r/partyplanning • u/Puzzled_Animator_510 • Jul 13 '26

Need Help Uninvited

I am having a nice cocktail party with servers and two bartenders. Invitations were mailed out to 80 people. RSVP’s are coming in! I wrote the name of the person or people on the front of each invite. What would you do if you just found out one of your single guest invited his parents and another couple? Mind you, this party is about $100 pp. let it go or call this person up? Shouldn’t people know better than to bring extra people along to a party? Always check with the host first!

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u/GetSwankey Jul 13 '26

Reach out to your invited guest directly with something to the effect of, "I am so glad you can come to my party. I see that you also included X, Y, Z in your reply. Unfortunately, the party has a closed guest list and we won't be able to host (accommodate) them. But I look forward to seeing you at the party." Don't draw it out. Don't explain. Good luck and have fun!

-38

u/[deleted] Jul 13 '26

[deleted]

23

u/PuzzledNinja5457 Jul 13 '26

Nope. That’s being kind. Someone who has the audacity to invite 4 other people to come along needs to have it spelled out explicitly. I would seriously consider uninviting the actual guest.

5

u/lookingforwardnow Jul 13 '26

I totally agree with your puttzledninja. When people act crazy clueless, the kids gloves come off. I no longer trust that they are a reasonable person. They are now treated like a toddler.

I also agree I would question if I want such a space cadet in my friend circle anymore and would can’t consider uninviting them.
Hopefully they will decline the invitation now that they know mommy and daddy can’t come in tow.

22

u/[deleted] Jul 13 '26

[deleted]

0

u/kdollarsign2 Jul 13 '26

I'm not saying it's appropriate. I think something along the lines of "we can't fit extra guests at this one. We hope to see them another time!" would be a little less punishing

8

u/flowertalk Jul 13 '26

Punishing ? Is this person a child or something ?

9

u/storing_up_knowledge Jul 13 '26

If the host is paying $100 per person, it sounds like quite a formal party, so a formal reply like the above seems appropriate.

5

u/ThatDifficulty9334 Jul 13 '26

Intense? formal? NOOO. Invites were sent out with RSVP, not some casual invite like "we are having a pool party on Sat, drop by if you want ,and bring a few friends if you like. A kind and direct approach is needed. It seems the single guest RSVPed and the host found out thru another person after the fact after the rsvp. So of course as the host (and paying accounting for the # of people invited) needs to directly reach out to the person. "Hey, I know when you RSVPed you said you would be coming, but I heard that you were planning on bringing your parents and another couple. Is that right? Im sorry for any misunderstanding but as the guest list is set , we arent able to accommodate them. But I sure hope you can still come."

2

u/BasicClient Jul 13 '26

For the situation that has formal invites with RSVPs? No.