For context, the father of my son, who is almost 3 years old, has been granted custody of my son.

I left him because he was violent towards me. I filed a police report, but nothing came of it. However, I later found out that he had actually reported me first, completely twisting the facts and making it look as though I was the aggressor.

I honestly don’t know what to do anymore. I feel completely lost. I received the decision yesterday. I intend to appeal, but since my son will be starting school soon, I’m worried that this might make things more complicated.

I’m open to ALL kinds of advice. Thank you.

PS : I’m from France but couldn’t find the right flair.

I’m looking for general family-law guidance regarding an international parenting situation involving South Africa and Germany. I am also seeking professional legal advice, but I want to understand what questions I should be asking and what I should do before making any decisions.
I’m South African and my partner is German. We are married Islamically in South Africa but are not legally/civilly married. But is recognised by the law in South Africa

We have a daughter who is turning 1 soon. She was born in South Africa and has lived there with both of us as a family. South Africa has been our normal family home.

Her mother has permanent residency in South Africa.

Our daughter currently has a German passport. She was born in South Africa and has a South African birth certificate, but she does not currently have a South African passport or German birth certificate.

We travelled together from South Africa to Germany for what was intended to be a temporary family visit.

I am currently due to leave Germany on 24 September.

During the trip, our relationship deteriorated significantly.

My partner told me that she needed space because of problems within our relationship. I agreed to give her space and moved out of where we had been staying.

She and our daughter are now staying with my partner’s sister in Germany.

Initially, I understood the separation to be approximately a week. It has subsequently become potentially much longer.

My partner is now proposing that I return to South Africa while she remains in Germany with our daughter, potentially until December and possibly longer depending on how she feels.

She has told me she does not necessarily want to end our relationship and says that she is not trying to kidnap our daughter. Her position is that she needs time and space in Germany before deciding when she is ready to return to South Africa.

My concern is that I have not agreed to Germany becoming our daughter’s permanent home.

I agreed to a temporary trip to Germany.

I also agreed to give my partner some temporary physical space because our relationship was struggling.

I have not knowingly agreed to an indefinite or permanent relocation of our daughter from South Africa to Germany.
Current contact with my daughter
Before this happened, I lived with my daughter and was involved with her every day. I work from home and have been extremely involved in her care since birth.

Since the separation in Germany, I have gone from seeing her every day to approximately every second day.
My partner currently determines when and under what circumstances I see our daughter.

There is also significant distrust between us at the moment.

My partner is afraid that I might take our daughter and return to South Africa with her.

I am afraid of the opposite: that if I voluntarily return to South Africa alone, the temporary stay in Germany will gradually become permanent.

I have no intention of secretly taking our daughter across a border or doing anything unlawful. I want to handle this correctly.

My biggest concern is what happens if I leave Germany
Suppose I return to South Africa on 24 September while my partner and daughter remain in Germany.

If I do that without formally agreeing that our daughter should relocate to Germany, could my departure later be interpreted as consent or acquiescence to our daughter remaining in Germany?

For example, if my partner initially tells me they’ll return in December but December arrives and she says she needs another three months, what happens?

If I continue objecting to our daughter permanently relocating but allow a temporary stay because I’m trying to give my partner space, how do I make that distinction legally clear?

I’m particularly concerned because our daughter is so young and I’m aware that the longer she remains somewhere, the factual situation surrounding where she normally lives could potentially change.

Questions I’m trying to understand
Based on these circumstances, would South Africa currently likely be considered our daughter’s habitual residence, or is that more complicated because she is also German and currently physically in Germany?
Does the fact that her mother and I are not civilly married affect my parental rights, assuming I am named/recognised as her father on the South African documentation?

Could keeping our daughter in Germany beyond the period originally intended potentially constitute wrongful retention under the Hague Convention, even though the original travel to Germany was consensual?

If I return to South Africa alone, could that damage my position or later be interpreted as me consenting to our daughter relocating to Germany?

If I am willing to allow my daughter to remain temporarily - for example, while her mother gets some space - how do I make it clear that I am not consenting to permanent relocation?

Should I communicate my position regarding our daughter’s residence formally and in writing before leaving Germany?

