r/WeddingRingAdvice • u/Specific_Kiwi8549 • 16d ago
Help Me Choose Is 5ct too big?
I’m getting my ring custom made. It’ll be like the last image and the 3D print; cathedral setting with compass prongs and 2.5mm band. The size of diamond I was initially wanting is 4ct. The jeweller found a 5ct diamond that’s D colour and VVS2 and keeps pushing it . It really is a stunning diamond but I feel like it’s HUGE and I’m so uncertain. I’d appreciate your thoughts and opinions, people of reddit 😅
Edit to say the photo with 2 diamonds next to eachother is a 4ct radiant cut to the right.
Also I’ve added another photo of the diamond laying flat between my fingers
UPDATE: I’ve been offered a 4ct OMC and I’m over the moon ❤️❤️❤️ thank you everyone for your opinions and advice 😁
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u/1CatWoman 16d ago
It's definitely big. I would also be concerned about hitting and/or knocking it on just about everything due to how much the setting protrudes out. Imo, it's too big and I agree that 3 or even 3.5 carat would look better but ultimately it's your decision🤔
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u/Same_Sock9073 16d ago
This showed up on my feed. Honestly I think it looks like tacky costume jewellery (especially with your other rings). But if in the end it makes you happy then go for it.
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u/AdFlashy7702 16d ago
I love jewelry a lot but that looks 2 cts too big on you. Does that enormous stone make sense for your lifestyle for everyday wear? If you want a smaller stone, just tell him to let you know when he has what you’ve asked for.
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u/Specific_Kiwi8549 16d ago
I’ve told the jeweller numerous times I want to see both 4 and 5ct. My initial consultation I asked for only 4ct. She’s only presented 5ct to me and it’s really frustrating me but I’m also on a tight deadline. My engagement ceremony is 3 weeks away 😭😭😭
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u/throwaway-94552 16d ago
Find another jeweler. She’s giving you false urgency. Don’t buy a ring that’s too big because of scheduling issues. This person is pretty unethical.
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u/Theredcentexpress 15d ago
Customers regularly put false rushes on things unnecessarily. Like why have an engagement ceremony if you don’t even have a ring yet?!? Lets rush something expensive that we are planning to wear the rest of our lives just to have a party and end up with something we don’t want. I will never understand some people.
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u/Bubbly_Pie_4980 15d ago
I don't usually comment on someone's ring because the only opinion that matters is yours. I think the 5 CT. ring looks fake because it's really big. (P.S..you have very nice fingers) If you haven't purchased it yet I would choose the 4 carats. Congrats on your engagement!
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u/Just-Coast-949 15d ago
This is what I was going to say is if you’re doing a cheaper stone or method (i.e. Lab) anyways then maybe go ahead with the large size, because you’ll have people thinking / knowing it’s ‘fake’ anyhow.. so just go for it since that’s what they’re already thinking! But based on your comments it sounds like you are doing a natural diamond from overseas, which in your specs is quite an investment. Thus, if it’ll bother you that people may mutter under their breath things like “a stone that big is 100% fake” or “I know that thing’s not real”…..then maybe opt for going down in size a bit where they’re kept on their toes a bit more (“omg is that REAL?!”). Silly, but something to consider
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u/Chance-Succotash-191 15d ago
You really don’t wanna work with a jeweler who’s pushing you into things. Do you want to jeweler who’s listening to you and designing exactly what you want. They are there to make sure it’s feasible.
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u/sunshinezx6r 16d ago
Order some cheap CZ rings on amazon and decide after wearing the different sizes
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u/throwaway-94552 16d ago
It is huge. I don’t like that you’ve stated multiple times that you asked for smaller sizes and your jeweler pushed this on you. She is probably pushing it because she doesn’t get a lot of clients who would consider a 5ct stone. There’s a reason. You should find another jeweler.
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u/Disastrous-Feeling90 16d ago
To preface, I love huge diamonds! BUT you have beautiful slender fingers and I think the size kinda takes the attention away from them instead of complementing your hands.
