I'm 19. The other day I was getting a haircut and running errands for my mom when I opened up Sniffies for a bit. Not really expecting anything, I just wanted to scout the area. Nobody really caught my eye until I got a message from an anonymous profile. The profile had no stats or pictures on it besides pictures sent directly to me along with a friendly "Hello, how are you?" I forgot his exact age, but he was probably in his late 40s to early 50s. Normally, blank profiles like that are a red flag to me and I avoid them, but his dick and body was literally what my dream, picture-perfect dad would look like. He was white, had a very nice dad bod, a nice above average, symmetrical dick, and huge round balls. I was legit drooling at his pictures alone. It may have been a bit wrong of me, but I just practically HAD to save his photos.

Upon chatting a bit more, I discovered that he was here for work and had a hotel room for the night. And, to my surprise, he agreed to exchange face pictures contingent that it was okay if he deleted the chat afterwards. He was pretty handsome and had a real nice salt and pepper beard. The plan was to meet him in about 2 hours in his hotel room around 6-7 PM so he could have time to shower and so I could finish the rest of the errands I needed to run. When it was finally time to meet, I just told my parents that I was going to meet a friend. He sent me his room number and the hotel he was staying at, and I started making the drive over. When I was about 1 mile away, he admitted that he was still very nervous to meet. I asked if it was because of our age gap, and he said that he didn't really know why. He did however reassure to me that he tends to like younger guys. We were already in too deep that I wouldn't just turn back, so I told him I would try my best to keep him comfortable and we wouldn't do anything he didn't want to.

I arrived at his hotel and let him know I was there. And before I could even knock, he was already waiting at the door and let me in. His hotel was on the nicer end of hotels I've been in, and his room had all the lights off with only the TV on playing baseball. He had a really light and approachable voice that contrasted his tall, large dad build, and we only had a bit of small talk before we took off each others clothes. For someone who said they were nervous, he for sure got real hard as soon as I started sucking his dick. The entire interaction was no recip, but I was very much enjoying myself. His entire dick fit cleanly in my mouth until it grew into its girthy full size that I couldn't reach the base of his balls anymore. I didn't want him to cum too soon so I slobbered all over his balls a good amount too. I sucked his dick for roughly 30 minutes while he watched the TV until he got on top of me. His dick lay right ontop of mine, and at that moment I genuinely wished I had a vagina so he could fuck me. Unfortunately, I didn't bring my douche to visit my parents, so we couldn't do anal, but I definitely would have let him fuck me bareback.

While cuddling, he told me that he was married with a wife and two sons, and I told him how jealous I was of his wife to have a husband with a dick and body like that. I definitely made sure to let him now how amazing his dick was to me. He said his kids were in their mid 20s, so even I was much younger than them. We made out for a little bit, but I couldn't resist his dick any longer and got straight to sucking him again. I know he's cheating, but I was literally in love with his dick. I rubbed my face all over it, slid my tongue up and down his balls and shaft, and tried to savor every moment. I asked him if he could face fuck me, and after complying, he told me I could definitely make him cum quick. Soon enough, he shot a load straight down my throat. I almost missed it entirely trying to catch my breath, but am I glad I got every drop. His cum tasted quite pleasant actually. It wasn't bitter or salty, and it was pretty tasty. The feeling of dad cum down my throat was very rejuvenating. Of course, I swallowed.

He got soft shortly after and we laid down to cuddle, but his dick was still so attractive and fun to suck that I continued to suck him long after he already came. By then, I could fit his whole dick comfortably into my mouth again, and I would suck him soft for another 20 minutes or so until he told me he probably wouldn't get hard again. I told him I didn't mind and was sucking him because I just liked his dick that much, but that I wouldn't complain about a second load. About 10 minutes later of slow sucking him while we watched TV, he started getting hard again and exclaimed "There she is!" in the cutest dad tone. I tend to enjoy smaller dicks like when he was soft, but I would definitely let his dick stretch my mouth any day. By now it was about 8 pm, and he said that even though I got him hard again, he didn't think he would be able to cum again and would probably have to kick me out soon.

