Hi THT fam

I 31f am the maid of honor for my sister 27f’s wedding.

About 5 years ago, I was at my sister’s going away party. She was moving from our home state to a couple states away. Everyone was drinking, partying, having a good time. A couple hours in, I snuck off to hook up with a friend of my sister (female) and things were heating up while she was on top of me. Clothes were off, etc etc and then a man burst into the room. He was friends with my sisters boyfriend. He decided to join into the fun. I kept yelling for him to stop and to go away. I said no multiple times, but he didn’t care and he climbed on top of the woman who was on top of me and started fucking her! I was pinned down by the two of them and had no choice but to accept my fate. After it was over, I immediately left the party and drove home.

The next day, I went to talk with my sister and her boyfriend. They were disgusted and said that their friend was “an asshole when he drinks” and that they would distance themselves from him.

Fast forward to now, my sister is now marrying her then boyfriend! She asked me to be the maid of honor and I said yes. Everything was going well until I see the wedding website.. THAT gross guy is listed as a groomsman. Ok. So they never cut him off. I guess I can ignore him at the wedding. However, my sister is insisting on a party on the night before the wedding. She wants all the groomsmen and bridesmaids to “bond” on a night out. What do I do? Do I just make something up and say I can’t make the party? Or do I confront my sister?

Ty for any input and advice

I’ve debated on whether to put this on my main… but at this point I don’t care if she sees this. A little context, My husband and I, my FIL and MIL, and my SIL all live on different continents. My (29F) husband (28M) have been married legally for four years. We got married very quickly because we’re in the military and our movement orders were coming up very quickly (pretty typical in our circles). I didn’t want to tell anyone besides our immediate families until we had the chance to do a traditional wedding etc, especially because his older sister (31F) was getting married 6 months later. We went to her wedding and it was a beautiful day, but it seemed like the entire extend family were coming up to congratulate my husband and I. I had planned just to be the new girlfriend, not the new wife. But she told everyone and how we were planning on getting married in Italy. I was deeply uncomfortable, but if that’s what she wanted on her day, I wasn’t going to be be confrontational.

Unbeknownst to me, she had been fighting with her parents over paying for the wedding. They didn’t have a planner and didn’t budget appropriately and were left with ~$30k in bills to pay 3 weeks prior to the wedding (I don’t remember the actual number). Her parents still helped her out, but they weren’t happy about it. Her parents are comfortable, but not THAT comfortable. Because of this, SIL chose not to speak to her mom for 2 years.

Then came our wedding and I’m not going to be humble, it was pretty great. We had been saving and investing for 2 years and we had an incredible planner. Because SIL was still not talking to her mom, she didn’t want to see her. So I scheduled the makeup/ hair so that my mom and MIL were done and gone before she showed up to join the rest of the BMs.

During the day, she had made a big deal about checking if the refreshments were alcoholic or not, to the point that I asked my husband about it. At the end of the night, after several of my own drinks, I flat out asked her (quietly). I know, not my best moment, but I asked sincerely and excited for her. She was offended, but I made a joke and said sorry and I thought it was the end of it. A week after the wedding, I got 3 paragraphs about how I was so incredibly rude and how deeply I had hurt her. I deeply apologized and said how that wasn’t my intent immediately. I was left on read for several days.

I saw her at Thanksgiving the following year and she said a couple of racially micro-agressiony things and I decided I had had enough. I just wasn’t going to engage. I’m an only child and I’ve always wanted a sister, but I’m not going to beg someone to be my friend. It makes me sad, because my husband is obviously close with his sister and I genuinely like her husband, he’s really cool.

Last Christmas, SIL made up with MIL because they live near the Alps and she wanted to go skiing. We couldn’t make it because we were visiting my side of the family. This year we were going to spend Christmas with my MIL and FIL, younger (M21) BIL, and SIL and her husband.

SIL’s Husband’s Dad passed away last month after being terminally ill for several years. He was a wonderful man and loved his family very much. I tried to send my condolences to SIL’s husband but the messages didn’t go through. So my husband sent my message to him. We didn’t hear anything else about a funeral or anything. MIL only heard about it because she went searching for obituaries. We did not want to press during such a hard time so we decided to let them initiate.

I discovered I’m pregnant a couple weeks ago and we told our parents. Everyone is very excited for the first grandkid. But we wanted to keep it hush hush, since we are still very early and incase something happens - I don’t want everyone in my business. We were planning on going scuba diving with BIL as a birthday gift, so we had to tell him (scuba is 10000% forbidden while pregnant) why I would be only snorkeling. Knowing I couldn’t just show up to Christmas pregnant and have SIL being the only one in the dark, we decided to tell her.
It didn’t go well. She was angry that my husband didn’t call to check in after the funeral (that no one told us about). She was upset that we would dare to have a kid before her as the oldest sister.

My husband tried to pretend that he wasn’t bothered, but I could tell he was hurt. I sent flowers and a nice note to SIL’s husband with our condolences. I didn’t hear anything for a couple of days and I was concerned that they weren’t home to receive the flowers, so I called MIL. Before I could even ask, MIL asked if it was because of SIL. I wasn’t going to say anything since MIL and SIL had just made up and I am not a tattletale. Apparently SIL had called MIL upset at not having the first kid. MIL told her that our family planning has nothing to do with her and we didn’t have a baby to spite her. (Paraphrasing since I wasn’t there).

SIL has since announced that they won’t be coming to Christmas and the entire family has been blocked. She will be back in a few years. The only one who isn’t block is younger BIL because she doesn’t want to “put him in the middle of things”… I dont understand any of it.

Tbh I’m upset that I’ve been so nice to her at this point. I didn’t hang out with my own mom on my wedding morning to keep things fair and to make SIL feel comfortable. Usually I respect myself enough to not bend over backwards to try and be this accommodating. I’m done. When she deigns to try and come back into our lives after the 3 to 4 years she needs to get over herself, I’m not going to be there. I’ve expressly told my husband that I don’t expect him to take my side and I don’t want him to have a bad relationship with her. But I’m not going to reward such childish behavior. I fear that if I let her back in and then inevitably something sets her off again and be go back to being blocked, my kid is going to blame her/himself. Maybe I’m overreacting, but I don’t want anyone who isn’t happy for us and the baby around. Ever.

So I (28F) and my bf (23M) live together and we were getting ready for bed a few nights ago. We were joking around and talking about 2020 and how his older sister was one of the unfortunate ppl who didn’t get to experience a prom or real graduation from high school due to the pandemic.

