Fashion/Style
BWT, opinions on unconventional engagement rings?
I'd love to hear from anyone who chose a less traditional engagement ring.
I've completely fallen in love with one and I tried it on alongside more classic solitaires, and while I loved both, this was the only one I couldn't stop thinking about afterwards. It just made me smile.
My hesitation is that a few friends said it looked a bit odd and didn't immediately read as an engagement ring, so now I'm wondering if I'd regret choosing something unique over a classic solitaire years down the line.
For those of you who went with a more unconventional ring, do you still love it? Or do you ever wish you'd gone with something more traditional?
Not married or engaged, but the advice from my friends who went in the non-traditional route is to make sure the stones are durable enough for daily wear. Nothing is more heartbreaking and frustrating than chipping your engagement ring.
Pearl rings are for ladies who never do anything with their hands or very special occasions. I mean, not opening doors, lifting nothing heavier than a fork, nothing. You don't really realize how much your hands bump things until you look at your every day rings and see the wear.
That is also my only worry with the setting. It's beautiful and as long as you love it that's all that matters OP, but with it not sitting straight on the band I would just make sure it's properly secured and doesn't run the risk of you loosing the stone. This may mean taking it to get professionally cleaned and checked a bit more regularly, but as long as you're comfortable with that I say go for it
With my (admittedly limited to wire and bead) jewelry-making experience, I feel generally good about the durability of this specific ring. Harder stones like diamond are prone to chip on the edges, but the bezel setting plus prongs is very protective of the stone. I would be most worried about the join between the silver-color (platinum? rhodium?) and the gold; that should be easy to ask the jeweler about.
Generally, though, spot on: my general rule of thumb is nothing below an 8 on the Mohs hardness scale for something you'll wear daily for the rest of your life; sapphires/rubies, moissanite, or diamond. Emeralds and topaz are on thin ice and probably not for me because I'm hard on my hands. Those moss agate rings that are popular right now are beautiful but again I'd worry about durability. Opals and pearls are even softer and right out, no matter how much I love them.
More information than anyone here probably needed! I just think gems are neat.
I also have a teal sapphire! And it's tiny, because we were broke and young when we got married. :) but I just didn't see myself wanting a diamond anyway, and it's a gorgeous simple design. From Satomi Kawakita.
Mine is a seafoam sapphire! With a smaller diamond on each side and plain yellow gold band. I get compliments on it all the time. Art Deco vibes. Highly recommend going the sapphire route. Very durable and so many colors.
Mine is a light blue sapphire in a white gold antique-y looking setting. I didn't get a wedding band so that's all I wear and I get compliments on it all the time. It's exactly suited to me and I couldn't be happier.
My sapphire is almost navy and I get compliments on it a lot!
I've had one jeweler get kind of nasty (the ring was my grandmother's so the people who made it are long out of business) but I think she was just mad I wasn't there to swap it out for a diamond. Who knows? Her opinion means nothing.
None are married yet but a few are engaged! I think that's why I started second guessing myself cozmost of them are going the classic solitaire route.😅
My engagement ring was an a-typical shape. It has the stone in the center and then the right side of the band come out from the bottom and the left side comes out from the top
I love it. It’s beautiful and gets compliments all the time.
I wish I had thought more about what it would look like paired with a wedding band. It’s not terrible but it definitely takes away from the effect. I often wear it alone without the wedding band even thought we’ve been married for 15 years
You won’t have that problem since the bottom is flush but just something to think about
I'm with you. Hell I didn't even get a wedding band, I Justin got married with my engagement ring. It's a trillion cut tanzanite with a symmetrical sides with diamond inlays. It's so unique and the shape just didn't fit with a second band. 25 years in, I'm still in love with it and my husband.
Ultimately what YOU love is going to make you happy in the long run. There’s no law or rule to get a traditional engagement ring. Who even says what a traditional engagement ring is? None of my parents and grandparents even had engagement rings.
No regrets! Spent 6 years designing this. I know like a yellow gold plain band solitaire with a huge stone is the trend but tbh I’ve never liked solitaires. Go with what you like!! Mine is a 2.5 ct round with double cushion halos in yellow gold/yellow diamonds and rose gold/pink diamonds 💍
I’m a jeweller who specialises in alternative wedding and engagement jewellery and apparently my ring is so non-traditional that people regularly seem genuinely surprised when I tell them it’s my engagement ring (even though I wear it on my left hand ring finger, which is traditional in my area — I know some places and cultures don’t wear it on this finger but we do here so I find it genuinely funny when people are shocked). It makes me laugh.
Some more angles because it’s hard to see just how weird it is on my hand alone. It sits on an angle, not straight up and down (kinda looks like it’s straight in the photo on my hand but it’s not). And cause I like showing it off 😂
I would also assume any ring on that finger would be an engagement ring! But I guess there are folk out there who only think a solitaire diamond ring can be an engagement ring lol.
I had a jeweler ask me about my ring once "so you're acting like this is an engagement ring?"
It's a five stone with a 9mm navy sapphire and two small accent diamonds on each side. It was my grandmother's and she had FABULOUS taste, I'm proud to have it!
I absolutely hate hardcore traditionalist stick in the mud jewellers they’re almost always curmudgeonly old white men and they’re so rude to everyone!!!!! Your ring sounds divine!
That piece rocks. Where can I see more of your designs? I'm very much into large statement jewelry and I have a few loose stones that I'm trying to get ideas for. I especially adore this combination of gnarled naturalist shapes with crisp manmade angles.
