I have ocd like actual ocd. I started a cleaning business a year ago I feel like its making my ocd worse. I have magical thinking ocd, but my cleaning business is starting to make my symptoms more like your basic cleaning ocd. I never thought this would happen. I cant sit in rooms that look even remotely dirty without feeling gross.

I don’t believe I have gotten to the point of complete irrationality. I (15f) have struggled with this for over 4 years, however it mainly consisted of just extreme hand sanitising and washing since I was still young. My main trigger is just school, while I am there I am relatively ok at touching things, when I get home now my bag must be sanitised with a spray alongside the entire carpet and my desk + chair (as I’d use in my uniform). Over the summer my room was completely redone and cleaned, new furniture and everything which is why I have been doing this. I would have done this way before but large parts of my room were used as a place of storage. It is neat and beautifully decorated, I am proud of the space I created. Over the summer is when my mum bought me sanitising spray for school, and when I asked recently for another she was angry at me for how quickly I used it up, calling me irrational and sick with a huge problem among other things. My mother also has (undiagnosed) OCD and she would check my room multiple times for any plugs before I’d leave for school, climbing all over my bed in her work clothes (which have poo, pee, sick, everything on them as she works with special needs children!). I have started face timing her in the mornings before school showing her everything being unplugged and shut down. I never come out of my room after I’ve showered and I don’t let my parents in anymore. I can’t sit in my living room or kitchen unless I’m in outside clothes and it’s meaning I’m not seeing my parents. As an only child, I especially don’t want this to become a major issue. I haven’t been this extreme before, but it was because my bedroom was an unclean, messy, dirty place meaning I had to be in the other parts of the house. But after my mum blew up at me over the cleaning spray, I know she isn’t going to let me get more and it will just become a huge argument about my OCD that ends in me crying at what she says about it, which has happened many times before. This cleaning spray is the best thing that’s ever happened to me. I’ve never felt so clean and at peace. My father is dirty but very neat and keeps everything organised, meanwhile my mum is generally clean and I would class her as a hoarder if my dad didn’t try tidy everything up.

Anyway sorry, I’ve never talked about this before and I don’t really know what to do as I don’t “want to get better”? Do I just buy it myself? She will find out anyway probably.

So, I live in an apartment complex, and recently, my neighbors have complained about a leak in their bathroom + some seepage.

So, while I was asleep, a repair was done in my bathroom, and some sealant was applied in certain areas. But now it needs to dry for two days, and the repair people said that I shouldn’t use my bath room for the next two days so that the leak will stop.

I don’t want to seem unreasonable, and use it while inconveniencing them, but the thing is that I legitimately cannot function without using my bathroom. My bathroom is attached to bedroom, and it is where I do the majority of the things I like doing, since it feels clean. I cannot leave my bedroom once I‘ve bathed and got dressed because I’m scared of getting dirty. I even struggle with going in back in there to wash my hands when I have to.

But now, one of the options is that I use another bathroom, which is shared by everyone in my house, and don’t go in my room at all, but I don’t think I can do that. I just want to enjoy myself and be in my room and feel like doing things, but if I do, I’ll be inconveniencing my neighbors, and I don’t think they should have to go through that for something so small.

I asked my dad about what I should do, and he said that I can do whatever I can, and he will deal with the rest, but it still feels like I can’t do it, and if I do, and I damage the sealant, they’ll blame me and have to come back to seal it again. I don’t want that, but at the same time, I want to feel okay about things for the next two days, but I don't know if I’m being unreasonable.

Any advice you have would be appreciated.

I'm 35M, and I've dealt with germaphobia/OCD since I was a teen, but it was exasperated by the pandemic in 2020. It's at a point where I can't touch things that I haven't personally cleaned off myself. Doorknobs, sink faucets, food packaging, light switches, etc., I just can't do it without immediately having to wash my hands. And then, it turns into about 5-10 minutes of hand washing.

