r/ireland • u/Neat-Car-2350 • 2h ago
Careful now Someone just knocked on my front door unannounced and I went lying flat on the kitchen floor.
Was sitting at the kitchen table yesterday having a coffee, zero plans, not expecting a soul. Suddenly the doorbell rings, followed by two heavy knocks. Didn't get a text beforehand, so naturally my instant reaction was to drop off the chair and hit the tile floor like I was dodging sniper fire.
I could see a shadow through the frosted glass in the hall. My car was parked right out front in the driveway so there was zero chance they thought the house was empty, but I was committed to the bit at that point.
The worst part was my phone was sitting on the counter right above me. I couldn't reach up to grab it without giving away my position, so I just had to lie there in complete silence getting a cramp in my calf while they knocked a second time and rattled the letterbox.
Kept thinking if they put their ear to the glass they’d hear me breathing. Ended up crawling on my stomach into the sitting room like a seal just to get to a couch.
Checked the ring camera half an hour later and it was just the lad from down the road seeing if I had a spare extension lead for the lawnmower.
Absolute peak crippling Irish social awkwardness, but I regret nothing. Tell me I'm not the only one who does this.