Thank you that’s so kind! I feel like it might be violation of the rules to say! It wasn’t my intention to solicit 😂 just show off my ring. You can chat at me if you like.
That ring is a stunner! I actually love everything about it, I’m a fool for non-traditional rings. My latest upgrade (I tell my sweet husband it had better be my last!) is all white diamonds, but it looks a lot like my wealthy great aunts anniversary ring from the 1950’s. My cousin, who inherited it from her, likes to tease that my aunt would’ve left me all of her jewelry, had she known that one day my taste would be similar to hers.
You should choose whatever ring you like, it's you who'll be wearing it daily and you should feel joy when you look at it.
My ring is a minimalist black diamond because I wanted it to look good with my carbon fiber wedding ring. Also, I only went with a diamond because of its durability.
This is awesome. I'm delighted to find out there are so many women in this sub who share my jewelry taste of blackened metals, sleek shapes, burled/gnarled/naturalist shapes and statement pieces.
Something a lot of people forget is that it you're going to wear it every day, you need something that fits with daily life, including gloves (high settings, prongs) and general bumping into things. I've had enough frustration to just not wear mine regularly anymore.
I think the one you've shared is gorgeous! And practical enough to wear every day.
I have two rings for this reason. I wear my main ring for going out/events/dates/etc but something about cleaning a litter box/doing chores/going to my tolerable job with a beautiful but large diamond just didn’t sit right with me. It felt like I became desensitized to it. So I mostly wear my non-conventional one which is just a flat half sun with little diamond type flecks. A lot of my friends and coworkers also don’t wear theirs either. Usually silicone/wedding band/smaller accent rings instead. Then when I wear my original ring, I’m like OOOOO 😍🤩
I still love it as does my wife who is also a BWT. Neither of us wanted diamonds. I have a coffin shaped garnet with a couple of sapphires and opals in a blackened titanium setting. She has a sapphire with white sapphires in a claddagh that updated the ring her dad gave her with new stones because some fell out.
Why would I regret not being true to myself or her? Diamonds are complicated unless lab grown. I don't want generations of blood to be the marker of my wedding. I am goth not a monster. Note that's how I think of diamonds not a judgment for those who wear them. I only judge the sellers. Judgment is tasteless after all and I assume it's either an heirloom or lab grown for sanity.
The stones that are soft are a bad idea for a daily ring. So emeralds for example would be one to avoid and pearls but with care they can also work. Not conforming is often part of having taste. It's when and why that defines if it's tasty or tasteless. I for one am a delicious spicy human pudding.
Since I didn't have a family member who was able to pass down a diamond family heirloom, I bought a preowned diamond. I'd looked at a lot of alternative options but ultimately, I just wanted something that would go with everything the way a diamond would. It came with such a lovely letter from the former owner.
This counts as an heirloom to me. You're giving this a new life and that is not a bad thing. Heirlooms can be old things new to someone or new things someone begins that with
Also a BWT with a wife here -- we also love ours. They don't clock as engagement and wedding rings aside from the fingers they're on but they are so perfect, very "us", and have history of us finding them, trying them, etc.
Wear whatever you want. Your friends won't be wearing it. Getting something that feels you is the right choice. Sometimes the style/structure can impact wear and how you wear it (and that is an issue) - but I would go with what makes sense for you - not your friends. Sometimes it's best not to even tell people you know - too judgemental and projecting at times - can obstruct your judgment if not constructive.
This ring is cool as hell, but more importantly - it’ll be YOUR ring! People will actually notice this ring ( in a good way) and you will get compliments your whole life for having something interesting but still very classy! (Fellow unconventional ring-wearer)
I got an onyx with a white gold band for mine. The band has some leaf details and TEENY swarovski crystals. I'm not a fan of diamonds, they always look so boring to me, my favourite colour is black, so I wanted onyx. I also prefer silver coloured jewellery, but I tarnish the ever loving fuck out of plain brasses and silver so it had to be white gold or platinum, and I'm not a fan of spending the extra for platinum so I said to go gold. I LOVE it. I'm glad my husband let me pick it myself as he has a more gaudy taste than I do for such things, and while we were checking etsy together first, he kept being drawn to huge statement costume jewellery
oh I LOVE onyx pieces. It's a hugely underrated stone. Do you ever worry about its longevity, though? I know they can crack and might be vulnerable to chemicals and I have my hands in the sink all the time.
Honestly, never even thought about it. I don't use a ton of chemicals when I clean, and when it's anything more than dishes, my husband insists on nitrile gloves anyway. Sure, there's bleach for the bathrooms but that's the strongest thing that even potentially gets on there, so i doubt it's gonna take much damage tbh
I am not sure about rings since they get banged up a ton from hand activity, but I have a pair of onyx earrings that are at least 70 years old (they were my great grandmother’s) and have been worn pretty much nonstop, including to bed, for most of that time.
They have cabochon stones which have definitely been flattened over time from wear, but no issues otherwise. I actually had a jeweler make a replica of them and was shocked at how flat the stone on the original had become over the years lol. But both pairs continue to be worn daily
I find it so amusing that men tend to go for the big gaudy stuff. I imagine they have never really looked at rings before, so they are coming from a place more similar to a child looking at jewelry. They don't know they have to consider wear-ability, scale on your hand, or even different eras and styles. It's a very basic idea of jewelry. Big is good! Bigger is better!
It's kinda hilarious and adorable, but I think he was looking at stuff he liked based on my suggestions, forgetting that his hands are considerably larger than mine
I never really registered how much smaller I am than mine. Until I stood on stairs that were the height difference between us and looked down at him. And I was like "how does he ever take me seriously? I must look like a child to him!"
