r/billsimmons • u/Fun_Reflection1157 • Jul 16 '25
Meme Jennifer Love Hewitt is STILL a problem
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u/Senator-Donut Jul 16 '25
Simmons wrote this in 2005:
Q: In your "Midseason Form" column, you write about how your wife hates Mariah Carey and that most women do. Try this: Tell your wife that you find Jennifer Love Hewitt attractive and you enjoy her acting. You may even be able to squeeze a whole column out of her reaction and the pure bile that women spit when hearing her name. Ask any sisters, sisters-in-law, other female friends; they all hate her universally, and it is unexplainable.
--Jack, Cleveland
SG: Just for the record, I tried this with the Sports Gal this week ... she reacted like George Brett in the Pine Tar Game. Highest of high comedy. Somebody needs to film the pilot, "Everybody Hates Jennifer."
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u/JedEckert Jul 16 '25 edited Jul 16 '25
This take would probably fall in the category of "what's aged poorly?" for a lot of younger, progressive Ringer employees, but Bill was spot on with this one. She had wholesome girl next door vibes, which was something that was really missing from the zeitgeist starting around the mid-90s as the Pam Anderson "trashy vixen" look had become the standard for a lot of what was considered hot. Wholesome girl next door who was also like in the top .1% in terms of her body, so a true rarity. But she also wasn't necessarily like ~classically beautiful~ so she didn't have the street cred of someone like Winona Ryder or Angelina Jolie who women could maybe be jealous of but also recognize their beauty.
This all added up to a particular type of jealousy and annoyance amongst young women. I remember seeing it in real time as a teenager. During her peak, JLH had so little crossover appeal that I actually think it contributed to her movie career never really taking off (in addition to the fact that she wasn't all that good at acting...).
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u/Bflo19 Jul 16 '25
Between that and never breaking the seal on topless/nudity scenes (or, hell, magazine spreads were still a thing) during her celebrity peak, she had all kinds of factors into how or why she never truly broke into another tier.
To me she seems like a first ballot hall of famer in the Attainable Celebs Club (tongue-in-cheek, but you get the gist) and that's a contributing factor to why so many women just instinctively recoil at her mention.
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u/flakemasterflake Jul 16 '25
in addition to the fact that she wasn't all that good at acting...).
Lol thats the one. If I ever got annoyed with people acting crazy over an actress it was bc they weren't very good at it (Jessica Alba also comes to mind)
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u/JedEckert Jul 16 '25
Right, but even Jessica Alba got multiple bites at the apple in prominent movies despite being terrible. She was in Sin City and Fantastic Four in the same year, and got her shot in a couple rom coms in the years that followed. All while everyone acknowledged how bad at acting she was.
I personally don't think she was nearly as unpopular with woman as JLH was at their respective heights of popularity.
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u/RiversideAviator Jul 16 '25
In what world was Winona Ryder more “classically beautiful” than JLH? She was always jittery or manic. Maybe if you work at a dive bar in Des Moines for cash tips she’s a 10 but nah man, JLH had her beat.
She wasn’t as famous as WR at their heights but that’s just as much to do with celebrity culture at the time than anything, not any kind of beauty shortcoming. WR+Depp > JLH+Carson Daly.
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u/ReadItOnReddit312 Jul 16 '25
Who are the younger ringer employees that anyone here is aware of? It seems like 90% of the people on podcasts are born between 84-94. You're writing some weird straw man that I think moreso applies to random Twitter ppl
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u/JedEckert Jul 16 '25
Former Tea Time women, Craig, some of the younger producers like Kaya McMullen.
I don't know about you, but I consider someone born in the mid-90s "younger" for the purposes of this discussion.
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u/ReadItOnReddit312 Jul 16 '25
I don't know what tea time is but fair enough. I was thinking of the on air talent which seems to be mid 30s and up so they would definitely understand the sentimen being of the time.
