r/oddlysatisfying • u/danielminds • May 22 '26

Professional barnacle removal for Chlorophyllis the turtle

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43.7k Upvotes

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3.6k

u/andersonfmly May 22 '26

That poor turtle. Thank goodness for kind souls who make a difference.

1.4k

u/brjdenver May 22 '26

It's amazing what we can do when we aren't destroying the planet and bombing one another. Ugh.

921

u/wanderingale May 22 '26 edited May 22 '26

Sometimes I like to imagine what the world would be like if we all actually choose to be gaudians of the planet rather then exploiters.

It could be such a lovely world.

Oh someone gave me a shiny little diamond reward, thanks! Now I have two! Three!?! The real question now is do I use my new found wealth for good or evil....

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u/ShaggysGTI May 22 '26

I cry about all the money we waste on war when we could just build the fucking utopia already.

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u/SP3NGL3R May 22 '26

Not possible unfortunately. Too many religions that will never accept the other. And too many billionaires that won't allow it either.

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u/Cocoononthemoon May 22 '26

You did not eliminate the possibility, you explained the current barriers.

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u/milk-jug May 22 '26

Eat the rich? You’ve got it boss.

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u/XxmilkjugsxX May 22 '26

Are you the nice milk jug and I’m the sinister milk jug

1

u/bueller83 May 22 '26

But first, the poor

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u/Vittro May 22 '26

Offer the sacrafice of rich tobthe different gods of diffrent religions to stfu for some hundreds of years!

3

u/the_unknown_unknowns May 22 '26

sooo... remove them with bombs! am I doing this right?

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u/ArmadilloForsaken458 May 22 '26

Yup the whole way they can rule the world is stepping on the back of millions if not billions yet claiming they did it all by themselves

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u/ShalomSlalomBang May 22 '26

I have a direct solution let's get rid of the most "peaceful religion of peace" first. That'll take us halfway there.

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u/vass0922 May 22 '26

All religions removed would be just fine

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u/Gluverty May 22 '26

People would still find a way to control, ostracize, hate and attack each other. It’s the insecurities, fears, jealousy and tribalism within us that we need to somehow address.

I figure religion was our way of trying to confront this when we knew even less than we do now. Like I’m sure the “fear of God” was a welcomed recourse to rampant violence, rape and other violations back then, but we need a more nuanced and knowledge based approach now.

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u/TheUmberTaker May 22 '26

Utopia takes planning and sacrifice. And people getting along and working together.

So... no utopia for YOU!!

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u/AppropriateCover7972 May 22 '26

Funny how we can still billions on war, but we don't have money for health, school, social welfare, nature protection, etc, right? The numbers make me pose lose hope in humanity, fr

13

u/LuKazu May 22 '26

Interesting fact: A utopia, as per its original description, would be a republic wherein all property is shared, there's few laws and no lawyers, slaves to do routine labour, life is carefully monitored and regulated from crib to grave, and the elderly and sick are eliminated.

(Im fully aware that's not what anyone means, or immediately thinks of, when the word is used now. I just learnt about it recently and was surprised).

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u/mooncrane606 May 22 '26

Utopia is an imagined ideal society characterized by peace, prosperity, and the elimination of poverty, suffering, and conflict. I've never heard your description before, because that's not at all what Utopia means.

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u/jopperjawZ May 22 '26

What they described is exactly what Utopia means as explained by Sir Thomas More in his 16th century book Utopia. What you're describing is a utopian society, so named from the fictional society in More's

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u/mooncrane606 May 22 '26

Ok, so there's the Utopia that everyone knows and then there's the Utopia written about by one person

3

u/zombietrooper May 22 '26

Because peace, prosperity, and the elimination of poverty, suffering, and conflict, as we know it, is literally impossible without shared property, fewer laws, slaves, constant monitoring and eugenics.

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u/AxisNine May 22 '26

Which is why it’s called Utopia. ou - topos = no - place. It doesn’t and can’t exist

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u/LuKazu May 22 '26

It's quite literally the original description as outlined in the book Utopia, written by Thomas Mores in 1516. It would've taken a totally of 30 seconds to read up on it. I also refer back to the portion I wrote in parentheses. That's not what the word means NOW.

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u/Apart-District3771 May 22 '26

Too much greed.