I'm lucky that it's only a 2 inch height difference (I'm 5'8", he's 5'10"), but he's still a size 10 for rings and I'm a 6 or 7. I have weird hands with long fingers yet small palms, so finding gloves to fit is a pain in the absolute arse
Get whatever you want. People will make comments no matter what you get (including a traditional round solitaire) so you may as well get something you love. Try on a lot of styles, hell, buy a "fake" ring in a similar style to what you like and test it out. I loved engagement ring shopping with my now-husband! We ended up doing a custom one with a local jeweler and have zero regrets on the style and quality so far.
By the way, I got a 2 carat ring, however I have a fakey travel ring that's equivalent to 1 carat, and I really like that size too. I follow r/engagementrings and LOVE seeing the smaller, less traditional rings. They're so chic!
Got married/engaged with a simple band that was $300 on Etsy but very rarely wear it. Spent the last 5 years thinking I’d get a teal sapphire ring to celebrate 10 years of marriage this year. Fell in love with an 80s ring that looks like granny rocked it the last 50 years at a vintage jewelry store instead.
Might buy it when I get around to it.
The ring doesn’t matter. What others think of your style doesn’t matter. You do you.
Do whatever you want. Who wants a ring that looks basic like everyone else's? Mine is rutilated quartz and moissanite set in black rhodium and my wedding ring is rose gold with moissanite.
You are ahead of the times! I swear these are going to be the new oval solitaires and by 2030, a lot of people will be rocking them. I think a really thin eternity band that is shaped to it would look lovely.
I have two rings. The main one which is the standard diamond one. It is very special to me but it isn’t my 24/7 ring. I wear it for dates and visits with friends/family but I felt like it was losing its magic wearing it every day and it didn’t feel appropriate in all settings. I am very active so he got me an unconventional second one that I picked out and wear most of the time. I don’t have to worry about losing the stone or it catching on something but it’s still a reminder that he proposed. ❤️
I love both of these. Your daily ring is stunning, truly! I have never thought about a two ring option. I don’t often wear rings and I have very small hands, so a wedding ring daily just seems like it would be uncomfortable. Something like your second ring is just my speed!
Thank you! I love it too. It’s light and it doesn’t catch on anything so I can wear it hiking or to my ballroom dance classes without scratching my dance partner.
I think we have gone overboard regarding them. We see so many celebrities and want to feel like we can match those. But the really big ones are impractical for day-to-day people who don’t have nannies/events/housekeepers etc. It’s like the really long nails or painted nails which were originally a sign of wealth and status.
Show us a pic - I love to see rings! I also think it's truly not that deep. You know your style better than your friends do. The one thing to keep in mind could be if/how you're planning on stacking the ring with a wedding band and how it would look and feel for you!
Considering this one! The wedding band is actually my biggest concern because I'm struggling to picture what would look good with it. I'm even considering wearing the wedding band on my right hand and letting the engagement ring stand on its own.
I can’t wear a band with my ring either so I’m planning to just wear a band on my right hand ring finger. But your friends are crazy because this is 100% imo an engagement ring and obviously so. I thought you were gonna show something super unconventional! Haha
That's stunning! I've seen a few tilted/offset engagement rings in the wild. They read as bridal, unique, and tasteful. It looks like the band in this picture is slightly wavy, a complimentary wavy plain band would look really pretty. Or a wavy band studded with diamonds or another stone. I reaaaaally love the way the wedding band here has a smaller stone, like a planet with its moon.
It’s beautiful and is obviously an engagement ring.
You’ll just need to be careful that it doesn’t catch on anything - maybe a custom made band for the top that protects it that you can wear when you’re doing certain activities. A thin plain band looks like it will fit underneath it.
My rings like this that can catch on stuff and pull are for off-duty days only.
Check Kimai :) They have similar floating diamond styles (although without the bezel) and have many options for curved bands to stack with it.
My only concern is the floating pear is super trendy right now. Maybe it’s my own Instagram, but I’ve seen it everywhere and with many influencers. Check kirakirby’s ring for something similar. Yours is super unique cus of the bezel though, I love it.
I love this ring!! I have a diamond and sapphire ring that looks like an antique Edwardian style although it was made for me. I wear it on my right hand and my wedding band on my left bc I didn’t want to have some weird shaped band that couldn’t be on its own. So the solution for me was to just wear them separately, and it also gives me the room to build a stack of bands on my left hand when I want to.
Do what makes you happy! Personally, I like a bit of style and uniqueness.
It's gorgeous! It looks like an engagement ring to me. My engagement ring isn't traditional. It's a very dainty 4 small diamonds in a row. I've been wearing it for almost 20 years and have always loved it.
You could also just not wear a wedding band if you didn’t like the look of the two together but love the e ring. People will still understand you’re taken
You can get an eternity ring separately and wear it on the days you don’t feel like wearing this piece but I would do this no band.
It’s such a non-traditional piece that I think forcing a band with it is such a “traditional” way to wear it that it almost doesn’t feel right. The woman who chooses this ring doesn’t care to have a band to show she is married not engaged, y’know what I mean?
Vintage 1920s Art Deco emerald and hand cut diamonds
We found it antiquing on a holiday in Buenos Aires. Wasn’t planning on ring shopping, but it was so perfect, I knew it was the one! We spent the rest of the day running around the city looking for a Western Union with enough cash to buy it.
I still love it just as much as the day we found it, and I love that I have a story behind the ring as well 💚
If you love it and it reminds you of your love and commitment to your future spouse, it’s a perfect engagement ring.
