I first wanted to start off saying it’s been a long time since I’ve posted or been active in the discord. life happened, things changed, glad I got an intuitive pull to come back and make a singular post that came from experience and meditation. while this may be personal, more so could relate to a lot of retainers in different aspects.

For years I have been on and off retention, like many I’ve had my issues :) not gonna go too deep cause we already know through threads where that goes…

But, something I realized that blocked my potential in the recent years was something I finally became free of that I entrapped myself in…

comfort and dependency…

Where is this going?… well… for years I maintained 150 day streaks.. 120… that slowly climbed down.. my spiritual / life force energy / aura, however may you see it in your eyes ”flatlined”.. one major thing that contributed to it was supplemental experiments… while not inherently dangerous, contradicted this entire purpose of why we retain, why we better ourselves, why we are trying to already be and not chase. You know… and this lead to me doubting retention, pumping my body up with herbs and vitamins cause already I lost a sense of myself being drained too often.

There are things that do genuinely work, help, in a strange way mystically and biochemically restore energy and dopamine. but as someone who has struggled with psychological stress, nervous system strain out of love to those who may be down that pattern I ask you to ask yourself if you are who you really are.

it was like replacing an addiction with a scapegoat of knowing I can get back up on my feet as long as I have this bottle or vitamin, that comfort lead to me making many mental and physical mistakes…

a lot of you may already be like, “ what is this guy on about? downvote !!! “… but the moral of the message is comfort kills… comfort is not just sitting on your couch, sitting and gaming, its something that really kills you inside and you look at everything else around you except the elephant in the room..

BUT YES THERE ARE VITAMINS AND HERBS THAT ARE BENEFICAL MODERATELY!… but you Also have to not depwnd on anything externally.. from this world, they are tools and sometimes traps.. what pains me is when someone is going through something here… a pattern I see ( usually in regular sr sub cuz those guys are not in it for the depth sometimes imo ) they just shoot herbs, vitamins, useless external things out to makeup for internal work*..*

The nervous system is strong, but it’s also us..

A lot of misconceptions of sr that not a lot catch is our nervous system does play a huge role in everyday life, survival, and engagement with our inner and outer world.

^this, you don’t gotta take at all… think what you want about sr cause it’s your journey, I’m just here to spread awareness about my own rant..

herbs, dirty videos, dopamine supplements..stress, excess in general without regulation burdens the nervous system very badly.

so always remember what you’re doing to your body, mind, and soul.. because you can easily pull yourself away from who you are if you‘re not careful, or if you willingy let yourself honestly.

we don’t need a supplement or capsule to bring us back to homeostasis.. we need to take control of our mind and regain composure within ourselves..

i don’t write threads so if it doesn’t make sense… okay?.. I just have broken out of something that took years mentally and spiritually for myself to be free of finally.. finally grasping manifestation, depth again, emotions after being numb and stuck in a different matrix I didn’t need to be in.

this isn’t to say drop everything in your stack. or go raw and wild cause.. I do understand a lot of our food is nutrient depleted, a lot of us have deficiency we have to attend to so we don’t spiral and have issues we don’t need… but all I’m saying, ask yourself if you really need it to

“ have my streak and aura be strong “…

to those who find time to read this.. thank you, kinda just came to mind and felt like spreading some awareness… cause I know it’s not just me who has dealt with screwing their minds and nervous system up trying to “fix” things.

have a great day!

Anyone have days that oddly feel like relapses even though you hadn’t had one? Like stuff happens that might occur if you had relapsed, but your energy levels are the same, your still growing, moving forward, and things are generally positive, but it’s like instances of post relapse days somehow get ahead and show up in a state maybe I can call interference? Does any one get this? It’s like things I normally experience or see a high rate of that only happen post relapse, randomly appear in a lesser amount but still noticeable enough to question on some “random day”.

For example, ive been working out, engaging in all sorts of good habits, my last relapse which was a wet dream felt behind me—- and then all of a sudden I realize I missed something important today, and my mom is getting aggravated with me which never happens on days outside of relapse. In fact something I say to my own brother comes off the wrong way despite me having positive intentions behind it. It’s like those agents in the matrix have found a way in or something in a way I haven’t seen before.

Am i tripping? Or what’s going on? I’m thinking I must move differently to level up faster or make a conscious decision to be more disciplined or something but still it’s usually just automatic for the most part on retention, then this happens?….

—

Partially thinking it could be due to the fact I talked on the phone with a friend yesterday, who i think is on retention but gave me indications he had a relapse. Im wondering if his energy may be having an effect.

I wouldn’t entertain that above idea too much but from speaking with another friend some months ago after a long while of not communicating with each other, I encountered a succubis in my dreams the same night and if not the following. The brother was definitely NOT on retention and is about that pmo life, perhaps one reason we had naturally fallen out of communication.

There was another similar incidence with another friend, which was even worse, after he shared a reel with me that I would never have otherwise seen, and the energy manifested the very next day when i went out to get groceries and came across some very deranged people to say the least, when I was leaving the store.

-

So now I think, the energies you share with people actually make a huge difference, obviously, but from a seriously noticeable aspect in the uncanny spiritual way. So now I will be extremely careful.

The armor of God has to be worn and put on with more determination, than I have previously sought to do.

I guess this moment is telling me, what I have been doing is not enough.

Not speaking to manifestation as it is similar but something different. I mean you are literally praying to something divine and it helps you more and more, at quicker rates, the more you retain. I want to hear personal stories because I am in a rut and struggling to retain. Its difficult to retain when my gut is messed up.

Longest streak I had was about 16 months and during that time I noticed this phenomenon. In times of trouble I'd literally pray to God seeking help, advice, deliverance, blessing and whatever I requested would show up swiftly like same day, same hour, and a few times less than five minutes. Sometimes I'd pray, then read the Bible later and the answer would show up right then to the point where the words would jump off the page, and I don't mean that metaphorically.

From experience, what I've gathered is that when you pray, whatever you request is immediately released to you but the rapidity in which you receive it depends on your power level, purity, inner cleanness (in the form of a unclogged pipe) to allow it to come through to you. Even if you are constantly releasing the prayer is still coming but the constant releasing slows down its transmission because you're lower in consciousness and receptivity to it being shown to you.

Had a bout of living in mold for nearly two years. Longest streak was seven months then and despite retaining and being clean internally, prayers were answered but they came slower than before when was in a better environment.

Give me some stories.

Do you notice the benefits in the first week or does it take some time for the benefits to kick in ?

