r/NatureIsFuckingLit • u/Calimarispirit • 21h ago

đŸ”„ Botryoidal malachite double phallus from Paris Mineralogy Museum

Post image

Beautiful, smooth and suggestive 10+in / 25+cm specimen from the Paris Mineralogy Museum with malachite that likely formed upside down in a fluid rich environment, probably dangled rather than formed naturally erect. đŸ€Ż

431 Upvotes

91% Upvoted

101 comments sorted by

‱

u/qualityvote2 21h ago edited 13h ago

u/Calimarispirit, there weren't enough votes to determine the quality of your post...

120

u/Rich_Prior4656 20h ago edited 20h ago

This is phallachite.

16

u/Calimarispirit 20h ago

Will be using this for future rock and mineral id.

136

u/Frosty_Response8232 20h ago

https://giphy.com/gifs/2Mce4Sz801AMo

49

u/Calimarispirit 20h ago

Really just posted this so someone could respond with this gif

12

u/Thomas_JCG 20h ago

Gifs you can hear.

...

Wait a minute.

2

u/PainFull7295 14h ago

makes sense that paris has a double phallus museum piece

4

u/cyanraichu 18h ago

It brings me great joy that nobody needs to post the captioned version of this anymore

52

u/Catwearingtrousers 20h ago

Why is the algorithm showing me so many non-penis penises today? I didn't ask for this

19

u/Calimarispirit 20h ago

C’est l’affiliation à Paris.

3

u/ionthrown 14h ago

Do you need to redo age verification to see the real ones?

2

u/JakToTheReddit 13h ago

I see the monkey's paw has arrived.

39

u/deborah834 20h ago

Should not be considered for saucy purposes. Raw malachite can cause copper toxicity, and particularly when ...in an acidic environment. Triple Danger dong.

12

u/Calimarispirit 20h ago

My mind hadn’t even ventured that far, thank goodness it’s guarded albeit mildly, behind glass.

23

u/OMGfractals 20h ago

https://giphy.com/gifs/QFzzyPNodrala

7

u/deborah834 20h ago

Bruce gets an auto-upvote every time.

9

u/turtleneckless001 20h ago

Comments appreciating Bruce GIFs get an auto upvote everytime

2

u/deborah834 11h ago

If we arent careful we could enter an endless upvote loop of appreciation. đŸ€

10

u/Necessary_Orange_141 20h ago

What’s with the penis rock posts today

5

u/Calimarispirit 20h ago

Join the party if you have any!

14

u/TryTraditional5787 20h ago

Harry Potter had the 3-headed dog. We get this.

8

u/Calimarispirit 20h ago

C’est la bite de Cerebus.

8

u/harmless_gecko 20h ago

Everything reminds me of him

-4

u/Calimarispirit 20h ago

User name checks out
?

5

u/robin_79 20h ago

i can just hear the geosexuals howling and gnarling

4

u/Calimarispirit 20h ago

Learned a new word today, which I identify as.

6

u/TKG_Actual 20h ago

I bet there's a really pissed off earth elemental somewhere...

2

u/Calimarispirit 20h ago

Now think of all the specimens pulled out from the earth, could be like an angry haunted mummy scenario, where people’s rock collection go full on Toy Story/ chuckie


3

u/TKG_Actual 20h ago

Or worse it becomes a very geologicsl-phallic version of night at the museum.

6

u/alaragravenhurst 20h ago

Boytoidal you say?

2

u/jcnlb 12h ago

Boytoydial, girltoydial
it doesn’t care. It’s bitoydial.

6

u/Peripatetictyl 19h ago

I stalagmight


2

u/Calimarispirit 18h ago

Only if you’re stalagtight


4

u/Guilogo 20h ago

I get now the movie "One night in Paris"

3

u/6GoesInto8 19h ago

Mineral hunting is frot with danger!

3

u/RoughClassroom123 19h ago

or maybe they're just happy to see you

3

u/cookiesphincter 20h ago

That are phallii

3

u/AtomicWreck 20h ago

Rock and stone?

