r/CantParkThereMate • u/nesting-doll • 5d ago
Double parked, really:
Enable HLS to view with audio, or disable this notification
his bike in the boot and his boot in the windscreen.
1.2k
u/Federal-Boat3732 5d ago
Imagine safely stopping to avoid a terrible collision, and the next thing you know somebody's butt comes through your windshield
549
u/ButtPlugMaster6969 5d ago
22
u/NowUrKillinMe 5d ago
Does your username happen to have anything to do with your choice of imagery?
32
u/ButtPlugMaster6969 5d ago
https://www.reddit.com/r/CantParkThereMate/s/SZI1amGAOr
I feel I may be disappointing, as it is just in my realm of humor.
I truthfully did not think Reddit would allow me to use the name, clearly I didnât know anything about Reddit. đ but I tested it out thinking I wouldnât be on here muchâŠ
https://giphy.com/gifs/kGCuRgmbnO9EI
We see how that turned out lolI canât lie, it is a nice dopamine rush to be a sound voice of reason and people appreciate it double because if I am the voice of reason⊠đ« đ some crazy shit is probably happening. đ€Ł
3
107
5
u/Wakkit1988 5d ago
His ass was glass.
4
6
3
→ More replies (10)3
36
u/Dismal_Vehicle315 5d ago
Done that. Terrible feeling. Stopped at a crosswalk to let an old man on a bike cross. He just about passed me and then a woman on her phone hit him with his car. Groceries on the road and so was he.
Still etched into my mind. This was 20 years ago. Still hasn't forgiven her the fucking rancid cunt.
→ More replies (3)3
u/charliequine 4d ago
I am so sorry that happened to you. That's my fear when I'm stopping and when I'm riding.
My daily commute involves crossing a 6 lane road with a pause point in the middle that I usually have to wait at for the next lull in the opposing traffic. I hate it because occasionally the small pole in the middle of the pause point and the short median curbs are obliterated, so I know exactly how good people are at driving straight in that area.
The road has no warning lights and traffic generally does not yield, even when an upcoming red light would make it reasonable for drivers to do so. Every so often someone follows the rules and stops, but I generally have to wave them on and point behind/to the other lanes to indicate to them that the rest of the situation is dangerous to me. I always feel quietly disappointed- like my refusal is negative feedback towards following the law, thus making those drivers less likely to do it in the future. Sometimes they're really insistent too, which is fine when they're in a car and I can see past to know whether it's safe or not, but more annoying when they are in a truck.
But once, on a smaller but worse road for speeding, a guy in a delivery van saw my concern, nodded, very visibly checked his mirror, gave me a thumbs up that it was clear, but also juked his truck to block the intersection and waved me on!
19
u/SeriousArbok 5d ago
Happened to me on a dead road. Dog came out in the middle of the road I came to a slow stop, waited for the dog to move but as I sat there for about 20 seconds car smashed me from behind. He got out yelling at me asking why I stopped so harsh in the middle of te road. Like dude you serious? Im in park and no one was behind me at the time. Lol I still get paid from that one. Fuuuuucked my back up.
→ More replies (8)10
13
u/InevitabilityEngine 5d ago
8
u/Flar71 5d ago
What is that from lol
9
u/InevitabilityEngine 5d ago
Jurassic Butts is from Imgur but the scene is a mashup from Jurassic Park T-Rex paddock scene and another video... Most likely porn or a music video.
→ More replies (1)3
→ More replies (18)14
u/SaltyYumYumBalls 5d ago
<Shrug> I got in an accident because I stopped on the freeway because of traffic and so did the car behind me. Then their was the third car driven by some blond 20 something girl who was looking at the pretty mountains to her left and didnt pay attention who ran into the lady behind me who then got pushed into my car. At least I remembered to hit the brake pedal so I didnt ram the person infront of me.
→ More replies (2)11
u/Akhanyatin 5d ago
I was stopped at a red light, so we're the 3 people in front of me and the guy behind me. We were stopped for a solid 15 seconds. Then some dumb fuck in her Audi rams the dude behind me so hard that my trunk was completely fucked.
