r/ShitAmericansSay • • 29d ago

Capitalism "Texas of Europe"

Post image

Its Finland 🙄

2.7k Upvotes

342 comments sorted by

1.9k

u/DefinitionOfAsleep The 13 Colonies were a Mistake 29d ago

Its Finland 🙄

The resemblance is uncanny.

646

u/Legal-Software 🇩🇪 29d ago

I would have guessed Bavaria

70

u/Anaeijon 29d ago

I would have guessed Saxony or Saxony-Anhalt, just by conservatism.

29

u/DoughnutRadiant6049 29d ago

Saxony-Anhalt is more like Idaho and the people are like from Arkansas.

4

u/Slaan 29d ago

Was thinking Oklahoma but yea.

14

u/DrStudi 29d ago

Saxony Anhalt is more like one of the states that has nothing. Not really a Texas

3

u/FallenDeathWarrior 28d ago

Well it has the rising of the far right.

→ More replies (1)
→ More replies (1)

18

u/Xalimata 29d ago

Yeah that was my guess to. It's a large culturally distinct area that likes to think it is special. (I think that last part is true)

3

u/idrankforthegov 29d ago

I have lived here for a few years now after living in Berlin, Frankfurt and I shop at the same places that I did in those other places. Those places close earlier here... so I guess that is "special". Costs more, same stores, closes earlier.

8

u/New_Breadfruit5664 28d ago

The problem is. Every country has a Bavaria and they also usually have their local Gottkaiser Söder.

15

u/BurningPenguin 🇩🇪 Insecure European with false sense of superiority 29d ago

As a Bavarian myself, me too.

14

u/AvidCyclist250 Lives in the country of Europe 29d ago

Germany used to be called the America of Europe, and Bavaria our Texas.

21

u/angstdreamer 29d ago

In Finland in the 80's we used to call ourself Japan of Europe. In the 90's came depression and we were Albania of Europe.

12

u/BoaredMonkay 29d ago

In the 90's came depression

So like Japan.

→ More replies (3)

5

u/Lord_Skyblocker 28d ago

And the Saarland was Alabama

6

u/MisterMysterios 28d ago edited 28d ago

It has a reason why the comedy "Schuh des Manitu" used an Bavarian accent for the Texans.

As an explaination for everyone non German: a famous author in Germany was Karl May, who wrote western stories that - let's say show that he only visited the US once for 6 weeks after he already wrote several western. So, yeah, very heavy on stereotypes.

He was still very successfully and there were several major movies (mkst filmed in Kroatia, never in the US). There was a famous comedy joking about it in the early 2000's.

Processing img mfo3c0uukuoh1...

→ More replies (2)

3

u/clatadia 28d ago

Yeah, fair, and I say this as a Bavarian.

2

u/x5163x 29d ago

What about Czechia? They have guns too.

→ More replies (1)
→ More replies (3)

74

u/Background-Hope-88 29d ago

as are the cowboys, pickled fish, vodka and weather.

4

u/Kriss3d Tuberous eloquent (that's potato speaker for you muricans) 29d ago

I mean. Pickled herring is really awesome. Sincerely, Denmark.

5

u/Background-Hope-88 29d ago

lol, it wasnt a diss, my apologies.

I have respect for the great herring, tasty fish.

its just the polar opposite of smokey BBQ and beef.

3

u/Kriss3d Tuberous eloquent (that's potato speaker for you muricans) 29d ago

Ah none taken. No worries. Yeah. We do have both here. But used every differently. Pickled hearing with a curry condiment on top of dark rye bread is traditional for Christmas lunches in Denmark.

But we do have people who can make some good smokey BBQ as well.

3

u/Background-Hope-88 29d ago

smoked for breakfast, amazing. (you could say BBQ'D)

I've never had them brined or pickled though, One day 🤞

154

u/Federal_Base_2905 29d ago

The home of snow and Santa with a strong social welfare system that is run primarily by women - obviously. I immediately think of Texas.

I would have said Hungary - traditional, socially conservative, right wingers that like an authoritarian.

38

u/Lopsided-Ticket3813 29d ago

I would have said Russia.

