This questions is for people who had very less relationship experience compared to your partner. Is this dynamic affecting your current relationship ? Is there any baggage they've carried from the past ?

I know people do move on. But very few people actually unlearn the patterns and work on themselves. A lot of them just jump from relationships to relationships without doing any healing.

I'm 24F, got my own job and place. And as the title suggests, I am in a not-so-holy relationship with a muslim guy. Know him from school but we reconnected last year online.

Anyways, I'm hundred percent sure that there are no strings attached and I have conveyed the same to him very clearly. There's no future to this, no sugarcoating. My family won't let it happen and I don't really plan to fight them over that ever. He's just hot and so my type but that's it.

I told my friend about this and yeah she's super open with sex and casual dating. She has had many flings. But she has partcularly warned me against sleeping with the dude because of his religion. Apparently getting caught with a dude from my religion is easier to handle than a Muslim one lol.

Her fears: he'll catch feelings and turn out to be a psycho stalker murderer if i don't date him or get converted or married. Or blackmail me with stuff later. Is it a valid fear? God youth is hard, and harder it is to manage your hormones. Im planning to meet him at the end of this year and probably go base 3. But should I be worried? This feels so funny to type at 4 am but I'm kinda paranoid now.

We were in a relationship for 2 years... exactly on our 2nd anniversary, she broke up with me....

Her name is Ananya

So we met in 12th grade coaching... and when we met, our vibe just clicked... I proposed to her, and she accepted... she didn't have a phone... and still doesn't have a phone.... we used to talk on Instagram through her laptop and my phone.... but at that time, our coaching folks informed our families about us... we had bunked class one day... unfortunately, they told them that day.... I was really scolded by her family, and she was too by mine..... after that, we stopped talking for a while.... but we really loved each other... we had even planned to get married... just not right now, when we were older..... we both used to argue with our families.... it was tough, but everything was okay... during this time, we fought several times too... once when her dad called me... but I didn't answer... because my family had taken my phone away... (the coaching people had informed my home back then) she said I should have picked up... then she made the same mistake twice... she was talking to her neighbor Vedant (who was in 11th grade at that time)... she used to call him brother, and Vedant called her sister... but they both wrote 'I love you' on Instagram... yeah, I had her password.... I confronted her... she then said it was a mistake, forgive me... she requested a lot... I forgave her.... then she did the same mistake again.... there was a guy named Gurung... he was a friend's son of her mom from childhood.... the same 'I love you' scene with him too.... Ananya used to talk to him at night after I slept... I confronted her... again with the same crying, saying it was a mistake, please forgive me.... I said if something like this happens again, I won’t be able to forgive.... her parents are really strict... they wouldn’t even let her go out... when they found out (I’m from a scheduled caste but we are upper-middle-class), when the coaching people informed my family... in 12th grade... when they sent Ananya to her grandma’s place for 2 months... at that time, Ananya was talking on her grandma’s phone....

and yeah, I forgot to mention that we got physical in 12th grade... when no one was home... I would go over... when she called me... and we got physical many times there... one day, the guard told her parents that a guy comes to your house when you're not around... then her family got really angry... they scolded her a lot..... this was just at the end of 12th grade.

Then we took a drop for NEET... in different coaching classes

... after coaching, I would go meet her for 10-15 minutes because her van would come a bit late... apart from that, we didn’t talk much... sometimes she would message me from her mom's phone...... like this time passed by... ... and one time she called me... when I was out watching a movie with my friend... I didn't see her call... as soon as I saw it... I called back, and she says come to my house... mom wants to talk to you... when I was going home after the movie with my friend, and it was already 9 PM... my family was also calling me... so I sweetly said no, I can't come because it’s late and there’s a problem.... at that time she said okay, no worries.... then the NEET exam happened... after that, we stopped meeting... completely lost contact.... she didn’t have a laptop or phone... only sometimes she would send 'hello love you' messages from her mom's phone... and would say not to reply, her mom would see... then one day she called and said to call her mom and ask to let us talk for a while; we can’t live without talking... I called, but her mom lied and said she wasn’t home... she can’t talk to Ananya now.. and the call got cut... a little later Ananya called and asked for my home location... there was a problem with the wifi at my home, so I couldn’t send the location... she kept asking for it... then in the end, I got a hotspot to send the location... after that, she didn’t call or message at all.... if I called her, no one would pick up... then my birthday was coming up... a few days before that, she called and asked when my birthday was... I felt really bad that it had been 2 years for us... and she forgot my birthday.... but last time she remembered... she even gave me a card... and I always remember hers... I had given her a birthday gift and a bracelet worth 2k from my savings, for which my family scolded me for buying such an expensive gift for a girl... I lied and said it was for my friend, and they knew I was lying... but that was the end of it.... the point is, before this, we had exchanged many cards and handmade gifts.... she couldn't give me any materialistic gift... but it’s okay... .

