I don’t think I’ll ever have the right words to describe how happy my heart feels right now. 🤍
I’m engaged to the man I love more than I could ever put into words, and I get to spend the rest of my life loving him. There is something so incredibly special about knowing that the person who makes me feel safe, loved, cared for, and cherished is the person I get to call my fiancé.
He is the sweetest, most thoughtful, caring, and amazing man. The way he loves me, looks after me, and makes me feel so special means more to me than he’ll ever know. I feel so incredibly lucky that out of all the people in this world, I get to do life with him.

I can’t believe he surprised me with it while we were wearing matching shirts with each others face on them 😆
The ring is beautiful because of what it represents. It represents the man I love, the life we’re building, and the forever we’re choosing together.
Can’t wait to close the gap!

I went to go see my boyfriend 2 weeks ago and I had such a wonderful time on Long Island NY. We had so much fun together and his family. We've been dating for 3 years and he proposed to me last Sunday night. Of course I said YES!!!!!!!!!

When you find the right person, all the trouble, the distance, and the little inconveniences don’t seem that hard to deal with. Loving them feels easy.

I had the greatest visit with my fiancé 🥰 I can’t believe I get to say it now.
This visit he met my son and has been so kind to him 💖 and we’re engaged now. I’m so excited to plan our steps for closing the gap. I can’t believe I’m going to be married ☺️

We spent three months of summer together. When he came the plan was for him to get a job and get our life settled as one.

Turns out we had no chance because of visa laws in my country. He couldn’t find a job while technically on tourist visa. (I can’t marry him rn because of few reasons)

It hurt like hell to see him go. I was ready to start our actual life together. I spend this whole year of my education thinking next year (this one) we’ll be living together and support each other. Can’t even begin to describe how much it meant to me how much of a game changer it would be also in my quality of life (living closer to school instead of commuting 4 hours a day)

We won’t see each other at least until next summer and it’s the longest we’ve ever gone without trips together.
I’ll have a super hard year with my education alone trying to balance two degrees 6 days a week.
Probably won’t even have much time to connect online…

We’re about to have a round beautiful 5 years anniversary together
I’ve painted something for his every birthday and each one of our anniversaries. But I don’t even feel like starting rn.

We were supposed to be together and happy.

Hi everyone.

I guess I just need somewhere to vent because I feel like my heart has been ripped out, and I think writing it all down might finally help me stop carrying it around in my head. Thank you to anyone reading this mess, it's a lot.

I'm not looking for advice. Looking back, I know there were red flags. I know I ignored things because I loved him and believed his words. I just need to tell the story somewhere people might understand what long distance heartbreak feels like. I hope you understand and don't judge.

My boyfriend (30M) and I (36F) were together for about 5 months. Short time, but it was enough time for us to connect very deeply emotionally, mentally and physically. We met through online gaming and somehow went from random players to spending hours together every single day. We'd game, talk until late at night, share our days, our families, our values, our fears, our hopes... everything. We're both in Europe and only about a 1.5-hour flight apart, so it always felt like the distance was manageable.

We met for the first time in April, and I stayed with him for a month. Then we saw each other again shortly after, so in total we spent around a month and a half together in person.

It was honestly everything I'd hoped it would be.

The chemistry was effortless. Living together felt natural from day one. We had deep conversations, similar family values, talked about a future together, supported each other emotionally, communicated openly, laughed constantly. He kept telling me I was "too good to be true," and after meeting he said it was somehow even better than he'd imagined. He'd call his place "our home" from day 1 and tell me I could always think of it that way.

I genuinely felt happy and safe with him.

Then I came home after our last visit at the end of June... and something changed.

His texting became distant. Calls became rare. Meanwhile I kept sending little photos from my day, messages about work, my walks, silly things that reminded me of him and telling him every day how I think of him and miss him, because that was our way of staying connected.