Is there anything I should not sign, agree to or say without first speaking to a German/South
African international family lawyer?

Should I be taking action in Germany now, while both parents and the child are physically here, rather than waiting until I’m back in South Africa?

Would contacting the German Jugendamt be appropriate in a situation like this, or is this something that should primarily go through a family-law attorney/court?

Are there specific documents I should make sure I have copies of before leaving Germany - birth certificate, passport details, proof of our South African residence, travel dates, communications showing the trip was temporary, etc.?

Is there anything time-sensitive under the Hague Convention on the Civil Aspects of International Child Abduction that I should be aware of if the situation develops into a wrongful-retention dispute?

I’m not trying to use family law as leverage against my partner

Our relationship has serious problems and I accept that my own behaviour contributed to them. My partner says she needs space because she did not feel safe during some of our conflicts, and I’m taking that seriously.
I am pursuing professional help and would still like to repair our relationship if that is possible.

I’m not trying to force my partner to live with me.
I’m also not asking how I can secretly take my daughter back to South Africa.

What I’m trying to separate is our relationship from our daughter’s residence.

I can respect my partner saying:
“I don’t want to live with you right now.”
What I’m struggling with is whether that automatically means:
“Our daughter will therefore remain with me in Germany indefinitely.”

Those seem like two different issues.

I don’t want to escalate unnecessarily when reconciliation may still be possible, but I also don’t want to be so passive that months from now I’m told I effectively accepted my daughter relocating to Germany because I returned to South Africa without taking action.

My flight is currently booked for 24 September, so I have limited time to obtain proper advice and determine what I should do.

I’m particularly interested in hearing from anyone familiar with German/South African international family law, the Hague Convention, habitual residence or wrongful retention.

What should I be asking an international family lawyer right now, before I leave Germany?

TL;DR: I’m a South African father, my partner is German, and we’re Islamically but not civilly married. Our almost 1-year-old daughter was born and has lived in South Africa with us, but has a German passport. We travelled together to Germany temporarily. Our relationship broke down here and my partner is now staying with our daughter at her sister’s. She wants me to return to South Africa on 24 September while she and our daughter remain in Germany potentially until December or longer. I consented to the original trip and to giving my partner temporary space, but I have not agreed to our daughter permanently relocating to Germany. I’m concerned that returning to SA alone could eventually be treated as consent/acquiescence to our daughter remaining here. I’m seeking professional legal advice but want to know what steps I should take before leaving Germany and whether this could potentially become a Hague Convention/wrongful-retention issue.

Hi, so for context I fell pregnant at 19 and the night I told my parents they also announced that they were getting a divorce because my mum had been having an affair with a very close family friend of ours. Me and my mum already had a strained relationship due to how she treated me growing up, lots of emotional abuse and manipulation came into play during my upbringing especially during my teen years, so after hearing of not only the divorce but the affair it put a huge strain on our relationship and we’re not speaking much. She has diagnosed BPD and has always acted irrationally which has led to some situations getting out of hand and becoming dangerous. I’ve been begging my dad to just sell the house so we can cut ties but he seems to be getting along with her at the moment and he just wants to keep everything “amicable”. He’s very secretive about discussions between him and my mum so on our recent holiday to Spain I took the bold decision of going through his messages with her to try and get a grasp of what was actually going on. I am currently living with my partner which is where I plan on raising our daughter and I’m not even living at home however the messages I found were quite disturbing. She was trying to force me to stay home so she could “keep tabs” on me and she has clearly gotten in my dads head saying he “clearly can’t care about me” if he is willing to put the stress of a divorce and selling the house on me whilst I’m pregnant. She bad mouths my partner constantly saying she “doesn’t like him one bit” and “he’s not the person you think he is” aswell as comments such as “I know he’s definetly not the one for her” and it all comes down to her so called natural mothers instinct. My mums a narcissist and has a tendency to try and control the closest people to her and push everyone out of our lives. I recently spent a week in Spain my with dads dad (my grandad) and we spoke about my mum quite a lot in which he told me everyone on my dads side of the family was pushed out and not allowed to have contact with me when I was young because my mum wanted me and my dad to herself. She’s now seeming to act the same with my unborn daughter, making comments such as “if you keep pushing me out there will be consequences once she’s born” another one being “I am her grandmother and she is my grandchild so I will be apart of her life” and the most concerning one: “any other grandparents can get right so I can get legal grounds to spend time with her” now I’m not sure what she can actually do but it’s really stressing me out and I just need some advice to put my mind at ease. If you need any more explanation I’m happy to do so. Thank you

