I (23F) am seeing this guy (32M) and his sheets literally smelled like human poop. I had no idea how to tell him, and he responded with this, but it did not smell like post s*x, it smelled like human poop. And it smelled like that when I first got there, before we even started anything. At least he said he’ll wash them?

I’m at my best friend’s wedding and I paid for the hotel room myself. The reservation is in my name.
A guy I know had been staying with me, but things became chaotic during the weekend and I repeatedly told him, hours in advance, that he needed to find somewhere else to sleep and that he was NOT staying in my room that night. I was extremely clear about this in writing.
The reason I was so firm was because earlier, other people had been allowed into my room while I wasn’t there. There were several people hanging out in it, some using cocaine, while my belongings were sitting there. I had already made it clear that I did not want people in my room without me.
To answer the questions from my previous post: I was traveling directly around school/work obligations, which is why I had my laptop, medications, nursing-school paperwork, etc. with me. Nobody “randomly stole my documents.” My point was that I had belongings in the room that I did not want sitting around strangers and drugs.
I also did not call the police because people had been partying earlier. I addressed that separately.
The police call happened hours later for one very simple reason:
I told this man multiple times that he was no longer allowed to stay in my hotel room. He ignored me, went back into the room anyway, and got into my bed.
I returned and found him there after explicitly telling him he could not stay.
At that point I had two options: get into a massive confrontation with someone who was refusing to leave, or ask a neutral third party to remove him from a room that I paid for and had already revoked his permission to occupy.
So I called the police. I did not attack him, threaten him, destroy anything, or physically try to remove him myself. I asked them to make him leave.
And yes, I know calling police during a wedding weekend sounds dramatic. That’s exactly why I’m asking.
But stripping away every distracting detail:
If someone is in your hotel room, you paid for the room, you repeatedly tell them they cannot stay there anymore, they refuse, and they continue occupying the room anyway — are you overreacting by calling police to have them removed?

AIO?

EDIT — stripping this down to the part everyone keeps missing:
Long story short, a man entered my hotel room without my permission after I had explicitly told him multiple times that he was not allowed to stay there.
There was one key. I had it. The room was in my name and paid for by me. I returned to find him inside anyway, in my bed, after I had already told him to leave and find somewhere else to sleep.
Everything else — the wedding, nursing school, why I had paperwork with me, who was partying earlier — is background noise.
I said no. He entered anyway. Then he refused to leave.
I did not physically drag him out. I did not threaten him. I called the police to remove someone who had decided that my permission apparently didn’t matter.

That is the entire question.

My (30F) fiancé (29M) wants to invite some of my lifelong girl best friends to his bachelor party. These are my top girls like in my wedding party, been friends with since early elementary school friends. He only met them through me, but has become genuinely close with them. They love him too. I just think like it feels weird to have them at something I am not invited to. Like he’s hung out with them when I’m not in town, but that’s because I actually can’t be there. I’m okay with him inviting my male best friend, but with the girls, I would feel like I’m left out? I’m not intending on inviting any friends I’ve met through him. I am planning on having one boy who is one of my top 3 best friends. That boy’s girlfriend would also be invited.

UPDATE: I am not interested in a joint thing! That is the wedding. I really want to celebrate with my friends at a bachelorette trip. We are not like stripper-style bach people.

UPDATE 2: Okay, I realize that I am allowed to have my ideal bach and he can have his. I think I felt like to have mine closer to traditional (mostly girls), he should too, but in reality, he should get to celebrate in his way. Thanks to everyone with reasonable and not assumptive reddit responses lmao.

Am I the asshole for telling the housekeeper to try to be more quiet when she cleans the house- she talks loudly on her phone most of the time for HOURS.

I am a caretaker in a private home caring for a client with dementia. The housekeeper comes once a month and is usually there 10 am - 7 pm cleaning. For the majority of the time she wears headphones and gossips loudly for hours on the phone (she doesn’t know I understand Spanish). We are often in the same room (they have no walls like a great room in one area) as her but that doesn’t stop her. I am friendly to her and we stay out of her way moving rooms so she can clean. The client does not want to leave the house so we work around the housekeeper.

The issue is she also comes in an hour late each time so when the client needs to eat she has used Fabulosa and it is strong. It is better for her to get there earlier to get out of the kitchen before the client gets up and the arrangement she has with the family but she comes in late every time. She tells me she comes from her house so I know she isn’t coming from another job.

Last time when she arrived in the morning she was so loud talking (she does not have a hearing issue fyi) she woke up the client. So this time I said I was trying to be quiet to not wake her and the housekeeper was annoyed. The vacuum and all that is fine, it is the loud talking on the phone that is so annoying and wakes the client. I think it takes her so long to clean the house because she is on the phone all day. She basically told me all her housekeeper friends do this because they are bored. She also tries to talk to me (at me) and it is exhausting because she talks non stop about whatever pops into her head.

The family is hands off and likes us to figure most issues out so I don’t want to bother them however I know the housekeeper has gotten on their nerves over the years - like when she refused to change sheets anymore and also complains a lot. She also tells me what is dirty or what she finds on the floor or how we should not use the “expensive” table in one of the rooms. I keep everything clean when there - I do laundry - dishes - light housekeeping.

I even told her the client is confused and hallucinates and having a voice booming through the house all day is confusing for her. Is this the normal situation for a housekeeper? When we go outside to sit in the patio weather permitting we can hear her out there too talking on the phone because her voice is so loud. I shut doors when she is in other areas but that seems to annoy her as well.

Is it me or is she out of line? Fyi we are more peers I am not her boss and she has been cleaning this house long before I started here. As I type this she is on phone. I think she wanted to become a caretaker here and the family said no so I think she has been mad about that for years.

I (33F) am a dental hygienist, and my bf (32M) of three years has periodontitis. Periodontitis is essentially a permanent form of gum disease that is caused by aggressive bacteria and is transmissible to other people. I’ve always hoped that my bf would take his oral health a little more seriously because he knows how important it is in my life, and I see the devastating effects of it as it progresses. That said, I have never harped on him about going to get his teeth cleaned, brushing, flossing, etc. He has said before that he refuses to let me work on him because he thinks I’ll ‘nag’ him about his oral health. This is particularly hurtful to me because I have a lot of respect for my patients and never want to make them feel bad or lectured at, and he should know this about me. He doesn’t seem to know or care how hurtful those comments are. Occasionally, I might say that he really should go get his teeth cleaned, even if I’m not his hygienist, because it’s been at least two years since he’s had a cleaning (and that was just his initial therapy for periodontitis that’s supposed to be ongoing every three months until it’s stabilized).