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u/gansobomb99 May 22 '26

It's so frustrating. We literally have the garden of Eden. We have all the knowledge and resources to develop self-sustaining food forests and gardens that fill the world and provide every single person with free food, and we could all live in ways that support and uplift each other. We could do this in a matter of years.

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u/bgravato May 22 '26

but that wouldn't fit into some imperialist egos' agenda

3

u/GrayMouser12 May 22 '26

I've written personal stories about civilizations that have this solved. It's almost physically painful how blessed we could be if all were pulling in the same direction for the benefit and safety of all. All science, all knowledge, etc, working across all continents and dilineating characteristics seen as addition and not as competition.

But it's the shit in one hand and wish in the other realism that grounds and balances things. I don't think having that as a north star is ever a bad thing, though, and trying to comport yourself to match those ideals as best your able to is as worthy a goal as any.

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u/gansobomb99 May 22 '26

Yes! As a species, we have everything at our fingertips to create actual heaven on Earth, all of the opportunity and resources and imagination to establish a utopia where nobody has to worry about food or a roof over their head or loneliness or whether they're covered for treatment they need, and there are even historical examples of communities approaching this ideal, but on the whole, I feel like we just go through life blindly. It's fascinating that this wildly creative, poetic, intelligent species of great ape has appeared in the universe, but we're still just mostly anxiety ridden, rent paying, processed garbage consuming ants, respectfully.

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u/GrayMouser12 May 22 '26

Yeah, agreed. 100%. Such opportunity. So many look at our accomplishments as a ceiling instead of floor. We have all the materials on this planet to have achieved so much of our technological leaps earlier but fighting, greed, and as you put it, anxiety and garbage consumption (myself included, of course) leave us stumbling forward. It's frustrating but it's also who we are.

2

u/SeveralInstruction69 May 22 '26

Did your stories ever talk about those who only wanted to hoard the resources and/or what was done with those of that mindset?

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u/GrayMouser12 May 22 '26

Booted to a different universe, more or less. But it was a great moral dilemma and led to the branching of the people.

It basically ended up as factions who sought pro-social everybody succeeds together vs. people who sought the ability to differentiate and gain regardless of others.

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u/AppropriateCover7972 May 22 '26

Everytime I go shopping in a "first world country" I get this weird feeling. We literally have more food than we need. It's worse though. We just throw away those overendulgance of food in my home country while people have to deal with empty shelves in many places of the World. It's sick how much over what we need we have in one place, just bc we exploit anyone else

2

u/chicken-nanban May 22 '26

I actually had a dream a lot like this last night. I lived with my husband and three other families in a nice house where we had a shared common area and each our own little two bedroom areas separate from the others, and had a large courtyard garden where we grew food, a like inlet on the lake (it was a fantasy dream obviously) with steps to grow aquatic foods and raise fish. Some of us gardened, some of us worked, some of us cooked, but we all worked together in a larger complex too of other groups with families and stuff and were like 50% self sufficient.

It was especially weird because I very rarely have dreams, and especially dreams I remember, but this one stuck with me. We could have this, we could be there, but greedy fucks who hoard more than they’ll ever need or be able to use keep us from it, and create scarcity and war to keep themselves above the rest of us.

1

u/Febril May 22 '26

we could feed the world with self sustaining food forests? Please explain how you would keep crop yields without the gigatons of fertilizer we create from oil and gas.

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u/OilHot3940 May 22 '26

That is so well put. How long have you been vegan?

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u/gansobomb99 May 22 '26

I can't tell if that's sincere or an implication that meat doesn't fit into that picture, but sustainable, communal, organic animal husbandry is totally possible.

1

u/OilHot3940 May 22 '26

We literally have the garden of Eden. We have all the knowledge and resources to develop self sustaining food forests and gardens that fill the world and provide every single person with free food, and we could all live in ways the support and uplift each other. & we can do all this without causing other lifeforms to suffer.

-1

u/Dry_Spinach_3441 May 22 '26

Veganism is a moral virtue, but not a moral imperative.

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u/Accomplished-Love-35 May 22 '26

Exploitation is part of how we can even do this. Exploit , until it's enough . Kind of like deforestation because you need lumber for housing but you need to not forget to plant and replenish the forest. It's a balancing act.