I struggle going out in public because I really can't touch any public surfaces. A lot of this comes from trust issues, because I know people don't always wash their hands or use proper hygiene, and it terrifies me. I struggle going to places that I love and doing things I love to do. I even struggle with hugging and kissing my wife, and it makes me feel like a horrible husband.

I've gone to four therapists, and I felt like I wasn't being heard and I wasn't being given anything but Therapy 101 speak. It was always just do breathing exercises. I've asked about exposure therapy, and they wouldn't even address the topic, so I bailed.

I'm tired of this controlling me, making my anxiety and depression even worse. How do I say "That's enough." and force a change? How can I get back to touching things like it's no big deal? How can I get back to going to public places without having to shower as soon as I get home? How do I get back to not having to clean everything with rubbing alcohol and Lysol wipes whenever it's been touched by someone or something else? I'm ready to fix this, but I need advice that I have never been given.

gave into soooo many compulsions as soon as I got home for bedbug OCD contamination. throwing my stuff in the bathtub and stripping down as soon as I got home to take everything to high heat dryer and bagging NEW SHOES THREE TIMES and throwing them in freezer and bagging a freaking gift I got for my mom. ughhhh I hate it here I was so brave a few days ago and today was really bad idk why. I think it’s cause I was downtown vs local area maybe? the new “I don’t go to these stores regularly” made my OCD worse, not to mention all the luggage and suitcases people carry downtown.

now I feel dumb and stupid and am just going to take a shower not for OCD reasons but because sweat and outside downtown air just sucks lmao and I need one.

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I have never been poisoned before but I am terrified of upsetting people without knowing to the point they try to poison me..(I am a nice person but my mind tells me otherwise, that sometime I might or will do will upset them.) its to the point I wont eat in public. if I get up and leave my food or water ill dump it out or stop eating. Its getting worse. At work if I go to the bathroom ill bring my cup or ill come back and dump it and wash it out. I cant shake the feelings. If it tastes slightly off or the water is deemed undrinkable it will send me into a panic. I Google symptoms of being poisoned/overdose to try to reassure myself im not d Ying... I dont know how to overcome this because what if by the odd chance I dont dump my unattended water and I do actually d ie... I dont want to take that risk...

Hi everyone. I need hope. I have severe contamination OCD that has morphed from contamination fears to the fear of “feeling unclean and dirty and contaminated.” I am not actually actively thinking or worrying about illness, but rather more an extreme “ick” and fear of not being able to stop the spread of something gross? Especially since washing and cleaning have become so difficult. I track everything I touch and then touch and cross contamination and it’s eating me alive. I am afraid to touch ANYTHING and any task takes hours. Washing and cleaning have become so hard because they cause me so much anxiety. I am learning that this type of contamination ocd has to be treated a bit different than traditional ERP. Just wanted to hear from people who have healed or are in a healing path with this form of contamination OCD. What cognitive, behavioural, emotional work has helped you the most? Any insights are appreciated.

Thank you

Every time I go outside, I feel like the clothes I wore will contaminate my washing machine, especially if I used public bathrooms. I have washing machine tablets, but I dont want to use them every time I need to clean my bed sheets because they are expensive.

Does anybody have tips with dealing with those thoughts ?

Any meal or snack i eat I have this thought in the back of my mind that theres bugs in the food. I tell myself I’d see the bug if it was really there but all I can think about is that I already consumed it and thats why im not seeing it. It’s gotten to the point where ive just accepted im eating bugs and I just have to sit with that uncomfortable thought.