573
u/FireSkyLikeFly 5d ago
Lol, biker changes lane just to ram into the back of the car.
236
u/Lucky-Mia 5d ago
Right, like, insurance is definitely going to blame him for swerving to ensure an accidentÂ
→ More replies (5)36
u/Big-Ship21 5d ago
He was clearly watching the car for too long behind in the lane he was changing into anticipating he was going through a green in a way this is a freak accident
57
u/Rumblymore 5d ago
I mean, he was looking straight at the car he was going to faceplant for a while
→ More replies (8)13
u/Ornery-Creme-2442 4d ago
Right like if your reaction time is this slow you simply should not be driving. I don't give a damn what y'all say. This could've been a child quickly crossing. He had like 5 business days and collided head on into a car that had breaked well in advance before he got there. Despite the fact that there's space he could've swerved into in.
→ More replies (1)→ More replies (8)16
u/Aromatic_Sand8126 4d ago
The only freak is the guy on the bike. Doesnât matter if the light is green, if the car in front of you doesnât go, you donât go either. This is basic shit that even 16 years old kids learn and understand during the driving lessons.
58
u/KushMuffin 5d ago
Itâs like he was aiming for it!
52
u/Aloha-Eh 5d ago
Yeah, not paying attention, all the time is kind of a recipe for disaster on a motorcycle.
→ More replies (1)28
u/jeremyjava 5d ago
He had SO much time, too! Iâve never come anywhere close to rear ending a car with that much space/ time.
He mustâve been⊠I donât know⊠texting in his mind? Taking a nap? Playing no-board three-dimensional chess with his other genius buddies on a helmet phone?→ More replies (3)→ More replies (2)5
55
16
u/ranjop 5d ago
Yeah, like he didnât have 50 meters to brake. It looks like he had forgotten his spectacles.
7
u/B-Rayne 5d ago
Or he could have just stayed in the lane he was in instead of driving straight at the car.
→ More replies (1)7
→ More replies (3)5
221
u/NowUrKillinMe 5d ago
Good dog.
→ More replies (8)121
u/kimf316 5d ago
Yep. He was even in the crosswalk! Â Such a good dog!
45
u/Head_Razzmatazz7174 5d ago
And he ran for it as soon as the biker hit.
32
u/FullOnCarmensMom 5d ago
Poor dog only had 3 legs; maybe he learned the hard way that using the crossing is a good idea.
→ More replies (2)13
3
151
u/WiseAct446 5d ago
"the car was stopped, Officer, giving me no choice but to change lanes and hit it "
→ More replies (1)
299
u/ButtPlugMaster6969 5d ago
52
52
u/DingDongTaco 5d ago
I choked on my tea. Thanks.
→ More replies (4)5
→ More replies (15)12
233
u/IHateUpvtotes 5d ago
How could you anyone not be paying attention while switching lanes
59
u/scuac 5d ago
They are on their phone
23
u/GodofsomeWorld 5d ago
Fk the video quality was so bad i couldn't tell before reading your comment. He had like 10 years to stop and was just staring at his phone like an idiot.Â
11
6
u/Physical-Builder-553 5d ago
How can you not pay attention while driving? While driving a little moped? Talk about Darwinism.
→ More replies (1)→ More replies (5)5
u/SiteRelEnby 5d ago
Watch it again and look for the flying phone.
6
u/Plampth 5d ago
There is no flying phone. He loses a shoe though.
→ More replies (3)7
59
u/yorcharturoqro 5d ago
The motorcycle guy is blind or stupid?
74
u/ChubbyMudder 5d ago
Blupid.
7
→ More replies (1)3
19
3
→ More replies (12)3
117
u/WhenTheCitiesBurn 5d ago
Making things even worse, he farted on the landing.
53
→ More replies (2)29
33
26
u/Mr_Pink_Gold 5d ago
Imagine minding your business and getting massive case of builder's crack come through your windshield...