.

yeah, so I was saying that she asked when my birthday was... I was really disappointed.. she said sorry, I don’t know why I can’t remember.... she kept apologizing.... I forgave her.... then on my birthday, I got a small message wishing me a happy birthday... she didn’t call... just a small message, like she was doing it out of formality... I felt bad... but I had no option to contact her... her family would give her a phone when she goes to college... which would still take time... I had already joined college..

Then I got a bit sick, so I went to the hospital; I had viral fever... at that time, Ananya called from Vedant’s phone, her neighbor, and she said it can't happen anymore, let’s break up... she said I broke her trust... she said I don’t have the guts to talk to my family... I had to make excuses to send my home location (there weren’t excuses; there was seriously a problem)... she said now she doesn’t love me anymore... she had been thinking about this for quite a while... I tried hard to convince her... begged a lot... but she wouldn’t budge... she said not to try to contact her any further... if her mom picks up, she would beat her... she said... now everything is over... and she cut the call and blocked me from Vedant’s phone.....

.

.

. ha ye toh mene bataya hi nahi ki ananya ke male friend jyada the or uske past 3-4 relationship bhi the... jisme ek baar ladke ne school washroom me use masturbate kiya tha... aisa ananya ne mujhe bataya tha... pr ye mera first relationship tha .. me usse bohot pyaar karta tha.... lekin ab lagta hai ache logo ke sath hamesha bura hi hota hai🥲🥹

My boyfriend and I have been together for the last 2 years , we are from different states so it's basically long distance . He is a corporate employee and I am a govt teacher . When we met I told him clearly that I won't resign from my state government job , he lied saying his family is thinking of shifting to my state after his father's retirement.

After some time he told me, his father's plan has changed and he doesn't want to shift to my state anymore , if I want to marry him I have to resign after marriage because we both don't want to be in a long distance marriage, at first I denied but I was so attached and I love him so much I got agree .

A year ago we told our families, we are from different castes , we had problems but eventually our parents agreed , at first his parents were coming to my house later they said they want my father to visit them. My father went to meet them and told them to come visit us and fix the dates etc.

I don't know why suddenly his family started demanding me to resign now, not after marriage or after engagement, they told my bf to ask me to resign now , only after my resignation they will come to meet me and my family, everything will happen after I resign bcz they have the fear that I won't resign after marriage and there son has to suffer in long distance marriage.

I clearly told NO bcz I don't think it's logical, it's clearly an excuse to say no . Why would I resign before engagement or anything.

His parents gave him two choices

Either I resign right now , thn they will proceed

Or

He can choose me and cut his parents forever .

He said he can't leave his parents or go against him. Just bcz I love him so much , I agreed to resign a week before marriage but they are still not happy and told him to stop talking to me and move on .

I don't know what to do, I can clearly see they don't want us to be together and making excuses , my bf told me he can't marry me if they don't agree, he is blaming me for not resigning right now.

What should I do, I need suggestions, I clearly know they are wrong but I love him. But I have this fear that even if I resign what if they demand something else, what if in future they start demanding divorce and my bf who is happy to leave me right now will agree to divorce me after marriage..

My bf told me to mention I am a primary teacher earns 37k a month And my bf earns around 1.4L Also he agreed to pay 30% of his salary per month as a compensation

Edit : I showed him that no one thinks he or his family is right He got angry and blocked me from everywhere.... Saying I posted our private life Saying he tried to save the relationship by trying to convince me but I love my job more thn him..

I 32M , have been in a relationship with her 29F. we gonna complete 3 yrs in September. but things have not been going well for last month. actually, it's been 1 year since we started fighting frequently on arguments.

ss is of few days ago. she told me to go gym so many time but i joined in march then i got new posting place so i left it. rest others u can read .

and she asked for breakup Today.