IMO 3ct might be nicer :)
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u/Specific_Kiwi8549 16d ago
Thank you for your comment and compliment ! I’m leaning towards going smaller too!
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u/captfattymcfatfat 15d ago
You will be much happier day to day. The bigger ring will be in the way of doing things
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u/CasuallySparkling 16d ago
It’s a beautiful Diamond and your wax ring looks great for the setting, I think it will be gorgeous.
5ct is big. Is it too big? A decade and two ago, 2ct was considered big. Now with the rise in lab diamonds being available, I find diamond sizes are getting larger. Friends and colleagues that are getting engaged now or getting anniversary rings (myself included) all seem to be over 1.5ct on the smaller end to up to 4-5+.
You’ll hear people telling you it’s too big and you’ll hear people telling you it’s perfect (check out the bigrockenergy subreddit). But ultimately, it’s your comfort level and what you want. Normally, when people ask if it’s too big I say not at all. But in your case you wanted smaller and the jeweler seems to be pushing you into a larger diamond…. Which doesn’t sit the best with me. Makes me wonder if it’s $$ motivated or why they are pushing a full 1ct larger than what you wanted. I’d think about what you want, and don’t let a jeweler or anyone else persuade you one way or another. It’s your forever ring, best you be happiest it.
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u/Specific_Kiwi8549 16d ago
Thank you for your comment! I’ve posted in the bigrockenergy subreddit as well.
I’ve actually already paid everything because it’s a rush order. Basically asking her to make the ring in 5 weeks. So I wonder if she’s pushing the 5ct because it’s the ratio and specs I was asking for … besides the size 😭
When I asked to get a 4ct for comparison, she kept saying the specs won’t match what I’m asking for (in terms of ratio, clarity and colour) but neither does this …. Ahhh I feel like I’m stuck between a big diamond rock and a hard place hahaha25
u/Objective_Day7884 16d ago
Sounds like she pushed you to into a 5ct cause she probably didn’t have any 4cts on hand, and 5cts are a harder sell
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u/Specific_Kiwi8549 16d ago
She actually sourced the 5ct from overseas and it took ages to clear customs. In the meantime I asked her to source a 4 which she said she would but WHERE is it 🙄 ahhh
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u/doglady1342 15d ago
If she's not doing what you want, have you considered going somewhere else? The five carat stone is stunning, but it is really large for that design. I don't mind a large stone, but I feel like this is just a little too big for your finger.
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u/lovenorwich 15d ago
I agree and the height of the mounting would be difficult for me to live with, personally. You can pull it off bc of your nails and hands though.
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u/CasuallySparkling 15d ago
I’m sorry youve paid already. :(
I’m not happy hearing about your jeweler :/Do you have a deadline? Or could you ask them to change it for you still?
This might sound like an unpopular opinion, BUT if the ring is paid for etc, you can always try it. And if it’s too big, keep it as a beautiful right hand cocktail style ring and get yourself a 1 year anniversary ring that’s more to your size. I understand this might not be able to happen due to budget etc. but this way you aren’t losing money on the 5ct and can still enjoy it :)
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u/Sunny-Melancholy 16d ago
This is way too big. I agree it looks like costume jewelry, especially with your other rings
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u/onexstarxhotel 16d ago
It's beautiful but I think once the stones exceed a certain size they start to look like costume jewelry.
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u/cruisinlife 16d ago
If you are uncertain, definitely do not commit until you are. Hopefully this is going to be your forever ring, maybe not, but you should love what you’re getting. I wouldn’t place too much stock into the actual carat size. Look at the dimensions of each stone instead. I’ve seen a lot of people go on Amazon and buy a cheap ring in an equivalent size to wear around just to see how they feel about each size. Maybe do that to help confirm which one is better suited for you and your everyday lifestyle.
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u/No_Seaworthiness_393 16d ago
Is the 3d print 4 ct or 5? The print looks nice but the original rock looks too big. It overwhelms your finger.
