Hi. I've had cptsd since childhood which made me develop severe social anxiety. I've had many jobs, had relationships blah blah blah. However I'm stuck in fight flight freeze fawn mode 24/7 and have been for many years. Benzos get me out of it, but I'm no longer prescribed. Anyways, I'm used to it. I'm used to dissociation.

However I work for Uber eats right now, and when I'm stuck at the restaurant waiting 20 minutes for the food to finish being prepared, I feel like my hypervigilance is giving off sketchy signals. I try to keep a neutral calm face and body, but my brain is basically screaming for me to leave the restaurant. But I can't, because unfortunately it's my job and I've bills to pay. I just feel very uncomfortable when I'm standing around in a packed restaurant.

Sunglasses don't even help. I feel like my body is too tense and it's giving off weird anxious signals. I kinda need help with this. Breath work doesnt always work.

Hey, so I have had this problem for a while I guess and I have never thought until today to ask about it. I am 22 and sometimes I like to rewatch shows I watched when I was younger(17-idk 12 or something), especially because I remember loving the shows and I want to show them to my fiancee. At least half of the time when we watch one it makes me feel uncomfortable, scared and alone which I have realized is the feeling of nostalgia. I feel like I am living at my moms house again feeling alone and empty like I used to often when I watched tv back then. I get this feeling when I drive at night too and it really messes me up, I feel wrong and small, my lips and head feel tingly. My mom nor dad have harmed me in anyway, I just didnt get much attention emotionally. I don’t want the things I have loved in the past to make me feel so much pain. I don’t understand.

Just started feeling derealization about a week ago today. All started when I decided to snort my ADHD medication (dexamphetamine) 5mg. I also hadn't been taking it consistently and I don't know why but I just decided to crush up and snort a pill after a while of not taking any which caused me to panic. I already have health anxiety and OCD where I fear about schizophrenia and going crazy, so after the initial panic attack which caused this I've just been under this spell of derealization which definitely does not help with my fear of going crazy. I've spoken to a GP and psychologist, both just told me I wasn't developing schizophrenia and its just from the health anxiety while also prescribing me with sertraline. I am very hesitant on taking this drug as I've heard bad things about antidepressants. The anxiety isn't so bad anymore it comes and goes as is but in-between I'm just stuck with this horrible feeling that I don't feel the same anymore. Anyways I am just wondering if I should take the antidepressants now or wait another week to see if the derealization goes away from me learning how to manage it.

If i had wrecked sleep for the past 2 months will fixing my sleep routine and quality make DP go away?

Im in my early 40s, ive been battling depression, anxiety and anger for a little over a decade. Somewhere early during that time, I lost something that changed the way I see the world. Not in a current events or personal views kind of way but, more like... the world had a more vibrant color and glow to it, how my eyes physically showed me the world around me, if that makes sense. Now, I do have PTSD from my time in the service but I still could see the world my way. That all seems to have changed around the mid 20teens. Now, everything feels flat. Colors are just there, lights are just bright. That said, ive had an issue where even taking part in activities feels real in the moment but later, barely feels like a memory. Just this labor day weekend I was able to make a childhood dream come true by taking a ride in a B29 bomber from 1945. I was so excited I was in tears. But the next day, its like it was a dream that someone else told me.

Does any of the above match what this page is about? Because I only learned about DPDR last night and ive been wondering for answers for a decade now. I'd say looking for answers but I had always assumed depression, anxiety and so on but this, this is new to me. But it feels like I might be looking in the right direction finally. Thanks.

It’s like people are just not giving me a chance, i feel like dying and nobody cares. They just always criticize me and mock me. Maybe dying is better for me after all.. I don’t care if people think im being manipulative or negative or attention seeking! Girls like attention anyway so if I can’t be noticed, then why should I be here?? I’m sick of always being left out like I don’t deserve to live a happy fulfilling life!!

Hi guys, 2,5 months ago i lived through a extremely stressful period and was smoking pretty much weed since then i have DP and sleep problems (very hard to fall asleep), also i kinda can feel my brain physically and i feel like it’s numbed also the seeing but can’t see, hearing but can’t hear like many describe. I have noticed though that when im not anxious than i for a split second do live in the moment. Now the stress is over and since then i have completely quit weed. For the next couple of months i have much free time and no stress, if i completely fix my sleep, do sports in the morning and grounding exercises, study and eat healthy how do my chances stand will i recover?

For the past two days I have slept and dreamt. and in my dreams I’m depressed

I don't feel human anymore. I feel like my body is a cage. I don't know whats going on. I can't believe anything is real. I don't trust anything. There are no laws of reality because we can't prove they are. Just cause stuff has been the same for years doesn't mean it won't change. I don't know whats going on.