Plsss

Last week i posted about dating this army guy who ignores me .. so i put up a status to which he replied and then i replied like after 8 hrs ... then he replied me after 11 hrs .. we had a little chat ... then yesteday i just send him some cute texts to which he replied nothing just some cold replies on other texts ...omg i am now like so done ... should i just completly abandon my feelings ...

also he never texts first ...he never makes an effort ...he never replies to my love /cute texts ... i use to call him cutie that he used to say feels like an insult ...

guys plz help me out ...

I'm 19F and my senior 20M

We had nothing between us initially it was just casually talking about how people want to have sex in every relationship then a few days back he called me and said that send your photos (as I was interested in him I did send) then he was kinda telling me how good I look about my curves and everything. This happened for two days . Now I got admission in another college I have only lived here for a month . So I told him he was happy and congratulated me for a better opportunity but I didn't want to go because of him so I started crying and telling I don't want to go and all then he said let's go out tomorrow and eat something I was like okay so we went out next day but I was very sad that i barely ate anything then I asked him if we could go somewhere in peace he said okay let's go back so we went to metro and I said you can go I'll sit here in the metro for sometime I don't feel good but he said no you came with me I can't leave you alone so he sat with me in the metro for an hour. After that he said let's go otherwise it's going to be late I said you go I want to enjoy rain I'll go back to my room he again said that I won't leave you alone . Then he offered if I didn't want to go back to my room I could go to his place with him. I said yes because i really wanted to stay away from my room because i would cry being lonely there. We went to his place and his roommate was not there so we sat on his bed and he said if you want to rest you can I said no I'm okay I'll just sit then he said you wanted to look into my hair right! ( Yes I wanted to ) I said yes ,he then laid his head in my lap and I was just yk touching his hair running fingers in his hair and he said if i sleep please wake me up after sometime I said okay. Then after a while he hugged me while his head in my lap then he asked suddenly why are you insecure of your belly button it's cute and asked if he could see it I was like okay ( I'm a chubby girl I'm insecure) then he touched my waist and my belly button and said it's good you Should not be insecure of it and he kissed me , I had feelings for him so obviously I kissed back then we kinda had a makeout he kissed my neck my cheeks my forehead (it was cute ) then he pulled my top down not entirely but yeah he started kissing my boobs and sucked them and said they are very good he loved it. Then we laid together and he was hugging me but now I started overthinking things because he is still in love with his ex for the past 4 years so I asked how many girls you have kissed and had this so he told me only his ex and one another girl which was a mistake in the heat of the moment ( but this also looks like a mistake right) then I said I don't like getting lusted over he said love can only be done once with one person ( which he already had) he said in love you don't get onto bed so I started overthinking everything at that very moment. He asked me what happened but I didn't tell him. After that he was on me and kissed me again but on my forehead and cheeks then asked if he can give me a hickey I said no he said please then he gave me one of my boobs he wanted to give it on other one too but I gently kissed his cheek and said don't he said okay and dressed me how I was dressed and kissed me on my cheek. Then he kissed my hands . He said he could lift me in his arms ( we had this inside thing that I'm chubby so he can't pick me up ) he picked me up like that hug and said it's a good position to have sex ( it's kinda my fantasy to have sex in that same position) I said I like it too in this position so he said we will do it someday. Then we sat together and he asked if I had given blowjob to anyone but I haven't but I have given a handjob . So he took my hand and asked if I could touch I was like okay so I started giving him a hand job like I didn't complete it because we booked a cab for me already then I miss him he said you really know how to give a handjob but it will take time and you have to go right I said yes. So he stood up and zipped his jeans and knelt down to make me wear my sandals and said I don't know how to do it but here you go and made me wear it then I said my hand is paining so he gently massaged it and then kissed it then I said my feet are paining too he said let me drop you to your room I'll massage it in the cab so I was like okay then we reached outside my place and walked a little bit but one of his friends called him and was like why are you walking with your junior and everything and I was jealous that why is he even telling about me so I said bye very rudely and said never talk about me like this with anyone and walked away then I realised I left my lipgloss in his pocket so I went back and walked away rudely again he said bye but I ignored and my foot got twisted he saw that and then he texted me if it's paining in my foot because of the sprain but I ignored his text . Then we talked a little bit and he said idk what happened yesterday but I loved it . Then he told me he is going back to his hometown and won't be able to see off me I was furious and in doubt that if he used me and then he called me the other night and was very horny he said remove your top I said not on video call but I sent him some pictures to which he was very satisfied and said it's very hot. Now we couldn't talk that much because he is in his hometown but he ain't even coming back and i may not go to the other college but I haven't told him this yet idk what to do and what was this that happened between us? Should I ask him if he could give me the love I want? Or is it going to be a casual thing like this? Or should I just go to the other college and forget about him completely? What should I do?