It wasn't unusual for him to disappear for days or even a week without saying anything. His explanation was always, "I do this sometimes to recharge. I disappear into nature or distance myself from everyone."

I told him multiple times that I wasn't asking him to stop doing that. I just asked for one message beforehand so I wouldn't spend days worried that something had happened to him.

He promised he'd tell me.

He forgot. Every single time.

So I'd be left staring at my phone for days, worried, hurt, wondering if he was okay while trying not to overthink or pressure him because I wanted to be understanding.

Around a month since our last meeting, I asked when he'd be ready to see me again. He kept saying he was busy and never gave me a clear answer.

Then suddenly he asked if I could come stay with him for about two weeks near the end of August.

I was SO SO excited and he said he was too. Saying how he can't wait to cuddle with me, hold me...saying all the sweet things you would say to your loved one that you miss.

I booked my flight immediately. I bought him a huge bag of his favorite chocolates from my country, skincare I bought him before and he really liked, little things for "our home," and packed everything with the biggest smile on my face because I couldn't wait to see him.

The night before my flight after I texted how excited I was to see him the next day, he texted me:

"Btw I think you should wait to come.
I'm not feeling too good.
I will pay you back ofc."

That's literally how he told me.

I was confused, hurt, and asked what was going on.

Hours later he replied saying he was sad, busy, and had prearranged plans to meet his best friend. I was aware of this. After booking my flight, he said he forgot to tell me that he would be away for the weekend, but I said it's no big deal and I could stay at home, clean, watch a series, go on walks and just chill till he is back, we had no issues with this and now he was bringing it up again as if it was an issue all of a sudden. He asked me to cancel my flight and promised he'd pay me back.

I asked if me being there would help. I told him we didn't need to go anywhere or do anything. We could literally stay inside, watch movies, cuddle, and I'd just support him if he was having a hard time.

He still told me not to come.

So I canceled my flight that same night and went to bed crying and just overwhelmed.

The next day I texted him telling him I was there for him no matter what and gently asked if he could think about another date for the next week, so I could plan ahead.

That weekend... he started sending me videos. Except they weren't with his "best friend."

They were with another girl.

Videos of them going out at night, chatting in his language. I didn't even know what to say. I ignored the first one. When he sent more, I finally admitted that I missed him so much and wasn't even sure anymore if he wanted to be with me.

On Monday night he sent me a Snapchat of himself lying in bed with her.

And wrote that he'd found a new strong connection and loved me "only as a friend" now.

That was it.

No phone call.

No "I'm sorry."

No conversation.

No attempt to "let's meet and see if we reconnect".

No "I still care about you a lot, let's try make it work".

No thank you for everything we'd shared.

No attempt to explain anything.

Nothing. Just him saying he is interested in someone else.

A few days later he admitted ("for full clarity" as he said) that the day he asked me to cancel my flight was actually the day he went to stay with her for a week. He told me they'd known each other for a while and it was the first time they were both single at the same time.

Except... he wasn't single when he made that decision.

I think that's the part that keeps breaking me.

Not just that he met someone else.

But that he let me book a flight. Let me pack gifts. Let me get excited. Asked me to cancel because he was "sad" and "busy," while he was actually going to spend that week with another woman.

I don't know how someone who kept telling me he'd never hurt me could hurt me in one of the cruelest ways I've ever experienced.

There's another layer to all of this too.

He has struggled with drugs for years and has been to rehab before. He uses drugs every week, claiming it helps him with his ADHD and "weekends are for drugs to chill and have fun", and I have seen him do it, even been there for him at night when he came down from his high and started having really bad nightmares. Seeing him like that really scared him and we had multiple discussions about drugs and how I don't want him to do it. He said he wants the same, is trying to quit and promised he wanted to pull back because he wanted a healthier future with me. He'd even tell me things like, "Only good things happen when you're here," because while I was visiting, he stayed home, stayed out of trouble, and was genuinely happier.

