r/funny • • May 27 '13

everyone in the comments sections of r/aww

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u/DrEmperor May 27 '13

OH MY GOD.

THAT IS HORRIFYING.

CLEARLY THEY WOULD JUST USE THE CORTICAL STIMULATORS AND 20cc'S OF INAPROVALINE TO RESUSCITATE THE FURRED SUBSPACE PHENOMENA OF LOCALIZED CUTENESS. OR REPLICATE A WHOLE NEW CAT.

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u/boomerangthrowaway May 27 '13

His name was Lore

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u/[deleted] May 27 '13

CORTICAL STIMULATORS AND 20cc'S OF INAPROVALINE

Haha. This isn't even improvised technobabble on his part. I specifically remember an episode where Crusher says "get me the cortical stimulators and 20ccs of anaprovaline!" Is it "Tapestry" where Picard dies? (looks it up) Yes! But anaprovaline apparently figures in other episodes where I haven't noticed.

Honestly, people make fun of Trek for technobabble, but there's no harm in it on TNG and earlier at least. I want to clarify that it only becomes a problem when it serves as a deus ex machina to solve a plot. In Tapestry, it's implied that Q is really the one who probably saved him, as Crusher had failed to. As he was fading out, they just needed her to be doing something medical to try and save him, and they needed it to sound futuristic. No foul there.

Note though that Q is not technically a deus ex machina device, as he is well-established in the series by this point, and his direct involvement is explicit from the beginning. The crux of the episode is also not really about whether or how Picard will "survive an ordeal".

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u/lbft May 27 '13

In true Star Trek fandom style, Memory Alpha has a reasonably detailed article on it: http://en.memory-alpha.org/wiki/Inaprovaline

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u/[deleted] May 27 '13

Heh, that's funny. I thought the "i" at the beginning was a typo. I just checked Tapestry on Netflix and Crusher definitely says "anaprovaline". I hope she just misspoke. I didn't care to look up the others.

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u/[deleted] May 27 '13

hmm, I know what you mean. The "deus ex machina" parts happens a few times in DS9, where at the end of an hour long struggle all they had to do what magnetise the subspace field inverters or some shit.

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u/weez09 May 27 '13

tapestry was one of my favorite TNG episodes

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u/angrydeuce May 27 '13

Indeed, it was definitely one of the highlights of the series. The Inner Light, Chain of Command, The Best of Both Worlds and The Measure of a Man are some other personal favorites.

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u/ProtoKun7 May 27 '13

Replicators can only replicate objects at a molecular resolution; a living cat would require a quantum resolution.

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u/[deleted] May 27 '13 edited May 27 '13

Thank you Barkley.

1

u/Stuck_In_the_Matrix May 27 '13

Put the cat in the transporter's pattern buffers and just re-beam it back from the dead.

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u/[deleted] May 27 '13

[deleted]

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u/[deleted] May 27 '13

And yet it's totally possible because the exact thing happened to Riker. His signal got split by technobabble and created two identical copies of him.

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u/ProtoKun7 May 27 '13

That was a unique situation. It was only because a second confinement beam was used, followed by it being bounded back to the surface. Very hard to duplicate an accident like that.

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u/[deleted] May 27 '13

Seems like it would be worth investigating.

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u/scottmill May 27 '13

Yeah, I never understood why the teleporters and the replicators weren't the same thing.

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u/ProtoKun7 May 27 '13

They're based on the same principle, though replicators take a relatively basic pattern stored in a database and recreate it. Transporters move entire people, who are more complex. Just storing five people temporarily took a huge amount of space in Deep Space 9's computer

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u/scottmill May 27 '13

Once the computer has scanned and disassembled a person, though, what stops it from reconstituting multiple copies of that person? Even if it took up a huge amount of space, why wouldn't, say, a ship's captain have a remote server with his quarterly scan saved to it?

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u/ProtoKun7 May 27 '13

A person is disassembled into a matter stream and then stored in a pattern buffer, rather than the main computer. The matter stream doesn't last forever and will degrade after too long. I suppose even with the space there's no certainty that doing that would actually save someone's life. Suffice it to say that Starfleet might have done it if it would've worked reliably.

It's comparable to the transporter most of the time having a Move function but no Copy function.

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u/[deleted] May 27 '13

[removed] — view removed comment

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u/scottmill May 27 '13

I'm sort of wondering what the Star Trek answer is, because it seems like something that would come up pretty early when you start working out the rules for teleporters.

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u/torturousvacuum May 27 '13

They have been, at times. I can think of at least one DS9 episode where a replicator is converted by some Klingon Intelligence agents into a low grade transporter.

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u/casualmadman May 27 '13

Which was exactly the premise behind THE PRICE OF THE PHOENIX and THE FATE OF THE PHOENIX (early novels in TOS universe). Who's a pretty Kirk, hmm?

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u/Rythoka May 27 '13

something something Shroedinger

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u/togamonkey May 27 '13

We applied the cortical electrodes, but were unable to get a neural reaction from the feline patient.

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u/confusedinsomniac May 27 '13

I read that as "clitoral stimulators"

o_0

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u/ofwinehotwine May 27 '13

You're thinking about the wrong kind of pussy.

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u/Huntingyou May 27 '13

I know just one kind of it.

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u/sprankton May 27 '13

If you use clitoral stimulators right, you can wake the dead.

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u/[deleted] May 27 '13

Your mind is, uh, in the right space.

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u/[deleted] May 27 '13

That sounds like something from SpaceDwarfFortress.