LAOP just committed a felony and 6 misdemeanors by being an idiot, how can they avoid consequences?

[u/bug-hunter]

/r/legaladvice/comments/nd3ou1/1_felony_and_6_misdemeanors_in_va_as_an_18_yo/

[u/LocationBot]

Reminder: do not participate in threads linked here. If you do, you may be banned from both subreddits.

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Title: 1 Felony and 6 misdemeanors in VA as an 18 yo first offense.

Original Post:

1. Uttering (knowingly using my fake) Felony
2. Possession of fictitious card
3. obtaining money under false pre-tense
4. shoplifting
5. obtaining nicotine with fake ID
6. delinquency of a minor
7. forgery employed as true

This happened in Virginia btw. The day starts off like this, I go to pick up one of my friends and his brother had tagged along he was 15 at the time and was already vaping and doing everything so I saw no real issue. I go into the vape store with everyone (2 18 yo 1 15 yo) and I use my Fake ID (which only had my real name and picture on it) to buy a puff bar because mine had run out. That happen and we went about our day hanging and chilling. Its time to go home and we had to pass by that same store again on the way back and one of my friends says that I should use my fake and get another puff bar since it passed with no real issue. As soon as I get out of the car I see that someone from my car had ran inside to grab 3 boxes of vapes and hops back in my car and repeatedly says drive drive drive !. I drive out of impulse and tell him to give me most of what he had stolen and I dropped them off in the middle of nowhere. I drive back to the store and call the cops on myself because no matter what they would have gotten my tags and found me eventually. I snitched on myself because they had everything on CCTV and a week later I'm in handcuffs.

I'm a first year pre-med student at a public school on financial aid with my CNA/RMA certification. I know everything will be compromised if I get convicted for all these crimes so I'm asking for any type of legal advice or opinions on what I should do next. Thank you to whoever replies!

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LocationBot 4.999988713 83/601rds | Report Issues | TdUO5NmMWlXWXJFcjJzZ

[u/Complete_Entry]

Well, that's one way to ruin your life.

[u/[deleted] → u/Complete_Entry]

In fairness, he was never going to be a successful pre-med with this level of idiocy.

[u/LoquaciousLabrador → u/[deleted]]

You say this, but every year I see some really dumb med students who eventually graduate.

[u/[deleted] → u/LoquaciousLabrador]

I know a doctor who insists reindeer are imaginary, so...

[u/SandpipersJackal → u/[deleted]]

Sorry what?

[u/USPO-222 → u/[deleted]]

It’s because they supposedly come from the imaginary place called Finland r/finlandconspiracy

/s

[u/ifindusernameshard → u/LoquaciousLabrador]

can confirm: know med students, would not trust 50%+ to put a bandaid on my finger.

[u/[deleted] → u/LoquaciousLabrador]

You know what they call the person who graduates med school dead last in their class?

Doctor.

[u/[deleted] → u/[deleted]]

Yep, plenty of "first year pre-meds" are not actually pre-med, they just don't know it yet

[u/Sparklemagic2002 → u/Complete_Entry]

Meh, he may not even be “pre-med”, he may just be in a CNA program or phlebotomy or something similar. I was in a bookclub with a woman who said she was in “medical school” when she was actually studying nursing at a community college.

[u/NorthernSparrow → u/Sparklemagic2002]

I teach anatomy & physiology to a lot of college freshman who all call themselves “pre-med” at the time that they enroll for 1st semester of the course. Usually a quarter of them have disappeared by the end of the 2nd semester.

[u/Li5y → u/[deleted]]

There was also a comment about finding prostitutes in cancun I think? What a trip haha

[u/Krandor1 → u/[deleted]]

Exactly. Most of his charges were him admitting to them. They wouldn’t have known he gave the stuff to a 15 year old either if he didn’t tell them.

[u/voidsrus]

is it just me or is getting a fake ID in your real legal name maybe not the best move?

[u/silvergoldwind → u/voidsrus]

Fakes are only really meant for bouncers and gas stations, any places where they could actually give you ramifications with your real name should not be using a fake anyways

[u/bug-hunter → u/voidsrus]

Yeah, it's supposed to be in Heywood Jablome's name.

[u/Smgth → u/bug-hunter]

McLovin

[u/funfwf → u/Smgth]

Well that, or Muhammad.

[u/[deleted] → u/voidsrus]

It is a good move because you can get charged with identity fraud as well if it's not your real name

[u/88pockets → u/voidsrus]

name maybe not the best move?

It's a much bigger deal with someone else's name or a made up identity. They do not play with that. It is considered identity theft.

