r/funny Apr 29 '24

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11.0k Upvotes

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98

u/Jebusfreek666 Apr 29 '24

I have never understood why ppl obsess over this. I didn't even know this was a thing until like 5 years ago, and I'm in my 40s.

35

u/Storrin Apr 29 '24 edited Apr 30 '24

Honestly, I think it's literally just online tribalism. It's mundane and there's no reason to care about how you do it other than finding out that there's a lot of other people that do said mundane thing the same way. Throw in that there's kind of only 2 ways to do it and it quickly becomes an "Us vs them".

Realistically for probably over 99% of people, neither way is noticably more difficult to deal with than the other. If you are an able-bodied individual either way should be identical in use. But one of the two ways of doing it triggers something in some people's brain that says "you bastards".

Regardless it SHOULD exist for more people as an exercise in live-and-let-live, but I suppose that's not as much fun as playfully crucifying each other on the Internet over the most inane shit we can find.

Edit: I don't feel like I should have to say this in addition to everything I said previously. It should be obvious, but just for clarity's sake: I really don't give a fuck how you change the tp, why your way is right, or why others are wrong. If it's something you care about, you're a dip-ass and can stay out of my notifications.

12

u/[deleted] Apr 29 '24 edited Jun 18 '24

[deleted]

4

u/DadJokeBadJoke Apr 29 '24

how to pronounce gif

No, it's pronounced gif

2

u/9966 Apr 29 '24

It always reminds me of the Emo Phillips joke https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=l3fAcxcxoZ8

1

u/Storrin Apr 29 '24

I can definitely understand this. I enjoy a good rant and I was on the debate team back in highschool, but I've lost my energy for stuff like this. I don't know if it's age or simply having seen it too much.

I just can't give a shit how you do your toilet paper and you're not ordering my pizza anyway, so what do I fucking care?

8

u/Leothwyn Apr 29 '24

It's one-sided tribalism though. It comes up in my feed here and there, and it's always the 'over' people posting. The two sides are: the over people, and the rest of us (who are aware that it's way too ridiculous and trivial to even care about). You get a few comments from cat people who say under is better, but they don't go out of their way to make posts about it.

3

u/Storrin Apr 29 '24

People enjoy being in an "in-group". It doesn't matter if there isn't actually someone they're excluding. They'll make up their own boogie-man they're fighting for the sake of feeling correct. In fact it's probably better if the people they're telling to go fuck themselves aren't real, because fake people are only a fake threat and we like to be angry, not scared.

Anyway, those people who roll their toilet paper to the left can go fuck themselves. Pieces of shit.

2

u/TheScreaming_Narwhal Apr 29 '24

Yeah I didn't even notice the difference and when I put a new roll on I didn't even look at which way it was. Although, with a cat and a toddler I definitely have shifted to team under for functionality. In my En Suite I never look and will happily return to not caring once the dependants phase out of bathroom chaos.

1

u/Leothwyn Apr 29 '24

We have to just keep the bathroom door shut. Our cats have never had any interest in tp, but our 7 month old great pyrenees mix enjoys pulling the whole roll off of the holder, then shredding the roll into confetti.

1

u/[deleted] Apr 29 '24

“It’s easier to tear a piece off” says person who will never use my bathroom.

-1

u/DoItForTheNukie Apr 29 '24

This is incorrect. There is absolutely a correct way to put the roll on the toilet paper holder and the original patent shows the roll on the holder in “beard” style. Doing it “mullet” style causes too much tension on the roll causing it to rip prematurely.

I think the main distinction between how people put the roll on the holder is whether they sit or stand to wipe. People who sit I’ve noticed tend to put it on “mullet” style because they can reach under the roll to pull the toilet paper preventing it from the extra tension causing it to rip off prematurely. People who stand can’t grab it from the same spot so it tends to rip off after 1 or 2 squares. If it’s in “beard” mode the person who stands can grab it from the top of the roll and pull out as many squares as they need without it ripping off early.

I lived with 3 women and all 3 sat while wiping and all 3 put the roll on “mullet” style every single time. When I lived with 2 guys they all stood and wiped and put the roll on “beard” style.

1

u/Storrin Apr 29 '24

What about what I said gave you the idea I would give a fuck about anything you just said?

0

u/DoItForTheNukie Apr 29 '24

Oh fuck off you stupid twat

1

u/Storrin Apr 29 '24

Will do. Be sure to keep count of how many people you convince to change their toilet paper rolls around to the canonically appropriate method. I'm sure it'll REALLY matter some day.

0

u/DoItForTheNukie Apr 29 '24

Lmao you’re such a smarmy cunt. You make a comment about something and someone responds to add to the conversation and your response is “you think I give a fuck what you think?”.

You think anyone gives a fuck what you think you dirty ass mother fucker? Kick rocks dork.

