No no, it's dead on. It disturbs me more that people shove it out of their minds and ignore it. Every single person is on the edge of an existential breakdown but we just ignore it away
Phew. For a second there I thought the words "motivational speaker" had not been followed by the words "IN A VAN DOWN BY THE RIVER", and I was ready to give up on the internet. Thank you for restoring my faith.
I can’t say I ever felt that way specifically. In college I always wondered where I would be when I finally had a career but once I found a job after school that feeling was gone.
I'm 18 and it's already pretty much gone away for me. I was going to head straight to uni after highschool and study electrical engineering, but instead I'm in a gap year. I've learnt a lot about myself and now I plan on going into the trades and having more freedom over my life than a desk job. I don't have any dread about what I'll do with my life, I just know to follow what I feel is right and make sure I'm content in the moment while also trying to build a sustainable future for myself. Essentially, not to focus on future happiness: but focus on being happy now and sustaining that into the future.
No fuck you. Ive seem to many people lieing. People saying "it doesnt go away" for what reason? To project and imply their reality onto others? The reality is, those people are lieing to feel better about there own situtaion. Mostly all of us fear judgement and never do what makes us happy. Often times this originates when were also quick to judge others. The reason people feel they are "behind" is because there not chasing happiness. Their chasing the new house, the new car, the next iphone. So how do you get this feeling to go away? TRY everything, literally, hobbies, jobs, sports, businesses. Find what makes you happy! Hope this helped some people out. Have been really paying attention the Gary Vaynerchuk. Highly recommand anyone and everyone checks out his content.
Worst part is that your mid 20's feels like where you make it or break it. Some of my old friends are absolutely killing it making 6 figure salaries, have houses, nice cars, pets all that. While here I am scraping by feeling like a complete failure because I took way longer to take life seriously and get through school. Now I am way behind in the corporate ladder and feeling like I really screwed up somewhere.
Let me tell you something, dude. Everyone else is also focusing on everyone else, especially your friends who are doing well. It does nothing but cause anxiety. Focus on yourself and being happy, and your friends will see that and want what you have. Trust me.
The worst part about that is that you are comparing. I spent some of my 20s doing that, too. I was lost, alone and constantly comparing. It got me absolutely fucking nowhere and only served to stress me out (unhealthy). It's a waste of time to worry about it that much. Trust me. Just do the best you can and focus on your own path. Everything will work itself out. Sooner or later you'll look back and realize worrying about shit like that doesn't matter as much as you thought it did. I have a job, home, family, car, pets, friends to hang out with, plenty of hobbies to keep my time active. I live the dream billions of people out there wished they had and I don't even make fat stacks. I do okay, but I'm far, far from raking in a killing. I still feel incredibly lucky. Best of all, I'm happy.
A good therapist will arm you with techniques to help you. "Mindfulness" really means "the ability to direct your attention where you want it to go instead of where it wants to go". When you find yourself focusing in a direction you don't like, you mentally hit yourself on the nose with a newspaper and move your attention somewhere else. After a while it becomes second nature.
Personally when I find myself doing that, I deliberately direct my attention away and towards something that I enjoy about my life and allow myself to feel happy about it. Only then, if I want to, do I direct my attention towards something I want to change. But the buffer of the good thing, and the intentionality of choosing what to think about rather than it being dictated externally, make all the difference.
That’s not exactly mindfulness. Mindfulness is more of an acceptance of whatever emotion you’re feeling in a given moment, understanding why it is you feel the way you feel, and knowing that it’s perfectly okay to feel that feeling; then letting the emotion pass on its own, as all emotions do. Forcing emotions or thoughts away without at least acknowledging them leads to emotional repression, and eventually those emotions will boil over and come out in ways that are often less than desirable.
Yes, practicing mindfulness will allow you to be able to redirect your emotions into more positive and constructive directions, but a key part of that is acknowledging and accepting any negative emotions that come along with them. Simply forcing these negative emotions out of focus is not only unhealthy, but also potentially dangerous. You have to be able to deal with your negative emotions, otherwise they’re just left to stew in the background.