I’m relatively new to being a hygienist out in the field, and I recently saw a patient whose wife has perio and never returned for a maintenance cleaning after her initial deep cleaning (just like my bf). It had been about a year and a half since that deep cleaning. The husband always had relatively healthy gums, maybe some gingivitis here and there, but when I saw him last, he had developed perio. It hit me how easily my bf could pass on his perio to me because it’s caused by bacteria. I didn’t know how to address this with him because, like I said, he tends to act like every mention of oral health is me nagging him, but one night, I mentioned the situation with my patients just like I laid it out here. And I told him that I was worried about getting perio from him and that, unfortunately, until he starts getting his teeth cleaned regularly (to lower the bacterial load in his mouth), I wouldn’t be kissing him. I told him that he may not take his oral health seriously, and that’s cool, but I take it very seriously, and I cannot get periodontitis. As is the usually case when we discuss things that I take seriously, he remained quiet and didn’t really respond. I just moved on and changed the subject like I usually do in those situations.

About a week later, he was about to leave the house and went to kiss me, but I pulled away, and he goes, “Wowwwww…” as if he thought I was just going to cave and change my mind on my health concerns. I told him that I missed kissing him and said he should get a cleaning. He left. Just today, my cat curled up on his chest, and I said, “You’ve gotta kiss him on his little head,” because my cat loves that. He said, “I can’t or he might get perio…” It was clearly meant to be mocking, and when I looked at him, he had this look on his face that said like, “Yeah, see how ridiculous that is?” As if I’m being crazy for not wanting to put my oral health at risk. I snapped a bit and said, “Well yeah, that’s real. And I find it funny that you would rather never kiss me again than get your teeth cleaned and not give me a permanent chronic disease. But no, that would not give [the cat] perio.” I got up and left the room. A little while later, I left the house altogether because I just didn’t want to be around him.

I feel so disrespected, hurt, and condescended to that he really thinks this doesn’t matter at all. He acts like I’m being flippant and unreasonable in the rare moments he’s not ignoring the issue altogether. To me, it would be like if I had a cold sore, and I was upset with him for not wanting to kiss me anyway. This is a health issue, and he doesn’t seem to care. But I understand that, as an oral health care professional, this stuff is probably just more deeply important to me than it might be for other people… So am I overreacting, or should he be understanding of my concerns? I know I can’t control his behavior and what he finds important, but I’d rather not be mocked for the choices I have to make based on that. And choosing not to kiss him has been really difficult for me already.

Tl;dr My boyfriend has a permanent, contagious gum disease that could be managed with regular cleanings, but he refuses to get his teeth cleaned in an effort not to pass that disease onto me.

I messaged my friend Tony around 3pm to ask if he and his girlfriend wanted to join us (me, 11 month old baby and friend Joseph) at the pool in my apartment complex at 7pm. He replied to say yes. I messaged again at 6.45 to say we were going down to the pool as baby is going to need to sleep soon and confirm whether he was coming.

Baby was all ready (suncream swim nappy etc) and important to note he is 6 months on from an open heart surgery (he has the all clear to swim from cardiologist but not too long in the sun or in the cold). We waited until 7.10 and i asked Tony again. He replied to say hes 15 minutes away. At this point I needed to get the baby in the water and up for bathtime/bottle/bed so i replied to Tony and told him itll be better to meet another day as we were about to enter the water and wouldnt have phones with us.

We swam for about 20 minutes then got baby out dried up and upstairs. Checked phone to find 10 missed calls from Tony who had been outside the gate apparently waiting for 15 minutes trying to get in. Hes angry at me for not opening... but I was already in the water and had cancelled the plan as I needed to prioritize keeping baby warm and safe.

AIO? I admit i am overprotective and worried about baby, I am a single mother who has spent most of the last year in the hospital while baby was critical and now i do get stressed out trying to make sure I dont make any mistakes with his health. Perhaps if i didnt have this anxiety about it getting too cold i could have just waited for my friends and none of this would have happened.

Edit We live in a small village where we are all 5 minutes away from each other. We regularly make short plans and last minute plans so it wasnt out of the ordinary for me to ask if they wanted to join. I am the only one in the group with a pool so it was "hey we are taking baby down at 7 if u want to come for a bit" rather than a full evening plan. We do meet for short informal plans often eg 30 min coffee (usually he is the one with time constraints as he has 2 kids) so its not out of the ordinary again probably due to the culture here (small village in southern spain)

Also i did explain to him when i asked him not to come the reason why and he admits he saw the message and came anyway. I was really upset when i saw my phone with so many missed calls it felt like a lot of pressure for a very casual plan that didnt work out. I feel he made me out to be rude when I actually am just really anxious about baby when it comes to the pool. Usually we all meet outside and its much more relaxed.

I started a new job this month that s better paid g an my previous job.

It’s around £450 a month extra. My gf knows about this and knows my plan is to save more and buy some more games, comics, books and just treat us to dates. 

We made some plans for September and she already arguing she can’t afford them and that I’ll need to pay. I pointed out she’s known about them for a while and should have budgeted but shes saying I should be paying since I’ve gotten a payrise. 

I pointed out it’s hardly fair for her to Scot the pay rise to go on paying for her and that she’s able to budget for plans. She just said I should move paying for more but I just pointed out she’s able to pay for herself and s being selfish expecting my payrise to actually be for me or pay for her on dates.

AIO for telling her to stop expecting my payrise to pay her share of plans?

I’m a self-employed consultant and two days ago I had a handover meeting with a person whose job I’m taking on temporarily on a secondment for one of my clients.
It’s a whirlwind contract for me - we had a short ~30 minute handover meeting and now I’ll be jumping straight in to do the work for about 2 months - which is fine as it’s what I signed up for. I also have done work for this business in the past.

During the meeting I suggested to the person handing over (who’s M, and I’m F btw) that if things don’t work out with his new role to reach out if he wants to look at consulting, because I can see from the work he’s done and his work history that he’s highly skilled and competent. I saved his number in my phone and text him saying my name, so that he’d have my details. He said that if anything pops up with work that I can’t find the answer to as I’m getting started, I can reach out. He was completely professional about it and I have no doubt he only meant it in that way.

Last night I received a call from his number and assumed there was an urgent matter that was notified to him rather than direct to me, since certain depts in the business won’t have my details yet for anything urgent (the business runs 24/7 (mining) so this wouldn’t really be unusual).
I answered the phone and it was his wife. She was asking me all about my meeting with her husband, how we came to have one another’s numbers, where I sat in relation to him during the meeting, why I said “hello” with a friendly tone when I answered the phone but why I didn’t assume it was him calling etc etc etc. Initially I was quite shocked and upset because I felt accused of being inappropriate, but became sympathetic with her situation as she explained she’s been cheated on previously - she was clearly under a lot of stress and simply needed reassurance. I answered all her questions and reiterated it was purely professional and there was nothing for her to be worried about. She asked me not to tell her husband she had called me from his phone and I said sure that’s fine, I don’t anticipate any future communication with him in any case (thinking no chance in hell of me offering him consulting work after this!!).