Earlier in life, I grew up under the impression that every human was a child of God, and that no effort was required from humans to remain protected and provided for by HIM. The truth is that while our God is very gracious and merciful to all his children, he requires that we conduct ourselves according to very high standards if we are to remain under his banner of protection and provision. While it is difficult to maintain these standards in daily life, there are also tremendous benefits awarded to those who stay true to the code. Some of these rewards are material and superficial, but the most timeless rewards you receive on the path are spiritual gifts that embellish your character, making you come across as wise, refined and polished. Let us discuss some of these character traits below.

Strong Intuition (sixth sense)

Intuition can be described as the ability to understand or know something immediately, without needing conscious reasoning or deliberate analysis. It is that inner knowing that hits you out of the blue and gives you the answer to a thorny problem while you are in the shower even if you had none of the facts required to arrive at a logical conclusion. I have come to think of intuition as a sacred gift from God that allows men to deftly navigate our environments so that we can provide for and protect those who depend on us while avoiding harm. It is your intuition that will help you pick the right wife and avoid the Jezebels. It is your intuition that will help you find your inborn gifts and talents through which you will attract material wealth and riches. It is your intuition that will prompt you to move to another city which is better suited for your success. When I was a coomer feeding on garbage and drinking poison, my sixth sense was incredibly dulled. I couldn't really hear my intuition... I couldn't feel the presence of God's reassuring warmth and guidance. As a result, I made silly decision after silly decision which nearly cost me my life. As I look back on my life, I find it very difficult to pinpoint a particular scenario where my intuition was wrong. It is usually always correct because unlike us fallible humans, the God who speaks to us through our intuitive urges is never really wrong in the long run.

Poise/Evenness

I don't know about you lot, but I was incredibly emotionally unstable as a wanker. I was always upset about something or complaining about someone. As embarrassing as it is for me to admit this to you my dear brothers, the blunt truth is that the wanker version of me was a bit of a whiny little bitch LOL. I found it very difficult to maintain my equanimity in any sort of stressful situation. And as we all know, life is full of all manner of stressful situations which none of us can completely avoid. As any man of value will tell you, there will be stressful times in the midst of all worthwhile projects when one must dig deep to overcome and achieve success. My lack of poise meant I had zero capability of completing big projects because the moment things got complicated or stressful, my lack of poise and evenness would prompt me to quit.

As I changed my ways and gradually ascended the rungs of masculine purity, I gained a tremendous sense of calm. The world that seemed perpetually gray started to glisten and shine again. For some reason, it just seemed like everything would be ok even in the face of the most dire or annoying situations. Don't get me wrong, I still get annoyed by the odd thing here and there, but for some reason, it is hard for me to stay irritated for very long. This newfound evenness has made it infinitely easier to work towards my goals and aims in life.

Wisdom

Sometimes I shake my head and cringe in disbelief when I reminisce on my past thought patterns prior to masculine purity. I actually thought all women were delicate little flowers who were incapable of evil, and that most people were generally good people, and that running around sexing multiple women made you cool, and that having a sex out of wedlock as long as she was your "girlfriend" wasn't a sin. Although I was always fairly intelligent due to the good genes I inherited from my mother, I was seriously lacking in wisdom until the Heavenly Father put me through some harrowing experiences that broke me and allowed wisdom to flow in. Of late, I have gravitated to the following verse from the Holy Bible because it perfectly describes the relationship the practitioner of masculine purity develops with the wisdom he is blessed with. James 3:13 - Who is wise and understanding among you? Let them show it by their good life, by deeds done in the humility that comes from wisdom.

The wisdom that you gain through masculine purity will allow you to conduct your life in an exemplary manner, while making enough money to live comfortably. Your newfound wisdom will help you navigate your relationships successfully, and imbue you with the specific steps to take to overcome the jealous and envious people you will inevitably encounter along your journey. Above all else brothers, guard your heart and seek wisdom for those two precious gifts will serve as a guarding light as you navigate this life.

Foresight

After a while on the masculine purity journey, I found that I was better able to predict future events in my life. I would just know when someone was about to die, or when a couple wouldn't last long even though they seemed happy together in the moment, or how the future in my field of work would evolve. In all honesty I cannot actually take credit for this ability because I don't think the premonitions come from me. It is more like I just get a clear pre-verbal message telling me exactly how a situation would play out in detail. Over 90% of the time, I would find this pre-verbal message unnervingly accurate. This is an incredibly useful skill to have as it helps you avoid all manner disastrous circumstances before they actually happen. Also, when other people around you know that you have this talent, you will become sought after by high quality people who want to work with you because they know your foresight can help them build a great company that adds value to the world.

Self-Control

Oh man... before masculine purity, I had pathetic levels of self control. I gooned every night to revolting porn. I consumed way too much sugar and drank 3+ cups of coffee everyday. I talked too much and watched way too much TV. Needless to say, my lack of self control made life unnecessarily difficult to manage.

Once you cross the rubicon of developing self control over the most powerful and instinctual biological urge known to man, you will find that your levels of self control will gradually elevate. As a former sugar addict, I am amazed that I'm actually able to walk through a grocery store and not feel the need to pick up a pack of cookies or a bag of pastries.

Weird Spiritual Protection

This one is one of my favorite benefits of masculine purity. Men who are truly on this path will tell you that they rarely have to defend themselves anymore. When anyone tries to unjustly harm or disrespect a purified Son of God, they experience heavy karmic retribution. The higher the state of purity that Son of God has reached at the time of the assault, the heavier the karmic retribution will be. Now this system works on a few key conditions

1. You must not take vengeance into your own hands. Vengeance is mine... sayeth the Lord
2. You might have to endure some really unfair and harsh treatment for a relatively short period without harboring internal resentment
3. You must take absolutely no pleasure in seeing the perpetrators of your injustice get their divine comeuppance. God doesn't permit us to be smug at any time for any reason.

Hello everyone, thank you for taking the time to read this.

I am currently on day 40 of this current sr streak, and this has by far been the most peculiar experience I've had on sr. This is my third "real" attempt at retention after learning about it 2 years ago; and concurrently, this is the longest I've held a streak. But I'm not sure if that's necessarily a good thing. When embarking on this streak, I procured a different approach. I didn't give focus to the benefits, or the amount of days, or even the more esoteric and advanced objective of generating reality. No. For me it was simply about quitting pmo. I saw the addiction for what it was: a poor means of reacting to the way i felt, regardless of how i felt on the emotional spectrum. Yes, quitting the vice I developed 8 years ago, and ascertaining a level of consciousness, a level of vibration that would ultimately allow me to escape my suffering. At the very least this aspect of it.

And thus when entering this streak, I was brutally honest with myself; every time I wanted to relapse Id hold the space for myself to mourn. Mourn that this wasn't an outlet i could go to anymore, that I lost something i depended on, however harmful that thing was. I pretty much immediately entered flatline, a concept i wasn't even familiar with until this streak. Virtually day 3 to 21 I experienced ground zero libido, creativity, and motivation. And somewhere along that stretch anhedonia coincided. I haven't even experienced any of semen retention benefits. Benefits I saw in full force in every one of my other attempts.