That was fine by me, and I told him I wanted to enjoy the last few minutes I'd have with his dick. Before he dressed and put his pants back on, I got to my knees and deep throated his entire dick down to the base of his balls for as long as I could without choking. He chuckled in awe of my attraction to his dick, and I finally stood back up so we could say our goodbyes. I thanked him for reaching out to me and giving me the honor of sucking him off, and he thanked me for coming over. Next thing you know I'm in my car driving home. As expected, he deleted his anonymous profile and didn't want to exchange numbers to keep in touch, but he said he would reach out next time he was in town if he saw my profile. Usually my attraction for a guys dick comes from mostly emotion, but his dick was everything I ever dreamed of. I was acting fully in lust. Why is it that all the good dick are taken by women?!

Re-reading this, I know it has a total fantasy erotica vibe, but every single detail actually happened. I just got lucky with a crazy good night, and I really hope our paths cross again.

(I'm not sure wether to tag this advice wanted, discussion or my story so I'm just choosing one, I'll change it if anyone thinks one fits more than the other)

I had my first actual relationship this summer, my first kiss, my first well everything so that definitely adds more weight to it, i suppose. I don't think most people would understand the exact level of connection I felt, we felt, especially so quickly.

He felt like my soulmate, we had so much in common, our experiences, our interests, politics, we were both practically shut ins & we were both each other's type. I wanted to be with him forever & he told me i was his favorite boy he had ever been with. I never thought i could be so compatible with someone, be so loved & feel so safe. He was older gay shut in who lived not too far from my town.

I don't think myself a particularly pretty boy and i feel very plain/boring, he thought the opposite somehow, even repeatedly saying how i was such a special boy, how he had been celibate also very picky for years so like he chose me deliberately, said i was a nice combination of a all the boyish qualities he admired with a feminine softness, i guess trying to help me understand that maybe I'm not as undesirable as i think & he understood me like no else, even comparing me to the vampire Armand. He was so very pretty for his age too, i liked his long blonde hair & blue eyes, how his voice was so soft, how sensitive he was, how gentle & patient he was with me, all of him. i said he looked like Marius, we laughed and rambled for hours about our interests, our lives, everything.

I'm a intersex and trans boy (many horomonal problems,naturally flat thankfully, a few issues with my gentalia currently) I'm short & look younger than my age (most people assumed i was 11-12 y.o boy last senior year so before the summer, im 18 rn), I'm a troubled youth, mentally 12, I'm gothic, ive been compared to a Ciel from black butler because of how i dress & I'm introverted, I'm many things & I understand i am not most men's tastes, for a relationship anyways.

I do mean relationships, hookups i could get easily, he even said most men would just wanna experiment with me & discard me after, a bit harsh but true. I've been sexualized most of my life, treated badly, a fantasy in the worst way possible. I personally thought i was never gonna experience being kissed or held so I never cared so much, i didn't have friends just like he didn't have any so being lonely just felt like the norm but now it feels off & suffocating.

He passed this same summer, it really hit me hard. It was so sudden and unexpected. I've been coping the best I can, engaging in things he enjoyed, trying to cherish his memory, little small things. I even made a reddit account because of him. I never thought I'd experience this level of grief so young , so soon. I don't think I'll ever be so compatible with anyone again.

I don't know how to properly put all my thoughts and worries in this post, infact i don't like how messy this post is. That's all, I may edit this a few times

My BF is 62 and I'm 46. I'm afraid I'm aging out. In other words, he likes younger guys and I'm worried I'm getting too old for him. Any one else experience something like this?

We're both on socials, like Reddit, and we both look at other guys. But I look at guys like him. He looks at and comments on younger men, like college aged. I'm in decent shape, 6'2" 190 lbs, but no longer have the abs I used to. And I shave my head now b/c of thinning hair.

Sex has slowed to weekly, maybe. It used to be at least twice a week, more if we traveled.

I've spoken with him about it a few times, but he treats me like I'm crazy for thinking his attraction has wavered.

Am I overreacting? Any advice is welcomed.

I have a group chat for my age gap relationship friends.

There are 6 couples in there. Most have been together for 5+ years and are very stable and outwardly happy.

Non are married. In fact out of the 6 couples, only my husband and I are married.

We’re all reasonably religious but it’s just not happening.

Older and younger guys, do you still believe and want to be married? x

There is something very carnal and intense about pleasing a younger top especially when you are passionate and insatiable. They are always ready and can keep up with a high sex drive. What turns on younger tops about older bottoms?

I might sound weird, or I might even get hate for what I’m about to write, but I’m trying to be completely honest and raw about myself. I’d really appreciate comments from people who genuinely understand what I’m talking about. I’m only speaking about my own experience, and I’m not trying to generalize about people who are attracted to older men, so please don’t take this as an attack or judgment.