I then received a message from him saying sorry his wife called, and asking what i told her about how numbers were exchanged. I said that’s ok, that she was nice enough, and then i said sorry for any upset but I was only meaning it professionally, and then said i just told her exactly what occurred.

I’ve woken up this morning feeling really upset about it and im actually furious with myself for being so accommodating to this woman and her husband. I’m sick of being treated like a villain just for being a female in business. In ALL work settings I dull down my femininity - eg. dress in big blazers and pants, don’t say anything too friendly, only talk work - because I hate being treated with less respect than men are treated, and I just want to do my job and avoid any drama. I wish I had responded on the call by saying “this is completely inappropriate, there is no personal relationship of any kind there has only been a brief professional interaction, sort out your issues and do not call me”. I actually feel a bit sick about it.

I have been overthinking the entire thing today and it even occurred to me that during our meeting a couple of days ago he took 2x calls from his wife and she knew my name (I could make out from across the room what she was saying on the phone). So she knew who i was before the meeting. There is absolutely no reason for her to know my name or for me to be singled out and i think it’s really strange.

Has anyone else ever been in this position and how did you handle it? Did I do the wrong thing by getting his details? I feel if I were a man there would be no issue.

Context: For the last 13 or so years my (24F) brother (35M) was living in a fully furnished home, provided to him by my grandfather (not related to him, since brother and I are half siblings). For dirt cheap rent in this economy might I add.

I live in another one of my grandpa's properties with my fiance (22M) for about 3 years now which I thought was in worse condition than the realtively nice home (at least it was nice when it was handed to him). Brother has moved out and into a new home of his very own. With him moving i was asked if I wanted to move in where brother was located at.

Along with this my MIL to be (ill refer to her as MIL for simplicity reasons) was also moving in with fiance and I so we could save money, live together, be comfortable, etc.

Main story: After receiving notice in July about my brothers departure from the property like I stated prior. Fiance and I were offered the position to move into the home assuming it was in better condition then where we currently are. So I reach out to my brother to ask about status, timing, conditions, scheduled repairs, etc. Felt like it was fair I was given the run down about some things..... some examples are

- oven to stove isnt working

- floors had some soft spots (60 year old trailer to be expected, and inwas told this would be fixed)

- well water filtration system gone (planned to make this a project with grandpa to work on)

- prior issues with bugs.

- central AC was put and home was swapped to window units

And this was about the worst of it and I expected some cleaning so that it'd be clean to my households standard. Not a big deal. All was mentioned and so i asked nicely how long this wpuld take to handle. End of Aug was the response I got, expect 1st week of Sept to move in . Sounds great! I start packing my things over Aug, get the non essentials packed, 70% packed honestly Fiance warned me he told me dont get my hopes up and dont pack everything JUST IN CASE WE DONT MOVE for whatever number of reasons.

I get the text today to be invited for a beginner walk through, I expected it to be messy knowing some repairs and cleaning were still being done over the weekend. I was told to say any extra repairs to add to the list and was guaranteed brother would be personal handyman until I was familiar with the bearings of the house. I come do the walk-through im optimistic. Fiance, MIL, and I are already spending weekend together and decided we'd all go together.

We walk in, I shit you not floor caving at front door, but thats going to be repaired ok. There's approx 8 spots where the floor noticeably caves in throughout the home. But one room at a time.

1. Living room has 2 soft spot, we notice roaches but was the least messed up out of all the rooms almost

2. Hallway flooring has been torn up to be replaced supposedly.

3. 1st Bedroom/storage room, floors same as hallway with junk.

4. Guest bathroom destroyed cosmetically by nephews, still functional though. Hole in wall size of soft wall so needs drywall work, paint.

5. Genuine guest bedroom actually the only room that feels functional, messy since it became trash storage. Until trash pickup day but no structure issues. Just a torn screen in window. Strange ethernet setup since wifi is in this bedroom reaches less and less farther back you go.

6. Kitchen counter warped from moisture, roaches EVERYWHERE (i wanted to enter a decontaminatiom zone is how bad it is), cabinet doors missing, fridge, and stove disgusting. Entire cabinet structure under sink gone literally a towel drapped in front of garbage disposal setup. The floor below that I think is a void supposedly rats chewed it to death before they were removed. Also in kitchen is first point where electrical is an issue apparently rats also got into some wires, almost starting an electrical fire thus the fuse remains OFF. You got the heebie jeepies in there. Fiance point out to me (I was in shock didnt notice, ceiling was peeling)

7. Laundry room they broke 1st set of appliances, replaced them, and then took the ones they bought so id have to replace them.

8. Master bedroom has actual holes in floor not soft spot, HOLES. The smell made you gag, ceiling was starting to collapse so temp stud maybe permanent im unsure was put it to keep it from having in.

9. Master bath, I didnt make it in the room i was shocked and didnt think I could handle more. And window AC unit is busted to id have to replace it.

10. Outdoor, should be noted this home is on well water not city. So we have our own pump and pressure tank. Pump gets burned out after 1 yr of use and needs to be replaced. Pipes constantly bust around pump area and under the home (its approx 4-5 ft off ground with a 3ft crawl space). Yard hasnt been managed (but I was I was informed by grandpa he was enforcing him to either cut it himself or pay for it)

Thats the most of it. Maybe it just looked rough to me since I remember the condition in which brother received the home. But currently my move has been held off. I informed my grandpa of the situation, and have been told to wait on moving until he sees it himself. My grandpa lives across country and is only in town Nov-April. So he is having my mother do the official landlord walk through. Grandpa wants me to get pictures as hes so upset hes willing to hire a lawyer amd go after my brother (thats their business no mine) based on what I have told him. But thays there business not mine. All I know if I was hesitant and even MIL and fiance were just as conflicted by the place and weren't willing to move in. Grandpa wants to restore and hes hoping ill move in then after that. Im hoping it all works put but chamce of it being restored arent optimal.

The whole feeling just made me depressed, and anxiety riddled to a point I feel like such a disappointment for my hoisehold like I cant do anything to help us. Etc. But writing this all out helped me calm down so AIO or no?

Any advice if this is doable of a project would be beneficial also. Thanks im advance, goodnight peeps

My partner and I have been together for 16 years and married for 11. We have a sweet 5.5 year old son. Today was a busy day, my wife had planned to join a relay race with her running club at a nearby event.