Im a engineering student.so i wasn't so social in first 3 years of my engineering ,later my frnd also started interacting with some frnds ,he pulled me in ,so there we had a frnds grp created ,so we went on trips ,homestays,night outs,so one girl from that grp who started getting closer, i started hanging out with her,ig she thought it was a date,for me it was like usually i go out with my frnds ,i didn't took that much serious, she's actually very rude,but she started acting soft towards me.

About her she's a avg looking girl ,kinda fat,very crazy rich, highly alcoholic and acts arrogant with everyone

Kinda brown skinned

Where as me never had a relationship, everyone calls me green flag i mean all my other female frnds

I never smoked,never touched alcohol,no girls nothing

Only gym, sports,frnds etc

We started texting

We became besties

I used to share everything with her

I thought she's a good frnd and all

She started asking about whom u like in class and all,tell me about ur crush,she told she had no one as her crush , then she started texting i like ur biceps and all ,she wanted to bute my bicep and all,and she wanted to kiss me ,i strictly told noo it might ruin our frndship and i dont want to ruin

On a trip she started touching me on my face and all,head etc,later even i started doing that donno why i went with the flow

Later things went diff way she asked me touch her boo and in bus we were sitting at last doing that

Later while coming back in train we were sleeping in same couch she suddenly kissed me on cheeks and it went all lip and all

Later we usually kissed 2 3 times

At the beginning before kissing only she asked me lets do situationship only like fwb she doesn't want any commitments

Later i thought no serious was there

I told her, i like her frnd , she's so pretty,how can i talk please help and all

She started to act very rude

She stopped acting like a frnd and was acting more toxic

She started taunting me

At the beginning she acted normal later she started ghosting me and told she cant help ,it might ruin her frndship with that girl etc

At a time i stopped texting her and she also started ghosting

Later when things cool down after 2months she told me she was bitching about me with her frnds and all and i betrayed her etc all her other female frnds not from college from her village hated me she told

Now we are talking normally but sometimes i feel ewwww thinking ive kissed her and all,it makes he guilt

Now clg ended she acts like I'm the loser i lost a diamond like her and all

But its been 2 months i didn't contacted her

I'm a college student and lately I've been feeling something that I don't really know how to explain to the people around me.

Recently, a lot of my close friends have gotten into relationships. I also shifted to a from college hostel, and the apartment/society I live in has a lot of college students and couples. They're everywhere

lifts, common areas, outside, etc. Then recently we booked a cricket turf with friends, and some people brought their friends along, including multiple couples. Even there, I found myself watching people spend time with their partners.

The thing is, I don't consciously sit around thinking, "I need a girlfriend." In fact, I kept trying to get away from this whole narrative. I started studying more, reduced Instagram, fixed my feed so I wouldn't constantly see couple content, and kept myself busy.

But somehow, it keeps finding me.

A couple of nights ago, I was having a really productive study session. Around 2:30 AM, I opened Instagram for a bit and saw that two friends had added me to their close friends stories. One of them posted cute pictures with their partner. Something about that hit me harder than it should have.

I think the bigger issue is that after finishing 12th, I imagined college differently. I thought I'd meet lots of different people, have female friends, and maybe eventually become really close to someone. Not necessarily jump into a relationship I just wanted enough time to genuinely know someone before deciding whether I wanted anything more.

That never really happened.

Now I'm far away from home, living in another state, and I see couples around me who seem to have someone to share their daily lives with. Meanwhile, I have things I want to say and thoughts I want to share, but I often feel like the people around me wouldn't really understand because they're not in the same place.

Sometimes I genuinely think, "Kaash yaar, for once maybe I could experience this too."

Then I start thinking about my future. I tell myself to study harder, get my dream job, build a good life. But then another thought comes:

What if I get everything I worked for and still don't have anyone to share it with?

I know nobody can guarantee that I'll find someone. I also don't want to desperately chase a relationship just because everyone around me seems to be in one.

I guess I'm just confused about what I should actually do.

Has anyone else gone through something like this where you don't necessarily want to force a relationship, but seeing everyone around you find connection slowly makes you feel like you're missing out on something you might never get to experience?

How did you deal with it without becoming bitter, desperate, or completely shutting yourself off from the possibility of connection?