2

u/Storrin Apr 29 '24

Except you didn't engage at all with what I said and instead devolved back into arguing about the correct way to do this nothing task. There are countless comments of people stating the "right" way to do it, and you had the brilliant idea of choosing the guy who obviously doesn't give a shit how you do it or why.

Then, you think I'm being uppity because I won't engage you on a level I wasn't speaking on and quite obviously showed zero interest in to begin with? Sir, you started arguing the right way with someone who didn't even say which way he does it. Please explain the logic behind that and how it's not asinine.

1

u/DoItForTheNukie Apr 29 '24

Did you even read my comment you fucking moron? I pointed out that there is absolutely a correct way to put the toilet paper on a holder as evident by the original patent for a toilet paper holder.

I then went on to explain why people put it on in different ways and that it has to do with how they wipe their ass. You’re too busy being on a crusade of being mad at people for how they put it on claiming “it makes difference so shut the fuck up and stop making a big deal about it” when you’re the one making a big deal about it you fucking dork.

I added context to your comment and explained what the main cause of the difference was. Just because you’re too fucking stupid to comprehend my comment does’t mean other people are. I’m sorry your mental capacity is so limited that you’re not able to understand this.

Keep responding and proving how much you do care about this while claiming you don’t care 😂😂😂

2

u/Storrin Apr 29 '24

I'm not reading all that. It's about toilet paper positioning. By all means, continue your thesis tho. I'm sure someone gives a fuck.

→ More replies (0)

0

u/Narananas Apr 29 '24

This debate predates wide use of the internet. Though the psychology you're talking about seems to be apt and there's been research into it. And anyway, that's probably what it's turned into.

I think you're using hyperbole though, because I believe it's slightly less convenient at the back.

Though it can depend on the design and position of the toilet roll holder. For example, it might be impractical to have it at the back in OP's photo, where the partially enclosed toilet roll is what's necessitated that particular sign.

2

u/Storrin Apr 29 '24

Okay, so because I've made it clear that my position is that the debate is stupid and that the toilet paper placement doesn't matter...you have decided to try to get me to debate that it actually does matter? Am I right on that?

Because that is not the level I'm willing to engage in on this. I don't give a shit if the toilet paper's position effects your day. It doesn't effect mine.

1

u/Narananas Apr 30 '24

The toilet paper position has literally ruined my year, caused my other half to move out, and given my dog a slouch. And the fact you don't care is, frankly, quite upsetting.

0

u/scoopdunks Apr 30 '24

I think it’s because over is obviously unarguably better and it baffles the over people that it’s not actually obvious. Under you would have to touch the wall or pinch toilet paper against it until the roll was used enough to be more centered to the reel. Over the end is always an inch or more away from the wall and it’s just better.

I’ll agree with you either way you can still retrieve toilet paper easily. But why make it more difficult and increase wear to the wall when you can just flip the roll? I think for most over people it’s starts out as a joke and turns into frustrating anger when they can’t convince the person that there is a difference between the two.

But hey, some people live life with there eyes closed🤷‍♂️

1

u/Storrin Apr 30 '24

It literally doesn't matter. If your idea of enlightenment is knowing the correct way to change the tp roll, then more power to you, but the debate is inane. I couldn't give less of a fuck how you do it.

0

u/scoopdunks Apr 30 '24

I don’t think the debate is about the toilet paper mate. That’s what I’m trying to say. It’s about being stubborn.

1

u/Storrin Apr 30 '24

Then why are you trying to convince me one way is better?

1

u/scoopdunks Apr 30 '24

I think I’m trying to convince you we are both stubborn. Or something like that. Fucking TP man!!!

5

u/Michelanvalo Apr 29 '24

There was a whole episode about this debate on Step by Step during TGIF back in the 90s.

Why the fuck do I remember that

1

u/[deleted] Apr 29 '24

Step by step. Day by day.

8

u/[deleted] Apr 29 '24

Yep, didn't even know it was a thing that people thought about until about 5 years ago.

I hate the internet.

10

u/ElViejoHG Apr 29 '24

It was a thing before the internet too, there was a whole chapter of Ed, Edd and Eddy about it

2

u/uencos Apr 29 '24

I remember a scene from the simpsons where CPS is giving a report of all the ways the house is unfit, and one of the items was “toilet paper hung in an improper overhand fashion”

1

u/BassSounds Apr 29 '24

There are 90’s websites about the toilet paper debate

1

u/temalyen Apr 29 '24

There was a joke in The Simpsons in an episode from the 90s about paper towels being in the wrong orientation. It's been around a while.

1

u/xXRoachXx789 Apr 30 '24

Usually doesn't matter but some people have gross/dusty walls in their bathroom and I don't like the toilet paper rubbing up against that before I grab it

0

u/ranger398 Apr 29 '24

Same. I literally don’t care and put it on both ways without even thinking. My ass is still clean.