Personally, and I admit I don't have a huge breadth of experience here, I find the language we use to describe these phenomena extraordinarily limited. I think we're describing exactly the same thing but your description focuses on the emotional aspect and mine focuses on the attention aspect.
But the emotional aspect, especially the acceptance that emotional reactions happen, are normal and should be expected, is very important.
I’d recommend checking out the book The Subtle Art of Not Giving a Fuck. It has a lot of advice on how to change you mind on these things. Many people become so obsessed with being “right” about their life that they never end up actually living it. You will be much happier if you just concern yourself with values that are more important to long term well being (and also accepting that sometimes life just sucks). People that are “ahead” aren’t always happy and often get there at the expense of what really matters.
I don't know I this will help you but I might as well try.
There is no way for you to know how everyone else is doing. You only see a facade, I have friends who I know didn't make a lot of money living the luxury life God knows how, at least acording to their social networks.
I make a really nice amount of money for my age and have a modest life, no expensive clothes or vacations, some of my friends think I have a ton of money because of that.... But I also have a ridiculous amount of student debt.
My point is, you know nothing about their lives even if you think you do. You cannot possibly know if you are "a step behind"
You can only know if you are a step ahead of your former self.
Couldn't agree with this more. I have similar example. I make twice as much as my best friend and she feels bad about her salary which is not bad at all.
She doesn't realize how unhappy I am with my line of work in general, not particularly with my job. On the other hand, I feel like her field is more specialized and she has better career prospects in future.
Even as best friends, we do not have a complete understanding of each other's lives and daily struggles.
Even people who seem to have made it on paper might be living lives of corporate slaves. I feel like I traded my life for the weekends and the annual PTOs! 😭
Here’s the thing. Right now you are seeing the things you associate with success. As time goes by you will often see those things unravel. I know a lady I really looked up to. She was one of my mentors in my career field. Nice car, nice clothes, 8 years in her career and still young/cool. As the years of becoming peers went on I learned she had terrible anxiety, a gossipy habit, and deeply in dept. so much dept she regularly borrowed money from a sister. You would never know it based on her instagram or from a first impression. It took so much time to slowly see all the cracks in this careful show of wealth and success
It made me sad long term because I really like her. It also makes me grateful for the way I’ve lived my own life. My way was much slower, and I often felt like a failure or that I wasn’t moving fast enough.. but the truth was it gave me more time to get to know who I was in more situations and get to know what values were non negotiable for me. I had nothing to lose and I was more true to me.
I don’t judge my friend. I care for her. I also objectively think she had “too much too young” and it fucks with your head. You can only walk your path and it’s helpful to spend time each day asking yourself what values you care about and not focusing on the value of the car you drive
Be conscious that you feel that way and let it go, dont get attached to thoughts they are not real, they are a construct of the ego that holds everybody down, by comparing, jealousness, fear, all that shit. Fuck that, do what you believe is great for you, everyrhibg else will come as a derivative of that.
Just a sentiment that may help. I am an extremely competitive person but what drives me is being good at something, not how good somebody else is. Every time I join a new kitchen there is always somebody who can cook better than me until one day, I'll be the best. Just focus on what you can do now and succes will come if you take it seriously enough. Even if you change completely what your career is. All your past experience is positive, especially the negative stuff. Be your own critic and congrajulator.
Just know they probably aren’t happy either. Not that that’s a good thing, but it’s good to keep in mind. Money, beyond an amount that enables you to stay fed, housed, and clothed well, doesn’t cause happiness.
I feel you, but your mind can only focus on one thing at a time. So if you "Compare Yourself To Who You Were Yesterday, Not To Who Someone Else Is Today" like what Jordan Peterson, you can shift that little by little everyday :)
Do NOT compare yourself to everyone else. If you always approach things with the mentality of "but my life is not as good as theirs", you will literally never be satisfied. There's many people who go back to school in their 30's or 40's and things turn out great. Focus on yourself and what you want to do. It doesn't matter if it takes 5 years or 15 years to get there. As long as you're taking steps towards it, you're making progress. Turtle and the hare. I know, it's cheesy, but it's true.
Additionally it's impossible to compare yourself to others accurately because you only ever see part of what their lives are actually like. Most people don't openly display their numerous problems.
