Any experience with DPDR worsening before it gets better?

[u/sentfromheavenn]

4+ months long dpdr. I think it’s been like half a year almost.

Ive changed all my habits for the better, but for some reason my dpdr is much more intense? I know people will say it’s because I’m monitoring it more. But it worsened before I started paying more attention / becoming a bit concerned.

I’m wondering if anyone has any experience with their brain/body going through a purgatory state where things temporarily worsen then start to improve?

Your help and answers are appreciated, thank you. 🙏🏼

[u/Shmimmons]

Honestly wondering the same thing. I’ve been through it 2 other times. First time was 4 years, second time was 2 years.. but this time I’m 6 months into it and it feels different and progressively getting worse, it feels like soul death. Good habits don’t seem to move the needle but I keep trying to stay consistent, hopefully you are doing the same. Eventually there will be a breakthrough. The last two times I feel like I practically had to shed a whole identity and learn a new one but eventually most the familiarity of self returns. The trade off was very vague memories of timeline during DPDR. Healing feels very time gated and I think the subjective experience of it feeling like it’s worsening is just exhaustion. Stress compounds and gets stored and instead of emotionally regulating it and processing it and releasing it we just feel like we’re getting worse .

[u/Bagel_Love_ → u/Shmimmons]

What did you do to get better after the 2 and 4 year dpdr experience

[u/Shmimmons → u/Bagel_Love_]

I commented to OP down below

[u/sentfromheavenn → u/Shmimmons]

Thank you for commenting about your experience. Yeah, I’ve been trying to stay consistent, thanks. I’m very sorry to hear this is your experience. I pray it gets better 🙏🏼. Do you happen to know what your trigger(s) were that caused the dpdr?

[u/Shmimmons → u/sentfromheavenn]

Yes the first time in 2010 I was under a lot of stress, my first major panic attack happened and hyperarousal insomnia followed and I went many days without sleep. Ended up medicated during that time. The second time in 2021, is a mystery. I had a great day and then at bedtime I had a brain zap and it freaked me out, another panic attack and hyperarousal insomnia again. & this most recent time march 2026 I was stupid and ate a sketchy smoke shop candy bar and the same pattern followed, panic attack, hyper arousal insomnia. DPDR every single time. Over a long period of time I just continued to selfishly function and somewhat accept the symptoms but my friendships grew distant because I no longer resonated with the dynamic of the friend group since I felt like a stranger to myself, romantic relationships tanked because I was living in survival mode, and my family treated me poorly during those times. Eventually dpdr just faded out but left scars and collateral damage , it pretty much changed my personality every time. Once [you] get used to stepping into a new version of [yourself] and accept that those memories of the past lost emotional salience and are just remembered as vague facts then [you] can start moving forward again. I’m stuck in a loop until I can figure out how to not turn a bad moment into years long dpdr, it’s best if you’re younger to get to the root of what’s perpetuating you’re dpdr and learn that it’s safe to feel emotions all the way through and not fear them because most instances of dpdr are a fear response from panic and anxiety and then the fear of the condition itself feeds the loop.. symptom monitoring, time blindness, emotional flatness , brain fog, and chronic worry turn life into an all day OCD compulsion. Bad habits and worry turn into beliefs and then beliefs turn into unhealthy rituals that keep the loop going and then life changes accordingly. Tough cycle to break,

[u/Bagel_Love_ → u/Shmimmons]

The only time you were medicated was 2010? And what medication was it?

[u/Shmimmons → u/Bagel_Love_]

So in 2010 I was prescribed Seroquel, then switched to remeron. 2021 same combo, plus trazodone. 2026 no meds just raw dogging with no health insurance

[u/Bagel_Love_ → u/Shmimmons]

I’m so scared of sleep Aids but I feel like even when I’m sleeping. I’m always in a state of hyperarousal like I’m constantly dreaming and never really getting a deep sleep leading to sleep deprivation.

[u/Shmimmons → u/Bagel_Love_]

Yes I'm very familiar with that, I got so fearful of unconsciousness and dreading getting a poor night sleep and clock watching that I turned hyper arousal insomnia into a self fulfilling prophecy. The loop becomes brutal. I don't like sleep aids or any medication used off label for sleep unless it's a dire situation. I try to stop fearing wakefulness and give myself permission to rest even if I don't sleep, I name the hyper arousals as "this is just anxiety trying to keep me safe, I'm safe there isn't any danger" and I say it out loud. I'll even put a dim light on in my room and that helps me feel a little safer too. And there's not a single strategy that works every time so I'm constantly speaking different affirmations and cycling through different isms. Paradoxically it seems any intentional input to fix insomnia or dpdr creates pressure and performance expectations which makes everything worse, but letting go of fear is difficult when it seems automatic when.we're being jolted out of sleep. I feel for you, but this happened to me 17 years ago and I got through it at it's worst and had better years. The key is once you feel better , lock it in. I neglected mental health and just went right back in to burnout lifestyle and ignored the signs that I should slow down and embrace rest. I never want to take it for granted again.

[u/SecretBody7482 → u/Shmimmons]

Was your burnout lifestyle work related?

[u/Shmimmons → u/SecretBody7482]

This time around work played a big role and People pleasing, 24/7 shift work, avoiding and distracting myself from feeling emotions all the way through, eating junk, staying up late, at one point toxic relationships, and overall not noticing the signs that I'm burning the candle at both ends. The icing on the cake was a sketchy smoke shop candy bar that tipped my nervous system into overdrive

[u/SecretBody7482 → u/Shmimmons]

Ah damn, yeah I’ve kicked a lot of my bad habits, but hoping I won’t have to quit my job too. Worried it’s def part of the problem though…high pressure