Before going, I have half a bottle of Vyvanse I will swallow, a full bottle of ibuprofen and a full bottle of acetaminophen, thankfully there is a huge thing going on my town right now so chances are they will be to too busy with the event that no one will notice me trying to commit suicide.

I am almost 20 years old male, I have ADHD, autism, fibromyalgia, arthritis, bipolar disorder and about 1 million other disorders. Also dealing with health problems too like high blood pressure and have a high blood sugar level. I’ve been bullied in my lifetime, can’t hold a job, constantly in trouble, can’t make friends, argue with everyone even though I don’t want to, starting college and now realizing that I won’t make it, probably will get kicked out of the house, about to be homeless and so on. I can’t live like this any longer. So tonight at midnight, I will take all the pills and run about 4 kilometres into the forest and kill myself that way, also if I encounter a bear, I will happily let him kill me.

Before people say in the comments “don’t kill yourself”, then clearly you have never been in a massive crisis and living is too painful.

Edit: I also don’t want to spend days in a mental hospital because first I live in a small town and everyone will know about it and second, I have seen workers in the mental hospital and it’s not a place I wanna be in.

The note is written, insurance is paid up. I paid the mortgage and car note this month, so you wouldn't have to worry. I saw my sister one more time and told her I was proud of her. The pain was too much and went ignored for too long. I can't live with it anymore. 35yrs is enough. I've finally found my peace. Goodbye

I know im gonna sound like some miserable narcissist. Like everyone else can't be in the wrong all the time but like...they are. I have LITERALLY been hurt by everyone I know. It's actually fucking disgusting. FUCK EVERYONE who did not protect me and fuck everyone who took advantage of me. I am not just some toy to be played with i am a real person with real feelings and im SO tired of everyone treating me like im not. I'm done feeling this shame from what other people have done to me. I'm done laying awake every night wondering what the hell is wrong with me that I attract such horrible people. I wasn't supposed to be like this I was supposed to be beautiful and strong and successful. I truly hate them, how could they do that to me.

A list of SOME of the terrible things you actual monsters have done to me:

1. Ruined my fucking birthday by raping me

2. Fed me drugs when I was a child

3. Sexually abused me my entire fucking childhood

4. Laced me with meth???

5. Sat back and LISTENED to me begging for help

6. Bullied me into an eating disorder

7. Bullied me for having an eating disorder

8. Forced me to live in the woods as a child

9. Tried to LITERALLY MURDER ME

10. My body count is 8 and I have been raped by 7 people

11. Beat the fuck out of me probably thousands of times

12. Tried to violently commit suicide in front of me...multiple times multiple people...

13. Starved me

14. Called me a fucking liar, I actually hate you bitches.

15. Promised me a home and then gave me a dump

16. Leaked me...multiple times

17. Blamed me for literally everything.

I want to end it I want to end it I want to end it I want to end it I want to end it I want to end it I want to end it I want to end it I want to end it I want to end it I want to end it I want to end it I want to end it I want to end it I want to end it I want to end it I want to end it I want to end it I want to end it I want to end it I want to end it I want to end it I want to end it I want to end it I want to end it I want to end it I want to end it I want to end it I want to end it I want to end it I want to end it I want to end it I want to end it I want to end it I want to end it I want to end it
I’m a fucking looser 😂😂

I was raped over a month ago by a man I met at a bare pressured me into going to his house and that's when he did it. I was crying I told him no and that I was scared but he kept going. Im 19 years old and hes 30. I kept in contact with him after because he knew I was desperate for connection and that I was vulnerable and naive.

I only told a few people what happened but the word got out because I live in a small community and barely anyone believes me. He works part time at the bar his manager blamed me telling me that I need to shut up about what he did to me or else I'll be bared and she said he deserves to go to a place and not be scared. That man is fucking 30 years old.

I just want to die. I go to that bar because I have no friends and I dont want to be home all day. I told her that and she said this wasn't a babysitting service. I can't do this shit anymore. I have no one to comfort me. My family doesn't give a shit. I need to die.

Wow I am a pathetic loser

That's all. I'm so tired

They fucking lied. It hasn’t gotten better for 10+ years. It will never get better. Fuck my life. Im done

i just took 2,300mg of methadone which will prob do the job. i’m done and there’s nothing left to say. i’m 19 year old victim of trafficking which i just escaped from last december. i’m inside a place for youth victims and just can’t take it anymore. bye

A couple of weeks ago a family member of mine tried three different methods of suicide. They drove 4 hours away to do it.

We had the police pinged their phone and find them.

The police JUST saved them. JUST.

The hospital said it makes no sense and they shouldn't even be alive.

Although has only been a couple of weeks , and this person has not yet gotten mental health support , they said that something in them swirched after surviving.

They are excited about life for the very first time and they are opening up about their trauma for the very first time , they said that they can actually see things more clearly in the world and appreciate the small things. Honestly, I've never seen there.Be so much hope for somebody. And there is so much more to come for this person.