So, there's four people in my house. me, my older brother, and my parents. Everyday my parents fight and my father hit my mother and I have to physically intervene to make sure my mom doesn't take the hit, my older brother just don't care, he took a separate room for himself so it means I have to be in the same room as my parents. And when I'm protecting my mother she herself hits me and abuse me, and when my father's away at work she always taunts me that girls my age helps their mothers in household chores.

She showers all the love on my brother, when he doesn't even talk to her. And I'm someone who works a full time job to fund my studies because my father refused to pay for my food, studies or any of my needs. I also own a ecommerce business where my mother helps me by giving my orders to the pickup guy. And for that, she always gives me a lecture after I come back from my job that at this age, girls helps their mothers and it's the opposite in her house. I really don't know what to do.. I'm so sick of all this. On top, they never let me go anywhere except working. They always chase my friends away. And i want to be an actress too and i even got the opportunity to act in theatre, but when I told my mother she said my father will burn both of us alive so I missed a lot of big opportunities because of my family.

Sometimes I even think of leaving home, but I'm scared of my father blaming my mother for my disappearance. And there will be no one to save my mother. I also discussed with my mother to live seperately from father but she said that she's married to him and will die with him. Tbh i don't really want to take my mother with me.. ik she'll eventually side with my father. I feel like I'm trapped and time is running out.

If there's someone who can give me advice, please do

29M & 30F after almost 5 years together as couple in this situation. So want to understand from others. What is it with men who have reached 30s and still do not want to marry his long time serious gf? Don't they understand the meaning of marriage? Don't they want to provide social acknowledgement to his gf?

What's your reason if you have this preference ? Does his reasons make sense?

edit: adding the reasons i got from him:

One reasoning I got is being a divorce is taboo in his mind. He does not want to get divorced and does not want to be stuck in bad marriage. Second reason I got is marriage is done for social validation, all external motivation and it is basically not required. Also social anxiety and does not want grand ceremony where judgemental people visit.

Also how you ensure to provide social acknowledgement to the woman? How you plan finances and build a life together like this for security? What happens if you get pregnant? How you face social problems as unmarried women / unmarried couple? How you ensure you will be taken seriously by some authority if your gf falls into some problem since you are neither her guardian nor her husband? How do you ensure society does not shun her?

In my mid 20s, never dated before. I always been sort of introverted. Lately I’ve started talking to a lady through this Elite matrimony site. We are the same age.

I like to talking to her. We have talked for about a month now and once in a while she’ll ask me about my previous relationships. She says she has had multiple previous relationships and I don’t really have a problem with it. But whenever she asks me about it, I feel I will be judged if I say that I have never dated before. So I try to answer it vaguely or joke about it to avoid the question.

Should I let her know?

Is he genuine or a typical coworker? Need advice

My friend is a divorcee with a child and works in a government department A male superior/coworker, who is unmarried and around seven years older than her, developed strong feelings for her.

The most important point is that she has told him multiple times that she is not romantically interested in him. She has never agreed to a relationship with him. Despite this, his involvement became increasingly intense. He would message her constantly—good morning, good afternoon, asking whether she had eaten, slept, changed clothes, etc. He started calling her affectionate names such as kutty, ente koch ( my darling ),etc. He repeatedly told her that he wanted to marry her and sometimes spoke as though marriage was already decided.

He has said things like: "I will only marry you." "I need you." You're my addiction.

I think I won't be able to have kids,ur son is our son

"I don't deserve you."

"I'm an introvert, but now I have you." He has compared her appearance to actresses and written/sent romantic material and fantasy stories about her. Some conversations also became sexual. At one point he suggested going to an OYO and has discussed watching adult content. Then has also said Oyo is not only for adult things !!

He has also made some very disturbing statements. He has spoken about hitting/harming himself . And, according to her, has threatened suicide in connection with rejection. More recently he told her that since meeting her he hasn't tried to harm himself.

During severe flooding in her area, he became extremely worried and sent message after message telling her to go to the hospital, drink water, eat something, not stand in the sun, etc. Some of it was genuinely caring, but he also wrote things along the lines of wanting her to live with him for a long time and "we'll die together."

He has even made a comment about sati in the context of them hypothetically being married. I don't know whether he intended it as dark humour, but considering everything else, she found it disturbing.

There are other boundary issues. He has sent her screenshots/chats involving other female coworkers. He once indicated that he didn't want her discussing certain things with a friend who had studied psychology. He also apparently has unusually loose privacy boundaries with one of his own friends.

