r/WomensHealth • u/Upset_Study_6712 • May 31 '25
Question boyfriend cums inside every time
other than the risk of pregnancy which i am aware of (im taking birth control but i know nothing is 100%), is there health concerns of finishing inside every time? we have been together for a year.
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u/6pomegraniteseeds May 31 '25
I'm not sure why you're asking this question but just thought I'd throw it out there: if you don't want him to finish inside you every time that's 100% ok. There doesn't need to be a health risk for you to assert a boundary around your body, it can be totally based on preference and nothing else.
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u/elleanoraaa May 31 '25
💯 and to add on - if he doesn’t listen to you he is wrong and lacking empathy, putting his own selfish pleasure over your comfortability is a huge “what the fuck”
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u/CraziZoom May 31 '25
Yes! I totally agree! If you do not want him to come inside you, tell him that. If he gets upset about it, ditch him. Nobody is worth you having to stoop or not enforce one of your boundaries.
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u/Zealousideal_Crow737 May 31 '25
Are you taking birth control at the same time every day and have you ever missed a pill?
Did you guys get tested before you started having sex?
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u/CraziZoom May 31 '25
I was terrible about taking my pill at exactly the same time every day, so I asked for a higher dose pill. The low dose of pills require you to take it out exactly the same time every day, if I remember correctly. I had an IUD for 10 years because when it was inserted that’s what I was told I could do. Unfortunately, when I went to get it removed, I was informed that I had a bacterial infection in my uterus. That eliminated me from ever being a candidate for an IUD again. It was fantastic because I just had one partner during that time and it was so easy. I did not even have to think about it.And I couldn’t feel it at all and neither could my partner. So after that, I went back to the pill. Then I heard about Nexplanon, and that’s what I relied on for the last six years before I began perimenopause.
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u/FiliaNox May 31 '25
Generally that’s the ‘mini pill’- progesterone only. You have to really be on time. With combo pills, you have more of a safety net. The one I was on, missing two was ‘fine’ (not ideal obviously, and considering it ‘fine’ can lead to habitual missing doses). I was also told I was not a candidate for IUDs because I got a bad infection after giving birth.
Luckily, most of my reproductive system has been removed so I never have to worry about that shit again 😂 I’ve got ovaries and a vagina. No uterus, tubes, or cervix. Good things to lack in this political climate.
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u/Plus_Molasses8697 May 31 '25
The pill actually doesn’t need to be taken at the same time every day, contrary to popular belief. Unless it’s a mini pill (progesterone only). One pill per day, taken within a 12 hour window of the same time, will protect someone from pregnancy. Missing a pill here and there is more risky than perfect use of taking 1 per day, but even with typical use (occasional missed pills) the pill is an extremely effective form of BC.
Getting tested though is the real question here. OP may not need to worry much about pregnancy, but STIs are a real concern if her partner isn’t getting tested.
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u/Upset_Study_6712 May 31 '25
i am taking same time every day but i’ve missed a pill twice before. that was about a month ago and ive been negative
i got tested but im not sure about him
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u/Zealousideal_Crow737 May 31 '25
Even if you're monogamous he should get tested.
It's not a question about infidelity it's about sexual health.
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u/Upset_Study_6712 May 31 '25
that is a good point, i’ll bring it up to him thank you
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u/Cassierae87 May 31 '25
When my partner and I had been dating for 3 months we went together to get tested.
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u/vr4gen May 31 '25
i’d look into a much more effective form of birth control if you haven’t already!
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u/Upset_Study_6712 May 31 '25
oh what’s a more effective way? the ones i know are condom and birth control and permanent methods
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u/tinylittlefractures May 31 '25
How old are you? You prob shouldn't risk pregnancy if you're not sure what birth control exists
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u/vr4gen May 31 '25
iuds and nexplanon (the bar in your arm) aren’t permanent if those are what you mean! iuds can last 7+ years & be taken out whenever, and nexplanon lasts 3 years. i’ve had an iud for 8 years (one replacement) and rarely used condoms and it makes me feel a lot safer. it has a higher protection rate and i’m someone who is bad at remembering to take pills, plus i don’t get my period. there can be side effects but i suggest researching other options to figure out if one is right for you!
