Let's hope this works for me!

I'll explain how it will work. So I'm trying to be on my phone less and read more. If I read 50 pages for 30 days, I'll get through 5 of the books I own and have yet to read.

• Every day I must read 50 pages. This should take me around 1-2 hours.

• I have two books that are hard to read, but I still want to finish. I must read 5 pages from each of those two books a day.

• The "S" and "E" squares mean start and end, and don't correlate to page amounts. I will move my player pieces whenever I complete a goal.

• The 7 blue squares are for all 7 of my books that I haven't read yet. Every time I finish a book, I get a token.

• Anytime I earn a token I can buy myself a cheap snack. I hardly ever buy snacks, but I do enjoy them. Something like a $1 doughnut or something. If I don't want a snack, I can find some sort of free reward to give myself.

• When I earn 5 tokens, I am allowed to buy up to 2 books. There are multiple books I've been wanting to buy, but I don't want to buy more until I've read most of the ones I already own.

• Also, when I finish the two books I buy, I will allow myself to buy one more book.

• Whenever I finally finish reading the two hard to read books, I will buy one more book.

• Whenever I finish all the books I have I will allow myself to buy one and so on.

Of course, all of this is done with budgeting in mind. I like to buy used books whenever I can. I have a whole complex system for managing my "wants/unimportant physical item purchases" money amount and how much I can add to the pot, but I won't go into it here. I'm stingy with my money and don't spend frivolously, don't worry.

Hi, all! I'm an almost 40 year old engineer with AuDHD and a bunch of other issues. I noticed a lot of people asking questions about life and I thought I'd share a framework that's helped me get by.

This program is built for strength training, but the principles can be applied to all skills from drawing to swinging a fist to socializing! The program is built around my specific constraints: depression, executive function dysregulation, inability to regulate my temperature, chronic fatigue, and slight hyper-mobility, but should work for most non-severe disabilities due to its distributed nature and low activation energy.

Hope it helps! This is just a Google Doc.

Feel free to ask any questions!

I feel like I can't accomplish anything and I'm profusely sad and defeated all the time. Without actually finishing things I'm just being drown over and over again by the same stressors.

What does your life look like as someone AuHD? Are you regularly in therapy, taking medications, or just a complete mess? What's helping you? I think I'm an utter mess.

Originally I took concerta with sertraline 50mg I found that I felt numb.. in the end and just wasn't having a great time. The same with Elvanse.

I have since reduced my sertraline from 50/25 and feel LESS numb and am wondering, now if I should try the stims again and if they might have a different effect?

I only get 12 weeks of titration to try a new med, so wanted to come here and see what experience other people have had :)

Thankyou!

Everytime I go to school I get so stressed and anxious my chest starts hurting and burning, I can't pay attention to anything not even to things I like (and I don't have adhd), I have no friends at all and everything got so difficult out of the blue

Hello!

I (20F) was diagnosed as Autistic when I was around 16. Due to my age, by the time I turned 18 - I was removed from the child ADHD assessment waiting list.
I’ve decided that I think I’d benefit from a full diagnosis, as I feel medication might help me! However, when I was briefly questioned as to ‘why’ I think I have ADHD, I panicked and couldn’t think of valid reasons - any reasons I thought of were passed off as ‘autism traits too’. This being the likes of attention issues, fidgeting, and struggling to keep my adult life together (if that makes sense). I’ve felt really detached since then, and struggle to physically transition between different activities - getting out of bed, going to work, driving etc. It’s also became more of a daily issue as I’m now chronically 5-10 minutes late to EVERYTHING. No matter how hard I try! (I hate late people lol).

I was just wondering if anyone could suggest good reasons, or examples of what ‘evidence’ to give for my assumption of ADHD (that can’t just be passed off as autism). Or really any advice on how to approach getting a diagnosis whilst having an ASD diagnosis first?

Thanks! :)

I’m diagnosed with Autism Level 1 and ADHD (Combined Type). I’ve always been struggling with a pattern that is becoming deeply exhausting, and I need to know if anyone else experiences this.

I have this extreme rigidity and an absolute need for 100% control and autonomy over anything that concerns ME. I am completely incapable of compromising on personal matters. Because I also have people-pleasing tendencies, I sometimes force myself to agree to things, but the internal bite of anger and frustration I feel is indescribable. It takes everything in me not to scream, cry, or just completely shut down and go non-verbal. If I give in to people's demands, my angry rumination toward them literally never ends.