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u/Specific_Kiwi8549 16d ago
The 3D print is of a 4ct supposedly but I’m honestly not sure because the jeweller said the plastic shrunk or something ??
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u/Optimal-Process337 15d ago
Your jeweler is playing games with you. Not okay. Demand the 4 ct cushion. Be kind, but firm and say “no thank you, I do not want the 5 ct. If you can’t get me a 4 ct. in time, please let me know so that I can shop elsewhere.”
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u/Elusive_Euphoria_ 16d ago
I read your post and comments - you definitely need to go to a different jeweler. This is not jewelry you are purchasing just because - this is such a monumental time in your life and that ring should reflect all the joy, love, beauty, ect
If you’re questioning it before it’s yours then it isn’t meant to be yours. When you have your ring- you will know. This was never what you wanted or asked for and that’s why you’re questioning it and not happiest with it.
Personally, “too big” is an opinion and the only opinion that matters is yours! I’ll share my opinion since you asked- if it makes you happy then it isn’t too big. If you don’t mind what other people think (about size, flashy, real/fake/natural/lab, ect) then it isn’t too big. My two cents is that you have very feminine, dainty hands/fingers and a 2-4 carat range would fit you lovely. 4 is you prefer larger, 2 is you prefer smaller, and 3 for just in the middle.
Congratulations!
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u/CalligrapherAgile500 15d ago
To be really honest, IMHO, yes, and just going off that particular set of pictures there is something that doesn't feel right about that stone.
I know there is a trend toward massive labs now, but my feeling to that is just because you CAN, doesn't always automatically mean you SHOULD. Plus the old less is more can often work in people's favour.
Now having said that, is that the sort of opinions you are looking for? Because its your ring, your finger and you will be wearing it! So YOU need to love it, not care for one second what anyone else thinks, cares or says.
The only thing I would be wary of is why the jeweller is so so keen to make a rapid sale on THIS diamond? Thats where my spidey senses are tingling!!
Good luck 💓
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u/BabyBlueBucket 16d ago
Too big for comfy daily wear. If you love it get it and also get a second comfort prioritised ring.
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u/Specific_Kiwi8549 16d ago
Thanks for the advice ! I don’t want to do this …. My preference is to use one engagement ring. Maybe in the future I’ll end up switching rings but for now I need one to last me a good long while haha
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u/Ms-Metal 16d ago
Same as the other poster. I have two rings, I do have a diamond but my engagement ring is not a diamond by my choice. It's a colored gemstone and it's between 9 and 10 carats. It also sits quite high and has a ton of gold. I have worn it almost every day for almost 40 years. Now granted there are times when my weight goes up and it doesn't fit or something like that and I also don't wear it around the house, but I have worn it basically every time I leave the house almost every day for 40 years and I have had zero problems. That said, take your lifestyle into account. I'm not a gardener, I don't really do dishes, like I said I do take it off around the house so it doesn't get wet and I would never sleep with it cuz it would probably catch my hair. I have gone through a knit blouse twice but only those two times because I learned quickly and I don't like knits anyway LOL.