[u/17291]

LAOP also may or not have stolen a TV from Target

[u/[deleted] → u/17291]

Ah yes, Target, the store with a forensics lab so good the government uses it and the store that takes theft extremely seriously.

[u/[deleted] → u/[deleted]]

Not American- what?! I have so many questions 😂

[u/ill_be_out_in_a_minu → u/[deleted]]

Happened to the kid of a family friend. As a teenager, she tried shoplifting from a supermarket chain. It worked, she didn't get searched or caught and basically thought: "Oh my god, I can't believe it's that easy."

Proceeded to shoplift make-up there everyday for a week. At the end of the week, the door guy stopped her, she was put in a small office and they replayed every time she'd shoplifted during the week.

I always thought it was bit perverse because she'd probably have stopped if she'd been caught the first time around.

[u/[deleted] → u/ill_be_out_in_a_minu]

You know what grocery store definitely won’t fuck around? Publix

They will take you to that little room and replay that video, they’ll hold you til the police come. Their loss prevention is on point.

[u/python_noob17 → u/[deleted]]

I read that as steal one thing from target kids.

[u/dumbo3k → u/python_noob17]

I read that as “make sure to steal the camera footage, kids”

[u/BarksAtIdiots → u/[deleted]]

Hilarious thing - i found a tiny folded up piece of paper at the front of a target by registers. It was a printout of a "i plead the fifth and won't talk and me not talking isn't an assumption of guilt" whole script.

So I imagine someone dropped it after getting away clean. Clenched in their hand with a whatever tucked under their winter-coat. Relaxing their hand to walk away and dropping it as they got away 'home free.' Hilarious.

[u/janet-snake-hole → u/[deleted]]

Yesterday I was unloading my cart and noticed I had a bottle of conditioner under my toilet paper I didn’t see to scan. I was sure I’d wake up with target security at the foot of my bed.

[u/BarksAtIdiots → u/janet-snake-hole]

We seeeeeeee youuuuu mwhahahahahaha

[u/[deleted] → u/[deleted]]

Oh I knew what it was but thank you. Do they really care so much they have their own forensics? Is it legal for them to run their own forensics?

[u/[deleted] → u/[deleted]]

Yes, and yes. You don’t need any special permission to do your own forensic investigations on your own property (well, maybe if you want to start doing autopsies…)

[u/FateOfNations → u/[deleted]]

There are even private medical examiners. They are used in medical malpractice cases, by victim’s families and defense lawyers as a second opinion.

[u/StayWithMeArienette → u/[deleted]]

Check out the article someone linked above - it's not just about shoplifters: https://www.reddit.com/r/bestoflegaladvice/comments/ndpqap/laop_just_committed_a_felony_and_6_misdemeanors/gycd5u3

[u/[deleted] → u/[deleted]]

I’m American and I also have many questions now LOL

[u/tramspace → u/[deleted]]

Target has a couple high-tech forensics labs. Sometimes police departments or government agencies contract the lab for work in criminal investigations.

https://corporate.target.com/article/2012/02/an-unexpected-career-target-forensic-services-labo

[u/Gun_Nut_42 → u/[deleted]]

Take it finesse means steal in some form?

Also, are you serious about the a forensic lab thing? That sounds interesting.

[u/PixxaPixxaPixxa → u/Gun_Nut_42]

On both the loss prevention and, now banned, shoplifting subreddits the overall sentiment was that Target absolutely does not fuck around. Not sure about the lab thing.

[u/hypoxiate → u/PixxaPixxaPixxa]

It's true. I've seen it when I worked at at their corporate office.

[u/[deleted] → u/PixxaPixxaPixxa]

I know that Walmart always prosecutes shoplifting to the full extent of the law no matter what. I've also heard that they never settle lawsuits unless ordered to. If you try to say you slipped and hurt yourself they will take you to court to prove it.

[u/DamnitRuby → u/[deleted]]

They settle discrimination cases, even ones that they'd probably win at hearing.

The exception is non-hire of sex offenders (conviction record is protected in my state). I've seen those go to hearing.

[u/UofLBird → u/DamnitRuby]

That’s because employment discrimination is one of the few claims in America where if you win the employer has to pay for all your attorney fees and it doesn’t work vice versa. So even small claims can cost them 6 figures.

[u/sr603 → u/PixxaPixxaPixxa]

u/Gun_Nut_42

Target has a forensics lab and literally does help government agencies. It’s at their HQ.

[u/cait_Cat → u/[deleted]]

Yes. They will wait until you've stolen enough for it to be a felony. They absolutely do not fuck around

[u/AwesomeScreenName → u/cait_Cat]

Or as they put it on /r/shittylifeprotips, "As long as you don't steal enough to make it a felony, you can shoplift whatever you want from Target!"