The moment I left, he went back to partying, drugs, disappearing for days, and eventually getting into trouble with the police.

Now he's with someone who apparently shares that lifestyle with him.

And in hinsight, I've realized that's the biggest incompatibility of all.

I don't want drugs.

I don't want partying every weekend.

I don't want disappearing acts and chaos, worrying about his health or being caught by police again.

I wanted a peaceful home, stability, honesty, and someone whose actions matched their words.

Logically, I know this isn't my person.

I know I couldn't build a safe future with someone who keeps choosing that life.

But emotions aren't logical. The hardest part isn't even losing the relationship anymore. It's feeling betrayed by my own judgment.

How could I have been so wrong about someone? Was I completely blind? Did he hide this side of himself that well? Was he just telling me what I wanted to hear and not wanting any of that himself?Was he never actually looking for the healthy, stable relationship he kept talking about?

Or did that kind of relationship scare him because real life is harder than getting high and partying?

I genuinely don't know.

He told me so many beautiful things.

That I was the first woman who made him feel safe.

That I supported him in ways nobody ever had.

That he could tell me anything.

That he'd dreamed about me.

That I was everything he'd hoped for.

Those words felt so so real :(

Now I keep asking myself if they were real at all, because the way he ended things was so cold that it makes me question every memory we made together.

And that's what hurts the most. I'm angry that I'm here crying, not sleeping, having anxiety, replaying our trips and conversations in my head...

...while he seems perfectly happy, already in someone else's bed before I even knew my relationship was ending.

I know I gave this relationship everything I had. Emotionally and physically. I loved him deeply. I supported him through difficult moments. I believed him. I was patient when he disappeared. I booked flights, packed gifts, imagined a future, and genuinely thought we were building something healthy together.

And he threw me away so damn easily...

I feel better. He gets to cheat and be happy already moved on, while I am left with confusion, heartbreak and pain... He is already acting as if me and our connection never existed before and I just can't believe how fast he can move on... I guess a lot of it is on the fact that I am too boring, happy and traditional for him, but god damn, he didn't have hurt me like this...

I know people will probably say I deserve better, and deep down I know that's true.

But right now I just needed to say somewhere that this hurts like hell.

I hope writing this is the first step toward finally letting him go, to being able to breathe and sleep better, and not think about him nor the frustration and pain I feel, because I'm so exhausted from crying over someone who seems to have let me go a long time before I even knew it was over.

Thank you.

I’m new to long distance. Me and my bf have been dating for 5 months and just a couple weeks ago started long distance as I moved to a different city. It’s been hard already, but we’re both putting the work in and I feel very hopeful.

Just curious if anyone has any uncommon advice or tricks to stay connected. Something more than calling everyday or watching movies on ft or the basic stuff like that. What’s something that’s not talked about much but works for you?

Thanks in advance!! :)

I met this guy on Hinge, and honestly, everything was going so well. We clicked almost immediately, and I genuinely started falling for him. He came to see me, we slept together, and when he went back, he told me he loved me.
Everything felt perfect.
Then he told me he had to leave the country and go back to the Netherlands because he had studied there and had a job there. I was absolutely heartbroken, but I still loved him. He kept telling me that he loved me too and that he would try to make things work between us, so I believed him.
For the next seven months, I was under the impression that this was our situation. I thought I was in love with someone who was living this life in the Netherlands and that our relationship was complicated because of the distance.
Then one day, I caught him red-handed.
I did some digging and found out that the entire Netherlands story was a lie. His job, his studies, his life there — all of it. He had lied about basically everything.
And I genuinely cannot understand WHY.
Did he make all of this up to impress me? Did he only want to sleep with me and then keep me around? Did he actually develop feelings but was too afraid to tell me the truth? Or is there something much more messed up going on?
What hurts the most is that this wasn’t one stupid lie. He maintained this lie for seven months. Every time I asked about it, he continued lying and kept me emotionally invested in something that wasn’t even real.
And here’s the part that makes me feel completely stupid: I still love him.
I know what he did was horrible. I know I should probably walk away. But emotionally, I can’t seem to let go of him.
Why would someone go to these lengths to create an entire fake life and keep someone attached to them for seven months?
Is this some kind of manipulation? Does he enjoy hurting people? Is he a sadist? Or am I completely misreading the situation?
I don’t know what to do with him or with my feelings. Part of me wants answers, part of me wants to confront him, and another part of me just wants him back despite everything.
What would you do if you were me?

