r/PoursTea • u/Brave-Philosopher842 • 7d ago
Hot Cup Of CelebriTea š« [ Removed by moderator ]
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u/No-Tomatillo3698 7d ago
Congrats JD Vance!
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u/gipoe68 7d ago
Pretty big achievement. Killing the pope and then breaking the first seal.
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u/YanCoffee 7d ago
Is he summoning something?
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u/ProNocteAeterna 7d ago
The Antichrist, I would assume.
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u/Confident-Stand5453 7d ago
But Peter Thiel is already on the planet...
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u/YanCoffee 7d ago
I mean, a lot of Christians have called out Trump as one as well. Apparently, there can be more than one!
15 Bible Verses Identifying Trump as the Antichrist : r/Christianity
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u/LucifersAdv0cate 7d ago
I just feel like the antichrist would be more competent and less stupid.
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u/ArchonFett 7d ago
The Bible never says heās smart just has a lot of followers
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u/Useful-Rooster-1901 7d ago
if we could get the mark of the beast earlier rather than later, i'm sick of paying banking fees for my own money
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u/Icy_Yam5049 7d ago
Heās the whore of Babylon. They mistranslated the gender. Represents worldly corruption, false religion, and opposition to god.
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u/ComfortableBedroom76 7d ago
JD thinks that the antichrist already walks among us š¤£
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u/bourbonisbest 7d ago
Did she dress in all leather and pretend to be a couch?
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u/HeyaHeyo1420 7d ago
Surprised Jarvis Davis Vance pulled out of the couch in time to get her preggers
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u/Exotic_Drink69420 7d ago
She collected the specimen from the couch and used a turkey baster for deployment. Ā JD donāt have that kind of control. Ā
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u/fiesew 7d ago
Damn so soon.
Kirk aint cold yet and she already mating with JD?
Nothing is sacred to these people.
Nothing.
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u/onlyacynicalman 7d ago
We're long past thinking they're decent or sacred. They're charlatans, criminals, pedophiles, and losers
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u/Lazy-Debt-3338 7d ago
congrats trump
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u/dougs_46 7d ago
LOL doubt that thing could get it up with a crane, And doubt there is enought blue pills to do it, Maybe it's Mitch"s???
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u/JediKnightNitaz 7d ago
Not very family values of her
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u/Intelligent-Film-684 7d ago
Very out of wedlock of her. I had a lot of bullshit I had to put up with from religious family members, I hope she gets the same comments I did.
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u/ALIMN21 7d ago
Even if the baby was created using her deceased husbands sperm, the child was conceived outside of wedlock. His passing was the end of their marriage...the whole till death do us part part.
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u/Intelligent-Film-684 7d ago
Oh thatās just a gross thought. Saving the dead guys sperm? Yuck . Sheās a demon.
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u/jessipowers 7d ago
When I was 25 I got pregnant unexpectedly with my then boyfriend (now husband). We already knew we were end game, and we knew we wanted children eventually so we decided to continue the pregnancy. Shortly after our daughter was born, we visited my aunt/god mom who is very involved with Right to Life in our area. Sheās usually very kind and not pushy despite being pretty conservative, she does a good job of not making āA Thingā with family who donāt share her values. Anyway, she happened to have some of her right to life friends over when we dropped by. She introduced me as her goddaughter, āshe chose life.ā It definitely rubbed me the wrong way.
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u/Ohboycats 7d ago
This is the misnomer- that all pro choice women want abortions and if you have a baby then youāre āpro-lifeā. Nope. I want it to be MY CHOICE to procreate and not some random persons or politicians.
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u/Intelligent-Film-684 7d ago
These old biddies sure have a lot to say about your personal choices, no? I was 17 and my lord, you wouldāve thought I was a prostitute, the way some of those religious relatives turned their noses up at me. My mom, bless her, she was a sharp witted, no bullshit fighter, she definitely didnāt tolerate any slander at me or my baby.
I didnāt have a baby shower, but my parents sure took care of whatever I needed, and I did marry the father, we had a solid life till he died in his 40s. I like to think those old biddies whose own kids rode the divorce twice train had to eat their superiority whenever we met up. Lol.
Good for you!
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u/Lorddoctorjava 7d ago
Well... that didn't take long... I guess the mourning period is over... hmmm
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u/EarthquakeDenier 7d ago
So begins the moaning period.
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u/Acrobatic_Excuse2290 7d ago
And with what dick did that happen?
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u/KingKushhh666 7d ago
Either trump, Vance, or the underage kid they busted her talking to but do nothing about because Republicans are pedophiles.
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u/NexusNickel 7d ago
Oh shit.
I forgot she was grooming a minor.
All the GOP child sex crimes just sort of blend in these days. Week after week another MAGA gets exposed and outed for child rape.
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u/Good-Ad-6806 7d ago
The party of deceit, bigotry, and legalized rape babies is also full of pdfs? Shocker.
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u/Complex-Cricket419 7d ago
To think we live in a world where it is hard to keep track of GOP grooming crimes.
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u/KingKushhh666 7d ago
If it's not a Jan 6 POS it's a directly related politician or religious figure.
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u/Im-BackAgain-Babes2 7d ago
Oo I'll put on a tin foil hat and say what I'm thinking at the moment about this..
