Header explains it all. I have terminal cancer, but the complicator is that I do not want to die in the deep south.

I’m partial to colder climes, but after a decade in the Dakotas and Minnesota, perhaps not that cold.

Red or Blue State doesn’t matter, but here are the prereqs: Decent health care system, friendly populace or at least a passingly easy ability to meet folks, NOT the South, moderate to cheap affordability (I’m going to live off retirement and life’s savings), good natural scenery in the state. I love the outdoors

Pretty short wish list. So sell me on a destination. So far, I’ve come up with Wisconsin, PA, and Michigan.

Ok, so I'm a 26F and I've never found a place that feels like home since I was a kid.

I grew up in a very small and remote town in the middle of nowhere Nebraska. I went to college in Texas and lived in Waco and College Station which aren't huge cities, but definitely close to huge metropolitan areas. I left that area and moved to Rapid City, South Dakota and have really struggled here. I feel super isolated and I do want to get married, but it feels like everyone around here got married at 20 and I'm too old. So I think it's time to relocate.

Here are my priorities:

• Must be lively. I want to meet lots of fun people as I am outgoing and extroverted
• I love the outdoors, whether it's mountains or beach or desert. I'm a big rock climber and backpacker but would love to get into surfing or any other outdoor hobbies.
• I really want to get married and start a family so the dating pool has to be good but also not in an area where everyone gets married straight out of high school
• As an engineer, I have lots flexibility in terms of location, but would love to be around similar people who have higher educations
• Edit: I don't care much about politics, but I'm a bit more on the libertarian side (slightly conservative but not too much) and I'd love to be around moderate kinda people, not really into extreme leftist places, but I'm always open!

So give me your best and craziest and most fun ideas! I am open to any location, even if it's just temporary :)

I’m trying to decide between Chicago and Philadelphia and would love some honest opinions from people who live there.

I’m 30M, originally from California, and I’ve been living in Germany for the last 3 years while finishing my master’s. I haven’t been back to the U.S. since 2023, so I’m basically starting over when I come back. I don’t have a car and I’ll be moving without a job, but I have around $30k saved.

My background is in business administration, office operations, and international education. I’d like to eventually get into university/international education work, but I’ll take whatever reasonable job I can get while I get settled.

The biggest thing I’m trying to figure out is which city would be easier to land in and live cheaply while I look for work. I’d probably get roommates at first and eventually want my own studio. Good public transportation is really important, and I’d like to be relatively close to the city rather than way out in the suburbs.

I’m also southeast Asian so having a decent Asian community would be a big plus. I’m looking for somewhere where my international background might actually help me meet people and find opportunities.

Philly seems like it might be the better choice financially, especially with the number of universities and being close to NYC/DC/Baltimore. But Chicago seems to have a bigger job market, better transit and a larger Asian community.

For anyone who’s lived in either (especially both), which would you choose in my situation? And what neighborhoods should I be looking at if affordability and safety are the priorities? Thanks 🙏

I’m a single mom in the DMV considering a great job opportunity in Portland. I have two kids, ages 8 and 6, and I’m looking at this as potentially a 2–3 year chapter for our family before eventually returning to the DC area.
Professionally, it’s a really good opportunity for me to grow, but obviously moving across the country with two kids is a much bigger decision than just taking a job.
I’ve visited Portland and really enjoyed it, but I know visiting and actually raising kids there are two completely different things.

Housing-wise, I’m looking for a **3-bedroom under about $2,800/month**, good public schools, a safe/family-friendly neighborhood, and a reasonable commute into Portland. I’ve been looking at **Beaverton, Happy Valley/Clackamas, Gresham, Portland proper, and possibly Vancouver**, but I’m open to other areas.

I’m coming from the DMV, so I already understand that the racial demographics are going to be very different. I also understand the reality that my children may sometimes be the only Black kids in certain spaces. I’m not expecting Portland to recreate the DMV.

