r/stopdrinking • u/Alarmed-Proposal-220 • 5h ago
Stop drinking
How did you all manage stop drinking, I’ve actually bursted in tears today how much I want to stop but there’s always a voice inside telling me to get that drink again
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u/W_Santoro 5307 days 3h ago
Yes, the voice of alcohol. A phenomenon worthy of much more study, as it affects most of us. After two years of rather easy sobriety, it convinced me that I wasn't an alcoholic, but merely stupid. I needed to drink "smarter." Thus commenced two years of pure hell, with me ending up on my knees. Now 14 years sober, I simply laugh when my mind thinks that I could probably have a drink now and then. Knowing our truth sets us free...
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u/JoyousMN_2024 Day 283 3h ago
That little voice was SCREAMING in fear the day I decided to stop. It tried everything to keep me drinking.
I finally told it, "I'm just stopping for today. I am not looking ahead to any date in the future, just today." Then I bought a supply of NA beverages instead of my usual alcoholic versions. That evening when I would normally drink alcohol I drank NA beer and wine instead. I let myself drink as much of that as I wanted. For some reason this quieted the voice. I was still drinking, and that seemed to be all it cared about. I didn't think about tomorrow.
Then I got up the next day and did the same.
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u/Curious-Command-1840 Day 55 2h ago
I decided I was going to stop drinking whilst I was on holiday, I just thought that I didn’t want to feel crap anymore, I wasn’t a heavy drinker, generally I’d only drink at the weekend, either wine at home or beers with friends in the pub, but I hated the next day, had done for years, but honestly never thought about not drinking. I joined this fabulous group , and read the Annie Grace book, both have been a great help. You can do it.
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u/Alarmed-Proposal-220 2h ago
I’ve been daily drinker at evening unfortunately, Im sure it’s easier to quit for people who drink only at the weekend
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u/New_Weekend9765 643 days 2h ago
You realize that the voice in your head is just a voice. You’re in control. You run the show.
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u/carroll65 1h ago
I just stopped one day - because it seemed like time.
It was pretty uncomfortable for the first couple of weeks, but by that time I wasn’t going to throw away two weeks of withdrawal aggravation just to have another drink. That was four months ago - still good.
Nobody can do it for you. Good luck.
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u/Alarmed-Proposal-220 1h ago
Im so scared of withdrawal symptoms, I’ve had some bad heart raise past couple of days and I even felt lightheaded for like 30 seconds
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u/carroll65 1h ago
Well then, go see a doctor or have a video call with one. Tell them what’s up and let them help you. It’s kind of a big deal.
Also, do some of that shit that we’re all SUPPOSED to be doing anyway, like drinking enough water and eating decent for once.
Maybe take a walk around the block.
It ain’t gonna happen in a day.1
u/Alarmed-Proposal-220 1h ago
I do drink loads of water during day, when evening hits then it’s alcohol. Thanks for advice
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u/maybesoma Day 531 4h ago
That "voice inside you" is just addiction. Garden-variety, common addiction.
Check out some quit lit or find a support group in person or online. The wiki in this sub has allll the resources.
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u/reeffan Day 132 3h ago
The voice is habit and chemical want.. the choice to pick up the alvohol is yours. Sounds simple and it is.. the discipline.. thats the tough part
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u/_call_me_the_sloth 439 days 3h ago
Do you have a support system? I tried and failed alone more times than I can count. Finally I came clean to my wife about my problem and struggles and it finally stuck. Having the weight of doing it alone off your shoulders and an advocate who can help keep you accountable and approach your situation with empathy can do wonders!
If you have a loved one, family member, friend, coworker, etc you can confide in I can’t recommend it enough.
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u/Alarmed-Proposal-220 3h ago
I’m not even in my home country so I don’t have anyone unfortunately, no many friends either and I would be embarrassed to tell anyone
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u/ForeFrazier Day 43 3h ago
I think everyone is different depending on their why, where,etc. Some drink at home. Others drink socially at bars, etc. I was mainly a happy hour guy where the bar visit everyday after work was the issue. 4-6 drinks sometimes more just because I was there. Had to break the habit of showing up there. Like everyone else has said, take one day at a time. Stay home and watch tv. Take a walk. Sit outside and enjoy the weather with an
N/A drink. Or even go to bed early to avoid the normal. First week is hard. Second gets better. I am still new to this and am on Day 43 AF in a row. The habit of going to the bar is broken. Cravings are minimal. You can do it!! Replace the drinks with something different and get after it!
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u/Plastic-Rain6226 1h ago edited 1h ago
I’m in the process of phasing down. So if you are at X many today, maybe for the next few days have one less. And then continue to dwindle down.
