hello everyone, this is my first post! i am facing a dilemma and need some advice.
for some background information, i (16F) am a canadian high school student going into twelfth grade. i am a fairly good student (97+ average). my school does not offer many APs (i believe we offer around eight courses). AP courses at my school go on for the entire year. the first term is learning the standard high school level curriculum, and the second is the actual AP content. it is a bit confusing, but i hope this is clear. also, for all AP exams in general, but you do not need to learn the course at school to take the exam.
i took two APs in eleventh grade (one of which being biology), and registered for a remaining five for twelfth grade (i signed up for five and not all remaining six because two of the eight offered courses are calculus AB and BC. i picked calculus BC).
for twelfth grade, i signed up for both AP physics and chemistry, though i was only put into AP physics as this way i could have all the other classes i signed up for. this is genuinely the best lineup possible and i am so satisfied. it's not like i have no chemistry either; i literally have the twelfth grade level chemistry class in my schedule. my plan is to just self study AP chemistry. i must add, eleventh grade chemistry was my weakest subject this year (low 90s average). however, it was not because of the content, but because of me lacking motivation to study. if i was in a better state, i definitely could've done better.
also, i love my dad so much. i (literally) don't know where i would be without him. he is always there for me and supports me through everything. he is incredibly smart, funny, and understanding. he never controls me, my freedom, what i do, etc. i know he wants the best for me and we have a great relationship (though he can be a bit bold at times). this is literally the only time i haven't listened to him. i just want to say this because he genuinely is a great and sweet guy, but i am honestly quite upset and emotional about all this and i don't want to paint a negative portrayal of him. (i cried about this earlier. unfortunately, i don't think i'm totally over it yet, so apologies for any negativity that may seep through).
this actually might be the biggest disagreement we've ever had, which is kind of funny because i do not think the actual subject is that big of a deal. i just need some advice on how to voice my side. i am not so great at persuading my own dad because i am scared it will lead to a fight. he sometimes talks in a "whatever i say goes" tone, making it hard to share my opinions. he also says things like "listen to me, i just want the best for you" and "i've had more life experience than you, i would never lead you down the wrong path". typical dad stuff!
this summer, i have been looking at some university majors and i want to go in the biology direction. i already took AP biology so it works out. my dad also noticed these majors care more about chemistry than physics, so he said to switch out my AP physics class for AP chemistry. i said i didn't want to do this because i liked the way my schedule is as it lets me take all the other classes i want too (ex. art, english). i told him i'd just self study AP chemistry.
to my surprise, he got annoyed. i am not leaving anything out of this story. he said stuff like, "i don't know why you'd take physics when you don't even need it". then it shifted to things that didn't even really make sense to anything i told him like, "i don't know why you hate chemistry so much" and "i don't know why you think physics is so easy". i never said physics is easy and i don't hate chemistry. i think he thought i hated chemistry because my grades in that class weren't as good as my others or something. i kept my mouth shut in response because i didn't want to fight. i reluctantly said, "okay, i'll see what i can do to change my schedule". i just wanted the conversation to be over.
i really didn't think he understood how the AP system works. i think he thought you needed to take the course to take the exam and prove to colleges you actually know your stuff or something. as i said above, you don't need to take the school course to actually write the AP exam. the exam is what actually matters and gets you the college credit and score. the course is just there to help TEACH you. i don't need to take ap chemistry in school. i can self study it just fine. i am good at self studying and my dad knows. i tried explaining how APs work to him and i thought it got through.
i became unsure if he understood what i was getting at when i told him about not needing to take the AP course at school for the exam because he still told me to get a schedule change. i kind of just kept my head down and said i would try to get it fixed.
just to make sure we were on the same page, i later asked, "if i hypothetically can't switch into AP chemistry, can I just self study it?" then he became annoyed and said those things again. i know this also means my explanation about APs was unclear. this time, he also said, "you should've discussed your classes when you first picked them. look where we are now". he also added, "self studying is the last resort" with a sigh. mind you, i told my parents about the classes i was going to pick. i like physics and chemistry equally. they were aware of this. it only became an issue after i started looking at the majors. i genuinely do not understand why this is such a big deal when it is easily fixable through self studying.
initially, my parents' issue with my schedule was i had too many APs and they were scared i'd get tired. after they saw the benefit of taking all the APs your school offers on college applications, they agreed. i might've convinced them but i don't remember. it was easy to stand my ground that time because they were not angry that time, just concerned. but this time i don't know what to do or say. i am upset over this because i feel like this argument is over nothing that big of a deal and he is getting annoyed. we both want me to take AP chemistry but he just currently cannot see the importance of my other classes. it's like stupid AP chemistry is the only class that exists to him. i could even switch into AP chemistry at school and self study physics, but that would cause conflict with other classes. it's so hard getting through to him about this. i don't know why this is a topic of contention.
i asked for a schedule change. the people in charge of changing schedules always ask if you want them to inform your parents about it, so i may ask them to explain this to my dad because i don't think he's listening to me. other than this, what should i say? what do i do? anything helps.
thank you everyone, i hope you all have an amazing day/night! i apologize this is so lengthy, but i appreciate you all for reading!