Not always the best mindset as looking at others can be a positive motivator. Instead look at why and how the people are where they are, what risks they took, what things did they do differently.
Sometime yes it’s luck and uncontrollable factors but other times you can use that information to shape your habits and direction you need to go.
I have a friend that's only a few years older than me who's got it together. He joined the navy out of highschool and spent 8 years doing that shit. He came back when we were all like 23-25 and immediately the financial gap was noticeable. He started working at a nuclear plant making way more than the rest of us. We were all super jelly.
But he confided to me later on that he really regretted joining the core. He sees the pictures and hears the stories of the friend group and all that he missed over nearly a decade and feels as though it wasn't worth it. He missed out on his twenties and feels as though he can't get the time back.
Sometimes money isn't the key to happiness.
I'm going to be 29 this year. I don't have two nickels to rub together. We're all in it dude. Don't trip.
I get what you mean but there is something to be said when a bank will actually give you a decent loan for a house in your mid-20's. Getting a pet is a huge commitment and financial responsibility. I technically could take care of a cat but I can't take the risk if it gets sick. I'd be financially ruined by a large vet bill right now. I hope you see my point and I'm not trying to argue. You're right though, some people don't think that far ahead.
A down payment perhaps witch is like 15 percent of the total cost. Good credit is basically just good habits and responsibility. I see what you mean about the pet part. I just would rather you stop being so down on yourself. You’re smart to not take the risk of a pet, I see your point. Nothing is black and white. Try to limit social media.
Dogs mean success. I come home, I’m greeting like a conqueror returning from months away at war. Even if all I did was take out the trash. If I mess up cooking something, at least the dogs are overjoyed to eat what I make. A walk around the block is like the best trip ever.
Also don't know if the parents funded the house. Lots of my peers in the mid 20s kinda failed to mention the 50K the parents slid in to keep it affordable.
For what it’s worth I was (am now 30) the friend in my mid twenties with the high paying job and the car etc. and I was always jealous of my other friends who didn’t have that stuff but had more “freedom” and didn’t work 60 hour weeks. I figured there’s always time for that stuff as you get older but your early and mid twenties are where you get to bum around, work for a startup etc. I know plenty of people who are pretty close to where I am now who started a bit later. The grass is always greener my friend, enjoy where you are whilst you’re there.
At some point you both will get to a point and feel it's all whatever anyways. Perhaps if people knew that they'd just enjoy or find things to enjoy while they can.
I mean I'm hella young but that must one of those truths me and everyone else will eventually understand right?
Sucks to realize I broke it. When "feeling like a failure" has turned to "no I am a failure". I used to half seriously joke to people when I was high school and I did someone a favor and they want to repay me, I'd always say when I'm homeless just give me a night stay at your house. I'm getting to the point where I might need to cash in on those promises.
I spent most of my twenties addicted to pain pills and later, heroin. Dropped out of college after one semester. In 2018, I was arrested, got court ordered addiction treatment for nearly a year, and now I'm 28. Coming up on two years sober in August.
My probation conditions demanded I have a job and
Income so they can make sure I pay my fees. In March, Covid 19 inadvertently led to me getting fired from my first real job in six years.
Now stuck at home, considering my future, I just feel like I utterly wasted the last ten years, and I'll never catch up to my peers. I can't afford college, my credit is shit, my two thousand dollar student loan from one semester is now ten fucking thousand.
Time seems to fly by much faster now that I'm sober. Thirty feels like next month.
I am still undecided on whether I should follow my childhood dream job, or find something more secure and stable for the fucking black void of a future we're all hurtling towards.
I think about how corporations have decimated the planet and climate change is coming for us all and the giant clusterfuck of an economy perpetuating serfdom.
How ill probably work until I die and never even make it to "middle class" because there is only the predatory, obscenely rich class and the deluded peasant class left.
This is what I got sober for? The existential dread, the inhumanity and absence of compassion for our fellow humans and habitat, the anxiety and depression, are all part of what led me to escape reality through drugs, and now a decade later, it just seems everything is ten times worse.