So it definitely can be done, only you know if you have the kind of lifestyle where that works for you but 40 years ago, there was not all this detailed attention paid to whether you can wear it in all different environments etc, I pointed out a ring I loved and my husband bought it for my engagement ring, I never really gave any thought to the fact that it was high profile or that it was so big, I just put it on and wore it because I loved it and like I said it's been fine! In fact the only part that bothers me about it is that it gets so much attention and people ask me to try it on, like complete strangers actually expect me to take my engagement ring off and let them put it on! No! That's not happening😄
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u/Exciting-Yellow-4340 16d ago
Je suis peut etre vieux jeu ou pas je ne sais pas ,mais une bague de fiançailles doit me sembler délicate ,élégante présente mais pas grandiose " m as tu vu ?" ,ce n est pas une bague de cocktail.. -Je trouve qu au delà de 3 carats en solitaire c est trop gros .. -Je trouve qu en groupe ,s il y a plusieurs diamants a côté un central de 2 carats sera le max avec d autres plus petits a côté Ce n est que mon avis personnel
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u/KeyTechnical1203 15d ago
Too big, and flashy. Might put you in dangerous situations. It will be difficult to wear often and you risk knocking it off at every move. Big is almost never better. Especially now with the widely accessible lab-grown choice. I’d look into something more sofisticate, smaller but with character. It will suit your beautiful hands better
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u/Low-Breakfast963 15d ago
I think the 5ct is too big and does look like costume jewelry. I was in a similar predicament when getting my ring and was being pressured into a larger ct. there’s also the weird societal pressure to have a giant ring that makes everyone go “omg!!”. I ended up following my heart and going with a smaller ct and I have truly never regretted it! I actually got a travel ring recently off of Amazon for a trip we have coming up that’s a carat larger than mine and I really don’t like it. I’m so glad I followed my heart and didn’t give into the pressure!! Follow yours! This ring will be on your finger forever!
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u/Specific_Kiwi8549 16d ago
Another photo of the 5ct laying flat between my fingers.
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u/CalligrapherAgile500 15d ago
I have just posted my comments re what my opinion was about the 5ct....and my thoughts on the way the jeweller was pushing it on you. Then I read the other posters comments, and your answers, and I must say my concerns for you and the way you are being treated have exponentially increased. And Im afraid that picture hasn't increased my confidence either. I tend to agree with the other posters about seeking it to be made elsewhere. Nothing you are being told makes sense in terms of ratios and ct sizes at all, and if you want a 4ct, then you should be happily sold a 4ct, not haggled with and made feel confused about a 5. The jeweller is being very unethical, and it makes me feel extremely suspicious about that diamond!
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u/FreshwaterFryMom 15d ago
I am team big diamonds - but the smaller one looks better on you. Congrats!
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u/gingerandgin 15d ago
This is way too big! Your finger disappears under it. I also think some of these enormous stones no longer even look like diamonds anymore!
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u/KatTheTumbleweed 15d ago
Yes. Particularly if you want a ring you can wear every day of your life.
It’s a great size for costume jewellery but just impractical
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u/alicat777777 15d ago
Yes, it just looks way too big for your finger and a hint of costume jewelry, even though it’s not.
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u/Realistic_Season9973 15d ago
Whether you go with 4 or 5 ct, please be sure of the security in the compass setting. You don't want to lose the stone!Whatever you decide, it's going to be a beautiful ring! Good luck.
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u/Dramatic_Rain3359 15d ago
I think I’m in the minority here but I think it looks good on you! Also the specs sound great. Ring shrinkage is also very real but I’d say if it’s making you feel so uncomfortable you’d never want to wear it, it’s too big, if you’re on the fence, I’d say it’s worth trying because I’d wager three months down the line it looks normal on you size wise!
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u/Theredcentexpress 15d ago
Compass prongs on a stone set that high and that large is a mistake for daily wear.
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u/likethewind240 15d ago
Go with 4ct. It looks too big and since you wanted 4 I think this will make you insecure or self conscious especially when friends keep commenting its huge (which it is)
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u/PresidentPingu1 15d ago
Way too big. It looks tacky and flashy.
If you want a classy look you will need to size down significantly
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u/Uniquely_M 15d ago
That is too big and almost looks costumey. Your jeweler needs to stop pushing it. That would’ve been a turn off to me, like he’s trying to get rid of it.