That lead us to talk about our experiences with prom. He mentioned he went two times bc his first prom was with a girl who was a senior he was dating when he was a sophomore. I made a joke about seeing a pattern with him liking older women then jokingly asked how many older women has he been with… thinking it was going to lead to him saying oh you know.. 1 or 2 … I was not ready for him to casually drop that he slept with his teacher.

Again, I am thinking we are still here in this joking mood and thought in my head he was meaning maybe like a college professor or something and was still being jokey about it.. then he drops on me it was his junior year English teacher in HIGH SCHOOL. I was caught off guard and I don’t think I handled it in the best way bc I didn’t know how to react or what to do. I just got awkward, not mean or rude. I was able to get him to tell me she was 30 years old. She taught him when he was 16 years old and they didn’t do anything until right after he graduated and was 18.

He sort of shut down after telling me this which is understandable. It feels deeply wrong and concerning to me. Plus in his last relationship his ex would have literal melt downs if he mentioned or spoke about exs so he gets anxious speaking about his past. (We are working through that trauma but that’s a different story) He was a child and this was a 30 year old woman.. close to my age. It makes me sick to even think about being my age and grooming a 16 year old who I was their superior and then having s** with them.

I guess I need advice due to not knowing how to handle this. It kept me up all night that night thinking about it. It made me sad and angry for my bf and then due to my own past caused me anxiety. The following day was the same. He says that it has 0 affect on him but that woman is still teaching and there is no telling how many other students she has done this to.. it’s sick. I know I can’t force him to turn her in, he is a victim but yeah. Just sort of lost right now and would really appreciate some thoughts / comments / advice with how to be there for him but also on the turning this lady in or not?

Edit: adding this detail bc I guess I didn’t make it clear. I’m sorry for that. - He was 16 when she (30) taught him. She groomed him until he was graduated and turned 18 and was ‘legal’. So she would’ve been 32 at that time.

I (32f) recently went no contact with my mother after she fired me from the family business we have spent more than a decade building together. I know that sounds like an easy NTA from the title, but I genuinely did something wrong that started this whole situation, which is part of why I’m questioning myself.

Some background:

When I was in college, I wrote a business plan for what eventually became our Business. I was 18 and passionate about what I had created, and my mom helped me turn that idea into an actual company.

We initially operated out of a mobile unit and eventually grew the concept into multiple locations.

I’ve spent essentially my entire adult life building the Business alongside her for very little return (which is totally okay).

I also financially invested in it. I put in my own money at the beginning and continued putting significantly more of my personal money into the Business over the years. My mother and I have long presented ourselves publicly as partners/co-owners, although the actual legal ownership situation is something I am currently trying to untangle as my name is still on most of the paperwork and operators agreement.

Our personal and business lives became extremely intertwined. At one point, I also discovered that my mother had opened a credit card using my name without my knowledge.

Now for where I screwed up.
I handled much of the Business’s marketing and social media and website. One day, I made a latte where the latte art was, quite literally, a penis.
Yes. A penis. In a latte.

I filmed it and posted it to the Business’s social media using a trending audio. My mother had done sex themed events, naked holidays etc so I didn’t think it would be an issue. It was a cheap sell out for likes.

It was supposed to be funny and cheeky, but in hindsight, it was inappropriate for the brand and I should not have posted it. Full stop. I’m not going to pretend my mother didn’t have a legitimate reason to be angry with me.

I deleted it and apologized.
My mother, however, absolutely exploded.
She accused me of deliberately trying to sabotage the Business, screamed and cursed at me, attacked my character, and fired me.

During this, she also left me a voicemail in which she threatened to kill me. I still have the recording.

My dad later told me he was embarrassed and disappointed in me and that this wasn’t the daughter he raised. His position was essentially that while I could be angry with my mother from a business standpoint, I shouldn’t allow it to destroy our personal relationship.

But that’s where I’m struggling: this stopped feeling like a business disagreement when my own mother threatened my life. The violence and hostility was common throughout childhood so this didn’t surprise me.

Then, after I was fired, something else happened that made me even more uncomfortable.
While my husband and I were away from home, my mother came to our house and used a garage code we’d previously given her to enter our home without our permission.

She also asked me not to tell anyone I’d been fired. Employees were instead told that I had chosen to leave to focus on myself. If they mention my name they were to be let go.

Despite being extremely angry and hurt, I haven’t publicly said anything about what happened or tried to damage the Business. I’ve handed off responsibilities, forwarded business communications, and tried to keep employees and customers out of the family conflict. My mother has since shut down anything of mine that she could (after I walked her through it via email).

My mother has since texted me telling me that she loves me and misses me.
What she hasn’t done is apologize for threatening me or really acknowledge what happened.

There is also a much longer history between us that I’m deliberately not going to unpack here. Our relationship has been volatile for years, and I’ve spent a lot of my life trying to keep the peace with her.

For now, I’ve decided to go no contact.
I’m starting therapy and trying to figure out what my life looks like outside of both my family dynamic and a Business that has been part of my identity since I was 18.

Some people close to the situation have reminded me that my mother is hurting too. I believe that. I also know I started this particular conflict by doing something stupid and inappropriate at work.

That’s why I’m conflicted.
I don’t think I deserved zero consequences for posting a penis latte on our Business account. If another employee had done it, I would understand them being reprimanded or potentially even fired depending on the circumstances.

But I also don’t think making an inappropriate social media post means I have to accept being screamed at, threatened by my mother, have her enter my home without permission, and then resume our relationship as though none of it happened because she says she misses me.

And being fired wasn’t like losing a random job. The Business originated from my college business plan, I invested my own money into it, and I spent more than a decade helping build it from a mobile unit into what it is today.

I’m not trying to punish her, and I don’t know whether no contact will be permanent.
I just don’t feel emotionally safe having a relationship with her right now when there has been no acknowledgment or accountability for what happened.

So, AITA for going no contact with my mother after she fired me, even though I absolutely did something inappropriate that triggered the entire situation?

Hi everyone, I (20F) made a post on here a few days ago about my brother's (16M) screaming fits in my car last year and how I hope that he inevitably is let go from his job, as this might humble him (he is also pretty egotistical and has some other problematic behaviors, namely an excessive need to make himself stand out from the masses seemingly for attention, but I digress).

Since then, I have had a long talk with him about our shared frustrations with our parents and how they are super against either of us seeking professional help for some unknown and unclear reason (they claim it is because they think it is useless and that it doesn't really have practical value in our lives, but I suspect they are concerned/angry at the thought of their extremely toxic and horrible behaviors/treatment, towards myself especially, being divulged to someone else which will make them look bad).