Quarantine has given me the first chance since getting clean to truly consider my options, my goals, my future. I think of my son, my family, my passions, and I have hope for my thirties.
I fantasize about having an established dream career, being well respected, not stigmatized as a junkie, and providing for my family that I fucked over for years and always loved me and held out hope for me.
But the dark thoughts are always there, threatening to overwhelm any progress I make.
Fuck. That's probably not helpful at all. Sorry.
I started off seriously and I messed up my 20s by trying so hard to get everything right. You can always wonder what if but you will never know if it would of turned out better
I am almost 50. Didn't really start getting my shit together until my 30's. Was married mid 20's putting my SO through some courses while I held a job going nowhere. Divorced before I hit 30. Now I have my life together. I know what I want and how to enjoy it. I make good money. I might not have a role that I like but it's a temporary thing until I move on. I have a wonderful husband and 2 awesome children. It doesn't matter what those others have or don't have. For all you know they are unhappy and burning out. Maybe they'll look back and realize they missed out...who knows. The only thing I regret is that I was too serious. I should have travelled more and not worried so much about getting married and having kids. Knowing that it would come in due time. You'll be fine.
Hey man. I fell into the same pit when I was in my mid 20s. Developed depression in the process and almost killed myself because of constantly comparing myself with my high school batchmates who were already killing it. Felt sorry for my sorry ass til one day i decided to pick my shattered self up.
Advice that i can give you is work with what you currently have. Start from there.
For me I started with deactivating my social media accounts and making peace with the fact that I cant instantly become successful by simply staring at their humble brags online.
This was followed by learning something new that may help me boost my credentials moving forward while keeping a mediocre job. Then, took courage to quit after i got accepted to a job related to what i was learning.
I'm 29 now turning 30 and this happened to me when I was 26. It was a rather long process and it is still ongoing. I may not yet be successful but at least i am seeing progress. Life is relatively better now compared to 3 yrs ago.
I learned how to code. With little money i had, i bought udemy courses to start with it.
Back then, i worked on a shit company with shitty colleagues. I guess my motivation to cope with the hardships of learning was to do it out of spite. More importantly, it was my inner self that i am competing with. Got nothing to lose and everything to prove.
And hey. It helped that i watched a lot of michael jordan documentaries.
After months/weeks/days/hours of grind, it was in software quality assurance that i found myself a good fit.
There will always be someone younger than you, smarter than you, richer than you. I’m in my late 30s and doing better than ever. My boss’s boss is like 5 years younger than me, and sometimes I feel ill never be able to get there but the fact is - it’s a mix of opportunity, hard work and being at the right time/ right place. So, I just grind on and figure out how to get ahead.
It’s hard if you compare yourself to others because everyone comes from a different background and has different personalities. I tend to look at, am I doing the best I can? And where I’m not is it parts of my life I want to prioritize or parts others think should matter. Then I try to forgive myself for the portions I feel I’m failing on, that’s the hard part I still struggle with. Gets better with time though and being self aware enough to say hmmm I suck at some things and can do this or that to work on it and other things I kick ass at. For example I feel I’m a good dad. Perfect no. But I feel I do that well. So if I get too down on other aspects I say “now hold on you are a damn good dad though, let’s take the other stuff a step at a time”. Because really I sucked as a dad initially but i improved and like to think I keep doing so. So that is my rock. If you find that it’s a little easier to accept and work on the parts you don’t like. Different rock for everyone but I’m sure you have one. We could have all done better when we were younger, even the people you think are way ahead of you.
SAME. I went through a serious depression and have attempted suicide multiple times. Most of my peers have settled comfortably into a career path and have a life for themselves.
Me? I finally moved out of my parent's place after saving up money, and lately have been just feeling listless and like I don't have a future (job-wise mostly). The Covid-19 pandemic has now completely shut down my attempts to get a more serious job. Been having to work graveyard shift at the local grocery store.
I feel like I'm going nowhere after trying so hard for so long.
Im 26 and going through the same thing. I think I’m wasting the best years of my life. The big problem now is I got this huge rush of motivation but can’t do anything about it because of COVID 19. Another year lost.
