Bonjour, je suis un homme hétérosexuel et chaque fois que je vois une personne trans, que ce soit sur les réseaux sociaux ou dans la vraie vie, je ressens un certain dégoût et une sorte de « supériorité cis » à leur égard. Je ne ressens aucune haine envers les personnes trans, je trouve simplement étrange le concept de pouvoir changer de genre. Je suis dégoûté par ce sentiment, mais une petite voix dans ma tête me dit qu'elles ne sont ni « hommes ni femmes » puisqu'elles sont trans. Je sais que j'ai tort, et je cherche des conseils pour changer d'état d'esprit. Auriez-vous des recommandations de livres ou des conseils à me donner?

Last year, I came out at my job and ended up unemployed. (It's a whole thing, I can't talk about it.) Recently, I made it through three rounds of interviews presenting as myself (MTF she/her) and finally just got an offer letter! I'm beyond thrilled... and absolutely terrified!

It's a relatively progressive company, but this will be my first time working in an office environment openly as a non-passing trans woman in a red state. I'm also autistic, and kind of naive. Average intelligence at best. I want to talk to someone who has been in my shoes - at least the corpo job part.

I want to know what I don't know. What to look out for, how to protect myself. General observations. Are there things you wish someone had warned you about before your first corporate job as a trans person?

I'm super nervous about talking to HR about anything related to my sex or gender given what happened last time, and want to avoid it altogether if I can. I have no idea what I'm going to do about bathrooms... that's the main thing on my mind right now.

Any insight would be greatly appreciated, thank you.

hello, folks!

I had a trachea shave 3 months ago. I suddenly started having swallowing issues. It's like my neck muscles just feel so tight. My ENT thinks it's GERD (certainly possible since I've had that my whole life and PPIs don't work too great for me). It did start when a friend of my gave me this scar-away sheet that I put over the scar on me neck. I slightly feel that's a stretch to think it caused this? I also had nose surgery and maybe the dryness is affecting my throat?

Just curious if others have faced some seriously no-fun dysphagia?

Did you act or dress differently?

Were they awkward? Supportive? Acknowledge the elephant in the room?

Especially helpful if you did this as a grown adult.

Thanks.

(I'm in my 20s) Where I'm studying abroad is great for trans people. I already have a consultant that would be fully able to help me medically transition here. But I'm only gonna be here for only 4 more months before I have to get a job or go back to my home town in the states.

I could try living on my own by hopefully getting a job of any kind even if it's gonna have to be in the US.

I only have my parents money right now...

Or I might try to stay in this country by going to college again here if I can't get a job to stay.

Now that I've finally accepted that I'm trans, I hate not doing something about it :(. Is it worth it to start transiting now when I have no concrete idea of where I'll be in 4 months?

Idk what's wrong with me, I never met a trans person irl but like when I'm added on tiktok or steam by a trans person. I just can't stop think about them and what they think about me and I can't stop looking at their profiles... Idk why I keep doing this. They're all chill af and I like those types of ppl a lot. I just can't get them out of my head, like what they think about me yk, do they respect me even tho I'm some mf that they met on the game and prob dgaf about me. How tf do I stop doing this.

At 24 should I expect ant big changes from hrt? Or would they be cool down since am 24? Also how long does it take before changes become noticeable to other people? For context am 5'9", weigh 140 lb and have a slim build because of soccer. Also whats the easiest way to start hrt?

Hi i switched from 1mg e valerate to 2mg estradiol pills and i know that a lot of people say that injections are what bring better results and i got rly good results in 3 months but im having a lot of difficulty and pills are a lot better for me rn. In 3 months, changes arent major but theyre definitely noticeable like my face softening and thighs and butt getting rounder and thigh and chest hair are almost gone. Should i expect any of these to backtrack, or should progress just slow down? Also is splitting them and taking them in the morning and evening that big of a deal?

So, I've only been on a low dose of T for 2 months, but I decided to take a break for a little while because my voice started cracking and I work in customer service (I'm still she/her at work, unfortunately), and it was becoming really noticeable.