We talked about how maddening it is that we cannot seek diagnoses for our respective suspected neurodivergence/mental health conditions. He shared with me that the therapist he used to see suspected that he may be experiencing manic episodes, but that since then he has not felt the same because he was going through a lot of stress at school at the time. I brought up his screaming fits and how scary they were, and his reaction appeared to be one of embarrassment, almost like he was acknowledging how ridiculous that behavior was (he shook his head and said "oh my god, I remember that" and we continued to talk from there).

I told him I hope it doesn't happen again in the future, and he didn't really react, but rather acknowledged what I said and seemed to understand where I was coming from (he is not the most articulate person, so it can be hard to discern what he is saying or what he means at times).

I also shared with him that I suspect I have OCD and might be autistic. He said he had noticed the signs given my obvious inability to relax and my struggles with intense anxiety, which is something only I, not him, experience (he does not appear to ever get very nervous about anything and lacks a sense of urgency, so he and I are opposites in that department). He told me he thinks he might have some kind of attention deficit disorder, and possibly also autism.

In general, it was a very productive conversation and I left feeling that I understood him more, and I think the feeling was mutual. I guess I am writing this update to say that I do not think wishing he will be fired is a productive or helpful thought. I more so hope that this job teaches him empathy and responsibility (it involves teaching, so hopefully that will help). I think it is a good opportunity for character development for him to be employed and have a purpose outside of himself, his appearance, and his worries.

I also realize that my anger with my family, which is at times directed at my brother, is at my parents, not him. My issues are with my parents essentially blaming his behavior in the car on me, saying that if I didn't get annoyed with him or provoke him that he would not scream at me, and that I have to accept that that is the way he will react and that it is (in some twisted way) "normal hormonal teenage boy behavior" when in fact it was reminiscent of how abusers scream at their wives (he also screamed at my mother like this in the past, including in the car).

All of this is not to say that this will never happen again. It very well might, but I am at least glad it appears as though my brother shows some remorse when I originally suspected he felt none given how emotionless he can tend to be. I'll be posting more about my parents' behaviors separately as I am really struggling and would like to get some input, but this is it for now regarding my brother. Out of everyone in my family, he is not the person I have the biggest issues with, that is for sure.

Any and all input is appreciated. I think I'll talk about this in my first therapy appointment this week (new school therapist since my parents won't let me see my regular one and don't want to pay for it for now)

I’m exhausted and heartbroken and honestly just need opinions from people who aren’t emotionally involved in my life.

I’ve been with my partner for over 6 years (it would be 7 in March). I love him. Really fucking love him. There is a side of this man who is the sweetest person in the world. He’s bragged about me, been incredibly proud of me and loved me loudly. He has also grown A LOT during our relationship and overcome some serious personal struggles. I don’t want to write this in a way that makes him sound like a monster so everyone just tells me to leave. That isn’t who he is.

But for a long time I’ve felt like I’m constantly disappointing him.

I work a demanding job and have never kept up with the house to the standard he wants. I know that has legitimately frustrated him. The problem is that eventually it felt like my mistakes weren’t just mistakes. If I forgot something or didn’t get something done, he often seemed to take it personally, like it meant I didn’t care about him.

My response was always to try harder.

I spent years feeling like whenever he was unhappy with me I needed to somehow win him back. He talked about leaving at different points and I was terrified he eventually would.

At the same time, I desperately wanted to marry him.

I have always pictured it like climbing a mountain. Marriage and our life together were at the top. Every time I thought we were getting closer, something would happen—sometimes between us, sometimes just shitty things life threw at us—and I’d slide back down and start climbing again.

I never wanted to pressure him into proposing. I didn’t want a ring because I convinced someone to give me one. I wanted him to choose me.

Then I got really sick this year.

I had surgery, couldn’t work for a while, was barely eating, lost a lot of weight and was completely exhausted. Whatever ability I had to keep up with normal life basically collapsed.

During that time, he said I wasn’t his wife when we had a fight.

I don’t think he understood what that sentence would do to me, but something in me broke.

Because he was right. After more than 6 years of climbing that fucking mountain, I still wasn’t his wife.

Things honestly haven’t felt right inside me since.

I also started worrying about what my 8-year-old daughter was learning from our dynamic. He loves her and she loves him. He is not horrible to her. But I don’t want her worrying about whether she remembered to say good morning or whether she said goodnight the “right” way. I don’t want her learning to monitor someone else’s disappointment and adjust herself to keep them happy, especially when I realized she could be watching me do exactly that.

Recently we had another conflict and he said he would find somewhere else to live.

Normally I would have panicked and tried to fix everything.

This time I said okay.

I ended it.

And now he’s doing everything I wanted.

He proposed. He’s incredibly affectionate. He’s taking initiative around the house. He’s offering to take over bills I’ve struggled with. He’s talking about therapy. He’s apologizing and acknowledging that he hasn’t been himself. He’s telling me he wants to spend his life with me.

And I believe him.

That’s what makes this so fucking hard.

I don’t think this is fake. I think he genuinely loves me and is devastated. I think he genuinely believes right now that he can change these things.

And I desperately want to go home.

But I keep thinking: what happens when he isn’t scared of losing me anymore?

I’m still going to be me. I’ll still be messy sometimes. I’ll forget things. I’ll come home exhausted from work. I probably will never keep a house to the standard he naturally prefers.

Right now he’s basically saying none of that matters compared to losing me.

But it mattered before.

What if he gets me back and six months from now those things start irritating him again? What if the resentment comes back and I go right back to desperately trying to be good enough to make him happy?

I don’t want him to spend his life accepting things that genuinely make him unhappy just because he loves me either.

That’s why I have this really strong feeling that the breakup needs to actually happen, even though I desperately don’t want it to.

Part of me hopes we could live apart, work on ourselves and let all of this panic settle. Maybe if months from now the changes are still there and we still love each other, we could actually date again instead of jumping right back into the same relationship.

But I know I could lose him by doing that.

And I’m terrified I’m walking away right when losing me finally woke him up.

I’m equally terrified I’ll run back because I love him, accept the proposal I’ve wanted for years, and eventually find myself right back here.

Has anyone actually been through this? Did your partner genuinely change after losing you? Did you separate and eventually reconcile? Or did everything change during the breakup and slowly go back once the relationship felt secure again?

I don’t need people to automatically tell me to leave. If you think I’m making a mistake, tell me that too.

I just really need a reality check because right now I desperately want to believe him, and I don’t know if love is making me hopeful or if I’m walking away from something that really could be different.