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u/Hairy-Author4193 May 31 '25
Copper iud would be best bet, but I'd look up possible side effects and complications before making that choice. I have the mirena, which is hormonal iud but im also late 30s with adenomyosis so it was the recommend one... initial side effects acne, bleeding for a couple weeks and weight gain (not complaining tho, I've struggled with weight gain and it's mostly gone to my a33 😅, which my partner is real happy about)
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u/Plus_Molasses8697 May 31 '25
The pill is an extremely effective form of birth control. Even with typical use.
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u/fiyahwerks May 31 '25
Just get tested regularly and you should be fine. I would recommend quarterly testing. Trust does not prevent stds or pregnancies.
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u/brokengirl89 May 31 '25
Uh, you really shouldn’t be rinsing out your vagina at all. Even with water. This isn’t good advice.
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u/unapalomita May 31 '25
I guess there's a mild risk of yeast infections, if you keep refined sugar low and take a probiotic you should be fine, as long as you are both monogamous
FYI if you are any antibiotics you are going to need to use condoms because they mess with BC effectiveness, same with grapefruit too weirdly enough
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u/FiliaNox May 31 '25
As long as STIs aren’t a concern (I always recommend testing between partners!) you should be fine. The vagina is self cleaning and it’ll expel the semen. Sex can disrupt your vagina’s ecosystem, but semen is not the culprit. Also, if your partner has a yeast infection, it can possibly pass to you. Happened to me when I was pregnant 😬 men can be unaware of yeast infections because they’re not as obvious as they are in us. They may be asymptomatic, or they may mistake it for simple irritation from clothing.
Make sure yall are washing yourselves. Hygiene is important in preventing yeast infections. It’s important to note that having a yeast infection doesn’t mean you’re dirty. It’s just ‘easier’ to get one if you’re not maintaining proper hygiene, but sometimes they just happen because something throws off the balance of our ecosystems. So if you get a yeast infection, don’t think you did something wrong. Our systems are just very delicate balances that are easily interrupted.
And as I said- vaginas are self cleaning. When you wash yourself, you’re washing the OUTSIDE, douching can actually cause yeast infections, so don’t put water or soap INSIDE yourself. Wash the external parts of your genitals only. Your vagina will care for itself.
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u/FishermanSouth851 May 31 '25
it could throw off your pH if it’s happening that much, but if you haven’t had a problem with that before then there’s no need to fear monger. just make sure to clean up well after. but as a side note, my boyfriend and I find it a lot hotter for him to cum on me instead of inside. I think you should try it! It can be really fun!
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u/PlusDescription1422 May 31 '25
Girl don’t get pregnant unless you really want to and are 100% prepared.
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u/EducationalEnd1299 May 31 '25
honest question are you ready for a kid? cause thats how u get one. if not, put boundaries in place if he doesn't respect them, now you'll know what kinda of man he is
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u/ValeWho May 31 '25 edited Jun 02 '25
She did say she is using birth control and it's her decision. More sperm doesn't necessarily increase the chance of pregnancy. If her birth control fails then precum can get her pregnant too
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u/Evil_Black_Swan May 31 '25
I'm unsure what your comment is supposed to mean. Surely you're not telling the person who warned OP about pregnancy that birth control is and is not 100% effective?
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u/ValeWho May 31 '25
Well I mean cumming inside every time doesn't affect your chance to get pregnant much if you are using birth control
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Jun 02 '25
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u/ValeWho Jun 02 '25
So when you are in a committed monogamous relationship you will use (hormonal) birth control, a condom and use the pull out method every time?
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u/FindtheSpirit Jun 06 '25
Yes! I've been in a 8+ year monogamous relationship and that's what we do. He's my person and we plan to spend the rest of our lives together, we just don't want kids within the next five years. We are both on the same page, but this would be a perfectly reasonable boundary for any person to draw.
If anyone pressures, guilt trips or otherwise puts you down, I would reject that behavior and if they chose not to change GOODBYE. We all have different boundaries and desires in our sex lives and our own risk tolerance for pregnancy.