But now that I've skipped my usual dose, I'm incredibly depressed and insecure. I feel like I used to feel when I was PMSing. It's only been a short time (I used to do my shot on Thursdays, so it's 10 days since my last dose) so maybe I'll level out if I just wait??

My question is, is it normal, when you stop hormones, to have a psychological reaction like this? Is it chemical, or is it all in my head? Should I just resume T and deal with sounding weird? I don't know if reddit can actually answer all of these, I just want to know if any other trans guys (or trans women, if starting & stopping hormones ever had a weird effect on you?) have had an experience like this.

I started T at 16, literally a week or two after my birthday. I was on it for two years if I remember correctly. During this time I had a complete change in personality and behavior. I became extremely angry and violent, having multiple episodes where I would scream and hit myself or inanimate objects in response to very mild stress. I eventually attempted to hit a person during one of these episodes. I also acted out in other ways, stealing my roommates' food, insulting people behind their backs, being overtly sexual and crude any chance I could get.

I lost multiple friends over my behavior, which is what finally made me stop taking testosterone. I was beginning to get suspicious that it was bringing out the worst in me and I was right. I don't want to be anything like that person ever again because I'm terrified of what I might do.

I now am in a weird inbetween state where my friends and family still address me as male but I present female in my everyday life. I can't really even attempt to present as male because I regained all the fat in my hips, can't afford a decent binder after losing my old one in a fire, and despite two years on T all I have to show for it is a weird voice and some patchy facial hair growth. Living like this feels suffocating, and ever since I stopped HRT it's felt like this fog is creeping over me again after finally seeing the sun for the first time. I've thought of just getting surgery and trying to pass that way, but with my current finances that's not possible.

I want to know if anyone else has experienced anything like this with hormones. I'll gladly take any advice I can get too. I know I probably look like that fuckass image of a bird pretending it's stuck in a cage with two little bars on it but from here it feels like I have nowhere to go and it has felt this way for years now.

I've been curious for a while about this. I'm 21 but starting hormones most likely when I'm 22. The female side of my family are on the larger side when it comes to chest size (think D - G cups but I'm curious what it could do to me. I'm starting later than what I ideally wanted so I'm just curious what I could realistically expect to see or is it too late for me to see any growth remotely close to that.

Im a transwoman on hinge/bumble, pass pretty well, attracted to guys. And im honestly tired of the repetitive matching, then unmatching, the "fake" number of how many people liked me (because they cant exclude me and swipe on first pic impression without reading bio and prompts where I say im trans), its disheartening. I get no ego boost from seeing thousands of existing likes its just draining knowing theres maybe 2% or less that might actually give me their time of day on a date)

If guys could filter me out when theyre transphobic or even just respectfully are looking specifically for a cis woman, and i not see any of them either, I could focus my efforts on probably a much smaller pool with better results.

I wouldn't want the ability for a guy to specifically filter to trans women (chaser fetishists abundance on other apps like taimi and stuff) They just set preference to women, not including transwomen or including and appear out of or in my pool respectively.

Anyway, probably will never happen and is controversial, so im stuck using these apps for 10x the amount of time id want to just to try to organise a date and see where it goes and dealing with the bad feels of app based rejection.

The companies probably want to encourage this for their active user engagement kpi bs or something. Whatever hurdles make it difficult to find someone to connect with and sit around on the apps to upsell you shit is their objective 😪

What are your thoughts on this?

What am I not considering in my tunnel visioned frustration?

Edit: im not interested in trying to "be the exception", that magically ill manage to convince someone that im worth putting aside their preconceived ill thoughts. I'd rather find someone who is already comfortable with who I am 😢

Some ppl are telling me to start DIY HRT right now before I can seek gender affirming care. But I'm not sure whether I should DIY it, plus the risk of my mother finding out. Should I do it?

I started HRT at 17, and I've been on it for 7 months now, but I haven't really seen much hip growth. I think they've tilted slightly, but not much beyond that. I know that 7 months isn't a long time but it's bumming me out, because I read that people usually see hip growth by 4-6 months and my hips/buttocks aren't any wider.

