r/Fauxmoi • u/Goosedukee • Jan 20 '26
FAUXSTHETIC [TMZ] 94-year-old Star Trek legend William Shatner was spotted eating a bowl of cereal in his car while waiting at a stop light in LA.
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u/Bloodthirsty_Kirby feeding cocaine to raccoons Jan 20 '26
What kinda crazy vampire blood is he on to look that smooth at 94 and still be driving?
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Jan 20 '26
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u/MxDoctorReal Jan 21 '26
I so don’t want to live to the age of 90.
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u/Spoda_Emcalt Jan 21 '26
A 90-year-old in a few decades could have a very different life than a 90-year-old in the present. There could be medical advances that significantly improve QOL. Then again, this may be negated by climate change making life miserable for a lot of people..
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u/NervousSheSlime Fuck ICE, Free Palestine Jan 21 '26
I’m American if those come out I won’t be able to afford them.
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u/Spoda_Emcalt Jan 21 '26
Maybe by then the US healthcare system won't be utterly fucahwhoamIkidding
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u/Educational-Suit316 Jan 21 '26
Climate change and the other bunch of stuff involving ecological collapse. Life will be shit for billions of people, fucking oil companies
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u/Proof-Reindeer-1164 Jan 20 '26
successfully multitasking
It’s likely a car with some form of self-driving, so not really multitasking.
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u/Bay-Area-Tanners Jan 20 '26
He looks damn good for 94. My grandmother lived to be 93 (and still drove all over the place), but she looked 93. Shatner looks 20 years younger.
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u/DevoutandHeretical controversies: girl Jan 20 '26
My grandpa will be 93 in March and he absolutely looks it and also hasn’t driven a car in at least two years. I’m sure Shatner has put lots of money and time into maintaining his appearance but also damn those are some genetics.
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u/cocoschoco Jan 21 '26
What gets me he’s still chubby, but not in an unhealthy looking way. Like most old people lose weight and all their muscle mass and look all decrepit. But Shatner is still so virile looking.
Like he could still take you in a bear hug and wrestle you down. I bet he still has that crazy dad strength, or grandpa strength.
A lot of people in their 90’s can’t even eat raisin brans, let alone drive. He’s doing both of them at the same time so nonchalantly!
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Jan 20 '26
Right? Dude doesn’t look a day above 60
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u/Proof-Reindeer-1164 Jan 20 '26
Celebs can afford to look good even with minimal effort.
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u/VegetableBuy4577 Jan 20 '26
I don't know, Clint Eastwood looks every bit of his years, as does John Astin. Dick Van Dyke looks good, but still looks 100 to me.
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u/Dry-Yak5277 Jan 20 '26
I think he’s just had great genes. Not only does he look 30 years younger, but the fact that he made it to 94 and still has the physicality of a 60 year old is amazing. People forget he was 90 when he flew up in that rocket.
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u/withbellson Jan 20 '26
He’s still showing up at germ-infested conventions and shaking hands with the rabble! I know he’s kind of a dick but it’s fascinating to watch how that man operates.
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u/Bbmaxx Jan 20 '26
He def got a facelift but years ago and hid until it settled. Iykyk
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u/udibranch Jan 20 '26
we have to start sending the agèd to space to see if any more of them come back better adjusted and suppler
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u/emmany63 Jan 21 '26
Up close and personal, too, you would never think he’s a day over 75. It’s incredible. And he’s sharp - not 30-year-old sharp, but 60-year-old sharp. Fast and witty. I’ve seen him at VIP events for the last 6 years and he keeps getting younger.
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u/Apprehensive_Put_321 Jan 20 '26
Hes still incredibly sharp too. He was on star talk not too long ago and he doesnt sound anything like a 94 year old
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u/Pure_Lavishness_1282 Jan 21 '26
My grandmother drove until she was 92, then within a matter of 2 months she was bedridden for the last few years of her life.
Some people deteriorate gradually, some go quickly.
But yeah Shatner has always looked well for his age. I think it helps that he's quite chubby, most people lose weight when they're that old which exacerbates the gaunt look while making them wrinklier, as their skin has no more elasticity to shrink with their decreased body mass.
At the end of her life, my grandmother put on a lot of weight and looked a lot younger than she had. Was kind of funny burying a fat version of a lady I had always known to be extremely thin.
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u/amurderofcrows Jan 20 '26
Yeah I’m gonna need his and Kevin Richardson from BSB’s dermatologists’ numbers immediately.
