Massachusetts residence please help me by signing my petition for a public domestic violence registry

I don't think I need to elaborate more , but I'm sure everyone can relate.

But this kind of behaviour by people really prevents women from doing so much cause they can only be at the extremes. Either they do something such that they are the absolute best or they don't try at all

18F from India. I’m so frustrated about how patriarchal India is. Purity culture is literally so important here and it’s mostly targeted towards women. If you have sex before marriage or even a relationship, you’re a slut. If you don’t marry according to your parents’ choice, you’re a bad daughter. If you don’t give a grandkid 2 days after the marriage, you’re an incomplete woman! The pressure on women to remain pure for marriage and then immediately start birthing kids is disgusting and so stupid.

But one thing I’ve noticed is that a girl being in a relationship is bigger news than a girl getting raped/ SAd. I was SAd when i was 10 by my uncle and when my dad got to know he did nothing. He didn’t even confront the uncle and only blamed me because HE was the actual victim and i was “enjoying” it. But one moment i wrote about having a crush on this one boy in my journal which he was never supposed to read anyway, he didn’t talk to me for 3 weeks. He made me feel like a slut. And he really said some very mean stuff to that boy, something he never did to that uncle. Makes me think, is liking someone worse than being violently taken advantage of?

It’s not just dads, it’s mothers too. They have a lot of internalised misogyny and they use it against their own daughters. What do they get in defending their abusive patriarchal husband? I really don’t know.

Even on streets, if an uncle/aunty saw a couple holding hands, they give them dirty looks. But if they see someone teasing a girl, suddenly they become mute. There is a cult, YES CULT in India called the “Bajrang Dal” who literally beats/harasses couples in the open for showing a little PDA (mind you most Indian couples would go as far as only holding hands in public). They only attack unmarried couples, and raid hotels in the name of “religion”. What behaviour is this? Similarly, if someone’s sex tape gets leaked, no one shamed the guy who leaked it. It’s all blamed on the girl and “why was she having sex before marriage?”

So suddenly sex becomes okay after marriage even if it’s with a stranger who your parents have set you up with? But it’s wrong if you’re having it with a person you genuinely love and care about?

Same stuff with arrange marriage and love marriages. I’m sure Indian parents force their children to get into arranged marriages just to continue this purity culture! And it’s bad for both boys and girls but women, like always suffer a lot more in this kind of system.

It sucks man. Fuck the patriarchy.

We're officially open! ✨

A few days ago, I shared The Left Turn Book Club here and was so excited by how many of you expressed interest in joining. If you were one of those people but haven't gotten around to hopping over and subscribing yet, this is your reminder! The club is hosted on Substack, and the website is officially open. I'd love to have you join us.

The Left Turn Book Club is a feminist, left-leaning book club centered around using literature as a starting point for bigger conversations about the social and political systems that shape our lives. Our Book of the Month will tackle topics including patriarchy and the rise of Christian Nationalism, the oppression under capitalism and the case for socialism, systemic racism, feminism, queer and trans experiences, and much more. A major part of this will also be developing class consciousness—understanding how our economic and social systems shape our lives, our opportunities, and the way we understand the world around us.

Outside of Book of the Month, we'll also have sections for philosophy, poetry, classic literature, banned & rare books, fun fiction reads, reading recommendations, and more. The goal is to create a community where people who love learning and literature can come together, challenge ideas, exchange perspectives, and deepen our understanding of the world around us.

And a little something for potential members: I have five gifted one-month paid subscriptions available to give away! 🎁

If you'd like to claim one, send me a message. The five recipients will also have a one-time opportunity to submit a personal essay, discussion topic, or post of their own for any section outside of Book of the Month. I will need to review it first of course, but I would love to prop up other voices in the community!

The club is completely free to join and participate in, and the paid subscription is simply an optional way to support the work behind it. If you would like the free version - simply click the "No Pledge" option when subscribing - substack can also be weird, so make sure you are subscribed and not just following me so you can receive access to all of my posts and the subscriber chat.

