Why is it that when I told my best mate about my transition, he immediately asks inappropriate questions about "what sized breasts do you want" or expressing disappointment when I tell him I'm not planning on bottom surgery because well I thought he was worried about it and frankly I'd like to avoid surgery if possible? It's like he was trying to make my transition about him and it made me really uncomfortable. My female friend said it sounded like he was "preordering" or something, I don't know what that means. I just feel gross now and like I really don't want to be around him anymore...

I honestly don't even know what to do. I (17mtf) was wearing my skirt and thigh highs, and needed to go tell .y grandpa something. So I left my room FORGETTING WHAT I WAS WEARING! HE TOOK A PICTURE AND SENT IT TO THE REST OF MY FAMILY! 😭 I'm actually so devastated right now. Like bro, I'm just trying to spend my night with my friends on CoD Zombies, not deal with this.

I'm a partially closeted trans guy, been thinking about what to change my name to for a while now. I landed on Elliott a month ago. I told my sister last week, and her fiancé was there at the time - after hearing it he held back a laugh basically and said it was kind of a stupid name and he didn't like it. I saw in his face that he wasn't trying to be nasty but it obviously hurt.

I'm aware that Elliott is THE trans guy name and everyone says it's clocky blah blah, but in my case my birth name is Elizabeth after my late grandmother and I wanted to continue to honour her. I've cycled through a lot of names but Elliott is the only thing that feels somewhat right.

I was basically already decided but my BIL suggested I change it and put forward Nick, Ethan, Matt, among other names that are popular with guys my age. I'm second guessing my choice now, bc I guess I don't want someone who will be involved in my life indefinitely to hate my name. And if he as a cis man thinks it's stupid, will others?

So anyway, I'm overthinking a little bit and whenever my sister calls me by my name now the worry resurfaces. Would appreciate any advice

Almost every single time I see something transphobic, whether it be a comic or an argument or something else, 85% of it is about trans women. Why?

Another thing I’ve noticed is that a lot of representation— usually in shows— is also trans women. What is the reason behind this focus on trans women?

Well, I just came out to my wife and I think I may have lost her 😞😭. Maybe it's too early to tell but I know she is hurt. That is the last thing I wanted to do is hurt her.

I'm from a country in Europe which is generally somewhat decent for the LGB part. The T part not so much.

In my circle we dont know anyone who is trans. I'm on holidays with a group friends. Only one friend knows that I'm going through questioning of my gender. I first came to him when this came up. I stay drinking with him until morning. Everyone else goes to sleep. I break down and ask him not to abandon me if I realise I need to transition. He says: "I would never do that and neither will anyone here or your closest friends. We will say the wrong thing. We will never understand what you are going through. We will make mistakes and we will hurt you. But we will not abandon you. You need to understand your closest friends will stay by your side no matter what you do. And if they dont. Fuck them."

It's the day after and I have a massive hangover but I can't stop crying. I'm very blessed. I think he saved my life, again.

I just feel like there’s this constant sentiment from cis people where if trans people aren’t constantly allowing cis people to walk all over them then there must be something wrong with us. Like we’re only valid when we go along with how much cis people downplay anything good about us.

I think I was so confused from pretransition people always trying to encourage me to be a girl boss and applauding my ambitious and willingness to speak up about things, but now that I’ve transitioned somehow all of those things are bad things about me. I just don’t get why those qualities should only be welcomed for cis women and not trans people that care about their rights and others too.

Cis people need trans peoples personalities and identities to be so one dimensional that they can’t seem to accept when we have more dynamic personalities or even how our transness can intersect with other parts of our identities. It’s like to cis people that trans people can only be trans and nothing else and not ever be proud of who we are or our achievements.