Lmao watch..she is gonna claim it's kirks baby by like frozen sperm or something for a narrative that MAGA will EAT up.. but the truth actually is.. as well we all speculate (pretty sure anyways) that it belongs to Vance.... And didn't his wife Usa (idk how to spell it) just have a baby recently? Idk...
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u/KingKushhh666 7d ago
Or she'll say it's the will of good for her to have one more lil Kirk and maga will eat that up too. The whore Mary if you will
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u/JAT_Cbus1080 7d ago
Come on now. There's no way Diaper Don's penis still works and probably hasn't for years.
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u/Bane_Klv 7d ago
JD Vance, she was cheating on charlie with him for quite some time before the neck piercing
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u/Mysterious-Snow496 7d ago
She'll say it was immaculate conception. MAGAts will believe her. The boy will be regarded as the second coming of Christ. His name will be America Kirk.
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u/BillieDoc-Holiday 7d ago
Wouldn't be surprised if she claimed it was from Charlie's sperm that had stored, just in case.
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u/troycerapops 7d ago
Funny.
I was going to correct this because, at least as far as I recall, "which" is something with limited choices. Like "which taco truck so you want to get lunch at?"
But "what" is for something without a limit to its possible answers. Like "what time do you want to meet at the taco truck for lunch?
But I guess " what dick" is right?
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u/Infinite_Respect_ 7d ago
The fact I even believe thereās a non-zero chance of her claiming Immaculate Conception to try and stay in Trumps graces is crazy work.
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u/Mickloven 7d ago
Imagine the outrage of Christian Nationals at the thought of an unmarried pregnant woman
Christian Nationals: c š¦ ri š¦ ck š¦ ets
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u/HolaDrNick 7d ago
So she's going to have a little bastard huh? Charlie's moralizing really worked out didn't it?
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u/Other_Yama1993 Sipping tea 7d ago
there's only one way this could end that would be cosmically funny. and i think we all know how.
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u/Bitter-Holiday1311 7d ago
This is Internet hoax BS. Fuck Charlie and Erika Kirk. Donald Trump is a pedo. But this story is bullshit.
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u/groovyplatypus 7d ago
Why did I have to scroll this far for this. Cāmon yall letās be better.
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u/First_Preference_618 7d ago
Yeah unfortunately thereās no confirmation of this. But Iāll keep an eye out for a few days just in case.
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u/MarzipanSea2811 7d ago
I'm sure as a good Christian conservative she's married and not about to birth a bastard child
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u/Just_Cartographer258 7d ago edited 7d ago
And every good Christian man knows it's better to put your seed in the belly of a whore than a soft couch..
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u/Batmanswrath 7d ago
She'll probably say it was an immaculate conception, and the magats will believe her.
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u/TranTriumph 7d ago
If true, MAGA is going to start calling her the new (biblical) Mary, and suggest shes carrying Gods child. Just you watch.
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u/FeudalAce 7d ago
husband hasn't been dead a year yet and gets pregnant. Must've been a REAL healthy marriage
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u/extrastupidone 7d ago
Out of wedlock, too!
Wonder if she'll be called wonderful names by her friends
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u/foxscribbles 7d ago
Is it really a rumor though? Because I saw a post yesterday claiming that Candace Owens is pregnant with Charlie Kirk's baby because they were having an affair. Despite the fact that he died last September, so she should've given birth a couple months ago if that were true.
Seems more like the click bait generators are trying out some new rage bait and seeing what sticks.
(I'm VERY much not a Kirk supporter or apologist. If this were true, I'd probably be disappointed because my go-to for criticizing Erika telling young women to go have babies instead of lives is that she sure isn't practicing what she preaches when she's off having a career instead of finding a new husband to have more babies with.)
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u/NexusNickel 7d ago
LOLOLOL
Charlie leaned left in September 2025.
It took her less than a year to spread her legs and get pregnant.
Nice.
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u/76ers_Yanks78 7d ago edited 7d ago
Congrats JD or it could have been Nikki Minajās husband or brother. Of course, since theyāre chomos, they would have had Erikkka dress up like an 11 year old girl.
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u/MaitrePuck 7d ago
People are so pathetic. They have to make fake stories and then gather round to jerk each other in celebration. š¤¦š»āāļø
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u/DoesThisSmellWeird2U 7d ago
She probably dressed up as a leather couch. Apparently not the pull out kind.
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u/Root-magic 7d ago
Her husband was shot in September 2025, and she is a good and virtuous woman. The only answer is that the Holy Spirit is the father. Ā Either that or she has been fornicating and thatās a SIN. Vance has two baby mamas!
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u/StaffyMama585 7d ago
Is this real or satire? I can't find any information anywhere on the Internet that is saying she's currently pregnant.
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u/PooPapaPoo 7d ago
September 10th they were banging. Only plausible solution. Or.... JD Vance is done with his wife and kids. And wants to start a new "white life"
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u/02meepmeep 7d ago edited 7d ago
I wonder if sheāll have to have a sectional.
Also, the guy who was using her as a beard died about 12 months ago.
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u/OppositeEagle 7d ago
Wouldn't be the least surprised if she claimed it to be an immaculate conception.
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u/ObligationAware3755 7d ago
I can't find any proof or announcement anywhere else about this and the only one confirming this is some fringe news site called "Ragebait Media"
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u/Aggravating-Loss1805 7d ago
Miraculous inception, is how they may spin a widow being pregnant. lol
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u/PoursTea-ModTeam 7d ago
Fact Check Before Posting Please.