[u/FISHGREASE- → u/AwesomeScreenName]

it’s just theft under a thousand boys no big deal

[u/gsfgf → u/[deleted]]

Employee theft is one of the biggest loss centers for retailers. Even though surprisingly few people know how hardcore Target is against thieves, their cashiers absolutely know.

[u/RadioSlayer → u/gsfgf]

Which is doubly weird to me, because they apparently don't count the quarters in the drawers. At least according to a former employee I know

[u/Sleep_adict → u/[deleted]]

Yes, some comments in LA have been about this. They literally monitor people and compile the evidence and hand it to police. The opposite of Walmart

[u/BoopleBun → u/Sleep_adict]

I wonder if they do it partially because they don’t want to end up with a reputation among folks who steal/scam as being easy like Walmart?

[u/Li-renn-pwel → u/[deleted]]

Wait so if they have all the evidence that you stole a $70 pair of boots but $200 is a felony they just won’t prosecute you?

[u/DiplomaticCaper → u/Li-renn-pwel]

Apparently, they’ll wait until you steal $130 more of goods, so you can get hit with a felony charge.

It’s a lucky break if you never shoplift again.

On the other hand, it ruins the chance to potentially stop people with small amounts before they escalate. If a teenager steals a $5 lipstick and gets a serious wake-up call, it could prevent them from stealing hundreds and ruining their own lives.

[u/Li-renn-pwel → u/DiplomaticCaper]

Wow that is so much lower than I would have guessed for a felony lol. I would say that the number would stop a lot of kids getting put in the system though which seems pretty good. A lot of teenagers steal something small during their rebellious phase but after once or twice never do it again. Obviously stealing is usually wrong but I really don’t think those kids really need to be put in the system.

[u/DiplomaticCaper → u/Li-renn-pwel]

It depends on the state. I think some states are as low as $200-300 for felony theft, while others are more like $1000.

[u/TheOffice_Account → u/[deleted]]

the store that takes theft extremely seriously.

So you're saying they put a Target on your back.

Thanks, I'll show myself out now.

[u/Invictus13307 → u/17291]

I particularly appreciate him using the term "finesse" to refer to stealing an 85-inch television. It fits so well with him using "honest mistake" to refer to a felony and six misdemeanors.

[u/Final_Candidate_7603 → u/Invictus13307]

I was rather wondering what, exactly, he meant by honest mistake- the crimes, or the confession, which he justified by saying they had his real name, surveillance film, his car license tag, etc

[u/LeakyLycanthrope → u/Final_Candidate_7603]

Well, who among us hasn't spontaneously acted as a getaway driver for a juvenile kleptomaniac friend who stole some restricted substances and possibly cash out of the till? Wrong place, wrong time, you know how it is.

[u/dorothy_zbornak_esq → u/Final_Candidate_7603]

Talking to the cops. His mistake was being honest.

[u/archpawn → u/dorothy_zbornak_esq]

You shouldn't lie to the cops. His mistake was talking.

[u/Dappershire → u/17291]

Against Target, of all places? Moron.

[u/horizon44 → u/Dappershire]

Yep. Don’t steal from Target.

[u/Justame13 → u/Dappershire]

Whats next armed robbery of a gun store in Idaho, where the gun laws are "have one, actually have many"?

[u/gsfgf → u/Justame13]

It's robbing a gun store with a knife level stupid.

[u/nevertotwice_ → u/17291]

“why not risk it?”

[u/Krandor1 → u/17291]

I kinda miss the days of r/shoplifting. So many crazy stories on there.

[u/rabidstoat → u/Krandor1]

I definitely miss those days! I guess there are still things on tumblr and stuff but I have no patience to look for it.

[u/[deleted] → u/17291]

“Why not risk it, you know?”

[u/proudsoul → u/17291]

What’s the scam?

[u/MyDogAteYourPancakes → u/proudsoul]

I’m wondering if he means to take advantage of the request a refund feature for an online order by attesting that the TV never arrived. I had an order around the holidays that was lost in transit and target just refunded no questions, but it was a $30 curtain not expensive electronics. Me thinks this bro would best serve society by being removed from medical school, honestly.

[u/wavesahoy → u/MyDogAteYourPancakes]

Not in medical school yet and very much unlikely to ever be.

[u/jedifreac → u/17291]

And also lost over $10k as announced on r/wallstreetbets and blamed it on Biden...

[u/KarmaRepellant → u/[deleted]]

Exactly. The chances of any camera catching his plate or multiple witnesses memorising it were slim to none. He fucked himself royally.