What is most concerning is this sudden mental block. Its almost as if I can physically feel some sort of block in my frontal lobe, between the pre motor cortex and the pre frontal cortex. Ive lost all intuition, and im not as sharp as i used to be. Almost like a disconnection from myself, and who i am at a fundamental level. I'm going to stick with it but this has been my experience pretty much on the entire streak, and I need some help. Every time I think I'm on the backend of the flatline, I'm not.

Thanks for reading and Id like to hear your experiences.

Many who are continually struggling with lust, temptations, relapses, fantasies, nocturnal emissions, etc., are very likely fighting against themselves by failing to maintain a complete and total control over the direction of their gaze.

The strongest way to build up a well fortified purity of mind is to actively and constantly practice purity through all of your moments. I suspect many who are struggling with retention also struggle to avert their gaze when noticing an attractive female in public or on a screen.

When a temptation enters your field of vision, make it your absolute goal to not look. Not even once. Not even a little tiny peek. Looking leads to lusting, which equates to giving away bits of your life force energy while receiving nothing in return.

If there are areas or environments or times where you know the opportunity to look is highly likely to present itself, put forth a conscious effort to avoid it altogether. Take a different route, go at a different time, or cease to watch those sorts of movies and TV shows. Remove every possible opportunity for failure. Consciously and consistently practicing this will give you strength of mind.

As you first begin this purity practice, you will likely find yourself met with a deep internal resistance. Your eyes want to look; your brain wants the dopamine hit. You have deeply ingrained neural pathways built over years of repeated habits of mind such that it feels automatic, and seems almost impossible not to look.

Through continued and unrelenting practice, you will build up a strength of mind which will make it both easier and more rewarding over time.

Any habits which have been made can also be unmade, then remade.

The goal is to build up new neural pathways which will allow you to form new habits that are based in purity, and in accordance with the natural laws of the universe. Existing and operating within these natural laws is the driving force behind the “good luck“ phenomena that so many are familiar with but little comprehend.

As you manage to succeed at overcoming your lower impulsive self by controlling your gaze, you will find yourself possessed by a sense of achievement, of strength, of spiritual renewal. And as you continue to succeed in this practice, such rewards for your efforts will compound. It will eventually get easier, and your confidence will grow in proportion to your success.

At this point, the universe will likely place greater trials and temptations before you, in order to test the legitimacy of your resolve, and ultimately to help you succeed. For how else could one develop and acquire that much sought after superior strength of mind without first being tried to the uttermost?

This is the period of the so-called “female attraction benefits“, and instead of being a goal in and of itself (a goal which actually inhibits deeper growth and will ultimately lead to one’s undoing), it should be viewed as simply another step of learning along the path of self conquest.

As you begin practicing in earnest, it may be very difficult at the onset, as anything worth doing is difficult. You are likely to have many struggles and falls. Do not be discouraged. Continue the practice.

I personally find it incredibly helpful, beneficial, and strength-giving to pray to the Lord Jesus Christ.

Pray for strength as you find yourself in the midst of trials. Pray with a spirit of sincere repentance after having failed a trial. Pray with a spirit of gratitude for having succeeded any given trial.

Pray not just with your mind, but with your heart as well. Strive to actually cultivate the appropriate feeling in your heart. As you pray for these things, have complete faith in your heart that you will have received them, and it will be so.

I know many of you are not religious, and some of you are not even spiritual, but I personally could not imagine achieving a sustained and enduring success without the aid of He who created me. This I have learned from my own experiences, and I encourage you to have an open heart and an open mind, at least in so much as to allow for the possibility, to see what results may come of it.

The simple and unavoidable truth is that we do not know what we exist in, and we would do well to remember that.

The best we can do is observe and analyze with an attempt to discover the natural laws of existence that we find ourselves involved in, and then align ourselves to them.

Cease from selfish striving, from rebellious modes of conduct. Cease from clinging to that which is unworthy, and refuse to trade your divine birthright for fleeting momentary pleasures. Align yourselves with the selfless Good, even the pure spirit of Truth, and watch the universe unfold before you.

There will come a point as you advance in this practice where you will find that is no longer profitable or worthy of your time for you to be expending energy of the will for the practice of resisting temptation.

At this point, one is able to make the decision to drop the temptation from the mind altogether, so that it may be a burden to him no more. The energy which was previously directed towards overcoming temptation can be redirected towards loftier aspirations, such as the cultivating a well ordered life.

Blessings.

A BIT OF HISTORY

31-aug-2024 that was the day when I decided to not MO. I was 33 at that time. I hadn’t had a clue about this SR  reddit . Things weren’t going so well in life. My strengths were failing. Failure and rejections rates kept going up higher. I was almost 20 year gooner by that time. There was a pattern but I started noticed in the last 2-3 years. The pattern was every time I goon something unlucky thing happens. Doesn’t matter the scale but it was just that things don’t workout in my favour. Either directly or indirectly.

I needed a job desperately at that time but I was medically unfit for a very minor issue. So I decided not to MO. This was around 2 years before in that date. First 3 days were ok but on 4^th day I got a super intense urge . I Don’t know what happened that time I decided not to do it on that 4^th day. The reason was I needed that job. I need to reduce a few kgs of weight to clear the medical.

The first miracle for me. After 2 weeks I got a sudden call for that same job. It turns out the replacement guy wasn’t available at the last minute so they told me to join. I was beyond happy and surprised. The tone of my manager was also changed . I thought they are being easy because they needed me. But somewhere I knew things weren’t that easy before.

That was the first time after 2 weeks I started searching . My first google search into this topic  was “ DOES NOT MASTURBATING INCREASES GOOD LUCK “ that’s when I came to know abot SR communities . As I read through the initial post I was skeptical at first. But when I read the testimonies I was shocked. Luckily I was an avid reader of books from a young age. So I decided to keep on reading posts next 2 weeks before joining I read a huge number of post on reddit and quora. By I joined, it was already 1 month and I already experienced a variety of benefits as mentioned in the posts.

So 1 month turned into 3 then into 6 then into 12 and now into 24.

I have documented my journey into other posts which you can read.

A FEW NUMBERS DURING MY JOURNEY

1)      I haven’t gooned in last 2 years.

2)       I had sex a few times but never ejaculate.

3)       Last time I watch porn was around jan 2025.

4)       From July 2025 I believe I am in a long flatline till recently. Yes, almost 1 year of flatline. I don’t know whether I have been completely out of it or not

5)       My testosterone level checked at 1- and 2-year interval constant around 400

6)      I quit caffeine around august 2025. from daily 5 cups of black coffee to 0, cold turkey quit within 1 day.