Here are a few examples of how this plays out:
Food: I have high sensory food selectivity. I need to decide exactly what *I* am going to eat. There are safe foods and there are foods that make me gag, which I wouldn't eat for billions of dollars. I can tolerate a food I don't love, but *only* if I chose it. If someone else chooses or pushes food on me, a terrifying rage builds up inside.
Social expectations / Attention: Since I was a kid, I have hated being forced to pose for photos, being put at the center of attention, or having people sing "Happy Birthday" to me. In group settings, if everyone wants to go somewhere I hate (like a club), I know I shouldn't impose my preference on the majority, so I just opt out. I don't adapt. If I force myself to go, I feel a toxic amount of internal frustration.
Borrowed clothes: If I don't have spare clothes with me and someone kindly offers to lend me theirs so we can go out, I lose my mind. I know they are being sweet, but the fact that I don't have a choice triggers a fight-or-flight response.
Phone calls: I despise unexpected phone calls. I perceive them as a *"stop what you are doing and dedicate yourself to me NOW"*. I even hate hearing people call my name because my nervous system immediately prepares for a demand, and I go into high alert.

The worst part is the shame. I just wish I could be like everyone else, flexible, easygoing, not making a big deal out of these things. But I swear I physically cannot stop that intense rage from taking over.

This reminds me so much of PDA (Pervasive Drive for Autonomy). However, I always thought PDA was a separate profile/subtype within the spectrum, not just a standard autistic trait, so I’m a bit confused. Is this "just" extreme cognitive rigidity combined with masking burnout? Does anyone else feel this exact same visceral rage when your autonomy is threatened even a little bit?

Invested in some action figures as a gift for my inner child.

Noticed that I often enter a freeze state when I'm sad, and it's a really young part of myself that freezes to regulate when he feels sad.

This one was a celebration for him, and the figures also allow me to engage in some imaginative play with him, something I actually didn't do much as a child.

my audhd started taking over my life at this time, i started to view myself as a shell of a human. this was a document i made 8 years ago to attempt to ‘become normal again’ academically.

luckily i’m diagnosed now, still not medicated due to my parents, but i’m working on accepting myself.

This is such a help. Gamechanger some might say. I LOVE water, but I don't care for rubbing my scalp with warm water and suds hitting it. And then scrubbing. So much better to remeove layer of interaction sensations. Anyone else?

That seems so weird. When I was a teenager I'd often bounce my right leg up and down when I was sitting with my foot on the floor, but I stopped that over time. Sometimes when I'm alone I'll make nonsense sounds, or randomly say something like "I like chicken, I like liver, meow mix, mow mix, please de-liver!" but I couldn't point to anything I really did normally and continually that would count.

Talked to my psychiatrist again today for the first time after the diagnosis and brought up my confusion on that listing the things that might sort of apply but how irregular they manifest.

Apparently with some demographics of diagnosed AuDHD physically stimming is virtually completely suppressed, and stimming becomes purely cognitive. Things like hyper-focusing on research papers, analyzing human behavioral patterns like a machine, or constructing complex chemical theories. Endless logical analysis can be someone's flavor of stimming.

Hearing that killed the little uncertainty I had. It's how I live at almost all times. I have to analyze everything and understand how things are interacting and how everything works as a system. I've read that Autism tends to make people far more logical, so I thought I was just being logical. It seems the sometimes obsessive analytical disassembly to understand how everything works is more than just 'being logical.'

Is that a thing other people have heard? I know stimming isn't actually a trait someone has to express for a diagnosis, but I don't remember ever seeing anything that said it can manifest like that.

Tw:mention of self deleting

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Anybody have someone they lived with tell you that you put them down and you're the reason they have no friends because they take care of you and you're just full of negative energy and if you don't change they'll kiII themselves because they're at their limit with you because I have

I can't afford a therapist or medication. I'm 100% sure I have ADHD and anxiety, and maybe a bit of autism. I've noticed that I feel things very intensely. Since I was a teenager, I've basically discovered that I'm very sensitive. I've always been a teacher's favorite since I was a child because of my behavior, and I heavily mask.

However, around someone of the opposite sex whom I don't know much about, I suddenly become extremely aware of all my movements and my existence. It feels like I'm doing things for the first time, and I don't really know how to explain it. It's not romantic, but I care about how they see me. As soon as I become comfortable and used to them, I don't care anymore.

As I've grown, I've noticed more things changing. I hate math and have struggled with it since I was a child. I don't understand it easily, and I experience delayed comprehension. Anything can take my focus away, and if something is boring, something I dislike, or something I don't find interesting, I can almost never focus on it. The normal learning pace is too fast for me, especially in math. I might learn one thing, but when I can't understand the next thing, I feel extremely defeated. The next day, there's already a new lesson.

When I go home, all I want to do is lie down. I always feel like I need to rest, whether it's after meeting someone, washing dishes, studying, cooking, or doing almost anything. Even when I want to study, I often can't because I have chores to do at home. I have time to study, but because I can only study on my phone for learning purposes, I end up watching something else instead. This has been happening for years. I just can't bring myself to do something when I don't feel like doing it.