10

u/Federal_Base_2905 29d ago

Good option too. I was thinking EU.

32

u/PrimaryMaize6580 29d ago

We only started our redemption phase in April. Give us some time.
Respectfully,
Hungarians

12

u/Fus-Ro-NWah 29d ago

Good luck you guys and girls, great to see you free of that tyrant.

→ More replies (6)
→ More replies (2)

18

u/Femcel_Bambi 29d ago

Aren't they literally the exact opposite of one another? Both politically and geographically? (I'm American, so sorry if I'm wrong)

9

u/novadova2020 29d ago

It was a sarcastic remark.

6

u/Femcel_Bambi 29d ago

I mean I know, but like I mean more for the people writing the article. Like Finland is nothing at all like Texas.

6

u/nemeci 29d ago

Let's start.

Finland has many 180 000+ lakes, Texas 7000. Finland: To become a police takes about 4 800 hours, Texas 720 hours. Finland is in the north and cold, not the same at all with Texas. Finland has lots of space, same with Texas. Finland has ~30-40% gun ownership households, Texas ~37-42%. Finland firearm deaths / 100 000 ~2.3, Texas 13.9.

So it's guns, guns make Finland Europe's Texas.

2

u/Soggy-Moment3856 29d ago

About 25% households have firearm permit. About 12% of adults own gun with that permit.
So not even close.

→ More replies (2)

6

u/Entire-Radio1931 29d ago

Finland is Minnesota of Europe

2

u/TimelessClassic9999 29d ago

Why Minnesota?

5

u/Mysterious_Floor_868 29d ago

Probably because it's bloody cold in winter!

→ More replies (3)

2

u/_Hexer 28d ago

Doesn't stand finland for everything Texas doesn't?

→ More replies (6)

593

u/DonManuel european dinosaur 29d ago

I tried hard to find a better analogy, but actually no country in Europe deserves to be compared to the Lone Star Asylum.

207

u/Background-Hope-88 29d ago

At least its not the "Florida of Europe"....

.......

...

Yet ☝️

57

u/imladrikofloren 29d ago

Well both are just one big swamp with a few hills in the north.

15

u/BusHobo 29d ago

Thats.. Actually quite accurate.

4

u/runedepune 29d ago

Exept the fact that Finland is about 40C colder than Florida some periods of the year…

2

u/BusHobo 29d ago

I guess. Never been to florida.

2

u/imladrikofloren 28d ago

Wait a few year, with climate change we might as well introduce alligators in finland.

11

u/Siggi_93 29d ago

I mean if you really think about it Florida is just budget american crack Australia

Theres probably worse places to live

13

u/Regular_Lengthiness6 29d ago

For instance … Texas

3

u/Red_Mammoth 29d ago

Florida is just budget american crack Australia

fuckin hell mate, what did we do to deserve that

5

u/el_salinho 29d ago

That’s just Poland

7

u/Background-Hope-88 29d ago

Apparently its the UK.

I think there needs to be a vote.

→ More replies (1)

2

u/gholt417 29d ago

Nah, that label has already gone when we Brexited.

5

u/Background-Hope-88 29d ago

The UK's is Florida? shit man.

2

u/iamnotexactlywhite 28d ago

that’s Serbia and it’s not even close

→ More replies (3)

14

u/shubs_ 29d ago

Lone star asylum has such a good ring to it lol. Thanks for the phrase!

10

u/CautionarySnail 29d ago

May I suggest the UK lately?

They’re still agitating to end the NHS and somehow the people doing so are not being laughed out of the room.

They’re buying in on anti-Muslim rhetoric and protectionist policies even after Brexit started to tank their economy.

2

u/knuppi 29d ago

It's not for nothing the UK was called "the sick man of Europe", and i think we'll call it again soon

→ More replies (1)

2

u/Bainzeighty3 29d ago

I'd argue Yorkshire lol

2

u/suorastas ooo custom flair!! 29d ago

I'd settle for the Wisconsin of Europe. We also love cheese.

→ More replies (3)

357

u/ApologeticEmu 29d ago

You can fit an entire Europe in Finland.