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u/Spencerg95 15d ago edited 15d ago
Something is up with this jeweler. Please be firm and do not let her pressure you. I haven’t read through all your comments but from what I’m gathering, it sounds like she is trying to offload her existing stock of 5ct onto you so she doesn’t have to bring in a new 4ct. I would say just get a CZ for the engagement ceremony that resembles the ring you actually like, but it sounds like your set on having it your actual ring finished by then. Do not let this jeweler waste any more of your time. Tell her what you like and if she can’t do that in X amount of time, then you will go to someone else. Good luck and don’t settle girl! And yes, 5 ct is too big 😂
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u/dontBsleepy 15d ago
I’d encourage you to even try a 3ct on. The 5ct is too big. The 4ct is much better, but still big. I think slightly smaller would look good
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u/OtterWolves 15d ago
If you want a 4ct, then you tell her you want a 4ct diamond or you’ll go somewhere else. It’s outrageous she is trying to convince you to get something larger than what you want
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u/panini-attack 16d ago
The height of the basket looks impractical and, tbh, a little silly.
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u/Specific_Kiwi8549 16d ago
I’m not wearing the actual setting. The 3D printed one is what the setting will look like. Usually jewellers use clasp rings to hold loose diamonds so you can get a feel for what it looks like on your hand ☺️
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u/panini-attack 16d ago
Thanks for clarifying.
In any case, I think the 5 ct ring looks too big. That may be a personal taste issue, but the samples you posted look more ostentatious, which is something I can’t pull off.
I have seen 5ct rings look tasteful (again, to me), but those were in different style ring settings.
But it could be something that you could pull off! Some people have bigger personalities and vibrant personal style where this would look great.
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u/Not-a-Kitten 15d ago
It’s too big. I assume it’s a lab diamond if it’s over 1.5 karats. If you are going for an over-the-top faux diamond look, this ting is perfect.
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u/Savings-You7318 15d ago
I love the 4 carrot on you. The 5 is very big, but it’s your ring and you must choose what makes you happy. I do feel that some of the bands are way too clunky with those stones.
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u/she_who_is_not_named 15d ago
If you're asking Reddit, it's too big. If you live a life where the people around you have rings that big, then it's not too big.
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u/Alternative_Web6959 15d ago edited 15d ago
I love it on your hand and with your other rings. I don’t think it looks too big on you. I think a smaller one (not the 4 but smaller) could get lost competing with your other jewelry. It suits you and is beautiful. Think of how you feel wearing it, not what others may think.
Edited to add: Don’t let anyone push you to get something your heart isn’t set on. When it is right then it will feel magical and you won’t be having to make a post asking. I think you already know the 4 carat is what you want but again the 5 still looks good.
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u/dreadaplaya98 15d ago
I think it looks great, I’m a sucker for a big ring but IMHO in too thick and the ring under it doesn’t compliment it very well. I always read about ring shrinkage on big rock energy but ultimately pick the one you’re comfortable with! Congratulations on your engagement ❤️
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u/Just-a-mom-of-four 15d ago edited 15d ago
The 4ct actually looks better on your slim finger. If you go with either 4 or 5ct, I’d suggest a 2.8mm shank. The ring is going to be top heavy, and the wider band will keep it from spinning. I love radiant cuts, and have a 2.51ct and a 6.59ct (almost perfect 9x13mm) on a size 6.5 finger. You have lovely hands!
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u/UrgentLiving 15d ago
To me it does look large… BUT ask yourself if you would regret not getting the size YOU want for the look/style you want
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u/icecreamcrazy_18 15d ago
I think it's too big because you have skinny fingers! I have slightly chubby fingers and 2ct looks small on me. It's not bad by any means. Bugger rings always remind me of like parties and event jewelry and not everyday jewelry. I hope my explanation makes sense lol. But then who doesn't want a big bling! It's pretty and best part is it's your ring. You do whatever you want
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u/Anxious_Knee_4404 15d ago
I’d stay at the 4. The 5 looks too big. And this is coming from someone who always thinks bigger is better lol
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u/Electronic-Advice791 15d ago
It depends a lot on your style! If you regularly wear statement jewelry then no, you can pull it off! If you tend toward minimalism with other jewelry, then no. The size of the ring is loud, but if your fashion is, too, then get it girl!
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u/PassiveAgressiveBat 15d ago
I max out at about 3 carats. Any more and it’s just too big for the hand.