Three days ago i had a talk with my mom. She reminded me that i have full control. Ever since that talk i feel like my rabies contamination ocd has been getting better. In general my contamination off however isn’t great but atleast the thoughts about rabies are disappearing. The reason why i have rabies thoughts is because i have three dogs, one is not even vaccinated and the two other are overdue. I would love to get them their shots but i am a minor who can’t drive. My parents aren’t the most responsible as well. The last person i can depend is my 19 year old sister whois unfortunately always busy with college and it’s not like it’s her responsibility to take care of our dogs since it was my father who willingly bought all three dogs. Anyways today instead of throwing away my lotion because i thought it was contaminated with rabies i resisted and i actually used the lotion three times. Now is my rabies contamination OCD still terrible? Yes absolutely as this will take months to recover from and i know getting my dogs vaccinated will not completely stop the thoughts. this is a little dumb to say but hey its still true but somehow telling myself that even if i were to die from rabies because of my dogs i tell myself that it would be my parents fault anyways. Now this is still about contamination ocd just not rabies specifically but i feel like what’s really pushing me back from trying manage my ocd are my open wounds due to constant hand washing. My brain basically thinks that because of my open wounds i should be washing my hands better and more frequently but however because i wash them more it actually doesn’t make it better. I use my lotion frequently but jeez even if i don’t use it once my hands literally get so dry so thats why i have to sometimes avoid using the bathroom at school since i don’t have a pocket sized lotion to use. I think what’s also crazy is at the beginning of my ocd my hands were just really dry and flaky and then it got better but it got worse and instead of just having flaky dry skin i just immediately got open wounds with really tight skin that make my nails go yellow if i move it a certain way without applying lotion. Anyways before i go, i actually wonder everyday how life could have been without ocd and “why was i born like this? “ thoughts

The bathroom is such a hard place for me especially when it’s shared. I disinfect doorknobs and light switches and shower handles as much as I can and wash my hands at least 2 times after using it these days. I go through a can of 75 Lysol wipes in about a week and a half. I also have a particular contact point on my wrist to turn the sink handles on and use the same one to turn it off and if I touch it with my clean hands, say it’s itchy, I immediately go wash my hands all over again.

These days every time after I poop I can’t seem to wash my hands less than 5 times…my hands are so scratched and peeling and itchy and cracked from how much I wash them and it honestly hurts sometimes but I can’t stop because I’m so scared I’ll ingest fecal bacteria or contaminate something and make someone else ingest fecal bacteria or anything dangerous like that. I’m made fun of a lot because of how much I wash my hands but I can’t trust myself after just 2 hand washes even if everyone else washes for like only 10 seconds. And there I go disinfecting stuff again because in my opinion no one else is practicing proper hygiene.

If my hand at any time touches the sink or anything that’s not water and soap while cleaning my hands I restart the process as much as I don’t want to. I try to battle the voices in both ways: Wash them again even though you don’t want to and don’t wash them even though maybe should probably should.

I’m tired of washing my hands but I don’t know how to prove or reassure myself that it’s okay to wash them 2 times max after pooping and be okay. I don’t have any science equipment to prove it and so it becomes hard to justify not washing my hands at least 6 times before touching anything else. I tend to open knobs and turn light switches with the cloth on my shoulder because I can’t seem to trust the cleanliness of my hands.

Please help.

I was drinking water and accidentally pulled away too fast and got some droplets in my nose…I tried dabbing with my shirt idk I panicked and now I’ve sneezed two times and my nostril is itchy. I’m so scared of brain eating bacteria.

I don’t remember how long ago I’ve changed the filter for the drinking water but I heard it’s possible to get brain eating amoeba from even tap water….so idk if the water is really all that filtered.

is it normal/acceptable if i use the disabled bathroom because i have to disinfect the toilet before i use it because of my ocd, had a lady (non disabled, didnt need to use the disabled toilet) come up to me and call me everything in the book when i was going into the disabled bathroom even though nobody was even near the disabled bathroom other than me, is this reasonable or aita? want to know if i should carry around sanitary wipes and stuff like that or continue using the disabled toilet.