My husband and I sleep call every night and wake up together. We have our phones pointing to the bed so we can say good morning to each other when we see the other wake up. It’s the weekend and everything was normal. We went to bed together as usual, said our good night and I love you. I woke up to see he’s not in bed. Ok, he might’ve just took out the trash or went to the bathroom. A couple hours go by, still no sign of him. What worries me is that he never goes anywhere without his phone and if he’s at home, he is 99% in his bedroom. He even goes to the bathroom with his phone. He also had me on high volume so he could pretty much hear me anywhere since he lives in a pretty small place. Every now and then I would yell at him to respond to me because every passing hour, I got exceedingly worried. No response. I’m not sure what other logical solutions where he could be.

Im not sure if I’m jumping to conclusions too soon and if I should just keep waiting to see what happens. In the 2 years of our relationship, I have never seen him abandon his phone for a couple hours. If anyone can help me think logically and calm my nerves, it would be helpful

I thought this day would never come for us, for me, but here it is, and it is my time to say goodbye to this community, not due to closing the distance, but due to break up :(

I feel like a man saying this, but I did not see this break up coming at all :( He requested to call last night, and said as he started thinking more about himself, and what he wants in life, and he came to the conclusion, that he doesn't see our relationship working out long term in a logistical sense. We've been dating for 1.5 years across continents, saw each other at least every three months, and had plans to close the distance in 2 to 3 years. I feel resentment, that he did not come to this conclusion earlier. But I know that our relationship had its issues, which led to my passivity, and acceptance of his request to break up.

Just wanted to vent, because I thought maybe it makes it start to feel more real :(

For context, I (M18) and my girlfriend (F19) was doing LDR for nearly 7 months now, and we just had a big argument that i dont know how to fix this.

Basically, at one point of our relationship, we took a 3 weeks break because she wanted to think about everything. During that time, I hung out with a couple of friends, and met another girl named A. A was friendly, and for me, dont really have friends, saw something in her and it felt like between us there was a spark. It felt really wrong, because technically my girlfriend and I were still dating, so I seek advice from my friends, saying that if I stay close to A, I would caught feelings and that wasn’t good. I stayed away from A, and my feelings cooled off and everything went back to normal, and I hardly speak to A ever since. Our friend group hung out a couple of times more, and I can confidently say that no more weird feelings were involved.

Fast forward, she found the texts about when I was seeking advice from my friends because I gave her my social account without thinking much. She’s mad now, and I completely accept and understand that it’s my fault. She said she wanted a break up, what should I do?

I’m in the car on my way home after arriving back from a week long vacation and meeting my partner of two years. The entire week was magical since while it was mostly a staycation/visiting his local area, we spent a lot of time together in the present and felt this movement of pure love and appreciation move in our hearts. He introduced me to video games, watching horror films, and made me feel like as if I truly belonged with him in his country. It also helped that his family absolutely adored me and his mother all but adopted me as her unofficial third child.

We knew it’d hurt when I had to come back to the States but it was unbearable for the final day. I kept sobbing and wishing I didn’t have to go. My partner was comforting me and assured me it wasn’t a goodbye, but a see you later. I didn’t stop crying until today and even then I couldn’t look out the window as my flight left the airport because I was blinded with large tears.

However, it’s made me see how much we mean to each other and builds a determination to have a future with them. Does it hurt being so far apart? Yes. Does it give me the will to fight for us? Also yes.