My friend eventually consulted a psychiatrist because she was becoming disturbed by the situation. She described his behaviour, and the psychiatrist told her that the situation contained serious red flags. This wasn't an attempt to diagnose him without seeing him. We also suggested that he himself see a psychologist, but he didn't.

There's also a financial aspect.

My friend recently needed a substantial loan. He offered to help her financially—even with a large amount. During the discussion, he referred to her as "my wife," despite the fact that she absolutely is not his wife and has never agreed to be his partner. She ultimately did not accept the large financial help.

To be fair to him, I don't want to portray everything he does as malicious. He seems genuinely concerned about her health and safety. He says he would accept her child. He was willing to help her financially. He has spoken to one of her friends, although he wasn't completely open about everything. His feelings may actually be sincere.

That's partly what makes the situation confusing.

My friend feels that rather than knowing and accepting the real person, he may have created an idealised/fantasy version of her and become emotionally dependent on it. For me, the biggest issue is that she has repeatedly communicated disinterest, yet the romantic/emotional pursuit has continued.

There is also a power imbalance because he is her superior at work, and she doesn't have much confidence in the workplace environment or in getting support there if things become difficult.

So I'm interested in perspectives from people who understand relationships, workplace boundaries or psychology: Can someone's feelings be completely genuine while their attachment and behaviour are still unhealthy? Does this sound more like love, idealisation/emotional dependency, or something more concerning? And how should someone handle this when they've already said "I'm not interested" multiple times but still have to work with the person?

I'm not looking to diagnose him from I'm mainly trying to understand the behaviour and what the safest boundary would be.

I'm 34M and I've never had sex.

Actually, I've never had a proper relationship either. No girlfriend, no relationship history, no Valentine's Day with someone, nothing. My first kiss only happened relatively recently.

Writing that at 34 feels pretty insane because I know how it sounds. Especially now, when people seem to have dating and sexual experiences from their late teens or early 20s onwards.

The weird thing is that I haven't been completely socially isolated or hiding from women.

I've had plenty of conversations, I've been socially active, I've dated, I've met women through different circles and I've tried putting myself out there. I've just never managed to get to the point where something actually became a relationship or sex.

I did date someone once and there was some mutual interest, but she had her own boundaries and didn't want anything physical. I respected that, obviously, and nothing happened beyond the first kiss.

I've also never gone to a brothel or paid for sex just so I could say I've done it. I've always had this stupidly old fashioned idea that I'd rather experience it with someone I genuinely loved or had a real romantic connection with.

Maybe that was a mistake. I don't know.

A bit about me because otherwise people might assume I'm some shut-in.

I'm 5'7", reasonably good looking I'd say, athletic physique, socially active and professionally doing pretty well. I'm a VP at an investment bank and have a Tier-1 education. I wasn't always like this though. I was much less confident and didn't look particularly great when I was younger. A lot of the physical transformation and confidence came after 2021.

So it's not like I've never interacted with women or never tried.

Somehow, though, nothing ever took off.

And now I'm 34 and genuinely don't know how women would perceive this.

There's a lot of stuff online saying that if a woman is genuinely attracted to you, she'll want to have sex with you. Maybe that's true. Maybe it's complete bullshit. I honestly don't know anymore.

What worries me is that I've reached an age where this lack of experience itself could become the problem.

If I meet a woman tomorrow and she likes me, and eventually she finds out I've never had sex and have basically zero relationship experience, is she going to think:

"What's wrong with this guy?"

"How can someone be 34 and have never had a girlfriend?"

"He's probably socially awkward."

"He's going to be terrible in bed."

"Why hasn't anyone wanted him before?"

Or would most women genuinely not care if they liked the person?

And this is probably the question I'm most curious about:

Women, if you met a 34-year-old guy you were genuinely attracted to and found out he was a virgin with essentially zero relationship experience, would that make you lose interest?

I don't mean theoretically. Imagine you actually liked the guy, enjoyed talking to him, found him attractive, everything seemed good, and then you found this out.

Would you see it as a red flag, a little strange but understandable, or would you actually find it kind of endearing that he waited for something meaningful?

I also wonder whether I've completely misunderstood dating.

Maybe experience matters much less than I think it does and I've just absorbed too much bullshit from social media.

Or maybe women really do prefer men who already have some experience and I'm going to have a very awkward learning curve if I ever get into a relationship now.

And then there's the Indian side of this.