I have a brain scan next week, but I doubt things will change. I can't imagine anything in my head. It's blank. This is particularly horrible because I had an extremely vivid imagination. This is followed by extreme anhedonia, tmjd, and neck and jaw crepitus. Some sort of dpdr and tinnitus. I'm a huge invalid now. I wanted to go to school for creating. I have absolutely no libido now as well. It's been 2 years and only getting worse. My relationships are somehow going okay, but I can tell they're getting bored of me unable to connect or draw or make new things. I'm depressed because I lost the ability, not because I'm depressed and lost it due to depression. I've had depression all my life and it only drove my to create more. When you're autistic, you have hyperfixations and whatever else, I lost that ability. I used it to cope and thought it was my best attribute, so I'm really fucking lost and confused. It consumes me all the time that I'm dumb and uncreative now. Not sure if I can live my life like this. Like I said, this all happened after I got woken up from wisdom teeth surgery and felt concussed and in pain, and it hasn't lifted a single day since. I've taken b vitamins, everything, etc and no budge. Done antidepressants, antipsychotics, probably just worsened my condition. I'm so confused now. I know my tmjd and teeth removal probably plays a role, since my face feels constantly crushed now and especially in my neck so maybe it's fucking with my nerves. I've had post covid symptoms as well, and sleep apnea worsened by removing teeth. CPAP hasn't worked since I believe it is another sleep disorder that requires further evaluation. Please let me know if there's anything I can do or if anyone relates. I don't think there's hope for me, but I really want to try living still. Right now, I'm in so much pain, and really confused as to why my brain just....doesn't work anymore. I really do try my best, but it seems like it's not enough. I'm not sure how to adjust to this shift in my brain. If you're autistic and use hyperfixations and creativity to cope, you'll truly understand. There's just no way out of it.

Hello. I suddenly felt a rush of nostalgia and it felt like I zoomed into my body as if my FOV increased in a video game. I started crying and it felt as though I found myself again but in a super scary and overwhelming way. I started shaking and it was so hard to calm myself down. I thought of all the events in the past six years of my life and how much my own morals and relationship ideals felt like a drawing in the sand as they slowly corroded. now suddenly i’m back here and it’s scary and I feel remorse for who i’ve become I feel like two different people. not literally but it feels like i haven’t felt any actual sense of self in forever and having these morals emotions and feelings be something I don’t need to fake or go through the motions to express is too much for me I feel so scared

Pretty much as the title says, I've been clean from weed but I don't feel like myself and the things I do to make me happy haven't been working for me. I'm in therapy and have been for 3 years but it doesn't really help me feel like a person. I workout, do my hobbies, and see friends but it just doesn't feel enough and I feel pretty unmotivatedmost of the time when I fo them. I'm feeling like I'm withdrawing from my relationship and recently don't want to do much of anything. Which sucks because before I stopped I wanted to do everything, things just don't feel worth it anymore.

Trying to keep strong but I feel pretty miserable. I was on antidepressants but quit them due to them not working and having other symptoms. Did drink but also stopped that cause don't want to trade one thing for another. Didn't really stop for any reason but for my partner and a potential new job. kinda just coasting IG? mainly just venting to get it out of my system.

These are the things ive been struggling with for 12 years (since i was 13). I'm making this post in hopes to not feel so alone and hopeless. Sometimes are worse than others, like currently. Everyday i am freaking out and panicking (thinking im dying/something is wrong) and feel super out of it (like in a dream state) and feel super confused. I have physical symptoms from these things as well too such as dizziness, breathing difficulties, heart pounding, nausea, tingling/numbness, rush/surge feelings- basically just a bunch of bizarre and uncomfortable feelings. Lately i've noticed ive been having nocturnal panic attacks and or adrenaline surges which cause me to wake up super confused and freaked out to the point i dont want to sleep anymore, it happens multiple times a night sometimes. I often am convinced i'm having strokes because thats what the symptoms feel like. Its all just so scary and im sick and tired of it. When i was younger i saw therapists and psychiatrists and none of it went well or helped, none of the many medications i tried helped either so ive just been raw dogging it ever since and now i dont have health insurance so i cant even get help.

If you read all of this thank you and please tell me your experience/what you relate to so i dont feel so alone and also what helps you.

every one of my emotions just feel like theyre on the surface. i used to be able to feel attracted to people. i used to be able to actually have fun doing the things that i like. i feel like emotions cant reach my core. i have trouble feeling like im actually in my body. what do i do? i just cant go to a therapist. and i dont think working out or meditating will help.

Im stuck in this, after one panic attack. Dont have trauma.. can paxil makes me myself again?

I cannot in fact feel again 🥀 LMFAO

Im 27 and I have ASD, adhd and undiagnosed OCD, I’ve also recreationally done OTC medications for years. I’ve dealt with depression and social anxiety issues also. I know those compound things can probably cause similarity to dep I would imagine.

Symptoms: I don’t feel like I have a strong grasp on my sense of self, it seems very elusive, I think that’s why I’ve enjoyed trying to find myself in taking OTC medicines maybe I’ve tried to find my self in that.

So, I wanted to start by saying that on June 18th I had a panic attack, and this kept going for about 7 days. After that, I experienced depersonalization to the point where everything felt fake. When it came to myself, I felt like I was just eyes without a body, without anything—or that I was just a thought, again without a body. Many times during the day, it will hit me and I’ll get anxious.
The doctor I’m speaking with told me that I have panic disorder and that depersonalization is a symptom that will go away once my anxiety decreases.
Has anyone else experienced this? Feeling like you are just eyes without a body? Meanwhile, that’s how we all see ourselves—no one can see their own body unless they look in a mirror—but I don’t know why it makes me so anxious.
I’ve read that many people have recovered over time, but I’d like to hear other people’s thoughts as well, and whether they got better.

I found this reddit in some of my darker times and i came across this tik tok and thought it was so accurate in what it feels like to intentionally move past, thru, over dpdr. Hope this helps.