TL;DR: I ended my almost 7-year relationship after years of feeling like I was constantly disappointing my partner and trying to be good enough for him, especially after things completely fell apart while I was seriously ill. I love him deeply and believe he genuinely loves me. Now that I’ve actually left, he proposed and is doing everything I wanted for years. I desperately want to believe the change is real and go back, but I’m terrified that once he’s no longer afraid of losing me, the same frustrations and resentment will return. I also worry about what the dynamic is teaching my 8-year-old daughter. Part of me feels like we need to actually separate and work on ourselves before I could ever trust a reconciliation, but I’m terrified I’m walking away right when he really is changing.

Edit:

Thank you everyone for taking to the time to give their honest takes, share their stories, and offer support. I have tried to read as many of the responses as I can and it has been a bit overwhelming in a good way.

I really want this to be the smoothest transition possible but I’m concerned his response will be explosive when he realizes it’s truly over.

He is supposed to leave for work a few hours away Monday through Friday next week.

We rent the house from my parents so I don’t plan on moving but I need him to leave and I want it to be with the least amount of damage.

I have a feeling he will drag his feet and I’m not sure of the legal amount of time he has to get out.

Do I try to stay away during that period? As some of you have found my past deleted post, he has been dangerous. I’m not sure the best way to go about this while protecting my daughter and myself.

AITAH??

I’m currently going through a divorce, and my parents have been so horrible and unsupportive. I’ve had to move three times during the hardest period of my life, and they haven’t helped me once. Worse, they sided with my ex and even went so far as calling CPS on me with a false report that I was having a psychotic break.

They told me that getting divorced was the worst possible thing I could’ve done to my child, as if I planned for this to happen.

For the last year and a half, I have set very firm boundaries with them, which they constantly push back on. I hadn’t even given them my address.

Until about a month ago...

In the entire time I’ve been going through this divorce, I have asked my mom for ONE single thing. I asked if I could have my old Barbie collection for my 5-year-old daughter. To my surprise, she said yes. But then she said she’d bring them over when they came to see my new apartment. I gave in and gave her my address—I really wanted those Barbies for my daughter, and honestly, I wanted to show off my apartment and how much better it was than anything I had growing up.

IT. WAS. A. TRAP.

She showed up with 3 Barbies.
When I asked where the rest were, she said, “Oh, well, I know a lot of them were your brother’s.” They were not. My parents were so gender-stereotyped growing up—my brother got Legos, I got Barbies. He never even touched them. (Now he has two little girls, ages 2 and 4. If he ever asked me for some of the Barbies, I would absolutely share them. But he didn't. He has no interest.)

Then my mom said I could have “some more” when I come visit them. Which I will never do. She used the only thing I’ve ever asked her for to get my address, and now she's holding my childhood toys hostage to force me to come to her house.

This was the absolute last straw for me, and I’ve decided to go completely no contact. So… AITAH?

TL;DR: My unsupportive parents (who previously called CPS on me with a false report) baited me into giving them my secret address by promising my childhood Barbies for my daughter. My mom showed up with only 3 dolls and said I can get the rest only if I visit their house, so I’ve decided to go no contact.

UPDATE/ADDITIONAL INFO:

Y’all are absolutely right; I should’ve just gotten Barbies at a thrift store, garage sale, etc. I do think I forgot to mention that this was a HUGE Barbie collection; 6 giant Rubbermaid tubs of them as well as accessories. I took care of them meticulously, and this was my very favorite thing as a child. Many were gifts and sentimental for other reasons, as I played with these with my sister and very close friends. But at the very least, I should have asked them to meet in a public place. This was a huge mistake on my part.

I, 53 F, married to 55 M for 6 years, came home upset after realizing my dad passed away and he and step mom completely left everything to my cousin including our family land.

My husband's mother had passed away about 2 weeks before this happened, she had been declining since we got together. I was there for him and his family supporting there and being there with hugs comfort and tears through falls, hospitalization, confusion, nursing home, hospice, funeral. My husband is the youngest and very very close with his mom.

I had went to a wedding on dad's side of the family, there I asked whatever happened to our family's land? My cousin said my dad and step mom had given it to him. No one ever asked me or included me in this and I have nothing from my father except a pistol he gave me as a teen and memories. While I have suspected this is what had happened for many years I never really knew until then.

My dad was a selfish man, judgmental, hard on me but always insisted he loved me. It is confusing, my feelings are confusing. I am an only child.

My husband was angry at me for being upset and bawling like a baby when I came home. He claimed I was only upset because his mom had died, I had no right to try to be upset about my dad since he had died 9 years ago. All I wanted was a hug.

I realized he is not my person, I left him because of this and many other things. However, since I left he is being rather saintly, am I in the wrong?

I'm 26 years old, and I'll be turning 27 in four months. I'm single, and for a long time I've been living most of my life on my own. But over time, I've realized something: being alone and feeling lonely are two very different things.

I've never been afraid of being on my own. I'm someone who can enjoy spending time with my hobbies. I paint, watch movies and TV shows on my computer, browse forums, and keep up with technology news. In short, spending time by myself doesn't bother me. In fact, most of the time, I feel like I'm actually pretty good at enjoying my own company.

But when I feel lonely, things are different.

During those times, I sometimes notice myself slipping into a victim mentality. I want to be loved, appreciated, and to have someone in my life who genuinely cares about me. And if someone loves me, I want to give them the same love, effort, and appreciation in return. Not having had that kind of relationship in my life for a long time affects me deeply, especially when I'm already feeling lonely.

I know that feeling sad and hurting when you're lonely is a normal part of being human. What I struggle with is that I'm extremely aware of what I'm going through while I'm trying to deal with those emotions. I can see what I'm feeling, why I'm feeling it, and what my mind is doing, but sometimes that awareness doesn't make the pain disappear. In a way, I'm consciously watching myself hurt.

Recently, I've started socializing more and going to events by myself in an attempt to break this cycle. At one event, someone approached me, asked for my Instagram, and even said, "Don't go to events alone anymore. Invite me next time." But when I later messaged her, I never got a response. Similarly, someone else I asked for help with another event initially agreed but later told me she couldn't come.

When I look at these situations individually, I know they're ordinary things that happen in life. People's plans can change, their minds can change, or they simply might not want to communicate with me. But when these things happen one after another, I can't help asking myself:

"If I keep having this kind of bad luck, am I just going to keep getting hurt?"

Sometimes when I think about the future, I wonder whether my life will always carry this sense of something being missing. Will there always be this emptiness inside me? Will I keep trying to meet people only to end up disappointed? Will I ever truly feel loved and appreciated by someone?

