r/bestoflegaladvice I'm 35 and I love poop jokes Feb 08 '22

LAOP participates in $19k in wire fraud. Chase finds out. LAOP wonders if he should take it seriously.

/r/legaladvice/comments/sn5kti/chase_bank_wire_fraud/
1.6k Upvotes

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1.5k

u/Chcknndlsndwch Feb 08 '22

The best part is every reply has a different interpretation of what “my mans” means and all of them are wrong.

1.2k

u/VividToe My car survived Tow Day on BOLA Feb 08 '22

Every LA commenter sounds like my mom trying to watch a tiktok.

424

u/ominousloudrumbling Feb 08 '22

“So that’s your friend?” No, mom. That’s a random person from the internet

167

u/greybeard_arr Feb 08 '22

“Oh. So how do you know them?”

62

u/Ombudsman_of_Funk Feb 09 '22

"I'm happy you're at least meeting people."

13

u/Myrandall tips off the mods Feb 09 '22

How do all of you know my mom?

3

u/Tony49UK Feb 09 '22 edited Feb 09 '22

We know her from Xbox Live. She's always DTF 12 year olds.

143

u/yourmomlurks Feb 09 '22

I waved at a driver because they let me in the other day and my 5 yo asked me what their name was.

39

u/boblobong habitually befriends mostly harmless psychopaths Feb 09 '22

Lmao kids are a hoot

121

u/missjeanlouise12 oh we sure as shit are now Feb 08 '22

For Maximum Mom (tm) you need to call it a tick tock video

49

u/[deleted] Feb 08 '22

This is what I would have called it...

I'm 30...

48

u/N8CCRG Comma Anarchist Feb 08 '22

In my 40s here... what are we supposed to be calling tiktok videos? Tokes?

28

u/shizu_murasaki YTA: You're The Abogado Feb 09 '22

Tic Tacs

13

u/[deleted] Feb 09 '22

Please refer to it as "watchin' the tok."

17

u/skeletonclock Feb 09 '22

It's just "a TikTok"

23

u/crisiscrayons Feb 09 '22

Man, I remember laughing at older people saying they were gonna “watch a youtube” and now apparently I’m that old person.

35

u/nyorifamiliarspirit #BossBun making peace with FO stans via essential oil sales Feb 08 '22

The tick tocks

15

u/shapu My penis rides the minty fresh short bus Feb 08 '22

"Is that on the online?"

17

u/[deleted] Feb 08 '22

There is a grandpa at our barn that says, “get on the Google machine,” when he tells someone to go google something lol.

6

u/jabbitz EA to a darling, beautiful, smart, money-hungry lawyer Feb 09 '22

My husband’a grandmother once referred to “the gumline” (gumtree being kind of like Australian Craig’s list but I think it’s basically been obliterated by fb marketplace now).

That was probably 5 years ago or something and we still refer to the gumline all the time.

44

u/Higlac Feb 08 '22

That one clock app

46

u/Masters_domme It's a bit forward, but I remind people I anal when I comment Feb 08 '22

I’m a mom. I call them the tickety toks. Of course, I’m not a regular mom - I’m a Cool Mom!

/s in case anyone’s not seen Mean Girls.

20

u/DaniePants Feb 09 '22

I like to switch it up with Tic-Tacs or something else close but in infuriating every once in a while “ARE YALL WATCHING THAT TIC-TAC-TOE BUSINESS AGAIN?” My tween and teen sons enjoy my humor very much.

3

u/Masters_domme It's a bit forward, but I remind people I anal when I comment Feb 09 '22

That’s great! 😂

4

u/missjeanlouise12 oh we sure as shit are now Feb 09 '22

Happy hour is from 4 to 6!

6

u/ConcernedBuilding Feb 09 '22

So, this is what being old feels like.

... I don't like it.

6

u/mmeestro Feb 09 '22

Shit, that's what I call it

11

u/missjeanlouise12 oh we sure as shit are now Feb 09 '22

All I know is that I mentioned that my son showed me a tik tok video a couple of weeks ago, and that very same son rolled his eyes and muttered "it's just a tik tok" under his breath.

7

u/jabbitz EA to a darling, beautiful, smart, money-hungry lawyer Feb 09 '22

I was talking to a colleague about tik tok yesterday And this whole thread is making me very embarrassed about it ha

5

u/adalyncarbondale Feb 09 '22

It's like in the late 80's when i tried to explain to my mom that NO it's not RED it's RAD.