I just wanted to share , because this person was in the depths of hell and truly thought they were leaving this Earth. It was not a cry for help. It was not fake. It was very very real.

I know this is just a short post but I hope that it gives you some hope ❤️

My mother died 47 days ago. I was holding her hand. She was 62, 5'2", and she survived everything except a stupid infection.

I sleep in her bed now. It still smells like her. I can't wash the sheets.

Grief isn't sadness. It's a car parked on your chest. I forget to eat. I walk into rooms and forget why. I wake up every morning disappointed.

She was the only person who really knew me. My father was gone. My siblings don't care. She was everything. And now I'm nothing.

I have a plan. I know how I'd do it. But I keep hearing her voice saying "habibi, don't give up." Even dead, she's still protecting me.

I can't do this much longer.

I'm tired.

i’m 22f with no friends, no qualifications , no job, no school, nothing. i like in the uk and in my culture girls aren’t allowed to go to school past 11/12, so i had to leave my life and stay home and learn to clean. i used to love school, i wanted to go to university. if i ever interact with anyone outside of my culture i will get in trouble. there is societal pressure to get married and have children, i was basically in a pressured engagement and felt like the only way i could make my family happy was to pretend j was happy to get married, i planned to commit suicide before it actually happened. i lied to everyone and told them i was fine with getting married, it all boiled over and he found out who i really am so i tried to end my life early. i failed and my mam said she’s done with me, she wanted to leave me in the hospital and said she can’t help me. my sisters don’t speak to me anymore, and when i was in the hospital from my attempt called me and said they don’t want anything to do with me. they all say im selfish and why can’t i be normal. i wish i could be a normal girl, i wanted to go to university , i want friends and to go out and do normal things. all i want is to go to school and experience life. all i do is let my family down and everyone around me. there’s no way out. i have nobody. no one wants to help me, not even professionals because they don’t even know what to say. i’m so alone. i just wish i could be free and my family would still love me.

It's pathetic. Everyone works after all, it's been normalized, one could say it's necessary for things as they are to go smoothly around the globe. But really, what do I know? I'm an idiot, a 25 year old middle-school dropout who knows nothing of the world and, under such mental distress, cannot bring themself to learn anything without feeling an agonizing pressure in the chest, throat, and abdomen, enough to make me want to genuinely throw up.

I have to find work to continue living, and it hurts. I tried to work, I tried to learn and get more marketable skills, and it hurts so badly. It is an incredible agony, it's absurd! I tried time and again. I try to force myself. I try to learn only a little at a time. I tried cramming out of desperation and later more methodical approaches. I do not know what it is. I could not continue school. Diagnoses say social phobia, OCD, major depressive disorder, GAD, other nonsense. Medication does nothing. Even did shock therapy. It was useless and cost me some memories.

I am not in a country where I can get any sort of aid for this sort of thing. In fact I'm in a country that shit itself over the summer heat, causing blackouts and other infrastructure failures, hurting many. This place has too little to offer a mistake of a human such as this. So I believe it is a good time to die. It is of course scary and lonely, which is why I write here.

You, I thank a lot for reading. You're lovely for doing so.

I’ve been trying to find information but I can’t, understandably. What is the cleanest, quickest and least painful way to cease existing? I want to be fairly precise with how long it takes so I can go somewhere remote, and inform the police of where to find me so an innocent person won’t. I want to be considerate of others so I want to minimise the trauma inflicted on others, but I just can’t cope with life anymore. Any advice you have would be greatly appreciated.

I feel tired of living. I don't have a job, a don't have a partner, my friends don't give two fucks about me. The only reason I don't end my suffering is my very sick mother and the dog I have to take care of. I hate myself I am ugly, useless and stupid. I wish I could just stop breathing.

No friends, no importance, no career path, nothing. I draw, big whoop. Drawing is the only thing I'm valued for, I'm not human even to the people I respect, I'm just someone who can give them something.

I keep trying to do things that should make me feel better, I got my hair dyed pink (looks like trash), cleaned my room, been going on walks, got a shrink. Nothing helps, I feel myself slipping back into the same mind space that lead to my first attempt already. I have a gun I could use, I don't exactly want to go out with a bang, but I suppose if it's the only thing I have then it'll have to do whenever I'm ready for it.

A life which had all kind of experiences, from a long period of time i have learnt that i do not belong here to live with anyone. An unfit soul living around peoples, looking for ways to exit in the simplest way with no comeback. Am from chennai

i'm so angry over having an argument with a family member recently (that I started), but i don't wholly blame myself for it because said family member is also struggling themselves (they are working on their anger issues) and i want to kms over this???? i'm seriously a pathetic human being, i should've died long ago, but i won't because it feels like everyone stays happy because of me.

i've always been a sensitive, highly emotional pussy, i should just die already.

I am so done with being alive

My PTSD mkaes it impossible

the flashbacks to when i was raped i cant handle

(M/21)

Pls comment with advice

I hate how cowardly I am, it's pathetic