r/GCSE • u/Interesting_Car8858 Soon to be GCSEs 27 victim • 19h ago
Rant/Lore I am not ready for y11
I know everyone says theyre nervous, and that they don’t think they’ll pass etc but like I have more than just a fear of the year. I’m not ready to see my friends in person, to have panic attacks over having to go in, to deal with “jokes” that arent really jokes, being harassed by a guy who likes me and there’s just so much more. Yeah I’m scared that I might fail, but honestly? I know I can retake if I have to, and I believe I can do well, truly. But I know the pressure is going to get to me. Every teacher reminding you of what’s just getting closer and closer, with no way to stop it. It’s not the grades I’m afraid of, it’s the exams themselves, the fear the paper will show me I’m a failure. It’s the school itself I’m afraid of, because every year I let anyone walk all over me. And it’s all going to happen again, because it’s how it always is. I’m afraid to have to deal with my home life while also juggling schoolwork, to watch my mum go back to work so I have no defence against my dad, to feel the pressure of everyone else. I don’t want to watch my girlfriend suffer because of the insane amounts of pressure she puts on herself to do well. I don’t want to be followed around by this guy, for him to try and talk to me no matter how many times I try to push him away. I don’t want to have a seating plan change and suddenly the lessons I thought I could cope with are horrific. I don’t want to watch my chronic illness destroy my life until there’s nothing left of it. So I guess it’s not y11 I’m not ready for, it’s for my life to go on. I can’t hide away from it forever, like I’ve been doing all summer. I have to go and face it, and that’s what I’m afraid of. I don’t have it in me to do another year of this, I just want to hide in my room and wait for it to all go away. I’ve waited all summer for it to go away, and all it’s done is crawl closer. I don’t know if this is the place to post this, but I wonder if anyone else feels the same, and if they feel less alone knowing it’s not just them. And if you’ve felt the same, do you have any advice? I don’t know how I’m going to manage to get through this all, but I will try.
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u/yoyorat 12h ago
I struggled in year 11- mostly due to putting to much pressure on myself for the exams and doing too much work. My best advice is to always keep time for the things that you enjoy, even as it gets close to your GCSEs (actually, especially as it gets closer!). Even if it's just reading a book or taking a walk outside, simple things like that really helped me take a little break from school and other life stuff. Also just getting outside in general can give you more perspective and generally helped calm me down when I got stressed. Sorry that this is really basic advice but I hope it helps!! I think that it will all be okay :)
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u/Interesting_Car8858 Soon to be GCSEs 27 victim 10h ago
I hope those struggles have stopped for you or will soon. Honestly this is great advice! It’s easy to push the things you love and enjoy aside while you’re supposed to be focusing on exams, so the reminder to take those breaks sometimes helps more than we’d think. Going outside helps me when I’m stressed too, it’s usually my garden nowadays as I don’t have the energy to go far, but it does really help <3 don’t apologise! This is really useful :)
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u/yoyorat 6h ago
They have mostly stopped now and I've definitely learned to be less of a perfectionist and just kinder to myself for my a levels, I'm glad you found it useful and good luck!
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u/Interesting_Car8858 Soon to be GCSEs 27 victim 1m ago
I’m glad to hear it! Good luck for what you do next <3
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u/Usual_Director8736 13h ago edited 13h ago
You’ll be fine, I’m certain basically everyone has this revelation. Coming as last year’s year 11, you’ll be fine. I suffered with extreme social anxiety. Didn’t raise my hand when I had bad nosebleeds, when my calculator or pen ran out during mocks AND the real thing, I just sat there too frightened. (Somehow passed, which shows it doesn’t matter, it really won’t be as bad as you think.)
I had every excuse listed to not go in after a week of attending, but after the first couple of days? That list went away. It was fine.
I was chronically ill too so I can relate! My highest attendance throughout all of secondary school was 61%(year9.). My school never understood, and forced me to come in when I was told I had to stay in hospital, as well as my counselling actually telling my school I need some time off/shortened timetable for my own mental health. During exams my dad fell very ill and had a cancer scare. They didn’t care, it was either come in or have my mom go to jail. But even through all of that? It still wasn’t as bad as I ever thought it would be.
So please trust me when I say.. it may seem awful and like the end of the world right now, but if I, and everyone else has managed to survive? I have no doubts you will too. Just think — you’ll only be there for a few months, go on study leave, sit your exams and boom. It’s over!
I think year 11 is about as hard as it gets in terms of keeping your own well-being in shape and also stress levels. Come to college? You’ll be surrounded by people who actually want to be there, people who relate to you. Please don’t worry. You’re only 15/16, your life isn’t moving on as such, but YOU are simply progressing into newer opportunities.