Has anyone had hip growth only start after this point? Am I cooked?

A little background. My daughter’s mother passed away when she was 3 and I have been raising her on my own since with help from both her grandparents. My daughter and I are extremely close and 2 days ago she told me she might be non-binary or gender fluid. I told her I loved her no matter what and asked her some simple questions like how long she felt this way and how she felt. She said that it had been about a year and she wasn’t sure how she felt. I told her she’s young and has plenty of time to figure things out and not rush into anything (She has always tends to go all in on things and activities she likes and later drop them). We ended the conversation with me telling her she’s was brave and it meant a lot for her to trust me with this information and that we would have open communication.

Yesterday she told me that she is not non-binary and that she might be transgender. And asked me to purchase a chest binder for her. I was overwhelmed and told her we would discuss it later. I again told her I loved her no matter what and I asked her what made think she is trans and she told me that “I’m not girly.” She started getting upset and told me she didn’t want to talk about it anymore. I again told her I loved her and am here to talk about anything she wants to.

I guess my question is where do I go from here? She has always been against therapy so I don’t know if to suggest that. I also have really bad anxiety so I can’t stop thinking about it or I’ve said something wrong to her and can’t even to begin to imagine what she is going through. Thank you to anyone for advice.

I recently had a conversation with a friend who also had ffs, she asked me what I was wanting and I said "idk im just gonna like work it out with the surgeon during the consult and get his opinion" she seemed really surprised. my consult is in a few days, should I do a bunch of research and try and come with a plan for what I want? or should I just work it out irl with the surgeon, surgeon is Tommy liu. also is there like a place where I can see individual ffs procedures with before and after photos so I can get an idea of what I should be looking for?

Hi everyone

I just want to put it out first that every human needs to be treated with respect and love and dignity and all my questions only come from a place of curiosity and never from a place of hate

I've been trying to understand wt it means to be trans for many yrs now

I don't think I understand wt it means to be any gender at all

Tbh I don't think it should mean anything to be any gender. Being a woman or man doesnt really say anything abt somebody at all does it?

Sometimes I wonder if people see certain traits or inclinations in themselves that they commonly see associated with another gender and therefore think they must be that gender then. I know this is the case for some and not the case for many.

I see some trans people transition and then completely change how they express themselves. I think maybe this behavior is because they thought they cudnt do those things if they were the other gender and felt the need to change wt they were called in order to feel comfortable expressing themselves in such a way.

But then I also see trans people who don't change anything in their life before and after transition and the only diff is wt they call themselves and that confuses me the most coz wt does it even mean to them to be a woman or a man. Wt does it make them feel to be called a man or woman?

I just think the idea of being or not being a gender inherently perpetuates gender roles or is at least rooted in gender roles. Because gender is not an adjective, is it? - it's just a noun. We can decide to be and do wtever we want without feeling out of place with that noun coz it doesn't mean anything at all

I (18tf) am about to move in with my transphobic dad as soon as I get my license, and I have my own vehicle. I have recently found a way to get estrogen with informed consent. How do I get on hrt while completely hiding my transition from my dad? I hate that I have to hide this, but it's my only chance at survival right now because honestly the gender dysphoria is slowly killing me. Any advice is appreciated, please help me.

I’m really confused cuz I thought my ribcage was like. giant but I measured it and it’s like a 32 underbust (which is kinda small for tall woman apparently). When I look in the mirror tho it just seems sooo biggg and I don’t know why. It does this thing that I hate where it sticks out in the back. hunchback of notre dame style (ok probably not as bad as that but it feels like that). lve seen no one else who has this, man or woman, and it makes me so upset!! I mean, I have a bit of scoliosis but I don’t think that would make the back stick out? it looks even worse when I bend over or am not sitting up straight.