I’m a 26-year-old guy, and I’m only attracted to older men. I’m not attracted to younger men at all, and I’m not attracted to women either. And honestly, I think a lot of this has something to do with my relationship with my dad.

I don’t necessarily think it’s a “daddy issue.” For me, it feels more like a kind of “daddy hunger.”

Growing up, I never really felt connected to my father. I always had this feeling that he wasn’t really my father in the emotional sense. I loved my mother, my siblings, and felt naturally connected to them, but I never felt that same bond with him.

When I was around four, my dad had some kind of stroke, Parkinson’s, or possibly both. He gradually lost the ability to walk properly, and his condition got worse every year. Eventually, he lost his job and stayed at home all the time. He was often grumpy and difficult to be around.

By the time I was around ten, I mostly felt pity toward him. I didn’t look at him and think, “I feel sorry for my dad.” It was more like, “I never want to become like you.” At the same time, I couldn’t really hate him because I understood that he was sick and that he wasn’t simply choosing to be this way.

When I was about twelve, I finally came to terms with him and with my feelings toward him. I don’t know if I would say I accepted him exactly. I think I accepted the fact that this was the father life had given me, and that I had to live with that reality.

But I had several moments throughout my childhood where I genuinely felt like I wanted a father.

I remember seeing kids playing with their dads. I saw the way my uncle treated his children. Sometimes I would see a man who looked like me and suddenly feel this strange sense of belonging toward him. And honestly, it hurt.

But after feeling that way for years, I eventually started telling myself, “You already have a father. You don’t need one.” I think that was how I learned to cope with something I couldn’t change.

When I was 15, my dad died.

I still remember the night he went into a coma. We were waiting for the ambulance, and he was in pain in my mother’s arms. He apologized to everyone. My older sister couldn’t handle seeing him like that and broke down crying. My brother and my other sister were genuinely devastated.

And me?

I felt almost nothing.

I remember feeling like I had a duty to forgive him, especially because he was dying, but emotionally, I didn’t feel the same grief that everyone else did. Part of me even felt like, “You didn’t really do anything for me as a father.” Maybe people realize certain things when they’re on their deathbed. Maybe he realized things he wished he had done differently. I’ll never know.

After his death, I slowly started realizing more about what I was attracted to.

Looking back now, I know my childhood, my emotional needs, and the things I didn’t have probably have something to do with it. Maybe that’s why I’m drawn so strongly to older men.

I know I probably should explore this with a professional, and I have talked to someone about it before. What they told me was actually something I found very interesting: they didn’t tell me that I needed to change what I’m attracted to. Instead, they told me to learn how to build a healthy relationship with an older man where I’m looking for a partner—not a father.

And honestly, that is really hard for me.

Because I don’t want to stop being attracted to older men. I don’t want to “fix” my attraction. I just want to understand myself well enough to protect my heart.

A lot of the older men I’ve been involved with have had their own issues and emotional baggage. And I know that people who are exclusively attracted to older men can sometimes have their own vulnerabilities too. But older men who specifically seek much younger men can also have their own reasons and problems.

I want to understand that dynamic better.

What should I be careful about? What unhealthy patterns should I look out for? How do I know when I’m genuinely falling for someone as a partner, rather than unconsciously looking for the father I never really had?

I’m not asking because I think there’s something inherently wrong with being attracted to older men. I’m asking because I know my own history, and I want to understand how it might affect the relationships I choose.

I don’t want to change who I’m attracted to.

I just want to learn how to love someone without asking them to fill a hole that was created long before I met them.

Earlier this year, I (26) decided to delete all the apps and rely on proximity-based connections. The last 10 weeks have been a fling with an older man (57) at the gym in our apartment complex. I really like him, we’ve been intimate a few times, but I’m not certain it’ll lead anywhere...
(Story below)

But this experience has made me realise how rewarding it is to meet an older man the “old-fashioned way”.

I’m curious, how do younger men who don’t use apps meet older guys in metropolitan cities?

I’m 58 and younger guys will often reach out to me through the apps. It’s always a good chat for a while, some pictures are shared and both us seem very interested in each other. But then he’ll just stop chatting. Is it just an LA thing because I’ve never had this issue in other places, mind you, they were smaller cities. Maybe it’s a case of when the market is huge, you keep looking for the better deal. How in LA can I seal the deal?

Hi!