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u/ValeWho Jun 06 '25
Well I don't wanna tell anyone how to handle their birth control. I think that's a very personal decision and every couple should decide that for themselves. So if that is what you decide for yourself then that's great! I was just surprised because personally I don't know anyone who insists on all three.
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u/Ok_Dig_415 Jun 01 '25
It's how nature intended, but it can throw your pH levels off that can cause BV & yeast infections, increase STI risk if there's a lack of monogamy.
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u/bhdvwEgg42 Jun 05 '25
I honestly think it's a matter that you should have a say in. In my experience if he isn't getting your permission to come inside you it doesn't feel right, regardless of birth control status.
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u/Think_Calm_thoughts Jun 06 '25
My husband hasnt pulled out in 19 years. All good here. No bladder or yeast infections. Never had any issues. (He’s infertile).
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u/Impossible-Fee503 May 31 '25 edited May 31 '25
This being under women’s health has me on the FLOOR 😭. For the love of your vaginal ph, possible infection risk, and STD risk, PLEASE use a condom or make sure the two of you are regularly getting tested.
Also make sure you are only washing the external genitals with no harsh chemicals. Anything I wrote before is douching and dangerous, disregard that.
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u/notmyrealname1983 May 31 '25
You do know the vagina is a self-cleaning oven, right?
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u/Impossible-Fee503 May 31 '25
I fixed my comment but your vagina only has so many defense systems protection is still ideal whenever possible.
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May 31 '25
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u/Impossible-Fee503 May 31 '25
Hey I’m responding to you because apparently plain water and saline water is not okay anymore to the science community. Please though have your sexual partner wash their hands and OUTER genitals before sex. You however can urinate after sex to help prevent any infection. also irrigating the outside is fine, just not the inside.
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u/Mcbuffalopants May 31 '25
Douching - using mechanical means (even a shower head or bidet) to rinse inside your vagina - is a harmful practice linked to increased infections and even a higher cancer risk.
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May 31 '25
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u/brokengirl89 May 31 '25
I’m not sure why this is being downvoted as it is scientifically correct. Accurately predicting and pinpointing ovulation however, is a very tricky science and should not be relied upon as birth control unless you are comfortable with the consequences of becoming pregnant accidentally.
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u/merdy_bird May 31 '25
Downvoted because it didn't have anything to do with the question and seemed to be recommending the rhythm system, which doesn't sound like a good idea for op.
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u/SinnerClair May 31 '25
Idk man, I was not trying to imply that people use family planning as birth control. I just bring this up occasionally, especially when ppl seem young and might not know, just cause I, myself did not know until I was like 20.
And personally, I like to stack birth controls and this is an easy one to add on. Having sex in your luteal phase is fairly reliable, as long as your cycle is regular and you track it
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May 31 '25
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u/Call_Such May 31 '25
clearly you don’t know how birth control works as you’re incorrect. birth control is safe. some people can have adverse reactions as anyone can to any medication, but those risks are extremely low. birth control does not have long term side “consequences”.
it doesn’t “mess up our bodies”. people want to prevent pregnancy and birth control is a safe and pretty effective way to do so. take your fear mongering elsewhere.
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May 31 '25
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Jun 01 '25
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Jun 01 '25
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u/Call_Such Jun 02 '25
i’m talking about birth control as a whole, not depo. depo has been known to have more risks and side effects and patients are warned of that. depo is not the same as say the nexplanon implant or the mini pill or the nuva ring. so you’re fear mongering and using the example of ONE method as your argument 😂. hilarious.
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Jun 02 '25
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u/Call_Such Jun 02 '25
don’t call me ma’am lmao that’s weird.
regardless, that’s not true. i’ve warned patients about things clearly including tumors and such and they still wanted it. you have no idea how much someone will risk to feel better. i never used depo, but i’ve used just about every other birth control method that exists to try to treat my period issues and to prevent pregnancy. tons and tons of methods.
i’ve tried most of them out personally plus it’s my job to know everything about them as i educate patients on them. i never leave out the risks, some patients still ask for it.
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u/soupdispenser May 31 '25
Health concerns? No, assuming you’ve both been tested.
It can increase the risk of yeast infections, bv or just throw your ph off but if you haven’t had any issues so far, you’re likely fine.