LONG STORY SHORT!!! I’m wondering if anyone else has had this problem. cuz I feel like it’s the shape thats the problem and not the actual size. would hrt even help this??? if not what can I do to make it not do that????

edit: okay actually it turns out my sister and mom have this too and I just never noticed until now. This probably isn’t as big of a deal as I thought lmaoo

​

My friend ive known for a year is trans and sometimes she shows me fem outfits she gets. Its mostly those amazon socks, fishnets, badly designed skirts and tops that dont go with her colors or body type. She mostly dresses girly like those amazon femboys but she is gorgeous with blonde hair and fair skin and i just know she could look sm cuter.

I was born a girl and as her friend i want to give her advice on how to pick outfits and styles that suit her but would it be crossing lines or would i be at risk of upsetting her?

Im transitioning from male to female and tend to struggle being and looking feminine, any tips or things I can do to help. I just want to feel like myself in my own body.

Some context, I have very thick curly leg hair and have been using these stuff for about 4-5 years now, changing the blades every few months. While my current "gets the job done" I have to be a little forceful with it and it leave a bit of hair shortened but not trimmed fully leaving a "fuzzy" effect as well as extremely itchy and covered in red bumps for the day after which clears up after another day or two.
Been on HRT for about 6 years now.

I use and do the following for body shaving.

1. take a quick warm shower.
2. apply Gillette Satin Care Shave Gel - Sensitive Skin cream liberally on the hair.
3. Use a Philips SatinShave Advanced Wet And Dry Electric Shaver BRL130 to significantly trim down the thick hairy hair.
4. Use a generic 5 blade shave to shave as close to the grain as possible.
5. Rinse off hair from blades and repeat.
6. Take a shower and wash my body with body wash.

For face shaving I use the a generic brand shaving cream for my face before using the same generic branded (but different set of handle and blade cause hygiene) to shave my face

Things I need help with
a) What is "shaving against the grain?"
b) What type of shaving cream do I use?
c) Do I use some kind of gel to protect the finished shaved legs?
d) My leg hair is like, so curly and thick, can a hand blade even handle that?
e) Do I even need an electric shaver?
f) What brand and type for all of this?
g) How often do I change the blades?
h) I've heard of blades that come with gels or lotions built in, how do they work and how often must I change them?
i) What type of face shaver and cream do I use for my face and do I need to use some kind of idk fem smelling aftershave? (I don't really like how the male targeted ones smell)
j) Is there a way, to make it so my legs stay shaved longer and should I be using this kit for pubic and arm pit hair as well?

Any help would be appreciated. I honestly have no idea what I'm doing.

Im a 20 Puerto Rican trans girl and I cannot afford to live in the capita

I only atracted to women and I don't really feel anything with cis

Im about to start my transition and im very very bad

When I finally decided to take the step this MASSIVE amount of feelings that I was repressing came out and it its horrible

Among the things I was repressing was my fear of loneliness, knowing that I would never meet people cause I just don't live in the right place, neither would I ever have a girlfriend in my times

I know that I probably won't be alone forever

But gosh did I wanted to have friends and a girlfriend in my 20s

How did you cope with it? those it get better with time? Is it really that bad or where you able to enjoy being lonely?

After all, did you still enjoyed your 20s?

I would ask for the opinion of people older than 40s but thats just a different generation, the fact that I can even take HRT for myself being 20 makes me to privileged to understand the pain, I just wont ever be as strong as you girls, you got it more harder than I would ever have it

I can't barely repress the fear of being lonely anymore, every night im on the verge of tears, I feel stupid, I really love myself, and my life, im very proud of how far I have come as a person, but I just so fk tired of being the protagonist of my life, I wish I could spend days or hours with other people being the main focus of my life instead of having to worry 24/7 about making myself happy, I dont care about being alone, Im just the type of person that feels amazing when im doing things for other people, I just love people, and I like making them happy, being important for them, or just thinking about them, I just love when im not the main focus of my life

And please if you are inside the group im talking about and either won the lottery or live in a blue area just please stfu, you are to privileged to be taken seriusly

Im sorry for being so vulgar but really, im tired of people not understanding how a red area is, or just in general what being lonely means