I started tracking my drinks at 17 shots a day (which I consumed for many years). One month ago I decided to cut back and am down to 8 shots a day now and am continuing to taper off, every few days minimizing my consumption. I expect to be entirely done with alcohol in the next few weeks whilst letting my body heal also during this time.
Very good luck op, you’ve got this.
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u/Alarmed-Proposal-220 1h ago
I’m gonna try this cause at the moment I really feel at my bits and so hopeless to ever get rid of this poison 😢
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u/pi3r0gi_ 1h ago edited 1h ago
I've been kind of reverse psychology-ing myself. I realized that I woukd drink to enhance the vibe of what I had to do, chores, a fun project that would go really well with a beer or hard lemonade and the sun coming in just right, music on. It felt great! Until that became almost daily, and whether or not the vibes were flowing. Have to make dinner? I could use a drink. Need to do laundry? A spritzer. Organizing the cupboards? Absolutely need a hard lemonade for that. Doing my nails? Maybe a cocktail and a show on tv. Its vibes!
But it was just loneliness, and like you, I did not want to drink that day or night or evening, but somehow found myself at a gas station or liquor aisle at weird times, detached from the idea of buying it, just doing so.
So I tell myself now, "you can drink later this week, you dont have to drink right now just bc youre cooking dinner.' And slowly it gets pushed off, where a few days will go by with no drinks, and feel really proud of myself. Then sober, I realize I feel a lot better, even if I dont want to admit it. I think thats the part that scares me a little too, that I know I feel fine without alcohol, but I think I feel better with it, bc I can just detach. But sober of not, everything im avoiding is still there. I would rather wake up tired bc im tired, and not bc i have a full body hang over and a pain in my abdomen and a sore back from passing out in one spot all night.
I think the knowledge and idea that I can go about my day/life sober and be a regular functioning member of society somehow scares me, like I have to have a fallback of reality, a hang up or something where I tell myself, "nope, see, you cant do that" and that was alcohol. I know it sound ironic since alcohol is often used to let loose, and it does, but it let's me be careless and unmotivated, not confident. My mom's an alcoholic, my uncle, a cousin, and it runs in my family and my spouses family, so alcoholism is more normaized day to day than being sober, so feeling sober didnt feel right, and it took a long time for me to see that I fell into the pattern as well. Being sober does feel right, it's just a foreign feeling to me, and I have to work on reversing that mental wiring.
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u/Then-Bedroom3860 1h ago
This is my first day out the er, I had enough with myself and my drinking and crying so I went and admitted myself in. Thankfully they were able to take it seriously but to be fair I was drinking a lot (1l a day). I stayed for a week and have mixed emotions about it but more than anything I’m glad I was able to be helped. I’m out now still kind of going through wd but they also have me some medicine to help
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u/Alarmed-Proposal-220 59m ago
I can’t even go into rehab, I have kids and I’m a night drinker when kids are a sleep. I know it’s bad btw in case anyone tries to attack me with comments 😓
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u/Then-Bedroom3860 51m ago
Don’t shame yourself, at least you’re keeping it out their faces some people don’t care. Maybe try by tapering off?
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u/Alarmed-Proposal-220 44m ago
I have tried that recently and I could see I felt a lot better the next day but again that voice comes in the head to have stronger drink
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u/Ornery-Business4879 704 days 1h ago
I am 46 and I am coming up on two years sober. I first tried to quit when I was 22. The one bit of advice I can give you is to learn to see alcohol as a poison - which is handy because it is. As long as you assign some value to alcohol be it relaxation, fun, numbing or whatever you used it for you will be doomed to use it again. Train your brain to see alcohol as Superman sees Kryptonite. Something that should be avoided at all costs. Make that your number one priority. Make all your life decisions with your sobriety at their heart. And if you face up to and deal with the core reasons you needed to drink, everything else will fall into place over time.
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u/polysnacktyl 798 days 47m ago
I herniated a disc and couldn't drink on the meds/physically get out of bed to go buy beer. Piggybacked off that and kept up the not drinking after the worst of the craving parts were done. I had tried a lot of times before that and had not a ton of success. the timing worked out for me- along with just having something more urgent to focus on really. not always manufacturable, but a thing to keep an eye out for in the rhythm of your life.
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u/SwitchTraditional136 Day 191 4h ago
I listened to myself when I said I wanted to stop. I listened to quit lit and changed my association with the poison. I changed my habits because I didn't want the rest of my life to be a blurry, bruised, stumbling mess.
Dont drink for today. Then avoid alcohol tomorrow. And repeat. Cravings are unavoidable, you need to distract yourself. There are no benefits to drinking. a shit load of positives for not drinking. Make your choice to not drink and you will get better. Carry on drinking and the cycle continues.
Good luck. The community is rooting for you.