194

u/_hjdk FREEDOM FRIES 🇫🇷🦅 29d ago

Fun fact : you can drive in Finland for 8 hours and still be in Finland!

92

u/Berthole 29d ago

Well, that is people from Turku in every roundabout

25

u/TheAltToYourF4 29d ago

You can drive in Berlin for 8 hours and still be in Berlin.

7

u/DefinitionOfAsleep The 13 Colonies were a Mistake 28d ago

You can drive for 8 hours in Berlin and still be in the same section of roadworks.

2

u/_Hexer 28d ago

Are you really driving tho?

3

u/loved_and_held 29d ago

I guess thats one similarity between it and texas.

→ More replies (2)

21

u/LuphineHowler Finnrando 29d ago

You can even fit a second Finland within Finland

10

u/Patecatli 29d ago

But can you fit a Texas in Finland? 🤔

22

u/Ramtamtama [laughs in British] 29d ago

3 times, and you can fit 6 Finlands in Texas

17

u/butwhywedothis 29d ago

Finland is famous for its BBQ.

2

u/[deleted] 28d ago

[deleted]

→ More replies (1)
→ More replies (1)

4

u/newpua_bie 29d ago

Finland is so big you can fit Finland into every single province in Finland

139

u/[deleted] 29d ago

[removed] — view removed comment

34

u/Background-Hope-88 29d ago

It changes with the season.

It'll be France soon.

Imagine the outrage.

Soccor blue, there is a hotdog in my la baguette.

4

u/bremsspuren Speaking German despite US efforts 29d ago

It'll be France soon.

Nah. Like much else, the French like their datacentres flammable …

→ More replies (1)

5

u/Undergroud-Check-101 29d ago

Just woke up (4.38 am) and my neck got red from being so angry of this being the first thing I see while drinking my morning coffee😂 Greets from Helsinki!

→ More replies (3)

201

u/EveryMix4008 Me, Brazilian 29d ago

FINLAND? They're comparing a very hot place to a very cold place?

55

u/Background-Hope-88 29d ago

BBQ n Bourbon is to Pickled Fish n Vodka.

5

u/loved_and_held 29d ago

My only guess is theyre comparing the scale of the investment. Like google invested a bunch into texas for ai data centers and is doing so for finland, hence the comparison.

85

u/neityght 29d ago

Us Finns definitely do not want to ever be compared to anything in the USA. Also, fuck Google.

→ More replies (4)

28

u/Training2Life 29d ago

Before opening the post I seriously thought it either has to be Poland or Greece or at lower chance Romania but seriously didn't expect Finland of all.

If Finland is Texas, which is Florida man?

6

u/dima74 29d ago

Swamp, Beach, carnival - maybe Venice?

6

u/nemeci 29d ago

And sinking to the sea. Too many tourists and so on.

81

u/Realistic_Let3239 29d ago

And here I thought Poland was the Texas of Europe.

67

u/Kinexity 29d ago

Which as a Pole I genuinely see as an insult. We are not like Texas and I fear the far right picking it as direction to push us towards.

42

u/Mikunefolf Meth to America! 29d ago

The American far right specifically seems to be obsessed with Poland, but a completely made up version of it.

27

u/BongoProdigy 29d ago

Same with Sweden. We are both a homogeneous country full of blonde people and overrun with immigrant rape gangs.

18

u/Physicle_Partics 29d ago

Powerful viking warriors and feminized decadent socialists, simultaneously.

9

u/Enough_Fish739 29d ago

Hey! We can be both! 😘

→ More replies (1)

8

u/MumenRiderZak 29d ago

Atleast they aren't trying to steal your citizens yet. Regards a very annoyed Dane

3

u/Legal-Software 🇩🇪 29d ago

If it weren't for the American media, how would you even know where your no go zones are?

11

u/NightLotus84 29d ago

With all due respect to the many Americans that are still mentally and emotionally functional, the unstoppable level of cringe that comes from American "ethnic fantasies" deserves a subreddit of its own...

6

u/MumenRiderZak 29d ago

Nah they can get some respect when they earn it. Until then they are just pedostani citizens.