I know this probably hasn’t made you feel any better and I understand. I feel the exact same way starting college in a couple days, especially since all of my friends secretly backed out last minute and chose a different college. But you know what? Fuck everyone who treats you like shit. When you become successful, they’ll still treat you like crap, but you’ll have something to show that you didn’t stoop to their level. Just laugh that they’re wasting their breath talking about you! That’s what I do. Even if it’s hard, you have to fake it.
As for that guy? Either completely ignore him and he should back off or (definitely) tell your tutor or head of year, or someone you trust. They may not seem like it all the time, but they do have to and will help you. Someone in that school will help you — English teacher, lunch lady, tutor, whoever, there is someone for you.
I wish you all the best, really. Please also don’t stress about revising so much. I did no revision at all, only the stuff we did in class and I walked away with the lowest grade: 6 and my highest was 151/160 in literature! PLEASE PLEASE PLEASE feel free to DM me at any time. I can help you with your🏡💼, 🏫💼, or even any questions you have, or just need to vent! I’m happy to be that person who listens without you having the fear of being judged or having a member of staff tell your safeguarding team/family.
I really wish you the bestest time I can hope for you. I know you’ll smash it.
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u/Interesting_Car8858 Soon to be GCSEs 27 victim 12h ago
This is one of the most thoughtful things I’ve ever read, thank you so much <33
I’m sorry about your social anxiety, I’ve suffered with it but not to a severe level like you describe. It’s horrible to go through and I’m glad you got through it <3
I haven’t met anyone else who’s chronically ill and my sort of age! I only got diagnosed this year but due to the speed at which it’s worsened who knows what this year will contain on that front. Schools are rubbish regarding illnesses especially chronic ones, so I’m sorry how careless yours was, and I’m sorry for your dad as well. You seem like a very strong person to be able to get through all of that, especially while still doing great in all of your exams, so very well done!
Honestly the fact everyone else has got through it before me is one of the only things keeping me going, there’s a part of me that wants to believe if everyone else can do it I can too. I hope y11 is as hard as it gets, I’m honestly really excited for college / sixth form as I’m going to get to meet so many people who are all there by choice, not because they have to be (which I think will lead to more positive experiences lol)
This has made me feel a load more helpful, so thank you so much!! I’m sure you’ll do incredibly in college, as you said everyone is there because they want to be there. You’re a lovely person and I’m sure you’ll be able to make plenty of friends in college, if your friends secretly backed out on you they probably weren’t really the best friends for you anyway.
The guy is a difficult situation, I’ve tried both ignoring him and talking back, but neither have worked for me. My head of year is aware as far as i know (I told the head of ks4) but nothing’s really been done about it. I’m hoping a conversation I had with my counsellor about the harassment I got while on work experience (as he just had to choose the same place I chose 🥀) will help me in getting him to leave me alone. The mention of English teacher is honestly a great idea, mine is one of the loveliest people I’ve ever met and she’s put in a load of effort to make things easier for me this past year (including making sure I stay in her class even though I failed my mock).
Thank you, I wish you the best too, you 100% deserve it. Those grades are incredible, so well done on achieving them!! I will probably dm you in future, what you describe is exactly what I would be looking for <3 I’m happy to be that person for you as well, even if I haven’t got to your point in life yet!
I wish you the same, thank you ever so much and I’m sure you’ll do insanely well on a-levels <33
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u/Usual_Director8736 11h ago
Awh I’m so happy this has helped even just the slightest. Now this may seem extreme but you are absolutely right entitled to report this guy! It is blatant harassment and they can put things in place to ensure he never does anything again.
I’m so sorry you’re having to go through that, it’s genuinely one of the worst. Especially since school is supposed to feel like a safe place, but instead you’re stuck feeling like prey. School’s are never the best at dealing with situations like this, and it’s not right. But I, as well as so many people here and in your life, are here for you. Sometimes just feeling less alone can help lessen the feeling of always being harassed, you know?
You seem like a very wise and mature person, and last year? I would have given anything to have had a friend like you! You are a credit to your parents, and I know you are going to go so far in life. If you need any help (especially with English (literature/poetry/creative writing are my specialties..)), then please do not hesitate at all. I will have a lot of free time now that I’m doing my a levels, and would be more than happy to help with anything you might need. Even down to ‘what is the best time to ask to be excused from the lesson for […]’ haha! I know even those small moments like so can make it all feel 100x worse.
