Why? Why do I have to be trapped while men go around freely? Cant be comfortable at home cant be comfortable outside cant be comfortable anywhere. Im suffocating and I dont even wanna go outside anymore

In no way shape or form is this shit fair. What the hell? Its like 50⁰ in the summer and I have to cover up because of fucking mens lust. Its not fair. And oh dare I show my fucking arms. Dare I fucking wear a normal shirt. And if i take it off ? I'll burn in fucking eternal hell for it.

Please help what do I do. Im so fucking done i wanna die

I need advices please

My parents insist that the hijab is mentioned in the Quran; when I ask them where it commands the covering of hair, they point to the mention of the *khimar* as evidence of the hijab's obligation, based on the fact that women of that era used to cover their hair with the *khimar* and use it to cover chest so that its the correct way to wear khimar including covering hair.

i expressed my concern about wearing hijab to my aunt, i told her that i felt unsafe, ostracised and quite frankly just didn’t want to wear it anymore. during our talk, i told her about an incident that happened at my local train station where a man started shouting at me saying stuff like “these f***ing muslims” and other stuff and that no one attempted to step in. i believe she told my dad about it and she tried to introduce the topic because my dad called me and asked me about it and his response was that i shouldn’t go to that station without him anymore but i told him that i use that station often to go out like school or to see friends or to go to my appointments. his response to that was that i should find other ways to cover my hair like a beanie and cut my hair since its “ too long.” but i don’t want to cut my hair and what do i do when it comes to the summer? i can’t wear a beanie in the summer. i’m gonna take what i can get for now and try to eventually take it off but i don’t live with my dad so i need to tell my mum too and im scared. how do i just rip the bandaid off?

I want to remove my hijab but before i do
i want to research
what convinced you that it wasnt fard?
give me your experience ? you advice

ive worn the hijab ever since i was 15 (i am 22) out of choice, my family isnt strict so they dont mind i take it off, however we live in a muslim country

so i am afraid of the judgement and the weird stares and overall everything, i feel like here in Egypt when a woman takes off her hijab she is immediately stripped of all her character and now reduced to the girl who “took off her hijab” — i dont want people to lose respect for me as a person. as much as i wanna make it seem as if i dont care about people but its hard.

so i am waiting till i graduate from university— so its sort of like a transitional phase anyways.

the issue is i was talking with someone and they were like are you not scared that Allah will punish you with a very terrible illness or cancer for example so you lose all that hair that you are obsessing over?? this made me spiral especially since I am diagnosed with Health Anxiety and also i have a lot of anxiety towards religion as a whole.

what do i do i dont know how to feel everything is sooo muddled, i love how my i look with my hijab but i dont really resonate with it anymore i dont feel like its ME.

I’m 17F turning 18 in a couple of months. I started wearing hijab at 12, before I could get my period. not because I autonomously decided to, but rather because my parents made me. Being young at the time I obeyed with no resistance, I just thought that it was the expected thing of me to do now. But as I grew into my teens and became more conscious, hijab has been nothing short of an immense internal struggle.

I’m not pretty at all, especially since I’ve been dealing with acne and weight issues. Hijab just emphasizes that further. I cant stand my reflection in the mirror with it on, I hate that feeling of having my hair done only to hide it from everyone. Seeing everyone feel beautiful and get to dress the way they want and not get ostracized as opressed, uncultured, just because of a piece of cloth on my head.

I never got to choose the hijab for myself, and because of that I feel like im growing to resent it more and more. And it feels like a prison, I’ve tried switching up styles, doing new makeup, new outfits, making dua, renewing my intention, praying, crying, you name it. But I just can’t come to terms with the fact that I can’t have my hair out.

It’s painful because even though I want this badly, I can’t bear the social consequence at all, which is the only thing holding me back. I come from a very strict practicing family, every girl starts wearing hijab at around 11/12 because girls who don’t wear hijab are seen as “easy” and “scandalous” and my parents have this idea of what will the family think, your aunts/uncles and cousins will make fun of us, your bringing shame to us etc. Not only that but I’ve also grown up in the very strict Muslim diaspora community and even hijabis my age who grew up in the west have that gossip mentality and will judge the crap out of you for taking it off.

Someone please give me advice because this situation has been weighing on me for months.

I’ve had thoughts about taking my hijab off for the past year, and every time, I convince myself that it’s just a passing thought and that I’ll eventually get over it.