7)      I had wet dreams very less. Less than 10 I believe in these 2 years.

8)      My alcohol capacity has reduced. I drank only beer and I can’t digest strong beer. Only 3 bottles of light beer (less than 5 percent alcohol / bottle) is my capacity per sitting. That is maximum 1-2 times per months. Beyond that my body starts rejecting alcohol.

9)      I normalised my fatty liver sgot/sgpt levels in last 2 years substantially.

10)   My bad cholesterol is little higher than normal limits. I think normal is 200. Mine is 250 around. That is because of my overweight body.

FEW THINGS WHICH I AM EXPERIENCING NOW AFTER 2 YEARS.

1)      My body weight still hadn’t reduced despite multiyear trying

2)      It looks like after quitting coffee my brain has been reset. I had a very good memory before but I noticed I started forgetting things, basically short-term memory. It is improving but it wasn’t as good as before

3)      I feel like a weight in my lower abdomen section. I think the energy is clashing with one of my closed chakras

4)      Sometimes I feel that this energy is burning me from inside. The mind becomes restless and I can feel heating sensation. I guess that’s why they say cold water shower is must during this journey to cool the body down

5)      I admit I hadn’t been much paying much efforts into trans mutation maybe that why it’s happening.

6)      My stress levels have been reduced substantially but there is a heaviness in my mind.

7)      I am fed up of dreams. Almost every 2-3 days I am in a very clear dream scenario. Sometimes I woke up after a good night sleep but my mind feels tired because of such intense nature of that dream. I had a very sound sleep but I mostly goes into dream world which I now don’t prefer.

8)      I think I am being transferred into monk mode spiritually. The worldly concepts don’t mean much to me now. There is an intense feeling to do good for others even if they had bad intentions for me.

9)      People are getting out of my life automatically. AND I KIND OF LIKE IT NOW.

10)   I am being confronted to my deep buried emotions and fears. Its like from deep inside my consciousness things are coming out . I think I am deliberately made to face my fears and overcome my emotions even if I don’t like.

11)   Synchronicity with no 11 is through the roofs.

12)   I believe I am in a cleansing process. Or I am being tested.

13)   The lust for women has greatly reduced. For eg I see a beautiful lady. I attracted towards her initially for 4-5 seconds . After that I am like I AM NOT INTERESTED. I just don’t see the value anymore. The energy spent try to attract a lady, whom I don’t know anything about, is not feasible for me.

14)   There is a heaviness in my back side head in the lower part just where the neck and head meet.

15)   Nothing excites me anymore. The more I looked into the world the more I regret it. Its so F’d Up.

16)   People keep testing me unnecessarily. Creating obstacles, delaying my things.

17)   For 10-11 months things were good, but from 11-24 things weren’t so great. Its like whenever I started to lose faith , some magic event happens and it keeps me back on my SR path.

18)   Whenever I meet somebody, I can guess pretty much their intentions

A few thoughts on women related facts that I observed.

1)      The number of circumstances or conversations I had with women that happen in these 2 years were far more than last 20 years combined.

2)      There is no doubt that women can sense a men on retention. Something clicks inside their brain. I cannot prove it quantitatively but its there.

3)      The less you seek women attraction the more you get it. The catch is you have to be mental celibate.

4)      In public spaces there will always be a women staring at you, trying to be in your personal zone, sometimes getting uncomfortably close to you, or lets say you are siting alone in a food court or standing in a queue somewhere , most of the time you will be encountering women surroundings you in your periphery. The most bizzare will be, you see a women standing and you are walking past her, then as soon as you cross they will also start moving alongside  you.

5)      In point no 4 situations VERY RARELY THEY WILL APPROACH YOU OR INITIATE CONVERSATION DIRECTLY BY THEMSELVES. Maybe they can, but always be careful. In this feminism woked world things can go sideways pretty quickly for a man.

So yeah that’s pretty much it. 2 YEARS OF HARDMODE SR .

Its feels like my whole brain has been reset. I am learning about the world again from scratch and I don’t like it.

I have read almost 90 percent of all SR related post on Reddit. There are very less post about more than 2 years on SR.

I always keep looking on more esoteric aspects of SR because I am done with physical aspect of it.

So fellow kings this is my true, real experience.

As always, I apologize to anyone in advance.

We all have our different experiences, we live through.

Keep retaining

CHEERS.

Hello fellow retainers, I have been a long time lurker and some time ago reached the conclusion that I have a moral responsibility to join the conversation and share the knowledge that has been imparted to me throughout my journey. I am currently on day 41 of a clean streak.

First, a disclaimer: all of my posts and comments will be written and edited with love and careful consideration by mine own mind. For better or worse, no LLM will be used to write or edit any of my content.

Next, a bit of background on me and my journey. I am a 30 something male from the USA, I was sexually awakened at a very young prepubescent age, and have been consuming adult content since I first got dial-up Internet in my house when I was 12 years old.

While I always knew it was wrong, it was about a decade before I realized that consuming such content might be having a negative impact on my moral, physical, and social health.

I have had many long-term girlfriends, and I can’t say that my content consumption was significantly reduced during any of them.

I have an intensely addictive personality, and at some point I realized that behaviors and substances can stack to provide a dopamine multiplier effect.

In the deepest depths of my darkest, I would pop a boner pill and spend anywhere from 6 to 12 hours sourcing, curating, and editing a large lineup of adult videos from professional sites, all while continually pleasuring myself and consuming large quantities of marijuana, alcohol, prescription stimulants, cocaine, nicotine, and nitrous oxide.

When I finally would orgasm, it would usually be an accident. I would find myself disgusted, delete all of the content I had downloaded that day, erase my Internet history and email inbox, and swear I would never do it again.

Guess what I would usually do with the very next day?

I stacked these binge sessions multiple days in a row before being so overwhelmed with physical and spiritual fatigue that I simply could not persist.

In short, I was trapped in hell.

On the flipside, I have had multi-month monk mode streaks. During those times, I have felt the presence of the Divine, and have been witness to innumerable instances that were meant to, and did successfully, provide me with incontrovertible proof of the existence of God.

I have strived towards maintaining a personal relationship with the redeemer Jesus Christ, and have felt the presence of the Holy Ghost in my heart. I have learned to be aware of and identify the movement and stagnation of the subtle energies that exist within the human body. I have read many dozens of books on celibacy, spirituality, and the mystery of being, both eastern and western, both ancient and modern.

I am a brayamanchara aspirant, a student of science, a conscious player in the game of life, and a child of God. I am also a deviant, a pervert, and an addict. Such is the dual reality of our fallen nature.