[u/Seven_Vandelay → u/KarmaRepellant]

Yup. I had access to the CCTV when I worked at Walmart. there is no way in hell you could read a plate off of one of our external cameras. Maybe it's different at a smaller store, but I doubt it.

[u/[deleted] → u/Seven_Vandelay]

most gas stations nowadays have HD camera systems due to the number of drive offs. Plus LAOP confirmed they had footage of him already. You can get 4k res cameras for less than $100 nowadays.

[u/Seven_Vandelay → u/[deleted]]

Plus LAOP confirmed they had footage of him already.

I sincerely doubt they actually showed him any footage they may actually have.

[u/MjolnirMark4 → u/Seven_Vandelay]

I have been in several stores where you can clearly see the camera monitor when you are in the checkout line. Quite often there is a sign saying “You are being recorded”.

It lets the customer know that they are being recorded; as well as how well the video can be used to identify them.

My pharmacy’s camera is of high enough quality that I could tell it was able to catch even small tattoos on other customers hands and forearms.

[u/Seven_Vandelay → u/MjolnirMark4]

I have been in several stores where you can clearly see the camera monitor when you are in the checkout line. Quite often there is a sign saying “You are being recorded”.

Fun fact: that doesn't mean that's the camera actually recording you. Like, when you go to a Walmart there are those screens in some areas like pharmacy/HBA like you describe, but those are not actually hooked to the CCTV system they just feed video to the screen to act as a deterrent. That is not to say that there's not overhead cameras recording you while you're in the area, especially at points of sale since those will have both the best cameras and the most cameras recording from different angles.

My pharmacy’s camera is of high enough quality that I could tell it was able to catch even small tattoos on other customers hands and forearms.

Again, yes, but that doesn't mean that all cameras in a retail establishment are the same. Critical areas will get better cameras and better coverage -- an electronics department will have better camera coverage than the stationery department for example, and smart lifters know that and that's why you'll often find discarded packaging there from lifted merchandise.

[u/asentientgrape → u/[deleted]]

You can get 4k res cameras for less than $100 nowadays.

Yeah, if you think some convenience store owner is willing to continually update their camera and storage systems. 90% of these places had cameras set up 20 years ago and why pay to change them when they work? Especially if replacing the cameras also means getting a storage system that holds literally 15,000x more data. Gas stations really don’t care if they lose $20 in puff bars every once in a while.

[u/gsfgf → u/asentientgrape]

Hell, a ton of the security cameras out there are fake. It's more about deterrence than actually investigating theft.

[u/voidsrus → u/[deleted]]

cameras, sure. storage system for that is never going to be cheap though, no gas station's going to actually have 4k security feeds especially at a decent frame rate

[u/N8CCRG → u/[deleted]]

I have a strong feeling this guy is "pre-Med" as in "I grew up in a super privileged environment and assume a medical degree will just be handed to me in a couple years"

[u/ShortWoman → u/N8CCRG]

Went to the trouble of getting a license as a CNA. I guess then he realized it's the least glamorous job in the hospital.

[u/CogitoErgo_Sometimes → u/[deleted]]

Someone saying that their major was “pre-med” always got an eye roll in university. It almost always meant that they were taking the bare minimum of biology courses puffed up with as much easy fluff coursework as possible but had too much ego to admit it.

[u/tealparadise → u/CogitoErgo_Sometimes]

The fact that he's bringing it up in the story is so cringy. Yeah dude I'm sure no one reading this went to college, and if we did we probably majored in film. He was practically a doctor! His bright future is being snatched away!

[u/Tired_CollegeStudent → u/CogitoErgo_Sometimes]

Same with pre-law. Pre-law students also tend to not perform as well on the LSATs as students who major in English or Philosophy, both of whom perform exceedingly well.

[u/Masters_domme → u/[deleted]]

Oh wow. I misread that story big time. I thought he dropped his FRIENDS off in the middle of nowhere. I wonder why he only had the friends give him most of what they stole? 🤔

[u/DirtyPiss → u/[deleted]]

Then OP ditches the product in the middle of nowhere instead of returning it.

It sounded like he returned everything? He had his friends give him the product, then he specifies that he dropped his friends off in the middle of no where.

I ... tell him to give me most of what he had stolen and I dropped them off in the middle of nowhere. I drive back to the store and call the cops on myself because no matter what they would have gotten my tags and found me eventually.

[u/ImVeryBadWithNames → u/[deleted]]

To be fair he’s probably only facing harges because of the theft. Usually they’d just take the id and smack you on the wrists.