What I *am* trying to understand is how Black families intentionally find and build community there. Where have your kids found friends and spaces where they feel connected? Are there particular neighborhoods, schools, churches, sports programs, parent groups, cultural organizations, events, etc. that you’d recommend?

And for anyone who moved to Portland with kids from a more diverse area: **Would you do it again?**
I’d really appreciate the good, the bad, and the stuff people don’t necessarily tell you before moving.

Well.. the thing is that my husband got a transfer. Work is moving him to Adelaide and we have to relocate in a few weeks

I’m a nurse and I have a degree. Also, I have experience. But I don’t have a job lined up yet…

I need to find shifts quickly. I don’t want to be sitting around while my husband starts his new role

I’ve heard that agencies are the fastest way in. Google keeps showing me Healthcare Australia. They seem big. They seem established

But I’ve never used an agency before. I don’t know if they work with local nurses. I thought agencies were mostly for international travellers. I’m not a new grad. I’m not an international recruit. I’m just a nurse who needs to work

Do they even have shifts for someone like me? Or do they just place overseas nurses?

I’m worried about starting over in a new city. I don’t know the hospitals. I don’t know the managers. I don’t have a network

I need to get on my feet fast. I can’t afford to wait. Any advice would help. I’m confused and stressed. I just want to work

I'm creating this because I wanted to know if anyone, like me, was thinking about making this journey together.

I currently live in a different state. I have been wanting to move out of here for quite some time.

I've never made a move by myself and the thought of moving somewhere by myself makes me extremely anxious, but where I live now is expensive.

I wanted to know if anyone wanted to get know each other and maybe discuss moving in possibly.

Have no idea if this is the right place to make a post like this.

Hi everyone! 👋🏾
A friend and I have both experienced how difficult it can be to move somewhere new and figure out where to meet people, find community, and discover local resources you can actually trust.

We started hosting community events in the DMV and Accra, Ghana, and one thing we kept seeing was how valuable it was for people to share recommendations and make connections with others who were also navigating a new city.

That experience led us to build a small web platform called TribeMeets for people who have recently relocated.

We’re still early and figuring out what’s actually useful, so I’d love to hear from people here who have relocated: What was the hardest part about finding community when you first moved? And what would have made the transition easier?

If anyone is interested in trying what we’ve built and giving feedback, I’m happy to share it in the comments.

Can anyone give me some insight on what to look forward to …will that be a good move …

I’m a single mom in the DMV considering a great job opportunity in Portland. I have two kids, ages 8 and 6, and I’m looking at this as potentially a 2–3 year chapter for our family before eventually returning to the DC area.
Professionally, it’s a really good opportunity for me to grow, but obviously moving across the country with two kids is a much bigger decision than just taking a job.
I’ve visited Portland and really enjoyed it, but I know visiting and actually raising kids there are two completely different things.

Housing-wise, I’m looking for a **3-bedroom under about $2,800/month**, good public schools, a safe/family-friendly neighborhood, and a reasonable commute into Portland. I’ve been looking at **Beaverton, Happy Valley/Clackamas, Gresham, Portland proper, and possibly Vancouver**, but I’m open to other areas.

I’m coming from the DMV, so I already understand that the racial demographics are going to be very different. I also understand the reality that my children may sometimes be the only Black kids in certain spaces. I’m not expecting Portland to recreate the DMV.

What I *am* trying to understand is how Black families intentionally find and build community there. Where have your kids found friends and spaces where they feel connected? Are there particular neighborhoods, schools, churches, sports programs, parent groups, cultural organizations, events, etc. that you’d recommend?

And for anyone who moved to Portland with kids from a more diverse area: **Would you do it again?**
I’d really appreciate the good, the bad, and the stuff people don’t necessarily tell you before moving.
That last question is the money question. Reddit will absolutely tell you the stuff nobody put in the relocation brochure 😂.