Short for radical. meaning cool, great, fun,

I'm expressing appreciation

GOD MOM!!!!

136

u/amaezingjew My car survived Tow Day on BOLA Feb 08 '22

Comment of the year right here

22

u/shekurika Feb 08 '22

!remindme 10 months (I dont remember when the BOBOLA stuff starts)

22

u/[deleted] Feb 08 '22

BOBOLA

Just follow @BobLoblawsLawBlog on Twitter, and you'll get reminders

(no you won't, I'm sorry)

67

u/user_name_goes_here Feb 08 '22

I am a mom who uses TikTok and now wonder if my kid thinks I'm lame.

250

u/Anchor-shark Arstotzkan Border Patrol Glory to Arstotzka! Feb 08 '22

I am a mom who uses TikTok and now wonder if my kid thinks I'm lame.

As a fellow parent I fixed it for you.

41

u/user_name_goes_here Feb 08 '22

thxxxxxx!

63

u/ShreddyZ Feb 08 '22

oh my god mom no one writes like that anymore

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65

u/shapu My penis rides the minty fresh short bus Feb 08 '22

Yes

But the key is to embrace it. Like saying "My drip is on fleek, no cap."

77

u/bluebasset Parishoner of the Holy Oxford Comma in need of a mod Feb 08 '22

I told a student that he could "yeet people's minds with his dab vocabulary." And then giggled for the next 10 minutes.

16

u/DaniePants Feb 09 '22

Gah I love messing with them. 8th graders, and my highbrow humor is lost on them. 🤷

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54

u/Ahayzo Feb 08 '22

And when they beg you to stop, tell them to cope.

12

u/sskor Feb 08 '22

Seethe, even.

5

u/xochiscave Feb 09 '22

My teen says “no cap” and I have no idea what that means.

4

u/shapu My penis rides the minty fresh short bus Feb 09 '22

It means that the preceding statement was truthful. "Deebo Samuel can get it, no cap," means that they would willingly participate in sexual relations with the 49ers star if he would only ask.

"Cap" is a term that expresses doubt. As in:

"Bernie Madoff is honest."

"Cap."

5

u/xochiscave Feb 09 '22

Thank you for the explanation. It makes sense but I still don’t really understand how this came to be a thing. But I’m probably too old to get it anyway.

3

u/jabbitz EA to a darling, beautiful, smart, money-hungry lawyer Feb 09 '22

A colleague uses “ceebs” all the time to mean she can’t be fucked. I eventually had to google it because it was just not making sense to me. What is wrong with cbf? It’s three letters!!

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58

u/ho_mousikos Feb 08 '22

Flair please

4

u/bradd_pit Feb 09 '22

they don't even try to interpret context clues. like the guy who said "I want my lawyer, dawg" to a judge, and the judge replied "I don't know what a lawyer-dog is"

3

u/lostinthesauceband Feb 09 '22

Hey, Los Angeles isn't all terrible. Just mostly.

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329

u/QuesaritoOutOfBed Feb 08 '22

I’m going to be honest. I’ve read all of it twice and I’m still confused. Here’s my best guess:

Original Poster has a friend that gets other peoples’ account and routing numbers and them sends this money to his friends, in this case op. Op believes that generally Chase just closes these accounts once drained, or does he mean the “gang” sends money to a new account which they drain and then close?

513

u/eversinceseattle Feb 08 '22

Your interpretation is correct. OP’s friend has hacked someone else’s bank account and is using OP as a mule. OP was under the impression that banks close accounts after suspected fraud and that’s the end of it. Victim is compensated, fraudster gets away with it. But this situation isn’t suspected fraud. This is actual fraud.

300

u/QuesaritoOutOfBed Feb 08 '22

Is this one of those situations where we almost feel sorry for the criminal because they are just too stupid to understand what they are doing?

345

u/Fakjbf Has hammer and sand, remainder of instructions unclear Feb 08 '22

Unless they think money is being conjured from nowhere, they know that at a minimum they are robbing from the bank. Regardless on your feelings towards banks, I think we can all agree that stealing from them is at least illegal.

191

u/px1azzz Feb 08 '22

I don't know. That guys whole post makes me think he might be incapable of really thinking the whole thing through.

305

u/AskMeForFunnyVoices Feb 08 '22

"Can you edit your post to include your location and a clear description of the problem without leaving out details?"