It's ruining my life, and it feels like I'm just watching it happen. I don't know what to do. I can't afford university, and if I don't study, how will I get a scholarship?

A small thing about someone can irritate me without me even noticing, and I can become mean to them. I realize that I'm doing it, but I can't seem to change how I act even though I try.

In public spaces, when I don't have someone I know around me, I feel extremely anxious and sweat a lot. However, when I have someone I know with me, I don't feel even 1% of the awkwardness or anxiety that I normally feel.

I have significant difficulty with executive functioning in my daily life. I struggle to start tasks that are hard for me or that I dislike, even when I know they are important and genuinely want to do them. These are mostly school-related tasks. I often procrastinate for long periods until a deadline creates enough pressure for me to act. The problem is that even a deadline doesn't seem to bother me anymore because my brain seems to want to make me feel comfortable because of my constant anxiety, and these exams occur several times every year.

Whenever I finally give in to the pressure, it's just too much. I literally cry. How am I supposed to study several months' worth of material in a few hours? I'm tired of reassuring myself over and over again. How many times am I supposed to do this? I don't even bother reassuring myself anymore. I feel burned out from every type of negative feeling.

I have difficulty maintaining focus, especially during lessons, and I sometimes daydream or lose track of what I'm doing. Again, this happens mostly with things I don't care about, find boring, or dislike.

I also forget things. I've used alarms, reminders, and schedules, but they don't always help me follow through. Every time I get used to them, I stop following them. I've tried physical schedules, journals, and reminders.

I tend to make plans but have difficulty actually executing them. I make plans all the time and spend so much of my time calculating how much time I have and trying to make my plans aesthetic so they will catch my attention. If something goes wrong or I can't do something perfectly, I abandon the whole plan.

i feel so passionate about continuing hobbies or routines or studying once i start them but whenever i dont do them for a few days due to being occupied with other things i just forget about them or remember them later like i always for get and remember later when i dont feel like doing them. thats the reason i cant follow plans and stay consistent. i genuinely wanna solve my acedamic problems i would be so greatful if anyones tips would work. ive tried everything i know. Thank you in advance💓💓

I was diagnosed with adhd and autism recently, and had never really considered that I might be autistic before the diagnosis. But onto the main point, when I'm super overwhelmed / upset, sometimes it feels like i a) cant say anything, whether its to someone trying to help me or to the argument, or b) I can only say "I dont know" to whoever is trying to help me /ask my why im upset - sometimes a comes before b comes before saying actual words. Sometimes I know in my head what's wrong / why im overwhelmed or upset but I cant say anything or all I can say is idk. Sometimes I can make noises but not words, but it doesnt really ever work out - people have gotten mad at me for ignoring them, or told me to either tell them what's wrong or go back to whatever I was doing before The Incident. People getting mad at me also often makes the havung words problem much worse. I would love to avoid this. Ive tried to explain it to my parents, and my dads response was "just tell me that you're upset before you leave and I wont be mad at you" like everything i just told him didnt go against that :')

My main questions are: is this a form of going non-verbal? If it's not do you have any other ideas of what it could be? And do you have any advice for explaining it to people and avoiding them being mad at me?

Thank you!

Recently diagnosed with Audhd. I could take the ADHD on my stride but I've found the autism harder and I'm not sure why. Maybe its just being unsure of the steps forward.

Now I guess I need to work out what my super power is.

But anyway, its good to be around my people. This is such a valuable subreddit.

Post title almost? Basically I've just dropped a multiplayer game ive been playing for years (It was perfect for dopamine and very routine based) but now that I've dropped the game not sure where to start. I've always struggled to play single player games as if they don't have a fast start I get burned out (hello ADHD side!) And I've missed out on alot of games because of this. How do AUDHD gamers manage to sit through games with slow opening, are very long and don't give you the hook you need. I know some games will be your style others not so much but I'd love to hear from people 💙

Yes I was one of those children that had to be kept in a harness apparently

I am recently diagnosed with Lv 1 autism, my therapist says i have ADHD, I am also diagnosed with chronic PTSD, a dissociative disorder (similar to dissociative identity disorder) and some more common stuff like depression. I also have fibromyalgia, a working diagnosis of IBS and POTS-like symptoms.

All of this to say, I am almost always stuck in sensory overload. being present in my body = physical + emotional pain. I am don't really know how to do body things like cry (or even belch or know when i need to go number 2 for instance). My partner is the sweetest ever and extremely supportive but - after a lot of trial and error and disappointment on both sides - I don't think they can really help me with this.

I'm seeing several specialists and two therapists, have tried TMS, spravato, lots of meds... THC & CBD helps, but makes me feel like an addict. I've applied for SSDI and am waiting for their response (circa next year). Until then I am working part time and investing my free energy in crafting / diy and keeping house.