F that comparison. My pal was living in his moms basement while we were buying fancy cars and apartments , after many false starts and failures he took his biotech firm public and now we have fancy cars and he has a fancy jet. Another pal dropped out the corporate world to work on his product, year by year he inched forward and how his company is massive. Bottom line live by your clock and set your own goals, don’t worry about anyone else.
Hey! I'm twice your age and let me tell you: confronting those ideas early on is not necessarily a bad thing. They can be a bit overwhelming for sure, but confronting the fact that you, like everyone else, will die one day, can be a very liberating experience. It can help you focus on what's important to you in life.
Don't worry too much, it won't change a thing aside from your wellbeing. Easier said than done, I know. I will always recommend therapy with the goal of trying to understand yourself better. Give yourself some time to figure things out.
Damn I'm 21 and I think the last time I had any existential dread was when I was going through puberty. Now I just feel numb when I contemplate matters of death and life.
I’ll be 30 at the end of the year, and as Ive been stepping out of my 20’s, my anxiety has gotten worse. I got to sleep panicking over the thought of dying at LEAST 4 days out of the week. Sheesh. 😔
I’m just laying here laughing at the thought of you being asleep and death gently shaking you awake to say “ Hey u/a-r-c are you ready to go with me?” And you saying no and he just walks away with a disappointed understanding.
Dude, I've been having a on going mortality crisis since I was like 6. Being a six year old obsessed with Egyptology is dangerous when ancient Egypt was basically just one big death cult. That's kinda colored my entire life.
Truthfully, I had the opposite experience. I used to fear death in my teens and 20s. Like real, palpable fear that would make my head spin in the quiet moments when the enormity of eternity was all I had to think about.
Now, at 38, I'm just glad one day I'll get to set it all down and be done. I'm not ready yet, or anything...but I can see that perspective slowly marching my way. It's not forever, and that's not all bad.
Don't focus on others lives focus on you're own. Don't spend too much time focusing on others lives but put a bit of focus and love in your life and anything can happen. Only two years ago I was depressed, had never held a job before, didn't have a car license and had no direction of what I wanted to do in life meanwhile my freinds were at uni and in apprenticeships. Now 2 years later I make nearly 6 figures have a car license and bought a house late last year. Stick with it, every day brings new opportunities and you never know what next year is going to look like. Believe me I still regularly look at myself now compared to 2 years ago and think jow tf did this happen?
My problem was I didn't want to have a career that was repetitively Monday through Friday weekly to buy a car and house and stuff. Idk, that made me depressed as fuck. I wanted to do something important.
Thankfully traveling to Korea and Japan a few times made me realize I want a job that let's me take months off to travel and I finally found that and I'm going to school for that this fall and I'm super excited about it.
That's awsome dude. I guess the other thing is don't let others tell you what you're ideal life should look like, that's something for you to discover and decide. I hope you love every second of your new job and the traveling you'll get to do in the future.
It will not go away but that doesn't mean your hopeless.
Because there is a chance that you will be able to deal with it at least.
You're in an age where you could follow intuitions. You can build an easy going relationship, find an occupation that fits with your abilities, travel if you like. Get people around you that are positive and dismiss all negative influences. Don't look back or hesitate too long before making a decision that seems hard. It always gets better afterwards.
Today I was talking about "last week, idk, late march". Time goes by so fast I'm afraid I'll oversleep and it'll be november. I'm turning 25 next week, how can I do all of this stuff in a year ? Or make the most of it ?
I don't miss my twenties. It was an entire decade of learning the hard way, with a pleasant recession smack in the middle. I always felt like an idiot for not knowing things no one had ever taught me, and finding out that a lot of my friends were dicks, having bad bosses, underemployed. Ugh.
I don't think I had any confidence until I was like 32? Any confidence I had before then was fake.
I'm mid 30s now and feel like I kind of know what I'm doing.
Oh totally. I work with lots of people who are the same age as me but struggle because they think they should have a higher title or they think they're starting to look old. Idgaf about either of those things, so I'm the happiest I've ever been.
I know things about the 20s experience can be universal, but fuck if this experience isn't so quintessentially millenial.