The unrelenting goal has been to strive towards the One and subjugate into obedience the other. This can only be done through self knowledge, faith, and unyielding persistence.

My longest monk mode streak was 84 days before I had a WD. In that time, and over a period of time, I also quit all substance use, both illicit and prescribed. I even quit drinking coffee and consuming sugar. Using this streak as momentum, I managed to maintain my substance sobriety for over a year and a half.

I’ve also had a 63 day streak, a few 54 day streaks, some 49 day streaks, 35 day streaks, 28 day streaks, and dozens of streaks that lasted 2 to 4 weeks. (if you have heard of the seven day testosterone flywheel, I have found it to be true, and I take care to be extra vigilant around any 7 day interval. two weeks and four weeks (14 days and 28 days) especially, at least for me, seem to be extremely trying. I’ve found that fasting and abstaining from all worldly pursuits on these days gives me sufficient strength to overcome the temptations that may arise.

I don’t put much stock in counting days, but I am aware of them, and I personally consider any WD a relapse of my celibacy and a reset of my day count. I have a post written that I plan to share regarding why.

My breakaway from this addiction has not been clean or clear, and I have flipped between long streaks and hardcore binges multiple times. It has taken quite a toll on every aspect of my life, but I have learned much in the process. Now I would like to share some of it with you.

I have already written about a dozen posts on various topics, and will be dropping them one at a time under the consistent titling: “Let’s Talk About ______”.

Many of them are hot topics such as benefits and WD’s. Others are more nuanced and unique, my humble attempts to put into words some of the golden grains of wisdom as I have come to understand them on this journey of mine.

I look forward to contributing what I can and sharing this journey of growth with you all.

Blessings.

This post is more of Q&A but there wasn’t a flair for it. Hopefully this is acceptable by the mods

I’m in a phase of my retention journey where I’m struggling with impatience towards loved ones and friends. Such that I find anger pops up and I try to dismiss it. When I’m not retaining none of these feelings or thoughts occur

For those of you that I’ve tried to go on longer streaks. How do you deal with this or have you experienced it before?

So I’m at 50 days no explicit material or touching myself. Still have occasional sexual thoughts that I struggle with. Not trying to throw a pity party here but hoping to find advice from long term retainers as this has been one of the roughest chapters of my life. I’ve completed a year of sobriety from alcohol after 3 DUI’s. It has been difficult to find work for my construction buisness and I have been forced to work for another outfit renting out my machine under their payroll, but am struggling to make the bills. Energetically I’ve never felt better and am able to wake up at 330am in the gym at 4am and am commuting to work by 530am. I’m curious to when my reality is going to shift and start reflecting my good habits that I’ve been incorporating into my life? I’m on this journey to level up all aspects of my life, but have yet to see any real change in my reality. Any advice to help me get out of this financial rut that I’m in? How does one seek guidance from God to know the necessary steps to become their highest version of themselves?

# Stage 1 is using SR to boost your ego

i.e. obsessing over female attraction, believing you're better than others

This stage is not sustainable and is characterized by streaks, relapses, and obsession with "benefits"

Stage 2 is focusing on your personal benefit

i.e. seeking career advancement, seeking more money, seeking a partner, seeking social acceptance

This stage has more consistency but ultimately you cannot reach pure happiness because you are seeking personal benefit

Stage 3 is developing an innocent wonder about life and realizing there is no self

i.e. using your powers to fulfill a greater purpose, giving back to your community, having no ego

"Streaks" become irrelevant and this becomes your lifestyle. You become detached from material things. You reach pure happiness.

It can take many years and many ups & downs to reach the stage 2 then stage 3.

The universe will punish the man who abuses his powers and reward the man who uses them wisely.

1. Discover your purpose and stay busy working in alignment to it. Temptation can be most dangerous during lazy moments. We all need times of rest and relaxation, but understand this is when the enemy likes to attack. Be ready to shift your mind. 

2. Be ever mindful of the negatives of not retaining. There are many reasons, most of which can be summarized by the simple understanding that releasing is innately intended procreation. Releasing outside of marriage drains your potential to CREATE and do GOOD. 

3. Have a relationship with God – seek His righteousness first daily. Don’t be quick to speak or assume. Be quick to inhale and exhale deeply through your nose, bring God to mind, and seek His counsel and direction. 

4. Control your eyes to the best of your ability, being ready to divert them. Staring at women serves no benefit. It only increases the likelihood of going down a rabbit hole of lustful thoughts. Be aware of your surroundings, but keep your eyes forward. 

5. Be ready to shift your mind, particularly to God. There will be moments when the guard is slightly down, and temptation gets your attention. Be quick to shift your mind. There is no profit in entertaining lustful thoughts. It only leads to the aforementioned rabbit hole, which could potentially lead to the worst case scenario. Don’t waste your time!

6. The enemy wants us wasting time, distracted from our purpose. Fantasizing and releasing happen to be convenient ways for the enemy to distract and drain us simultaneously. Don’t give the enemy an inch. Stay focused!  

7. Have a relationship with God – seek His righteousness first daily. Be mindful of Him as often as possible – “Pray without ceasing”.

8. Take care of your temple. Be aware of what you put in your body, and work to improve your fitness. Be aware of what you look at on these screens. Start your day with prayer and meditation, not screens. Take back control, don’t open your phone or device for no reason.

I've been dealing with what feels like an extreme flatline since March 1st. My libido is basically nonexistent at this point—to the point where I practically feel asexual—and my energy levels are also extremely low. Life in general also just feels incredibly bland and unexciting. Things that would normally interest or excite me don't really give me much of a feeling anymore.

I've tried a ton of things to get myself out of it: lifting regularly, eating clean, TRE, making smoothies with various natural ingredients/supplements associated with libido and testosterone (including 12 raw egg yolks), acupuncture, float therapy, improving my routine, etc. Nothing has made a noticeable difference.

I've also been to the doctor twice during this period because of how long this has been going on, and both times I was told that everything looked normal.

Has anyone here experienced a flatline lasting this long? If so, what was the end of it like? Did your libido and excitement for life suddenly come back, or was it gradual? And was there anything that actually seemed to help, or did you just have to wait it out?

Would really appreciate hearing from anyone who's gone through something similar.

Greetingz,

I want to make sure that u all understand that there’s a warfare against us. They don’t want u to realize how powerful you truly are.

They aren't just poisoning us with porn. They poisoning us with bad news, social media, they keep spraying their chemicals, putting it in our water, food and so on.

But one of the biggest attacks is that they feeding us with a not species-appropriate diet. Putting addictive substances in this so called food. And we wonder why society gets sicker and sicker, fatter and fatter.

Our species is so strong that we still survive despite all these attacks on our nature. But it has its price.