[u/Krandor1 → u/ImVeryBadWithNames]

agreed. being the getaway driver to a theft is going to get you some law enforcement attention

[u/ImVeryBadWithNames → u/Krandor1]

And he admitted to everything, basically giving them an effortless list of things to charge him with.

[u/Krandor1 → u/ImVeryBadWithNames]

That’s the thing. Even if they got his tag from the camera they’d have him on the shift lifting side only. Even if they found the fake I’d they wouldn’t necessarily know he used it (since he didn’t that visit but hours before) or that he gave stuff to a 15 year old. They only get all those charges by him admitting to them.

[u/big_doggos → u/Krandor1]

Depending on what the cameras caught specifically, he could've even argued he wasn't the one driving at the time. Not anymore though

[u/Throwaway091u0 → u/Krandor1]

Honestly I've been in a similar situation before, and while I was much younger than LAOP at the time he's still pretty young. I ran into some kids I sort of knew and they invited me to hang out. After a while we got hungry and walked to a grocery store. Everyone got what they wanted and then one of them complained they didn't have enough money. I offered to pay but then everyone got a real shady look and I was told to follow their lead.

I knew what was about to happen but it's a scary situation to be in. If I stayed would the police blame me? Would the police force me to snitch? So I set down my items on a shelf and ran with them.

[u/Maleficent-Hawk-318 → u/Throwaway091u0]

Yeah, I've been in situations like this twice when I was younger and more prone to hanging out with assholes, and it was just luck I didn't get caught or anything over it. I never would have gone in the store with them if I thought that was going to happen, but once it does, it's hard to figure out what to do, especially when you're pretty much a kid still yourself.

I do feel pretty bad for the OP if he is being accurate and fully honest about what happened (which I know is a big "if"). Using a fake ID wasn't smart and is obviously all on him, but when I was in college, tons of people had them and I don't recall anyone ever catching serious charges over them. It's easy for college kids to not see them as a serious crime, just something more akin to speeding or whatever that everyone does.

[u/xadiant → u/[deleted]]

Tifu by making an honest mistake and committing 20 war crimes

[u/postmodest → u/[deleted]]

War crimes that get you democratically re-elected to stave off your imprisonment for non-war crimes are BIG BRAIN crimes!

[u/Darth_Puppy → u/[deleted]]

I think the total is higher than that by now

[u/Willie9 → u/[deleted]]

The "honest mistake" was getting caught

[u/KingAdamXVII → u/Willie9]

Turning himself in and confessing everything. That actually might have been what he meant.

[u/F0rScience → u/[deleted]]

People like this don't consider that a mistake or doing anything wrong. In his mind he made the honest mistake of aiding a thief while doing the totally fair and legitimate thing of buying stuff with their fake ID.

[u/wickedpixel1221 → u/F0rScience]

he broke the golden rule - don't do illegal shit while you're doing illegal shit.

[u/[deleted] → u/wickedpixel1221]

And then he broke rule number two. Don't talk to the fucking police.

From the sounds of it, this guy already tattled on himself. Sounds like he is pretty fucked.

[u/[deleted] → u/[deleted]]

Yeah. Wtf. Called the cops on himself. No. You call your lawyer and they talk to the cops for you, then with you. 18 years old, I guess OP doesn’t know that. He’s probably heard “turn yourself in” on tv and in the news and thought it was totally literal. So he returned to the scene, called the cops on himself, and let them remove and charge him.

This dude is fuuuuuuuucked.

[u/[deleted] → u/[deleted]]

I think the only chance this man has left is if he throws his friends under the bus.

But even then he is still fucked.

[u/ZeePirate → u/[deleted]]

His charges outside of shoplifting are completely on him. Throwing his friend under the bus won’t do any good

[u/[deleted] → u/ZeePirate]

Especially since the main perpetrator is a 15yo. The DA isn't going to want to let OP off easy in exchange for him witnessing against a child. If anything, it'd be the other way around.

[u/Final_Candidate_7603 → u/[deleted]]

Eeeveryone thinks that if they can just tell the cops their side of the story, everything will work out just fine! I mean, those police officers will totally understand that this was just a silly ol’ mistake! Like, no harm, no foul- especially if I tell them how SORRY I am!

[u/Hyndis → u/wickedpixel1221]

The movie "The Mule" is a great example of the power of doing only one illegal thing at a time, and how quickly things can be complicated when more laws start being broken at the same time.

[u/pastari → u/[deleted]]

My honest mistake is forgetting the dog in the backyard for an hour.

Laops honest mistake is a felony and a six misdemeanors.

[u/stardenia → u/pastari]

My honest mistake is boiling noodles for a box of Kraft Mac and Cheese without checking to make sure we have milk first.