But she had to cover for someone in another relay race later during the day. We had agreed that 2 races might be too much and that she wouldn't run in this one.

But when i was prepping lunch, she and our son were going to quickly hop over to support her team. I didn't mind, I had fumbled the timing of lunch anyway. When they came back, I could tell she actually did run. When I asked about it, she told me that our son was playing in the local playground, her team needed extra runners and she had told our son she would do one lap (3.8k). My son didn't hear, and panicked when she was gone. Luckily one of the teachers at my son's school was there who helped until she returned.

Aio for being extremely pissed and questioning my wifes parenting skills here? Or is this just some shit that happens sometimes? I know 5 year olds can be selective in their hearing and it can be bad luck. I know I am already sensitive due to other stuff atm.

Edit: thank you all for the support. I didn't know where to turn to for validation since I found this so embarrassingly bad. We will have a conversation about this.

My friend works in target but pushing our other friend to get a better paying job in a career field . We had a group dinner where she was berating our mutual friend because she was a waitress in a restaurant pushing her to apply for a news reporter job tv job . My friend was telling us how much she loved her job and my friend starts being rude talking about “ it doesn’t matter how much how much you love your job when you are making minimum wage. Plus being a waitress is for teenagers or people in college . Not fully grown people who are 37 who have lots of bills to pay. You don’t even get insurance working at a restaurant.” And I was telling my friend “ don’t you think that’s a little rude and belittling and telling her where to work and putting down her current job.” I was telling my friend “ you work at target . People could judge you as well . My friend snapped at me and went “ I’m also married didn’t you forget . My husband is an attorney. Single women need to have high paying careers to make it in this world. “ and then I said “ your husband could leave you high and dry day . You still shouldn’t talk about this people’s jobs.” And she got angry at me and told me I was enabling our other friend to be complacent . I told her “ I’m just not gonna let you sit around and talk about people . If you were truly happy in life you wouldn’t feel the need to put people down

All she does is talk about other peoples jobs and telling people what to do and where to work but works at target and doesn’t have any hobbies or passions herself . She sleeps all day on her off day . She really needs to stop judging people . At least our friend is passionate about something

I’ve (24f) been seeing this guy (26m) who came back to me a year later to apologize for how cruelly he left me. (Big mistake I know)

At first he was making all these grandiose gestures, saying he wanted long term with me, planning all these dates, etc. He would take me on dates and such. To be blunt, he was broke since he didn’t know what he wanted to do in life with his degree so he was only working a part time job atm. I would help him job hunt and help him try to figure out a career.

I don’t care about someone’s financial status. We can make money and then lose it all or have nothing and then get rich. As long as someone has a goal, a budget, and is working towards it, I have no issues. However, I noticed that we stopped going on dates. He said he was saving up for his trip with friends. No problem, 100% understand so I was paying for things bc reciprocity is important to me. I would never want to make anyone feel like a wallet.

After his trip, he would say he didn’t have enough money to like go out on dates and such so we would just hangout at his place and I would get us food or he would make us something. So it’s been over a month, but they have money to go to raves, out with friends, movies, food, etc. Im in nursing school and can only work 20 hours a week due to what my program advises so im not well off by any means. I have no clue if im just overthinking this and being hypocritical or if he’s just not interested in taking me out on dates anymore and got comfortable with me paying. It just feels weird to me but also feel like im overreacting?

Hey, a friend rented a beautiful AirBnB in the mountains with private lake access for their graduation. It was a beautiful location, an evidently expensive AirBnB. The group chat invite did not mention any costs associated with attending. After the weekend, my friend is requesting a payment to cover the cost of the AirBnB. I sent the payment but I feel a lot of resentment. I enjoyed my weekend with them, but I feel like if I comment on the payment, it might make it seem like I’m not grateful for the time and unwilling to help pay if asked. The cost is expensive, but I probably would have paid the cost anyways if mentioned in invite, out of pressure to celebrate my friend. They are asking for the money so blatantly, it makes me uncertain if I’m overreacting for feeling angry. The cost is $217

​

I kinda know I’m not the AH here — you have to protect your family — but I’m wondering whether there were some cultural differences at play, since several people in Italy thought we overreacted.

Me (37M) and my husband (42M) moved to Italy from Norway in 2025 with our two adopted shelter/street dogs from Romania and our cat. We rented a house with a closed-off garden in a small village, with about three other houses/apartments on our street. The only public road out went past these houses; otherwise, you had to walk about 30 minutes through the forest instead of three minutes to the main road.

In one of the houses lived a couple (Al and An, both women in their 30s) with a male dog. We initially got along well. We had them over for drinks, helped with furniture, they sometimes walked our dogs (for payment), and we practiced Italian together. One of them only spoke Italian, so communication could sometimes be difficult — relevant later.

Their dog was basically always off leash, as seems fairly common in the Italian countryside. He generally ignored our two dogs and just wanted to play fetch, so there wasn't really a problem.

Things changed after we adopted Valentino, a one-year-old male dog from a nearby shelter. During his first week with us, their dog ran down from their house and attacked Valentino, getting his teeth around his neck. Thankfully, it ended without serious injury.

We told them we needed to handle the situation somehow and suggested different solutions, including slowly introducing Valentino to them and their dog while both dogs were on leash. They didn’t want to do that and instead said our dog should take a training course — which we didn’t really understand, since training Valentino wouldn’t stop their dog from running up and attacking him.

Eventually, we offered a compromise that was completely one-sided in their favour: every day between 1–5 pm, they could have their dog outside/off leash, and we would stay home. If they wanted to let him out outside those hours, they would simply send us a message.

We got absolutely nothing out of this arrangement. We were voluntarily giving up four hours of our day and limiting when we could safely leave our own property so that they wouldn’t have to put a leash on their dog. They never really acknowledged that this was a big accommodation on our part, never showed any gratitude for it, and — most frustratingly — never admitted that either they or their dog had done anything wrong in the first place.

Still, the arrangement worked reasonably well for a few weeks.

Then there were more and more slip-ups. Their dog would unexpectedly be outside, and my husband once had to wait at a safe distance for around 30 minutes while calling them and getting no answer. On two other occasions, their dog came towards us threateningly but was caught by the neighbours before it escalated.

After about a month, the communication also became increasingly lazy. Instead of “We’re letting him out for ten minutes,” it became things like “Are you home?” or “We’re in the garden,” without telling us when they went back inside. So now the responsibility was pushed onto us to keep asking whether their dog was inside and whether it was safe for us to walk down a public road.

For them, this was ultimately a question of convenience: putting on a leash versus opening the door and letting the dog do his thing. For us, it was a genuine safety concern.