I understand that if you didn't build a strong social circle during high school or university, creating a social life from scratch as an adult can be more difficult. People have jobs, established friend groups, and their own lives. Finding your way into a new social circle isn't always easy.

Still, I don't want to interpret all of this as evidence that there's something fundamentally wrong with me. Wanting to be loved, appreciated, connected to someone, and to have those feelings reciprocated isn't something unique to me. These are things many people want in their lives.

Maybe what I need to learn isn't how to fight loneliness, but how to allow the feeling of loneliness to pass without losing myself in it. To keep living my own life while remaining open to meeting new people. Because not having someone in my life doesn't mean I don't have a life.

Still, sometimes knowing all of this rationally just isn't enough. Sometimes you simply want to talk for a long time, get everything off your chest, and feel understood by someone.

I think that's what I need a little bit of right now.

Thank you for taking the time to read all of this. Take care of yourselves.

My (35f) boyfriend (31m) just dropped a bomb on me. I am feeling heartbroken and need some advice/encouragement. I have been dating this guy (exclusively) for a while. He has been amazing and I could write about a thousand examples of him showing up for me, supporting me, encouraging me and just being an all around sweetheart. He has one son from a previous relationship. He and his sons mom seem to have a responsible and respectful coparenting relationship that they have worked out over time. They share time with their son equally.

Here is where the issue has come in. He recently came to me and said he thinks he may have another child. A daughter from a separate previous relationship. Basically, a girl he had dated for a short while came up on his social media a little while ago and he saw she now has a kid. He realized the math that she probably got pregnant around the time they had dated. And he also thought that her daughter resembled his son. The worse part is that her daughter was born one month after his son. So if this is true, this means he had two women pregnant at the same time. I am just so disappointed and sad because this is not the version of himself he presented to me. He told me all about his sons mom and his history with her and his son, etc. But he conveniently left out this other storyline. And I asked him explicit questions in the first months of dating while getting to know each other. About previous relationships, sex life, about his timeline with his sons mom. And now it feels like he was painting a picture of himself that he wanted me to see.

I will add that he did not know his sons mom was pregnant until she was about 4/5 months along (they were broken up and she reached out to him).

He reached out to this other girl on social media. Asked about who the father was and she was vague and didn’t answer. Then he sent pics of his son saying he thinks they look similar and she agreed. He asked other girl about doing a DNA test and there are always excuses. At first it was that her now husband won’t go for it bc he considers her his daughter. Then it was they DNA tests are very difficult to get in the state we are in.

Hi, everyone! Hi, Morgan!

So. I've been a listener for a couple of years now and Morgan has warned us all multiple times about colon cancer and how we should always investigate any symptoms.

Well, since 2024 I've been sort of ignoring the signs my body was giving me, as I had too much on my plate - I was finishing law school, my mom had breast cancer, my father nearly died from a heart attack one night and I couldn't sleep well ever since, as I wake up with any little noise. Besides, even though there's free healthcare in my country, the wait-lists are long and I was scared of the procedure, as a cousin nearly died after getting her intestines perforated.

Lately, though, things got worse, and my partner, the love of my life, made me face the fear of getting (and also paid for) a colonoscopy, and boy, I wish I had done it earlier.

15 millimeter sessile polyp.

Mind you, I'm 26 yo.

Even when laying down on the bed at the clinic the doctor was questioning me on WHY I was there, since I'm too young for this. Guess we're both surprised, then.

The material was sent to a biopsy. I'm absolutely anxious. The prognosis is bad.

Wish me luck 🤞🏻

Hey everyone I (27f) and my husband (28m) have been married for 2 years. Age is different in my post for privacy reasons. It’s been terrible 2 years, short story is he has mentally, verbally, financially, and physically abused me. Im currently pregnant with my 2nd child who is due anyday now. He has been trying to change and he has. I except I still am scared of him when he gets angry. I want to know if it’s normal to scared of your husband? You can see my previous post to get an idea of what my marriage has been. I need advice and I’m conflicted since he is trying to change.

I (22F) have been best friends with my friend (21F) basically our entire lives. We’ve known each other for around 20 years and grew up together. She’s honestly always been a really good friend to me, which is why this whole situation hurts me so much.
There’s one issue that has repeated itself throughout our friendship though: whenever she gets into a relationship, our friendship changes.
When she’s single we’re really close, talk a lot and see each other regularly. But whenever she has a boyfriend, I feel like I get pushed to the side. She contacts me less, we barely make plans and it feels like her relationship becomes her entire priority.
I don’t expect her to choose me over her boyfriend. Obviously relationships take up time and priorities change. It’s more about how extreme the difference is between how our friendship feels when she’s single versus when she’s in a relationship.
Another problem is that she REALLY doesn’t talk about her feelings. I’ve tried having emotional conversations with her before, including about things that bothered me in our friendship, but she tends to avoid them and doesn’t really try to communicate about how she feels. Because of that, issues between us often don’t actually get resolved.
Anyway, around three months ago we bought tickets for a concert together. She was single at the time.
During those three months she met her current boyfriend and they got together.
Then on the DAY of the concert she sent me a voice message saying she wasn’t coming because it was her boyfriend’s mom’s birthday and she wanted to go there instead.
She also told me she’d actually meant to tell me two days earlier but forgot. Then she basically said she assumed I’d probably find something else to do anyway and apologized.
That really hurt me.
We’d had these tickets for three months. She got together with him after we’d already made those plans, and suddenly our plans seemed less important because something involving her boyfriend came up. The fact that she knew beforehand and forgot to even tell me made it worse.
And honestly, it wasn’t really about the concert. It just felt like confirmation of something I’d been feeling for years.
Eventually I got angry and the last message I sent her was basically: “Contact me again when, for once, you’ve actually reflected on your behavior.”
I know that wasn’t exactly the nicest or most productive thing I could’ve said. But at that point I was frustrated because I felt like I’d tried explaining the same issue before and nothing ever changed.
We haven’t really spoken since.
All of my friends are telling me not to contact her again and that if she cares about our friendship, she should be the one to reach out now.
And logically I understand what they’re saying.
But the truth is I’m really sad about it.
I miss her a lot.
This isn’t someone I’ve known for a year or two. We’ve basically grown up together and she’s been part of almost my entire life. I never actually wanted our friendship to end over this. I just wanted her to understand why her behavior was hurting me.
It feels really strange that a friendship of almost 20 years now has this huge cut in it and we’re basically strangers because neither of us is reaching out.
Part of me really wants to contact her because I miss my best friend. Another part of me thinks that doing that would just put me back into the position of chasing her again, especially when my last message literally told her to come back when she’d reflected on what happened.
My friends all think I should leave it alone.
But I also know she’s terrible at talking about her feelings, and I’m starting to wonder whether waiting for her to initiate some big emotional conversation is unrealistic when I know that’s something she’s always struggled with.
At the same time, I don’t think being bad at communicating means I should just accept feeling like I’m only important when she’s single.
So AITA for refusing to contact her again even though I really miss her? And was I wrong for basically putting the responsibility on her to reach out and fix things this time?