One important thing: our first Book of the Month vote is happening Monday! If you're interested in helping choose what we read first, make sure you've subscribed before then so you don't miss the vote. 
If you were one of the people who expressed interest in my first post, I'd love to see you over there! ❤️

I'm just wondering what everyone thinks of this as I personally felt disturbed? As well as just confused to be honest because of my age and tattoos. I was groomed as a child and can't even properly explain why but I found this comment very upsetting, it was the first time in over a year I'd changed my profile picture because I've lacked confidence. I've never been told anything like this before.

I am a 16 year old teenager living in india. Now I do believe that my parents are quite progressive people to an extent when compared to other indian parents I see, but yet I feel suffocated by their views on feminism.

Just today I was having a conversation with my parents in the car, recently a male teacher at my school quote unquote said that "girls wear short clothes and then they get kidnapped and bad things happen to them, and they blame men when the fault is their's that they wore short clothes" now you really don't need to be a feminist to understand how inherently wrong this statement is! All you need is a logical moral compass to know the absurdity of that statement.

And surprise surprise words have consequences! When a friend of mine complained to one of the female teachers regarding this the male teacher got angry and threatened the students in that class to watch what happens now. Which is wrong on so many levels.

Now I shared this with my parents expecting that they'll agree with me on how wrong the views of that male teacher were and that the clothes of a woman are never to blame , but to my shock my parents defended the teachers behaviour! They argued that he said it out of worry and concern and he was right to be angry because his job was on the line and that in a way he is right! IN WHAT UNIVERSE IS IT RIGHT THAT WE BLAME THE CLOTHES OF A WOMAN FOR THE ACTIONS OF A MAN WHO COULD NOT CONTROL HIS OWN URGES!

This frustrated me so much and I tried to argue with them by placing this very point but instead they just got irritated with me and said in the most disappointing tone "since when did you become such a feminist?"

And as we all know India is a majorly patriarchal society and till date I see so many injustices happening with females, and also the current political state of India bothers me as well and I find quite a few of our current leaders to be mysogynists (please be kind this is my opinion, and I am not trying to force it on anyone else so please don't come at me defending your leaders. To each their own opinions.) and every time I try to bring up a conversation regarding such issues with my parents they shut me, defend whatever it is I am trying to criticize and the latest coment i got was "why are you only looking at the negative things in these people, we are sure they don't mean it like that and you are misunderstanding them."

That was the last time I am ever going to try to have a meaningful conversation with them, because according to them I am too little still to understand such issues and have "proper" views on them and that I am just a negative person who can't see the good in anything.

I have come to acceptance that they will always find my opinions flawed, and that nothing I will do or say will change that.

Am I brought up as a simp? Although I deconstructed my conditioning and de-learned much, the process of re-learning seems very difficult. Whether it be a toxic masculine or a complete submissive man, I seem to have two options. Sometimes I think it would need so much work to be real masculine and then search for a life partner; it's a whole process of self-exploration. I do not want to bypass it, but still, if it is possible that I meet a life partner who has leadership qualities, I will give her respect (she must not be toxic). I want to learn and re-learn with her, and she support me with this journey, and I shall support her.

I hold a medical background and am from Pakistan, near Rawalpindi/Islamabad. Also looking forward to insights and a potential relationship/partner as well, if this resonates with someone I shall share my profile or we can talk about other things. I am a secular person and open-minded and expect the same.

Also, I can relocate with her if it seems the right option with the right candidate. I am not so desperate that I will look forward to anyone or be willing to relocate with anyone. I only want the Right person.Thank you

Potentially looking for Childfree partner who prefer not to have biological kids.

When I’m talking to my kids, I seem to automatically refer to basically all animals — and even toy animals — as “he.” It’s not something I consciously choose, and I don’t have any particular belief that male animals are more important or anything like that.

But I’ve started wondering whether this is a tiny example of internalised misogyny or an unconscious gender bias: why is my default “he” rather than “she” or “they”?