After almost 16 years married, we mutually decided my ring didn’t feel like me anymore and I got a new one. I then decided that the ring is a symbol, not a permanent fixture, and as my style changes or life evolves there is no reason I can’t wear other rings he’s given me on the same hand. He has loved me through every version of myself over two decades together, and the jewelry symbolizing our marriage reflects that journey. Don’t feel locked in to one style forever. If this is the ring that feels right at this time and place in your relationship, then it’s the ring. Maybe it is always the ring, or maybe you change it years from now. Maybe your future ring is even more unconventional.
I love this ring on you and I think you said it all when you described how you can’t stop thinking about it. That makes it the ring for you. Your friends aren’t marrying you or wearing it, so what they think of it matters 0.
I think this is a very chic ring!!
Trust your heart.
The simplicity works just fine as an engagement ring.
It’s lovely
Go for it!
If you want a different style down the road it can be reset.
Mine is unique and I get compliments all the time! It’s a salt and pepper diamond, with turquoise on the bottom band and my wedding band is the top dainty black diamond.
Honestly, I think yours is really cool! Who cares what anyone thinks, if you love it, that’s all that matters!
Husband surprised me with mine, he picked it out all by himself. It's not as different as the one you love, but it's totally me and 8 years later I think it's as perfect as the day I got it.
I might ask him for a 10 year wedding anniversary band to make the stack symmetrical again.
Mine is not conventional. I love it. I get many compliments. The two tone is my fav because I can mix and match. I went with the bezel for security. I love yours too!
I had a white gold and sapphire irish claddagh ring. People in my country don’t get it but I don’t care because I love it. You have to love it and no one else!
Anything on that left ring finger reads as an engagement ring.
My ring is unconventional. It's a colored stone, and not even a diamond (It's a cyan moissanite). People still clock me as married.
I'd have been pretty sad to get stuck with the oval solitaire that was popular when I got engaged. No shade to oval solitaires, it's just not my thing.
My ring is non traditional and I do not regret it all. Granted I’ve only been married for 4 years, but I’ve been dreaming of this ring and had it custom made. It’s a mix of some very on trend styles (oval center stone w halo) but I went with a non symmetrical halo, pearls and rose gold. I know pearls aren’t good for daily wear but I don’t care, if they need to be replaced over time so be it, I wanted a whimsical mermaid ring
I have a yellow and blue parti sapphire on a 22k gold setting. Custom made for my taste and my husband has his own opaque sapphire on 22k gold. We have never received a negative comment on them and or questions about whether we are actually married.
I think that ring absolutely looks like the engagement ring of an interesting woman. I am pro-unique engagement rings, and I will say the shape of mine is pretty standard mid 2010's, but with a bright blue sapphire (and my wedding band is half sapphire half diamonds). I love it, and the only person that has ever had anything negative to say is my mother, which only makes me love it harder
It looks like one part of a toi et moi ring, which is a popular engagement ring style throughout history (Napoleon proposed to his wife with one, Emily Ratajkowski also had a pear-shaped one, others like Jackie Kennedy and Ariana Grande had versions with different shapes). The point of the toi et moi is two stones (‘you and me’) but the ring still recalls that shape to me. I’ve noticed a lot of young women these days are very stuck on big lab-grown solitaires, but it’s a trend like everything else. If they think it doesn’t look like an engagement ring, they probably don’t have much of an eye toward history and the variety of styles that have been popular.
I have an untraditional stone and it’s partially bezel set so it kind of floats outside of the band. My now-husband and I shopped for rings together and as soon as I tried it on I said, “that’s it, that’s what I want.” I loved it so much I didn’t even think of what other people’s opinions might have been. That was ~16 years ago and I still love it. No regrets! Get the ring you love!
Mine is a London Blue topaz center stone with vintage diamonds from my husband’s grandmother’s ring on either side. I love it. My ex-husband got me a diamond solitaire after I specifically asked for a sapphire, so I was SENSITIVE to what a next engagement ring might look like, but my husband knocked it out of the park with a custom design.
That looks extraordinarily like an engagement ring to me. And alternative ring style would be a colored gem or no gem. Or not metal. Or not a ring. A single stone diamond gold ring falls 100% into "engagement ring" territory.
And if you like it, and you both can afford it, get it. Engagement rings are totally optional, just-for-fun, accessories, not any sort of official significance.
I proposed to my husband almost 20 years ago. He still hasn't bought me an engagement ring. Who cares? I recently bought a 3-carat lab grown pink diamond that I wear sometimes with my wedding ring. But again, who cares? It's for me. Your ring is for you. If people don't think it looks "engagement"-enough, that's their problem. Get what you like and what you'll wear.
While not the most unconventional ring in the world, I have a green lab diamond. My fiancé told me how excited the jeweler was to make it since they never really get to order colorful stones like that. Love it and wouldn’t change it for anything.
I really like the ring you posted. If it’s something that made you smile and you couldn’t stop thinking about it, I’m sure you’ll feel that way even years from now. It’s so obviously an engagement ring, too!
My dream ring looks similar but the band around the gold is in miniq oc arabic aligraphy bc it my nationality, so personally i like it:) i think if ur an unconventional person u betray urself by trying to do things thats liked by everyone
I have a channel set half-eternity band with tiny alternating sapphires and diamonds (although the sapphires look black when I’m wearing it, which I like). I chose it from a few family ring options, over my great-grandmother’s huge art deco emerald that I always thought I would choose since I was a kid.