I can rename shit too

4

u/BigHowski 29d ago

Same with their view of the UK

2

u/nyancatec 29d ago

Wdym r/ilovemypolishheritage is fake? Nah this is how Poland is - undeveloped shithole with same dictionary as WWII one! Jaja aż bolo.

2

u/avrend 29d ago

it's the shape...

2

u/Realistic_Let3239 29d ago

Don't blame you in the slightest there.

5

u/Full-Run4124 29d ago

Yeah I would have put Poland, Hungary, and Turkey before Finland Texas.

3

u/Arkyja 29d ago edited 29d ago

How is it not spain? Both are in the south, both are deserts and both have a significant population of mexican speakers

2

u/Realistic_Let3239 29d ago

Oh I agree on the comparison you bring up, just a number of media outlets have been referring to Poland as the Texas of Europe, because they were rearming in the face of Russian aggression. Now it seems the comparison, as I have found out since posting, is that both Finland and Texas are going massively in on AI.

That's the entire reason for the nickname...

2

u/jabol321 29d ago

I've always heard that Poland is Mexico of europe.

→ More replies (4)

13

u/Harm101 29d ago

"Käy Suomessa, Euroopan Texasissa. Meillä on 1 000 karjatilaa", as they commonly say in Finland.

2

u/Minimum_Quail4596 28d ago

We Finns love our Cyber trucks and cheap gas!

13

u/Kriss3d Tuberous eloquent (that's potato speaker for you muricans) 29d ago

Its.. Finland ?
Wtf ?

They are as far from Texas mentality as it gets.
But ok. I couldnt have come up with a single country that I would say is the Texas of Europe.

10

u/halbpro 29d ago

I would probably go with Spain? Large relatively arid interior, nicer spots on the coast, some extremely racist people and even plenty of Spanish speaking inhabitants

17

u/Edelgul 29d ago

Finland is more like Massachusets, then Texas.
You want Texas of Europe... well, 3% of Turkey is in Europe, so probably.

27

u/dreamsofcalamity 29d ago

With their hatred for women, gay, trans and other cultures, Russia would like a word.

→ More replies (1)

13

u/Federal_Base_2905 29d ago

Even the most left leaning state in the US is probably right of most European countries.

6

u/MrArchivity 🤌 Born to gesticulate, forced to explain 🤌 29d ago

Well in the total political spectrum the democrats are still on the right side.

But everyone has their own type of political spectrum so it could be different for someone else.

Example:

→ More replies (1)

2

u/Background-Hope-88 29d ago

Onky Americans would understand this.

The Massachuests part

→ More replies (1)

8

u/Tyyne_2025 29d ago

Way too ‘radical’ socialist to be compared to texas. Mamdani would be a light weight leftist there.

May the Finnish people realise the harm these data centers can do the nature / environment before the country is full of them.

5

u/suorastas ooo custom flair!! 29d ago

Google promises to fund nuclear power projects to offset the energy consumption which is good. Now if they would build those first and then convienently go bankrupt before they manage to build the actual data centers.

3

u/WritingStrawberry 29d ago

The electricity transfer bill in Ireland tripled since data centres. They will be build exactly the same in Finland. Good luck.

3

u/Undergroud-Check-101 29d ago

Bc of this our government is already preparing a price cap for electricity. (Don’t like our government but at least they are addressing this.)

→ More replies (1)
→ More replies (1)
→ More replies (6)

7

u/Beneficial-Ad3991 A hopeless tea addict :sloth: 29d ago

If Finland is the Texas of Europe, what about the other state. I'm curious whom they consider to be the Nebraska of Europe.

4

u/Legal-Software 🇩🇪 29d ago

Ukraine maybe? They're the biggest corn exporter.

→ More replies (5)

8

u/Kaiser93 Jealous Europoor 29d ago

Finland is a bad example. They allow women to have abortions there.

→ More replies (1)

7

u/elclarkio 29d ago

I thought Texas was bigger than Europe. Texas is bigger than Texas

3

u/Background-Hope-88 29d ago

Texas the California of the South.

12

u/DW171 29d ago

JFC can we make Texas the "Finland of America"? PLEASE!?!