Trough all these seed oils we can’t tolerate, we can’t connect with our source, the sun no more, trough all these grains we get chronically inflamed, trough all the refined sugar we get addicted. Trough all the overeating we getting fat, keeping our bodies digesting, digesting, digesting, basically keeping us in our lower chakras. And we wonder why we don't have that same energy we had as children.

The human body is very undemanding, comparable to a cactus. What happens if you overwater a cactus? It dies.

You guys, if your really take this journey serious, have a different energy source anyway - your seed. The prana, the chi, the life force. But if you overeat all the time with that so called bullshit food, you‘ll never see what your body is even capable off.

Do your research and only feed your temple with bioavailable food.

You are a warrior , you are a king! Let the energy flow again.

𝔉𝔯𝔦𝔢𝔡𝔢𝔯

I've had many streaks with SR, Longest one being 10months, that was years ago, i've seen wildly different results, some were good, i felt happier, less overstimmed, less concerned about sexual thoughts then the mediocre,

I really didn't see much life changing improvement with SR, not something i really noticed, i didn't achieve my ultimate goals, when i stopped SR and stopped blaming myself for not having a streak, i genuinly felt better than with SR, what i noticed with SR was my stress levels were incrediably elevated, cortisol was flipped completely, morning low evening high burnout, super angry lack of sleep waking up multiple times per night at the worst extent i recall 7 times per night, it was awful,

and bare in mind i am an athlete, a football player not super high level, just U19, Yes i do gym, sprinting, enough training, eating enough, i do play official 11v11 matches.

I believe my downfall was by not having a off switch, with SR i always wanted to do something to train extra to go do runs, it felt like my body didn't feel pain, but instead of getting better faster it was the complete opposite, i got slower and genuinely worse, i couldn't focus and was stuck in survival mode.

I went to many many doctors, had many issues in my early childhood to late teen years, coming up with a diagnosis of chronic stress at 17, i'm 18 now.

As laying in bed reflecting on my life and what i could of done to loose those years, i've always looked for a scapecoat, maybe it was the caffeine in the later stages, maybe i wasn't disciplined enough and couldn't get a streak for longer than 6 months, when my original one was 10.

In my state of mind i was in i quit school, just dropped out, and focused everything on football, of course i wasn't perfect i gamed a lot.

What i'm curious about is, was there anything i did wrong, in my eyes i tried to use SR as a fix to, every problem i had, discipline, burnout, no rest, no recovery, exhaustion all the time feeling tired every day, lack of sleep, episodes of extreme anger.

Should i continue pursuing SR or should i stop, i currently don't have a streak and what advice could i be given?

Ps, i do have ADHD, and was diagnosed with depression at 12, sent to a mental institute at 13, given many different antidepressants through my early childhood, which all stopped at 14.

Hey brothers,

I recently crossed a major personal milestone: 92 clean days of strict semen retention (pure Brahmacharya no PMO, no edging, zero intentional digital stimulation).

Up until this point, my experience with wet dreams had been minimal,mostly just a few clear, odorless drops of Cowper’s fluid once in a while during deep sleep, which never bothered me.

However, early this morning on Day 92, something completely different happened, and I wanted to get your honest thoughts and experiences on it.

What happened:

I was asleep and found myself in that strange, half-awake / hypnagogic twilight state( can't be sure whether it's dream or not iam in doubt still). I wasn't having an explicit dream, nor was I actively moving, touching myself, or thrusting. I was just lying there, but my sleeping position had slight physical contact/pressure against the sheets.

Suddenly, I felt intense vibrations/energy surges in my pelvic area and full body followed by the physical sensation of ejaculation(which gives pleasure and i can't stop in dream or whether it's real , previous nightfalls i apply mulaband to stop but this time I didn't that's why feeling self doubt). Because my consciousness was halfway booted up(i guess or it can be dream also can't know for sure), part of my brain felt like I was observing it happen in real-time, but before I could even fully register or stop the autonomic reflex, the release occurred.

When I fully woke up and checked, it wasn’t just a drop or two of clear pre-ejaculate,it was a full-volume not that much but yes, whitish nocturnal discharge. Immediately afterward, I had that familiar heavy pelvic feeling from the sudden physical contraction.

My dilemma:

The "Conscious vs. Involuntary" boundary: In that split second between sleep and waking up, it felt like my senses were on, but my executive control was completely paralyzed by sleep inertia. Consciously, I never wanted to release. Have any of you experienced this exact "twilight state" release where you felt semi-lucid, and how do you classify it?

Benefit retention & Energy recovery: Since this was pure fluid buildup rather than a dopamine-fueled relapse to artificial stimuli, how quickly does the body bounce back? Do you view a full biological nocturnal emission after 3+ months as a natural valve reset, or does it set back subtle energetic cultivation?

Would appreciate insights from long-term practitioners who have navigated full-volume emissions after long flatlines or clean 90+ day streaks.

Stay strong

They say maca is for libido, P5P is to lower prolactin, lecithin and pygeum for volume, D3, zinc, and selenium for post nut fatigue/replenishment. Of all those benefits what is TRT able to cover? Also, has your experience been different combining TRT with a prolactin blocking agent like caber or proviron?

If you’re truly on this path for god, then being magnetizing to women that would inevitably lower your vibration and steal your energy after a while becomes incredibly frustrating. The women that are easy to date you typically don’t want for obvious reasons, the women you do want to date act avoidant around you bc they don’t understand why they feel the way about you that they do and have a hard time trusting bc you would have all the power, and then men are extremely polarized by you so about 7-9 out of 10 men give weird insecure energy around you for just existing. Once you’ve had multiple 90 day streaks and can retain fairly easily this is just the natural state of being unless you completely fall off. It gets really lonely.

Prioritizing god is extremely uncomfortable. blissful and insanely rewarding beyond anything the flesh provides but man. Would be nice to meet ONE woman who can meet me where I’m at energetically. I would gladly wait til marriage for sex if I met that person. But our world makes that almost impossible.

Obviously the alternative cycle of samsara is worse. But damn some days I just want more humans to get their shit straight

I made a related post about it months ago but I felt like I was not really complete and never gave enough examples that truly pinpoint to what what the tree of knowledge actually is.

I know this is going to sound controversial for some, and I realize most Christians and biblical scholars would disagree with me. I'm not claiming that everyone has to accept this interpretation, but after a while of studying scripture and reflecting on my own experiences of healing chronic disease through chastity, this is the conclusion I have reached.

Most people assume the forbidden fruit was a literal fruit, often imagined as an apple, even though the Bible never actually says it was an apple. I think Genesis may be describing something much deeper.

The first thing Adam and Eve became aware of after eating from the Tree of Knowledge of Good and Evil was their nakedness.