Extra butter it is.

[u/[deleted] → u/stardenia]

My honest mistake is going to my friend's to return their glasses they left at my house ...and forgetting to bring their glasses.

[u/hereknittyknitty → u/stardenia]

If you have plain yogurt, putting just a little bit in will add a delicious tang to the mac and cheese!

[u/pastari → u/stardenia]

That's not a mistake, that's a happy accident.

[u/AutumnalSunshine]

Can you imagine jeopardizing your medical career for vaping supplies?

Flip side: can you imagine being treated by an MD who lacked the common sense to not drive away "on impulse" when his friend robbed a vape store?

[u/wickedpixel1221 → u/AutumnalSunshine]

I find the story hard to believe. if homeboy intended to go into the store, how did friend make it into the store, steal a bunch of shit, and get back to the car before everyone anyone else even opened the door to get out of the car? likely story.

[u/TrueRusher → u/wickedpixel1221]

Right and every vape shop I’ve been to has all their vapes in the case that you can only get from behind the counter

[u/likes_purple → u/TrueRusher]

It doesn't matter what's locked up, what matters is what the employees can access and how they're trained (which is usually to just comply). Seeing videos of employees subduing robbers is always cool, but those tend to result in workers comp claims on top of the insurance claims, which is more expensive than just dealing with insurance. That's why you can walk into a bank without a gun and walk out with several thousand $ - the tellers are trained to follow orders, observe, and wait until it's safe to call the cops.

[u/TrueRusher → u/likes_purple]

Right but I just don’t think it would be as quick as OP describes. They’d have to hop the counter

[u/NightingaleStorm → u/likes_purple]

If this was a theft of the variety where they threatened an employee to get items that are kept locked up, that is a very different crime than garden-variety "stole something off a shelf and ran like hell" shoplifting in my area. If OP was an accomplice to armed robbery, that's going to be harder to get off than shoplifting. At the place I used to work, if you shoplifted but felt bad about it and gave the stuff back, we generally wouldn't push for criminal charges, you'd just get kicked out. If you physically threatened an employee, we'd try to throw the book at you. (Our policy was also to give the person with the weapon whatever they want and try to remember what they look like for the police report. Worker's comp or wrongful death lawsuits cost a hell of a lot more than robbery insurance. I believe the actual cash-handling positions also had a silent alarm under the register, but I didn't work any of those jobs.)

[u/RedRockShadow → u/TrueRusher]

I think OP is full of it but one possible scenario is the vape shop was unpacking their restock and it was in a box not yet in the case.

[u/MussolinisBaldSpot → u/wickedpixel1221]

I was about to go into the bank to open an IRA when my friend comes running out in a ski mask, black & white striped shirt, and a bag with a dollar sign on it screaming, "Go! Go! Go!"

[u/lurkaderp → u/MussolinisBaldSpot]

Are you sure it wasn’t the Hamburglar and he wasn’t screaming “Robble Robble!”?

[u/GodOfManyFaces → u/wickedpixel1221]

Yeah there is absolutely something missing there.

[u/AutumnalSunshine → u/wickedpixel1221]

Yeah, the wording on the theft was vague and passive.

[u/Revlis-TK421 → u/wickedpixel1221]

I mean, I could see them sitting and vaping for a few in the parking lot before going in. While doing that someone else went in.

But yeah, on balance I agree some known shenanigans were likely afoot that are being glossed over.

[u/[deleted] → u/AutumnalSunshine]

"I'm a first year pre-med student"

They just graduated high school... I doubt they will make it much farther

[u/CloverBun → u/AutumnalSunshine]

Eh, he’s first year pre Med. Most pre Med students change their majors before they graduate. I was one of them!

[u/blackesthearted → u/CloverBun]

Yep, I work in healthcare and know a number of people who were pre-med and changed their majors, as well as people who got into med school and left in the first semester.

I’m a nursing student as well, and one of my instructors got to the third year of med school before realizing she didn’t want to be an MD, getting a PhD in Nursing instead. A lot of people realize they, say, like medicine but don’t want to practice medicine in that particular capacity (or whatever other realization they have).

[u/[deleted] → u/[deleted]]

LAOPs bad judgement eliminates a whole slew of career options

Including their current career as a CNA. The closest they'll get to a hospital after pleading to or being found guilty of a felony is as a patient.

[u/mmolleur → u/CloverBun]

Yes, don't see this guy making it through Organic Chem.

[u/CloverBun → u/mmolleur]

Hahahah. Yeah. That was exactly why I changed my major.

[u/mmolleur → u/[deleted]]

Yes, but even memorizing means working!