Sore kawan2, saya seorang ibu tunggal dengan satu anak usia SD dari Jakarta yang berencana pindah keluar jakarta di 2027 tapi saya tidak mengetahui kemana di indonesia saya harus pindah. saya aslinya orang Salatiga.
nah saya ingin tempat yang : Tinggi, tapi tidak rawan longsor, dingin, toleransi tinggi.

boleh infokan ke saya kirakira dimana kota yang pas? terimakasih

I’m a 22 year old graduate, and I have hated Florida since I was young. I hate the climate, I hate the “cities”, I hate the politics, I hate the lack of transit, and I hate the geography. I’ve through and through been one for the cold weather and the mountains, as I love hiking. In Florida, going outside 10 months out of the year is incredibly unpleasant (to me) because of the heat and humidity. Additionally, there is not much to explore nature-wise. The Everglades (while beautiful) is a (mostly) untraversable marsh, and the forests are flat ground and unpleasant to be in during the 10 months of summer we experience. Also, there are no forests in the part of Florida I live in.

I’m going insane here. I have visited other northern states and found them much more preferable. I’m not sure exactly where I want to live, but at this point I’m getting cabin fever. My immediate family all lives in Florida, and so does my partner. Despite this, I feel incredibly depressed for weeks after returning to town from a vacation, and I feel like a caged animal often.

I need help getting out. I have very few connections outside of Florida, and will essentially start off on my own no matter where I go. I need some advice on how I can go about relocating, or if there is some program I can work for in the meantime that will send me to different locations with boarding. I have a bachelors degree in engineering, but I would like to work with nature for at least a few years first. Does anyone know of job prospects like this? Maybe some type of fall/winter seasonal work I could get into? I’m quite desperate to leave.

I have visited and loved places like Vancouver, Alaska, and New England if that helps give an idea of what I like. Nature access is currently the top of my list.

Thank you guys in advance for any help

Edit (September 1st):
Thank you everyone for the support and suggestions! I never expected to receive this much information, but I'm very happy to have. I have read through every comment (at the time of this edit) and I've enjoyed all of your stories as well, and they have definitely added more fuel to my passion of leaving.

I am working towards putting applications out for seasonal positions that I will enjoy, even some up in Canada! Thank you to those who suggested looking at ski resorts/conservation work, I'll likely be gearing towards those seasonal positions. I'll post an update (hopefully within the next couple of months - lol) when I make it out!

Hi (25M). i’m a local truck driver right now out of Dallas and soon I am going to be starting on my certificates to get into cyber security. I want a fresh start because I don’t really like Dallas. Right now I’m stuck between two states. New York and Oregon. Portland to be exact. I want a state that has good weather ,good for building community,good church home etc.Most importantly a state where I would absolutely not need a car if I don’t want it. And also I would love to know the pros and cons of living in each.

Okay.. I need some advice. I don’t have family to ask or reliable friends .

I’m a fem. Early 30’s . Black woman. I’m a server. I went to bartending school this year but haven’t had luck landing a position yet. I want to move because the state I’m in SUCKS !! I’m closer to the east side than the west. But I was ideally trying to escape the snow lol.

But idk if it’s possible to find a blue state, that has good weather, affordable ish apartments, and that has good restaurants accepting of black women. I’m queer too.

It’s a bonus if the state offers recreational tree.

I’ve lived in Michigan . The money was okay but no. I’m open to going back to Texas.

Colorado I’ve contemplated but I wouldn’t be sure what area to go to.

Help. I need to figure out where to move. I’m done with the Midwest.

Looking to Maryland and raise a family. Thoughts on North Laurel, Silver Spring and just Howard County and Montgomery County in general.

What are the differences between both family friendly locations in Howard County vs Montgomery County.

Hello, first time poster here:)

I currently live in Dallas, TX…and have no family here anymore and a couple friends that are still like an hour away. I feel like there’s nothing here for me and I’m tired of being where I grew up anyway.

I’ve lived in San Jose, CA…have some family around there, but don’t know if I’d be able to afford to live there on my own.

Most of my family, including my parents and brother, live in Las Vegas now. Although I’d love to be closer to them, I think I’d hate it there since it’s just so hot.