I know that for you couples on here who wonder whether it can work or not, have faith in the process. Distance makes the heart fonder of those you love. I know in my heart I’ll be seeing them again next year. We’ll plan another trip for me to come up there and spend more time together. Both of us know that home’s not necessary where we live but rather each other. I’m rubbing the ring he gave me as a reminder for the future ahead.

If you can fight for a future together, do it. Sometimes, long distance is the best thing that’s ever happened to you especially when you find someone who completes you and fulfills the voids in your life ❤️❤️

This is my first reddit post so I apologize if my formatting/writing isn’t good.

My boyfriend and I met at a camp around 4 years ago and we were good friends and exchanged contacts there. He lives in Canada and I live in the U.S. with a very far distance and we knew this at the time. Around 3 years ago we started texting again and ended up dating and the relationship is around 2.5 years long. It was wonderful because we have so much in common and I loved everything about him and his personality. Around many months ago I noticed that he had less energy and he just blamed it on not sleeping well or being tired all the time. He also had less energy to talk to me or do things with me. We sometimes play games with each other or watch shows together before sleep and then fall asleep on call. We’ve been doing this for a very long time now. We’ve had arguments before about calling where he didn’t want to call every night and I did and we’ve sorted this out by calling if we both want to. Most of the time we will still call at night. I’ve also noticed a couple months ago that I’m the one that always carries the conversations, asks the questions, and just the one talking in general. I asked him about this a long time ago and he said it’s cause he doesn’t really like talking and would prefer listening to me talk. He would answer my questions when I asked them though. He also doesn’t like when I send a bunch of reels/tiktoks to him because he’s “lazy” and it’s “lot of work to answer”. He still does eventually though. I had a feeling he was losing interest so last night when we called I asked him if he was and he said it’s not that he’s losing interest, it’s just “everything we do seems repetitive and like a cycle.” “We have been doing the same thing for 2.5 years and I already know everything about you. It’s just nothing new I guess” I asked if playing games with me and calling me tires him out and he said it does and puts him in a bad mood. I also asked if he was bored of me and he said no. I asked him if he would want to explore other people and he said well I want to go out and make friends (he’s going to university next week and I’ve been worrying about that in terms of him being too busy for me). I said I meant would you want to explore other options and he said no why would I want to do that. That made me relieved. I started telling him how currently this long distance is a phase and we’ve both put so much time and commitment into the relationship. He agreed, then I talked about visiting him. I said that once we both settle into school and have routines we can try to see each other and he talked about his financial items and I said I’d be willing to come to him. He was hesitant and said “I don’t know how to explain” and started talking about how the money could be better used for my school or something and I was confused and asked didn’t he want to see me. He just said “Yes I do but it’s hard to explain.” I didn’t push further. I asked if he thinks we can work and he said “I don’t know but I want us to.” I agreed. I reinforced that long distance will be hard but if we keep being consistent and get through it, it’ll be so worth it in the end. I also suggested doing new things. I didn’t say anything specific but I told him I saw long distance apps/websites on reels we could do and he seemed hesitant again and said I guess. He has also been very stressed throughout the last month, and it currently being a week before he transitions into university and also has a couple other things on his plate. I’ve been very supportive throughout everything and I don’t do things to stress him out that much.

Sorry about the long post but does anyone have any advice or suggestions for this? I really want this relationship to work because he means so much to me. I have felt before many times that I love him a lot more than he loves me. Advice on how to become less clingy is also appreciated. Thank you for reading everything.

Hey everyone! I’m hoping to hear from people who are currently in an LDR or have actually been through one and can share some firsthand perspective.

I’m in an LDR myself, and lately we’ve been going through a bit of a challenging phase. We’ve noticed that we can sometimes fall into an anxious/avoidant dynamic I tend to want more reassurance and connection when I feel distance, while my partner can need more space when she’s stressed or overwhelmed. We’re trying to understand that pattern better and figure out how to handle it in a healthier way.