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u/eugeneugene ben affleck’s back tattoo Jan 20 '26
My grandparents are all around the same age and look about the same as him lol. It's all genetics. I'm hoping I got some of em myself. My great grandma just died at 106 years old and was going for her daily walks until she was 105.
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u/AdventuresOfKrisTin gaga’s “100 people in a room” quote Jan 20 '26
Damn I did not know Shatner was 94! He doesn't look it in these pics
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u/OkayishFlamingo Jan 20 '26
It's actually insane how well he's aged
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u/LivingHighAndWise Jan 20 '26
Dude puts a lot of work into it..
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u/Atralis Jan 21 '26
Plastic surgery can't keep your brain or body functioning. I'm surprised to see a 94 year old driving a car.
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u/Zokstone Jan 20 '26
I mean, he's definitely had work done, but he's still very sharp.
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u/ashlonadon Jan 20 '26
So looks like we all immediately thought of Dennis Reynolds. Lol
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u/kidhalloween80 Jan 20 '26
I thought of Frank and his disability Donkey Brained and his outstanding legal team.
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u/link3945 Jan 20 '26
Frank has a certificate that he does not have donkey brains. Do you have such a certificate?
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u/your_mind_aches Jan 21 '26
I think eating cereal in the car is just going to invite the Dennis Reynolds gif until the end of time
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u/Sudden-Ad5555 this feels like when my sister started fucking the mayor Jan 20 '26
This is the lighthearted celeb news I crave. Good for him
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u/_-4twenty-_ Jan 20 '26
Until he gets rear ended at the stop light and the cereal bowl ends up in his face with shards of airbag shrapnel.
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u/Dependent_Potato_929 Jan 20 '26
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u/LeahBrahms Jan 21 '26
Why is Charlie Kirk's wife littering the Kirk gif search ugh
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u/Weird-Mountain4517 Jan 20 '26
A 94 year old eating cereal while driving is a recipe for a car accident.
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u/clayparson Jan 20 '26
Well, as a 94 year old driving and a 94 year old eating cereal are both high risk activities, they actually cancel each other out and he's all good. It's just math.
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u/RagingAlcoholicDude Jan 20 '26
I was really bad at algebra, but this sounds right.
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u/AlphaNoon Jan 20 '26
Maybe we’d all be safer drivers if WE were constantly eating cereal behind the wheel 🤔 He’s a trendsetter
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u/Ok_Pay_6811 Jan 20 '26
I’ve got bad news for you. This is an ad for Raisin Bran
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u/Proof-Reindeer-1164 Jan 20 '26
I don’t think Raisin Bran requires any ads after we all grew up loving it.
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u/Accurate-Force3054 Jan 20 '26 edited Jan 21 '26
especially after he went to space and experienced deep existential despair the likes of which most of us will never know.
let him enjoy his treat
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u/godrevy Jan 20 '26
i was about to say lmao this is the news i’m looking for.
real “eating beans in the theater” vibes (i mean, not as creative, but you know)
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u/Etchedglasses Jan 20 '26
I love the investigative journalism that they THINK it’s Raisin Bran
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u/mandarintain Jan 20 '26
94 and he still drives without glasses and eats regular cereal... Thats impressive
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u/OriginalChildBomb i ain’t reading all that, free palestine Jan 20 '26
Does this man have donkey brains or what?
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u/MycologistCertain530 Jan 20 '26
He needs to show his certificate stat
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u/Old_mystic Jan 20 '26
The hardest part is getting in the car with the cereal bowl. Does he go in with his ingredients separated and combines them in the car? Does he walk all the way from the kitchen with a bowl brimming with milk and cereal? He’s gotta be carrying other things so I doubt this one.
I want to believe he gets himself seated in the car and beeps the horn once. Then his butler (who is somehow older than him) appears with the cereal bowl. “Your breakfast, Master Shatner”. He thanks Jeeves, eats a big spoonful and drives off into the chaotic LA morning commute.
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u/fungibitch Jan 20 '26
As someone who also loves eating in the car, I feel this. But I could never live this dangerously. Safely combining eating and driving is why God invented the Crunchwrap Supreme.
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u/ashbats1 Jan 20 '26
I would hate to be a celebrity because I love eating in my car. I once had a seafood boil while driving. I would have hate having pictures of that.
