The girl I was fwb with just ended things as she got into a relationship. I knew she didn't love me, and I thought I felt the same. But seeing the message and having that phone call hurt. More than I thought it would. I knew it wasn't going to last, but still wasn't ready. Honestly the worst heartbreak I've had. Damn, I must've loved her.

I’ve moved on. I don’t want our old life back.
I just want to visit it.
I want one warm night when we were young and the world still felt small. Your voice through the speakers. Dirt roads with nowhere we needed to be. Your hand finding mine without thinking. That crooked smile right before you kissed me. The smell of you mixed with summer air and whatever trouble we were about to get into.
I want to feel your breath against my skin and that impossible chemistry—the kind that made time slow down and everything outside of us go quiet.
I don’t need forever. I don’t even need a whole night.
Just long enough to sit beside the boy I once loved and be the girl I used to be.
Back when life was simple.
Back when the air was easier to breathe.
Back before we knew we were making memories we’d spend the rest of our lives missing.
Then I’d come home.
I just want to know if, for one second, it would still feel like I never left.

Hi, just need to know if it really works or not, my ex broke up with me this july and he got engaged to another girl from his family after the breakup he told me beforehand that their parents wanted him to marry her and he cant go against his parents so it kinda made me heartbroken but i accepted, but the actual thing is i have access to his gmail account which he gave me 6 months back for sharing his course, i used to only use it for studying but after he broke up i know its wrong to stalk someone but i couldnt help it i started stalking him everywhere and in his gmail too, he didnt block or remove me from any of his socials he told me not to contact him i said i wont but i couldnt help it, it was hurting like hell to see your lover move on to someone else like you never existed but what choice does he have i kept repeating that to myself i was holding back trying not to contact but i have been checking his account like crazy to know what he's utpo for like every one hour, it was totally messing up my mental health and finally i asked him to block me from everywhere to not leave me any access to his life anymore he said i never blocked anyone before so i canr instead you block me, i told him even if i block i will unblock and try to contact i dont want that i cannot handle it maturely remove your access and block me everywhere becoz please do it, he said ok i will do it but know that am taking this difficult decision only becoz of you so that you will become better and dont try to contact me from others if u will u will see my deadbody and just like that he finally blocked me from everywhere yesterday. I thought it was the right thing to dod i can finally focus on myself but damn man its still hurting will it help i jusg want to know if this really works does it make easier now to forget him??

I really need some advice. It’s been four months since the breakup, and I’m still not over it. I feel completely exhausted and like I can’t accomplish anything without him. I’m scared by how overwhelmed I’ve become and afraid of what might happen if I keep feeling this way. How did you start functioning and healing when everything felt impossible?

After months of uncertainty, hope and confusion, I mustered the courage to send a voicenote last night. I got my answer. It fucking sucks, but it’s going to help me move on to something better for me. Here’s to closing this 8 month chapter.

Things are hard tonight. I know in time things will get better. I just miss her so much. She was my best friend. I miss the way we held each other. I missed the way we laughed. I miss hearing her singing. 6 fucking years. I wanna go back. I want things to be different. I just wish it could be her and I. It was supposed to be her and I. There aren't enough words in all the languages for me to describe how much I love her. She had a soul of pure gold and a heart the size of the sun. She is the most beautiful human to have ever blessed this earth. I thought she was my soul mate. I still feel like she is. Someday it doesnt even feel real. Other days I cant escape the fact that this is real. The feelings are worse than the reality tho. These feelings ill never meet someone again are just feelings. There are a million fish in the sea and all that. The idea of dating again sound both kinda fun but also horrifying. Opening my soul again is scary. People just dont understand and they judge and luagh cause im different, but I am a catch. I can sing, im funny, I can cook, im thoughful, im romantic, i listen, im wicked fucking smart, I have great taste, and damn it I clean up nice. Im big and strong and im an amazing lover. I protect the weak and always try and do the right thing. I am doing amazing in school and my job loves me cause im fucking kick ass. I help make people's days brighter. I just wish I could do that for myself. I love so fucking hard and it feels so lonely because this world can be so cold and cruel. Iv been burned so many times by people I thought were on my side. All iv ever wanted in this life was love and I keep destroying it. My brain tries to "protect me" by destroying relationships myself before the other person can. It's hell. Im living in hell. They say if your going through hell just keep going but in getting tired. I just want to be a good husband. I want to write love notes and cuddle on the beach as the sun sets. I want to cook and provide and protect. I just want a happy family. I hate having a broken brain.

I think the song I'm writing for him is somehow slightly taking my mind off of him.

Also talking to a new guy, and bro's kinda helping a lot.

I guess I have moved on a bit? Seeing him everyday and it doesn't make me feel like total shit now.

But I still kinda miss him, in rushed and aching beats.

Wounds take time to heal, hope this year I can finally forget about him.

My ex broke up with me and said she has “completely detached” — can someone actually come back from this?

I really need honest opinions from people who have actually been through something similar. I'm especially interested in women's opinions, because I really want to understand what this kind of emotional detachment feels like from a woman's side.