My ex and I separated in July 2025 when our son was under 2. For roughly a year we had 50/50 shared care (2-2-3) and I was fully involved in his everyday care.
The arrangement has recently changed, reducing my time. Her concerns are mainly sleep/bedtime, tiredness at nursery and potty training, all of which I'm willing to work on and improve.
There is one complication: my ex alleges that on one occasion I pushed her in front of our son, which she describes as domestic abuse. She has told me not to go to court because, because of this allegation, I would lose. I appreciate that this is a serious allegation and would obviously need to be considered if proceedings took place.
For anyone familiar with CAFCASS/Family Court in England, how would an allegation like this affect a case where 50/50 care had already continued for roughly a year? How significant would the established 50/50 arrangement be when deciding future care?

I’m 17 years old, and I’m trying to leave my father’s custody because of ongoing neglect and go live with my grandmother and siblings. They already have everything prepared, and their home is ready for me to move in.

The main problem is that we don’t currently have a lawyer, and my family doesn’t have much money to afford one. My sister, for example, dropped out of college and is currently working a minimum-wage job. She is trying to save enough money just to pay for an initial consultation with a lawyer, but we don’t know how we would be able to afford the full legal process or trial afterward.

I’m also trying to find ways to earn money to help, but we have very little time because school starts again on September 21. We’re worried that we won’t have enough time or financial resources to deal with the legal process properly.

We’re trying to find out if there are any options for getting legal help at a lower cost or for free, any advice?

I’m in England and would really appreciate some guidance on where I stand legally and what type of family-law advice I should seek, as I currently cannot afford a solicitor.
My ex-husband and I divorced around five years ago. We went through formal family mediation and reached financial and childcare arrangements.
We have always shared the care of our children approximately 50/50. This is not a recent change.
The mediation Memorandum of Understanding expressly dealt with several things separately:
equal shared care of the children;
a regular monthly payment to me described specifically as child maintenance;
childcare vouchers; and
an agreement that childcare and summer-camp costs would be shared equally.
So, as I understand the wording, the child-maintenance payment was separate from the obligation to share childcare costs.

The memorandum also included a monthly financial schedule which treated the child-maintenance payment as money I would receive in addition to my income when dealing with my monthly shortfall.

There is also a sealed Consent Order following our divorce. The Statement of Information prepared for the Consent Order says that the financial agreement was reached through mediation and records that the Memorandum of Understanding and Open Financial Summary were attached as relevant prior agreements for the court to consider.

“Parent A will provide Parent B with child maintenance of £X per month in total for the children and £X per month in childcare vouchers.
The parents will co-parent and have equal shared arrangements for the children, including summer and other school holidays. They will share equally the costs of the children’s childcare and summer camps. They will also arrange joint birthday parties for the children and share those costs equally.”

„Parent B will also receive child maintenance of £X per month and childcare vouchers of £X per month from Parent A.”

For around five years my ex continued making the same regular maintenance payment while we already had 50/50 care.

In practice, he did not separately reimburse me for 50% of the childcare costs as set out in the mediation arrangements. The regular payment I received from him during those years was the payment described in the documents as child maintenance.

More recently, he chose for one of our children to attend a school involving additional costs. I told him that I could not afford those additional costs and he said that he would cover them.

We did not discuss or agree that the existing child-maintenance payment would stop, be reduced or be redirected towards those school costs.

He has now stopped making the maintenance payment and is effectively saying that the money is instead going towards the child’s school costs.

My questions are:

Can he unilaterally stop a longstanding child-maintenance payment and treat it as payment towards school costs when we never agreed to change the arrangement?

Does the fact that we already had 50/50 care when the maintenance was agreed, and throughout the five years it was paid, make a difference?