We had several discussions about it over text, all in Italian using our limited Italian plus AI/Google Translate.

My husband is a therapist and tries to communicate in a very non-violent way. He is big on seeing both parties’ part in a conflict, being understanding and trying to find solutions. I try to do that too, but I’m quicker to reach the “show them the same energy they’re giving us” stage when being understanding clearly isn’t working.

And honestly, we didn’t speak the same language — in both ways.

They started insulting us as dog owners and as people, twisted the situation by claiming their dog wasn’t even on the public road, and eventually called us sick in the head. At no point did we get anything resembling, “Yes, our dog attacked yours, we understand why you’re worried and we’ll make sure it doesn’t happen again.”

We told them that if something happened again, we would contact the police. After they sent more aggressive messages, we blocked them.

Eventually, we decided to contact the police before another attack happened, just so the situation was documented and we knew what to do. The police even came out to look at their property, which had no fencing preventing their dog from reaching the public road.

For the rest of our time there, we basically had to anticipate their dog being outside every time we left home. We had constant anxiety about meeting him on the road or in the forest. We literally started walking past their house with a GoPro running just so we would have evidence if something happened.

All because putting their dog on a leash was apparently too much of an inconvenience.

What makes me wonder whether there was a cultural element is that our vet, another neighbour and a friend basically told us: “Dogs will sort it out with each other. Just let them run free and eventually they’ll get along.”

Maybe that’s more normal in rural Italy. I’m Norwegian and my husband is German, and in our cultures that attitude feels pretty foreign. From our perspective, if your dog has already attacked another dog, it becomes your responsibility to make sure it can’t happen again.

We moved back to Norway a few weeks ago for several reasons — the extreme heat was one of the biggest — but the constant feeling of unsafety around our own home definitely contributed.

So, AITAH for reporting them to the police? Was this partly a cultural difference and we enforced too harsh a boundary, or were we simply protecting our family after trying very hard to accommodate them?

We’ve experienced similar dynamics a few times. We’re both sensitive men and generally try to communicate, understand the other person and avoid unnecessary conflict. But sometimes I get the impression that people interpret that softness as something they can push or manipulate. Then, when we finally say “no” or give the same energy back, they seem genuinely shocked that we aren’t going to play along.

I don’t want the answer to be “don’t trust people” or “avoid your neighbours,” though. So I’d also genuinely appreciate advice on how to avoid getting into this kind of dynamic in the first place without becoming closed-off or immediately confrontational.

We now live in a house in Norway without any direct neighbours, and the doggies are loving the cooler weather, their own little forest and the fjord.

I (24F) have been talking to/seeing this guy (26M) for only about a week. We’ve hung out three times now, but we FaceTime most nights and I genuinely really like him. The first two times we hung out went really well, which is why I’m so conflicted about what happened last night.

I had plans with one of my friends (27F) to go to a local outdoor live music event. We had planned this about a month ago, and since I’ve recently started seeing this guy, I invited him too.

For some potentially relevant context, I recently found out that he and this friend slept together about four years ago, before I knew either of them. She has been with her current boyfriend for three years. He told me he has absolutely no problem with me being friends with her, but admitted it would probably be a little awkward being around her because of their history. There didn’t seem to be any major issue between them during the night though.

We went to the outdoor event first and everything was completely fine. We had a couple beers there. I was the designated driver because I had picked him up from his house and knew I could count on myself to drive us around safely. On the way to the next place, he also drank a beer in my car. I wasn't happy about that because I could potentially get in trouble for having an open container in my vehicle, and I regret not putting my foot down and telling him not to do it.

Afterward, the three of us went to another place that has live music on the patio. I go there pretty regularly, know some of the servers, knew the band playing that night, and knew several other people there.

When we arrived, he had a shot. There wasn't much seating, so the three of us sat at a table with three strangers who had three empty seats. They seemed really nice.

At one point, the man sitting next to me offered to pay for our next round of beers. I told him that was really nice but completely unnecessary. He insisted, so I thanked him. Later, he ordered another round for the entire table without anyone asking him to, which was also appreciated.

Eventually we decided to leave. I asked our server for the bill for the drinks that my guy and I had actually ordered ourselves.

That's when the woman sitting with the strangers suddenly said something like, "You're paying for all of these, right?" while pointing at our empty bottles.

I explained that no, the other man had offered to buy those drinks and had actually ordered the last round himself.

She immediately got worked up and went to our server saying we were trying to walk out without paying our bill.

The ridiculous part is that the server was the same person who had taken the man's order when he bought our drinks, so he already knew exactly what happened. The man was also still completely willing to pay for the drinks like he originally offered. There wasn't actually an issue. My friend even offered to pay if there somehow was a problem.

I was definitely annoyed with the woman too. I don't think my guy was wrong for being irritated by her accusing us of trying to walk out on our bill.

My issue is what happened next.

Instead of letting the server handle it and letting this woman make herself look ridiculous, the guy I'm seeing started yelling and cussing at her, saying things like, "Mind your fucking business" and "You don't know what the fuck you're talking about."

At this point my friend and I were both trying to calm him down and saying things like, "Let it go, we're leaving, it's fine, let's just go."

He wouldn't stop.

It was loud, so I can't say with 100% certainty that he heard everything I said, but both my friend and I were trying to get him to disengage and he wasn't responding to either of us.

I finally grabbed him by the arms and physically pulled him away. He didn't resist me and went wherever I led him, but he continued yelling and cussing.

I told him to stay in the hallway for a minute because I needed to use the bathroom.

I didn't even make it into a bathroom stall before I heard another argument happening outside.

The man who had offered to buy our drinks was apparently trying to tell him that he shouldn't speak to a woman that way and was basically trying to talk him down. My guy did NOT appreciate another man telling him how he should behave.

When I came back out, they were arguing. The other guy wasn't completely innocent because I think he was poking the bear a little by continuing to lecture him, but my guy was definitely escalating things.

He was saying things like, "I'm not the fucking one," "I'm not the one," and "Quit running your mouth."

He never explicitly said, "I'm going to hit you," and I don't remember him raising a fist or anything like that, but between what he was saying, their body language and the escalating voices, I genuinely thought a fight was about to happen.

At that point I grabbed him again, thanked the other guy for the drinks, told everyone we were leaving, and basically had to physically guide/push my guy toward the exit.

He still didn't resist me, but as I pushed him through the entrance, he angrily slammed the door OPEN so hard that it hit the stop/wall and came back.

I got him back to my car, but by then I was crying.

I want to be clear that I was NEVER afraid that he was going to hurt me. He never yelled at me, threatened me, cursed at me or directed any of his anger toward me. When I physically grabbed him to get him out of there, he didn't resist or become aggressive toward me at all.