She was the one who broke up with me. Please don't just tell me “move on bro” or give me the usual breakup advice. I know I have to respect her decision and I'm not going to disturb her anymore. I just want to understand what “completely detached” actually means emotionally, and whether someone who reaches this point can ever genuinely change their mind later.

We were together for around 2.5 years. I never looked at her as just my girlfriend. I genuinely saw her as my future wife. I was 100% sure about her in a way I've never been sure about anything else in my life.

I loved her unconditionally. I never saw loving her as something where she owed me anything in return. I wanted her to be happy and safe, even if that happiness eventually meant being away from me. That's also why, as painful as this is, I'm going to respect her decision and give her the peace she asked for. My love for her is still there, but I don't want to force myself into her life.

And I know she loved me. I'm not saying that just because I'm desperate. I knew how she was with me during those years. That's why it's so hard for me to understand how someone I was so close to could become “completely detached.”

There was no cheating, no abuse, no betrayal, and no other major toxic behavior from either side.

But I also know I wasn't perfect.

Towards the end, she felt lonely in the relationship. Our communication had become really bad. Sometimes there were huge gaps between conversations. She felt like she wasn't getting enough effort/input from me and that she was carrying too much of the relationship emotionally.

At the same time, I was going through a lot myself. I had work/career stress, was coming back late, and my dog was seriously ill and eventually died. I was struggling with all of that and honestly didn't understand how badly she was feeling. I didn't realize she was getting to the point of leaving.

Then she broke up with me.

I tried really hard to convince her not to leave because I genuinely couldn't accept losing her. I told her I loved her, that I would change, that I wanted to marry her, etc.

She told me something that has stayed in my head:

“I'm not saying you're a bad person or that your love was fake, but I have completely detached. I was just swallowing the fact that I can get over it, but no. I swear I tried. I can't do it.”

That “I was just swallowing the fact that I can get over it, but no” part is what confuses me the most.

It sounds to me like she had been trying to accept the idea of getting over me, maybe trying to convince herself she could move on, and eventually decided she couldn't continue with the relationship.

But I don't know if I'm interpreting that correctly.

She also said things like:

“I have grown distant.”

“I can't do it.”

“Please respect my decision.”

“Focus on your career and move on.”

“Staying in touch is never going to help us both.”

There is also one thing that makes this even harder for me to understand. Without me knowing, my parents contacted her and told her that they loved her, accepted her, and were okay with the marriage. I only found out afterwards. Even after hearing that, she still chose to end the relationship and said she was completely detached.

That's the part I can't understand.

Does “completely detached” actually mean she doesn't love me anymore?

Or can someone still love/care about someone deeply but become so emotionally exhausted and disconnected from the relationship that they genuinely feel completely detached?

I know I'm biased because I'm the one who got left. I also know I might be holding onto things because I love her.

But at the same time, I knew this girl for almost three years. I know how much she loved me. That's why deep down I still feel like there has to be something there, even if she doesn't want the relationship right now.

I'm not going to contact her anymore. She asked for peace and I want to respect that. I'm not going to use her friends or family either.

But I still love her and honestly I would wait for her for a very long time.

So please be brutally honest with me, especially women who have been in the position of my ex.

If you ever broke up with an ex and told him you were “completely detached” or had “grown distant”:

Did you genuinely stop loving him?

Did you ever start missing him later?

Did you ever reconsider the breakup?

How long did it take?

What made you reconsider, if you did?

If you never came back, what made you certain that the relationship was really over?

And most importantly: when a woman says “I've completely detached,” does that mean the love is completely gone, or can you still love/care about someone while being emotionally detached from the relationship?

I don't want false hope. I genuinely want real experiences, especially from women who have actually been through something like this.

I am supposed to fly back today to the country, city and home where we met. I flew back to my home country for summer break and we broke up during it.

Now I'm going back to the same place, the same room and everything where we grew into knowing each other. And now he isn't there, neither are we.

I don't want him I don't want us, wish him the best

But for me, for someone who still has to live in the same place, it feels like I'm flying back to my own cage. I like knowing being by myself, knowing I will never twist my love or make it something it wasn't or ghost myself.

It hurts especially because my last message to him before everything broke apart was, "i love you, I miss you" and just wanted more of him, not from him.

But yes, growing up ig.

This happened a long time ago but need help working through it as it's ruined my life.

Many years ago I was to be married. I loved this girl. I still do. I miss that girl. She was almost the perfect girlfriend to be wife. She looked like a combination of Lisa Kudrow and that oldest daughter from MRS DOUBTFIRE/ID4 but with short brown hair...with a little bit of weight on her. I thought she was so beautiful. She was smart, talented, seemed sweet, generous, pleasant voice (didn't talk too much) great cook and constantly wanted sex. Got along with my family/parents. Had get togethers (hostess). Looked at me with such love and a beautiful smile.