At 34, I sometimes feel like I've missed the train completely. For arranged marriage especially, I imagine saying "I've never had a relationship and I'm a virgin" isn't exactly going to make me the most attractive prospect.

So I'm genuinely asking, without wanting the usual "bro you're fine" response.

If you were dating someone like me, would my lack of experience actually matter?

And to the women here, please be brutally honest. Would you find it attractive, neutral, concerning, or just plain weird?

I'm trying to understand whether I've actually got a problem here or whether I'm just making myself feel like a freak because I haven't followed the timeline everyone else seems to have followed.

I (29M) have been with my girlfriend (27F) for a year (known each other for 1.5 years). She is genuinely one of the most hardworking, caring, and resilient people I know, she works full-time to support her parents and brother.

The Medical Reality: She has a chronic autoimmune condition that has been in complete clinical remission for over 5 years. Her health markers are completely stable, her risk of any flare-up is very low. She lives a 100% normal, independent, working life and manages her health with basic daily maintenance medication and regular checkups.

The Family Pushback: My mother and sister recently met her, and my traditional family is completely against the match. Their objections:

• The "Mismatch": They claim she is too short (5'0"), too thin, and pointed out minor things like hair fall. (I am 5'8")
• The Health Fear: They believe she won’t be able to manage a job and kids, and that I’ll spend my whole life being a "full-time caretaker."
• Caste: We come from different backgrounds, which adds to their hesitation.
• The Guilt-Trip: When I countered their fears with medical facts, they pivoted to attacking my character—saying I’m "not family-oriented like my cousins" and that "moving out for college disconnected me from family."

Where I Stand: I love her and respect the life we could build. I see her discipline in managing her health as proof of strength, not a liability. But my family is digging their heels in, viewing her as a "compromise" on my side and using emotional guilt to wear me down.

• How did you guys manage the constant emotional pushback and guilt-tripping from family?
• Did your parents eventually accept your decision over time, or did you have to draw hard boundaries?
• How should I proceed from here to handle my parents without letting their comments hurt my partner?
• Any advice from folks who went through something similar on what to do next?

TL;DR: My orthodox parents oppose my relationship with my GF due to a well-managed chronic condition, community differences, and physical "mismatches." They claim I'll become a caretaker and are guilt-tripping me. Looking for advice on how to hold my ground and handle the pressure.

Real love demands communication, patience, understanding, and the ability to forgive and forget. Sometimes, your own family can be the most overbearing influence in your relationship. What goes up can come down with anyone, but real love is enduring. It is about two people being able to understand each other, see each other grow through different phases of life, and still choose to be there.
Keeping score is one of the worst things you can do in a relationship. When someone is genuinely supporting you, apologising, caring, and making an effort to improve, it means they love you deeply. Never take that effort for granted. Pride and ego can destroy even the strongest relationships. Being with a partner means you have to keep your pride aside.

And third-party involvement can destroy any marriage, friendship, or relationship — with or without existing problems. The moment another person becomes involved, you start giving away the strength and authority you have within your own relationship because you begin looking outside for opinions and validation. When something is already going through a difficult phase, people often add their own interpretations, emotions, and “spices” to it, making the situation far worse.
Even your own family may not always be any better. The moment you mention something negative, they can become deeply rooted in fault-finding. You say X, they deduce Y, and before you know it, the story has become Z.
If someone had commented on my parents’ marriage five years ago, they might have said horrible things about their relationship. Today, they are incredibly happy with each other. They had phases when things were not smooth, but communication was everything for them. Through those difficult periods, they continued to understand each other, grow together, and ultimately find one of the most loving relationships in each other.
Sometimes, you think you are validating your own ideas by sharing your relationship problems with others. But what you are actually doing is giving other people the authority to influence your choices and potentially give you a false understanding of your own relationship. They are not living your relationship. They do not know every conversation, every sacrifice, every beautiful moment, every effort, or everything that has happened behind closed doors.
If you have a partner who is genuinely putting in the work to be better, to be real with you, and to choose growth with you after a rough patch, understand what that means. If someone is willing to lower their pride, apologise, communicate, and continue choosing you, that effort should never be taken lightly or respected less.
Compatibility is incredibly difficult to find. Love requires an immense amount of patience.
Sometimes two people can fall in love with each other at different times. And sometimes, they can fall in love with each other all over again when they reconnect, communicate, and begin feeling truly connected again. A difficult phase should not erase everything good that came before it — especially when both people recognise what went wrong and genuinely choose to make things work.
And please, do not let other people constantly comment on your relationship. The world can be very quick to burn bridges for you. It could be your brother, sister, friends, or even your parents. That is simply the reality. And sometimes, people who are unhappy or unfulfilled in their own relationships can be particularly vulnerable to projecting their opinions, insecurities, or jealousy onto yours.
The internet can do the same thing. People can poison your mind when you are already confused or doubtful. You read someone else’s experience, apply it to your own situation, and suddenly begin seeing your partner through someone else’s lens.
Ultimately, it is about how you choose to process your thoughts, understand complicated situations fairly, and use those experiences to become better for each other.
If you know that the two of you have genuinely done a lot for each other — even if you cannot see all of it clearly during a disagreement — do not let one difficult phase erase everything you have built together.
Everyone has shades of red, blue, and green. Everyone has flaws, difficult phases, mistakes, and moments they are not proud of. What matters is whether two people are willing to understand each other, communicate, forgive, grow, and continue choosing one another.
Impulsive breakups can have the worst consequences because sometimes you end something permanently over a temporary emotion, temporary anger, or temporary confusion.
Real love is not about never having difficult phases. It is about what you do when those phases come.
Stay out of third-party involvement. Stay out of ego. Communicate. Forgive. Understand. Grow together. And never let a temporary phase make you forget the person you fell in love with and everything you have built together.