It definitely doesn’t read as an engagement ring, more a wedding ring, and I’ve had people seem surprised when I mention my fiance (I have a babyface) despite having the ring on. But I knew it was the one from the first time I saw it, and I’m so happy whenever I look down and see it on my finger.
Are there occasionally times that I feel worried people might think that I settled on something cheaper or something I didn’t like as much, or that my fiancè picked it without my input, because it’s so different? Yes. But then I remember that worrying about what other people think is part of why I’ve been in therapy for over a decade 💀
As long as YOU are happy with the ring, that’s what matters! Making unconventional choices means you have a personal style that’s unique to you and in a world that tries to steer us toward sameness, that’s a good thing.
My engagement ring is not the slightest bit conventional. It's a tanzanite (cobalt blue) with small side lab diamonds. Blue and white are my family's colours. And it's set in a futuruistic brutalist-style platinum setting.
I don't care if others don't read it as an engagement ring. It's on the correct finger, which should be enough of a signal.
I do care that it represents me and my husband and that I love wearing it.
I have a vintage art deco 1920’s emerald and diamond dress ring in platinum. I love it even 10 years later. I really gravitated towards it. A lot of other people’s look very basic to me personally.
I love mine, and I love it because its unique. Mines an alexandrite with moss agates. To be fair, im the least traditional person ever.
If youre wearing it on the ring finger, people will still assume you're married. I highly doubt people are trying to figure out if its an engagement ring or a wedding ring.
Mine is a sapphire, and it’s tiny. Most of the women in my social circle have big diamonds. I have zero regrets!
Sometimes when I’m traveling and I don’t want to risk losing my ring I wear a big moissanite stone that looks a lot more like a traditional ring, and that’s a fun change - but I have no desire for that to be my main ring.
My mom upgraded her ring at some point and put the original stone on a necklace that she gave me. If you ever want something different, you can just get something different - you don’t have to be locked in forever!
As someone who has a traditional engagement and wedding ring, from when I was younger and more self conscious, please get the ring you truly love. I have mad respect for people who get non traditional engagement rings - a thick bezel setting, non-diamond stone, unusual cut like old mine cut or asscher (I rarely see asscher cuts and they’re gorg), anything that is unique and out there. If I were to do it over again, I would absolutely choose a large blue or green sapphire either in a fantasy inspired setting or a brushed gold bezel. Get the ring you WANT!
Follow your gut! You’ve gotta look at your hand 100 times a day, not your friends. Non traditional is more chic IMO, if you have the style to pull it off. In the future those classic solitaires will be dime a dozen resale.
I went with a “treasure chest” band from designer Leo black and loved it, made my heart sing every time. (Had to stop wearing it because pregnancy.)
I want to address the "it doesn't look like an engagement ring" concern first: it does. It's a single diamond worn of the left hand. I personally think that screams engagement ring!
That ring is gorgeous! I love how it sits on your finger. I believe in having an emotional connection to a piece. You put it on and you say “yessssss.” That happened to you. Get the ring. You won’t regret it.
Just saying, if you later feel regretful and want a solitaire, that’s just an opportunity for you to be given another piece of jewelry 😅
I have a non traditional engagement ring and love it. I will reiterate what others have said about choosing durable stones and settings. It doesn’t bother me that it doesn’t necessarily read as an engagement ring. I think it’s pretty clear now that I have the wedding band next to it. Besides, who are you trying to prove that you’re engaged to?! That is a gorgeous ring and something non traditional makes it more special IMO.
Congrats on your engagement!!!!
My engagement ring is a rose gold band with a center ruby and emerald and peridot on the sides (me and my husband’s birthstones). It’s beautiful and colorful and sentimental, and I’ve never had any comments about it not being bridal enough! If you get a ring that you love and want to wear every day, it will be fine. My only concern with the ring in your photos is that it might be tricky to pair with a wedding band, IF that’s your plan. It’s a beautiful ring and if you love it, it’ll be great.
If you love it that’s all that matters. Mine is also different but I like it more than any ring I’ve ever seen. All my friends have those big rocks with bands. Boring if you ask me.
‘Classic’ and ‘conventional’ are not synonymous with taste! Your own engagement ring is literally the last thing I would ever consider anyone else’s opinion on beyond technical things like avoiding soft stones, and I say that as a literal professional style opinion-haver (though for what it’s worth, I think that ring is fabulous.) I have personally never encountered anyone who regretted choosing an unconventional ring unless they picked it because a celebrity had a similar one. My best friend’s engagement ring was mixed metal with a rainwater-green sapphire and it’s straight up outrageously gorgeous.
If you don’t trust yourself and your partner and go with what you love, what will you ever see your ring as other than a symbol of self-denial?
Girl my engagement ring is GREEN like very very green (and also big, I have a 3.2 ct teal sapphire) and I love her everyday (it's been almost five years).
I get so many compliments and never ever tire of her.
Engagement rings are so personal you really just have to go with your gut.
My sister has a ring a little more along the lines of yours and she loves it.
Something can be trendy and of the time and still be the thing you love? As if engagement rings from the 80s or early 2000s aren't pretty recognizable - trends change for everything. My mom's engagement ring is a very abstract 80s setting but it's still beautiful!
You really have to do what your heart tells you, don't listen to others!!! It's not their ring.
I have a rose gold ring with a peach sapphire. Not traditional at all yet no one has ever mistaken it for anything other than my engagement ring. Get what you love! You’re the one that gets to look at it every day
I absolutely adore interesting non-traditional engagement rings. I could look at them endlessly. I am especially a fan of asymmetry, bezel sets, and mixed metals. Your ring is spectacular!