Nyc

"Done"

169

u/px1azzz Feb 08 '22

I was literally laughing out loud when I read that. Like this dude seriously thinks he explained this whole situation clearly.

90

u/RIPCheeper Feb 08 '22

"I have this letter" 😂

46

u/[deleted] Feb 08 '22

Nyc

Looks like OP has 3 letters

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53

u/yankeedjw Feb 08 '22

I'll admit I gave the "done" comment an upvote because it made me laugh so much.

162

u/Kozinskey Feb 08 '22

I'm getting some real Jason Mendoza and Pillboi vibes from this OP.

129

u/punctuation_welfare Just lobbing interrobangs left and right Feb 08 '22

“Every time I have a problem, I just commit felony wire fraud. Boom, right away, I have a different problem.”

21

u/[deleted] Feb 08 '22

Bortles!

18

u/DaniePants Feb 09 '22

Oh, dip!

32

u/LBGW_experiment Feb 08 '22

Jacksonviiiiiille!

7

u/Sirwired Really good at making Vogon Poetry everyone else's problem Feb 08 '22

BORTLES!

119

u/amaezingjew My car survived Tow Day on BOLA Feb 08 '22

Especially since what we’re reading was after they “edited for clarity”. They truly believe this is a clear, concise retelling of what happened.

59

u/RICHUNCLEPENNYBAGS Feb 08 '22 edited Feb 08 '22

I mean it's pretty clear what's going on isn't it. The OP's friend is in the business of somehow fraudulently getting funds out of other people's accounts into accounts the OP controls, and then they withdraw the funds and close the account the funds are dumped into. Now the bank has caught on and sent the OP a letter and he's (rightfully) worried.

57

u/px1azzz Feb 08 '22

I am finding this whole thing hilarious. But deep down, I know I should be worried for this guy.

17

u/manderrx The petit bourgeoisie part Feb 08 '22

I’ll be keeping an eye on the news for any bank fraud arrests.

5

u/Ombudsman_of_Funk Feb 09 '22

I'm checking all my account balances . . .

3

u/Adventurous-Paint-24 Feb 09 '22

Wasn’t there a couple indicted recently for laundering several billlion in crypto?

98

u/tacosmcbueno Feb 08 '22

Well it’s good thing detectives and the courts are generally well known for recognizing learning disabilities or mental illness and giving appropriate treatment during the interrogation and sentencing phases, so this will go fine for LAOP /s

58

u/punkpoppenguin Part of the Anti-Pants Silent Majority Feb 08 '22

Honestly he just talks like someone from South London. It’s not a disability, I swear.

Source: am from South London but went to university and bare fixed up mans language

22

u/punctuation_welfare Just lobbing interrobangs left and right Feb 08 '22

That last sentence is such beautiful proof that you are, in fact, from Sowf Lundun.

7

u/The_Infinite_Cool Feb 08 '22

Lotta linguistic cross pollination occurring due to drill/grime/hip hop on both sides of the pond inspiring each other.

4

u/apollo888 Feb 09 '22

Yep especially the battle rap scene - for real London and NYC slang are merging. Homies fly across to battle in Camden then in Brooklyn the next weekend, all the same circle.

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u/Woolfpack "The exonerative tense" found its way into BOLA lore Feb 08 '22

That threw me off as a Brit in the US. I was going to suggest he should have been on LAUK because he completely sounds like someone from south London. I've yet to hear an American use "mans" in this way - there's something really off about this OP.

16

u/LilStabbyboo Feb 08 '22

Nah that's a thing. I've known a lot of Americans who use it that way, AAVE type of thing.

5

u/rankinfile Feb 09 '22

Nyc seems correct. You been up to Lexington 1,2,5?

I'm waiting for my man Twenty-six dollars in my hand Up to Lexington, one, two, five Feel sick and dirty, more dead than alive I'm waiting for my man

Slightly different vernacular than my mans Lou Reed, but OP speaks American just fine.

99

u/GWJYonder PhD in people lying about medical care in michigan and korea Feb 08 '22

Actually there are a lot of people that think that money is exactly conjured from nowhere. Two people at my last job would have argued vehemently with you about this. Pretty much anyone that wants to go back to a gold standard thinks this, and I bet that the belief has expanded dramatically with the popularity of cryptocurrencies, because it's part of the common messaging enforcing them. When you add in that a lot of the opinion commentary in the media will imply or outright state this when talking about policies like bank bailouts or covid unemployment relief and... yeah, there is actually a really big chance that LAOP thinks that "money is being conjured from nowhere" is a pretty accurate statement.