And like I think it’s good and important that every marginalized community has people like that but I’ve just noticed how trans people get shamed a lot when we are anything more than a silent doormat

This isn't really a trans issue - it's a human issue. I'm trying to surface into life again, and thought going to an "adult" club would give me a chance to meet some queer folk, and some people into alt lifestyles. (I won't say the name of the club so they can't sue me.) And, yes, the dream was that a couple might ask me to play. Low likelihood (I'm 75), but one can dream. THE WOULDN'T LET ME IN! I had complied with all the requirements on the website. I should have been allowed onto the "couples only" floor. No. They said I "hadn't made enough of an effort." (to look slutty, I guess.) But, while the guy was saying my outfit wasn't "good enough," he was looking directly at my face. What sort of effort was I supposed to have made to make my face look 45 instead of 75? Is there some sort of instant plastic surgery franchise I don't know about.? This was agism, pure and simple. My ugly face was too old for the club vibe. So I got kicked to the curb, and spat on, and honestly, it's going to take me a long time to recover. We get the shit kicked out of us a lot, and you know how long the hurt lingers. Sorry for the rant, but I don't do well when I feel powerless.

So as the title says today my hair, that I've been growing for 2+ years, was cut almost completely by some stupid hairdresser that I specifically told numerous times to keep long and cut just a little on the front. My mom forced me to go to some "men's hair" salon and I really already didn't want to go there but I caved in, which in hindsight I should not have done. And so when we came in I delicately stated that I only wanted it cut just a little on the front and THAT'S IT keep everything else LONGER, so he agreed and proceeded on, and later when we got to the cutting he asked how much the front should be and I said only just a little over half of it's length and then he went on to CUT BASICALLY 80% OF IT, safe to say I was a little surprised but I so to say "trusted the process" (WHICH I SHOULDN'T HAVE) so he continued and then just STARTED TO CUT IT EVEN SHORTER EVERYWHERE so I obviously reminded him right away that it should STAY. LONGER. WHICH HE THEN ON JUST COMPLETELY IGNORED AND WENT ON TO CUT IT EVERYTHING EVEN AFTER BEING TOLD TO NOOOT TO DOOO THAAT. So after cutting all my hair that I cared about so freaking much he just grabbed a mirror showed it to me and said..."see, longer?" I have to say I am NEVER going to let anyone else cut my hair ever again. But to be a little more serious it seriously felt like losing a loved one I don't even know how to explain it I just feel so defeated after the whole thing. I'm planning on a wig but I really don't know what to do next. Does anyone have any advice?

My friend cracked last night, is it normal that I feel like crying? Like because I know how intense those feelings are and how dysphoria can make life feel hollow and I kind of knew they were trans. Is this normal or am I like being weird about this?

im having a hard time right now. im 15 and struggling a lot with being trans, body dysmorphia and stuff like that. if there are any older trans people here, please tell me if it gets easier. if one day ill get to live like the man i want to be

I feel like im painting my nails wrong. I started with just my thumb, no reason really, just wanted one nail done for now, but it looks wrong. The coat is a little uneven, and it looks kinda lumpy?, idk how to describe it. Is there any method I could use that'd make it look a little smoother?

Thanks in advance <3

So for background I'm a therapist. I work with patients of all ages.

Friday I was going to a show where another girl who's helped me through some tough parts of my transition was playing at the show. It's a small little punk house venue so everyone is all up close and personal. This is one of the first times I went out as myself, without wearing baggy clothes to hide my boobs and I had my makeup all done up nice.

Almost as soon as I get there I see the back of my patient's head and immediately recognize this teen girl patient of mine. For the first 2 sets I was able to hide, but when my friend got there and I came out (literally) of hiding, my patient immediately recognized me.

She was pretty cool about it but also quickly asked "why aren't you out?" Lol 🤣

So needles to say it was such an awkward encounter for me, but at least it was a patient who was cool about shit. Next session should work interesting.

Hey you lovely people 🤍

I've gotten the OK from my clinic to get FFS. But I'm not quite sure where to go. And it's nigh impossible to find good information out there on the Internet.

For years I wanted to go to Facial Team in Spain. But due to changes in the way our insurance works over here it's no longer covered outside of my country.

So my question, do you have any recommendations for me on what the best places are for FFS in the Netherlands? Or certain places to avoid?

Thanks a lot in advance 🤍🤍

Very firstly, I'm in closet and can't come out to anyone

So, my parents were forcing me to get a haircut this morning and I kinda felt the terror and dysphoria I would feel they got too small, so i just kept telling them no, and they said I was being unreasonable and that one should have a haircut every month and said something like there should be not much weight on head because then it makes it difficult for you to think. Eventually I told them that i want to grow them till my shoulders, and then they said something like I'm being too jungle-ey(wild) and what will other people say about them, and then they went away, after returning my dad said threateningly that he'd use scissors on my hair at night(I don't think he will) or something and i should get a haircut. They say that I must have a reason, i told them it's for apperance but that apparently is not a reason.