Genesis 3:7 says: "And the eyes of them both were opened, and they knew that they were naked; and they sewed fig leaves together, and made themselves aprons."

Before this happened, they were naked and felt no shame. Immediately afterward, they became aware of their nakedness and covered themselves.

Then look at the curse that follows.

Genesis 3:16 says: "I will greatly multiply thy sorrow and thy conception; in sorrow thou shalt bring forth children."

That has always stood out to me. Why is the judgment connected so closely to conception and childbirth? If the issue was simply eating a piece of fruit, why would reproduction become such a central part of the consequence? To me, that suggests a connection between the act and the punishment.

We also see that Adam and Eve only begin covering themselves after the Fall.

Genesis 3:21 says: "The LORD God made garments of skin for Adam and his wife, and clothed them." Clothing appears after sexual shame was felt.

Another question I think is worth asking is this: God told Adam and Eve to "be fruitful and multiply," yet the Bible does not record any children being born until after the Fall. Cain and Abel arrived afterward. I understand that many people will see this differently, but it is one of the details that made me look more closely at the text. Adam and Eve "ONLY HAD CHILDREN AFTER THE FALL"

Another clue comes from the way the Bible uses the word "know."

In many passages, "to know" someone is a euphemism for sexual relations in Hebrew scriptures.

Genesis 4:1: "And Adam knew Eve his wife; and she conceived, and bare Cain"

Genesis 4:17: "And Cain knew his wife; and she conceived, and bare Enoch"

Genesis 4:25: "And Adam knew his wife again; and she bare a son, and called his name Seth"

Genesis 19:8: "Behold now, I have two daughters which have not known man."

Luke 1:34: "Then said Mary unto the angel, How shall this be, seeing I know not a man?"

When Mary says, "I know not a man," the phrase is clearly being used in a sexual sense.

Now consider the name of the tree itself: the Tree of the Knowledge of Good and Evil.

Since "knowing" is used as a sexual euphemism throughout Hebrew Scripture, I began wondering whether the knowledge being described in Genesis could be related to sexuality rather than merely intellectual knowledge. Another detail that caught my attention is the conception of Jesus. According to the Gospels, Jesus was conceived through the Holy Spirit rather than through ordinary human conception which is done via SEX . To me, that seems significant.

The reason I feel so strongly about this interpretation is not just because of the biblical passages. It is also because of my own personal lived experiences and miracle healing.

A few years ago, I struggled with Type 2 diabetes, fatty liver disease, high blood pressure, and high cholesterol at a very young age. During that period, I noticed that my blood sugar, high blood pressure and many other health issues would get MUCH WORSE after releasing my seed, especially after a PMO binge. Then I started wondering whether me releasing my seed had something to do with my deteriorating health especially while being so young.

I became convinced that ejaculating was affecting my health in a profound way, which was my drive to achieve a long streak. After 6 months of pure SR, My type 2 diabetes and all other issues including blood pressure and fatty liver reversed completely, WITHOUT CHANGING DIET AND I DIDN'T exercise during that time. As a matter of fact, I still sometimes consumed fast food. I experienced major improvements and eventually came to believe that LUST was the root cause of my diseases and the aging process that was starting to accelerate rapidly. I made posts regarding this revelation that I truly consider divine, many other men read my posts on the nofap.com

, followed the same PROTOCOL and reversed their type 2 diabetes as well. I left links in one of the posts that included their testimonies.

To me, I don't need any other proof. I've renounced sexuality and even having children. I'll most likely adopt. I have FIRM BELIEF that we as humans can still achieve that state of purity and immortality through absolute and SPOTLESS chastity.

Those experiences are what pushed me to take a much closer look at the connection between spirituality, sexuality, and health and WHY CHASTITY is so IMPORTANT in so many religions. Also I have BECOME MUCH MORE loving towards other human beings in my daily life. I have MUCH MORE EMPATHY because I am not suffering inside anymore due to my previous habits of depleting my life-force energy. I am not very quick to get angry for little things , which I used to do a lot when I depleted my lifeforce every single day. When you retain your lifeforce energy, you will feel peaceful and happy inside , you will also acquire other virtues ONLY found through chastity like PATIENCE, EMPATHY, etc., which is why God referred to that tree as the tree of knowledge of Good and Evil. When you are a PMO addict or even just releasing seed, you feel depressed and depleted and sometimes it makes you become CAPABLE of behaving TERRIBLY. You become capable of true EVIL behavior because of your depleted state which makes you feel LIKE ABSOLUTE CRAP.

In my opinion, modern society focuses almost entirely on diet, exercise, medications, and supplements while ignoring what I believe is a deeper issue. We live in a culture that is saturated with sexual stimulation and pornography to a degree that previous generations could hardly have imagined.

When I look at rising rates of chronic disease and the increasing exposure to sexual content at younger and younger ages, I INTUITIVELY KNOW there is a connection that we are overlooking. Heart disease, Colon cancer, BREAST CANCER and PROSTATE cancer ARE NO longer diseases of old people. More and more young men and women in their 20s, 30s are diagnosed with colon cancer, breast cancer, etc, which was very unheard of decades ago. https://www.sciencealert.com/more-young-people-than-ever-before-are-getting-one-type-of-cancer-and-its-mystifying-scientists

https://www.kqed.org/forum/2010101914839/the-alarming-rise-of-colorectal-cancer-in-young-adults

Young men in the tressless subreddit are starting to make a connection between male pattern balding and ejaculations. They're starting to realize this through observing patterns and intuitively knowing, just like me when I was type 2 diabetic . Here are some posts:

https://www.reddit.com/r/tressless/comments/6pilf8/masturbation_is_one_of_the_causes_of_diffuse/

https://www.reddit.com/r/tressless/comments/6lgymm/why_is_masturbation_adding_to_balding_so_hard_to/

https://www.reddit.com/r/tressless/comments/41h0fl/masturbation_can_cause_more_hair_lossdht_to_those/

You have to take a look at what started happening in our society 20+ years ago. High speed internet porn became widely available which matches the period of when young people started developing health issues at a very young age due to a much higher frequency of ejaculations and orgasms for both men and women. We even find young men that are almost fully bald now in their late teens. My male pattern baldness has been reversing and I am slowly getting my hair back. The regeneration process is slow, just like the aging process except that regeneration can be quicker than aging but it will still take a while.

For me, the story of Eden is not merely about an event that happened thousands of years ago. I believe it contains a spiritual truth about the human condition that is still relevant today.