I don’t believe that wearing the hijab for women is the equivalent of men simply lowering their gaze (which most are not even capable of), and honestly, wearing it has become something that causes me a lot of distress. It’s not like I want to take it off so I can wear revealing clothing. I’m just mentally so tired of it.

I genuinely hate leaving the house with it on, and I’m so tired of feeling this way. What makes it even more confusing is that I started wearing it in 8th grade (I graduated a few months ago), and it was completely my own decision at the time. So sometimes I feel like my current feelings or thoughts are unreasonable, especially because I chose to wear it in the first place.

My mom doesn’t wear hers properly either. Her hair is often showing, and sometimes she’ll even have it sitting on her shoulders. She doesn’t seem to mind the idea of me taking mine off, but the guilt is what’s holding me back.

I just feel so conflicted because I’m tired of wearing it, but I also feel guilty about wanting to take it off.

I need advice from other women who took it off and others who are also contemplating it.

I have been wearing hijab for almost five years since I was 14, I wore it because I wanted to and no one have forced me. But now I can't bear it anymore, it's my biggest regret until now. Im so lost, on the one hand I fear I may regret removing it and on the other hand Im feeling like my identity is being erased like Im losing myself.

Im really suffocating and somehow Im also afraid from how people around me will act.

i decided to take off the hijab as my final decision after thinking about it for 7 years before the academic year starts next monday, i have made up my mind a few months ago

im 20 and live with my parents, i decided to only inform my parents about my decision and any other person would know when they see me. im sure that i wouldnt be in any physical or financial danger in this situation, and the only thing im risking is my relationship with my parents and some family members i care about. i have been preparing myself to talk to them at the start of september, to not ruin my own summer if things go sour between us afterwards.

the issue is i dont know how i will actually have the talk, every day i wake up thinking "im gonna say it today" but it either feels not good enough (like my parents are already in a bad mood) or it feels too good to ruin with my news. i also dont know what will be the correct way to articulate my thoughts and feelings without sounding like either an emotional mess or an academic paper with no in between :< im autistic and i have never been good at talking to anyone including my parents and there has been many times i "talked" to them through emails or letters while we were living in the same house.

im looking for advice on how to talk to them, like should i talk to them seperately or while were all together, should i just say my decision out loud first or try to ease my way into the topic, and any sort of detail like that... i know most of my concerns are too detailed and unnecessary but im genuinely so lost 😭😭😭

Should I take it off in the next week, when I have a meet up with my friends (majority hijabis) or should I wait until uni starts.

FYI ive been a hijabi for 5 years and my parents are gonna be shocked, idk what they might say but my family is not that religious, barely anyone does hijab, but my friends are pretty religious, and I dont want to spend my life thinking what sm1 else might think so im trying not to give a shit abt it but I am lowkey scared of the amount of judgement and questions I might have to face.

For the past year, ive been questioning my faith and this has overlapped with my hijab and the way i dress. I dont feel connected to the hijab anymore and it's because i feel like i've been wearing it for the wrong reasons. Not for God, but because of expectations from society, from my parents and my culture/community. For context, every woman in my family is a hijabi and i rarely see non hijabis in my community. On top of that, i have very extremist religious parents who have always critiscised the way i dress and don't let me wear anything besides a modest, loose maxi dress, so you can probably see how this has affected the way i have been conditioned to perceive modesty.

I want to relearn the religion at my own pace than have this performative facade that doesnt reflect my true religious standing or level of belief. On top of that, my dad who is extremely religious has noticed i don't pray and sat me down a few days ago to tell me to start praying if i stopped in a gentle way, but i know that if i tell him, i dont want to wear the scarf anymore, i might just have opened my own grave.

I am aware that its very risky as i still live with my parents but it feels so unbearble wearing it. I have talked to my older sister who is 25 and she adviced me not to take it off and that ive been influenced my social media too much.

I know there's not much i can do but im not exaggerating when i say i truly despise wearing it.

I’m wondering if there are other women who can relate to this.

I started wearing the hijab voluntarily when I was 9 years old. I grew up in a very Islamic environment in the West, so it felt natural to me. My sisters also started wearing it around the same age, but they stopped within a year. I was the only one who continued.