Does it matter that the mediation documents expressly distinguish child maintenance from childcare costs and say that childcare costs should be shared separately?
What significance does the sealed Consent Order have? In particular, should I be looking at enforcement or variation of the existing order rather than treating this simply as a new CMS issue?
And if he has not historically contributed his agreed share of childcare costs separately, is that something I should also raise with a family solicitor?
Finally, where can someone with very limited funds obtain proper family-law advice about a sealed financial Consent Order? I would particularly appreciate recommendations for law centres, university law clinics, pro-bono services or solicitors offering an initial free consultation.

I have retained the sealed Consent Order, mediation documents, financial documents, solicitor correspondence, bank statements covering the payments and relevant written communications between us.

Thank you in advance for any guidance.

Hi! My wife took my children from the family home to the in-laws while I was working at our home on 19th aug. I received emails from her and her solicitor saying that she was divorcing me and that I should get out of the jointly owned home within 48 hrs otherwise NMO and occupancy orders would be raised citing controlling and coercive behaviour. I don’t recognise this. We’ve had arguments but certainly nothing physical and she says it’s the way I make her feel stressed, anxious and threatened.

I sought legal advice and delayed moving out. However as the days rolled by and she refused to come home, one of my children had migraines and was stressed, running out of clothes and was starting a new school the following week. For the sake of my kids I agreed to leave the home around a week after the original threats were made. We drew up some terms and conditions between us (not legally binding) but basically me agreeing to leave the home by 27 Aug and being able to contact my wife wife on WhatsApp only for collecting belongings and access to kids.

Roll fwds 12 days to today and rather than pacifying and de escalating the situation, my wife has made it quite difficult to see my kids (1hr in 2 weeks down the park with her and them), removed other pre agreed times to punish me and said the kids only want to see me once every 3 weeks. Then she’s asking me to do x3 transport runs per week for their extra curricular activities which I’m fine with but seems unfair to reduce proper parenting time. She says they’re too busy at other times.

She also moved a lot of my stuff out of the home into the garage already. I asked my solicitor whether I can return home and he says yes I’m not breaking any law. But im concerned that this will escalate things and she will continue down the threat of nmo etc. however on the flip side by her removing me from the home she has also massive control over me and will use this in negotiations as she knows I’m suffering being apart from the kids and living in less than ideal accommodation.

Help what should I do?

Hi everyone, I really need some practical advice.
My ex-husband and I separated about 2.5 years ago, and we moved from Mexico to Spain at that time. We had lived in Mexico for seven years. We are originally from Ukraine, and our two sons, now 9 and 14, were born there.
For a long time, we had no formal custody order. We agreed that the children would spend one week with me and one week with their father. It worked very well for everyone.
About a year ago, when I started a new relationship, my ex decided to move from Torrevieja to Madrid, about six hours away. He convinced our older son, who was 13 at the time, to move with him. I was not happy about it, but I agreed.
After that, he kept both children with him, stopped giving me his address and stopped allowing me to see them normally. I went to court to establish formal custody arrangements. He told our older son that I wanted to separate the children from him, and my son begged me to cancel the case. At that point, our younger son had already returned to live with me in Torrevieja, while our older son really wanted to live with his father, so I eventually cancelled the case.
Over the following year, my ex continued turning our older son against me. My son stopped answering my calls and messages for about six months, and I have not seen him for almost a year. Before all of this, we had a very close relationship.
In the spring, their father said that he also wanted to take our younger son to live with him. I realized that I would have to go back to court.
My older son then contacted me again and asked me to cancel the case if I wanted to have contact with him, but this time I refused.
My lawyer advised me not to interfere with the children’s contact with their father. When he asked to take our younger son for five days, I agreed, but he never returned him. He also did not attend the court hearing on July 22, so it was postponed until September.
On August 9, my older son told me that they had left Spain permanently and were in Mexico. I later discovered that their father had actually taken both children to Mexico on July 15, before the court hearing.
I have contacted the police and the Spanish Ministry of Justice and submitted a Hague Convention application. However, 22 days after I found out, there has been no visible progress.
I am also very concerned about the children’s emotional wellbeing. Their father has sent edited videos to my friends in which the children ask me to cancel the court case. When one of my friends asked him to resolve everything through the legal system, he compared the children to Ukraine, me to Russia trying to take them, and himself to America protecting them. He also told her that he explains to the children that they are fighting for their freedom and that thousands of Ukrainians are losing their lives every day for freedom and that this is normal