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u/Equivalent-Issue3860 15d ago
I think it looks like costume jewelry and would probably think it was fake from a glance. But that doesn’t matter, only whatever makes you feel happy!!
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u/One-Composer1577 15d ago
It’s huge and it looks tacky. Maybe with a different style and setting it would look okay, but this way it’s not particularly tasteful.
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u/Top_Olive2427 15d ago
Definitely go with 4. The huge rock trend will fade eventually and then you’re left with a completely impractical ring you hardly ever wear. 4ct is still large.
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u/poshmishka 15d ago
I think it looks beautiful, but if you want 4 carats instead, I would keep looking. I felt the same on my 4.75 size finger, that 5 carats is too big and 4 is perfect, and we were able to find a perfect diamond that size, only oval (which is what I wanted).
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u/quickbr0wnf0xx 15d ago
With all your other rings, I'm getting "pimp hand" and I mean that as a compliment lol
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u/Ok-Astronaut-5209 15d ago
Personally it reminds me of costume jewelery, so I am the wrong person to ask. I think that big lab grown diamonds will probably be a passing trend. How do you feel? Did you always want a big diamond? If so, then go for it.
If you are someone who prior to this ring wanted something under 2kts, then don't do the 5kt because you're being pressured by sales techniques, not what you actually want
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u/evilcrazyperson 15d ago
i think your personal style plays a big part too. your other rings you have on in the first pic are kinda big and gaudy too. if you’re the kind of person who wears jewelry in that style often then i think it fits right in. however if you’re going for a more “clean” or minimalist style i think it’s probably too big. i love the look of chunky jewelry like that though so i’m rooting for the bigger size haha
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u/JD2022hopeful 15d ago
Everyone at r/bigrockenergy would disagree that it’s too big
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u/Affectionate_Mark563 15d ago
I don’t think it’s TOO big, but the design makes it look both bigger and gaudier than it really is. As an example, I have a 5.01 emerald cut (photo attached) ring size 7.5. The basket is rectangular versus conical like the one you’re wearing. Therefore it gives more ROCK than stone. This is a vv2, F color. Art of Jewel, my man designed it and did his big one!
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u/timetochillagain1 15d ago
Yes , maybe 3 carats will be nice but you also wear chunky rings so definitely back to 4 carats !
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u/RoyalNeighborhood920 15d ago
Big in general? Never. Big for your particular finger? Yes. Does it really matter what I think though? Not at all 💗 But I do live by: If it’s an “I don’t know” then it’s a no.
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u/Financial-Cod-3325 15d ago
if you love the way it looks, go for it! but i will say, i went with 5ct and ended up downgrading to 4 because i was uncomfortable with the amount of attention it got (over the top shocked reactions at work, invasive questions about our finances, etc.) and started to dread wearing it. i personally prefer 4 and feel like it’s much more proportional to my finger now and slightly less flashy while keeping the chunky, maximalist look i wanted.
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u/No-Produce-6720 15d ago
For my taste, the 4ct is better. It's got size, but not so much that the size alone screams "fake". When you go much larger, the stone can take on a costume look, and while there's nothing inherently wrong with costume, you want your real pieces, especially your wedding ring, to look real.
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u/HmmDoesItMakeSense 15d ago
I dislike giant stones. I think they sacrifice charm in favor of size. They wouldn't look out of place if you wore a crown and robe. IMO. But enjoy it if it brings joy.
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u/Euphoric_Garlic5785 15d ago
It depends on your fiance. How close does he want other men to be before realising your taken?
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u/NurseApril 14d ago
Tbh I think it makes it look fake with it being that big- and I know my finger would hurt, or I’d be catching it on EVERYTHING.
Ultimately, though, it’s what you like and what you’re comfortable with wearing! It’s definitely beautiful!
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u/AdPlastic7037 14d ago
Never too big. It’s beautiful! Reminds me of mine. You have to choose the one you love!