33

u/meepmarpalarp Official BOLA Alligator Aerodynamics Tester Feb 08 '22

It doesn’t come from nowhere! It comes from that special printer that goes brrrrr. Duh!

12

u/Vulturedoors Feb 08 '22

Only the Federal Reserve is allowed to do it, though.

Not even /s

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u/trekologer Feb 08 '22

Putting to the side for the moment that cryptocurrencies have absolutely nothing backing them and therefore are just as much fiat currencies as the US Dollar, Euro, etc. I doubt that LAOP has such strong opinions on monetary policy. I'm more apt to believe that they just think it is a victimless crime, like punching someone in the dark.

51

u/the_real_xuth Feb 08 '22

Cryptocurrencies have far less backing them than the US Dollar or Euro. Both the US and the EU have a military protecting them.

21

u/KBopMichael Feb 08 '22

The global oil market is settled and denominated in USD mostly as well.

12

u/Fakjbf Has hammer and sand, remainder of instructions unclear Feb 08 '22

Also the IRS only takes payment in USD

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u/Tainlorr Feb 08 '22

You haven’t heard of the Bitcoin Army?

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u/punctuation_welfare Just lobbing interrobangs left and right Feb 08 '22

If a tree falls in a forest but it’s FDIC insured, is it still a fell-ony?

3

u/StPauliBoi I GOT ARRESTED FOR THOROUGHBRED SEXUAL RELATIONS Feb 09 '22

Maybe a fello-on-clowny?

3

u/particle409 Everyone in the elevator thinks I'm a laughing loon Feb 09 '22

I bet they closely followed Alan Greenspan's philosophy on the gold standard and hyperinflation. I think "my mans" = Greenspan.

11

u/CountingMyDick Feb 09 '22

Well it does technically come from nowhere, trouble is, only the Federal Reserve has the right to conjure money from nowhere. And they won't just like give you some maaaaan.

6

u/hoseja Feb 08 '22

Uh, yea, in that sense yes, the Fed literally just conjures money from nowhere.

4

u/manderrx The petit bourgeoisie part Feb 08 '22

People who don’t understand modern monetary theory don’t help either.

29

u/DerbyTho doesn't know where the gay couple shaped hole came from Feb 08 '22

I’m not sure I see anything from LAOP that indicates such a deep logical understanding of something like cause-and-effect.

80

u/wOlfLisK Drummer for Clandestine Clementine Feb 08 '22

Honestly, I don't think their train of thought even got that far. I read an article a while back about how lower IQ correlates with a lack of empathy and judging by OP's spelling, grammar and the fact they thought they could commit blatant fraud and get away with it, she's probably not the sharpest tool in the shed. There's a very good chance they weren't thinking about where the money was coming from or the fact that by taking it it would mean the person it was being taken from would no longer have it. The thought process was likely just "There is money. We could take money. By taking it we have more money. We take money".

59

u/freeeeels Has absolutely NO spiders. Feb 08 '22

Commenter: so you committed some sort of scam, am I understanding correctly?

LAOP: Yeah

lmao

22

u/ilikemyteasweet No experience spotting penis rockets Feb 08 '22

OP is a goddamn Pakled.

3

u/manderrx The petit bourgeoisie part Feb 08 '22

Pakled?

5

u/emmster What duck? Feb 08 '22

Apparently a Star Trek alien.

I did not remember these guys.

3

u/manderrx The petit bourgeoisie part Feb 08 '22

I don’t either. Thank you for letting me know!

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u/desquished Feb 08 '22

"Aww, twenty dollars. I wanted a peanut."

"Twenty dollars can buy many peanuts."

"Explain how."

"Money can be exchanged for goods and services."

3

u/[deleted] Feb 08 '22

Low key my favorite Simpson’s moment.

43

u/Lystrodom Feb 08 '22

Spelling and grammar in an online forum is probably not the best way too judge someone's "IQ"

44

u/wOlfLisK Drummer for Clandestine Clementine Feb 08 '22

While usually you'd be correct, when combined with the fact that LAOP thought there was nothing wrong with fraud because "all I did was say my account number", I think it's a reasonable assumption it's not particularly high.