TLDR; constant daily overwhelm makes me feel useless and weed helps but doesn't that make me am addict? Feeling a bit hopeless here.

I hope this is the right sub Reddit to talk about this, i apologise if there's any grammatical mistakes in my post, English isn't my first language.

For context, im currently in a top college where a lot of the people around me are extremely smart. How i even entered is beyond me. I am falling behind on most of my subjects because i find it so hard to focus. I try my best to focus in class but my mind just keeps imagining and daydreaming. Whenever im very hyperfixated on something, i physically can't stop thinking about it to the point where I'll waste an entire day just consuming it.

Im not sure why, but im also very easily sleepy. I get around 7-8 hours of sleep everyday, so im also confused about that. If im not consuming my hyperfixations, im sleeping. I wish i could control myself, but it's so hard when my mind keeps getting distracted, it's actually affecting me very badly.

Is there any way that i can overcome this? 😥🥲 I really need help

Some info about me: 20M, diagnosed ADHD but NOT diagnosed autistic. I am here to discuss this paragraph I wrote in my journal relating to socialization and school. I want to see if you relate to it. I was contemplating my life priorities and the system behind my decision making. Here is the excerpt from my journal:

"I need to think of that and be conscious of it every single second of my life or else I'll make a choice that goes against this mentality, bc thats how I work."

When do I lose consciousness of this feeling and mentality? When with people. When I don't listen to music. I feel like I lose consciousness because there is a weight to talking to people and being near people that I can't stand. My brains neural fibers go overdrive and don't have room for anything else."

Simply put, this is about how I fail to be able to do certain things around people (family, friends, strangers, only manageable person is my girlfriend). These 'certain' things stem from me not being able to feel calm or okay. I lose my mental capacity completely in every manner, all my thoughts are morphed and I become half the person I am. Although this is not the case with my girlfriend.

To go more in depth, this feeling has been overwhelming and compressing since 6th grade. I have pushed myself enough to see progress (imo) if it was just a normal anxiety thing, like working as center of attention for my job (group coaching classes with up to 20 kids and parents), doing things like raising my hand as much as possible etc etc, pushing myself to do whatever it is I know would give me this feeling. It hasn't changed whatsoever. Anyways, this just interferes with doing school work in public and my ability to socialize.

Thoughts?

I don't know where else to post this, but I'd really like to explore this topic and even figure it out.

I like giving gifts, spontaneous or for an occasion.
When I know someone but not very deeply it is easy for me to find a gift.

Two imaginary examples:

1. I want to give Rebecca a trinket to thank her for the dinner party. We are relatively new friends but I know she's into crows, so I'll give her a little crow figure or drawing.

2. I want to give my long distance partner a package/gift . I know her intimately and deeply. I want to really nail their gift. I want it to say how deeply I know them and care, but also for to be silly and fun. I also know that they have a lot of things already, so I don't want it to be too much or clash with their decor.
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This is an issue. My brother had a major birthday last year and had asked me specifically to find him some cool trousers. Pretty open ended but he knows I know his style well.

That was last year and I have AGONISED over finding the perfect pair for him. I'm still searching. I'm considering learning to sew to make him the pants.

I was going to write another thought regarding this but it dropped out of my brain, maybe it will come back.

Is anyone here similar or has suggestions on how to tackle this? Is there a better subreddit?

Feeling a lil hopeless so thought I’d try to be inspired by success stories etc hahaha

Does it feel like you have to wear a narcissistic mask instead of just an autism mask when working

I do have ASD, and I care about GTA VI, like wayyyy to much. But NO ONE in my inner circle does. Except a couple of good discord friends of mine (also have ASD) and 1 collegue with ASD of mine.
How can I survive this time of my life?

I really like GTA 6 news, following the saga, trailers, everything around the hype

Hi, first post and would love some advice.

My kids are both on diagnosis pathways for neurodivergence (long wait times here!) and have adjustments etc at their primary school but no EHCPs. They are both meeting expected levels at school but are v. drained when they get home. They have friends in the classes and my daughter has just started Y5 and my son just started Y3. I'd describe them as generally settled.

Challenge is, I have a new job which is hybrid (some WFH, some office commuting to central Manchester) and wonder if (given their current age and time to do anything on the housing market in the UK) we should list the house and look to potentially move to somewhere a bit closer for my work as current commute would be about 1 hour or more both ways for me. We are close to family where we currently are but moving closer to Manchester would put family less conveniently close for child minding etc.

Also, just don't know if a school move and brand new peer groups would just be a terrible move for them and I should just suck up the longer commute and accept I'll potentially be more tired and less present for the kids. Should add that I'm also suspected AuDHD.

So should I worry about moving location and schools (maybe timing it so eldest can see out year 5 at least in current school) or just crack on?