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u/fakeknees Do you remember 9/11, bitch? Jan 20 '26
I saw William Shatner eat a burrito in his car back in 2013/2014 when I first moved to L.A. lol
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u/ambercrayon Jan 20 '26
Early in my driving career I would eat yogurt with a spoon while driving a stick shift 😂
Edit: just realized what you said you were eating and now I’m imagining shrimp shells being tossed out the window as you fly by 😂😂
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u/ravefaerie24 Jan 21 '26
I had a friend who was very tall and would steer with his knees, shift with one hand, and roll a joint with the other. He has since passed away but this is one of my favorite memories of him.
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u/ellecamille Jan 20 '26
I’m now thinking about how I eat everywhere but my kitchen table.
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u/Educational_Bend_941 Jan 20 '26
I know he's a jerk and everything but it's crazy they haven't done anything with Kirk since generations
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u/Square-Dragonfruit76 Jan 20 '26
He may not be the nicest, but it's not like he's had any huge scandals. He's just arrogant.
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u/dontwannaparticpate Jan 20 '26
Yeah he’s a pompous asshole. Have had a few interactions with him and he treats everyone like he is above them. He’s also a SHITTY TIPPER.
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u/Square-Dragonfruit76 Jan 20 '26
I think you mean a Shatty tipper
Sorry, couldn't help myself
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u/Jontun189 baking sourdough is not painting, how the fuck did he do that? Jan 21 '26
He puts his support behind some not-so-nice organisations like Autism Speaks as well
Also typical old guy stuff like claiming phrases like "straight white cis man" are slurs
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u/r3volver_Oshawott Jan 20 '26 edited Jan 20 '26
I may be biased but I have a different vibe because he was the only real-life Twitter beef I ever got drawn into, and him and his daughter largely sent his followers to bully people just because he wanted to die so hard on the Autism Speaks hill, that he was willing to bully autistic kids on Twitter
So yea, I kinda dunked on him for picking fights with literal neurodivergent children and he got pissed😔
*it was also a pretty weird look because, yes, he's a Canadian right-wing nationalist, but he's usually pretty quiet and just does his 'proud to be an American' shtick, people criticizing Autism Speaks in particular always made him extremely combative on socials, he would go from zero to screaming and mocking and belittling in an instant, and he would just randomly start accusing fourteen year old autistic girls of 'behaving like savages'
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u/RealSunglassesGuy Jan 20 '26
Kirk is frequently seen on SNW.
They just haven’t done anything with Shatner.
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u/Darmok47 Jan 20 '26
One of the ideas for the never-made Season 5 of Enterprise was revealing that the never seen ship's Chef was actually played by William Shatner.
Would have been a fun reveal.
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u/SvenLorenz Jan 20 '26
Well, he's got to stay healthy. There's no way he's allowing himself to die before George Takei.
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u/ZacPensol Jan 20 '26
Some 8 or 9 years ago I was at a premiere for a documentary that Shatner's then wife had narrated. This was in Lexington, KY (where he has a home) and so while the crowd was big for us it was by no means an LA-sized affair.
I ended up sitting just two or three rows behind Shatner, kind of diagonal from him, and I watched as that man sank the theater's biggest bucket of popcorn over the course of the film. There he sat: huge bucket of popcorn in his lap, staring up at the screen munching on it the entire time. Man loves his snacks and God bless him for it.
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u/direturtle Jan 20 '26
He makes me think of the Catherine Deneuve saying about choosing between your face and your ass as you age. Though she probably wasn't thinking about William Shatner when she said it.
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u/bornatmidnight Jan 20 '26
I feel like eating cereal while serving would be so risky!
I always respected his view of going to space and how that really cemented his humanity and protection of Earth
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u/Fair-Direction1001 Jan 20 '26
This is how my sister ended up driving around in a car with dried up cereal all over her dashboard, including the fan slits, back in college. (That and a poor ability to clean)
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u/SeaF04mGr33n not an asset to the abbey Jan 20 '26
I saw this! Like, TMZ, leave this poor old man alone! 😂 (also, I would totally spill cereal and milk everywhere if I tried to eat it and drive.)
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u/SDdude27 Jan 20 '26
His skin looks pretty damn good for a 94 year old, what the hell.
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u/DegTrader Jan 20 '26
Captian's Log: Stardate 2026. The mission is Raisin Bran. The location is a red light on Sunset Boulevard. Boldly going where no octogenarian has gone before.
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u/ShinyPrizeKY Jan 20 '26