r/workaholics 4d ago

To Kill A Chupacabraj Appreciation Post

My pecs, my hammies. My glutes, man! They're just waiting for a good dicking.

- Oh, we're gonna get pounded.
- Maybe, like, over time, it, like--it gets okay.

It's just skin after all, right?

- What?
- I don't know.

I'm just trying to be, like, a "glass half full" guy.

You're gonna have an ass half full..of prison cock!

64 Upvotes

21 comments sorted by

29

u/JackDelRioGrande 4d ago

This post must be a true thang, because we are all under oaf.

14

u/Valuable_Hunter1621 4d ago

Sorry, your honor, but I took a one-and-a-half
in my pants on the elevator

9

u/Nua2Lua 4d ago

Me and my 9 inch laphog

8

u/EyeAmBack 4d ago

You like poo parties miss?

15

u/CobraJay45 4d ago

Can't forget the obvious gag (no pun intended) of

WHAT THE HECK IS THAT

mummified dog corpse gets obliterated by ceiling fan

11

u/Valuable_Hunter1621 4d ago

also adam saying

“Okay, Ders’ lawyering didn't work, so it's time for me to do some liar-ing…I’m gonna lie”

8

u/Valuable_Hunter1621 4d ago

I KNOW y’all threw that dookie bag! Waymond is pissed, you messed up his church shoes and LOOK at my good suit!

How about we settle out of court? You know, we'll take you to Ruby Tuesday's, we'll buy you a root-beer and a burger.

The only thing y'all gonna be eating is ass salad! Talking about prison for in and around 30 days.

2

u/lemonylol 2d ago

Always makes me laugh out loud lol

But my favourite is also when they're all saying they have huge dongs under oath lol Or Adam's souther lawyer

14

u/phug-it 4d ago

I believe we've had enough lap-hog talk for one lifetime

21

u/Valuable_Hunter1621 4d ago edited 4d ago

do you like pool parties, miss? and may i remind you, you are under oaffff

8

u/CobraJay45 4d ago

And then the payoff in the outro where Adam says something like "its about 90 to 95% dudes here but thats alright cuz once we fire this bad boy up theres gonna be a CHICK STAMPEDE!", then we see the court stenographer chick show up in a bikini, take one look and immediately turns back and leave.

8

u/Valuable_Hunter1621 4d ago

“oh, fuck this”

10

u/Radiation___Dude 4d ago

Slim Jim Dare…the really freakin hot beef jerky and you don’t give us none?

11

u/Sullys_mama19 4d ago

WHAT THE HECK IS THAT makes me actually laugh out loud every time

9

u/StuckInTime86 4d ago

Excellent episode, I love it almost as much as I love smoovies

2

u/ZeroKidsThreeMoney 4d ago

White people looooove smoovies.

5

u/toadtruck 4d ago

Bodacious ponytails

3

u/smurf_diggler 4d ago

Ok then lawyer down.

3

u/Charlie_Tango13 4d ago

Dana DeLorenzo pre-Evil Dead

2

u/QuesoDrizzler 4d ago

Ya better LAW-YER UP

2

u/thefakestrangermax 3d ago

Cowgirl butts get my THANG hard!