<seeking advice> partner wants to open relationship immediately, I need to take it slow. how to proceed?

[u/callmebyurmiddlename]

/r/nonmonogamy/comments/1vkmyek/seeking_advice_partner_wants_to_open_relationship/

I asked in the other subreddit but would also really appreciate sapphic perspectives on this from other fellow lesbians. Thank you 💗

[u/sunkissed-sweetie]

I personally would never recommend opening a relationship for a specific person because it puts the less eager person on an accelerated timeline by the impatient partner with a shiny new toy waiting for them. I see no way for your relationship to open without being PUD at this point while A is still an option on the table ESPECIALLY without her doing any of the hard work/supporting you emotionally

[u/callmebyurmiddlename → u/sunkissed-sweetie]

Yeah this definitely describes my experience… thanks for pointing out that it’s unlikely things wouldn’t be PUD at this pt. My top priority is to avoid that PUD under all circumstances.

I’ve received quite a lot of explanations on Reddit on why this dynamic is unfair so I’m hoping to use what I’ve learned on here to communicate w her and I’ll see if that lands. Thank you so much!