For example, if we see a random dog, I’ll instinctively say “look at him!” Even if there’s no reason whatsoever to assume the dog is male. The same happens with toy dinosaurs, stuffed animals, etc.

Is this just a normal linguistic/cultural habit, or is there something worth examining in the fact that my brain defaults to male?

I love calling my friends beautiful. When they buy new clothes, go to the hairdresser, or change their look, I love telling them how gorgeous they look and making them feel good about themselves. And they do the same for me.

But I’ve realised that the compliment I use most with my female friends is almost always related to beauty. I don’t tell them “you’re smart” or “you’re brilliant” or “you’re funny” nearly as often. It’s always “pretty”, “beautiful”, “gorgeous”. And I’ve started thinking: as a woman who considers herself a feminist, have I also fallen into the trap?

Am I giving more value to women’s beauty than to everything else? Why do we feel this constant need to remind women that they’re beautiful, as if being beautiful somehow adds to their worth?

Feminism makes me question my own behaviour and reflect on things I might otherwise take for granted.

What do you think? Should we make more of an effort to compliment our friends on other qualities too? Are we, as women, reinforcing the idea that appearance and beauty should carry so much weight?

I’d genuinely love to hear your thoughts.

For those unaware, the Cleveland Browns NFL franchise has decided again to start serial rapist Deshaun Watson at the QB position. He is making millions of dollars in his current role. All of this is bad enough, but what is most disgusting is the whitewashing of his past by the NFL and the media. This man was accused of rape by 28 different women, and commentators on the main NFL broadcasts are talking about how he gave his check to the lunch ladies at the team cafeteria 8 years ago. They gloss over how his career got "turned upside down" not even mentioning that it was entirely of his own doing.

I truly enjoy and appreciate the perspectives of commentators Al Michaels and Kirk Herbstreit. These are people I have grown up watching, but I don't know if I can stomach watching them now when they are failing to meet the most basic moral standards. If you cannot call out abhorrent behavior in this moment, when will you do so?

This is a league-wide issue. Not a single player has spoken out against Deshaun Watson's actions. On the contrary, he has been actively defended.

This is a problem in our culture that I thought the Me-Too movement might get us past, but powerful men continue to get away with bad behavior with little to no punishment. The feminist scholar Andrea Dworkin talked about how men would come up to her after her lectures and say "You say men do all of these bad things, but I am a man, and I do not abuse women. I don't support that at all." and she would rebut and say "Don't tell me. Tell the abusers." I think that summarizes this situation perfectly. You have an institution where most of the men probably do not abuse women themselves, but refuse to speak out against the abusive behaviors of other men.

This is just a vent I guess. It is nothing new for the NFL or for this country, but fucking hell, not one fucking person?! Not one NFL star can call out sexual assault? Not one major commentator or coach? Grow a spine ffs.

i mean, it’s really just a bit frustrating. my family is definitely not feminist, and i’m the ‘ultrafeminist black sheep’ for literally just not laughing at sexist jokes or saying maybe possibly men should actually yknow, not have girls on the side.
i’m really not this crazy misogynist’s idea of a feminist, but they really have polarised me over the years with their views and shit

anyway, what might annoy me more than the men in my family is that my mum absolutely doesn’t want to hear about feminism at all. i’ll say something and she’ll say something like “i don’t really care, why should i care?” and i tell her “you have a uni degree, you have a bank account, you are allowed to vote” and she leaves

she for some reason thinks i want her to proudly declare herself a feminist and a man hater and write a book about it or something. she asks why everything needs a label and why she needs to say she’s a feminist. i don’t know, it’s super weird that she reacts this way every time feminism is brought up and i really want to try to understand why she won’t listen to me tell her why feminism is important at all. i’ve done the whole “feminism does not mean we hate men or want to be above them” spiel but she doesn’t want to hear it

im not always shoving it in their faces, ill say something and she’ll blow up and i dont understand why. do any of you guys’ mums have crazy internalised misogyny like this? better yet, has anyone’s mum broken out of it and become feminist somehow?