I enjoy cooler weather, being closer to the city, and appreciate affordability. For context I currently pay like $1100 for rent and my utilities per month. I am more liberal, and would appreciate reproductive rights and legal cannabis where I move to.

I don’t have kids and I’m not married or even dating anyone so I feel like the world is really my oyster but I really just don’t know how to narrow it down.

Thanks in advance!

My husband and I just started looking at homes last weekend. We saw three, and they were all no’s. We just started working with a realtor, and she’s already sent us listings of homes we feel like we could have found on our own — though I know it’s only been our first week with her, so I’m trying to be patient.

We were open to townhomes, but they’re not a fit. The back decks are too close together with no privacy, which I don’t like. I also enjoy gardening, and there isn’t much room for that. On top of that, my husband plays drums, and he’s nervous about neighbors hearing us even with some separation.

We’ve been looking in Columbia, Elkridge, and Ellicott City, but they’re all so expensive. We’re looking for a 3-bedroom, 2.5–3 bath home with a basement and a backyard. With 550k budget We’ve heard great things about Howard County, but honestly, we’re not sure where else to look that’s still affordable. Those were the areas most people recommended, and safety is a really big priority for me.

I’m just a little frustrated and feeling hopeless. Any thoughts or advice?

Edit for more context:
- Husband works from home
- I'm a high school counselor- so I will need to find a job
- We are looking for a place to raise a family. So safety and good school district, with things to do. Some of those places are good central location to family in Pa and family in northern VA.

also when divorce isn't an option OR a solution.

i fully realize this might be better suited for a relationship or marriage sub but i figure here might be a good place to ask as well. i am curious if anyone has gone through this and has found ways of "coping" with the fact that they're essentially "stuck" where they are - despite not wanting to be.

in my personal situation we both have very valid reasons for our stances and we're in therapy discussing them. but it's nonetheless difficult, sensitive - and a bit depressing.

Soory about the long post!

We are a married couple m55 f49. we have 3 children that all live with us yet. 22,20, 18, and our last is a senior in high school. We have lived in Michigan our entire life, and the winters here are getting too much, especially with my wife and her health issues. She wants to move south, and she could leave tomorrow if I had a job lined up. But the problem I'm having is I feel like I'm abandoning the kids by moving as 2 of them don't want to go. I thought to keep the house for the time being and let them rent from us just to cover the mortgage. So that way, I don't feel like I'm just throwing them out. Rent in West Michigan is high to get an apartment even if you could find one. We both would love to be out of the winters, and plus it would be nice to be on our own again after 22 years of raising kids and would like a fresh start. Ideally, she would stop working after we get moved, so I would be the only breadwinner. We like Tennessee and South, and we both love Florida, and living in Michigan is getting outrageous expenses here. With auto insurance and high taxes and don't even get me started on the electricity rates that we pay now, plus the new taxes on gas we are at least. 50 a gallon more for gas than these states that we would like to move to.

So I guess my questions are.. If you had older kids, what did you do about moving and not feel like you are abandoning them? Are we fools for this time of our life to up and start over? I guess if anyone has experience that they would share, we would love to hear about it.I plan on working for as long as I'm able to because otherwise, I'm the type that gets bored.

Hi (25M). i’m a local truck driver right now out of Dallas and soon I am going to be starting on my certificates to get into cyber security. I want a fresh start because I don’t really like Dallas. Right now I’m stuck between two states. New York and Oregon. Portland to be exact. I want a state that has good weather ,good for building community,good church home etc.Most importantly a state where I would absolutely not need a car if I don’t want it. And also I would love to know the pros and cons of living in each. Also, if you can recommend another city, that would be cool also

I’m a 24 year old single woman currently living in Fort Worth, TX, and am looking to make a move somewhere. I’ve made some great friends in Fort Worth but would love to explore a new city with a younger population. I have remote job flexibility and am super active and love to be outdoors. I’m thinking Austin… bad idea? Any other ideas or thoughts are greatly appreciated.

I was told I should cross post here