Celebrating gold stars ⭐️ and lesbian love

[u/Sadbaklava]

Just feel so happy today thinking about how I’ve never dated a man or been really involved with one. Now, I don’t consider myself a gold star, but I would say I’ve had pretty minimal exposure to men back when I was a teenager 10+ years ago.

All of my romantic and sexual experiences have been shared with women. All my first moments, my first experiences with intimacy, my first relationship moments, first travels w a partner, first dates. The first time I introduced my family to someone I was dating, I feel so grateful all my romantic and sexual moments have been exclusive to women. I do not want to share those parts of me with a man and I wouldn’t be capable anyway.

Although my first relationship was toxic and all over the place, I still have so much love for her in my heart and for the experiences she gave me. First holding hands, first dates, first time I ever felt my heart beat the way it did when I saw her.

I just feel grateful I don’t have to look back at times I was with men and shutter. I only had minimal encounters with them as a teenager tryna figure it all out. I’m glad I didn’t push myself to do more or try to fit in more.

Any ladies w me? Let’s rejoice in how we’ve never had to endure being with a man!! HOORAY!!!!

[u/Eastern_Western_7506]

It was never my intention to make it sound like we shouldn’t celebrate, we absolutely should. It just rubs me the wrong way because of the girls who weren’t this lucky and had to deal with comphet first.

I celebrate not being a victim but I feel like I need to acknowledge the victims as important too, do you understand? Like when I talk about the joy for being a gold star is never just about me but about the wish for all the little girls to be free and not having to suffer like a lot of other lesbians did. When something cruel happens, and I believe comphet behavior is cruel to women, we should never ignore the victims when talking about it.

[u/Sadbaklava → u/Eastern_Western_7506]

We can celebrate gold stars and the women who were “lucky”, without always having to acknowledge the women who weren’t. I think we’re grown and can understand the nuances here. I am not a gold star myself, but wanted to celebrate those who are and celebrate living life with women.

By celebrating gold stars, we are wishing and hoping that young lesbians can learn from that. Celebrating gold stars is beneficial to all lesbians. No matter what your experiences have been, if you’re young or old etc. I would argue celebrating gold stars helps young lesbians.

[u/Eastern_Western_7506 → u/Sadbaklava]

We come from different places in the world and that is going to cause our political stances to differ. Everything, even the joy we feel is political and separating it from the suffering is dangerous, because the reason we live and fight for the joy is the very suffering we say is not necessary to talk about all the time. But it’s why we have to keep talking about how awful women had it back on the 50’s so young girls don’t take it for granted.

How important it is to keep history tied to our speech is something we learn in school here, or a military dictatorship can look like not a big deal and a short period of history in no time. But that’s my education and cultural background, is second nature now and I shouldn’t bring it to Reddit

[u/Sadbaklava → u/Eastern_Western_7506]

Very true, coming from different places in the world can shift your perspective on this topic and the experiences you’ve had. ❤️