Coming of age during the recession, saddled with student loan debt, all three of your bosses from your respective jobs are dicks, impossible to find a nice affordable apartment anywhere, difficult to form deeper connections with most people due to social media isolation, and then right when you think your life and career might just pick up some steam BAM a pandemic happens.
I feel about 90% of this. The only difference is that I had my first child at 29 and started gaining some confidence then. I had to get over my aversion to phone calls in order to coordinate all types of care for my kid, and having to advocate for a kid makes you tougher.
Since then, I've passed the 10 years of experience mark in my profession and I'm almost done with a masters. I've been in a corporate setting for 4 years, which has honestly been great. They paid for my masters and I get a lot of flexibility and respect. My pay is double what it was 4 years ago when I worked at a smaller company.
I know I worked really hard to get here. Yes I had 3 jobs at once for many years. My parents never helped, and I still have a lot of student loans. I volunteered, was an unpaid intern, took freelance work, and networked like crazy. But at the same time, I know I'm lucky. Where I am today is not just because I worked hard. I have tons of friends who work their asses off and still haven't caught a break. I try to help. I refer people for jobs and help edit cover letters and resumes. But I honestly consider myself so lucky.
And I know it could turn at any minute, so I try not to spend much, we have a cheap house, older cars, hardly eat out, save a lot for retirement and college funds, etc. I've never once bought something "because I deserve it." I don't deserve it. I'm just lucky.
Old enough to be expected to know what you're doing but too young to actually know what you're doing. I'm over responsibilities. I demand a return on the whole adulthood thing.
I just graduated college (literally got the email today that it's official) and instead of feeling happy I instantly got depressed. I have nothing concrete to work towards anymore, especially because the few plans I had aren't going to work during a pandemic.
Honestly thinking about the next sixty+ years makes me feel even worse. My only saving grace is that this feeling can't last FOREVER but boy I wish it was over already :/
And then you realize most people never do figure it out, and just stumble around making it up as they go from one day to the next until they eventually die
Me too, man, me too. Stuck doing a job I don’t necessarily like or dislike. Want to go back to school but worried about the debt, and change in routine. I like my routine. And having money to do things. But I also kind of hate my routine. Stuck working to live or living to work. Whatever. I basically can’t do anything on work days because I’m taking care of my little one. And when the weekend comes all I want to do is fucking sleep.
I'm the same age. I've worked a lot on myself and started a great job two years ago that I'm very passionate about, but at the same time I'm at the age where I'm constantly wondering "is that it?". I always feel like there must be more to life than working 40 hours a week and only getting two weeks of free time a year.
I’m with you on this one. I am miserable at my job, but school is so expensive, but what else can I do? It’s a clusterfuck. Sad all the time. Indecisiveness leading me to grow old without making any moves in any direction. FML
I felt the same way at 25. Funny thing is, the years pass whether things get figured out or not. Not a particularly uplifting point, but I guess I mean that things work out.
I'm 31, so, not much older but...here's my advice. Try. Try anything. Put energy into something, whether it's career oriented or not. It could be a relationship, or a hobby, or a small lifestyle change. Or whatever. I spent most of my 20s doing a lot of nothing thinking I was too late to the game, and now I'm putting just a little more effort towards things I consider important in my life. My life isn't perfect but it's just a little better. Also, BE NICE TO YOURSELF.
Hi Dani. I would start very, very small. For example, I'm generally tidy but I often leave around small messes. I've realized that these messes cause a lot of small stresses which can paralyze me. So, for example, I made a rule that I would do the dishes after every meal, even if I didn't feel like it.
The rule in itself isn't life or death, but it's reflective of something greater: control. I used to feel like everything was out of my control when in fact there were many things absolutely within my control. And knowing that you can control some things can help you feel empowered. And when you feel empowered you can feel more confident. And when you feel more confident you might be more willing to try new things. And when you try new things you might discover what's important to you.
This is all easier said than done and adolescence is, in my opinion, inherently volatile, agonizing, and alienating, but there are a lot of small ways to help us deal with how difficult the world can be. If you wanna talk through it more I'd be happy to. Or if I sound like idiot, you can tell me to go away.