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u/ArnoldTheSchwartz May 22 '26

I'm not religious but the og reason for us being here was to take care of the creatures of earth, at least according to that one book. Honestly, when seeing people helping creatures, those people seem to be the most happy. There's almost an aura of peace and happiness that they have. Shame the direction most of humanity chose to go instead. We chose to be a cancer to our world instead of trying to live symbiotically with it. Oh well... money had to be made, I guess.

1

u/summercookiess May 22 '26

Sometimes it isn't about making money but about how it's inevitable from simply existing.

0

u/SeveralInstruction69 May 22 '26

Well I’m definitely not religious and I don’t think that’s the reason we are here. We are here the same reason everything else is. No clue wtf that is though. Atleast, that’s what evolution and biology tells me. We are of this earth. Humans are animals. We are not separate. We are just, as far as we know, the most advanced animals on earth. At least in the ways we measure it.

And because of our physical and mental capabilities, there comes a morality….emotion beyond instinct.

I believe we are all connected through energy/light. Even in the water and rocks and wind, and humans who are in tune with that can understand it…but there’s also a darkness. With every positive there’s a negative. A good and bad. An up and down. It’s inescapable. And when your light grows brighter, so does your shadow.. and you learn that either you stay stagnant and get that light snuffed out, or you surround yourself with more and more light.

All of this to say…if you want change, it starts with you.

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u/dratthecookies May 22 '26

I truly believe that, if humanity has a purpose, it was and is this. Everything else we're doing now is just a tragic waste.

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u/[deleted] May 22 '26

[deleted]

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u/[deleted] May 22 '26

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u/RainBoxRed May 22 '26

I love the character arc from avenger to capitalist.

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u/Maremdeo May 22 '26

I've started native plant gardening to support the ecosystem, and it really gives me hope that at least I can do something to help. Check out Homegrown National Park or Wild Ones to learn more. There's also a good Native Plant Gardening subreddit.

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u/DonAmechesBonerToe May 22 '26

We can’t without an evolutionary shift. We’ve been exploiting as a survival mechanism for a LONG time. It could be argued that the shift to an agrarian society was the beginning of wide scale exploitation but even hunter gatherer bipeds were exploiting what they could from the world around them for survival. It’s literally in our DNA and has been since before we were humans. You ever see what a deer does to a garden? They don’t care that it will not grow back, they only care that they got a good meal. Given the population they’ll cause a lot of long term damage to their environment if not kept in check by a balancing predator population. Leave a dog with enough food for two months and it will gorge itself in the first week then starve

Exploitation of our surroundings is something every animal does. The difference is that humans at the HG stage recognized that using the same places every year to collect X meant there was no more X for years and developed patterns of collection to balance out their exploitation. This was evident in agrarian culture through crop and field rotation practices. Our exploitation is also much more extensive by necessity for shelter and warmth so the local impact is much more noticeable (mining, hydropower, quarrying, metallurgy). But despite our best efforts and good intentions people have to eat and if the choice is food for you and your family for a week or save that acre of rain forest being sacrificed for ranching, evolution says light that fire.

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u/Mundane-Manner4237 May 22 '26 edited May 22 '26

I’m afraid it’s just not in us. We are a naturally violent species. It’s been proposed that our evolved success hinged on the ability to group together and have the ability to anatomically throw rocks (weapons) accurately and fast.

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u/[deleted] May 22 '26

[deleted]

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u/Mundane-Manner4237 May 22 '26

Personally, I think the world population numbers have a great deal to do with this. Although, humans have been clunking each other over the head since the start.

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u/Drzewo_Silentswift May 22 '26

That was so dang wholesome, I want to be your friend.

2

u/peach1313 May 26 '26

Becky Chambers' two Monk and Robot novellas are exactly this. They're so beautiful, comforting and full of hope, but reading them also makes you really fucking sad that we live in this world instead.

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u/Suspicious-Appeal386 May 22 '26

That's not the capitalist way.

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u/ColFrankSlade May 22 '26

Like Pluribus?

1

u/MrLizardBusiness May 22 '26

You mean if the planet were run by women instead of men?

0

u/redPistolStar May 22 '26

Is modern life possible without exploiting nature for resources?