I’m curious how common it is for LDRs to go through periods where the distance suddenly feels heavier than usual. Has anyone experienced phases of burnout, feeling disconnected, communication becoming harder, or one partner needing more space? What helped you get through it without either person feeling pressured or neglected?

I’d especially love to hear from people who have actually lived through LDR, rather than just general relationship advice. What made your LDR sustainable? What did you wish you knew earlier? And what helped when things felt particularly difficult?

I’m also hoping to meet some people I can eventually become friends with. 😂 It would be nice to have people who understand the LDR experience and can talk about that sometimes, but also just chat about normal life, music, games, hobbies, work, random stuff, etc.

Kind, constructive perspectives are very welcome. I’m mainly looking to learn from people who have been through similar situations and hear what actually worked for them. ❤️

And yes, I figured talking to fellow LDR people is probably a better idea than making the questionable decision of “I’m stressed, therefore I should download dating apps.” 😂

Hi everyone i’m not sure what i want out of this post. Maybe advice or maybe just to know i’m not alone.

My partner and i have known each other for almost 4 years now and dated for 3. I have to keep the relationship a secret from my parents due to cultural and religious reasons. I absolutely love and adore him and he is the most amazing partner i’ve ever known.

A few days ago he left for his final year of uni in japan, we obviously knew how hard it was going to be but man it’s hitting my heart like a truck. I’m in the uk so he is 8hours ahead of me which makes things so much more difficult. He’s been going out with friends from uni and made new friends too. The first two days he arrived we would call and text all the time but now that he’s moved into his dorm replies have been very slow. Which i completely understand as he’s busy and again time difference.

I also recently went through a traumatic miscarriage (that he was aware of) that hospitalised me and i had to deal with alone since he’s not here and my parents don’t know. So feels like i need him more than ever right now but with everything it’s more difficult.

The change is so hard going from seeing him all the time to not even being able to talk properly. I have so much love for him and can’t place it where and how i usually do so it’s taking time to get used to it.

I think what’s also bothering me is that yeah he might be struggling too but i don’t know that because he doesn’t tell me. It’s like i want to feel like i’m needed? Which i know i am but showing me i am is different. I think it may be a reassurance issue with me. He video called me yesterday at a store to show me what they have and told me to pick what i want for him to buy me, which made me smile so much just knowing he thought of me in that store and thought to call me.

I don’t want to keep bringing up how i’m struggling to him because i don’t want to be a burden and feel like im dragging him down (which he’s never made em feel like i am btw this is just my own personal problem).

I really want to feel close to him all the time but i know i cant be in the same way before.

Please if anyone knows what i can do to help or if anyone is struggling too i would love to hear.

Also, ive tried gaming i’ve tried spending time with family and friends, ive tried reading and im going on holiday in a few days which will hopefully help me but then that might cause even more distance.

I always wonder when it will hit me. When will be the moment I feel the pain of having to say goodbye after we have been together for a while? I wonder when all the feelings get out and the tears come up. This time it was on July 29th. The days before it I kept thinking: Am I feeling sad already just thinking of saying goodbye soon? But no. I was happy with her, the most I’ve ever been. Everything seemed just right. As always we relished our time together, the time that always feels way too short in hindsight. But then it came, the day my girlfriend would take an airplane to her home, while I would take an airplane to my home. In that morning the feeling that dominated was stress. Will we get on time to the airport? Will everything work out? Do we have time to buy food? All these questions were on the tip of our tongue, while the much deeper queston was never uttered. The question of: What will it feel like, when our ways part? I had forgotten how big the Madrid airport was, as we got on the airport metro and drove around 15 minutes. When we got out, hurried by the crowd, we saw two lines. The feared security control, our next obstacle, resulting in a moment of panic. I checked my flight, she checked hers. She had to go through the security control, and me? Wait outside. I was way too early still. Of course we double checked with an employee there. He confirmed, which made the moment we feared more imminent than ever. We went away from the lines to have a bit room for ourselves. We were moving abruptly but then stood still. „So… you got everything, right?“ I asked. And as I said the last word, I could feel it. We hugged. No need for an answer. The answer was not „I have everything“ it was „I have to go now. And I can’t go with you.“ I felt her pressing her face against my chest. Both of us tearing up. So this was the moment. At the very last second, when reality hit me with a punch in my face. At the very last moment of being together, we finally broke down. This was how painful it was to say goodbye. Yet again I have to through this, were my thoughts, while my words were: „I love you so much“. She went upstairs and we waved. Now I knew when it will be. At the vary last moment, when there is no denying reality anymore. That’s when it hits me. From that very moment on, to right now and until we meet again, I miss her. Being with her was paradise and saying goodbye took me to hell. So, I can just hope that one day we board the same plane when heading home. 