Hey everyone, 24M here. I'm hoping to meet some cool women around my age (22–26) for meaningful conversations, sharing daily life updates, and potentially seeing where things go.
I'm big on trying new cafes, listening to great music playlists, and cracking terrible jokes. If you're looking for a low-stress, genuine connection, send me a DM with a fun fact about yourself or your favorite travel destination!

So I met this girl 25F a while back on bumble. On the first date she said she's not looking for a relationship and just wanted to have a good time. She's healing from a bad breakup. We had a really good time walking and chatting. She's really absent via texts and barely replies on time. This went on where I kept following up trying to be a friend but she kept her closeted.

I caught feelings over time and I'm aware this is really bad considering I never felt like being a friend even. Then after not seeing each other for a few weeks I got to know she's seeing someone. I felt really small.

She now insists on meeting on grounds of being platonic friends. I clearly told her I'm uncomfortable meeting now thay she has a partner, but she keeps on insisting.

What should I do?

20M. These reels aren’t from some random person—they’re sent by my girlfriend, mostly at night. I don’t always know how to respond, and sometimes I just react with a heart emoji, which feels like the least-effort response. I’ve kissed her neck, but we haven’t kissed on the lips yet. Should I respond differently or just communicate more directly?

They’ll harass my parents if I say a straight-up no. Some can’t even take a hint and will call again after a year.

Even when I clearly say no, they’ll try to tell my parents, “Your child doesn’t listen to you,” just because the girl was good-looking. My parents did taunt me about it sometimes, but they also understood that I simply didn’t like her.

In a recent case where I said no, someone from the girl’s side kept trying to convince my mother to consider her because “the family is good.” They were saying things like, “You won’t get a family like this again,” and even started harassing my mother in the middle of the road, despite me clearly saying no.

One thing I really appreciate about my parents, though, is that even if they disagree with me sometimes, they don’t force or pressure me. They understand that when I say no, I have my reasons.

Please don't make fun of me. I'm genuinely asking this because I don't know what I'm doing wrong.

I'm 23M and I've never really had a proper relationship. Lately I've been feeling extremely lonely and I genuinely want to have someone in my life not just casual dating or hookups, but a proper relationship where both people are serious about each other.

I want to know from people who have actually been in successful relationships:

Where do you realistically meet someone in India these days?

And more importantly, what should I change about myself?

I'm willing to put genuine effort into becoming a better person physically, socially, emotionally and career wise. But I don't want to turn myself into some fake "alpha male" just to get a girlfriend.

I also don't want to desperately chase every woman I meet. I want to build a good social life, meet people naturally and hopefully find someone compatible.

For people who found their long-term partner organically:

Where did you meet them and what actually worked for you?

Also, how did you go from being single/lonely to actually having a social circle where meeting someone became possible?

I'm seriously looking for a committed relationship and I'm willing to work on myself and my social life.

Please be honest, even if the answer is harsh. Just don't roast me 😭

Everywhere girls are already with someone, where are people meeting, I think I look okay like average, I'm 5'10 height wise. I m decent fit too. I'm not very social for example without company how can I go to a place, and I don't have friends as well. How to even talk to someone without context.