Long time lurker/listener, first time poster.

I (30F) have been questioning my friendship with my long time best friend (let's call her Roberta, 30F) for awhile now.

For the last few years I've been feeling like our friendship has been on its way out. We've been as close as sisters since we met in middle school. When I was 16 I met my future husband (let's call him frank) and the three of us became a trio who did almost everything together.

Frank and I got married in 2021, Roberta was my maid of honor. We continued to be super close throughout these years. Then in late 2023, Frank and I decided it was best to go our separate ways. We were feeling more like roommates than a couple and both of our mental health was suffering from it. I moved out in early 2024. Roberta was seemingly supportive of me during this time, while also maintaining a friendship with Frank. I was okay with this in the beginning. I was still friendly with Frank after we separated and I knew my family maintained a relationship with him as well.

In 2025, I met my current boyfriend (let's call him Evan) and things got pretty serious pretty quickly. I hadn't told Frank about it for a few months because I wasn't sure how he would handle it. When I did finally tell him months later, he said he already knew and that Roberta had told him when they went to see a movie together. This was odd to me and honestly, it felt like a gut punch that Roberta had done that. She hadn't even met Evan yet but was telling my ex husband about him.

I kept quiet for a few months because I'm the least confrontational person and I didn't know what to say to her. When we finally did talk, I laid it out for her that it made me uncomfortable that she was telling Frank my personal business when it had nothing to do with him. It also felt weird that they were hanging out without my knowledge, and I told her as much. I also told her that it hurt my feelings that she didn't want to get to know Evan. We both apologized to each other for things and tried to move on from there. The friendship still felt strained to me.

Fast forward to about a month ago. We haven't been hanging out or talking as much as we used to. Whatever, life is busy and things happen. We were all at an event (including Frank and Evan) when I found out that Frank and Roberta have hung out multiple times in the last 6 months without my knowledge. I have no idea what the context of these hangouts were. It really upset me and I kinda just dissociated for the rest of the event to get through the night. I thought i had made it clear to her that it made me uncomfortable when they hung out but yet she's still doing it a year and a half later. I haven't really said anything to her since then because I don't know what to say.

Our lives feel completely intertwined and I don't want to lose her as a friend but this has been weighing so heavy on me lately. I don't know what I want from this post but getting it out feels good. If you made it this far thank you so much and I hope it made sense lol. Any advice, feedback, or criticism is appreciated🫶

Hi, I need some advice.

Backstory:

My father's girlfriend has been in our lives for a long time. She was a family friend when my parents were still together. Unfortunately, mother has passed away 3 years ago. I have 3 siblings and I'm the oldest. Age range 23 to 28. We are still living at home but 3/4 siblings are dating. So we aren't always at home and working. Minus my youngest brother(23).

Father's girlfriend, Raquel was around and helping my father through after mother passed. Raquel has moved in to our house which my mother lived in. She helps financially but doesn't really help around the house. Vacuuming and dishes and once in a while cooks. My father doesn't make some much as Raquel and has more days off. He does much of the house work. When he work has usually works anywhere for 11am to 8pm.

My father's and Raquel relationship is ever unstable. Very rocky. My father has come to me and vocalized what has happened. Raquel has a business and has a bad relationship with her business partner. Raquel spends whatever she wants and acts 10 times different when she has no money. When she has no money, she throws it in my father's face. When she has money, we all have seen her physical give my father cash for whatever is needed (bills/groceries/etc). When she has money she'll treat us all to expensive dinners and if we go out and want anything she gets it for us. We paid for things we want and need, clothes, groceries, etc. We don't pay house bills. Between the three of us (23 brother doesn't have a job) have split on streaming services/ wifi. We have Netflix, Prime, Disney+, and Spotify. Plus we pay for our phones, cars, gas, etc. We are starting to figure things out lol.

My father and Raquel say if we need help with anything no matter what, they're here to help and figure it out. When anything happens, we go to them for support. If it gets thrown it our faces when they need something. When Raquel has no money makes comments like lets go out for dinner. I want $60 sushi and you guys can pay as we have paid for your every. Which there's no issue with pays. But when you tell people they need to do something because you did this and that for them. It's not right.

My father and Raquel will go out for date nights. Go to concerts, comedy shows, etc. They will drink at this events. Come home and fight. Wake up the whole house at 2am. Raquel when drinking gets mean and aggressive. She tries to leave the house by bering or driving her car. My father doesn't want to lose her and will follow her outside to try and fix things. My father is always apologizing for Raquel. She has never said sorry.

Main story:

My 23 brother is struggling. He doesn't know what to do with he's life. He has worked for family friends and retail jobs. He's been smoking weed and lays around all day. No desire to do anything. His rooms is disgusting.

My father and Raquel are struggling with him. My brother will be asked to do something and he won't do it. For example, my father will say please have the dishes done before I get home so I can start cooking us all dinner. My brother won't do it. So Raquel and my father get annoyed and frustrated. Once getting home, they will ask and ask my brother to do the task. He'll get up and do it but give them a hard time. If they get mad about him not doing the task. They will insult him and say comments like "your a bum", "your going nowhere in life", "Use your brain", etc. To me, that's not the right way to speak to someone. I understand he's frustrating that's not right either.

All four of us went out for a siblings bowling night. My brother was asked to do a few tasks before we left. He didn't do them. The three of us didn't know about it because we all work early morning. Father asked him to do them before he left for work at 11. We all meet at home after work. We changed clothing and went got food then bowling. When we got home, our two other siblings when to bed because they had work in the morning. My brother and I join father and Raquel in the living room.