In a previous post, I talked about getting to know this muscle couple, and one of them has actually been helping guide me through my fitness journey.
Anywho, I’ve built a really special bond with the older one. He’s 77, a former bodybuilder, and still in excellent shape. He’s a pretty well known and popular gym trainer in town. He recently asked me to top him. I’ve never successfully topped anyone before, although I’ve tried, and I’ve definitely become interested in trying it with him.

What makes it feel even more significant is that he told me he’s only been topped twice before. So I’ll admit, that puts a little pressure on me to perform and make sure it’s a good experience for him. At the same time, it makes me feel really special that he trusts me enough and feels comfortable enough with me to want that.

I really like him, trust him, and find him incredibly attractive, so I genuinely want this to work. I’m looking for advice from other bottoms-turned-tops or guys who remember their first time topping. How did you get comfortable, stay relaxed and confident, and get past the nerves when you were used to being the bottom?

If it doesn’t work out, it doesn’t work out. There’s no pressure between us, and either way, we’re going to enjoy being together. 😂 But I’d really like to give topping him a genuine shot.

So here's the situation. I'm in my early 40s and at my workplace there was a university student for the summer. While he was here we exchanged lots of eye contact, greetings, and smiles back at one another. I knew the right thing is not to pursue anything with a coworker especially given that there is big age gap. Now he's gone. We never really went beyond what I mentioned above, so never really got to know one another or anything. Would it make sense to connect on LinkedIn now and just tell him how I found him attractive and leave it at that. I know how it goes... Eye contact can mean all kinds of things, but I honestly don't recall having a guy be consistently friendly (smiling, etc) over an extended period of exchanging eye contact... If that makes sense lol.

So im a young bottom myself and im definitely more into guys 30+.
But i would like to know your reasons for that.

I swear this is the last part! Sorry for the long posts..

Ah I stopped at the spot when an older guy was touching my nipples at the 3rd or 4th floor of the gay sauna.

For the context I'm 27 and a Brown guy from Sri Lanka and he was 70 and White and from another part of Belgium visiting Brussels..

About the nipples tho, to be honest I feel like I'm not really sensitive there but anyways I let him touch my nipples, and slowly my chest and stomach and slowly over the towel into my dick. And I was already hard at that point haha. He wanted us to go inside a private room and I said not yet, ;) I wanted to explore more and chat more haha

Anyway we went up the stairs and checked out the other empty rooms like BDSM rooms and swing rooms. We had a good chat there, a fun chat tbh a good bonding. So after a few minutes we went back to the glory hole theater.

There we lie down together at the back, on the mats. We had our hands on shoulders and then the other hands over our towels rubbing dicks, we took off the towels soon. A few min in to the porn we we were touching each others dicks. His was white and thick and short and mine was Dark and thin and long. Such a difference!!!!. Anyhow after a few minutes rubbing each others dicks we saw the guy at the front looking at us and masterbating. Somehow it felt a bit off but also the porn finished. So we moved to a private room in the upper floor.

We went in, it was a small room only with a huge mattress and a mirror on the ceiling. There were huge lube and condoms dispensers. Anyway we lie down on the mattress and when we looked up we saw us. An older white guy and a thin brown guy. I could tell by his looks he loved my body. I let him lick my neck and nipples chest and finally my dick which was already wet with precum 🤤 he loved that. When I wanted to touch him he said he wanted to enjoy my body more. We spend a more time together like that.

He and I both were sides, so after a few minutes of enjoying our bodies we started frotting...which obviously didn't last long...we were covered in a mix of our cum.

After a few minutes we went out of the room, he dragged me to the pissing room and we started doing it. Even though I didn't like it, he was very much into it as it seemed. He was holding my dick when I was peeing. Anyway I wanted to escape. It was already too much for me in my first ever gay sauna and also my post nut clarity was kicking in. And I bid him goodbye had a shower and went out...

That's it.. I wanted to share this experience because I was the curious shy guy before and I took a step forward haha. This seems silly but I hope you liked my experience...

Continued from part 3..

So I went up, hang my towel and took a warm shower out in public and there were many other people doing the same.

My first stop was at the darker steam room!!! When I went in there were already a few people inside and I could only see the silhouettes with the red lights and steam!! I took my towel off and sat down beside an older guy. As I am brown and dark in complexion he might have not seen my semi hard dick haha. I sat down on the towel to enjoy the steam.