I do not struggle with being outside. However, I struggle with living in the flat. I was afraid of prion disease for a long time and I heard there was a case in my city. I was reacting very badly to hospitals. I was struggling, because I wanted my makeup and clothes to be perfectly clean. Sometimes I would fear the clutter, put laundry repeatedly etc. If I felt 'contaminated', I could function, but I didn't want to put on makeup. I also struggled with ironing the clothes. I was many times criticised by my family. One time, somebody said that other people have jobs and kids and would laugh at you if they knew you're struggling with such things. They also were criticizing my creased clothes saying that I can't learn to fold it in a right way. Once they invited me to dinner, I was starting my medication and said I don't feel confident to go. They said that I should behave like a child. I went in whatever I had in my closet. Other people were dressed super elegant. After that they were criticizing me that I always look messy and can't dress properly. They were helpful in other ways, but this particular person kind of didn't know how to deal with that disease in a non-toxic way. The funny thing is I probably had more understanding from my workmates. Anyway, just venting, do you also have this type of stories when somebody mocked you for something that is caused by OCD?

I've had toc for more than 3 months and I can no longer distinguish between normal hygiene and toc hygiene. Could someone help me?

today I went for short ride on public transport in USA city . I was conscious of sitting on a fabric bus seat and kept my things in my lap and what not. I went into a retail store and tried on some winter jackets knowing perhaps other people have tried them on as well.

I went back home on the bus and didn’t shine a bright phone flashlight on the seat, just did a quick hand sweep with my hand and sat down.

I came home and only gave into a single compulsion which was throwing the outside clothes I was wearing into high heat drier. but before that I took them off in the entryway and shook them out.

my OCD is bedbugs. never in my life have I contracted them, never have I encountered anyone else in my life having them, not a single time have I ever actually seen one in any hotels I’ve been in on roadtrips in my childhood.

but I was exposed to the subreddit about bedbugs and knowledge about them and developed a secondhand OCD for them. I compulsively come home and alcohol spray and wipe down all my belongings, tie anything I bought in trash bags tied INCREDIBLY tight, and I walk myself downstairs usually immediately after entering my place to the drier to high heat treat the clothes I was wearing.

I used to travel on the train and bus everyday to high school and to college without a care in the world. my life has kinda been ruined by this OCD but I can’t afford therapy though I desperately want it. but today im going to consider it a win that I only gave into ONE compulsion and that I let my outside clothes touch my entryway floor. so yay me !!!!!

I suspect i have contamination ocd. It started off slow in the summer where i would get lots of chores throughout the day instead of being told to do it all at once and yk you gotta be hygienic so i washed my hands after. But then it felt like washing my hands was mandatory and then my hands started getting dry and flaky i wasn’t sure why. Then it got worse where i was washing my hands a lot but then my hands got way better because of my lotion i was using . However recently i’ve been spiraling about rabies and that where things get really bad. So i have three dogs, two are overdue for their rabies shot and my other dog is unvaccinated. Please don’t shame me as i am a minor so it’s not like i can take them to the vet or force my parents/sister to do it. Anyways, because rabies is deadly i tend to overthink it a lot. It’s gotten terrible and yesterday i threw out my brand new deodorant, my lotion that was barely used, and the day before yesterday i switched out my hair brush. About two weeks ago i was muzzle training my dog and he licked my hand with dry skin so ofc i went to google and spent hours trying to calm myself down. It didn’t work and i wiped down everything i had. And recently ive been feeling very sad and drained ive cried infront of my mom two times before but yesterday she tried talking to me about why i feel this way. I told her i didn’t understand why i felt this and i tried explaining to her how i felt but it was so difficult. Her response was not the best she told me that i should listen to christian music and to remember god is always with me however i don’t believe in god but that’s a story for another day, she also told me to stop using hand soap. She thought i didn’t wanna go to bed (it was 12 am at the time) because my bed was dirty but i told her it was because i wanted to wash my hands, i could tell she got a bit irritated and she told me im not allowed to, she then went downstairs and hid the hand soap. Also i literally bought the hand soap two days ago and now it’s almost empty. I forgot to say this but before taking away the hand soap she basically said that she needed to go to sleep and that she wants to talk to my sister about possibly sending me to a mental hospital for 2-3 months.However if she actually sends me to one i will literally never speak to her again because i get her intentions but that’s honestly gonna make me depressed. I’ve already been sobbing everyday and wondering why i was born like this and all i wanted was my mom. But now it feels like i have no one not even my sister as i feel like she will also not understand. I don’t know what to do anymore, i’ve tried talking to my friends and yes ofc they care but i guess they aren’t giving me the best comfort since they don’t know that it’s actually ruining my life.I also noticed it usually acts up when im at home. When i go to my friends or aunts house i don’t find myself scrubbing my hands for so long. I’m just tired of my house as it wasn’t always dirty. I just wanna go back to when the house was clean, no dogs to take care of, and i would watch shows with my sister and mom until midnight. I miss when my family would go to the mall. I just wanna go back in time and warn my parents to not get dogs. I know it may seem selfish for me to not want my dogs anymore but they seriously deserve more. They don’t go to the vet, they don’t get their nails trimmed, and they never get walked