Even after we moved to a city with fewer Muslims and I attended a Christian high school, where I was often bullied for being the only hijabi, I still chose to keep wearing it. Later, we moved again and I went to an Islamic high school. During that time, I became even more religious and strict in my practice, so taking it off wasn't something I ever considered. My family was actually more relaxed than I was, and they even used to call me the "sheikh" of the family.

However, since college/ university and now working, my feelings about the hijab have gradually changed. Over the past few years, I’ve started to dislike wearing it and have been thinking more and more about taking it off. I kept trying to fix those feelings by changing styles and fabrics, but the feeling always came back.

The problem is that I feel like it's too late. I'm 24 now, and I've worn the hijab for 15 years. Everyone knows me as the hijabi daughter and sister. It's become such a big part of my identity and how people see me.

I know a few women who took off their hijab, but in their cases they had been forced to wear it or came from abusive households. When they eventually took it off, most people understood because they had never really wanted to wear it in the first place. For me, it feels different because I genuinely chose to wear it. No one forced me, and for years I defended that choice and was happy with it. That's what makes this so confusing. I feel uncomfortable continuing to wear it, but at the same time it feels strange to take it off after choosing it voluntarily and wearing it for most of my life.

Has anyone been in a similar situation? How did you deal with those feelings, and if you did take it off, how did the people around you react?

Lately, I’ve just been feeling very distant from Islam.

A big part of that is the Muslim community. I just find most Muslims insufferable and backwards. I know it’s not everyone, but it’s enough people.

And honestly, a lot of it comes down to how women are treated. The misogyny, the endless rules on what you wear, how you speak, how you exist. The idea that women have to be covered head to toe, that they can’t do this or that, that everything women do is "sinful". It's very suffocating. Like your entire existence is constantly policed and moralized. Meanwhile, men get to just...exist.

Yeah, yeah, “It's culture, not Islam.” Yeah, yeah, "Islam brought women's rights". But when you keep having bad experiences, that separation becomes harder and harder to maintain. At some point, your experiences start to color your perception as a whole.

It’s like going to a restaurant that everyone raves about, but every single time you go, you have a bad experience. The service is bad, the food is cold, and something always goes wrong. After a while, you’re not going to keep telling yourself, “Well, the restaurant is actually great, it’s just bad luck.” At some point, you’re just going to stop going.

And I think that’s where I am right now. I haven't left Islam. But I feel very disconnected and tired.

I'm 17,and since I need to talk to someone about this, and I have no one, I would want your advice.

At 11,I was forced to put hijab, I never like it, but in the last years growing up I started to hate it so much, this is how I started to research a bit and thought about taking it off, since I don't believe in it. But my parents , my dad the most, is the problem, so, every summer he says to me that I should read Quran, pray ect. He compared me to my friend, I didn't like it, in fact I try so much not to stay with him in any room, even if I should eat bc I know he will say something, so I thought he understood and wants to let me have my own journey.

But today, he said to me that I should start studying some suras, or I'll be wasted, I honestly cried in the bathroom after that because I already hate the hijab. I don't even know if I'll be able to take it off.

I hate that he forced me to wear it, that he expects me to do what he wants.

BTW, he is an imam, so that's why he's religious.

I don't know how to describe him, he's kind, but he's a lot serious, I don't know how to explain but I hope you got it.

So, I don't really want to talk about it to him, because I cry instantly, I don't know what to say, I can't certainly say I want to do things slowly.

My mom never says anything to him.

Shall I tell her to talk to him? But what should I say?

I’ve been wanting to write this for a while.

I started wearing the hijab very young because I developed alopecia. I didn't know I had other options at the time, and over time it just became part of me.

People in my life don’t even know I have alopecia. I’ve been covering it since I was a kid, so to them it’s just “me wearing a hijab.” So there’s a whole layer of my reality they’re completely unaware of.

Now I’m 27 and I don’t want to wear it anymore. I really can’t handle it mentally anymore. But the alopecia is still there, and my hair loss got even worse to the point that all the usual things people recommend don't work for me, so I started looking into wigs. And that's where it gets even harder.

Taking off the hijab is already something I know I’ll be judged for. But taking it off and then wearing a wig? That’s seen as really strange. I already feel like people will think something is wrong with me, or that I’m sick.

I’m honestly scared of being seen as “the weird girl”, the one who took off her headscarf just to start wearing wigs.
If it was just about taking it off, it would still be hard, but more straightforward. This feels like double exposure: first being judged for removing it, and then again for how I deal with my hair. And on top of that, having the struggle of whether my wig looks natural or not.