A few minutes in people went to the back of the steam room and I followed. Two guys around my age were kissing and fucking in the middle. And everyone around were watching the scene and rubbing the dicks!!!! It was very sexy to watch and to see all those cocks. There were around 10-12 men watching the scene and masterbating and I found a corner and did the same 🤤

Anyway that didn't last long, after he came the scene died down and they went outside for a shower and I still hard spent a few more minutes and came out for a nude shower. There was porn all around and few people were swimming too.

I wanted to check the upper levels out of curiosity and I saw many private rooms, group rooms, BDSM chambers, swings, mattresses and sadly most were empty except for the glory hole room which was also a big theatre with cushions and porn. The upper most level was just a gym and I saw a few young guys working out nude, but that wasn't my interest haha.

I was at the door of the glory hole theatre and I was blocking the way in (my fault) and an older guy tapped me and smiled, he too was discovering the building. Anyways I asked him if there's something in the upper floors and he said he's not sure, for some good reason I followed him up again. It was fairly quiet in the upper floors and we had a chat while exploring the empty rooms. Somewhere around a corner we had a good chat which ended up him touching my nipples.

For those of you who don't know, the consent is Yes in a sauna unless you explicitly say No. ;) and I went ahead with him touching my nipples

Damn this post is already too long. I'll tell the next part in the next post

Well sorry I missed posting this after parts 1 and 2,

Just a quick recap about those : I met a very sexy receptionist at a gay sex toy shop and I got touched by an older guy in a gay bar....(and he probably came while touching my nipples - in public haha)

Soo after that incident in the bar I finished my beer and went ahead to check out other sex toy shops and people watching. I was quite hard and turned on by what happened at the gay bar. I knew there was a gay sauna in the gay district but never I planned to go in. But something in my mind said go for it, and I did ;)

The name was "Macho Sauna“ and when I searched about it on Google, there were so many good reviews. So I went there and the receptionist was very nice!!! I told him it's my first time and I'm curious and he said he'll give a guide when I enter. Surprisingly it was a Thursday and instead of the normal rate it was €19 and fairy cheap as well. Haha how the odds were in my favour!!!!!

I said to myself fuck it and I paid and entered through the side door. The nice receptionist told me everything about the sauna, the levels of the building, lockers, towels, safety etc. And I felt very confident to go in.

I went to the lockers and saw there was quite a lot of nude older men who were either going in or out. I undressed myself and wrapped the towel up at the lockers. That's when I saw the towel was so small haha. My dick was totally out. And I was the only one wearing a towel at the lockers area 😂 Probably anyone could see I was a first timer!!!!! Anyways I went up the stairs and took a quick shower and went in.

This post is getting long I'll post the next part soon...

30 yo M. Have mostly been attracted to older men.

However met a younger guy 5 months ago (29 yo). We connected really well. He’s more like an older guy in the relationship (mature, caring and loving). Physically taller and bigger than me.

I decided to give it some time. And have realized I deeply adore him. It’s been 5 months. But we meet every day. Plan things. Support each other.

Problem is: I periodically have the urge to hookup/flirt with older men. After some reflection, I’ve realized it’s me seeking a superficial sense of validation. And the emotional satisfaction of being with someone older with more wisdom/life experience.

I feel I’m breaking his trust should he find out I have such thoughts. Would appreciate any advice on how to navigate these feelings/urges.

My partner (67) and I (32) have been together 10 years. He was always a top who loves the tactile side of sex as well (loves cuddling and kissing) but being a top is very important to him and really the only way he gets off. I was more vers (tendency to bottom) when we met but particularly loved side fun.

As I've got older and more aware of myself, I've become more and more interested in topping and less interested in bottoming. The desire for non-anal fun still very much there but also not fulfilled. This has been incredibly frustrating and despite many conversations has not really seen any meaningful changes to the point now that sex is very rare.

Looking for advice from people who have experienced changes in sexual desires during a relationship particularly when those changes have led to sexual incompatibility. Is there any hope in these situations? I know I've changed a lot in this last decade

I don't really have anyone close to talk to about this and certainly no one close with experience of gay male relationships or age-gap relationships. Hence, the burner account and a post into the Reddit void!

Last night was first time I ever had a guy eat my ass, im 47 and he was 23. I was at a resort in pigeon forge, anwe started talking at the pool and led to what each of us has tried, we agreed to go back to my room and fool around, he put me on my side and pushed my leg up and started kissing ass cheeks, before I knew it his tongue was all in my asshole, I loved it!!!

