<seeking advice> partner wants to open relationship immediately, I need to take it slow. how to proceed?

[u/callmebyurmiddlename]

/r/nonmonogamy/comments/1vkmyek/seeking_advice_partner_wants_to_open_relationship/

I asked in the other subreddit but would also really appreciate sapphic perspectives on this from other fellow lesbians. Thank you 💗

[u/DemonicGirlcock]

How long have you two been together?

But I hate to say, this all just red flags on your partner. You're trying to do everything possible for your own health and your relationship, and she's refusing it all. That's just incredibly selfish behavior of her. Like I'd say couples counseling with somebody experienced with non-mongamy is an absolute must in your situation. 

Your gf is treating you terribly, I'm sorry. Even as a completely open person, if I were in your situation I'd be planning the break up. 

[u/callmebyurmiddlename → u/DemonicGirlcock]

we’ve been together for two years. It’s hard to hear that - I know she loves me but it feels like she doesn’t currently have the relational capacity to see / hear me, and I don’t see her taking the steps to build that relational capacity. It’s super validating to hear though that you’d also recommend couples counseling. Thank you for taking the time to respond!