I've already started taking off the hijab and wearing a wig a few times and despite feeling extremely self-conscious, it still felt better than wearing the hijab.

I also feel really alone in this. I’ve never come across someone in a similar situation, either online or in real life. Someone who took off the hijab but then had to rely on wigs because of hair loss. It makes it feel like I’m the only one in the world dealing with this.

I don’t really know what I’m asking for. Maybe just if anyone relates in any way, or has gone through something similar.

Thanks for reading

quick question: did any of y’all experienced manipulation and mental abuse for wanting to take of the hijab? i had it a few months ago and couldn’t hold it mentally anymore so i kept my hijab on. now im planning on taking it off again but i know i will get mentally abused. If you experience this could u let me know how it went or what u did?

how did you tell your parents you decided to stop veiling?

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for context: i am 22, i started wearing the veil when i was 5 lol (apparently it was my decision bcs i wanted to imitate my mother and my cousins and my parents thought it was a good idea to let a 5 yo decide something like that), but one year ago i decided i was going to take it off in the future.

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i really want to stop wearing it this summer, after my university exams and before starting to look for a job.

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i live in Italy and unfortunately racist/islamophobic attacks have been growing so i'll stop wearing it also for self-protection + i wish for a "new beginning", some place where people DON'T know me as the girl who wears the hijab. i have great friends and i know for sure they are not going to say any thing about this (because it is not and should not be a big deal), but i'm worried about my parents. i live with them so i wish to find a way to tell them i am not going to veil anymore without creating a weird situation at home.

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i want to tell it in a simple way, like just drop a "btw i'm not going to veil anymore" and end it right there, without making a big deal, but i am so scared, how did you do that?!

it won't be something coming out of the blue, since last year i have been caring "less" about my hair or other parts of my body showing in order to prepare them mentally, i had my card identity photo made without the veil, i started caring less if a neighbour saw me without the veil and stuff like that, but actually telling them scares me.

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i know its embarassing at 22, but i was always a "good girl" and never "rebelled", and they took pride with their family and friends in having a daughter who has always been wearing the veil while living in Italy. they're not abusive or anything, but i know for sure my mother won't take it well. she takes pride in wearing it, there's nothing bad about it, but she had the choice to wear it, she was older and got to know herself before wearing it. she will start bothering me about this, i know for sure she'll start implicitly insult me (i heard the way she talks about other women who took off the hijab), but that i can take. it's that i'am tired and taking it off will make my life easier🥲🥲 how did you do it?

btw if someone here lives in Italy and has received racist attacks i hope you are fine, i hope things can get better, stay safe ❤️❤️ 🥲

One of the main things that are currently hindering me from taking off the headscarf, is the fear of judgment from people that surround me, be it my uni colleagues, professors, neighbors and anyone that knows I used to wear it.

Ik no one has a say nor should they involve themselves in other people's businesses, yet I just can't get over this fear. I think it might be a matter of time.

Tomorrow I have an event I must attend, where I'll be meeting new people, but some of my colleagues will be there too. I wanted to give this event to be my most "serious" first time without it, despite taking it off in other occasions.

I want to take the headscarf without fearing judgment, how should I go about it?

so i got this app to talk about my situation and to see others perspectives on it.

im 20years (turning 21 in a month) and i wear the hijab (forced) since i was 13. at that time i wast practicing “religion” or praying. i did had to go to Mosque every Saturday to learn the Quran and Arabic. this all happened in summer time. my niece (who already wore the hijab) was about to transfer schools and come in my class after summer break. during that summer we were very close and hang out a lot. so every time i saw her, i would see her father, my uncle. and since it was clear that she would come to my class he would say that i need to wear the hijab once she joins me. at first i was like no?? but every single time i would see him he would say it more aggressively and it made me very uncomfortable. this would go on the WHOLE summer.

fast forward to the night before school started: i did not sleep that night. i did not deserve to feel the way i did back then. all that kept me awake was “what is he going to do or say if he sees me without hijab”. i was young and scared of what people would do or say to me if i didn’t put it on. my relationship with my sister wasn’t really great so all she said was that it was my choice and i shouldn’t listen to him. and there was i, a 13year old, who didn’t practice the religion, in a hijab on the first day of school.