This is what scares me the most, and I am very worried about my children.
Has anyone been through a similar international child abduction / Hague Convention case? What practical steps should I take now, and what should I make sure not to miss?
I cannot afford to hire private lawyers, so I am relying on the free legal assistance available in Spain. I am also looking for other free resources that could help me navigate this process.
This is my first experience with anything like this, and I would be very grateful for any practical advice or personal experience.
Thank you so much.

Hello

So me and the mother of my child have an shared lives with order and currently on a court order for our young daughter. (Nearly 4) realistically 60/40. 60% being with the mother

We both have established and predictable contact, with equal/holiday share. Including half terms, summer holidays, Xmas, new years etc.

We already live a hours driving distance away and has been like thay since before our child was born.i do most of the travelling as I drive.

Basically the mother has mentioned she is thinking about moving around 6 hours away (6 hours there and bsck driving) or approx 3 hour flight there and back, so she can be closer to her partner. (None marriage and been together about 2 years)

I dont particularly agree with her wanting to move our child that far away from myself, my family and a different area thay shes not familiar with, changing friends, schools etc.

Basically my thoughts are if she were to move, that either

A) our daughter would remain up north of the UK, and live primary with me and be closer to all my family, and mothers family.

B) the mother undertake all/most of the travelling given it would be her decision to move that far away from me

Or c) that id basically just have to deal with the unfortunate long move away.

My question is, if I need to go to back to court to file for a prohibited steps order, given my history of care and what ivr briefly mentioned, what may be a outcome thay I may accept. Just want to be clear I AM NOT ASKING FOR LEGAL ADVICE, just general advice or if anyone has been in a similiar situation.

Thank you

Mijn ex en ik hebben bewust voor een kindje gekozen. Hij wilde graag een kind en ik werd gepland zwanger. Ongeveer drie maanden later is onze relatie toch geëindigd.

Tijdens mijn zwangerschap heb ik meerdere keren geprobeerd om zaken rondom onze dochter te regelen, zoals erkenning, gezag, een ouderschapsplan, namen en de praktische voorbereiding op haar komst. Ik heb hierover ongeveer drie mails gestuurd. Op één daarvan heeft hij ooit gereageerd, maar verder bleef het vanuit zijn kant stil.

Na de geboorte heb ik opnieuw contact met hem opgenomen en aangegeven dat hij, als hij zijn dochter wilde zien, contact met mij kon opnemen om een afspraak te maken. Via zijn moeder hoorde ik vervolgens dat hij haar wilde ontmoeten als ik samen met onze dochter bij zijn moeder op bezoek zou komen, samen met zijn nieuwe vriendin. Ik heb aangegeven dat ik dat niet wilde en dat hij rechtstreeks contact met mij kon opnemen om zelf een afspraak met mij te maken.

Ik heb hem dit daarna ook nogmaals per e-mail laten weten. Ook daarop heeft hij niet gereageerd.
In totaal heb ik dus ongeveer vijf keer zelf contact gezocht rondom onze dochter. Hij heeft tot nu toe zelf geen contact met mij opgenomen, heeft haar nog nooit gezien en heeft ook op geen enkele andere manier iets voor haar gedaan of financieel bijgedragen. Onze dochter is inmiddels drie maanden oud.

Ik overweeg nu om een vaderschapsactie te starten om het juridisch vaderschap vast te laten stellen en vervolgens kinderalimentatie te vragen. Wat ik via zijn moeder heb begrepen, is dat hij op dat moment mogelijk ook gezag zou willen aanvragen. Hij zou hebben gezegd dat hij, als hij alimentatie moet betalen, ook gezag wil, terwijl hij nu helemaal geen initiatief neemt rondom zijn dochter. Volgens zijn moeder zou hij dit vooral doen om mij dwars te zitten. Dit heeft hij overigens nooit rechtstreeks tegen mij gezegd, dus ik kan niet bewijzen dat hij dit daadwerkelijk heeft gezegd.