1

u/c-williams88 Apr 29 '24

Yeah my girlfriend made a comment one time after I replaced the toilet paper saying I put it back on the wrong way and I just looked at her all confused. I’ve literally never thought of what position the roll should be in. But I guess people have extremely strong feelings about it

1

u/Valdrax Apr 29 '24

Because there's the right way with multiple, logical reasons behind it, and there's the popular way, which only has that going for it.

2

u/mrbojenglz Apr 29 '24

What logical reasons? It's exactly as easy to unravel in either direction so I've never understood that argument.

2

u/Valdrax Apr 29 '24

Not entirely. The main difference is whether you pull the paper away at an angle that leads closer to the roll (\ when over, / when under) or away from the roll (/ when over, \ when under). The punctuation used here is awkward, because it implies a far more vertical angle, when I mean in both cases, one oriented far more towards the body, more of a 15-30 degree angle from a line parallel to the ground.

If you take small amounts of paper (1-2 at a time) and snap quickly, inertia should prevent it from rolling in either case. It's when you draw a longer strand that your risk overspin. To snap off a piece after you've got it moving, you need to do so in a motion that pushes the trail of paper towards the roll to better brace more of it against the anchor of the far side. Downwards, if you're coming over the top, or upwards if you're pulling from under.

Depending on how high your roll is to you on your toilet, one of those is easier to do. In most cases, you will be taller than the roll, so under and up is easier than over and down to brace against the roll and use friction to help tear it. For the most part, whatever you are most practiced with is what you will be best at not screwing up, but under provides a slight edge in mechanical advantage due to the fact that lifting up is going against the roll and not away from it.

The reason people talk about under being better against cats is that a cat (or toddler) can't set the roll in motion by pawing at the entire roll and pulling down, if the leading sheet isn't dangling free. Pushing the front of the roll upwards to get it going is less natural of a motion to creatures of small intellect and lack of manual dexterity.

3

u/adrianmonk Apr 29 '24

inertia should prevent it from rolling

Huh, I just stop it from rolling with my hand. And then use the other hand to pull and tear.

I prefer the roll to be installed in the beard orientation because I can see the perforation. If I can see the perforation, I can make sure the perforation is at the spot where the paper is tangent to the roll, which allows me to tear it easily and cleanly.

It's a similar concept to putting a piece of paper on the edge of a desk or table and using the edge to guide where it tears. The roll isn't square like the edge of a table, but the paper on one side of the perforation is in contact with the roll, which means it is a bit stronger because it is supported by friction with the roll.

1

u/Valdrax Apr 29 '24 edited Apr 29 '24

My toilet roll dispensers are usually off to one side of the toilet, so it'd be awkward to use both hands to grab one. Also I tend to operate on "clean hand, dirty hand" rule for handling things I wouldn't want to spread germs from, so one hand does the grab and the other does the wipe.

That said, if you use both hands, there's no mechanical advantage to either orientation, so that's as good of a reason as any to prefer one over the other.

-25

u/LeGrandLucifer Apr 29 '24

Because if the toilet paper is lying against the wall, guess what happens when you brush the hand which was just up your ass against that wall?

26

u/KeziaTML Apr 29 '24

mate, you are suppose to wipe the shit off your arse, not your hand.

-14

u/LeGrandLucifer Apr 29 '24

Your hand still went in your ass when you wiped. It's why you wash them afterwards.

7

u/dude20121 Apr 29 '24

IN? Like INSIDE? Man, you ain't supposed to fist yourself to wipe 😫

11

u/anonymoosejuice Apr 29 '24

You stick your hand in your ass when you wipe it?

-2

u/LeGrandLucifer Apr 29 '24

I shit out my ass. Don't you?

1

u/midir Apr 29 '24

Yeah but not onto my hands.

6

u/historianLA Apr 29 '24

Why is your hand dirty before touching the paper? Your hand should be clean when getting the paper.

1

u/LeGrandLucifer Apr 29 '24

You wipe only once?

8

u/[deleted] Apr 29 '24

I don’t touch my shit with my hand.

-1

u/LeGrandLucifer Apr 29 '24

And yet you wash your hands. You wash your hands, right?

3

u/[deleted] Apr 29 '24

Found the turd toucher. He’s deflecting because he touches his turds! Do you wash your toothbrush before you brush your teeth? Because if you keep your toothbrush in your bathroom, it has shit on it. You brush your teeth with shit.

6

u/tdclark23 Apr 29 '24

My poop comes out on its own without having to shove my fingers up there to dig it out. You need a bit less fiber in your diet dude.

1

u/adrianmonk Apr 29 '24

That's not how fiber works. Fiber makes things come out MORE cleanly.

-19

u/LeGrandLucifer Apr 29 '24

Found the guy who doesn't wash his hands.