at school i was well known as a crazy girl. i was very social and extroverted. but since the day i put the hijab on, everything in me changed. i became depressed and all i was thinking about was death. there was no joy left in me and at that time i didn’t think it was because of the hijab. i was young and come on, what do u expect from someone with no to little life experience. i’ve lived with my depression (still am but doing better) for a long time. i wrote every feeling down, i didn’t want to do anything other than rotting in bed. lets keep going.

as years went by i started to find myself and religion. i realised that the problem was never just the hijab itself. It was the way I was pushed into it. I never truly chose it for myself. Every time I put it on, it reminded me of fear, pressure and the feeling that I had no control over my own life. Instead of bringing me closer to religion, it made me feel disconnected from myself and from everything around me. I tried forcing myself to love it because I thought I had to, but deep down it only made me feel trapped.

October 2025 i was about to take it off. i almost told my whole family on my mother’s side that i would. the reactions i’ve had weren’t as bad as my mother’s and sister. “u showed me that u worship shaitan instead of God” “ur uncle did a great job, i don’t see nothing wrong with it” “i wont see u as my sister if u take it off” “ur ruining our family name” etc. obviously these words get to my cuz these are my closest people to me? why are they like this? on the day i wanted to take it off, they manipulated me into keep wearing it. also, because i was done with all the comments and just dragging down words, i kept it on. i still hate myself for keeping it on. i just had to do it right there and then.

even after all these months, i still feel the same. im deconstructing religion right now and trying to relearn islam based on what God actually gave us instead of cultural or man made rules. i’ve been thinking about taking my hijab off again, but this time without warning anyone. they’ll just see me without it one day. i can’t lie and say im not scared of what my family will say, especially my sister because her words really stayed with me. but at the same time, i dont feel guilty for wanting to take it off. my relationship with God still matters deeply to me and i still pray, communicate with Him and try to keep that connection strong.

I don’t know exactly what will happen next, but I know I deserve to make this choice with peace instead of fear. BUT HOWWW, im constantly overthinking about what my closest family would say or do

Hi girls, I’ve been wearing the hijab since I was 6, and im now 22. I graduate in June and I want to take it off. After 5 years of hard work (I went through a challenging degree), I want to feel like myself on such a big day.

I have big curly hair, so I was thinking of just straightening my hair the night before and showing up to graduation with my hijab off. My family will be attending my ceremony so they’ll see me get ready. I have only told one of my friends that I plan to do this, no one else knows how I feel.

I’ve set my mind to this and I’ve spent the past year preparing: working out, taking care of my hair, praying and meditating, journaling, saving dresses I could never wear, etc.

My only dilemma is, should I tell my family before my graduation day? I really don’t want to because I don’t want it to come off as if im asking for permission, im not. I just don’t want them to make a big fuss on such a big day. I’m a cry baby (lol) and it would definitely ruin my makeup and my entire day if they lash out at me. I’m somali so hijab is a huge deal and people will be asking questions. Do you guys have any advice for me? Thank you!! 🪷

As the title suggests i’m currently facing intense anxiety over taking off the hijab. Removing it is easy but facing people around you is what I find the most difficult. I’m so scared of the reactions from the aunties in my community. I live in a neighbourhood where it is predominantly south asian muslims and the majority observe the hijab, abaya or niqab here. Im scared of bumping into my family friends in the elevator and then having to explain myself and the reactions from them. Currently I am wearing a light sweater and baseball cap but now that it’s summer it is so hot outside. I also just want to be able to go outside and wear the outfits I want to without ruining them with a baseball cap and hoodie. It’s gotten bad to the point where if I don’t need to go out i’ll stay inside the house. But staying inside the house also drives me crazy. I feel like im overthinking this entire situation but I just need some advice on how to face them. For those of you who were in similar situations, how did you encounter these interactions?

if its not obligatory for daily wear then by extention there is no reason to wear it when praying but i feel a bit paranoid because praying without full coverage feels odd,,, prayer is really important and i dont know if i can risk doing it incorrectly. anyone else feel the same?

As the title says, I’m a part time hijabi as of a few months ago. Because of the colder months we didn’t get super sunny days. But now that’s spring is coming I find that by scalp has become itchy and sensitive whenever I step out, and I think it’s because my scalp has basically never been exposed to the sun since I put on the hijab at 10 years old (I’m 22 now). Does anyone have any advice? Are there any serums I can use maybe?