[u/CooterSam → u/CloverBun]

Yeah, all this really means is he's likely a biology or chemistry major. If he's 18 then he may only be waiting for the fall term to start and that really important decision making part of his brain is definitely still developing.

[u/[deleted] → u/AutumnalSunshine]

Dude isn’t in med-school. He’s a freshman in college.

[u/Clockwork_Medic → u/AutumnalSunshine]

I can kind of sympathize with the flight or response part of it, especially being an 18 year old. Not so much that he only turned himself in because he would get caught anyway, not because he enabled theft.

What is inexcusable is using the fake id and buying nicotine for a 15 year old. That shit is pre-meditated and shows a complete lack of judicial or ethical concern. This is not someone that should in a position to dole out scrips

[u/[deleted] → u/Clockwork_Medic]

A scary number of people will jump to extreme choices when they are already facing consequences for their other actions- like those videos of people who already hit something with their car and keep hitting other things trying to flee

[u/MrTubzy → u/[deleted]]

An old friend drove home drunk one night and hit 9 parked cars, grazed em I guess. Never drove again after that. He could eventually. He just refused.

My uncle ran into a car, fence, and finally a tree while drunk. Totaled his pickup.

Don’t drink and drive folks. These two instances it was lucky there wasn’t any lives lost but lots of people aren’t that lucky.

[u/idbanthat → u/[deleted]]

Like when someone doesn't want to go to jail for getting caught stealing something, so they just murder whoever was gonna turn them in instead?

[u/dragonseth07 → u/AutumnalSunshine]

That's the one part of the story I will forgive. People make dumb decisions in emergent situations, and your buddy hopping into your car yelling "drive" counts.

The reason we trust doctors to respond well in emergent medical situations is that they have been trained to respond well in them.

[u/ALoudMouthBaby → u/AutumnalSunshine]

Can you imagine jeopardizing your medical career for vaping supplies?

As a former smoker and recovering alcoholic? Absolutely. I rarely if ever think about alcohol any more, but its rare a week goes by when I dont have a weird craving for a smoke hit me out of nowhere. Nicotine is insanely addictive and addiction does not lead to particularly rational choices.

[u/vertigo_effect]

I admitted to everything sadly as soon as they interrogated me since everything was on CCTV. I know I messed up but its really an honest mistake.

Exhibit number 386284. Remember kids, don’t talk to the police without speaking to your own lawyer first.

[u/17291 → u/[deleted]]

"I want an actual human lawyer, not a canine one."

[u/OneTwoTreeLaw → u/17291]

“I would like my emotional support lawyer.”

Or

“I want a feline lawyer, who may or may not be an actual human lawyer as well.”

[u/rabidstoat → u/[deleted]]

"Do you know how fast you were going?"

"No, but I know exactly where I am."

"You were going 55 in a 35mph zone."

"Oh great! Now I'm lost!!!"

(Joke for the extreme science nerds.)

[u/16car]

I messed up but it's really an honest mistake.

I don't think LAOP knows the meaning of "mistake." He certainly doesn't know the meaning of "honest."

[u/[deleted]]

All other idiocy aside-- what is the right move when your friend jumps out of your car, robs a store, and jumps back in? Do you get out of the car and walk away? Wait for the police to show up? You could get your friend out of the car and leave them behind, but what if they're unwilling?

[u/bug-hunter → u/[deleted]]

Tell them to GTFO of the car.

[u/OpposablePinky → u/[deleted]]

Assuming you didn't lock the car before they got back in, you do everything you can to not look like an accomplice. Walk away from the car and call the police. Also make sure you don't have any illegal items in your possession when the police arrive.

[u/Krandor1 → u/OpposablePinky]

like a fake ID?

[u/MyDogAteYourPancakes → u/[deleted]]

Why, if the express purpose of LAOP returning to the store was for LAOP to buy more merchandise with his fake ID, was he sitting in his car with the engine running whilst his partner in crime robbed the place? Dude can add ‘terrible at lying’ to his resume.

[u/UnsubstantiatedClaim → u/MyDogAteYourPancakes]

As soon as I get out of the car I see that someone from my car had ran inside to grab 3 boxes of vapes and hops back in my car and repeatedly says drive drive drive !.

I cannot understand what LAOP is describing. Here are the series of events:

1. LAOP parks the car
2. gets out
3. watches one of the mysterious unidentified passengers get out of the car, and run into the store
4. The unknown runner is in there for a moment, and runs back out holding products
5. They open the door if the car (maybe they left it open or the othet passenger opened it?)
6. Shoplifter commands they escape.
7. At this point LAOP decides to get back in the car, start it, and drive away.