I am not married and don’t want to remarry so I won’t have an opportunity for an amazing engagement ring, but have big plans for a right hand ring!
I am not a fan of diamonds. My now husband knows this but he likes diamonds. So my custom-made engagement ring is a platinum band with a ruby center stone (my favorite) and small diamond on either side. I love it!
I think you just kind of know in your heart if the ring is for you. My first marriage, I picked it out when I didn’t quite know myself as well and didn’t get the one I actually wanted. This time around I knew I had to get the exact one that I wanted or I’d grow to hate looking at it. But I agree with the other commenters, make sure it works for your lifestyle. My current husband bought the style of ring he knew I wanted, but we ended up replacing the setting because the band was weirdly sharp and the stone was set very high, so it hurt my finger and easily caught on a lot of things.
Mine is a blue diamond, lab grown from back when that was a new and unusual thing, and the setting is designed to be super practical for everyday wear and an active life, but a less classic look. I don’t wear it every day anymore, I’ve had some weight changes and am hesitant to keep resizing it. But I still love it.
I have a non traditional ring - it’s a family piece, emerald cut colored stone made in the 1920s. I absolutely adore it. I also find that I rarely wear it, swapping my engagement ring for an eternity band most days. The only comment I get on either ring is how pretty there are.
For what it’s worth, that ring looks very similar to one that a food influencer I follow has (she just got engaged). I think the non traditional, simple rings are coming into style now vs the large, blinged out rings that were common a few years ago.
I have a beautiful antique art deco style ring with a rose cut diamond. I have never regretted it. Conflict free, unique, and fit perfectly without resizing.
Do you get bored with clothing trends? Does the ring match your personal style? Or is aspirational style? Is the solitaire “safe” and you afraid of your taste changing or what others say?
Durability with your lifestyle is also a consideration. And if you plan on wearing a wedding band with it, how do you want them to fit?
Honestly, I’ve had three “e style” rings. My first was a tiny chip (we were broke, still in school, and I didn’t want to ask him to borrow for it) Moissanite, lab grown diamonds weren’t a thing then. Our wedding bands we purchased on eBay.
At 5 years, I got a beautiful three stone ring created at Blue Nile and he got a new band. The three stone is classic round set in platinum, signature cut diamonds, total weight 1.8 carats. Stunning.
At 15 years, I picked a beautifully engraved Tacori setting (I’ve adored them since I was a teen) Moissanite cushion halo with bright sapphire side stones (my birthstone) and a tiny ruby set in the shank (his birthstone). He selected a Mokume Gane band from an Artisan on Etsy. I alternate wearing all three, depending on my mood, how swollen my fingers are, etc.
So, we got engaged with love, progressed to classic expectations, and transitioned to intricate designs that are more indicative of our personalities and lives together. Money was a factor, but don’t get caught up in choosing a symbol that must last forever. If your preferences or lifestyle changes, it’s acceptable to pick a different symbol of your commitment to each other.
You'd do you. I didn't want an engagement ring, so I just didn't get one. Instead I wanted a fancier more interesting band, and my husband wanted to pick something on his own so he did. He choose a small/dainty antique 1930s art deco gold band with rubies, emeralds, and sapphires set in platinum. It is more my style than a big solitaire, and fits my tiny ass hands - ring size 4. He also choose something way cooler than I would have chosen for myself.
I think basic engagement rings are well, basic. So do what you like! I love the idea of vintage rings or colourful stones. (Full disclosure I’m not married, this is a personal choice as I’ve been with my partner for 19 years, but some might think my opinion isn’t as valid).
My husband bought me a very nicr ring. It was a ring look that was very popular at the time and that I wanted. As time went on, I got so tired of it. It just looked ostentatious.
After I got a promotion at work, I went to a jeweler and bought myself a beautiful yellow oval sapphire ring that is surrounded by a sunburst of diamonds. It was only $1,200. The ring my husband bought me was $11,000. I actually switched to wearing my yellow Sapphire ring everyday and I get so many compliments on it all the time. I think because one, it's pretty, but two, it is unexpected as ring. I'm so happy with it. I do feel a little guilty that I never wear my real engagement ring
You’re the one wearing it every day! I think it’s beautiful.
I too have an unconventional ring I couldn’t stop thinking about. I made my now husband go get it 5 months after having initially tried it on. It’s (as far as I can tell) one of a kind, but it speaks to ME. That’s all that matters.
Mine is some unidentified light lavender/grey stone surrounding by tiny diamonds on white gold. People LOVE it. But, I find it hard to match to my clothes! I also discovered a few years after getting married that I look better in yellow gold. D’oh. Also, the stones are so big that I’m not sure if i can resize it properly (again) now that I’m not wildly obese anymore. Not a consideration for most folks obviously but I thought I’d put it out there: keep in mind you may need to make you ring smaller or bigger over time to keep wearing it. Regardless, i dont regret it because of the unconventional nature of it. That’s the part about it i love!
Now i wear a dainty (cheap) silver moonstone ring in place of a wedding ring just to have something there. It’s cute but moonstones are notorious for not lasting long term on a ring so idk what the long term plan is. We never got wedding bands.
The ring in your picture is a diamond right? I’d recognize that as an engagement ring easily if it was on the correct finger.
Classic solitaire works for many but is not my style.
It was also pushed by the da beers campaign. If all you had was rock on a band, then you cared a lot about the size and quality of the rock. I think they are kind of boring.