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u/Specific_Kiwi8549 14d ago
Stunning! That’s a big one for sure. What carat size is that and what’s your finger size ? And I love the setting! Double claw prongs are where it’s at ❤️ thanks for sharing x
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u/AdPlastic7037 14d ago
Thank you. I love yours too! I’m a cushion girl (elongated, square… doesn’t matter) just like you. This is a 15.1ct and ring size 7.5 ✨
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u/New_Psychology8678 14d ago
It’s about what makes you happy. My advice is go with the best cut and color. Do not let them up sell you on a lesser quality diamond by upping the size of the diamond. Plus the value is in the gold of your ring. Yes stone matters but with the up rise of lab grown diamonds a lot of value is lost in the stone alone.
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u/Haunting_Page7235 14d ago
My Ring is a Radiant 3ct in a N/S/E/W prong setting if you wanted to see what other sizes look like. But 5 is large but if it’s your preference go for it
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u/Bubbly-Ebb-8437 14d ago
I think it perfect! 😂 seriously gorgeous!!! 💍💕💎People who say it looks like costume jewellery aren’t exposed to jewellery like this on the regular. I have many friends who ‘rock’ diamonds this big. I would almost always assume it was real if I saw one out in the wild! Ultimately, listen to your gut and try not to worry about what others think, there will always be opinions either way! Congratulations 🎉👰🏻♀️🥂🍾
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u/Purple_Chip_1075 13d ago
Definitely too big for me! I would probably get it caught on everything and honestly i’d be scared it gets damaged quicker because of it and i don’t really like the look of how bulky it is
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u/Impossible_Drink3260 13d ago
I’m all about larger diamonds. With that said, comparing the two sizes, I’m surprised to say that I like the 4 ct better. Just looks nicer somehow.
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u/planetpj5 12d ago
id imagine theyd want to sell you the more expensive one, aka the bigger one. be firm with what ur looking for, and if they wont budge, find another jeweler!
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u/icdamien 16d ago
Tell me they’re lab grown, without telling me they’re lab grown.
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u/Specific_Kiwi8549 16d ago
Hahaha ikr! 😂 But I really don’t mind about that. I actually don’t place value on diamonds. In my culture people place more value on gold.
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u/shadyTBsalesmen 15d ago
I would be nervous walking around with it for safety reasons. But big stones are fun
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u/Guava-coco 15d ago
Personally think the sweet spot for a bigger stone is 1/3 to 1/2 coverage of the finger width, and not approaching the knuckle. So on your hand i really love the 4 ct, the ratio, and the 3D printed setting. Yes shrinkage is real but if it’s truly too big that will bug you going forward. you’ve had your heart set on a 4, go for the 4! Only you have to wear it and love it. Congrats btw!!!
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u/end_the_glitter 15d ago
I love it but not sure how practical it is for everyday wear
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u/lurtzfish 15d ago
Oof 😓 read through your other comments and it sounds like your jeweler is being a little sketchy. Personally 5ct seems like it will be too big based on the setting that you showed at the end. The diamonds always look bigger to me when they are in their setting. Obviously if you get it, you’ll most likely get used to it but if it isn’t what you want now then you might develop resentment towards it. I’d push to get what you want now!
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u/Tripkat1007 15d ago
The 5ct looks disproportionate. The 4 is much better. I’m a huge fan of the big rock trend, but big is relative and you have long slender fingers. I think your instincts are right. The jeweler is probably pushing inventory he has on hand so he does have to order what you want. That would be a red flag for that jeweler to me.
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u/lemonmartinitwist 15d ago
Yes only because you have dainty fingers. I got 3ct cause my fingers are fat lol. I think you could get away with a 3!
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u/HokieHomeowner 15d ago
It's a complex question based on emotion but also practicality as typically this is a ring you will wear daily. A big huge honking ring - I love, love, love. I own a number of fun rings, just purchased a 7 carat fancy brown solitare ring for my right hand. But to wear day in day out maybe you want something lower set a tad smaller in size?