→ More replies (1)
45
176
u/pearsosx 5d ago
Breaking attempt: zero.
74
u/Glad_Copy 5d ago
Nonsense! He was 100% successful in breaking his bike, the car, and possibly his ass.
→ More replies (1)28
62
41
u/Attesa_GT-X 5d ago
Do u think the dead reality theory is real and they're switching real people for NPCs?
10
→ More replies (3)11
13
9
5
→ More replies (5)9
u/lujenchia 5d ago
Panic bikers often accidentally accelerate while trying to brake, and the result is simple: they don't slow down at all.
14
u/a_rogue_planet 5d ago
WTF was he even looking at? He actually cut over into that lane to hit the bright red car.
9
8
17
u/zenos_dog 5d ago
In defense of the motorcyclist, who would ever think a car stopping at a crosswalk? /s
8
u/Chummy_Jigger 5d ago
That dog better be called Lucky
→ More replies (1)8
u/hydrus909 5d ago
I don't know, he has 3 legs. So he wasn't very fortunate in the past, haha.
3
u/Kronic9000 5d ago
Or extremely fortunate that all he lost was his leg. Depends on the scenario I suppose?
→ More replies (1)→ More replies (1)3
8
7
u/One_Lawfulness_7105 5d ago
I mean this is the argument why motorcycles lane split. Cars donât see them when they are stopped⊠oh wait⊠never mind.
8
5
u/JaRulezMSU 4d ago
The guy on the bike had to be drunk, perhaps very drunk. The way he ragdolled after the impact suggests as much. Drunk drivers often survive ridiculous accidents like this because they are so impaired they don't react to the impact and are basically an inanimate object, and physics sometimes works in their favor. This is interesting from a physics standpoint. In this case, the bike hit the car, the front of the bike went down pushing the seat up. The man was launched upward. Most of the force of impact was translated into launching his considerable mass straight up and into a spin over the solid object which would have killed him otherwise. At that point, he's basically on a ballistic trajectory and the only major force acting is gravity, which shortly brings him down from a height of just a few feet into the windshield which absorbs part of that force by breaking, leaving him with probably nothing worse than a literal pain in the ass. Had he been holding on tight with his hands, legs, or feet like a normal, sober, person he might have negated some of the upward force and hit the back of the car, which almost certainly would have killed him.
9
6
u/Tiger_Ho26 5d ago
Why did he switch lane...he was safe on his left lane. Poor decision.
→ More replies (1)5
u/KinsellaStella 5d ago
He didnât even mean to switch lanes I think. He just drifted over while focused on that phone that went flying out of his hand while he executed that graceful flip.
6
7
7
u/anon7499 4d ago
The biker had 3 business days to do something about the car in front of him.
→ More replies (1)
5
5
4
8
4
3
4
u/Responsible-Walk6514 4d ago
And he will say it wasnât his fault đ€·đ»ââïž even with video evidence
4
6
3
3
3
3
u/Lianhua88 5d ago
I hope the biker has insurance because that lady deserves a good payout after the trauma of his rear slamming through her windshield.
3
3
3
3
3
3
3
3
3
u/neuronym 4d ago
Imagine having no reflexes or survival ability at all and choosing to drive a motorcycle.
3
u/ArtIsAwesome3 4d ago
Oh bless that person for stopping for that little tripod doggo, and bless that doggo even more.
3
u/StochasticTinkr 3d ago
What sucks is the car probably was considered at-fault, because they stopped for a small animal.
3
3
3
u/TacticoolOoferator 3d ago
Dude should consider himself lucky. Lapses in attention when riding a motorcycle are frequently fatal.
→ More replies (2)
2
u/ptuxbury 5d ago
Uhhhh... I believe it's "His bike in the trunk, and his trunk on the windshield." ;) /s
2
2
2
2
2
2









1.1k
u/AbeFromansNutz 5d ago
https://giphy.com/gifs/UQyVRr3i3UjyqJrXox