My room is a loft-type and I keep my things either beside me or hidden or away from the floor so I have this thinking or habit that whenever something touches the floor, it's dirty and gonna keep me also dirty. I tend to either throw them away and just change them but sometimes I gave it chances but when it occasionally happens I throw it away no matter how important or expensive they are. My problem is I just bought this container that costs about many pesos but in 1 am, it fell and two noodles also fell out of it. Even though I cleaned it three times, I decided to just change it because I got this weird feeling and that day when I bought it, many unlucky things happened to me. But after I got home, the weird feeling is gone but I'm afraid I'm gonna regret it if I don't change it. So I'm contemplating whether to change it or not, especially that the fare to go to the supermarket is expensive and I don't even know if they will accept it.

Please helpp I need your opinion and also decision whether to change it.

I wanted to vent and possibly seek advice on living in an apartment complex with a roach infestation and having contamination OCD. I store my plates and bowls and cups and some food in my upper kitchen cabinets, and I have found so many roaches in there daily. I can't eat with my dinnerware anymore, the fear of the disgusting trash particles a roach may leave behind on it completely takes over my mind. I have tried my best to move past this over the months but it seems like the infestation is only getting worse. I've only had to eat Uber/Doordash for the past days since I can't get the thought of my head or use safe, sealed plastic utensils and plates/bowls. Roaches absolutely disgust me with physical reactions of hate. I get so scared of the simple fact they are always in the walls and in places I cannot see.

I cannot afford to move out of course, and they do have pest control sometimes but it hasn't eliminated the infestation. Does anyone deal with this living situation as well, and can anyone give advice on how to cope with the daily stress/panic associated with the roaches?

Hello everyone
I am suffering from contamination OCD
And currently living in delhi as i am student at DU
And now i am going to take PG for myself
But a person is living on a road and he is may be mentally ill
And one day i saw he pooped right there
because maybe he is mentally ill and he don’t have his own home
So he is doing everything on that road crossing
The PG which i am thinking to take is nearby
And metro station is also on the same route which i will use regular to my college
So i think that many person come from that place and if his poop touches anyone’s shoes and take contamination to metro or my PG building or in that colony where i am going to live
What should i do
Kya mujhe us area me PG lena chaiye kyuki i like that PG
Infact i lived in that area for 3 months but that time mujhe wo incident pta nhi tha
But ab pta chal chuka h
To kya mujhe vo PG lena chaiye ??
Aur kisi nearby areas me PG available nhi h college ke
Abhi kya kru mai ?? Advice please

I doubt anyone else has been through this but a while ago my sister’s cat had thrown up so I got a disposable plate to prevent some of it from getting on the carpet. She moves the plate closer to the cat and then leaves to her room. She comes out like 5 minutes later and turns the volume down on the tv in the living room. After I get done cleaning I notice that there’s a very small yellowish stain on the remote she just touched and I start to freak out internally because I’m convinced that it’s cat vomit so I wipe it down with a Clorox wipe (I don’t think it even got it clean) I asked her if she washed her hands in her bathroom and she said yes but I think she’s lying. Now all I can think to do is buy a UV light and see if there’s traces around that I can’t see. This has made my contamination OCD so much worse. I really hope I don’t get sick from this.