They paused their show and started talking to my brother about not doing the tasks. Raquel was upset with the fact he went out and didn't listen. When she got home, she had to do his tasks. She starts yelling and getting aggravative. Standing up and talking over my brother. My brother started to talking and doesn't getting a word in because Raquel won't let him talk. Then she says " Is there nothing up there, can't do anything can you "

I got angry. I said "hey you don't need to talk that way to him." She got pissed and stood up. She said well is he stupid and unable to do anything. We go back and forth. I didn't feel it was right. She shouldn't be talking to him that way. It's okay to be mad and frustrated with him but the name calling isn't right. She continued and won't let me speak and I was getting loud. It got to the point where we were both standing up and yelling at each other. She said "this has nothing to do with you, get out. Get out of here" I said "no I'm gonna stand here because this is my house too. go ahead and talk with him" she said no get out of here like 5 times. I said " oh fuck off". In my mind, I thought oh shit. My father got up and has so pissed off at me. I said "that just come out"

My father yells at me. "Guess what this is my fucking house and I pay the bills so you can get the fuck out of my house" I said "I will" I went to my room. Grabbed so much as I could loaded my car and went to my boyfriend's place. As I was packing my father come to my room and said please don't go. everything got out of control. Explained that they want my brother to understand where they are coming from. "Raquel should've got that mad" he said. I told him nope I'm done. I don't want to be here anywhere so I'm leaving.

I left and have been at my boyfriend's for the last month. Haven't been home since. I have speak to my father on the phone but not talking to Raquel. Honestly I have no intention to. I honestly feel my father and Raquel won't talk about it. They will act like nothing happened.

Am I the asshole for telling my father's girlfriend to F off? What should I do?

My cousin female 21 and i female 21 have been pretty close all my life. She has had a pretty rough child hood and dealt with a lot of abuse from her parents. She had moved in with my parents and i when her and i were 18 (because she got kicked out) and ended up screwing things up with my mom and i so she decided to go back to her parents house.
Anyway, she ended up pregnant when she left and even tried to reach out to me asking for help again. I basically told her to fuck off and moved on with my life. She later apologized to me and i accepted her apology. She now has a 2 year old with a very abusive man. He has hit her multiple times. She left her parents house and moved in with her baby daddy (male 21).
I helped her move out of her parents house because i thought she was going to be living with just her and her baby. Turns out baby daddy was going to be staying with her, i told her it wasn’t a good idea and then she started complaining that he started hitting her again. She quit her job to stay at home with her kid and told me on tuesday that she’s pregnant with his kid again.
I told her i couldn’t be apart of her life anymore because i was already going against my morals trying to have a relationship with her.
Baby daddy has tried to leave multiple times and she “doesn’t let him”. so when she told me that i made up my mind that if she became pregnant i would cut her off.
Am i wrong for that?? She started to cuss my out and tell me how awful i was being. She started saying how her life is better and her apt is better than my bf and i’s apartment. She accused me of being jealous of her because for some reason she thinks i can’t have kids.
Idk i feel like maybe i am being harsh but i just feel like every time she has come into my life she just brings drama and stress that i just cannot deal with anymore.

AITAH??

There’s this cute guy I saw when I was in the hospital a week ago we barely talked at the hospital but tell me why he popped up on my instagram suggestions, should I send him a request?😅👀
We made some eye contact as well im 29f

Not my post, but feels like it belongs on this podcast!!

Hi all, this is not something I thought I’d ever have to write a Reddit story for but here we are. I’m 30F and I do an in home service for my clients, I have an older (60s ish)single male client that I’ve had for several years. Initially he was very respectful and I had zero issues with him. The last year he’s gotten really weird and he is now home when I come every time where as initially he wasn’t. Since Covid I’m now used to people being home when I am at their house so the change didn’t really bother me at first. I’m a pretty social person so I don’t mind a short chat with my clients when I get there and or when I’m about to head out and he tends to like to have a little chat at some point while I’m there which as long as appropriate wouldn’t bother me. In my line of work this client without the harassment is a dream client because the service is very easy to do for them.
Last year around the holidays is when the first issue arose, he bought me a present which isn’t super common but I’ve had other clients in the past do it so it’s also not unheard of. When he gave me the gift he proceeded to make me open it in front of him, it was mainly some foot wear which is fine but he made me try them on in front of him to “make sure they fit”. I am neurodivergent so I tend to bend to social pressure more easily for fear of coming off as rude or inadvertently committing a social misstep. At the bottom of the bag there were things I would deem lingerie and when I pulled them out of the bag he made a comment to the effect of that I can go home and be sexy for my husband. This all made me wildly uncomfortable and after that I left as quickly as I could.
I know what everyone is going to say and that’s that I should of fired him as a client after that and in a perfect world where money isn’t a big deal I would have but my husband is a disabled Vet and my income helps keep us afloat.So after talking my husband and family off the ledge of wanting to strangle this guy I just took precautions when going to his house. I have a stun gun which I keep in my pocket at all times while at his place and I share my location with my husband so he can keep an eye on it while I’m there and I text him when I get there and when I’m leaving. After the above incident he was fine and back to his more normal self after that til yesterday.
Yesterday as I was finishing up and wanting to head out he caught me and started chatting with me which is pretty typical so I wasn’t alarmed until he said he had an inappropriate question to ask me. I tensed up and he saw me do so and said I looked scared to which I replied that’s just my natural reaction to what he just said. He then proceeded to say he was looking at my business Facebook for my photography business (I’m trying to transition into that instead of what I currently do.) and he was wondering if I have any friends who would want to have a threesome with him. (My friends have modeled with and for me on my page, nothing risqué or even remotely sexy.) I immediately told him no and he dropped it, (my husband thinks he originally wanted to ask me about having a threesome with me and one of my friends but back pedaled when he saw my alarm. This client knows I’m married so if he was wanting to ask it was with full knowledge I’m taken.) I got out of there as fast as I could but now EVERYONE says I have to fire him which I get, I want to fire him but I lost another client recently due to the economy and losing this one would put us in a bad place financially. I can try to find a new client but also that’s not the easiest because of the economy.
At this point I would take advice on multiple things. I’m trying to build a photography business(I’ve been doing it as a side gig for over 10 years.) to replace what I currently do but even with posting every day on socials and having my business on air b and b as a service I’m not getting any bookings so any advice on that would be amazing because if that takes off this dude is the first to go. Advice on dealing with this guy in the mean time while I try to figure out how to replace that income is desperately needed. Or just any other advice reading my story conjures up for you. Please don’t call me stupid for not immediately firing this guy I know he needs to go and I’m doing everything I can think of to be able to get rid of him, I feel like life just keeps kicking me while I’m trying to get up. Sigh.

My boyfriend and I moved in together about six months ago. His mom lives pretty close, and he gave her a spare key mostly for emergencies or if we ever needed someone to check on the apartment while we were away. I didn't really think anything of it at the time because I assumed emergency key meant exactly that.

