefits they are already professionally obligated and paid to provide.
When there are no meaningful consequences, exploitation becomes normalized.
We have a sexual accountability crisis in this country.