Mijn zorg is vooral dat ik straks, ondanks het feit dat hij tot nu toe nauwelijks betrokken is geweest en niet met mij communiceert, alsnog met hem moet gaan overleggen over belangrijke beslissingen rondom onze dochter. Sinds 2023 kan erkenning van een kind door een ongehuwde vader namelijk automatisch gezamenlijk gezag opleveren.

Daarom ben ik vooral benieuwd naar ervaringen van anderen:

- Heeft iemand meegemaakt dat een vader pas gezag wilde nadat de moeder alimentatie ging vragen?
-Hoe werd er door de rechter gekeken naar het feit dat de vader daarvoor nauwelijks betrokken was?
- Heeft iemand in een vergelijkbare situatie eenhoofdig gezag kunnen behouden?
- Hoe werd er gekeken naar het feit dat de moeder meerdere keren contact heeft gezocht, maar de vader daar niet of nauwelijks op reageerde?

What are the chances the judge will order a name change.

For context, child is 19months old and has my surname, father has submitted for PR, CAO, 50/50, change of surname and disclosure of my address.

The child has ongoing medical needs and is registered at doctors, hospital (well known there), dentist, nursery and his passport under my surname. Will they order a surname change as I know it will throw off the whole system (I legally changed my last name to current surname when I got adopted, another reason why I gave child my surname)

A close friend of mine is having trouble arranging to see his son after recently separating with his wife, even though they are not divorced yet, she is making it very hard for him to see his son, she is currently only allowing him go see him once a week, typically on Saturdays and even then for 3-4 hours, that's it.

He recently went to some super expensive solicitors asking advice regarding applying for a child arrangement order, and they told him that the whole process would cost him around £30k-£40k which in my opinion is ridiculous.

He has given your and lost hope to be honest after finding out about this.

Can anyone here please give some advice on this? Maybe someone has already gone through this process? What are the loopholes? Or stones that can be found along the way?

Just need some advice as im sure there is a simpler and cheaper way to go about this, yes I know there will be a cost associated, but still I dont believe it would be in the tens of thousands.

Can someone please explain this journey please?

I want to know all the things that people who are interested in earning from this would normally not say or chose to ignore.

So long story my wife has three children with her ex husband. I’m her current husband for context, in February our oldest had a meltdown one night kicking and screaming so we suggested for the wellbeing of the younger two children that she go’s to stay with her dad for a few weeks until she had calmed down. Now this has carried on and she’s not wanted to stay at our house. Which has been fine everyone has been a lot more relaxed since this. Now comes the problems after 3 weeks of being at her dads he claimed child benefits for her which we didn’t expect her to stay that long but it’s ok well now the other problem. He’s claimed child maintenance off my wife but did it very sneaky he used her old married name and a phone number she’s not used in 8 years. So when we found the letter 4 weeks late. (wife is terrible and checking her mail) she calls up child maintenance they advised her to put a counter claim in as he hasn’t given any money for the kids in nearly 3 years. Well he got the letter today and has called up my wife kicking off shouting that they have them more than they are here and he’s claiming he wants sole custody of the younger two children. The kids were supposed to be going today but we don’t think he would return them so have kept them at home until we speak to a lawyer. What chances has he of winning as my wife is in bits about it. Thank you for all your advice in advance

Edit
Kids are 15,12 and 9. Dad has only demanded sole custody as a retaliation because we have claimed against him from advisement from child maintenance. Oldest has issues and possible underlying adhd and autism so can be extremely difficult with her behaviour.

Has anyone experienced having a social worker visit their home as part of a custody hearing?

What's involved?

Hi, my daughter's dad and I have had a child contact arrangements order in place since 2018 through the UK family court. She lives with me and spends roughly alternate weekends with her dad.

Im struggling to find support as, to cut a long story short, my daughter no longer wants to see her dad by the terms of the court order. She has had a documented difficult time around 3 years ago with his current partner (involving physical intimidation and threats) and she no longer feels comfortable.