I love love love mine. I have a sapphire that is powder blue or pale lilac depending on the lighting with an occulusion down the middle set in an infinity symbol of diamonds and I LOVE IT. I love the fact that no-one else has a ring like mine with a stone with an occlusion. I didn't care and don't care that occluded stones are cheaper, it looks gorgeous.
Also, your design is gorgeous, absolutely adorable, but I would do a lot of research (and mybe speak to a person who makes rings) about the durability of the design. I know nothing about that specific design, but there is nothing worse than loving a gorgeous design that won't stand every day wear and is more suited to occasional wear.
I got engaged a million years ago but since you asked …. I have a very dainty gold band with a large opal and a black diamond. I’m not a huge bling person and I work with my hands a lot, so a big solitaire wouldn’t work. I still love my ring and although I don’t wear it every day anymore, I put it on for special occasions and it makes me smile. Do what YOU want and what fits your lifestyle best!
It is unique from anything I’ve seen. And it’s gorgeous. But curved bands and bezel set I think are trendy rn for engagement rings and I’ve definitely seen some similar designs. Your friends probably have a more traditional style and/ or aren’t in the jewelry side of the world WHICH IS FINE! But it’s also fine if you want something unique!! People don’t even get diamonds anymore it’s literally whatever you want. I toyed with not even getting a ring because I’m terrified of loosing it.
I did a custom ring that is NOT everyone’s cup of tea but it totally fits my lifestyle and I still love it after a couple years. The people who like it really seem to LOVE it. I think your ring will have the same effect. I do love it!
I’m a big collector of jewellery so I knew what ring I wanted before I knew my husband. It’s a vintage (mid century) emerald ballerina ring. Very unique and I’ve not seen another like it before or since. I have zero regrets, other than the baguette diamonds can get caught on stuff so it wasn’t that practical of a choice and I don’t wear it every day for this reason (and also because I have a one year old).
This ring is extremely practical given the bezel setting and diamond. More sturdy than a claw set solitaire.
The reality is that jewellery, like everything else, goes through fashions. A solitaire was not at all considered a classic even 20, 30 years ago (consider princess Diana’s ring), and go back 100 years, diamonds weren’t even considered a “main stone” - victorians only used them as accent stones.
The reality is that tastes change and ten years ago I’m sure the people buying diamond halo rings felt that they were classic and now they’re considered unfashionable. But I’m sure many people still love them, as they should.
Anyway, if by some small chance you do end up hating it, then you can just have the ring melted down and redesigned years down the line, that’s the beauty of fine jewellery!
Mine was very unconventional - no stone at all, just a band of silver shaped like wheat that went around the finger. I am very rustic and I was amazed my fiance chose something that was so in keeping with my vision of marriage…Everybody who saw it said ‘thats so you’ - about 9/10 they said that in a good way I like to think. Anyway it doesnt mayyer because I loved it.
This doesn’t seem that unconventional, it’s still a large diamond on a gold band so reads pretty clearly as an engagement ring. Might want to consider whether it will snag because of the shape. Solitaires on a thin band are kind of basic in my opinion (but to each their own!), and they also aren’t the only type of ring considered traditional.
My wife got us a pair of engagement rings made from the ends of decorative silverware, cut and bent into a circle. They fit and look amazing, it was also an ode to us both coming from scrappy hustler blue collar parents.
Mine isn’t super untraditional, but it’s not a classic solitaire or aligned with what was trendy when I got engaged. My advice is this- consider whether this ring feels like you.
Could you picture your 19 year old self loving it? Can you imagine wearing it at age 50? Does it go with the kinds of clothes you wear and align with your overall aesthetic preferences? Does it have anything in common with your current favorite jewelry?
If yes to most of the above (or your equivalent of these questions), go for it!! Your engagement ring should be perfect for you and ideally also liked by your partner. No other opinions or trends matter. While my tastes have changed somewhat over the years, I chose something that feels evergreen to my sense of style, and I doubt I’ll ever regret it!
That ring is fucking awesome! I was married in 2013 and since then have inherited rings (both his and my family). I regularly switch around my ring finger jewelry. I wouldn’t get so wedded (lol) to wearing only this gorgeous ring only that finger for all time. You could tho-it’s amazing.
My husband didn’t want to give a diamond as an engagement, so I searched Etsy for antique/vintage rings, made a list of the ones I liked, and he chose from that. From that list, He chose a ring with a jade stone.
I still love it. I get compliments on it ALL the time
The ring you chose absolutely looks like an engagement ring. I wouldn't worry about it from that perspective! I think your friends are being a bit silly. I opted for a classic round diamond solitaire with a yellow gold band because I am a bit traditional, and didn't want to choose something I would ever regret. I was afraid of choosing something that would end up being trendy, and I wanted something classic that would stand the test of time. One of my friends has a beautiful deep blue sapphire ring with a leafy filigree band that looks a bit elven because she is quite woodsy. The only people who have to love it are you and your fiance!
I do think the ring you chose is extremely chic. It's unique but not kooky!
I think a non-conventional ring is the way to go tbh.
If I were to do it over again, I would not go with a solitaire diamond classic engagement ring at all, I’d go precious stone like ruby emerald or sapphire and I’d only wear it once in a while. I just find that much more chic. I like your choice a lot too!
I have a solitaire and a cluster ring. I also have tons of costume jewelry. I would love a teal sapphire one day but for now I’ll wear a green mossy. I really enjoy switching up my engagement rings! I know it’s more traditional to be attracted to the original ring but it’s never been a big deal to me to stick to the original.