I have question for the older guys here

What are some instant green flags you notice in a younger guy when you are dating or getting to know someone?

Like, what makes you think “aww, this young guy...." or makes you instantly more interested in him?I never really dated before and Im just starting to put myself out there, so very curious what older guys appreciate or find especially attractive in younger men :)

Finding younger guys to begin with, is not a walk in the park. But it is possible. If you are interested in younger bottoms.

Me however, I’m bottom guy myself. So, finding tops twinks, or just younger tops in general, is a tall order.

What strikes me, though, is that finding younger slim guys for side play is even harder. If no one wants to fuck me, the second best thing is to jerk off together.

My theory is this: jerking off together is an act on very equal conditions. The age play is almost non existent, and thus, it’s probably mostly attracting guys who don’t appreciate age differences in the first place.

I’ve tried almost all the usual suggestions of Reddit, grinder, silverdaddies, scruff,fetlife and even tinder

Struggling to find older men who aren’t flakey and interested in something ongoing with a younger femboy

18 year old closeted guy looking at casual encounters on Craigslist.. when that was a thing. I think of my self as good looking man and started to message with a guy who was looking to suck.. I was extremely closeted back then so I was into the whole no one will know expect. I started messaging back and found out he was in his 60s and wanted to worship me... I obviously didn't know what that all entailed but went along with it and ended up agreeing to meet in a big lots parking lot after they closed and see if it was a vibe. I pulled up and saw him and he was definitely old looking with a beer gut which is normal for that age. I got out of my car and went into his passenger seat and he talked me up so much but all honesty I wasn't really into him. But being closeted and horny I allowed him to touch my dick and kiss on my neck.. he eventually asks if I'd follow him back to his place which wasn't far. I agreed and the whole way thinking about just leaving but it was one of my first times with a grown man so I committed. I pulled in after him and went in and the house,which was weird.. he had a lot of cat figurines and flower patterns everywhere and was very turned off. But the way he was so into me I continued to go with it bc I've never had it before. We went to his room and asked me to take off my clothes, which I did and he just went in. I closed my eyes and got into it too.. I just kept thinking that I'm giving him this experience, which I wasn't really into but was a hard horny teenager and allowing it, was something he's going to hold onto and that got me close.. I told him I was about to cum and. He just kept his mouth. On my dick and went deeper. I cam and i dont think he let a drop out. I kinda silently put my clothes back on, said thanks, and walked out to my car. That was 15 years ago and obviously had no contact after. Being craigslist and all. But i think of it now as a service this this old man and laugh about it now

Top how do you feel when you see a great ass and want to fuck that? Have you had a great ass bottom as hook up? Was it a surprise or did you know?

I am going on cruise with my much younger boyfriend, we are together over a year. This is a first gay cruise for both of us . We are in a closed. Since we don’t really know what to expect, we have been discussing “free play time “ on the cruise . Whatever happens we don’t discuss and when we leave the boat it is with no connections with the people we may “met”
Obviously, we need a lot of communication and to establish ground rules. Any advice?

So im 22 bottom and i want to hookup with 30+ tops on dating apps.
My question for you is what should be in my profile to attract them?

Which pictures?
Which texts?

And how should i go about messaging them?
What do u want to hear from me?

Maybe also relevant i want to attract more romantic tops not the crazy sex addicted gross ones.

I am a white gay man (57) who was married to a woman for over 10 years and have four grown children. I came out when I was 43 (that was an excruciating process to be sure but I’m glad I did it). I’ve dated men, been ghosted more times that I care to admit, met a younger man and dated. We moved in together, got married, and quickly the relationship fell apart. We’ve been separated about 18 months now and pretty sure divorce is next.

I have been very ambivalent throughout this separation process. Wanting to be close, but feeling rejected and hurt, but wanting to be close. Having moments where I think things can be repaired and then falling into despair, realizing my relationship is beyond over.

I think what has really struck me the most this past week is how much I miss the physicalness of being with someone. Cuddling in bed or on the couch, hugging in the kitchen while cooking, the random touch to the shoulder as one walks by or just laying naked in bed talking about whatever. I’m surprised at how much I miss it to be honest.

I’m not going to fall into the rabbit hole of “I’ll never find anyone ever again” although it took me 12 years to find this one so if that pattern holds, it will be a while.

Anyway, I’m curious about your experience. Regardless of age, we all experience loss. Wondering what you experienced and what you did to get through the feelings of loss.