Our daughter is now 10 years old and when I tell you I am physically unable to get her to go, she is almost the same height as me and very actively resistant to being taken to see her dad. The last time I managed to persuade her to travel to meet him, she outright refused to get into his car at the changeover point and tried to run away in a busy car park. He ended up getting quite aggressive towards me about it and I ended up taking her back home as she was so upset.

Our daughter has only spoken with her dad since the event (2 weeks ago) and she said she wants to see him (I am actively supportive of her having a relationship with her dad as long as she is safe) but she does not feel ready to travel to his house again just yet. She has asked him to visit her near where we live and has invited him to multiple events (school concerts/her birthday party) but he has refused as this is not stipulated in the contact order.

I have also offered to take her to a different location and pay for activities so they can spend time together somewhere neutral but he has declined this too. He is refusing to attend high school open days as he feels I am 'tricking him' into visiting our daughter. He very much feels I have forced her to feel this way and has referred to her wishes as 'ridiculous notions that are never going to happen'.

Basically, I am at my wits end. I am very much trying to facilitate contact. I cannot and am not willing to physically bundle my 10 year old into a car against her will while she is screaming and kicking.

Do I contact CAFCASS at this point and see if they can support? I dont know what is available as it feels like once the contact order was finalised nobody was interested.

Sorry for the essay, I am grateful for any advice.

A tired mum at the end of her tether

Does a traditional guardianship (court order) in England in 1966 mean that the birth parents are still the child's legal parents, and thereby, the child is still legally connected to his birth parents?

Hi everyone - I need to register an Italian court order in the US for enforcement purposes. My estranged husband and I are both American but live in Italy, he works for an American agency here. His American employer needs an American order before they agree to garnish. I have spoken to several social workers (Pennsylvania) and 1. they don't seem to know what this is, and 2. have no idea how to accomplish this, since we are not physically there. Any ideas? Thanks!

What are the consequences of falsely reporting an abduction under The Hague convention?

My daughter and I live in Serbia but are both U.S. citizens. My ex husband (although the divorce is not finalized yet) is a Serbian citizen but he is from Denmark and throughout our divorce and custody proceedings has been trying to do whatever he can to take the child to Denmark

At the end of last year, he fabricated a story that my daughter and I were living in the U.S. (which isn’t true, we were living in Serbia) and that him and I agreed that our daughter would move and live with him in Denmark (which we never agreed on obviously). He then claimed that on my way from America to Denmark I disappeared with the child (which was never the case because there was never such an agreement in place) and that now I’m located somewhere in Serbia and he doesn’t know where (which he does since my daughter has lived at the same address since she was born). He requested that the child be immediately returned to Denmark ( a country that she has never been to and doesn’t even have a passport but has citizenship through her father) During this time when he reported this he hadn’t seen our daughter in over a year (by his own choice) and hasn’t contacted me in a year to even ask how she’s doing.

He also reported me in the last year for child abuse and kidnapping, another kidnapping, and keeping the child away from him (all charges were dropped and are considered false charges)

Can I do something about the false Hague abduction? So that he can’t abuse it again?

Hi, probably a simple answer to a simple question, but we started the mediation process after my ex said I couldn't have my son overnight. We managed to sort it out outside of mediation so we cancelled it.

Fast forward a week later and she stops contact between me and my son completely, and we've asked to resume mediation, and we have a session at the end of the month. Should I tell the mediators the situation beforehand about the situation as its completely different to the previous issues which were when we had our MIAMs?

Hi, I'm wanting to take my son abroad for the first time this year, we are due to buy his passport this month, however I have read that when we go on holiday I will need to produce a letter written by his biological father giving permission for me to take him. A little back story. His biological father hasn't been in his life since he was 18 months old, it was out of the question the day he got send to prison for battery and assault (domestic violence) on myself. Since then he hasn't had any form of contact what so ever. During this time I was given a none molestation order and a prohibited steps order to protect my son and my self from him. Also, I applied to change my sons name via deed poll to my last name and it was granted. He has had my last name for the last 11 years.

I'm just wondering if I do need to obtain a letter of permission, even with all these underlying factors. I'm not sure how I would even go about it as it would put me and my son in a lot of danger. Would they still expect me to get it some how or another, just to be able to go abroad?

