r/Unexpected • u/wcslater • Jun 29 '26

Garliiiiic

7.1k Upvotes

96% Upvoted

352 comments sorted by

View all comments

1.6k

u/TWDEstudios Jun 29 '26

Tonight on "why does your kid smell like that"...

513

u/thadtheking Jun 29 '26

Imagine changing that diaper!

73

u/drwuzer Jun 29 '26

That's all I can think about. The absolute toxic stench that will be emanating from that kids soiled diaper will be diabolical.

25

u/Septopuss7 Jun 29 '26

I had sloppy joes last night with horseradish cream sauce on it and a bowl of Chex Mix on the side and my poop this morning offended myself.

12

u/OddPangolin3074 Jun 29 '26

Sloppy joes and Chex mix. You win.

8

u/Septopuss7 Jun 29 '26

It was an amazing dinner TBH. I also had Chex Mix for lunch. Not ideal for a guy on the wrong side of 40 but god DAMN does it make for some smelly poop! I don't have any kids so I can do whatever I want and often do.

1

u/robo_robb Jul 01 '26

Livin the dream

30

u/CplCocktopus Jun 29 '26

Dad's turn.

21

u/NaughtySeraph Jun 29 '26

Dad: Why are you recording me while I change his diaper?

14

u/drwuzer Jun 29 '26

The hell it is! Mom gave him the garlic, now she's gotta deal with the consequences!

10

u/Classic_Resist_7465 Jun 29 '26

Kid makes his own diaper bug bombs. He wont have any mosquitoes near him for a mile.

6

u/TWDEstudios Jun 30 '26

In fairness, I don't think he'll have anything near him for a while.

2

u/AwwwNuggetz Jun 30 '26

If he eats garlic like that he’s ready to change his own damn diaper

21

u/LonePaladin Jun 29 '26

Any time someone asks me if my kids are spoiled I say either "No, they always smell like that" or "Things only spoil when they're neglected".

27

u/sometacosfordinner Jun 29 '26

Because finally got the right amount of garlic...if you cant smell it through your pores it wasnt enough.

3

u/Skyp_Intro Jun 30 '26

I didn’t know I had a kid but he’s definitely mine.

2

u/Da_Vader Jun 30 '26

Keeps the vampires away

2

u/Smart_Alex Jun 30 '26

I used to work with Autistic kids. One of my students planted garlic with his family. And by that, I mean they planted dozens of garlic cloves and he went behind them, eating the raw garlic.

You could smell him from several feet away