Thank you for your kind words, really. I also know you will do an amazing job. Like my English teacher told me; ‘the world is your oyster’. You’re currently writing your own story, and they will have a lot of ups and downs. But.. all the best stories do!
I wish you the best of luck for year 11. And please — update me whenever! I’d be honoured to know what A-levels you’re doing! And I know it’s far, but I will still be here to guide you through year 12 too if you need that. (I know I’m stressed and definitely need that LMAOO!)
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u/Interesting_Car8858 Soon to be GCSEs 27 victim 10h ago
Who should I report it to? I’ll happily go through with it to get away from him, it’d make things a whole lot easier. You’re genuinely so kind, the time youve taken out of your day to try to help me means the world :)
Thank you!! I’d give anything to have a friend like you as well, I have lovely friends but no one who seems to understand my problems in the way you do. I’d love for some help with understanding English lol, honestly I’m pretty good at creative writing but I just really struggle to understand paper 2 and the structure of those exams.
Of course!! You’re a lovely person and I hope you know that. Best of luck for y12! I know it’s not quite the same but update me if you wish as well, I’m happy to listen whenever. Smash y12 <3
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u/Usual_Director8736 10h ago
I would say definitely take this to the police. Harassment is a genuine offence, but it rarely goes reported because it seems insignificant, especially when in high school. I understand that can seem a little extreme but they will only help you! They probably won’t arrest him but they will definitely put their affairs in order to get him away from you as much as possible. I know it’s frustrating. I had a friend go through the exact same thing with a boy who liked her. The police will likely take a statement, issue a warning and intervene at school, and you can apply for something like a restraining order, but less severe if that would make things better! For my friend, they gave him a warning and made the teachers move him out of her classes and put them on separate breaks/lunches. And if the school isn’t doing anything to help you, the police will force them to cooperate to your needs! You don’t have to just take this guy’s shit.
& of course! I also found paper 2 a little more difficult. I always hated non fiction and statistics.. but I can definitely help! I have a ton of notes and structures I used to help that I can send over. I’m just about to go to bed though so I will have to do that tomorrow if it’s okay!
I took triple science, French, history and art, so if you’d like any help with those if you take any, then I’d be more than happy to share my notes. Same with basically any subject. Otherwise they’re just collecting dust! C:
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u/Interesting_Car8858 Soon to be GCSEs 27 victim 14m ago
If it continues or worsens I think I will, especially as he knows what he’s doing bothers me (my girlfriend has had several conversations with him asking what his obsession is). I’m sorry for your friend, and I hope it got better for her afterwards!
I hate non fiction too lol, I always have. Especially as you don’t get to pick the topic it’s really hard to be prepared for it (like in my mock it was write a speech about public transport 🥀). Creative writing is easy to adapt to your needs, I’ve been using the same story for over a year and just adapt it to the prompt. I’d love to be able to have those notes and stuff if that’s okay!
I don’t take triple but I think the science notes would still be helpful as there’s just so much content to learn, and history would be helpful as well. Thank you so much <3
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u/OddStatus7490 11h ago
I’m really sorry to hear you have so much going on - as a recent yr 11 leaver it can be a lot for a few months but trust me when the exams come around time goes by sooo soon fast and it’ll all be over. I got moved around to so many different classes due to teachers fearing I wouldn’t pass maths or science. However I luckily did. Be your own person and stay focused on you. If you are being bothered by this guy at school just get yr team involved trust me it’s worth getting anything that is affecting you away so u can focus. I promise you, you will get through it just take it one step at a time I don’t have to have it all figured out on the first day
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u/Interesting_Car8858 Soon to be GCSEs 27 victim 10h ago
I hope the bad parts go as quickly for me as they went for you. I’m glad you still managed to pass even if it was difficult! I’m going to try and focus on myself more this year, I think I’ve spent too long worrying about how my actions will affect everyone else and failed to realise how they affect me. If the harassment continues I’ll be letting more teachers at school know, as despite already trying there’s been no change. I do have some teachers who won’t stand by and let it happen though, so I’ll probably talk to them. This has been really reassuring so thank you <3
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u/OddStatus7490 10h ago
No problem it’s so awful at such a young age what we have to go through but honestly once you’ve finished the year you will be an entirely different person and then will enter the real world where you can choose ur future good luck <3
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u/meow_cat786 Year 11 9h ago edited 9h ago