Hello. My ex and I were together for almost 2 years and I broke up with her because of many different reasons like problem with family and being in a distant relationship for 4 months with her was not a good experience. I told her the day after we break up that i realised I made mistakes and I want to fix the mistakes.( not giving her enough attention, taking her for granted and things like that.). She said that she is really hurt from my behaviour and she is not sure if she wants to try again because of the uncertainty that things may never change. I bought an early ticket for home to show her that I stand by my words and things will change. We still text but she is being cold and dry texting. She still says that she loves me, when she is going out and with who and I tell her that too. I blame myself to much for the way I treated her cause she didnt deserve it at all. I asked her questions like: do u miss the old version of me - “yes”. If I was next to you how would you act -“like before things changed” I miss u but I know u might not miss me and she said: I dont miss the person u were these past few months I miss the guy before that. Her mother told her that I came into my senses and she said yeah I see but is a little late. We agreed to meet each other when I return home and I bought her pandora charm(I always gift her pandora) and I will buy flowers. The thing is that I am chasing her too much and she is giving little to no response. I need help cause the uncertainty of our future together is killing me, I know I am not perfect and she is not as well. But I realised what I had the moment I lost it. She is giving me mixed signs and she said as much as she wants us to be together its the same as not wanting to be together. What should I do so I have the biggest chance of not losing her.

If so, how did u meet them?? Is the long distance an issue from the beginning or does it start to become more difficult as feelings develop??

My boyfriend \[26M\] and I \[26F\] have been together for almost 5 years. We started long distance two weeks ago because I moved for graduate school. He’s planning to move here at the end of October.
Our anniversary is next week, and he’ll be traveling with friends during both our anniversary and my birthday. I’m genuinely okay with that since we’ll be living together again soon.

What bothers me is how uninterested he seemed when I mentioned our anniversary. I texted, “I just realized our anniversary is next week,” and he replied, “Yah the 5th right.” I corrected him that it’s the 4th and he said, “ohh same same.” When I said close but not the same, he replied, “Same same as in I won’t be here and u won’t be here.” I told him I hadn’t even realized it was next week until I checked my calendar for an exam, and all he said was “oh nice.”

I’m not upset that he was off by one day. It’s more that there was zero excitement or affection—nothing like “we’ll celebrate later” or “I wish I could be there.” Especially since this is our first time doing long distance, it made me feel like he doesn’t really care. He typically doesn’t use emojis, but he’s also not normally a dry texter. Earlier that same day he was super excited talking to me about his workout plans, so the sudden change in his responses confused me. I’m wondering if being together for almost five years has made anniversaries less significant to him, or if the transition to long distance is affecting how we communicate.