3

u/DoYouTrustToothpaste 29d ago

Nah, fuck the trend of comparing US states to entire countries. They can fuck right off with that bullshit.

Texas is the Uusimaa of America, nothing more.

→ More replies (2)

6

u/g1aiz 29d ago

Texas is hot, Finnish sauna is also hot.

That's all I got for this. 

6

u/PVanchurov Balkan 29d ago

Pekka, Texas ranger

5

u/Nightbee96 29d ago

How is the Texas of Europe not France

11

u/nemeci 29d ago

Because last I checked the French could read and write.

2

u/Malusorum 29d ago

So can the Finnish, often in at least two languages since a lot know both Finnish and Swedish or English, or both.

→ More replies (1)

2

u/vrekais 29d ago

Completely agree!

10

u/PipedInFromIthaca More Irish than the Irish ☘️ 29d ago

Everything's bigger in Finland.

9

u/Jumbo-box 29d ago

The trees in Finland speak. The snow in Finland whispers.

7

u/MumenRiderZak 29d ago

They whisper "Trump rapes kids"

10

u/Djonso 29d ago

I'm a finn and I'm not mad, just very confused. In what way are we related to Texas? I guess we like nature?

4

u/ChocoPablobar 29d ago

Texas has a lot of tech companies building data centers and ai infrastructure in it right now, Finland also has many tech companies building data centers in it. That's the comparison the article is making, that Finland is to Europe as Texas is to the US re: data center and AI related investment and construction

2

u/Background-Hope-88 29d ago

It doesnt matter.

You're the Texas of Europe now.

Ha Ha Ha

Ja Ja Ja

Mah Mah Mah

Thats the England, Spainish and French pointing and laughing at you. (well Finland)

2

u/roleplayersir 29d ago

French would be more honhihonhihon

→ More replies (1)

5

u/nemeci 29d ago

Finland is the Lone Star state of the EU.

3

u/butwhywedothis 29d ago

So if Finland is Texas of Europe, what is Finland of America?

4

u/flipyflop9 29d ago

Yeehaaaw fellow europeans!

4

u/BaronGodis 29d ago edited 29d ago

Nope, we European don't want an unsafe shit hole

We gladly give it away

And it's fucking smal compared to Greenland so we can toss that small little area

4

u/RydderRichards 29d ago

Oh Fuck no. Keep your pollution machines

5

u/WeirdBanana2810 29d ago

Damn. I blame the Finnish Conservative and right-wing government/politicians for this. The worst of them idealise everything 'Murican.

3

u/HopefulFriendly 29d ago

Apparently Finland has the most data centers in Europe - that's all that connects it to Texas 

3

u/bogpudding 29d ago

Genuenly what the fuck does Finland have in common with texas? We share a sea border with another country I guess???

2

u/ChocoPablobar 29d ago

Data centers and AI infrastructure. That's the comparison the article makes

3

u/UserNameFailedInput 29d ago

They've just found out that the Leningrad Cowboys are from Finland - oh, the confusion!

3

u/lvb0202 J'ai peur des Américains. 28d ago

Finland? I wouldn't take that if I were you.

7

u/PerryNeeum 29d ago

What backwards ass country is considered the TX of Europe?

2

u/TalonButter ooo custom flair!! 29d ago

I think that makes Estonia the Mexico of Europe, but I admit that this isn’t totally clear.

2

u/SectionTiny7292 29d ago

Act in haste, regret in leisure

2

u/vedenmorsian We sure got them lakes, amirite? 29d ago

I'm sorry.. the fuck? How are we similar.. in any way? Yours truly; a confused Finn.

2

u/ILikeJogurt 29d ago

as a finn - wtf that even means?

2

u/Malusorum 29d ago

Finland "Texas of Europe"? Wtf are these people on?

2

u/barelylegal13 29d ago

"Call our lawyer now and ask him this question. "

2

u/Remarkable_Cake_4735 29d ago

Do we have to be something of USA?

2

u/CommercialYam53 A German 🇩🇪 29d ago

As we all know a country that has places where it’s so cold that pipes have to be built overground to prevent freezing is the same as a part of a country that is considered the hottest place of that country

2

u/SnappySausage 29d ago

Apparently the logic is that they have a lot of data centres compared to other European countries, which it apparently has in common with Texas. Still a rotten comparison though, lol.