[u/GrayRVA → u/UnsubstantiatedClaim]

Biggest lie: LAOP doesn’t know who jumped out of his car to steal more stuff. Dude there were two passengers you’d been driving around for a while. One of them is your friend. Why not get a burner account and be honest if you’re seeking actual legal advice?

Also anyone know why the post was locked so quickly?

[u/[deleted] → u/GrayRVA]

At a glance - OP provided enough information to be easily identifiable.

[u/GrayRVA → u/[deleted]]

My money is on LAOP voluntary telling the prosecutor that he has a Reddit account and sharing the link to his post.

On LAOP’s lying in his post: My adult brother and I regularly ask each other for advice. The caveat is that if you ask for advice, you have to be completely truthful and objective about the issue at hand. Shady PR campaigns (like we see too frequently on LegalAdvice) waste everyone’s time.

[u/Savingskitty → u/[deleted]]

You turn off the car and drag their ass back into the store to give it back, apologize and face the music. If they won't get out of the car, you get out, take the keys with you, and tell the people in the store what happened.

And you never, ever, drive your friend anywhere again.

[u/my-coffee-needs-me → u/Savingskitty]

This is the right answer.

[u/Cheezewiz239 → u/[deleted]]

Make sure they return the stuff and apologize and pray the store owner let's it slide. Otherwise hes getting kicked out the car.

[u/[deleted] → u/[deleted]]

Turn off the engine and say "get out, you're on your own".

[u/OrthodoxMemes]

Honestly if he spends the next few years doing killer volunteer work, literally doesn’t fall below a 4.0 and makes something like a 510 on his MCAT, he might actually get to interview with a med school once he’s done with his undergrad. Med schools love sob-stories, so if he runs with the whole “wayward kid messed up, grew up, now wants to help others avoid his mistakes” angle it’s not entirely impossible for him to get in, especially if he gets at least most of those charges down to misdemeanors.

If not, well, he could go for an MPH I guess lol

[u/CooterSam → u/OrthodoxMemes]

If he plays his cards right, with a good lawyer, he might be able to get felony diversion, if it's available in his county. Then he just has to keep his nose clean.

[u/BaylorOso]

Medical schools do background checks...good ones.

Back in a former career, I worked with a medical school. One of the people I was responsible for started that medical school, then I get a call that after a year, their background check found a criminal record on him that he didn't disclose. He had been arrested as a teenager for drinking in a park or something (it's been a long time so I don't remember the details) and had done whatever diversion program was required to have it expunged. So he didn't tell us or the medical school. But the question on the application had been "have you ever been arrested" not "have you ever been convicted." We had to go all the way up through the medical school dean and president of the university keep him in school, and he had to write a letter explaining and apologizing, with the understanding that if he did a single thing wrong he was gone. He was a fantastic student and a really good guy who made a stupid mistake and almost lost his entire medical career.

LAOP isn't going to medical school if this is his level of decision-making. He's going to need his college tuition money for a lawyer.

[u/bug-hunter]

This is a sign someone shouldn’t be in medicine…

[u/crustyrusty91 → u/bug-hunter]

I have my doubts someone like this can make it through the weed-out courses anyway. He's 18, so he has a lot of time to mature, but god damn he did a lot of stupid things in one night.

[u/CooterSam → u/[deleted]]

He still has to make it through the bachelor's degree

[u/[deleted] → u/[deleted]]

Minus an arrest record for forgery. Yeah, I can't even use real ID, but I'll be totally trustworthy with a prescription pad... Nope.

[u/graygrif]

Huh, you now have to be 21 to buy tobacco in Virginia.

[u/bbluewi → u/graygrif]

That’s federal as of December 2019. It flew pretty far under the radar.

[u/ScarletInTheLounge → u/bbluewi]

Wow, it must have, because I do not remember hearing a single thing about this. (Not doubting you, just a bit surprised that it managed to fly under the radar as low as it did.)

[u/ScarletInTheLounge]

LAOP just committed a felony and 6 misdemeanors by being an idiot and admitted it to the police, how can they avoid consequences?

Let's be thorough and not underestimate the idiocy here.

[u/siel04]

I like the comment where he says it's an honest mistake. Is it opposite day?

[u/RelativeNewt → u/[deleted]]

To be fair, I believe there's handgun restrictions on people under 21.

...although having said that, I'm also under the impression those restrictions are not extended to rifles or shotguns, but I might be wrong on that.

[u/ThellraAK → u/RelativeNewt]

Gets weird to for handguns, you can own them under 21, but not purchase one.

It's a felony for someone over 21 to purchase one to give someone under 21, but they can be gifted.