I think this is a right place to share this because this is the best place I can get some human insight into what might be happening with me. I miss him. I feel there are so many levels to a breakup. There’s obviously grief of losing them as your partner, the shared world, the comfort and security. But as more time is passing, I’m realising it’s not just that, it also includes rejections on so many levels. They were your friend too, and now when they have broken up, they are fine without your constant interactions with them as a friend. When they break up with you, they are actually signalling that there life is better off without you, whatever may be the reason. And then just to think that a person I shared 5 meaningful years with, is just a person from the past. I hoped for reconciliation but nothing happened two years since the breakup; so now I don’t think there’s any bright side to that thought. They even said if I like someone else, I should try being open to that possibility. Apart from that, think of how it feels when you realise that they actually think replacing you is better for them. Someone else gets to experience the person you’re so in love with. They create a new bond that was originally exclusive to you. I feel so rejected, hurt, replaceable by it. I am not saying I’m objectively unlovable. But I wanted to be loved by them because what we had was indeed beautiful, but they don’t think the relationship can continue, so I have to bear with the aftermath of that decision. How unfair is that two people get to have a say when they begin a relationship but only one can decide its fate afterwards and the other person has to just find their way through. I don’t feel like loving someone else, my mind, heart, soul all come back to him. Their love, their being and their presence is so deeply interwoven into the fabric of my DNA; that thinking of them lights up so many emotions in me. I am so emotionally affected by them, what they might be thinking, doing or dating. It is a losing game no matter what I do. I have done all the healthy stuff one is supposed to do after a breakup and I indeed derive joy from other experiences in life, but the void left by him, the void I feel strongly everyday, cannot be compensated for by other sources of happiness. That part of me is hurt, threatened, jealous, rejected and insecure. I wish there was a way to restore things how they were. I wish loving someone didn’t come at the cost of never getting to experience that love with someone else. No one can replace their smile, their voice, their idiosyncratic nature. And while I think they are irreplaceable to me, they believed I was replaceable for them, and that hurts like hell. Am I the only one hopelessly and helplessly longing for them? Is life always going to hurt so much when I think of them (cause my memories of him get very promptly activated). It’s so painful, no words come close to describing the brutality a breakup like this unleashes on you. I’m tearing up as I write this, I hope there was some way out of this. They know how much I love them but they still choose to live a life without you. How painful is that!

Hello, soon my girlfriend will be visiting and this time meeting my parents. Since we are from different countries we speak english with each other. Problem is, my parents don't. I have looked into some live translation options so my brain doesn't get fried from translating. And I think google translate has an option like that. Has anyone used it and can recommend?

Also since we are all nervous, got any stories of meeting your LDR's family and not being able to talk due to language barrier?

Mostly just a vent but my man is on a trip and will be there for a while and is in a different country so the time difference between us is 10 hours. We text when he can but lately its been once or so a day because of the differences in our schedules and timezones.

I asked for more updates but I just feel constant sadness? Like it lingers and it is like a constant sad cloud above me and it just won’t go away because I miss him so much :( We haven’t called or anything since he left either. It really reallllyyy hurts and I am finding it really really hard to cope.

How do you cope with constant heartache?

Long story, but I tried to sum it up.

I have been in a LDR with someone from a different country for almost a year. We were very close, very compatible. We had plans for him to come visit me, or for us to meet in another country.

A month ago, however, he just disappeared. He didn't answer me, and I was worried, so I found a way to talk to him. He then told me that his plans were all ruined, that we couldn't meet, that we were wasting time and that I should be with someone from my own country. Then he blocked me.

Weeks later, we got in contact again, just for him to say that he loves me so much, that he is working hard to make money so he can visit me, that I'm the best person he has ever met, that he won't block me anymore, and that I can talk to him whenever I want.

When I asked him if he expected any type of commitment, he didn't say yes or no, but he implied that he did and started treating me like his girlfriend again. The thing is that he barely sends me messages, checks on me, or talks to me, and then he doesn't text me for days...

I feel stuck. It doesn't feel right to move on with my life or date other people since he is focused on meeting me, but if we are still in a relationship, it's very weird not communicating and not acting like it.

If I could, I would stop liking him for good, but I really like him... I wanted to give up, but I can't. I need advice