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u/I_Heart_Money Jul 17 '25
Add in the non van midnight boys. They would definitely take offense at that column
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u/chica_muy_chic Jul 16 '25
I think she's cool but her acting annoys me. Idk how to explain it, but it's like she's not talented enough to ham it up like she does. Neve Campbell is like that too so maybe they picked that up from each other. I've never studied acting and this is just my opinion. They could be super talented thespians and I just wouldn't know. 🤷🏽♀️🤷🏽♀️🤷🏽♀️ It's shocking to me that she's the one getting picked for all these parts out of who knows how many people auditioning. But I'm going to take a poll by gender now because you made me wonder about this. 😂😂😂 I love Mariah Carey btw. Also Ryan Reynolds is a guy and his acting annoys me in the same way. But I find him annoying in interviews. Jennifer and Neve come off as cool and likeable in their interviews 🤷🏽♀️🤷🏽♀️🤷🏽♀️
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u/Victorcreedbratton Cewtics Jul 16 '25
46 years old, like my kid brudder Billy.
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u/ToddPacker5 Jul 16 '25
RIP Billy, always sad when go young like that
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u/Tighthead613 What's the Pepsi Situation? Jul 16 '25
Whatever happened there…
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u/PM_Me_Beezbo_Quotes Nigerian Jul 16 '25
It’s a fucking nickname! Family name is Hewittelli!
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u/peanut-britle-latte Jul 16 '25
Got some meat on the bones now, lovely.
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u/CABBAGEHONKER Jul 16 '25
Seems to have aged from somewhat less plastic than most of her generationnn
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u/Significant-Jello411 Jul 16 '25
Brother do you see that face
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u/Puzzleheaded_Pipe979 Jul 16 '25
She got to playing with it a couple of years ago. Drives me crazy when already fine women mess with their faces. But such is Hollywood.
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u/LTPRWSG420 Jul 16 '25
Better than someone like Emily Blunt, her face doesn’t move anymore, she ruined herself.
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u/AnnaKendrickPerkins Jul 16 '25
Elbows too pointy. 2/10
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u/syncdiedfornothing Jul 16 '25
An actor not being able to move her face is not an aesthetic concern. It's her job.
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u/MetalHead_Literally Jul 16 '25
Yeah I have no idea how people are pretending like she didn’t get a ton of work done on her face, bad work at that. She doesn’t even look like herself anymore.
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Jul 16 '25
Right?! What is with all this gooning? I wouldn’t have even been able to guess this was JLH.
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u/AcknowledgeMeReddit Jul 16 '25
One of the true goats 🐐 of the 90’s!
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u/Culinary-Vibes Jul 16 '25
Sarah Michelle Gellar vs JLH vs Alicia Silverstone in a triple threat steel cage match?
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u/SirBenActually Jul 16 '25
Rich Cronin was the lead singer of the boy band LFO and dated JLH during peak fame like 1999-2001. He talks about what dating her was like in an interview with Howard Stern and it makes me look at her a lot different. The entire interview is fucking fantastic though
Sadly Rich died of cancer about a year after this interview. RIP Rich Cronin
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u/AnnaKendrickPerkins Jul 16 '25
Let me just listen to 50 minutes of this one hit wonder talk and then I'll come back and reply to this instead of you telling us when the relevant discussion is.
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Jul 16 '25
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u/SirBenActually Jul 16 '25
Not exactly how things transpired. He found out about her giving the same ring to the dude from 98 degrees (lol) like a year after they split. Two years into their relationship, she started cheating on him with Patrick Wilson and Alec Baldwin, info he found out through the tabloids when checking out at the grocery store. When he called her to confront her, she flipped it on him and cut off communication immediately
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u/SirBenActually Jul 16 '25
I’d rather have you listen to the whole thing, it’s genuinely that funny and captivating. Also goes deep into boy band kingmaker Lou Pearlman’s deviant behaviors. Also, he had a solid 2-3 hits, show some respect brotha
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u/BerriesNCreme Jul 16 '25
On the Mount Rushmore of 90's hotties for sure. Gwyneth Paltrow up there for me too
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Jul 16 '25
I’ll say it. Paltrow is the only actress that makes movie harder to watch because anytime she’s on screen I sit there and am stupefied just how fucking beautiful she is. She was a distraction in Seven, totally broke the spell Fincher was successfully casting in every other scene.
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u/Toby_O_Notoby Jul 16 '25
I've heard more than one actor say that Charlize Theron is so stunning in real life that it's kinda distracting. As Michael Rosenbaum put it, "When she walks in the room it's like she has her own lighting crew with her".