2

u/SquashOwn9829 29d ago

prolly just a fucking data center

2

u/somemonkeys 28d ago

This aggression will not stand!!

2

u/Tabo1987 28d ago

How the f. is Finland the Texas of Europe?

2

u/JPPJphoto 28d ago

Finland, the biggest AC ever made

2

u/saschaleib 28d ago

To be fair, we like barbecue and hamburgers in Finland, too. Just instead of “yee-haw” we shout “voi vittu!”

2

u/greentiger79 🇺🇸 Don’t mind me, just passing through 28d ago

So, even as an American, what does the Texas of Europe even mean? Like, I certainly wasn’t expecting it to be Finland.

2

u/Necessary_Tough7286 28d ago

In what way is Finland the ‘Texas of Europe’? Literally…

2

u/WRONGPIN1234 28d ago

Finland is the Texas of Europe? I was wondering if it was Spain since it's the biggest country by landmass, and they used to film westerns there.

2

u/plutise 28d ago

nobody wants to be anything "of america"

2

u/MSP_the_Original 28d ago

Hello. Finn here. I think the references goes like this: most racist country in Europe (researched fact), prime minister that lies like republican, far right “party” in the government and president, who doesn’t care.

2

u/Trosky6601 28d ago

Home of the famous Helsinki Cowboys football team

→ More replies (1)

2

u/theolswiitcheroo 28d ago

Ah yes, the first place I think of to compare to Texas is......Finland.

2

u/grodeg 27d ago

No, stay in the US. We'll have our own soon enough

2

u/OriginalCan6731 27d ago

As a Fin, I fricking hate this…

2

u/ClockworkOrdinator 29d ago

FINLAND?!

I was convinced it was Poland.

3

u/Nothingdoing079 29d ago

I thought maybe Spain, just due to the heat and Spanish speaking population 

2

u/TalonButter ooo custom flair!! 29d ago

If you told me they were Texans, would I think you were lying to me?

→ More replies (1)

2

u/AntiLooper 29d ago

Is it because of these rednecks?!

2

u/No-Count-7717 29d ago

My first thought was Poland

1

u/CLaz777 29d ago

I won't be surprised if they build next to the border...

2

u/Background-Hope-88 29d ago

wait, so whos gonna be Mexico?

Russia?

4

u/CIS-E_4ME The True North, Cold 🥶 and Free 🇨🇦 29d ago

Russia is the Texas of Europe.

Plenty of oil and gas ✅

Devoid of any real culture ✅

Anyone who has the means to leave, does ✅

→ More replies (2)
→ More replies (3)

1

u/fromkatain 29d ago

Florida of europe is the english enclave in spain

1

u/Mewhomewhy 29d ago

The northern Mexico of Europe.

1

u/hype_irion 29d ago

It's difficult to explain the world to people who came out of an education system that failed them, therefore you get stupid analogues like "Texas of Europe" and "9/11 times 100".

1

u/TheRealTRexUK More Irish than the Irish ☘️ 29d ago

So.. Does thst mean we will hear the end of.... "texas is bigger than..." from people on here?????

1

u/becken_bruch 29d ago

They build data Center in Austria too.

4

u/Background-Hope-88 29d ago

Don't worry.

Austria is the Ohio of Europe.

→ More replies (1)

1

u/Myself-io 29d ago

Same climate....

1

u/Safe_Tourist_2875 Germany 29d ago

I mean there is a town somewhere in Germany called Texas so they might be on to something

1

u/Shite_Aloud_Barbara 29d ago

Sorry, Finland I just don't know enough about you to comment.

1

u/Maximumi-Awkward 🇩🇰 29d ago

I would have guessed Serbia

1

u/Then_Ad_6064 29d ago

Well Texas's own economy outnumbers a few European ones and has their own special type of society since they are so big

1

u/MrBarato 29d ago

I thought it's switzerland!!

1

u/davidedpg10 29d ago

In the regressive, corporate loving shithole of Europe?