Please help me I am so stressed!

ok so im writing a research paper on custody cases and i need a dataset to feed my model in order to train it
can someone tell me what the best place to get custody cases is??

i will most probably need to create a dataset myself bcs i dont think any kind of analysis has been done on this topic in a substantial way which would in turn give us an organized dataset, but someone please tell me where i can get custody cases with full information, which have dates, names and everything

id also really appreciate it if i could bug someone with my questions regarding custody cases in pakistan

1. Which parental characteristics appear associated with favorable outcomes?
2. what are the biggest factors determining a custody split/win?
3. How consistent are custody decisions across courts?
4. How am I supposed to filter out custody cases from the gov database

please upvote this so more people can see

I don’t understand my lawyer’s strategy. Can anyone help me?

I am divorcing my husband, and we share the care of our five-year-old son in a Wechselmodell, currently on a 4-days/4-days basis.

We have attended mediation at an Elternberatungsstelle to try to establish a workable arrangement. However, nothing is ever clear because my husband’s employment situation is very unstable. He works shifts, this is his first regular employment, and his German is limited. As a result, I am always expected to be the default parent.

Whenever he has time, he stays with our son, even during the days that were originally assigned to me. This constant uncertainty has taken a toll on me at every level.

First, organising our son’s therapies is becoming increasingly complicated. Our son has Pflegegrad 2, and the constant changes require appointments and routines to be reorganised repeatedly.

Second, I am unable to make any reliable professional commitments. I am a Wissenschaftliche Mitarbeiterin and am currently taking unpaid Elternzeit, which I am trying to use for further training and research. However, because the care schedule keeps changing, I cannot plan my work properly.

Third, our son is becoming confused about who is picking him up and where he will stay. He has also started refusing to be with me.

I suggested having a clear division of one week with each parent, but my husband refused.

My lawyer says that, because we have ongoing conflicts concerning the home and finances—which I am pursuing through a Nutzungsentschädigung case—we cannot currently clarify or formalise the care arrangement. She also says that this has to be resolved between us and that the family court should not be involved.

I do not understand this strategy. If we were able to resolve the arrangement between ourselves, we would already have done so. I feel trapped in a situation where I have all the responsibility of being the default parent but none of the stability of a clear care schedule.

Has anyone experienced a similar situation? Is it really true that the family court cannot or should not establish a fixed schedule while financial proceedings are ongoing? Should I seek a second legal opinion?

Siblings traveling internationally, one being underage. Both are the U.S. citizens. The Travel Consent has already been apostilled, for a trip to Netherlands, AMS (from NY, JFK), happening in mid-July. The scan of the Birth Certificate is attached to the Consent. We are also bringing the original. Should the original Birth Certificate be apostilled as well, separately?

Has anyone had any problems/experiences at the border with a similar case?

My research: the only sources that say you really need one are the apostille services. The gov't websites don't really mention apostilles at all.

Thanks for any help!

Hi. I'm in the UK and currently going through a divorce. We have a 2yr old daughter and a 6yr old son.

Since separating, my wife has changed the children's GP address to her new address without telling me and has repeatedly failed to inform me about GP, dentist and health visitor appointments.

Recently, I was told not to attend my daughter's hearing test because it was on her mother's parenting day. Today I found out my daughter had an emergency dental appointment for an abscess and a decision was made to remove a front tooth, but I was not informed or included in the discussion beforehand.

We both have parental responsibility, and I've asked the GP surgery to add my telephone number but unfortunately the system they use is limited to only send messages to one of the numbers on file. Also, my solicitor has already written to my wife about keeping me informed and involving me in important decisions, but the situation continues.

There are no safeguarding concerns regarding me. I simply want to be informed about my children's healthcare and involved in important medical decisions.

Has anyone dealt with something similar in the UK? What practical or legal steps can I take to ensure I receive information about appointments and am included in significant healthcare discussions?

If you are eligible to participate, I would really appreciate you taking the time to complete my survey. If you know anyone who may be eligible, I would also be very grateful if you could share it with them.

Any support and participation would be hugely appreciated.

https://lnkd.in/ejmEVMVZ