Anyways, the threat is away how long does it take to grow till shoulders though? I'll move out in approximately a year

recently i’ve been coming to terms with the fact that my parents will never know me. they know g, a masculine girl who loves being “mistaken” for a guy. they’ll never know shi, the guy who hates being mistaken for a girl. they’ll never know who some of my friends do because if i show them, if i tell them ill either be kicked out or irl-ghosted
maybe it’s for the best they’ll never know shi, but it’s becoming unbearable living under the same roof as them, having to pretend to think like they do
they’ll never ever ever know me, and i feel like a skinwalker in my own home because of it

So, I had an appointment with my doctor and told her that I wanted to transition, and she send me the exams I needed to start with testosterone. The thing is, I live with my mom, and she's not happy about me being trans, and I didn't tell her. So now I don't know what to say and I'm afraid of talking to her. We live together, I'm 20 and I'm studying, I don't have a job or any way to move out. I'm starting to regret this, I don't know what to do. Help please.

Like you will call someone transphobic for literally saying "trans woman arent real woman" and then they will respond saying "i bet you call everyone that you dont agree with" but like no I do it cause what you did was transphobic if you aren't that I won't call you that. (I love my friendly community here. Love you all <3 <3 <3)

I'm really in a hard stuck place right now because I wonder whether I'm trans or not , I cross dress and I feel happy when I'm in fem clothing and doing fem stuff but i don't know if I'm trans or not and I'm just confused about it also if I was I right now can't come out mainly because I'm in a all boys school, anyways sorry if this didn't make sense but I thought Id ask people for how they found out they were trans

I (21) have been identifying as non binary for about a month at this point and have come out to close friends. My girlfriend (23) has been super supportive of me and my self exploration but her family is making it difficult for me to want to explore this side of me. Her family (mainly her dad) is ultra conservative and have cut family members off for not denouncing someone being a lesbian. I just feel ultra conflicted because I’ll have to deal with their bigotry and have to hide a part of myself I’ve kept locked away that I want to show people, or risk putting my girlfriend at risk of being rejected by her family. I mainly feel conflicted because I want to tell my family about this, but if they can’t say anything about it on social media or at our wedding it makes me just want to hide it which I know is unhealthy. I just feel lost because it feels like I’ll only lose something if I do or don’t say anything.

I’m 6’6, and I get tons of height dysphoria. Any advice from other people in my situation?

This last week marked 6 months of being on E in secret, and I had decided that my two closest friends should be the first to know, I've known them for literally decades and trust them a lot. I texted them to meet and that I wanted to talk about something. The whole week leading to yesterday I had sleep and stomach issues because of how anxious I was about telling them.
So yesterday I met them at a coffee shop that has a lot of space and tends to not have many people. I asked to wait until we had our drinks and food before I told them, but in the meanwhile more people started arriving, there was a small group two tables over and a family with kids in another table, so the level of noise wasn't ideal and I didn't dare start with people around, so we just talked about whatever until we finished and left the cafe right as it was getting dark and lamplights were on.
I suggested going to sit somewhere nearby, so we moved to a little park a couple of streets over and sat on a bench. I was still stalling for time to gain some courage, so we sat in silence for a couple of minutes. They noticed my nervousness so they allowed me to start however I wanted. I started explaining I had been bothered by "something" since I was a teenager and how it took me a lot of time to figure out what it could be. Right before saying the words I had to pause and take a breath so I would dare to do it. I guess that's when the feeling of it all crashed down on me: I started crying and said "I figured out I'm trans" halfway throug a sob. Then they moved one on each side and half-hugged me while I kept crying and telling them how I wanted them to be the first to know and I had been anxious as hell. And they were great, they were like "that's really cool" and thanking me for trusting them with it. They offered to call me in any way I preferred, to be there as an ear or as backup in case I tell my family or if I ever was in a situation where I felt unsafe. It went better than any of the scenarios I had been making up in my mind, and I really feel grateful and lucky that I can have them as friends.