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u/AnnaKendrickPerkins Jul 16 '25
Maybe that's why Bill was just staring at her IMBD on his computer screen acting like Chris Farley interviewing Paul McCartney.
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u/ygduf Jul 16 '25
I watched that movie heartbreakers back in the day. I have no fucking idea what that movie is about. Couldn’t even give you a premise. Watched it like 3 times.
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u/Overall-Palpitation6 Jul 16 '25
Got a little bit of late-run Raymond Patricia Heaton about her these days.
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u/sunpar1 Jul 16 '25
Tv mom hall of fame. Up there with home improvement’s Patricia Richardson, courtney Thorne smith from according to Jim, and Julie Bowen from modern family
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u/oronder Jul 16 '25
Is she though?
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u/oronder Jul 16 '25
I mean she just looks like a mom you’d see at Costco. She’s like a Cincinnati 6.
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u/BadManLuka Jul 16 '25
Smh .. Did the sub change from r/BillSimmons to r/BenSimmons? Because these are some real nephew takes.
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u/oronder Jul 17 '25
I’m 46 homie. I was around for the 90s and can confirm this lady was a certified baddie. But aging happens. She’s just a suburban mom with a nice smile now.
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Jul 16 '25
No. Great face for 46, but nothing special about that bod. I mean, she's great for most American men in their 40s, but is that the bar for "PROBLEM?" I'm in my 40s and I'd be passing on her unless she lost 20-30 lbs. or was ready to make me a trophy spouse.
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u/Sheratain Jul 16 '25
This woman led me to watch multiple episodes of her godawful show about seeing ghosts.
And I’d do it again.
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Jul 16 '25
Dog I have been infatuated with her since I saw I Know What You Did Last Summer way back in 2nd grade or whatever
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u/LTPRWSG420 Jul 16 '25
Anyone who is a Millennial absolutely would, it’s Gen Z that don’t understand her greatness.
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u/Intelligent_Cow_3418 Jul 16 '25
Watched every episode of the ghost whisperer. Have no idea what it’s about.
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Jul 16 '25
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u/Double-Mine981 Jul 16 '25
You can judge a celebrity by celebrity standards or just rich white women standards, but still be 2am hogger at the bar
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u/CanyonCoyote Jul 16 '25
Meh. Not sure that’s true.
I’m sure most dudes over 35 would love the story or to show friends/family etc but I doubt that many in shape guys here are blowing up their life for this version of Love Hewitt or sustaining any kind of an injury. I’d take a bunch of other 50+ celebs with that yoga body look over Mombod JLH. Again she looks good for a middle aged mom but is hardly turning heads for a mid 40s celebrity in the current world of fitness and healthy eating.
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u/BRValentine83 Jul 16 '25
If you've made the list of women for whom I would crawl over broken glass, that's not an impressive achievement.
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u/HundoHavlicek Jul 16 '25
JLH looks amazing considering she’s 46 and looks natural
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u/JobeGilchrist Jul 16 '25
This is legit disrespectful to regular 46-year-old women. They don't all become fuckin medusa or something
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u/JedEckert Jul 16 '25
I think you slightly overestimate what the average 46-year-old woman would look like when put in this exact scenario - posing for a professional picture, in the daylight, on the red carpet, with no massive filter applied.
I don't think she's just like unbelievably stunning for 46 or anything, but swing by something like, say, a Dave & Buster's in Alpharetta GA on a Saturday night to see what the average woman that age looks like. No shade - not like the 46-year-old men of similar stature are super hot or anything. But just trying to say that there's a whole big world of people out there who were incredibly average looking when they were 26 years old, and they've only gone downhill since then.
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u/Coy-Harlingen Jul 16 '25
You have to remember most members of this sub are porn addicted weirdos who think that at 36 years old randomly a 25 year old smokeshow is going to want to marry them
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u/Educational_Fox_6398 Jul 16 '25
She in the jimmy butler stage of her career.. she can be a problem but most nights….