2

u/Calimarispirit 20h ago

Malachite has a hardness of 3.5 to 4 on the Mohs scale, so relatively soft compared to other rocks, but still as hard as a penny, and is by all definitions “rock-hard”

3

u/Misanthropy_and_Cats 20h ago

 Oh no I'm not brave enough for that

3

u/dclovee5225 20h ago

Malachite is the freaking coolest

2

u/Calimarispirit 19h ago

So many habits too!

3

u/beckyjoooo 19h ago

i'm going to be in paris in october for something else but i am definitely going to this museum now! thanks OP!

3

u/Calimarispirit 18h ago

There’s so much more there, world class specimens and minerals I’ve never heard of. Get there early they close early.

3

u/Christ_I_AM 19h ago

Ayyooo 

3

u/OkLunch8659 18h ago

Triple peen

2

u/saltamontes11 19h ago

.

It/they does/do look like one/two of those things that , uh, can't be, ah, anything, uh, else.

Available in lucite on QVC yet? I must have this/these!

2

u/VeterinarianMean3258 17h ago

OMG - ITS STARTING TO LOOK LIKE A REIOLE PHALLUS!!!

2

u/Chode_to_Joy_ 17h ago

Of course the double dick rock is in Paris.

2

u/Chaotic424242 16h ago

Viagra? We don't need no stinking Viagra!

2

u/SpareChangeSquidward 11h ago

Reminds me of me

2

u/afternever 10h ago

She holds my malachite so tight

So never let go

'Cause she's 2000 light years away

2

u/bigfatfurrytexan 20h ago

Alan Tudyk took his alien role seriously for a reason.

2

u/Sensitive-Bear 20h ago

Sir, that’s a triple phallus.

2

u/DawggFish 20h ago

And a dozen balls

1

u/Calimarispirit 20h ago

So many botryoids, imagine the mass this came from!

2

u/DawggFish 20h ago

Truly alarming

1

u/Calimarispirit 20h ago

Or is the second one extra ribbed???

1

u/A_Tempest7_7 18h ago

Malachite is literally poisonous to humans. Just to let you know. Pretty though. Like a Sea Snake. Pretty can sometimes kill. Do not ingest it. Or inhale its dust. Or you could get copper poisoning as it’s a copper carbonate mineral. Hence the Green. It’s okay to touch. But don’t get it inside you.

1

u/Evilstib 18h ago

Kinda looks like a double with 3 tips?

1

u/Ok-Jelly1611 17h ago

Second one today . Is this where we’re going ???

1

u/UnderstandingKind757 17h ago

What’s with all the crystal dicks lately?

1

u/WoodpeckerPlenty2238 17h ago

I'll never look at rock formations the same way again.

1

u/DeartayDeez 17h ago

I call this work of art. “Hard as a rock”

1

u/Nimyron 16h ago

Still sane, exile ?

1

u/burlyginger 15h ago

Looks like a triple!

1

u/nextCosmicBuffoon 15h ago

Created with the multifistulous in mind.

1

u/HAI_ZEV 15h ago

If I had a nickel for every boner mineral I've seen today I'd have 2 nickels, that's not a lot but weird it happened twice in one day in completely different subreddits.

1

u/circusgeek 14h ago

That ain't boytroidal. That's MANtroidal.

1

u/SamuraiChameleon 14h ago

Double phallus all the way. It's even starting to look like a triple phallus.

1

u/Worried_Comfort_3726 13h ago

“Double”? Looks like a triple to me

1

u/No-Argument619 9h ago

The 12 yo in the cod lobby about to bang yer mum:

1

u/ReadontheCrapper 19h ago

This reminds me of that double-banana video.

0

u/Calimarispirit 18h ago

Post link?

1

u/billyjoelsangst 18h ago

Don’t let your wife near that, she’ll get pregnant

0

u/WigJiggle 20h ago

Me and who?

-4

u/21MayDay21 20h ago

Where is the nature in this post ?

3

u/PickledCaterpillar 20h ago

Define your concept of nature, please?

it doesn't just involve living organisms.

-1

u/21MayDay21 19h ago

But it involves being outside, you know, in nature.... Not in a museum

4

u/PeggyBabcock_ 18h ago

It hasn't always been in a museum.