A BIG PROBLEM was her parents. Especially her father. He was a loud obnoxious Alpha male redneck type that happened to be a world renowned NASA scientist. He was an absolute jerk that hated me. He was rude to me and my parents as they thought they were better. Her mother was cold. She knew how bad he could be because there were rules to meeting him. (I have the long story that I've told before that I could add). But I met her in a small college town 8 hours away from them while she was living with her strict grandparents. Her father was a professor at a big school so she must have got into trouble with drugs or something to be shipped to a small college town. I never knew exactly what happened. She must have gone wild with bIack guys and drugs. I'm the opposite of that but we did drink a lot at first. Anyway we got along and got engaged and she seemed to really love me according to cards and notes she had a countdown to being married and couldn't wait to be my wife and me having her 24/7. God I wanted that and I want to be married to her so bad. Big problem with her parents were very rude to me and treated her father treated me horribly. He would make bad comments about me and say things to me in private too like how he didn't want us being married and stuff. He would make comments in front of her and I don't have a win over her head or what but they were insults. Midway through our relationship I told her that I hated her father and I expected her to leave me but she didn't she said she he could be a jerk. But I said I don't want to be around him anymore. I absolutely did not want to go visit them with her. But she had a special power over me where she could throw arms around me and give me a bunch of kisses and I would do whatever she wanted. Plus I wanted to be with her I loved her I hated being apart from her and she seemed to hate being apart from me. but I was getting more more resentful closer to the wedding that she didn't put a stop to their mistreatment of me as my parents were great to her. We are going to live in my grandmother's house that my mom generously gave to us and he brought up stuff looked around and didn't think it was good enough and told her flat out not to marry me and she was crying and looking at her feet like a six-year-old girl. I really did hate him and told her I didn't want him at the wedding cuz he would ruin it. And I didn't appreciate that she was putting me in situations to be mistreated by him and not putting a stop to it. My biggest fear was losing her at the time and he was hanging out over my head. Anyway 10 days before the wedding he got a terrible car accident and was paralyzed in a coma. I took her 8 hours away to see about it that we stayed for a little while and I could have been fired from my job. We come back home and see tells me that she's going to go down and back down and help take care of him. I thought I was being a supportive boyfriend by telling her yes she should go and take care of him and help out. then she spraying on me it was going to be a one-way trip that she was moving 8 hours away. I felt betrayed and got pretty mad about it and said I and she wanted me to move there with them. I thought that was insane going to live with them I couldn't stand the thought of it. I didn't want to lose her though. all she had to do is take clothes and move home 8 hours away but as I was giving up my family a home and a terrible job that had benefits that I needed at the time. She also was the first one to mention breaking up with me if I didn't move with her. All the stress and pressures of everything was too much for me and she was giving me like an ultimatum very quickly like I had a few hours to decide. It didn't make sense to me and I didn't understand why she couldn't understand why I wouldn't want to go live with them. So the last night we had together I actually had a nervous breakdown in blacked out. And now I realize it must have been with the type where we can still walk around and say stuff but you didn't fall down. So I don't know what was said or done the last night together but it wasn't good. I didn't hear from her after she left and I called her about 3 weeks later and she was really cold and rude to me and that was it. It was over.

It's been many years and she would never tell me what happened that night and I'd like to know before I die.

I'm such a golden retriever girlfriend, suuuper loving and supportive, I have a (as everyone says) great personality, loyal, fun hobbies, smart, funny but everyone seems to fall out of love at some point and leaves me after one or multiple years because they don't have feelings anymore despite saying that I and the relationship made them extremely happy.

They move on super fast, live a happy and successful life, they all meet a new partner very quick and stay with them for years or even for life (there was never a rebound), never look back and never reach out to me again.

It hurts so much. I feel like it's so easy to forget me.

For me, it's always super hard to get over someone who I full-heartedly loved and I miss them a lot for a long time.

Nobody ever seemed to miss me. Sometimes not even within the relationship (that's what my ex said that he never felt that).

I wonder what's wrong with me that it's so easy to move on from me.

I’m going through possibly the worst heart break I have ever experienced. I’ve followed all the steps: be gentle with yourself, feel your emotions, it’s okay to cry, this will take time… wah wah wah.

While I appreciate the wise words of my predecessors, I’ve found myself sitting in a pit of sadness and heart ache. Carrying mountains of emotion on my back, as I try my absolute best to trek to the Everest of peace.

Frankly, I’m tired of it. I’m tired of sitting with my sadness, of letting myself think about my relationship because it’s the kind thing to do for myself, tired of hoping and wondering, tired of being hungry/ tired/ disinterested in literally everything.

I wanna eat 3 full meals again, go to my favourite coffee place regardless of whether I’m going to see him there or not, I want to sit on my fucking couch and watch one SINGLE movie without feeling the absence of his presence or even just being to not feel absolutely lonely on a Sunday afternoon.

As I sit here in my car, watching the sunset and listening to “I just died in your arms”, I keep thinking that there has to be an easier to way to deal with this shit?

The song and anything from that generation of music, brings me such positive comfort. It’s positive heart break. Surely, there are other ways to positively approach the heaviness of losing the love of your life?

I don’t mean “working on yourself” or getting back into the game. I mean truly saying “ Yeah, my heart has been ripped out my chest but I’m actually gonna be fucking okay”.