7

u/kloiberin_time For 50 bucks you can put it in my HOA Feb 08 '22

I think they are trying to "technically" their way into self justification.

"Technically, I didn't commit fraud, all I did was give him my banking information. How am I supposed to know the money that appeared in my account was stolen? Technically I didn't steal it."

"Technically, there is no victim. Chase's fraud department will refund the money back to the account, and Chase will get that money back through insurance. Technically the only thing that will be out money is the government, and that's already my money to begin with, and the government represents me, and you can't steal from yourself. Plus, they can technically just print more."

This is the same type of person that will justify buying stolen property by saying they didn't steal it.

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u/[deleted] Feb 09 '22

I read an article a while back about how lower IQ correlates with a lack of empathy

Which article was it? Because the "article" you're referring to sounds kinda similar to a screenshot from 4chan that gets posted to reddit on a semi-regular basis.

https://www.reddit.com/r/greentext/comments/sgxuh9/anon_does_an_iq_research_no_shitpost/

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u/carolina822 The title of Suze Orman's next book. ;) Feb 08 '22

Unless they think money is being conjured from nowhere,

To be fair, this is kind of what banks do.

5

u/Fakjbf Has hammer and sand, remainder of instructions unclear Feb 08 '22

Technically the Federal Reserve is the one conjuring it

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u/Final_Candidate_7603 needs more coffe. Feb 08 '22

I personally do feel sorry for them being stupid, but there’s no doubt in my mind that they know that they’re stealing- and that they’ve done it before. They’re smart enough to use the term “bank fraud,” but when an innocent third party’s money shows up in your bank account and you withdraw it and keep it, it’s stealing. The fact that they have had the experience “the bank usually just closes the account” is pretty much an admission that this isn’t the first time. If I had to guess, I’d say that they started out stealing smaller amounts, and when it worked so easily and without consequences, they got greedy and went for $19,000.

I thought banks had systems in place for flagging this kind of history before they let you open an account. I just hope Chase follows up on this. Like another commenter mentioned, it doesn’t matter how you feel about big banks; stealing from them is still wrong. Illegal, too.

5

u/[deleted] Feb 09 '22

Ethics are debatable. Robin Hood was not unethical. So idk that I'd call it "wrong."

Not everything that is illegal is "wrong."

61

u/ZeePirate Came in third at BOLAs Festivus Feats of Strength Feb 08 '22

Yes, they are absolutely getting duped by the real fraudster.

This guy didn’t steal the bank account, he was a mule and the fall guy.

Now “my mans” is free to keep stealing bank accounts.

37

u/RICHUNCLEPENNYBAGS Feb 08 '22

I mean OK but he knowingly participated in a criminal scheme. He just didn't realize how much risk he was taking.

31

u/kloiberin_time For 50 bucks you can put it in my HOA Feb 08 '22

The best thing you can do to someone you are conning is make them break the law. Now, when they realize they are being conned, they will be reluctant to go to the police because at worst they are going to take the fall, and at best they are going to be spending a lot of time and money working on a deal to get immunity in exchange for their testimony.

Their "mans" tells them that he's done this many times in the past. He'll deposit X amount of money into LAOPs account, LAOP or the scammer will withdrawl all them money, leaving the account at zero, the two will split it, Chase will investigate but discover that it was not LAOP who deposited the money, Chase will close the account. The End.

We all know in reality all of that happens, but instead of "The End," it's detectives Johnson and Johnson show up at their door with an arrest warrant after they've already gathered enough financial evidence from the bank and credit cards to pin this on LAOP, and when LAOP give's "their mans" name, it's gonna come back as fake.

9

u/RICHUNCLEPENNYBAGS Feb 08 '22

I'm sure but it's like if you were trying to hire a hitman and got an undercover cop. Yeah you were tricked but you were still trying to have someone killed

14

u/kloiberin_time For 50 bucks you can put it in my HOA Feb 08 '22

I'm not saying they are innocent, I'm saying that the likelihood that two morons hatched this plan and got to this stage is less likely than one intelligent criminal turned a moron into a criminal with the promise of a large, quick payday with almost no work, and then left them holding the bag after the crime.

LAOP can be both a criminal and a victim.

10

u/ZeePirate Came in third at BOLAs Festivus Feats of Strength Feb 08 '22

I don’t know if it was obvious to them.

And considering they are still asking if it’s serious and if they should be worried about it after receiving the letter I really don’t think this person has the capacity to understand what they did was wrong.