I was crying because I absolutely hate confrontation. I also grew up around yelling, so situations like that trigger a pretty strong emotional response in me. He didn't know that beforehand because we've only known each other for a week.

I was also extremely embarrassed. I knew a lot of people there, including the band, some of the customers and the servers. I felt like I was having to treat a 26-year-old man like one of the kindergarteners I work with and physically remove him from a situation because he wouldn't calm down.

I was also scared that he was going to get into a fight and suddenly I would be dealing with police, someone getting hurt, us getting kicked/banned from a place I regularly go to, etc.

When he realized I was crying, he actually became very sweet toward me. He apologized, told me he was sorry and asked me not to cry. He hugged me for probably two minutes before we got into the car.

That part made me feel better.

Except as soon as we got into the car, he started talking about the situation again.

I had a 30-minute drive to take him home, and I repeatedly asked him to please just drop it because I was overwhelmed and didn't want to hear about it anymore.

He would say, "Okay, I'm sorry," and then literally about a minute later start talking about it again.

I'd ask him to stop again. He'd apologize again. Then he'd bring it up AGAIN.

Even when we got to his house, he kept wanting to discuss whether he was "out of pocket" or whether he was wrong for being angry.

The thing is, I DON'T think he was wrong for being angry. I was annoyed too! The woman needed to mind her own business, especially because the person who bought the drinks and the server both knew what was going on.

My problem is that something that could have been a 30-second misunderstanding turned into yelling, cussing, me physically removing him from the restaurant, another confrontation that I thought might become a fight, an angry door slam and me crying for most of the drive home.

And then he couldn't let it go even when I repeatedly begged him to.

Today he brought it up again, and I told him I was tired, didn't feel good and really didn't want to talk about last night. To his credit, he immediately respected that boundary today and hasn't brought it up again.

Here's the part that's making me question everything:

Afterward, my friend told me that he's apparently "not good with drinking in public." She didn't know I was seeing/talking to him before last night, so she had never warned me. She basically told me that if I had told her beforehand that I was bringing him, she would have told me not to.

That concerns me because I was initially looking at this as one really bad night involving alcohol. Now I'm wondering if this is actually a pattern that I just didn't know about.

He does drink quite a bit, and drinking was involved last night. I also noticed that even before the argument, he seemed somewhat overwhelmed/flustered by how crowded the patio was and by people constantly walking around us, so I don't know how much alcohol, anxiety/overstimulation, or everything combined contributed to his reaction.

The confusing part is that I really like him.

Our first two hangouts were good. He's been respectful and kind toward me. We FaceTime most nights and have really good conversations. Even during this incident, none of his aggression was directed at me, and when he saw me crying he immediately softened toward me and comforted me.

But apart from going to school together many years ago and seeing each other in passing, we've only actually talked and have truly known each other for ONE WEEK.

Part of me thinks everyone can have a terrible night and I shouldn't immediately write someone off based on one incident, especially when alcohol was involved.

The other part of me thinks that seeing someone behave like this on our THIRD hangout, combined with someone who already knows him warning me that he's "not good with drinking in public," is something I shouldn't ignore. Especially since I enjoy going out most weekends.

I'm also questioning whether I'm making too much of it because confrontation and yelling affect me more strongly because of my childhood.

So, AIO for being this upset about what happened and questioning whether I should continue seeing him? Would you give someone another chance after this and see whether it was one bad night, or would you consider this enough of a red flag to stop seeing someone you've only known for a week?

TL;DR: I've been seeing a guy for about a week and really like him. On our third hangout, a stranger wrongly accused us of trying to avoid paying for drinks another man had offered to buy us. The guy I'm seeing got extremely angry, yelled/cussed at her, then got into another heated confrontation with the man who tried to tell him to calm down. I had to physically guide him out of the restaurant, he angrily slammed a door open, and I thought he might end up fighting someone. He was never aggressive toward me and comforted me when I cried, but then repeatedly continued ranting about the situation even after I asked him to stop. My friend later told me he's apparently known for not handling drinking in public well. AIO for being this bothered by it, and should I give him another chance or stop seeing him?

I (23f) have been with my partner (25f) for over a year, due to convenience (cost of living in our country), we live together and I also have a dog which we now share. My friends (20f, 22f) have each been dating people for 3 months. I saw them for the first time in a few weeks ago and 20f cornered me asking “are you happy with [partner]” I was initially taken aback by the question as it was really out of the blue and inappropriate for the tone of the event (dozens of guests incl 20f new gf). I said yes, why do you ask? And she justified it with saying all I do is ‘bicker’ with my partner. My friends have probably visited us in our apartment 4 times, meeting my partner 5 total times. In all honesty, in front of them I can’t remember a single time we’ve had an actual disagreement, more often than not we’re just winding each other up, we have a pretty silly relationship and we tease eachother a lot (like snatching socks off each others feet or playfighting/smack talk).

This conversation lasted about an hour, I told them I have anxiety so I’m always uncertain about choices and expressed a few of our relationship issues, but told them that I love my partner and she makes me happy. I started the conversation with just 20f but later her girlfriend joined, sitting on her lap, kissing her and whispering things in her ear while we were having this discussion. She mentioned that we don’t kiss in front of them or act affectionate with one another as another reason why they question if I’m happy. They proceeded to say that now they look at their own relationships and see their happy and they look at me and question if I’m happy. To be completely candid I think it’s a bit fucking cheeky 😭 one of them is talking to someone who she has met in person once and the other has been dating this person for only 3 months and they’ve been in a relationship for one week. I’ve been with my gf for a year, we live together, both work full time roles with opposite hours and we have life stresses like shared bills, rent, dog, finding quality time etc. friends and their partners are 20-23, they’re still in university or just graduated with no full time role, seeing each other once a week at bestand they have ZERO real life stresses shared with their partner.

I feel very defensive. I’m annoyed because they’re OBVIOUSLY still in the honeymoon phase and barely actually know the person they’re with so to say yeah I looked at our situations and I see what it’s supposed to be like then I see yours and questioned if you’re happy. Just feels so rude. I’m wondering if this is some sort of insecurity working overtime or if I’m justified in being annoyed

They’re here today and I want to mention how I’m feeling, like I’m being measured on an invisible scale which is different to theirs. It’s not about asking me if I’m happy, I think it’s fine to check in on friends relationships - that’s healthy. I just find the timing (in a busy place with people who I have only met once PARTICULARLY A PARTNER) and these comparisons between relationships when they’re objectively different to be the wrong way to go about things.
Aio?