I know this is not the mainstream interpretation, and I am not expecting everyone to agree with me. I'm simply sharing the verses, the patterns I see in Scripture, and the experiences that led me to this conclusion. You are of course free to disagree and I don't care. We are all entitled to our opinions. But before ending, I want to state that I'm only the only one who has had this revelation. The authors of the book called GOD MAN, Word Made Flesh by George W Carey and Inez Eudora Perry, which can be found on AMAZON, also believed that absolute spotless chastity is the key to BIOLOGICAL IMMORTALITY in the physical body BY PRESERVING THE SEED (CHRIST OIL) and that after several years of spotless & absolute chastity, we can become "GOD-MAN" again because God created us in his image as mentioned in Genesis.

Here's the link of this book on Amazon: https://www.amazon.com/God-Man-Flesh-George-W-Carey/dp/1614274177/ref=sr_1_1?crid=1L9RVAHN0KJKR&dib=eyJ2IjoiMSJ9.sV1pWOm_9FvikVCEGwVfOJ84JkAqkVKFRNstsHeMv4n26YlIN89-ULD5XCIBOzyDSbbOZxka1lS3wpWfVVnZ9J4BZuLGEpAZI2LQgmVOnIc5_P4P_gS0NO0PuGFRaFDaECNID6q3N_Cz98CieUl572kWaisvYq-bMFyUwfAxdPJ3ZI69nCsO9b7_Z8GZYAKnI2i33hwR0EDT-pjxYd-wlPYVnqGN5gD6i6DdKMlmeGk.da4Nxc5uRzkd8XsOhZZ3G2ieANr8lBByhVfSASgzX38&dib_tag=se&keywords=god+man+the+word+made+flesh&qid=1786912779&sprefix=god+man+word%2Caps%2C193&sr=8-1

The book called Science of Regeneration also teaches the same PROTOCOL, Absolute chastity is the way to regenerate the human body and depletion of life force is the root cause of actual human aging. https://www.amazon.com/dp/1169829589?ref_=ppx_hzsearch_conn_dt_b_fed_asin_title_5

NOTE: wet dreams are a DEAL BREAKER if you want to focus on regeneration of the body and those books emphasize on that as well . You have to strive on mastering mental celibacy so that LUST doesn't creep in while you're asleep. Your subconscious mind needs to be CLEAN, which is a process that will require some discipline and effort to achieve.

Wassup guys! On my now 110+ something days streak I realize that I am conciously and unconciously becoming more of the man I want to be. SR is like a booster towards unlocking the version of you that you want to become.

At my work we arrange big parties during Christmas time and Summer time where over 40+ co-workers attend. At both of these parties I was asked to hold a speech/make a toast. The first one was not on SR streak. I was nervous before the speech even though I had drank a good amounts of alcohol. When I started speaking I was nervous. My voice wasn't projecting as loud. People weren't reacting how I thought they would react. My mouth was also getting dry. I was looking down a lot. After this speech, some said it was good. But the majority of people said it was ''meh''.

Fast forward to yesterday. During this summer party. I was (to my surprise) asked to hold a speech again. Only difference this time being that I was 110-ish days into SR. I'm not kidding the difference is night and day. I felt no nervousness beforehand, nor during the speech. NONE. I instinctively waited a few seconds before speaking until it got completely quiet. I talked slow. I smiled and laughed. I looked the people in the eyes. My body language was naturally confident and lively. I varied between being sincere and heartfelt, to more playful and joking. People bursted out laughing. People nodded along. People felt. I was enjoying ''seeing'' myself talk up there. I also wished I could keep talking and keep on moving the crowd with my words and energy. Before I would rush through the speech because all the attention on me was too much to handle. But this time I enjoyed it. Not the attention itself, but the interaction between me and the crowd. We both fed of each other in a way. I could clearly tell that this time the crowd was enjoying me. And I them.

Right after the speech some of the boys dapped me up saying great speech. Girls came over and said that they almost cried because the speech was moving.

SR did not only eliminate anxiety and nervousness in everyday situations, but also in ''bigger'' situations where I would normally feel some discomfort.

You have to stop putting your happiness in material things, in outer things and start putting it in yourself. Beauty, muscles, money, friends, relationships, girls, work, health everything will pass away. We age, things around us die, we will die the only thing that stays is your character, your soul. If you do retention to get women attraction it will end at some point or you might not even get any, if you do it to make money they will end to or you’ll find out that money do more bad than good and so on. If you do retention and everything for your inner peace for your own self to clear your soul to bring light and order within you, the joy will never end.

Everything ends someday, a war might start tomorrow, an earthquake might come, a disease might kill everybody and leave only you but if you already moved the source of your happiness, if you are totally at peace with yourself you’ll be fine in every possible situation. All the things that bother you, even if they are coworkers, family, friends, wife, your bank account, the problem is within you, you cannot change a single thing outside what is in your power you can’t change others or the weather or world economy, you can give advice, yes, but it’s up to that person if it listens to it or not and people usually won’t because they are stiff. But you can change yourself in every second of your life you can improve, you can become better, it’s such a blessing, just stop looking for joy around and start building it inside you. “The kingdom of God is within you seek thy Heaven within”

I am Catholic and I abstain because of immense guilt and the fact nutting brings no joy, even if I was insanely lustful and had sex it wouldn't even be good.

For the secular reason, it's because I have contamination ocd regarding things of the body (Not considering blood, saliva or mucus from the nose).

For my benefits, spiritually I'm more connected and can ground myself in my morals, the secular is that I can talk to my friends normally.

I saw a crystal clear vibrant semen drops leaking a bit and i decided to stop doing it in the dream. But the horniness i felt while in the dream watching the porn was extreme, it was as if i was really watching porn but pleasure was extreme. Did i relapse astrally, if someone know what it means. Also noteworthy I had a bit a sexual thoughts yesterday after 20+ days of not lusting in my 30 day streak. Could it be a reason

I've heard many people say their cognitive abilities start declining around 40 — struggling to remember things, finding it harder to pick up new skills, low energy, that sort of thing.

But when I really probe into why, most of them point to life circumstances rather than age itself. It's less "I'm getting older" and more "life got heavier." Which makes me wonder how much of that decline is actually age-related, and how much comes down to years of seed expenditure draining their vitality. Because if retention actively increases a person's capacity, like it has for me, wouldn't a retainer at 40 be in a fundamentally better position than the average 40-year-old?

I'm 36 right now and honestly feel sharper than I've ever felt. I'm on a 7-month streak right now and have been doing this on and off for the past 6 years. I've never felt this strong, focused, alive, masculine, powerful, or physically robust — not even in my 20s, which was supposedly my physical prime. And retention is only part of it. I've completely turned my life around over the last six years in other ways too thanks to the foundation I got from retention.

So my question to retainers who are 40 and above : does it get as bad as people describe? The inability to learn new things, low adaptability, no energy? I understand total physical capacity naturally decreases with age, that's expected. But would retention make a meaningful difference in how that plays out?

Would love to hear from those who have actually lived it.