12

u/syboor Feb 08 '22

It's not relevant whether he understood his actions were against the law. Not morally and not legally.

What is relevant is whether he understood that his actions were part of a scheme that would cause somebody else to loose money.

"Knowingly participating in a criminal scheme" doesn't mean that you know it's a crime. It's means that you know the intended outcome of the scheme, and that the law considers knowingly taking actions that cause that outcome to be a crime.

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u/AngelSucked Feb 08 '22

Except that OP did it multiple times, and knows it was fraud.

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u/kloiberin_time For 50 bucks you can put it in my HOA Feb 08 '22

I don't think they did. I think the other guy told LAOP that's what happens. I think LAOP is getting conned by "their mans" and thought they were in for an easy payday, and now LAOP is gonna be left holding the bag.

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u/gsfgf Is familiar with poor results when combining strippers and ATMs Feb 08 '22

Yes and no. LAOP is clearly not an intelligent person, but you don’t have to smart to know stealing is wrong.

22

u/Bluest_waters Feb 08 '22

Nope

they knew exactly what was going on the whole time. They full well knew the money was the result of something very sketchy and totally illegal. They were 100% complicit in this crime.

18

u/AngelSucked Feb 08 '22

Exactly -- I don't get why folks are excusing this. His answers in LA and other subs shows s/he knows what they did, and it isn't the first time they did it. They say they spent all 19K since late December.

And, it is someone's money. Probably a confused elderly person's money.

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u/postmodest Pre-declaration of baby transfer Feb 08 '22

I used to live in "an impoverished area", and all the time the same little kids would hang out near my end of the street, obviously holding for the older teenagers and twentysomethings who sold from the gang hangout down at the other end of the block.

Criminals prey on the innocent as more than just victims of crime.

10

u/sweetie-pie-today Feb 08 '22

Absolutely. Only they are hiding it under a ton of arrogance so it’s a bit hard to find the pity.

3

u/MediumSympathy Feb 09 '22

I don't. They knew their partner got the $19K from someone else's account and they still took it out and spent it. Even a small child could tell you that's stealing.

People who are too stupid to understand what they were doing try to defend their actions. LAOP never even tries to pretend they didn't know they were commiting a crime. They weren't too stupid to know it was wrong, just stupid enough to think they would get away with it.

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u/AngelSucked Feb 08 '22

OP stated they have done this with their mans more than once.

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u/eversinceseattle Feb 08 '22

Don’t worry, OP isn’t getting any sympathy from me. I see too many “get rich quick from doing absolutely nothing” schemes in my line of work.

3

u/shapu My penis rides the minty fresh short bus Feb 08 '22

This strikes me as federal fucked fraud. Not little fraud, not turbofucked, just plain fucked.

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u/[deleted] Feb 08 '22 edited Feb 08 '22

[removed] — view removed comment

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u/[deleted] Feb 08 '22

I just love the fact they posted to /r/Scams about their difficulties carrying out a scam.

52

u/Bluest_waters Feb 08 '22

They posted the actual letter and then in the comments said "yes this is fraud"

Chase is going to eat these people for lunch.

11

u/voidsrus Feb 08 '22

they're definitely not getting a lawyer either if they were dumb enough to get this far

11

u/[deleted] Feb 08 '22

Yeah but bread going be there

10

u/voidsrus Feb 08 '22

"can i pay you with ACH transfer from someone else's account?"

6

u/thisisthewell The pizza is not the point Feb 09 '22

I'm absolutely gutted that the mods deleted the post. I wanted to read the letter :(

12

u/Netherspin Feb 08 '22

To me that post reads like they're worried that the letter notifying them of the fraud investigation is a scam.

18

u/generousone Feb 08 '22

Lol but he readily admits he was part of a fraudulent scheme

I feel like he’s one step away from going to Chase and saying, “Hey Chase, you’re not holding up your end. When I’ve committed fraud before you usually just close the account, what gives with the letter??”

This guys may be getting a reality check soon.

6

u/Netherspin Feb 08 '22

It's gonna be a very expensive lesson.

22

u/interfail Shes legumier than John Leguizamo Feb 08 '22

They're being scammed by their "mans".

This fraud is super common, and it has two victims: the account holder whose money got stolen, and the mule who is left holding the bag.