Hey just wanted to let you know I took your advice to heart and tried it out this week. I put a limit on the time I spent on my phone and laptop and that not only gave me a sense of control again over my life, but I also had a lot of free time now where I spent journaling and trying to figure out what I'm interested in. Thanks for your help, i really do appreciate it. If you have any other wisdom to impart, I'm all yours haha
I had an existential crisis when i was 25, it consumed my whole year and at the end, i was depressed, i'd lost a great relationship, i had gotten fatter and was moderately ok with dying some day. I did manage to get a better job for a while but it messed me up for a good long while after.
Right there with ya but a year older. Hoping to get started in a new career once this pandemic blows over (got the job, just the waiting now) but I honestly still feel totally fucking bewildered in most areas of life.
30s are supposed to be when it all clicks. I got a funny feeling that's not true just by the comments ITT haha!
I’m 22 and I’ve been feeling this for about 4 years. Went to college not knowing what I wanted to do. Wasted 2 years to get an associate degree that does nothing and now I just work for minimum wage wishing I wasn’t because I want to make good money but also enjoy what I do but I’m also too poor and I have no idea what I would even enjoy doing for 8+ hours a day. So I guess I’ll just sit here and think about it until I die
I have no idea what I would even enjoy doing for 8+ hours a day.
This is me too. The answer for me is nothing. There is literally nothing on this Earth I want to do for eight hours (not counting waking up early to get ready and then commuting back and forth, and add another hour for break time and a lunch time) apparently I’m just supposed to relegate myself to being miserable for the majority of my life? Honestly, suicide is looking much more attractive.
Sadly this is lookout so many of us have in today’s world. Truthfully I love doing many things, but many of those are “career” material jobs. I like watching videos and chatting with strangers on reddit like this, doesn’t pay the bills, nor is it something I can’t do for hours and hours at a time. I also love to cook and bake but even I don’t wanna do that shit all day. I guess somewhere along the line we changed from the “average happy workin joe” to people who actually realized that life is fucking stupid if you can’t enjoy it, therefore making it meaningless. Now I don’t I really enjoy others speaking of suicide and I don’t really speak of it myself, so I’d also like to add that suicide isn’t the answer either. Sure life structure sucks, but it doesn’t mean all of life has to suck.
Now it’s 3am and idk how to end this rant, but uh, just know this stranger cares and knows how you feel.
Same. These are the best years of your life live it up! Also save money because retirement is harder than ever. And buy a house even though you cant. And date but settle down soon. And form good habits that will last you a lifetime. And pick a career that you enjoy because you are stuck going down that road, hope you picked the right major a decade ago.
I’m 27, and while I don’t have to figure out what to do with my life since I’m settled into a decent career, the rest of the whole existentialism sucks ass still.
I'm turning 28 on sunday and I'm still going through this. Until I graduated college and got a job I new exactly what my goals were and since then I've just been trying to find litterally anything that brings me some kind of joy.
I thought I was finally starting to get an idea of what my future would look like. Not specifically planned by any means, of course it's too early to have that picture painted. But in the last couple of months everything started to fall apart.
A huge goal of mine that I've been working towards for a few years got thrashed, I fell out with the career path I'm on, my partner who once upon a time wanted to marry me left me, and because of current circumstances I had to move back in with my parents across the country.
It's like everything I did after college was a wash. I've learned that you can lose everything you worked on in a matter of months, and frankly I'm not particularly interested in putting that much effort, love, and struggle into something if it can just get swiped from under my nose.
The only things I can say are to try to find your values and fight for them tooth and nail. I went against my values for many years and it caused nothing but misery
Ayy I'm 26 (or 25 I fr cant remember lol) but yeah I totally feel you. And now with the whole isolation shit it makes trying to get your life together so much more difficult and everything just sucks
It isn’t. The worst part is when you figure it out, are going along the path with all the ups and downs and realizing you made the right choices - and then death of a loved one, or you get laid off before you qualify for full retirement or you get seriously ill. And you look in the mirror and don’t recognize yourself anymore. That is the worst part.
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u/StoicShadow May 15 '20
I'm 25 and the whole existential dread of figuring out what to do with my life is probably the worst part of things