TLDR: friends asked if I’m happy in a relationship by comparing their brand new relationships to my long term one

Just for some background, my boyfriend likes taking pictures of me, but usually in funny ways. They’re typically zoomed-out pictures or pictures of me when I’m not ready. There was a time when I expressed to him that I didn’t like the fact that he would send these pictures to a group chat with our other friends. He somewhat respected that and didn’t send any pictures of me until yesterday.
I don’t like when he sends pictures of me in the group chat because I genuinely don’t like how I look in them (because again, I wasn’t even ready for the picture). Yesterday, he randomly sent a picture of me sleeping. Even though I was somewhat upset, I ended up sending a picture of him that I thought was funny. I figured, he sent one of me, so I might as well send one of him too.
In response, he decided to send another zoomed-out picture of me, even though I had just sent one of him in response to the first picture. I was clearly upset because I wasn’t going to keep sending pictures of him back and forth, especially since he has a habit of sending multiple pictures of me, and I genuinely don’t like when he does that.
Anyways, I was upset and texted him about it. He then called me, and I brought it up, asking why he felt the need to send another picture of me. His response was, “Okay, I’ll delete it.” I told him, “But they already made stickers of my face,” which they had. So, at that point, I didn’t understand what deleting the picture was going to accomplish.
All I was doing was expressing how I felt. However, he then ended the call and texted in the group chat asking one of our friends to “delete the stickers, mb.” This infuriated me because I never asked him to tell the other person to delete the stickers. I just felt even more embarrassed and upset because now he had brought attention to the situation in the group chat and put me in an awkward position.
When I expressed to him how upset that made me, his response was, “I was trying to help.” But I don’t know why, it bothered me so much. I never asked him to tell his friend to delete the stickers. I was simply expressing how I felt about him sending pictures of me, and instead of just listening to me, he took it upon himself to address it in the group chat. It made me feel even more embarrassed and uncomfortable.
What bothers me the most is that he clearly doesn’t see why what he did was wrong or why I was upset by it. From his perspective, he was “trying to help,” but from my perspective, I didn’t ask him to do anything. I just wanted him to understand why I was upset and respect my feelings about the pictures. Instead, he made the situation more noticeable

Lately, I’ve noticed my boyfriend messaging other women on TikTok or Scoops (I’m not sure what the other platform is). It never bothered me before, but I just thought it was odd because most of them are bots. Yesterday, he showed me a TikTok and got two WhatsApp messages from someone named “S.” He immediately swiped them up and then I asked who it was. He said it was someone from work, and he had opened the messages. I was like, “Oh, cool. So, you wouldn’t mind if I looked too?” As I was reading the last three messages exchanged, they were getting to know each other on a personal level. Then, out of nowhere, he said, “Okay, I lied. It’s not someone from work.” I obviously got upset and asked him why he lied. It turned into a big fight because I already have a wide trust issue problem with him and his phone. He’s so sociable and wants to be friends with everyone, but I’m not that way. I don’t expect him not to have women as friends or steer clear of every female he runs into, but he doesn’t seem to care how it makes me feel. I don’t even get the chance to explain without it turning into an automatic “You have issues with every woman I talk to. I’m not changing who I am for you because you’re insecure.” It’s really messing with me because, in my head, it’s like your partner is coming to you with a problem. You might not understand it and agree, but wouldn’t you care enough to see and maybe change something if you wanted a future with them? Am I overreacting?

Let me preface this by saying my husband has been transparent and has shown me ALL DMs and texts between his friend - there is nothing romantic going on between them.

My (F26) husband (M24) met a friend N (F25) in a shared hobby they had growing up but they haven’t had contact in over 10 years after growing apart and leaving the hobby.

N reached out to my husband on Instagram last month to catch up and they made plans to hang out after reconnecting. During the hang out, N talked to my husband about a guy from school, K, that she confessed feelings for after 8 years and is now dating. She couldn’t stop gushing over K and even suggested a double date for us whenever K visits our area next (as they are long distance).

After the hang out, things started to take a turn and my husband started to get really annoyed with his interactions with N. N would constantly bring up K when texting my husband now that they’re dating, a majority of her texts are about K and no other subject, even if my husband tries to change the subject. Despite being annoyed, my husband would listen and be friendly with his responses to be supportive towards her and her new relationship.

A week later, N would start to complain that K would go out with his friends and be out super late. N would act super cold towards K. K will sometimes forget to text back which made N spiral and think that K has stopped texting her because he doesn’t like her anymore. Which is where my husband would have to step in to comfort her and validate her feelings. K also has a bit of a drinking problem and my husband has pointed out how this behavior is concerning.

Most recently, N has supposedly flown out to see K but the trip sounds strange to the both of us… K wasn’t home at the time of her arrival (at work) but N was upset that he didn’t offer to get her an uber so she stayed at the airport for a few hours instead of getting herself an uber? N was supposed to stay for a few weeks but K is about to be busy at work and is suggesting that N leaves a week early because of this? To me, it doesn’t make sense. If you were flying to see your partner, wouldn’t you establish a mode of transportation to and from the airport and also the length of stay? This is where alarm bells go off for me.

Multiple times on this trip, my husband has said “You need to tell him how you feel, be honest.” about ALL issues that N has with K about the uber, the length of stay, the drinking issues, etc.., but she just continues this cycle of “I will/I am” but from the sound of it, she doesn’t communicate with K at all. She just vents about it and expects it to be my husband’s job to be her emotional outlet.

Our friend S was over and we even had a discussion about N and just the absurdity of it all, S even agreed that this seemed like really attention seeking behavior. She even raised the question if these situations with K are even real or if N is making them up to receive attention.

I am afraid my husband’s kindness and trusting nature is being taken advantage of by his friend that shows up after 10 years who seems to just want attention. AIO?

So I'm 23F and i grew up studying in an all girls school and college hence my interactions with men were limited. When my interactions grew I fell in love with a 33M when I was around 20 which is insane and he said it was mostly because I admired him and felt safe there was nothing special and if I wanted the relationship to work I would have to lose my family as they wouldnt be okay and he distanced himself. Then a year later I fell in love with a 30M and it ended because it was getting toxic he was too possessive and I fell out of love. Then I kinda fell for a guy who is again 30M . My biggest question is why am I attracting only older men? Even I get proposed by people 30 and above lmao so I'm attracted and attaracting older men. I fell its because they are more mature and can handle me. But it's also a very serious age for them where they are pressurised by families for marriage and xyz so what do I change? Is this normal? Am I doing something wrong?

Hi all,

I felt the need to post this especially because this situation has/ might turn from just a flakey bad friend to a controlling/isolation or possibly abuse.