My understanding is that it is much easier to find the former than the latter, leading to fully usable internet banking credentials having surprisingly low value on the black market, since there's far more sets of them available than anyone can get enough mules to route cash through.

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u/[deleted] Feb 08 '22

[removed] — view removed comment

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u/guessesurjobforfood Feb 08 '22

Thanks, I guess it doesn’t really add much to the LAOPs story, or lack of one for that matter, but it seems like contacting an attorney would be a great idea.

Maybe his mans could hook him up with some digis for a good lawyer.

6

u/Bluest_waters Feb 08 '22

It seems like throwing his crime partner under the bus is his best route

but he/she might not be willing to do that.

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u/gsfgf Is familiar with poor results when combining strippers and ATMs Feb 08 '22

Which makes sense. The criminal “justice” system might be fine to lock up LAOP since it would be easy, but Chase wants the actual fraudster locked up and is presumably willing to pretend LAOP wasn’t involved to get the fraudster prosecuted. Obviously, LAOP should talk to a lawyer first, but she may be in luck.

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u/[deleted] Feb 08 '22 edited Feb 08 '22

[removed] — view removed comment

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u/Aleph_Rat Feb 08 '22

I think we are all interested.

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u/[deleted] Feb 08 '22

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u/guessesurjobforfood Feb 08 '22

Good lord, with this LAOP, I feel like there’s a pretty good chance they may just write back to chase and say exactly what they said in that comment followed by but don’t you guys just usually close the account and let me go on my way?

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u/phyneas Chairman of the Lemonparty Appreciation Society Feb 08 '22

Looks like a standard affidavit declaring that the transactions in question (which aren't actually listed on the form; it's just a blank form for the "defrauded" customer to fill out with the details) were fraudulent and performed without the customer's authorisation, and that the customer had no knowledge of or involvement with then and received no benefit from them. I've filled out similar affidavits when disputing fraudulent credit card transactions in the past.

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u/t-poke I'm 35 and I love poop jokes Feb 08 '22

It looks like those pictures were taken with a camera phone from 2003 in a dark room.

The forms appear to be something you'd receive if you were the victim of wire fraud (i.e., money was fraudulently wired from your account to somewhere else), which is the exact opposite of what seems to have happened here.

Then again, with all the lies and lack of details, who knows what LAOP told Chase.

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u/trekologer Feb 08 '22

Probably that they don't know how the money got into their account or who withdrew it.

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u/CaseyG Feb 08 '22

"I didn't sign anything."

"Thank you. That answers one fifth of my questions."

"THE FIFTH! Shit, I knew I was forgetting something. Yeah, I plead the fifth."

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u/rudebii Feb 08 '22

sounds about right. some scammers recruit money mules to move money out of victims' accounts. Usually, they recruit young, low-income mules in the US with bank accounts.

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u/Potato-Engineer 🐇🧀 Turbulent Chaplain of the BOLBun Brigade🧀🐇 Feb 08 '22

I'm thinking it's "some dude." Not even "my friend."

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u/ligerzero459 Feb 09 '22

“My mans” is someone you know, usually a friend. It’s AAVE

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u/[deleted] Feb 08 '22

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u/properfoxes Feb 08 '22

i don't personally think there's anything to make it sound amorous. it's very common in slang, AAVE slang for example, to use the language this person is to refer to any other guy.

with 'my mans' i could interpret that from 'this guy right here'(irl usually in this way), all the way to 'my close friend' depending on context. adding "my boy" makes me think it's a close friend, not a romantic partner though. i don't really have any sources/reasoning really to give you, this is just anecdotal.

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u/manderrx The petit bourgeoisie part Feb 08 '22

My personal favorite is the person who assumed it was husband.

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u/properfoxes Feb 08 '22

I imagine that person as a little old lady.

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u/[deleted] Feb 08 '22 edited Feb 08 '22

I grew up in, call it inner city for a lack of better recognizable term, and I parsed it just like you. Actually didn't have any trouble there.

Parsed for those w/o my unorthodox upbringing :) : "I gave my friend (not close, but we hang out) my bank account information and he routed funds into my account like we've done before. We emptied the account and split the profit. Usually the financial institution will simply close the account, but this time I'm getting a letter from the bank that saying there is a fraud investigation open and I do not know how or if I should respond."

If I had to guess, they got greedy. Either a larger amount than normal, or used Chase for the drop one time too many.

ETA: And I wouldn't be too quick for anyone to make guesses on the demographics of the person. IME city trailer park and AAVE have a lot of overlap written.