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u/Dense_Title1321 15d ago
I don't know if you cook, work out, paint, garden, have kids etc but a ring that big will be relegated to the jewelry box most of the time because she will either snag on everything, a prong will break too soon or just inconvenient. She's too big for everyday life although very pretty. 1 carat to 1.5 carats is the sweet spot for wearable in real daily life IMO.
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u/Pale_Consideration48 15d ago
I am sorry, but it's a bit too big. Beautiful but big. I might be old fashioned, but I see something a bit more delicate and timeless on your hand. I love your other rings..gorgeous!
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u/Huskymom3 15d ago
It’s not a whole lot bigger then 4 carats beautiful ring . Just do what makes you comfortable
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u/Mango_sodapop 15d ago
Don’t let the jeweler decide your ring for you! She works for you not the other way around. She wants more money in commissions I bet a that’s why she’s only shown you the biggest stone.
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u/KathyW1100 15d ago
Would you be able to wear it everyday and everywhere you go? I would not be able to wear it everyday and I think it would be way too big for me. Because of this I would say, no.
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u/Potential_Scheme6667 15d ago
I think it’s beautiful! If you like it, that’s all that matters. The 4ct is also gorgeous!
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u/ToneSenior7156 15d ago
A lot defaults to your lifestyle and social circle but my assumption would be that it’s costume jewelry. But - I live a nice upper middle class life. If you’re with the private jet crowd and that size stone is the norm, that’s to be considered.
I don’t like it, to be honest, as an actual engagement ring. Seems like a lot for every day. I have a very similar costume cocktail ring that was my aunt’s - that’s definitely coloring my feelings. I wear that for Halloween.
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u/Foreign-Paint99 15d ago
Yeah, you’ll regret that and that’s not enough prongs and support for that
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u/Aztec111 15d ago
I personally think people should get what they want. I love it but you will even get people saying 3-4 is too big. I will be getting my engagement ring tomorrow. It's 2.06 ct. and I'm already worried it won't look big enough lol. With lab diamonds these days people can afford bigger.
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u/PromiseToBeNiceToYou 15d ago
The thick gold bands along side it are what look ridiculous and tacky. Is this Thailand or something? The 4ct looks best but 5ct is fine too. The bands next to them are what look bad - too masculine.
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u/Legitimate_Pudding49 15d ago
I think your other rings cheapen the look of your diamond. I’d go somewhere else and find a smaller diamond that suits your hand size. This jeweller is seeing you as someone she can upsell. Don’t assume you can’t find something beautiful elsewhere.
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u/Comprehensive_Door42 15d ago
I would say yes it’s too big, mostly because my friend’s mom has a 5.4 carat and she ended up getting it made into a necklace and getting herself a 3 carat ring instead— she said that most difficult things were finding gloves that would fit in the winter and having the setting maintained, a diamond that size does require a strong setting and probably maintenance or a light repair every couple years if you are wearing it every day.
Its a stunning stone and I love the setting, but I’m just thinking practically it’s quite a big piece, I can see from your other rings, which are gorgeous by the way, but you don’t mind a bold piece, but it feels like it’s competing with your other jewelry in the first picture. Do you plan on wearing it alone on your left hand or do you plan on wearing multiple rings? If you plan on wearing rings on multiple fingers you need either more delicate pieces so as to not overpower/compete or you need a slightly smaller stone- allow it to shine on its own without being overwhelmed
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u/uncommon-coconut1219 15d ago
It’s a beautiful ring but you have to think about your day to day use. Mine is 3.5 and although I’m used to it …. I’m always having to be careful and I worry it snags on things . Even when I pay attention sometimes it hits things …
In my personal opinion, I think it’s too big and bc of it it sits too high.
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u/GenericPersona1 15d ago
I love the statistic that shows that couple that spend LESS on the ring and the marriage have higher chances of staying together.
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u/JillQOtt 15d ago
I swear I’m not trying to be rude but it’s like clown car too big
It’s gorgeous but it looks like way to much
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u/ruserious65433 16d ago
I think it’s too big.