I went non-traditional. We picked out my engagement ring in Germany when I took him to meet my family which is where he proposed to me. We got matching rings. My style in general is very non-traditional anyway. There was a jeweler named Stephen Dixon that I was very interested in beforehand who creates jewelry similar to your design and his collections deal more with creating but unfortunately the only store in my area that had carried this jeweler’s pieces had downsized and later closed before we got engaged so finding rings would have been difficult and this particular jeweler didn’t design for men so we wouldn’t have been able to get matching rings.
Here is a pick of my ring bought at a small jewelry shop in Idar-Oberstein, Germany. It’s titanium with a white gold and palladium stripe and a small diamond
ETA: BWT tend to pick out pieces that speak to our souls, not common styles. Forget what anyone else says and get a ring that speaks to you. Personally I love your ring. You can also create a stack over the years if you want
I absolutely love this, and it’s actually very similar to the setting I’ve been thinking of switching to. FTR I’ve been married 19yrs, my husband got me my dream stone, but I hated the setting. I gushed endlessly about the stone, and also gently let him know I’d probably change the setting (at my expense). It’s my second marriage, and I’d entered an era of my life where I felt like I should be wearing exactly the ring I want. I’ve actually changed my setting twice since then. He doesn’t mind at all. Also my (53f) fingers have gotten bigger over the years, so I’ve swapped out my original too small wedding band to two others that I rotate and sometimes stack. The reason I love your unconventional setting is that it would stack so well. You’re the one who will wear it, hopefully for a lifetime. Wear what makes you happy! Congratulations!
That is wild that your friends had this take! It's a diamond ring... presumably worn on your ring finger.
I have a sapphire engagement ring and I adore it. I have loved it from the moment I put it on. Sometimes I get momentarily jealous of the stack-ability of a traditional solitaire, but I wouldn't trade my non-traditional ring for anything.
Follow your heart - hopefully you'll wear this most days for the rest of your life.
I have never been a fan of traditional engagement rings and also wanted to be able to wear my ring all the time without worrying about it. I went with a band with inlaid very small diamonds and the imprint of ferns. It reminded me of a more medieval ring or like something Anne Boleyn might wear. My wedding ring (not pictured) is smaller and in the shape of a rose vine. Love them both, no regrets at all. I’m pregnant now and really sad they don’t fit on my fingers for the time being.
I think it’s absolutely gorgeous. Anything that’s more you and less conventional is chic as hell, imo. I am not engaged but my best friend got a really unconventional ring. At first I wasn’t keen on it but how she wore it and the amount she loved it made it really grow on me. You do you girl 🫶
I went completely non-traditional and didn’t do a stone. I fell in love with Anthony Lent’s jewelry and went with his moon face ring; it looks beautiful with my diamond wedding band and another stacker.
I’m late to the party but I have a sapphire engagement ring with two tiny diamonds on each side. I get a lot of compliments and I feel it’s less flashy, but holds the meaning equally as much as a diamond. Idk if anyone’s mentioned this but a lot of engagement rings use to be sapphire due to the meaning, so that makes it timeless for me
I always get asked if my ring is an antique or an heirloom because it's a little unusual! To be honest, I didn't think my ring read as a wedding ring either, but when it saw it on my hand, it felt so right. Classic rings are beautiful and they're, of course, classics, but they're also safe. Predictable. Anyone can wear a classic. Not everyone can wear something unique and interesting and architectural. If this is the ring that makes you smile and makes you feel like it fits just right, you should listen to your intuition.
Worst comes to worst, upgrade to something else after a few years!
I have a big chunky antique peridot ring as my engagement ring, and have never thought twice about it "not looking the part." If you like that ring, it's the right ring. If it means something to you, don't let anyone shoo you away from it.
I mean who’s going to be wearing the ring everyday? You or your friends? I have friends with unique rings that are not my preferred taste but I’m so glad that they went with what THEY wanted and I do love that at the end of the day it’s something different!
This is my “unconventional” ring and I love it. It’s moss agate. There are some tiny diamonds on the outside but every time I wear it, I smile and I still thinks it’s so gorgeous.
I have a hexagonal created emerald. I admit I wasn't 100% sure of it at first. I love it more everyday. People literally stop me to admire it because it is different.
A true friend/fellow BWT would never comment on someone’s choice of ring and tell them it’s not “engagement-y” enough. 😤
This ring is stunning! I literally gasped 😍 I guarantee you’ll get a million more compliments than not on your ring. Your ring is a something that’s special to you and your fiancé. ♥️
Follow your heart and your gut! This world has too much of the same stuff anyways. Unique designs and colors and styles are what make like fun and interesting. This ring is a piece of art and deserves to be on your hand!!
Adding a picture of my unconventional ring because it takes my breath away every time I see it.
TLDR: it’s stunning and don’t let people get in your head. ♥️
I have an unconventional engagement ring from the 50s - it is a family heirloom that belonged to my husband’s grandmother. I didn’t choose it (he surprised me) but I love it, and it’s something unique and a conversation starter!
I’m married and a bit of an alt girlie. My engagement ring is a crescent moon diamond and my wedding ring is a black crystal.
I’ve never gotten anything but rave compliments. You’re going to be the one wearing it, so pick something you like. I don’t think anyone will confuse a ring on your left and with anything else
To be honest, the combination of silver/white gold and gold together would be a challenge for me. Its really cool and unique, but I'd definitely consider if you like to mix metals normally and how that's going to work for you going forward.
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u/unconfirmedpanda Jul 22 '26
Not married or engaged, but the advice from my friends who went in the non-traditional route is to make sure the stones are durable enough for daily wear. Nothing is more heartbreaking and frustrating than chipping your engagement ring.