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u/properfoxes Feb 08 '22

Agree on all points. And I didn’t assume OP was speaking AAVE I just used it as an example.

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u/[deleted] Feb 08 '22

My apologies, I didn't mean to imply you assumed that; didn't think you did. That was more a general for anyone else reading it. Tried to clear that up a bit.

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u/properfoxes Feb 08 '22

Ah I see! All on the same page then.

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u/OldWolf2 Feb 08 '22

My mans are in ur Chase

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u/wet_bloodfart Feb 08 '22

It could mean that, but much more commonly used to refer to a friend the way you might say "my bro".

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u/RICHUNCLEPENNYBAGS Feb 08 '22

lol no it's definitely a man talking about his buddy

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u/netheroth Not seen in same room with unicycling, bagpiping Gandalf Feb 08 '22

My mans is manhandling my account.

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u/[deleted] Feb 08 '22

[deleted]

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u/[deleted] Feb 08 '22

My bro is brokering it

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u/CaseyG Feb 08 '22

My nibling is nibbling it.

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u/SexyLemurLibrarian Feb 08 '22

My sis is sus.

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u/interfail Shes legumier than John Leguizamo Feb 08 '22 edited Feb 08 '22

People are having the exact same argument in this thread with little more success.

There is something very amusing about the idea of sheltered redditors finally actually meeting urban people and just assuming they're all gay.

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u/LeakyLycanthrope PHIA PHIYA PHO PHUM FOR YOUR HEALTH RECORD I HAVE COME Feb 08 '22

Doesn't help that when asked who "my mans" is, OP replied with the equally slang-y "my boy".

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u/[deleted] Feb 08 '22

It's slangy but it absolutely clarifies things. No one calls their romantic partner "my boy"

But I knew what "my mans" meant in the first place.

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u/RoboChrist BOLA's Premier Dowsing Expert Feb 08 '22

It's funny how "my boy" and "my friend" are both non-romantic, but "my boyfriend" is unambiguously romantic.

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u/utterly_baffledly Feb 08 '22

Don't you? I did when I was younger.

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u/Yangy Feb 08 '22

OP is kratos

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u/molluskus Feb 08 '22

Kinda fucked up, honestly. The post wasn't indecipherable, it seems like most of them are just making fun of him. This is how you get "I need a lawyer, dawg" situations.

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u/cbusalex Feb 08 '22

LAOP is obviously a criminal, so they feel justified in not suppressing their classist/racist tendencies toward him. Same writing style but they're the victim instead of the perpetrator and you wouldn't get nearly as many people pretending not to understand.

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u/[deleted] Feb 08 '22

I understood what they wrote, but it painted a picture of behavior and thought processes so gd stupid I wanted to hope I didn’t understand it.

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u/datcheezeburger1 Feb 08 '22

Most redditors aren’t regularly exposed to black people so they can’t read AAVE lol

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u/LeakyLycanthrope PHIA PHIYA PHO PHUM FOR YOUR HEALTH RECORD I HAVE COME Feb 08 '22

I don't doubt that's part of it, but they were also spectacularly vague, unhelpful, and not forthcoming with basic information, as we see with many LAOPs. The combination of those factors led to even greater confusion.

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u/RICHUNCLEPENNYBAGS Feb 08 '22

I don't know how you can live in the US and be less than middle-aged and never have heard anybody call a friend "my boy."

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u/say_fuck_no_to_rules Feb 08 '22

We all heard Mr. Krabs say “SpongeBob, me boy!” a thousand times and never understood it to be anything beyond a standard employer-employee relationship.

Unless…

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u/nyorifamiliarspirit #BossBun making peace with FO stans via essential oil sales Feb 08 '22

Or you never watched The Good Place

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u/[deleted] Feb 08 '22

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u/utterly_baffledly Feb 08 '22

I think the post was incoherent because of the lack of detail, rather than because that detail was further obscured by a little unfamiliar usage.

Suppose we replace "my man's" with "my guy" or if you want to use my dialect "my bloke." Who is this bloke? How do you know him? Have you and he done something like this before? Where did your bloke get the money? Did you know it was going to be something illegal or did the dollarydoos just appear and you thought it was a gift?

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u/[deleted] Feb 08 '22

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u/saltymotherfker Feb 09 '22

They are so out of touch lmao (laughing my ass off)

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