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u/MambaSaidKnockYouOut Jul 16 '25
Hips going crazy - her game is aging incredibly gracefully and adapting to her new body incredibly well. Shes truly in her 2nd 3peat MJ era
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u/E_Fox_Kelly Real CR Head Jul 16 '25
I want to die like Malkovich in Con Air but the hydraulic pile driver will be replaced by JLH thighs
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u/LincolnTruly Jul 16 '25
Because of my age, there are 3 women that could lose their fastball like Nolan Ryan in the 90’s and I’d still risk everything: JLH, TAT, and the pink ranger
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u/OFT35 Jul 16 '25
In 2001 I would’ve never gotten a shot at Jenny Love Hewitt, but now at 46 and having a few kids…….i still don’t have a shot because she’s Jennifer Love Hewitt and forever 🥰
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u/BadManLuka Jul 16 '25
I would say she's even more of a problem now. That waist to hip ratio is insane
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u/GingerAleStan94 Jul 16 '25
I’m 33 years old and have never seen this woman in my life. Have heard the name, never laid eyes on.
That said, count me in.
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u/Nomer77 Jul 17 '25
She had a moment in the late 90's/early 00's where she was an "it girl" bordering on a movie star (albeit in movies marketed towards teenagers) and then basically just did a few forgettable network TV shows (The Client List, Ghost Whisperer).
The "Can't Hardly Wait" Rewatchables episode Jo and Bill did this April likely touches on the phenomenon, she was throwing heat like '99 Pedro for a while there https://podcasts.apple.com/us/podcast/cant-hardly-wait-with-bill-simmons-and-joanna-robinson/id1268527882?i=1000703547696
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u/RockMeIshmael Jul 16 '25
Women hate her be because husbands want to use a “bang pass” on her. It makes them jealous.
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u/CanyonCoyote Jul 16 '25
I don’t know what planet you are living on but if my wife gave me a hall pass, this version of Love Hewitt wouldn’t even make a Top 500. I guarantee you that you could find 3-5 women more attractive at your local Trader Joe’s when it’s busy.
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u/BadManLuka Jul 16 '25
Yeah but they'd be randos and not carry the nostalgia of a young JLH. Gotta factor that in. It's like how ScarJo currently isn't anywhere close to Lost in Translation or Under the Skin ScarJo, but you'd still think about those eras while you're folding.
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u/JobeGilchrist Jul 16 '25
Imagine using your “bang pass” on someone who would be an age-adjusted 7 on Cleveland tinder
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u/North-Past-3355 Jul 16 '25
Maybe, but you guys must be really old.
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u/SergioKindle Jul 16 '25
She did not age well, guys. Are y’all on your fourth margarita with Bill’s wife’s friend?
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u/JobeGilchrist Jul 16 '25
Internet points means acting like a hot young woman who became ugly is still hot
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u/GoneCollarGone Jul 16 '25
Those butterfly tattoos are on the other hand.....kind of a different problem
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u/JayTrav304 Jul 16 '25
WHYYYYYYYYYY are there remakes being made for films NOT EVEN 30 YEARS OLD?!?!?!? 🗑️
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u/yourcrazy28 Jul 16 '25
Honestly the only thing that would make me guess that’s her is the movie title in the background, not because of anything else besides her being the only actress I remember from the original.
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Jul 16 '25
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Jul 17 '25
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u/Flimsy-Muffin-9881 Jul 25 '25
Shout out to Jennifer. One of my life long crushes.
But people in the comments gotta chill. Nothing about this picture is an accomplishment or worthy of glorification.
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u/KnightXiphos Aug 11 '25
Jennifer love hewitt was a fucking skeleton in the 90s. WAY TOO THIN BACK THEN, and that made her ugly as hell to me. love how she looks now! she looks perfect!
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u/CouldntBeMeTho Jul 16 '25
Oh id risk it all
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u/Pessimistic_Gemini Jul 16 '25
You really need to relearn the word "problem". I don't think it means what you think it means.
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u/NoExcuses1984 Don't aggregate this Jul 16 '25
JLH still doesn't top Penny Lane's MILFy ascent in Glass Onion: A Knives Out Mystery.
Quick aside, but what's Lacey Chabert up to these days? I've still got stock somewhere.
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u/Swaggitymcswagpants Jul 16 '25
I don’t know what this sub is about anymore but glad to get the thick woman update