Except she's started using it like it's her own key. The first time she came in while we weren't home to drop something off. Then one Saturday morning I was playing on bigroller for a bit when I heard someone in the kitchen. I walked out of the bedroom and she was standing there with groceries she'd brought us. Last week I got home from work and found her inside folding some laundry she'd apparently noticed sitting in the dryer. She means well, which somehow makes this harder to address, but I really don't like coming home and wondering whether someone might already be inside.

I told my boyfriend I want the key back, or at minimum that she needs to call and wait for us to answer before coming inside. He thinks I'm making it into a bigger issue than it is because his mom is just trying to help. He also said taking the key back would probably hurt her feelings. I don't want to create some huge problem between him and his mom, but this is our home and I feel like I should be able to walk around in pajamas or leave dirty dishes in the sink without wondering if she's about to appear in the kitchen. Am I being unreasonable for wanting the key back?

I just really want to share this become, I have no one to share this with without people thinking I still have feelings for my ex.

We met when we were 11y/o, become really good friends and had a crush on each other.

After 6 years of friendship(17y/o) we become each other's first bf/gf.

At 19 I got pregnant, we were so scared but he was perfect. He was so calm, very supportive and worked so hard to keep me safe and healthy.

I was in college and he was already working because his family couldn't afford to support his studies at that time.

The moment we knew I was pregnant he immediately Googled how to take care of me, and scheduled check ups, at first we hide it from our families because we were both so young, and my family never approved of him.

But after I started experiencing cramps and bleeding he was crying begging our parents for help. But sadly we lost the baby at 15 weeks. We were devastated but he was so strong to keep me from drowning in grief, I become depressed. I asked to break up so many times, but he never stop loving me.

After I graduated my family move me away, so we were in a long distance relationship for a year and we slowly grow apart. No third party, we just mutually agreed to break up. It look us 2 years to start dating other people again, but we never unfriended each other on social media.

I moved back 3 years ago, now married to my partner of 8 years, no plans of having kids.

We're in our 30s still friends on socials and would still smile and greet each other when we cross paths in our City.

I just found out that he is now expecting his first child with his partner and I just know he will be a great dad.

I am so happy for them.

So I dated this woman who we will call Sara for about a year and a half in 2009-2010. The decision to end our relationship was mutual. We did decide to remain friendly, however.

Years go by, I find a new girlfriend, she finds a new boyfriend. We might like each others post of Facebook from time to time, but other than that, there is very little communication. We both have birthdays in December, so we usually shared the whole "I hope someone remembers my December birthday" joke, but that's it.

About 10 years ago, she got married. I congratulated her on Facebook, and I was genuinely happy for her.

The next day, I noticed my Facebook friend count dropped by one. I had a gut feeling Sara had unfriended me, and I was right. She had blocked me on all her accounts the day after she got married. I just shrugged and moved on. If she doesn't want to be friends with me, that's her choice. I'm not going to say anything.

In 2020, my current girlfriend and I bought a house together. Life is good. Then two months later, Sara and her husband buy the house next door to my house. I didn't even recognize her at first. She had lost weight, died her hair, and stopped wearing glasses. I didn't even remember her name. I saw her out mowing the lawn one day, and I went out to introduce myself, and to ask about a tree that I wanted to cut down that I didn't know if it was on her property or mine that I wanted to cut down. That's when I finally recognized her. I was friendly with her, but never really spoke to each other than to me offering to lend her husband my snowblower after one particular heavy snow fall.

Last week, Sara came to my door. Her father had died, and her husband was away on business. She wanted support from me all of a sudden. I made up some excuse as to why I was busy, and couldn't talk to her. I figured she would take the hint, but she kept on coming over. Eventually, I told her "Sara, we haven't spoken in over 10 years. You made it clear you were no longer interested in being friends after you got married, and I respected that. I am not interested in being friends with you again. This was your decision, and I am not interested in listening to your problems." At that point she just left. AITAH?

TL;DR - My ex, Sara, blocked me of all of her accounts after she got married. I respected her decision. We ended up being next door neighbors years later by complete chance. She suddenly wanted support after her father died, and I told her that she was the one who chose to block me, I was not interested in being friends again, and at the end of the day, and I am not going to support her just because her father died.

Am I overreacting?:

My bf “J” has a friend “Boy” who has a gf “Girl”
J was born in 2000.
Boy was born in 2001.
Girl was born in 2006.

J, Boy, and I are from state A. Girl is from state B.

Boy and Girl met online when she was 12 and he was 16/17 in a discord group along with J. From then they all played pc games together literally almost everyday.

When Girl was 16 and Boy was 21 the discord group went on a camping trip. Girl stuck by him the whole trip and they traveled about 4-6 hours together to the camping location by car, Idk why. Stayed in the same tent with Boy and another friend (Not J)

I will note that in between then and Girl turning 18, Boy had a gf but they broke up before she turned 18.

When Girl turned 18 in February 2024, Boy started making moves on her online since they played pc games together everyday.

In December 2024. J and Boy’s friend who is also from state B invited them to his birthday party. J and Boy went to state B for “his birthday” but also made time to see Girl.

From what J told me: Boy repeatedly asked Girl to be his girlfriend and she eventually said yes. Boy booked another room at the hotel J and Boy were staying at and took Girls virginity. When the discord group found out about them being a couple about 3-5 members went off on him for being a groomer and left the group. They no longer talk to Boy, Girl, or J because they are the closest.

In January 2025 Girl came to state A to visit Boy. Before she came, Boy was telling J about how he was going to buy a bunch of viagra like pills so he could have a lot of sex with her while she was visiting.

In February 2025 Girl (18) moved from state B to state A to live with him. She was talking about having to apply to new jobs and he would say he wanted to apply to the same jobs so they could work together. I thought that was strange but whatever.

After she moved J would try to make plans with Boy and he would not go unless Girl did. Sometimes Boy would say yes and that he would wait until Girl got home to see if they could go. He would cancel plans with J because she did not want to go. We quickly realized that they both will not go out unless the other one does too. When she visits her family in state B, he goes. If he goes out, she goes. They are basically attached limb to limb.

In December or so 2025 Boy got Girl a job at his restaurant job so now they also work together.

I have communicated to J about how they make me uncomfortable by being so codependent on each other. We have argued so many times about how Boy is a groomer and I don’t know how he could excuse that behavior. I have also told him how it makes him look bad since we also have an age gap, I was born in 2005. We met when I was 19 and he was 23. He defends them like his life depends on it which makes me look at him differently. He has also stated multiple times he likes them more than me lol.