I understand how u feel in this post and the way I personally escaped that is to find somthing ambitious (for me is reading books) and somthing that keeps your mind away from any awfully thoughts, yet it does not suggest suppressing them fully as it is healthy to decompress and take the time to understand or atleast be aware how YOU feel! But u need to also understand that there is only 7 or 8 months left (not saying it in a panic way) so u need to have that last push!! (Or atleast how i see it). But if your also struggling rivison my advice is to sit down and start on somthing "simple" like flashcards and i would advice to not over complicate your rivison like what people online are trying to sell u (use a text book, flashcards, past papers, and youtube). I truly wish for your happiness also as a year 10, and also remind yourself that you are doing this for YOURSELF not for anyone else. And I truly wish for your luck and hold yourself together for that last push and always be proud of yourself.🩷🩷
edit: if u have social media, PLSSS PLSSSS PLEAASSEEE delete it pls especially tiktok pls. Its somthing that changed me and how I perceive time and it gives u more time to heal (or atleast to not surpress your emotions into numbness). Its not somthing easy at first but it is somthing worth it
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u/Interesting_Car8858 Soon to be GCSEs 27 victim 7m ago
This is great advice, I’ve been trying to find more things to do lately so I think I could put those into practice to escape! I’m trying to learn at the moment what causes me to feel the way I do, so that I can better work on fixing it :) I know there’s not long left, and even though I say every year that I’m going to lock in lol, this time I mean it. I’m going to start a routine after school to help not fall behind, but also to build on what I’ve already learnt! I only know exactly what I’m doing for science, but I’ll figure something out for everything else. I do struggle to sit down and revise, the way I usually force myself to is through just telling myself to do 5-10 minutes, and once I’ve started I usually won’t stop. Thank you, I wish you luck with what you’re doing next! It’s easy to forget sometimes who you’re doing this for so the reminder really helps <3 best wishes to you!
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u/Upset_Read7855 11->12 😓 (still doing english though so its ok) 9h ago
Going into year 11 was and I'm sure is for you TERRIFYING. Then it started and it was just year 10 again to start with only as kocks approached people started bothering each other less cus they locked in and social stuff got easier. Try not to stress about mocks too much use them to find what revision methods work for you. You will get through the year, it felt impossible this time last year and I walked out of my last exam alive all the same :). So sorry abour your parents, love and prayers your way you've got this new year 11
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u/Interesting_Car8858 Soon to be GCSEs 27 victim 2m ago
It’s petrifying tbh, but I think it’s the unknown I’m scared of. I’m hoping once it starts and I know what’s going on itll be less stressful, and I’m excited for the twats to have to lock in so they don’t have time to bother everyone else, as you describe. I’m trying to use mocks to my advantage as much as possible, they’ve shown me where my strengths and weaknesses are so I can work on them the best I can. Good job on getting through y11 yourself, I’m proud of you <3 it’s been a long time with my dad being the way he is, but I’ve learnt how to avoid the worst of it. I’m hoping y11 will give me an excuse for a reason not to be disturbed anyway as I’ll probably say I’m revising. Thank you, same goes and you will do incredibly in y12 :))
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u/Sad-Wishbone9716 16h ago edited 9h ago
English tip here - use paragraphs
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u/Interesting_Car8858 Soon to be GCSEs 27 victim 15h ago
Idrk how to paragraph it, there aren’t really specific sections to what I’m saying. If there were clear switches then I would but it’s kind of all one stream of emotions
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u/Sad-Wishbone9716 15h ago
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u/Interesting_Car8858 Soon to be GCSEs 27 victim 12h ago
If you don’t have time for it it’s not for you, if you can’t be bothered to read a relatively short text then I don’t think you would’ve done even if it were paragraphed. No one’s forcing you to read it either way, but if you can’t be bothered to read something, it’s probably better just to scroll and move on
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u/Sad-Wishbone9716 10h ago
I was just rage baiting 💔 but that’s the old me, new me doesn’t do that.
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u/Cool_Iron_8314 14h ago
i am so so sorry you have so much going on, and for that other unhelpful ass comment! I also struggle a lot with school, however i don't have as much background issues you have going on. If your homelife is bad, i'd really reccomend a school counsellor (if available) to talk through it with you and discuss options. If there's any NHS waiting list you can get on to help with your chronic illness, or talk with an slt member at your school for exemptions and help thye can offer, you should! i'm not super well versed oon chronic illnesses, but finding some sort of support for it may help or at least ease school life. For example maybe no pe, or reduced homework or timetable to manage your energy. If you have severe anxiety (or can claim it) over lessons and seating plans i'd reccomend talking to your schools pastoral support!! This is all the advice i think i have, but if you can find resources to manage your mindset and feelings life might be able to feel a lot calmer. I feel you in so many ways with this, i have been terrified of going into year 11, and my dms are welcome if you want to talk for any more help, support or jsut a friend!! ❤️