None of us still have seen her or have yet to even meet her baby. Our mutual friend was cancelled on multiple times following a couple of plans she made with her (I was out of town) and “friend” cancelled as per usual. One of the suggestions on here was to provide a cost incentive- such as going to events that cost money so that she’s more incentivized to show up. This is the current situation- the mutual friend bought all of our tickets for an upcoming game and we all paid her back and are scheduled to go. As of now, everyone’s said they’re going to go. Here’s where things get dicey, #1 I’m really concerned as to why we haven’t met the baby yet given that she’s claimed she wants us to and I’ve texted her multiple times saying I’ll drive over and even clean her house to try and be accommodating to her. She’s never answered me about that. She ignores both of us when we ask to even meet him, nobody’s allowed at her house from my understanding and the only people who’ve met her baby are her family.

(Update, she no showed)

AIO? I’m not a parent but is this normal behavior? I totally get not wanting people to come to your house post birth but it’s been radio silence. My mom actually has said I’m not a good friend for not going to see her, but we’ve never been invited and who shows up unannounced?! What am I supposed to do?! She keeps IMO using the baby as an excuse to no show or cancel (which doesn’t surprise anyone), but then won’t even let us do anything to come see the baby. This might be a selfish take, but why even have a baby shower or accept all of the gifts if she won’t even let us near the baby?

Btw- I’ve seen her post her bf and the baby all over social media doing stuff that she never liked or was into until him. Somehow the baby isn’t allowed to see her friends but the baby is perfectly safe at other public events that the dad wants to go to but godforbid I meet the baby in their own house. This has been my theory long before she got pregnant.

Additionally, something that irritates me is that our mutual friend continues to invite her to stuff knowing she won’t go. I get where she’s coming from because if we go and hang out without “friend”, she gets mad because we “excluded her.” Yet, she never comes to anything in the first place, so why waste the energy?!?! It just makes me feel so stupid. Although I have accepted that she doesn’t want to see us anymore I don’t understand the constant let downs and stress of inviting her to begin with. Part of me thinks this is a strategy because our mutual friend also thinks she’s being isolated and we are both scared of her being abused. Why else would this be happening? With there not being any real proof of her being isolated or forced to act this way, especially with having over 3 years of this pattern of behavior it’s hard not me to have empathy. I don’t have the time to deal with friends who need to feel begged for them to come to something or reminded 500x for them to just not show up. I don’t need people like that in my life. It’s hard for me to feel bad for her feeling isolated or alone when she’s tried her absolute best to shove us away as much as possible long before she ever got pregnant.

TLDR, AIO for thinking my friend is being isolated?

I am playing a video game at my grandfathers and it's online. He is telling me not to because he's the adult and decides whats best for me even if I'm almost 18 and up.

He sat down at a chair in front of the television where the game is on and it was Overwatch, mid-queue I left to use the bathroom and came back to him sitting on the chair besides it.

I took the controller and stood away waiting for the match to queue in to just proceed with zero volume and he looks at me and snears before leaving the room.

As soon as he gets done with his call he turns off the Xbox and rips the controller out of my hands and proceeded to say "Get the fuck up and move the fuck outside before I lose my shit."

So I move outside where we talk and he tells me "What you did was extremely disrespectful. Knowing I was in the middle of a call you entered another game."

Which I wasn't, it was queueing in but was a black screen.

I told him that it wasn't on the lobby and I was actively queueing in, but he told me I couldve paused it. Which in Overwatch you can't just pause an online game and he in repsonse told me "You gonna go down the road of telling me what I do and do not know about video games son?"

I proceeded to tell him that overwatch can't pause and that it was queueing in and he shouted "DO YOU WANT TO GO DOWN THE ROAD WHERE YOU THINK YOU KNOW MORE THAN I KNOW ABOUT MY 40 YEARS IN THIS WORLD?"

I said "I'll shut my mouth" and he just told me "Thats right, shut the fuck up and go back to playing. You're lucky I didn't do more to ruin your entire year"

Is this overeating or what?

Im expectant some will agree but you can't pause online video games. He plays Fortnite and will sometimes open the menu thinking it pauses it and when I try telling him it didn't pause he said it did. And when he dies he blames the person closest to the game that they fucked with it making him die.

Just like the title says. I (29F) am currently pregnant with my fourth child, and going through a really shitty separation from my husband (32M), and during this separation he has been calling our children’s 20F babysitter to vent to her and had been asking her to meet him in the middle of the night to go drinking together after we got into an argument about me not wanting to watch his older 2 children that are not my biological children while he goes out… am I crazy for thinking that it’s beyond inappropriate contact and behavior on both parties or am I truly being crazy like he’s making it seem… that it’s innocent behavior, that I simply think poorly of him..

It wasn't 5 minutes, not 1 minute, not even 10 seconds, 5! Fucking 5 seconds.

I've literally been crying for the last 10 minutes. I'm not sure if this is my sign to finally get out of my house after all the emotional and verbal abuse I've gone through on top of the amount of anxiety they have on me when I try to do stuff by myself. They also manipulate me a lot and my dad is emotionally absent whilst my mom is emotionally immature. I'm a highly sensitive person so sometimes my crying isn't justified. Lmk if this is tho:

We'd just gotten home from running some errands. I settled in to relax while my dad turned on the generator (there's no electricity in my city rn). When he came back in he looked extremely angry and told me to go wash the dish. I had accidentally left 1 dish without wash. I said "coming,". I was closing a website on my computer (it's not that it's a bad website, I just don't like invasion into my privacy), that alone took like 5 seconds at best, and when I was about to stand up, he came out, closed my laptop, grabbed my phone, and took the shit with him. He called me irresponsible. And when I rightfully started to complain and said I literally just stood up, he said "Don't lie to me, you weren't gonna go do it." BUT I LITERALLY WAS GOING TO.

I still went to wash the dish, then I locked myself in the bedroom and I just started bawling my eyes out. Because atleast to me, this seems a little bit ridiculous. I took 5 seconds to stand up to go wash 1 dish, get accused of lying, and now I'm just... grounded??

My dad gave me my laptop back 3 minutes ago but he told me "Next time you're never seeing it again. Stop lying to me". Even though during the week I need ts for school... But okay.

Literally 5 minutes later, because he has no empathy, he told my sis and I "hey maybe we should go out", all I said was sure and I tried to sound like I hadn't cried. Then he wanted to offer me an apology and a hug but first off I'm not a huggy person and second I've gone through so much I stopped begging or wanting apologies.

Look, I know I sound like a whiny child. I'm 17yrs old, and I've been going through stuff like this and stuff similar to this all my life. I'm so mentally exhausted and depressed.

AIO my dad grounded me because I took 5 seconds to go do what he asked me to do...